Author's Notes: So, there were a few comments on the Xi Fa Xiang Gao being "overpowered" in the previous chapter. Now, the actual explanation for what Shampoo did will be coming out in the next chapter, but I will advise you all to remember this: Shampoo is A: unable to express herself with 100 percent clarity in Japanese at this point, and B: willing to lie to Ranma & Nabiki to try and make them like her better. I promise she won't be using that to just wash away literally every trouble to face their little family in the future.
I will admit that I'm not entirely that happy with how the previous chapter came off, but then, I didn't originally intend to make a two-parter out of that story. I had some major writer's block there.
Still, I'm glad folks enjoyed it, and that they continue to enjoy this work. I'm especially pleased that people are enjoying my take on Shampoo and Nabiki; it's been a very long time since I was a regular writer for fanfiction.
Chapter 14: Takeout TKO!
It was a typical Sunday morning in Nerima. The sun was shining, birds were singing, and the sounds of violent combat were echoing from the Tendo Dojo.
"Gimme that here, old man!" Ranma roared, bare feet pounding a tattoo against the wooden floorboards.
"Greedy old fool! You should have fallen into the Spring of Drowned Pig, not the Spring of Drowned Panda!" Shampoo snarled, so enraged that she had instinctively abandoned her fumbling grasp of spoken Japanese.
"What do you little girls take me for?" Genma shot back over his shoulder, leading the impromptu parade with two bowls full of rice and pickled vegetables in his hands - Ranma and Shampoo's breakfasts, and the source of their mutual ire.
"Honestly... are you three ever going to grow up? These early morning duels are so pointless," Nabiki sighed as her fiancé, her unwanted co-wife, and her prospective father-in-law began racing around the dining room where she and the other Tendos were already seated.
"Yoink!"
Nabiki blinked, then looked down at the empty space where her as-yet untouched breakfast bowl had sat. She promptly squeezed her chopsticks so hard they broke as realization dawned, and brought with it anger. "Hey! That's my breakfast!" she protested, leaping up to join in the chase.
"Stop whining, girl! You've been slacking off long enough as it is - you got lucky with the Golden Pair, and you know it! Time you did something other than sit around on your ever-widening rump!" Genma mockingly called back at her.
"My 'rump' is flawless!" The stung Nabiki indignantly protested, the cutting words pushing her to sprint as fast as she could, determined to beat some respect into the incorrigible rogue that was Genma Saotome. Not even the girls she knew whispered behind her back in Furinkan would have said something so negative about her looks!
"Self denial and constant exercise is the path of a true martial artist," Soun mildly commented, pausing to take a bite of pickled eggplant. "Through these things alone may a martial artist attain enlightenment," he concluded, before bursting his fried egg to add some yolk to his breakfast rice.
Akane sighed, poking sullenly at her rice with her chopsticks.
"Is something wrong, Akane?" Kasumi asked in concern.
"Why doesn't Mr. Saotome want to train me? I'm the martial artist in the family; Nabiki just got lucky in one fight!" the youngest Tendo complained.
"...You actually want Mr. Saotome to train you the way he does Ranma and the others?" Kasumi responded, giving her little sister a confused look.
Akane stole a glance at the garden, where Genma was loudly taunting three furious and hungry teenagers. "Okay, maybe not... but I just wish they'd take me seriously as a martial artist..."
"You could always ask if you can train with them," the eldest Tendo suggested mildly.
At that, Akane scoffed. "Go crawling to those jerks Ranma and Shampoo? Thanks, but no thanks," she scowled.
"I didn't suggest crawling, Akane," Kasumi noted in a mild rebuke that her little sister, predictably, ignored. Kasumi bit back a sigh of her own. 'Oh, Akane... sometimes, you're too stubborn for your own good...'
Meanwhile, in the garden, the fight was still raging. Had they not been involved, Ranma and Shampoo would have admitted an admiration for Genma's efforts; it was harder than it sounded to fend off attacks from three angry assailants at once, all whilst juggling three breakfast bowls without spilling them. Of course, as those were their breakfast bowls, all they really cared about was putting a certain gluttonous old fool in the dirt so that they could eat!
In the face of such determination, Genma's fate was inevitable. He squalled as Ranma landed a kick to his back that sent him flying into the koi pond, his three stolen bowls of food launching into the air from the impact. Nabiki's eyes widened as she realized one spiraling bowl of rice and vegetables was arcing her way.
"I got it, I got it!" she cried out impulsively, reaching for the erstwhile breakfast. 'Oh, who am I kidding? I'm never gonna...'
And then, just as it had done when Ryoga had nearly squashed her and her henchwomen by accident, time mysteriously slowed down. Nabiki could see the bowl with unprecedented clarity, watching as it sank through the air like a pebble dropped into a pot full of honey. She reached up, rising to her toe-tips for a little extra lift, and found herself plucking it from the air with ease, whereupon time immediately shifted back into its normal pace again.
"...I got it?" she breathed, staring in wonder at the bowl. 'How did I do that?!'
"Nice work, Nabiki! For non-martial artist, you sure move like one," Shampoo chirped, having evidently caught the other two bowls herself.
"Yeah, you were pretty good there, Nabiki," Ranma chimed in, walking over to the two girls. "Guess pops' training was good for something after all, eh? Changing your mind about getting into training?" he joked.
"Oh, please," Nabiki scoffed, playfully rolling her eyes. "Hitting things is your job; mine is to sit on the sidelines and look cute."
"Your loss," Shampoo said, handing one of the bowls over to Ranma.
"Thanks, Shampoo," said Ranma... who promptly began scarfing down the contents as if his life depended on it.
"Whoa! Take it easy, Ranma, you'll choke," Nabiki giggled.
"Yeah, yeah," Ranma grunted around a mouthful. Swallowing it, he added, "If I were you girls, I'd start eating too - pops will try to steal 'em again as soon as he gets his courage back..."
With that, he resumed his gorging, and Shampoo only thought about it a moment before she began to eat as well. Nabiki stared between them, glanced at the panda lurking over by the pond, and then looked at her bowl. She hesitated... and then her stomach growled, her hunger bluntly thrusting its way into the forefront of her thoughts, and she began to eat as well, scooping up serves of rice, egg and pickles as quickly as she could without choking.
'...Something strangely satisfying about this...' she admitted to herself.
'Obnoxious old man! Truly, he seems to be determined to be the one blight upon my relationship with Ranma. But no matter; at least these farcical morning duels seem to be assisting me in building a rapport with my husband... and I must admit, I think they are providing my martial arts skills with a legitimate improvement. Still, I look forward to great-grandmother taking him down a notch or two...' Shampoo mused as she ate.
'Stupid pops! I thought we weren't supposed to pick on girls? Coulda fooled me, with how he's treating Shampoo - and now Nabiki, too?! Greedy old fool. Man, Kasumi's a great cook... not that Shampoo's bad, neither. Huh, I wonder how well Nabiki does in the kitchen? I mean, she's Kasumi's sister; surely she's gotta know how to cook, right?' Ranma wondered.
Sitting at the table, Akane sneezed softly. Fortunately, she'd already finished her breakfast. Glancing at the teens in the garden, she stood up. "Thanks for the food, Kasumi. I'm going to the dojo to train," she informed her sibling, before wandering off.
Yes, it was another typical morning at the Tendo Dojo...
Once the late diners had finished their breakfast, and the mess of the morning meal was cleared away, the three teens settled down in front of the television, with Soun quietly reading his newspaper behind them.
"So... what Airens feel like doing today?" Shampoo asked quietly.
"I was actually planning to meet up with Kikuko and Ryonami at the pool, since it's supposed to be a lovely sunny day today," Nabiki replied.
"Ooh, that sound nice! Airen Ranma, you and Shampoo go too?" the Chinese Amazon suggested eagerly.
""Eh, count me out," Ranma grunted dismissively.
"But airen! Why?" Shampoo protested.
"What's the point in going to the pool when I can't even have fun in the water?" Ranma pointed out.
"I thought you and your father swam to China? Don't tell me a little Japanese pool has you scared," Nabiki teasingly observed.
"I ain't scared 'a nothing!" Ranma protested indignantly. "But if I go in a guy and come out a girl, everybody's gonna freak. It just ain't worth the headache," he grumbled.
"So why not just go as a girl to begin with? Nobody will see you change that way," Nabiki suggested.
"Ech, no thanks," Ranma scowled.
"Aw, come on; you, me, Shampoo, Kikuo and Ryonami... we could make it a girl's day out!" Nabiki giggled, unable to resist teasing Ranma when he was acting like this.
"I'm a guy!" was the instinctive protest.
"Very sexy guy, too," Shampoo chimed in. "But if Ranma want to stay home alone with Shampoo, we can have fun together whilst Nabiki is away," she suggested, smiling salacious as she subtly stroked his shoulder.
Ranma shivered and flinched away from the touch, trying to ignore the pang of guilt he felt at the obvious flash of hurt on Shampoo's face from the gesture. "Ah... no thanks, Shampoo..." he insisted as solidly as he could... which wasn't as firmly as he wished to sound.
Before the debate could proceed any further, life was to intervene...
"Hello? Is anyone home?" came a strange voice, hailing down the corridor from the front door.
Soun looked up from his newspaper, even as the three teens twisted in the direction of the disturbance. "Huh. Sounds like someone's at the door," he commented.
"I'll get it," Kasumi responded, already walking for the twisting corridor that led from the dining room to the genkan. "Hello? Who's there?"
Even as she was calling out in greeting, a man stepped around the corner, clad in a dark blue business outfit with black trims and a floppy red hat, waving a traditional paper fan and chuckling warmly as he came. "Sorry about that! The door was open, so I let myself in," he declared as he passed Kasumi and went straight into the dining room.
Soun rose from his seated position to greet the newcomer. "Oh! And who might you be, stranger?" he asked.
The large-eared stranger simply smiled and withdrew a second fan, spreading them both open. "My name is Daikoku - Hideyoshi Daikoku. I'm looking for Ranma - Ranma Saotome. He does live here, doesn't he?"
"Hey, Ranma, he's looking for you?" Nabiki asked, turning inquisitively to her fiancé, an act that Shampoo mirrored.
Ranma simply gave them both a confused stare and a shrug of his shoulders before he stood up and walked around the table to face the man. "Yeah, that's me, I'm Ranma Saotome..."
At Ranma's words, the stranger's face lit up. "Oh, Ranma! It's me, your dad!" he cried, flinging his arms out wide before leaping forward and embracing the startled teenager. "At last I've found you, son!"
"Hey, get'im offa me!" Ranma squawked, whilst the rest of the audience stared in shock at this completely unexpected turn of events. Even Akane emerged onto the scene, drawn by the shouting that she could hear all the way from the dojo proper.
"...I did not see that coming," a wide-eyed Nabiki admitted to Shampoo.
The Chinese Amazon simply stared hard at the stranger, eyes furrowed in thought before her gaze shifted. Nabiki followed her eyes, and watched as Genma the panda crept his way into the bushes nearby, doing his best to hide whilst all attention was gone.
"Please, call me dad," the stranger continued, ignoring the audience his actions had gathered.
"Dad?!" Ranma squeaked.
"Of course! Once you marry my little girl, you'll become my true and legal heir," Hideyoshi chuckled, finally loosening his bear hug. Turning towards the genkan, he raised a hand to his mouth to magnify his words and called, "You can come out now, Kaori!"
And down the hall came a female figure, clad from head to toe in the traditional white regalia of a shiromuku, the Shinto wedding kimono. Her tabi-clad feet glided across the floor, face almost completely obscured by her hood but still graceful as a swan. She walked right up to the startled residents and then knelt in the formal style, fingertips touching the floor as she inclined her head in a traditional bow.
"Greetings, future husband," she said to Ranma, her voice pitched almost whisper-low, the spitting image of the idealized Japanese bride.
'Oh, just who are you trying to kid?' Nabiki thought spitefully, envy and what she would have denied as a trace of fear wriggling up from the depths of her stomach like acid-coated eels.
At her side, Shampoo's dainty little hands curled into dainty little fists, the joints of her knuckles popping with the crackle of breaking nutshells.
Oblivious to the tension filling the air, despite the fact you could have cut it with a Western butter knife, the strange man claiming himself as Ranma's father merely smiled with fatherly joy. "Yeah, haha, she sure is a beauty now, isn't she?"
Soun's head flicked back and forth between Ranma and the mysterious newcomer Kaori before he finally found his voice, thrusting an accusatory finger at Nabiki's fiancé. "Ranma! What is the meaning of this?!"
"I don't know! I don't know!" Ranma shrieked emphatically, too confused and shocked to have any guile that could be seen.
Hideyoshi simply laughed yet again, but finally released his hold on Ranma, instead draping a paternal arm across Ranma's shoulders. "Don't worry, son; your father has already agreed to the match," he informed Ranma, covering his mouth with a fan as he spoke, which completely failed to prevent anyone else from hearing what he said.
"Oh he did, hmm?" Shampoo murmured sourly, casting an evil eye at her father-in-law.
"Now, where is Genma, anyhow?" Kaori's father asked, looking around.
By this point, Kasumi had brought in a kettle for the obligatory making of tea, which Nabiki grabbed and began tipping over the head of the still-skulking panda. "Come on, the jig is up, Mr. Saotome," she told him.
The thunder of feet from behind her made her step aside as her father charged up, carrying an iron tub filled with boiling hot water, which he unceremoniously poured over Ranma's father. "Explain yourself, Saotome! What's going on?!" he demanded in a voice that bespoke of the authority and presence he so rarely displayed anymore.
The now-human, soaking wet and faintly steaming Genma looked up at his old friend, and mopped his brow with a kerchief. "Did you have to use boiling water, Tendo?" he asked weakly, a feeble attempt at a conciliatory smile on his face.
"That's the least of your worries, you..." Soun trailed off, looming ominously over Genma.
The commotion, of course, drew the attention of Ranma and Hideyoshi, the latter of which smiled. "Ah, there you are, Genma!"
"Yeah, there he is!" Ranma spat, lunging forward and making a sweeping kick that forced Genma to leap to evade it, the big man soaring over his son's head and landing right in front of the stranger.
"You left so very quickly," Kaori's father observed with a darkly cheerful tone.
Genma visibly blanched, and spun on his heel. "Yes, well, I..." he began to make his excuses, trying to creep away from the strange visitor.
Of course, the attempt was an absolute failure, with Ranma grabbing his father by the lapels of his gi and shaking him. "What'd you do this time?!" he demanded, glaring into his feebly grinning father's face.
"Ranma m'boy! Well, you see, I...uh..." Genma's forced cheer subsided as he trailed off before his shoulders and face slumped, the man visibly resigning himself to what was going to happen. "Try to understand, boy - things were different..."
"Uh huh..." Ranma drawled sarcastically, tapping his foot with impatience.
"It all started fifteen years ago," Genma began, staring dramatically off into the distance. "You were just a little baby then, but even then, I knew you would be a great martial artist. So I went on a training expedition, with you strapped to my back. We traveled many strange lands, and faced many perils together..."
"Sounds like the prelude to a cheesy martial arts movie," Nabiki quipped, her eyes like chips of the proverbial ice she was associated with over a thin 'smile'.
"Sh! This sound like it be good!" Shampoo chided her, which made Nabiki stare at her in confusion.
Not helping Nabiki's understanding was the little bowl currently nestled in the crook of Shampoo's arm. 'Where'd she get popcorn?'
"One of those perils was the constant risk of starvation, and that was what brought me to the camp of Mr. Daikoku and his infant daughter Kaori..." Genma continued.
"Yes, he showed up as I was eating the last of my supplies, begging me for food," Hideyoshi interjected. "I remember it well. He was a thin, ragged man, scorched by the sun, who went straight for my food like a starving animal."
"I was desperate; I pleaded with him for food, and he refused me - a man in desperate need, with a child wailing in hunger on my back!" Genma proclaimed, not looking in Mr. Daikoku's direction.
"I had nothing but the food in my own mouth, and hadn't eaten since yesterday myself! But still, when I saw he had risked the life of his own son, I did offer him some pity," the Daikoku patriarch rebutted.
"But at a terrible price... in exchange for a single fish, he demanded I give him my only son, to be raised as the Daikoku heir through marriage to his daughter, Kaori," Genma lamented.
"You liar!" Hideyoshi erupted. "You said you would do anything for food, and then I asked if that 'anything' would include giving up the child on your back. Yes, as I admitted then, a male heir to my family's legacy was what I desired, and of course I wanted to provide Kaori with a good husband, but you were the one who decided that yes, you would sell your son to me for a fish!"
Silence fell over the assembled audience, broken only by the sound of a koi leaping in the pond. Ranma himself stared at Genma, visibly dumbfounded. "...You sold me for one crummy little stinking fish, huh?" he asked weakly.
Genma had the audacity to give his son a cocky grin as he held up two fingers. "He also threw in the rice and two pickles," he chuckled, sounding legitimately pleased at his bargaining skills.
Faster than the eye could follow, Ranma punched his father repeatedly, leaving him flat on his back on the ground. "What kinda father are you?!" the appalled teenager demanded.
"Great-grandmother, once you have arrived and the unpleasantries are through, we must confer on a way to mitigate Genma's influence upon our future family," Shampoo muttered to herself. Of course, as she was speaking in her native language, nobody there could understand her anyway. Although, as Shampoo went back to munching popcorn at the impromptu soap opera show, Nabiki resolved to learn Shampoo's dialect of Chinese...quickly.
Smirking and fanning himself idly, Mr. Daikoku looked down on his stricken counterpart. "I know I can never take your place in Ranma's little heart, Genma, but I'll try to be a good father."
"I'm sure you would," Genma replied, clearly not thinking all to clarly after his recent blows to the head.
'As if you're really that much better than he is,' Nabiki thought disdainfully. Then she squeaked as her father's fingers suddenly clamped desperately onto her shoulders and she found herself forcibly wheeled around and all but thrust at the man who had disrupted what was looking like a peaceful day for once.
"Wait just a minute now! There's something you need to know! Ranma has a fiancée!" Soun insisted, panic visibly written on his face for all to see as he gently shook Nabiki back and forth like a human-sized warding charm against evil.
'Oh, gee, thanks daddy, just throw me under the bus!' Nabiki thought sourly, turning her not so inconsiderable ire upon her own errant sire. 'I do believe we shall be having words later. Sharp ones, with lots of pointy consonants.'
To his credit, Mr. Daikoku looked genuinely shocked to hear that. "What's this? Is it true, girl?!"
Nabiki stole a breath to center her thoughts, brushed off her father's clinging fingers, took a step over to Ranma and looped her arm with his before giving the intruder her best winning smile. "That's right. Ranma and I are engaged, and quite happily so, aren't we darling?"
She directed this last part at Ranma, nuzzling her head affectionately against his shoulder before stealing a glance up at his face. She was a little put out to see that Ranma looked kind of startled by the action, though gratified by the dopey smile that showed he certainly didn't object. Then his arm slipped around her shoulders and pulled her in closer, and she smirked proudly.
"I see... well, that complicates things, I do admit," Hideyoshi said, nodding his head before gently smacking his fist into his palm. "You obviously have a certain amount invested in the boy. Well, I'm a reasonable man; let's talk about compensation - how much would be reasonable?"
To Nabiki's surprise, Soun visibly looked intrigued by what the Daikoku patriarch was implying. "So... how much do you got?" he asked thoughtfully.
"Don't you dare, daddy!" Nabiki interjected with surprising (to everyone who knew her, especially) outrage, stepping away from Ranma to jab a finger under his nose. "Money isn't important here!"
Incredulous stares from her father and both of her sisters bored into Nabiki, who blinked in shock as her own words registered. 'Did I actually just say that?! What have you done to me, Ranma?' She glanced over at her fiancé, who just seemed confused by the response. 'Look at you... you don't even have a clue why that's so shocking, do you? I don't know if I want to smack you or kiss you for that...'
Once Soun got over the shock of hearing those words from Nabiki's mouth, of all his daughters, he shook his head and got back into character.
"Sir, your offer is refused!" he declared boldly, pushing his way into Hideyoshi's space. "After Ranma marries my Nabiki, he'll help to carry on the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts!"
Hideyoshi promptly pushed back, spitting, "I've already named him heir to the Daikoku School!"
The two glared at each other, trying to stare each other down, a silent battle of wills that lasted until more voices sounded from the genkan. "Hello? Is anybody home?"
"Oh, we have more visitors! Such a day it is today," Kasumi noted in sweetly sincere surprise, already sweeping off to greet them. Kaori politely shuffled aside to avoid being in the way.
The Tendo and Daikoku patriarchs ignored her, continuing their staring match.
"The promise his father and I made was done when we had just finished out training! It predates the birth of even Kasumi, never mind Ranma and Kaori!" Soun bellowed in full fettle, letting his propensity for Brian Blessed levels of bombast go at full tilt.
"I have been looking for Genma for the last fourteen years! My son is rightfully promised to me!" Hideyoshi roared back.
They resumed their glaring match, even as Kasumi arrived, bringing with her two men that Nabiki recognized as the owners of local restaurants; Mr. Aoi, who ran a donburi restaurant, and Mr. Goro, who owned a ramen cafe. "Father? These gentlemen wish to speak with you," Kasumi informed him.
Soun tore himself away from his match and gave the visitors a polite smile and a bow of welcome. "Why, yes, hello! How may I help you?"
It was Mr. Aoi who spoke up first. "Good day, Mr. Tendo! We're here on behalf of our venues to ask if you would be interested in being our sponsored champion in today's Miss Martial Arts Takeout Race?"
Soun blinked. That was definitely not something you heard every day. "I'm sorry... Miss Martial Arts Takeout Race?"
"It's a little competition we're holding to see who has the best delivery girls around. We thought that the Tendo Dojo might be interested in participating... after all, the skill of your dojo's members is the stuff of local legend," Mr. Aoi explained.
Soun visibly puffed up with pride at that, but then shook his head. "I'm sorry, but I'm in the middle of some rather unpleasant business at the moment, and I don't think I will be able to-"
"Just a minute there, Soun Tendo," Hideyoshio Daiokuku interjected smoothly, injecting himself into the conversation with kitchen grease-like smoothness. "I do believe these gentlemen may have just provided us with an answer to our dilemma. Might we talk in private?"
"Of course. Gentlemen, if you'll excuse me for a few moments..."
Naturally, Ranma, Nabiki, Akane and Shampoo watched the Tendo and Daikoku patriarchs walk away into the backyard, and then immediately stole off after them, spying on the proceedings from behind the bushes.
Fanning himself idly, Hideyoshi started speaking first. "As it so happens, my daughter was going to participate in that race herself. Since we seem to be at an impasse on how to resolve this little conflict, why not do it in the race? Your Nabiki vs. my Kaori; whoever wins the race gets to be Ranma's fiancée."
Soun hummed thoughtfully and rubbed his chin. 'It's a risky gamble... but, after Genma's training, I doubt that any ordinary girl could outrun Nabiki...' He nodded slowly. "I'm not opposed... but those men were most likely expecting to recruit my youngest daughter, Akane."
"Have them both compete, then! It is a serious challenge, it is only fair that your other daughters be allowed to help their sister," Hideyoshi declared magnanimously.
"Then Shampoo help too!"
The two grown men started, whilst the other three teens almost gave the game away themselves as Shampoo brazenly walked out and straight up to them.
It was Hideyoshi who managed to gather his scrambled wits first. "Eh!? What's that, girl?"
"You just say is only fair that Nabiki's sisters help her in race. So Shampoo volunteer to help sister too." Shampoo was the picture of cool, staring expectantly into Mr. Daikoku's eyes.
"...Pardon me, but you don't take after Soun very much," Hideyoshi observed cautiously, his eyes darting to the 'newcomer' and the Tendo Patriarch in visible hesitance.
"Shampoo adopted," the Chinese Amazon replied flatly.
The large-eared man gnawed his lip, but then slowly nodded. "As you say, I did say it was only fair, given the stakes... very well. If you can get a restaurant to sponsor you, then you can compete against my daughter for the future of Ranma's engagement."
"It's a deal, then!" Soun declared, having managed to swallow his disgust at letting Shampoo falsely claim a relationship to him.
"But what if neither Tendos nor Daikokus win the race?" Shampoo interjected.
"Oh! Hmph. Well, in that case, whichever side got further along will be considered the winner. Sound reasonable?"
"Eminently so," Soun replied, nodding sagely.
The two patriarchs bowed to each other to signal their agreement, and the three teens eavesdropping quickly scrambled back to the living room, pretending they hadn't been spying on the pair. Evidently, it worked, as the two men walked past them without a glance, even as Shampoo followed demurely along behind them. She didn't meet the inquisitive gaze that Akane, Nabiki and Ranma all directed her way, even as Soun approached the two restaurateurs.
"Sirs? The Tendo Dojo is interested in participating in your contest. My daughters Akane and Nabiki both want to compete, but so does one of my students; do you have a third restaurant interested in acting as her sponsor?"
The two men looked puzzled for a brief moment, before politeness took over. Mr. Goro scratched his beard and answered, "I think that Mr. Hayate was still looking for a competitor to represent his unagi restaurant, BBQ Eel..."
"That will do nicely! So, when does this race begin?" Soun asked formally, his now stately manner banishing the oddness of his request.
"It actually is scheduled to begin quite soon! If you will follow us, we'll take you to the sign-up and starting lines!"
And soon afterwards...
There was an almost festival-like air at the starting line, where a wide variety of women of all shapes and sizes gathered. Firecrackers detonated in the sky overhead and local TV crews swept their cameras over the scene as an announcer's voice boomed from overhead speakers.
"Ladies and gentlemen! The Miss Martial Arts Takeout Race should be getting started at any moment now! As explained earlier, the first delivery girl to reach the randomly chosen destination and have her food consumed by the occupant is the winner! We'd tell you the rules, but the fact is... there aren't any! Hahahaha!"
"No rules racing?" Akane quipped dryly.
"Guess that's why there are girls with vehicles entering, too," Nabiki flatly added, casting a baleful glance at the array of rollerskates, bicycles, skateboards and scooters intermingled with the footsloggers like herself.
"You sure you'll be okay, Nabiki?" Ranma asked, glancing nervously between his fiancée and the crowd.
"Yes, Ranma, I'm sure - it's still just a race, after all. But even so, I don't know if I can outrun scooters," Nabiki admitted.
"If you're so worried, Ranma, why aren't you competing?" Akane asked, a small scowl on her face as she did so.
"Because he the prize, stupid," Shampoo muttered, though not so quietly that Akane failed to hear her.
"Hey!"
"She's got a point, Akane; it was a stroke of luck that Mr. Daikoku agreed to let you and Shampoo race as co-challengers, there's no way he would have agreed to four on one odds with 'Ranko' in play," Nabiki soothed her. "But between the three of us, we're certain to win!"
Akane cast a stink-eye at her unwanted Chinese house-guest, but then gave her elder sister a smile. "Yeah... don't worry, Nabiki, I won't let you down!" she promised her.
"That's my sister," Nabiki replied, smiling confidently. At the same time, she stole a surreptitious glance at the map again, making sure the address was firmly burned into her brain. 'Strange, why does that address seem familiar...?'
Her thoughts were cut off by a sudden clarion of trumpets blaring over the speakers. "Will all contestants come to the starting line, please!"
Nabiki hugged Ranma for luck, and then hurried to take her place on the starting line. A series of traditional delivery boxes were placed in a row across the line, one for each girl to carry, and the air crackled with anticipation as they awaited the announcement to begin.
"That's it girls, move in a little closer - wait, what's this?! It seems a young girl will be competing in her wedding dress! Very interesting..."
Three sisters - two by blood, one by declaration - turned to the gap in the line from which Kaori Daikoku had emerged, still clad in her shiromuku.
"Who does she think she is? Hmph," a disgusted Akane observed.
Kaori knelt at her box, quiet and patient. Then she reached out with one hand to clasp the handle of her box, and Nabiki felt a sudden tingling racing across her skin, a sense of foreboding that she couldn't explain.
"I have seen that grip before, ladies and gentlemen! I believe we are in for a treat!" squawked the announcer.
And that was when Kaori suddenly flung the delivery box high into the sky, the white container disappearing into the glare of the sun as she followed it with a mighty kiai. Her shiromuku was flung aside, the white kimono carried away on the breeze as the teenage girl twisted and twirled through the air, mingling acrobatic flips with powerful kick attacks before she curled into a ball and dropped to the ground once more, landing neatly on one foot and one knee. Head hanging down so her face was still hidden from view, she caught the descending delivery box on one upstretched finger, spinning it around like a basketball before tossing it upwards again with a flick of her wrist. This time, she let it fall towards the ground in front of her, only to catch it by the handle at the very last moment and then pointedly lift the sliding hatch at its front.
The interior of the box was completely immaculate.
"Not one delicious drop wasted! We're talking takeout on a scale unheard of, ladies and gentleman! We're talking a true clash of the delivery girls!"
"She's a martial artist?!" a stunned Nabiki blurted, the outburst going unnoticed amidst the shock and marvel playing out amongst the other contestants.
Unobserved by the Tendo girls, Shampoo merely glowered at this upstart rival who had ruined their day. 'I knew that man was far too eager to suggest this venue as a means to settle our argument. Well, two can play that game...'
Sure enough, Mr. Daikoku was laughing triumphantly, brandishing his ever-present fans with glee. "I'll bet you didn't know my girl is a master in the ancient art of Martial Arts Restaurant Takeout, eh?" he cackled to the stunned Soun and Ranma.
"Muh-Martial Arts Takeout?" Soun muttered, staring in horror at the still-kneeling girl.
"What the heck's that?" Ranma wondered aloud.
Smirking over his shoulder at them, Hideyoshi Daikoku replied, "Shame, everyone knows the ancient art of Martial Arts Takeout started out in the Aizuna Prefecture during the Edo period! There were fields and mountains to get through, and other kinds of perils - wild boars, bandits, cutthroats! Imagine the gratitude when that food arrived, still safe and piping hot - thus was the art of Martial Arts Takeout born!"
He thrust out a finger, dramatically pointing at Soun as he thundered, "You haven't got a chance, mister!"
Soun swallowed nervously, beads of sweat prickling his brow, whilst Ranma directed an evil eye at both of the supposed adults.
Nabiki felt like the world was twisting and turning under her feet. "Daddy..." she murmured, the word half a curse and half a prayer.
She nearly leapt out of her skin when somebody nudged her shoulder, twisting around to see Akane giving her a sympathetic look. "Hey, don't worry, Nabiki; you've got me and Shampoo here. We'll make sure you win, I promise!"
"That right!" Shampoo chimed in.
Whilst it wasn't enough to totally ease the doubt gnawing at her heart, Nabiki still managed to dredge up a sincerely thankful smile and a grateful nod for their efforts.
"Ready?!" came the thundering voice of the announcer, and the three representatives of the Tendo Dojo quickly turned back to their designated boxes.
Nabiki stole this moment to take a good look at her rival for Ranma's hand. Long brown hair cascaded down Kaori's back, with two streamers that ran in front of her ears, not too dissimilar to Shampoo's hair style. She was clad in a practical-looking blue top and red pants, although the distance prevented Nabiki from really making out anything about the girl's figure.
"Set?!"
Kaori finally lifted her head, turning and looking right at Nabiki. Icy blue-gray eyes stared into Nabiki's soul, whilst luscious lips curved into a confident smirk.
'Crap, she's cute too!' Nabiki mentally lamented. 'Why couldn't she take more after her dad?'
A gong was struck, the brazen note echoing through the street as the announcer shouted, "Go!" and there was no more time for thought - only action!
Onlookers cheered and balloons filled the sky as the contestants took off, charging down the hill as they began their journey to the destination. Nabiki powered forward, calling on her unwanted training under Genma to push her body in a way that would have been unthinkable a few months ago, but without pushing so hard as to burn out before the race was really underway. All the while, she kept glancing over at Kaori, certain that somebody who practiced something called "Martial Arts Takeout" wouldn't be content with merely racing.
A wise precaution, as barely a few minutes into the race, Kaori struck; she leapt into the air and made an aerial sidekick, right at the head of Akane, who had the misfortune of being closest to her - but she had underestimated the youngest Tendo, who backstepped at just the right moment, causing the blow to instead land on the helmeted head of a scooter-riding contestant, knocking her to the ground in an unconscious heap that several of the girls behind them proceeded to trip over.
"Cheater!" Akane yelled instinctively.
"No rules, right?" Kaori retorted, before suddenly making a sideways shoulder barge at Akane. The youngest Tendo effortlessly wove around this attack, but it turned out to be a trick to bring Kaori within range of attacking Nabiki herself. Instincts that had received unexpected sharpening since the Saotomes arrived saved Nabiki, letting her narrowly pull her delivery box out of the way of Kaori's jabbing finger. Instead, it slammed into the box mounted on the back of another girl's bicycle, smashing the box into a crumpled mess so that its lid blew open - needless to say, the food inside was a total wreck.
"How did you?!" Nabiki started, biting back an instinctive curse.
Kaori simply smirked triumphantly. "Daikoku School of Martial Arts special technique: It's Fast or It's Free!" she cried, before jabbing at Nabiki again and again.
The middle Tendo scrambled, shamelessly using the other competitors around her as unwitting human shields. Boxes exploded, sending ramen, donburi, okonomiyaki, pizza, curry, and other foodstuffs splattering across the ground, stunned or unconscious women falling in Kaori's wake. Unfortunately, the other contestants quickly realized what was happening and gave the duo a wide berth, even voluntarily falling back to add more distance between them and the combatants.
"You can't escape me this time!" Kaori cried triumphantly, arm drawn back in preparation for another box-shattering strike...
Which was when a streamer of ramen noodles suddenly came whipping through the air and coiled around Kaori's wrist like a snake, holding her fast.
"What?!" cried both girls at the same time, their startled eyes tracing the noodles to their origin.
Shampoo smirked triumphantly, clutching the tail-end of the noodle-whip in a pair of chopsticks, "You try that on somebody who know your tricks!" she jeered at Kaori. "Hurry, Nabiki! Shampoo take care of her!"
Nabiki didn't need to be told twice. "Thank you, Shampoo, I'll owe you one!" she called, even as she ran for her life down the hill.
"Shampoo hold you to that!"
"Interfering wench! Where did you learn the Ramen Round-Up Noodle Noose?" Kaori snarled, trying to yank the ramen lariat away from her Chinese assailant.
Unfortunately, Shampoo was strong and well-prepared for a fight, leading to the two simply playing tug-o-war with it. The Joketsuzoku grinned savagely back at her before boasting, "Great-grandmother teach Shampoo how to do Martial Arts Takeout!"
Kaori charged into range with Shampoo, hoping to take advantage of the slackness of the noodle lariat binding her wrist, but Shampoo simply hopped backwards to keep the tension up. The two combatants began to circle each other, even as they unthinkingly continued to race down the hill. The other contestants in the race thundered forward, trying to sweep past and around Kaori and Shampoo, but the two martial artists moved with incredible speed, and easily stayed at the forefront of the pack.
One luckless girl on a skateboard accidentally clotheslined herself on the noodles, momentum flinging her ride further ahead downhill. As it clattered and rolled along, Nabiki spotted it from the corner of her eye and impulsively leapt onto it. She wobbled dangerously for a moment, before she managed to find her balanced, and began to propel herself faster with carefully judged steps.
'I never was into these things... but I'll take any edge I can get! I won't lose this race! Akane...Shampoo... thank you both! Hmm... I think I know a shortcut... I just wish I knew why that address seemed so familiar...'
Meanwhile, at the impromptu finishing line...
"So, I am to consume the meal presented by the first girl to arrive here? I see... very well; I accept this honor. Good day to you."
The telephone clicked softly as Tatewaki Kuno placed it back on its hook, before sighing softly. 'In truth, I could use the distraction, as plebian as this contest sounds. To think that I had thought Ranma Saotome a worthy rival, and that blue-haired girl a potential ally - fie on them both! How dare they strike at my sister, twisted as she may have been before they wove their dark magics over her... oh, they shall rue what they did!'
He clenched his fist as the determination to avenge his sister washed over him. Then he relaxed again, allowing his shoulders to droop. 'But that is for the future... at least that deceitful rogue Ryoga Hibiki no longer darkens my home with his presence... even if my poor twisted sister is mourning his absence. And at least this contest provides some small distraction. Alas, if only it were Akane Tendo who was on her way to my door with some of her doubtlessly wonderful home cooking - truly, that would brighten my day...'
Back with the racers...
In later recollections, Nabiki would admit to remembering very little about the race itself. It was basically just a panic-fueled blur of streets and addresses, hearing the cacophony of Shampoo and Kaori's own private duel behind her and the way they inadvertently wiped out the other would-be contestants as collateral damage whilst exchanging flurries of narutomaki fish cake slices, barrages of chopsticks flung like darts, and volleys of those delivery-box exploding finger jabs. Even the constant commentary from the race's announcer as they drove along with the local news vans was just an incomprehensible blur in her ears as she drove herself towards her final destination.
'Finally! I made it! I'm almost there!' Nabiki cried out in the privacy of her own thoughts as the address marker she'd been praying to find finally came into view. Her legs were starting to burn from the effort of staying out of range of Shampoo and Kaori. It was... well, it was larger than she had expected, but right now, she couldn't care less.
Suddenly, Nabiki's subconscious screamed at her, and she impulsively leapt from the skateboard - and just in the nick of time, as a chopstick, of all the insane things, flew through the air and slammed into the skateboard with such strength that it smashed the board to pieces.
'I may actually have to thank that gluttonous idiot if I get out of this alive!' A part of Nabiki noted. The rest of her was preoccupied with dashing through the steel gate and slamming it shut behind her before she sprinted up the pathway and towards the looming mansion.
Kaori simply sniffed and sprang from the ground to the top of the stone fence that loomed over the mansion in a single easy motion. She smirked down at her Chinese opponent... only for the confident grin to be wiped from her face as Shampoo simply headbutted the steel gates clean off of their hinges and continued without even losing her pace!
"What the hell are you made of?!" the Daikoku heiress complained, even as she scrambled to try and catch up.
"Three thousand years Chinese Amazon history!" Shampoo spat back, flinging out the latest in a series of Fishcake Blizzards she had used to try and slip away from her pernicious pest of a would-be rival.
Unfortunately, this one was no more effective than any of the other ones, and it exhausted the last of Shampoo's supply of spare narutomaki to boot. Kaori deftly wove through the spiraling cakes, slapping them aside with deft blows of her hand, and then launched another chopstick as a dart attack at Shampoo.
The Chinese Amazon dodged this assault, and sprang backwards in great hops, trying to keep at bay and buy Nabiki more time.
As for Nabiki, she had reached the door and was pounding on it desperately. "Delivery! Yoshinobu beef donburi!" she cried out, even as she beat her knuckles raw on the door.
She could have fainted from relief when the door swung open and her "customer" was revealed... and then fainted from surprise when she saw who it was.
"Kuh-Kuno!?"
"Nabiki Tendo?" Tatewaki responded, looking almost as startled as Nabiki felt. "What brings you to my doorstep? I have no time for - you!"
Before Nabiki could reply, Kuno's outraged glare had locked onto something beyond her. With an uncharacteristic snarl of rage he pushed past her, his ever-present bokken slapping into his hand as he charged straight into the melee of Kaori and Shampoo.
"Vile foreign harlot! Taste my righteous vengeance!"
Kaori and Shampoo actually stopped in mid-strike as Kuno's bellowed challenge reached their ears, the two girls blinking in surprise and staring incomprehensibly at Kuno - right up until he swung his sword at Shampoo.
"What you doing!?" the Chinese Amazon squawked in shock, narrowly dodging the attack.
"For my sister's virtue, you shall be punished!" Kuno bellowed, striking again and again, fury lending his blows a swiftness that Nabiki had never seen before.
Shampoo did her best, truly, she did. But the running battle with Kaori had been long and hard, and Kuno's assault left her hard-pressed indeed. When Kuno's sword came scything through the air at just the right angle, Shampoo instinctively tried to deflect it, having forgotten in the heat of the moment that she wasn't wielding her trusty chui, but instead carrying the precious delivery box that allowed her to compete. Such cheap material stood no chance against Kuno's attack, and the box split neatly in half, sending mangled pottery and broth flying through the air in the bokken's wake.
"You stupid fool!" Shampoo shrieked, then ducked as Kuno swiped at her head with his sword.
"Treacherous witch!" he spat, continuing to harry her with his wooden blade.
"Kuno, you idiot, leave her alone!" Nabiki cried, trying to intervene... only to be stopped dead in her tracks as something hot and slimy suddenly wound its way around her neck, catching her in a vice-like grip that left her gasping for air.
Kaori laughed triumphantly. "You didn't think your sister was the only one who knew how to perform the Ramen Round-Up Noodle Noose, did you? Now give it up, girl! Ranma will be mine!"
"No...he...won't!" Nabiki spat, even as she clawed desperately at the noodles wrapped around her throat. Unfortunately, they refused to give way, clinging together more like woven steel fiber than simple boiled pasta. 'How can noodles be so damn tough?! I'm in trouble..'
"Nabiki!" Shampoo cried in dismay, but found herself unable to go to her co-wife's aid with an angry Kuno in her way.
Kaori simply laughed again. "You might as well give up! WIth the Noodle Noose around your neck, it's all over - if you won't give me Ranma, then I'll choke you out and take him!"
The announcer, of course, was loving this display of desperate combat, and most of the audience was as well... with two rather obvious exceptions.
"Waah! My baby girl! Ranma, you've got to help her!" Soun wailed, though fortunately not loudly enough to be heard over the cries of shock and excitement from the rest of the crowd who had followed the racers here.
"I can't!" Ranma protested, even as his heart clenched tight in his chest at the sight of Nabiki with Kaori's ramen rope wound around her neck.
"What do you mean, you can't?!" Soun roared, grabbing Ranma by the collar.
"Hey, I don't like it any more than you do! But if I interfere, that's cheating, and the Daikokus will win by default!" Ranma protested. Then something in the corner of his eye caught his attention, and he grinned as he realized what it was. "But don't count Nabiki out yet!"
For, having gone unnoticed by both Shampoo and Kaori during their savage duel, Akane had soldiered along, determined to help her sister. And whilst she hadn't quite been able to keep up with the other three, they hadn't left her in the dust either; she had finally arrived, and she took in the scene before her - Kuno dueling a desperate-looking Shampoo, and Kaori cackling as she held Nabiki in her noodly deathgrip, the middle Tendo teetering as she fought to stave off unconsciousness - with a look of despair.
'What do I do? What do I do?' she wondered desperately. 'Wait, the announcer guy said that the winner is the first girl who gets her food eaten by the guy at the finish line...'
She swallowed against the feeling of bile rising in her crop. '...Damn you, Ranma, you better appreciate this!'
Akane took a deep breath and cried out, "Kuno! If you'll eat this teriyaki eel, I'll go on a date with you!"
Well, those were the magic words! Akane yelped as Kuno nearly bowled her over, staring into her eyes with the fevered gaze of a madman. "Akane Tendo, doth you speak truly?"
"Yes, yes! Just shut up and eat it already!" Akane snapped, ripping open the delivery box and holding the plate of seafood out to her loathed would-be paramour.
Kuno needed no further encouragement; to Akane's shock, he didn't even bother grabbing the complimentary chopsticks, he just began stuffing the strips of marinated eel flesh into his mouth with his fingers, gobbling down the rice as an afterthought.
'And I thought Ranma and his dad could eat quickly!' Akane noted, with a mixture of awe and disgust.
She didn't have long to dwell on that thought as Kuno choked down the final mouthful, tossed the bowl aside, and grabbed her in a passionate embrace. "Oh, Akane Tendo! It was delicious! But it pales in comparison to the promise of our dining together!"
"Ew! Not with your face covered in teriyaki sauce!" Akane protested, trying to hold Kuno at arm's length.
"Unbelievable! With a surprising last moment effort, Akane Tendo has stolen the match! The winner of the Miss Martial Arts Takeout Race is Akane Tendo, representing BBQ Eel!"
The announcer's roaring declaration reached even Kaori's ears, and she promptly dropped the chopsticks holding the noodle noose in shock. "I-I lost?!" she protested.
Without its mistress' touch, the noodle noose came apart, streamers of pasta falling down Nabiki's shoulders and front as she gasped for blessed air. She wanted to say something witty and pithy, but in the face of her near-strangulation, nothing particularly clever was coming to mind.
"Nabiki!"
And then she had an armful of Shampoo, and she lost her chance to say anything. Particularly because she felt like her ribcage was going to break if the Chinese Amazon didn't stop squeezing her so tightly.
"You such brave girl, Nabiki! Much honor you win this day!" Shampoo declared, affectionately nuzzling her cheek against Nabiki's.
"Shampooo... choking me..." the middle Tendo gritted out.
Shampoo blinked, then quickly released her grip on her reluctant spouse. "Oops. Shampoo sorry," she said, smiling sheepishly as a faint blush dusted her features.
Nabiki couldn't quite bring herself to scold the Chinese Amazon. And then she heard her name being called, and she turned to see Ranma sprinting towards her. She smiled hugely and welcomed his embrace, much gentler than Shampoo's, and nuzzled in as close as she could. Even when she felt Shampoo wrap herself around the both of them, she didn't mind, content to simply bathe in the triumph of knowing that, even if she hadn't exactly won the race, there was no denying who was the victor in the far more important matter of settling who got Ranma's heart...
That evening...
It had taken several hours to sort things out with the announcer and arrange for their winnings. During that time, the Daikokus had shown themselves to at least be honorable about keeping their word; every inch the good sports, father and daughter had acknowledged their loss and politely withdrawn, letting the triumphant trio of racers, accompanied by Soun and Ranma, return at long last to the Tendo Dojo.
Storm clouds were filling the dusk sky as they entered the genkan, pausing only to remove their shoes before entering the house proper, with the beaming, chuckling Soun leading the way.
"Kasumi! We're home!" he called out... only to be greeted by silence. "Kasumi? Kasumi, where are you?"
Naturally, the first place they checked was the kitchen, which was where Ranma spotted the note on the refrigerator. "Hey, check this out," he told the others, even as he plucked the note from its holding place and began scanning it.
"Gone to do some last minute grocery shopping. Mr. Saotome came with me to help, and because he got a letter of challenge. Huh. A letter of challenge for my old man? Bet it was just an excuse to get out of the house," Ranma mused.
"Does it say where this alleged challenge is taking place?" Nabiki asked.
"Some vacant lot - it's not all too far," Ranma replied, checking the letter again. Then he froze as a hand suddenly fell on his shoulders, the fingers squeezing tightly as a wave of dread washed over him.
"I see... well, in that case, son, perhaps you had best go and retrieve my little girl before your father puts her into harm's way, hmm?" Soun suggested, menace dripping from his words despite his light tone, his battle aura flickering around him like ghostly fire.
"Daddy!" Nabiki protested, but it was to no avail.
"Now!" Soun howled, in full-blown Protective Daddy Mode after everything that had happened.
Ranma yelped and fled for the genkan as fast as his feet could carry him, Shampoo's cry of "Airen!" and Nabiki's own "Ranma!" trailing after him, ignored in the face of Soun's wrath.
"Honestly, daddy!" Nabiki protested.
Soun simply ignored her. "After all the trouble he's caused today, Genma better not drag my Kasumi into even more of it," he muttered.
The three teens shared a look of mutual exasperation. "Akane, you stay here with him; Shampoo and I will go and make sure Ranma gets back safe."
"We will?" a confused Shampoo asked.
"You really want to trust Kaori's word that she and her dad won't come sniffing back around?" Nabiki asked, finger gingerly tracing the bruising around her neck.
The angry growl and the way Shampoo's flowing mane of purplish-blue hair visibly bristled said enough, and the two girls quickly followed after their mutual husband-to-be.
Meanwhile, at the empty lot...
Kasumi stood at the fence, wincing as lightning flashed and thunder crackled in the dark clouds above. The light was dimming fast, and the shadows were starting to swallow the two figures standing at the center of the vacant lot.
Genma was easy enough to make out, tall and bulky as he was, clad in the faded white of his ever-present gi. His opponent was smaller and darker; a handsome young boy with long, flowing hair, clad in a blue shirt with the sleeves rolled up and long black pants, a bandolier slung over his shoulder and what looked like a giant metal spatula on his back.
It was this strange youth who broke the silence first. "Genma Saotome... well, whaddya know?" he observed darkly.
Genma looked puzzled, one meaty hand curling around his chin. "Hello? Have we met somewhere before?" he wondered aloud.
"Y'got some nerve!" barked the stranger, who drew the giant spatula from his back with a flourish. He began to charge across the grass, shouting, "I'm the child you left behind, remember?! Ukyo!"
Genma reeled back in visible horror. "U-Ukyo?! No, it can't be you!"
"Your number's up, 'pops'!" Ukyo cried, leaping into the air as, with perfect dramatic timing, a thunderbolt crashed through the sky above, lighting up their makeshift arena in brilliant white...
Chapter End & Closing Notes
Okay, let me get the most important thing out of the way first: Mr. Daikoku's first name is never given in canon, to the best of my knowledge. But, I thought it would be easier to read if I gave him one to refer to him by, instead of just calling him variations of "Mr. Daikoku" and "Kaori's dad" all the time. So, I called him Hideyoshi, meaning, roughly, "Excellent Good Luck", and fitting his theme of being named after one of the Seven Gods of Luck.
...Alright, alright, I'll answer the real question you guys have: why am I introducing Ukyo so soon? The long and short of is it that, due to how the canon underutilizes Ukyo to the point she is almost superfluous, and I say this as somebody who actually likes Ukyo, an AU fic like this has to make a choice when it comes to Ukyo - namely, is she going to be used, or not. And if she's going to be used, realistically, she needs to be brought on earlier than in canon, simply because she doesn't have the "opening" of canon Ranma/Akane to exploit. If need be, I can elaborate on this in the next chapter's endnotes, but suffice it to say that I have a plan.