The desert stars had met their end. The delicate white petals had fried down to their shriveled steams in the dry sunlight, and Jay watched as the last flower fell down to the scorched sand below. The bright, unforgiving Mojave sun boiled everything in its wake during the hot, stretched days of summer and every year Jay watched the petals bloom and fall.

The school bell rang nearby and Jay looked away from the flowers and began to pack up his farming tools. He didn't want to see the other children, didn't want to hear them giggle at his dirty clothes and mud caked nails. Every day the children stayed behind after school, filling the air with laughter and games, but Jay wasn't as lucky a child as they were, and so he headed straight home after work each day.

A laugh bubbled from another child through the hot, Mojave air and Jay stole a glance their way. "What are you doing?" Jay wanted to ask, "What do you talk about? What makes you laugh?"

Willowdane was a small, lonesome town that lay nestled between two mountains in the Nevada desert, it was where newcomers only visited if they were lost or dying and tumbleweeds outnumbered the inhabitance two-to-one. It was a place that no one ever left and no one ever came to, so Jay didn't have a long walk home. There was one main road that stretched through town, and Jay was walking down it when someone stopped him.

"Hey, wait up!"

Jay paused and looked over his shoulder, where a girl with short braided hair was running to catch up with him. She had a couple heavy books tucked under her arm and she shifted to grab them before they slid to the ground.

He slowed his walk and waited for the girl as a flurry of dusty air blew past and he lifted a hand to shield his eyes.

"Hi, Jay!" She squealed breathlessly through a sky wide smile. The freckles that were splattered across her face seemed much stronger in the sunlight and Jay squinted at her beneath the blanket of harsh sunlight.

"Hi." Jay said quietly, feeling his stomach turn and shrink with each second. He couldn't remember her name.

She pushed a few stray hairs from her eyes and smiled, "Glad that's over."

Jay frowned and hitched his pack of farming tools a bit higher onto his broad shoulders, "What do you mean?"

The girl laughed nervously. "Uh school? School's over."

"Oh… right." Jay said, his voice distant as he tried to focus on the conversation. He met her gaze and shrugged. "Ain't you going back tomorrow though?"

There was an awkward pause and she cleared her throat. "Well yeah… hey, where are you headed?"

"Home." Jay answered, his response had come out sharper than he had intended, however she seemed unfazed. This had never happened before, the other children usually ignored him and he didn't know what he was supposed to do.

Jay felt a pit forming in his stomach. He felt cornered, trapped. He felt like a bug that had been caught and placed under a violating inspection for some confidential reason.

"Oh, well why don't you stay with us today? We're all gonna play a game." The girl smiled at him, this time more shyly.

"I can't," Jay began. "I have to get home to my brother."

The girl shifted from one foot to the other and looked back at the crowd of school children behind her. One of them had retrieved an old ball and had started kicking it against a nearby rock. The pulsing sound grated on Jay's ears as the students stared at him.

Jay looked down at his feet and then forced himself to look at her eyes. The other farmers had scolded him about how it wasn't polite to look anywhere but someone's eyes when they were talking to you. Her eyes were grey and foggy-looking in the sun and they reminded Jay of little mothballs.

"Thanks for the offer, though." Jay offered and when she said nothing he was on his way again.

Jay hurried down the road to where the small ranch house where he lived was waiting.

As soon as Jay crossed the threshold into his home he heard the familiar sound of his little brother crying loud, shrill cries that sounded far more distressed than usual. "Riley?" Jay called out with a frown and rushed into the room he shared with his brother.

Riley looked up at Jay and released another cry in response. He was sitting alone on the floor, his small fists were clenched tight and his face had turned a brilliant shade of red.

"Riley! What's wrong?" Jay asked and he gently scooped his baby brother up in his arms. Riley breathed in shakily and released another ear-shattering cry, and Jay pulled him close and rocked him gently.

Jay felt his heart clench with sorrow and guilt. If he hadn't been out working this wouldn't have happened. He scolded himself for thinking his father would stay with Riley, even know he had promised. Riley's crying still rang throughout the room and Jay rested his cheek against the top of Riley's head. "I'm so sorry. I should've been here."

He stood for a moment unsure of what to do as Riley screeched into his shoulder.

"Hey, come on." Jay said softly, "I got you, I'm here."

Riley looked up at Jay through red swollen eyes and Jay smiled at him. "I'm here buddy, I'll always be here."

Jay felt a wave of heat rise in his chest, a collection of anger and sadness and not being enough to keep him safe. It burned up to his cheeks and he felt hot tears slowly collect in his eyes when he looked at Riley. Jay swallowed heavily.

"Are you hungry?" He asked gently and carried Riley to their dingy kitchen. Jay grabbed a small container of baby food and sat down with Riley in his lap. Jay moved to reach for a nearby spoon, but Riley had his arms wrapped tightly around his neck and it was difficult to maneuver.

Just as Riley had begun to calm the door flew open with a slam and jittered on its broken hinge. Riley jolted up in Jay's arms and began to cry again, and Jay narrowed his eyes slightly as his father stumbled in and a sharp, daunting tension filled the room. For a moment they stared at each other in silence until Riley babbled against him and Jay felt hot anger push his stomach again.

"Where were you?" Jay demanded. "He was all by himself."

"I got busy with something." His father answered in his low, monotone voice. He was a wide, burly man with a heavy jaw and a long scar that drew a jagged line down the side of his face. The air around him was always heavy and intimidating and Jay felt the need to brace himself whenever he spoke to him.

"But you promised me-"

"That's enough." His father ordered, his voice suddenly low and threatening. "I told you I had something to take care of."

Jay went silent for a moment as if calculating the risk of pushing further. His father was always frightening to talk to, but thought of Riley alone and crying and held his fathers gaze. "…You promised."

He leaned down and grabbed Riley's face with a large coarse hand and Jay fought the urge to pull Riley away.

"He looks fine to me."

"He was on the floor when I got home from work. He was crying his eyes out." Jay fought to try and contain the bitter resentment he felt. He wanted to yell, he wanted to scream, but he knew better, Jay always knew better.

His father moved past him and into his room, slamming the door behind him and leaving Jay sitting alone with Riley in the dim light of the run down kitchen.

Jay sighed his way through another surge of animosity and gazed down at Riley who was staring at him with big, curious eyes. He stood and stepped outside to the porch and looked out across the miles of road before him.

Riley babbled against him as Jay hoisted Riley a little higher on his hip and sat down on the porch steps.

"See those?" Jay asked and gestured up to the stars. Riley looked up with wide eyes and Jay smiled.

"I heard people used to go up there. They'd get in these rockets and just fly away."

Something moved from across the road and Jay noticed the girl from before, sitting on the steps of the community house in town. A light was on from inside that illuminated her and made her look like she was glowing. She had drawn her legs to her chest and was leaning her head sideways against her knees.

Their eyes met even through the distance between them and after a pause she slowly raised a hand and offered a gentle wave, a shy smile on her face.

Jay felt an urge to just turn and go back inside, but he felt an unexpected tug inside and instead he steeled himself and offered a halfhearted wave back. He saw her beam at him in response.

She turned and flounced back up the stairs. Just before she entered her home she turned and looked at him again and Jay felt his face tinge red. She disappeared behind the door and Jay was once again alone in the night.

He tilted his head up to the vast expanse of sky and sighed. Connie. Her name was Connie.