Semper Fi
A Law & Order: SVU FanFiction
Author: itsamandything
A/N: songs for this chapter: Out of the woods by Taylor swift, I'll follow you by shinedown, Happiness by the fray, there goes my everything by Kane brown and Messy by Chase Rice
Olivia jolted up and panicked when she felt Elliot's side of the bed cold. She quickly got out of bed and went into Noah's room and couldn't find him either. She found her phone on the counter seeing no missed calls.
"Liv?" Elliot called stepping out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist.
"Where's Noah?" She asked, trying to quell the panic.
"With Amaro until tomorrow. Zara was begging for some Noah time." He said to her and pulled her in for a hug. "Everything's okay." He said gently kissing her hair.
"I was having a nightmare and I just got spooked I guess." She said, relief in her voice. "So this play date was Zara's idea?" She asked looking up at him.
"Liv we have the day off. This is the first off day since Noah's birthday last month. Kid free." He hinted leaning down to kiss her. She smiled into the kiss and removed the towel from his waist.
He backed them to the bed stopping when her knees hit the edge. He lifted the t-shirt she was wearing and dropped it on the floor. He tangled one hand in her hair, the other one brushing over the sensitive spot on the back of her neck, near her shoulder, the one that gives her chills.
Olivia fell back onto the bed, her legs falling open. Elliot wasted no time guiding himself into her. He lifted her hands above her head, intertwining them with his. Her legs wrapped around him, her feet pressing into his ass as he pounded into her.
"Fuck." She yelled, his hands crushing hers. "Don't stop Elliot." She groaned feeling herself reaching the summit towards the cliff. Olivia's eyes rolled back in her head as one of his hands released her and moved between their sweat slicked bodies and in between her folds. He circled her clit and she moaned again causing him to smirk.
Olivia clenched her walls around him and Elliot's smirk faded. "Evil woman." He groaned in her ear gently biting down on her shoulder. Olivia snaked her free arm around his neck, her fingers running through his short cropped hair. They came together calling out each others names both trying to catch their breaths. Elliot turned them to his side, where she was halfway laying on top of him. "I love you so much." He told her.
"I wonder," she started to say but stopped.
"What?"
"What would've happened if we had gotten together after Gitano?" She asked. "Would we still be like this barely able to keep our hands off each other?" She wondered.
"Oh definitely. There's no question. I'm never going to get enough of you." He said gently smacking her ass and she squealed.
"Before everything with Lewis I thought about Noah so much. I wanted to take him but Brian didn't want kids. His idea of going out was to a sports bar. He and I would've ended anyways. It was inevitable. I was trying to be someone I wasn't and you know I always wanted to be a mom." She explained. "I know I could've done this alone but I'm glad I'm doing it with you."
"Ditto." He said to her placing a sloppy kiss on her forehead. "Liv I was thinking about something." He mused.
"What's up?" She asked him.
"I keep thinking about what it would've been like to have kids of our own."
"Me too. I thought about it a lot. What if we crossed the blurred lines even just for a night and that happened. I mean it could've. It's how Maureen and Eli made it."
"I know. I don't even know why I'm thinking about this. More children. I mean Noah's barely a year. Eli is in kindergarten almost and here I am thinking about a little girl that looks just like you." He told her and she looked up at him through her lashes.
"El, what are you thinking?" She asked.
"What if we broached the idea of a surrogate?" He asked her.
"I'm not against it. But let's see what happens with Noah. I don't want to throw a new baby on him especially if we do get to finalize the adoption. I'm not saying no to the idea though." She explained and before she could say anything else her stomach growled.
"Let's feed you before you turn into a grouch." He said and she tried not to smile while she playfully swatted him.
"I'm not as bad as you." She reminded him.
Olivia finished the paperwork once latest case. She walked to the window and saw Elliot and Amanda grilling a perp. She didn't worry as much about his rage with Amanda. "I never thanked you for keeping Noah the other day." She said as he handed her his DD5 on the case he'd just finished.
"It wasn't a problem. It keeps her from asking me when she can get a sibling. So he's welcome anytime." Nick told her. He looked into the box, his gaze focused on Amanda. "You know she's with Carisi right?"
"I had a feeling. You know sometimes things just happen. It took me almost 15 years to get what I have now and I don't regret it but sometimes I wish that I'd done something sooner." She explained.
"I'd heard the rumors about you both. I mean hell it was all anyone talked about. You guys were, still are a legend. Liv I don't know many people who would risk everything for just their partner. I knew he loved you as soon as he showed up when you were missing. I also knew Cassidy didn't stand a chance and just between us I would've helped Stabler if for some idiotic reason you'd went back to Cassidy."
"Oh really?" She asked cocking an eyebrow.
"Most definitely." He told her with a smile.
"We have a confession?" Barba asked walking into the office.
"Almost." Olivia told him.
"Liv just so you know Lewis's attorneys are trying to file motions compelling Elliot to testify." Barba said.
"You're going to handle it right?"
"I am but you're going to have to testify. What's your plan making Lewis look deranged?" Barba asked her.
"I don't know. It's not like I have a list of questions his attorney is going to ask me Rafa." She snapped and Nick closed the door.
"Olivia if his attorney goes with that line of questioning the only way to get around it will be to purger yourself." He said sternly. "I never thought I'd be having a conversation like this." He lamented.
"Me either. I'll do what I have to do. You don't need to know anything about it just in case. I just need a heads up on the witness list." She told him. "How much longer can he stall?"
"Hell if I know. He's using his attorney to his advantage. How he managed to get another pretty female lawyer is beyond me." Barba muttered. "These are extraordinary circumstances Liv. I get that but if this goes your way," he started to say but she silenced him.
"You don't have to say it. I won't make a habit out of it I promise." She reassured him. They turned their attention back to the perp just in time to hear him confess. She saw Elliot's smirk before turning to walk out of the room. "Nice." She said to him and he fought the urge to chastely kiss her.
"Rollins will make sure he gets to arraignment." He said to Barba.
"Good deal. Let's see what this guys lawyer has to say." He said with a smirk and walked out of the office.
"I'm gonna head out if you guys don't need anything else." Nick said and Elliot shook his head. "See you guys tomorrow." He said before leaving the office.
"So what do we do about Rollins and Carisi?" He asked her.
"Let's see how it goes." She simply said to him as he sat in his chair and pulled her into his lap. "I'm serious. I knew it was coming. I'm glad it happened sooner rather than later."
"What we're the only ones allowed to slow burn?" He mused.
"No it's not that. We took a very long time El. We were both miserable for the most part. I just didn't want to see that happen to them." She explained.
"They can have the latitude. Not a lot though." He warned. "How did you even know it would happen?"
"I had a feeling." She shrugged. "El we need to have a discussion about the trial." She told him and he stiffened up.
"I know. Just uh not right now. We are going to be under a lot of scrutiny come time for the trial and I just want to enjoy the peace we have right now. Is that so wrong?" He asked her.
"No it's not. I love you El." She told him. "I have to go for that stupid X-ray." She muttered against his shoulder.
"We need to know if your collar bone is healed completely." He reminded her. "Let's get this over with." He told her and she stood up followed by Elliot.
Olivia's foot nervously tapped against the linoleum floor. "How much longer?" She groaned. She jumped when the exam room door opened. "What's going on doctor?" She asked.
"Sergeant Benson." He said closing the door. "As you know we have to do a pregnancy test before any x ray just to be safe. Sergeant you're pregnant." He told her and Olivia's mouth fell open. "I have a feeling this is unexpected." He told her.
"To say the least." She told him after taking a breath. "So what's next?"
"You need to see a high risk obstetrician and begin taking prenatal vitamins immediately. From the physical exam your collar bone seems fine. That's as good as it's going to get for now. I'll have my nurse get you a list of obstetricians and we can go from there." He told her.
"Holy shit." She said as he led her from the room. Elliot was sitting in the waiting room keeping Noah occupied. She smiled when she saw them.
"I'm assuming good news since the doctor isn't limping." He said and she let out a giggle. He stood and placed Noah in his stroller and they walked out of the office. "Olivia what's going on?" He asked her.
"I'm pregnant." She blurted as they stepped out onto the street. "You have some super magic sperm." She muttered.
"You're sure?" He asked her.
"I couldn't have my X-ray because of a positive pregnancy test. They're referring me to a high risk obstetrician." She told him.
"Wow. Um okay. We can do this Liv if you want."
"If I want?" She asked him.
"Liv this is your choice. I know this is going to be hard. I also remember what happened with Eli's birth. I'm happy and excited but I won't put you at risk Liv. I almost lost you once. I won't let that happen again." He told her.
"We can do this. I mean we were just talking about surrogacy." She reminded him.
"And that didn't put you at risk Liv. Pregnancy over 40 isn't a cakewalk. I won't lose you. I'm not ready for that Liv." He said pulling her close to him.
"I will ride the desk. I will be okay El. I promise." She reassured him. "We got this El." She promise him. "You know you're Catholic right?" She reminded him.
"I know but you're more important than religion Liv. If you decided against it I'd go to confession every day for the rest of my life and be okay with it. I promise you." He told her as they rounded the corner to their building. "I love you." He said pulling her in for a kiss.
Olivia danced around the subject. She had to. What was she supposed to say to the squad? She cited backlogs of paperwork as the reason why she wasn't spending as much time in the field taking calls. "Liv what's going on?" She heard Fin ask her.
"I'm sorry. What was the question?" She asked shaking off the cobwebs.
"Is it the trial?" He asked coming into the office and taking a seat. "I've never seen you like this."
"There's just a lot going on right now Fin. I'm fine. I promise." She told him.
"So you'd tell me if I needed to beat Stablers ass?" He asked her and she smiled, trying to stifle a laugh.
"I promise. You don't need to kick his ass. Besides we both know I'd do it." She told Fin with a wink. "I promise I'll tell you what's going on when I can Fin." She said to him. "Don't worry. Everything's okay." She told him.
"If you're sure."
"I'm sure. Go home. It's all good." She told him. He nodded before walking out of the office. She looked over into the interrogation room and saw Amanda and Carisi going toe to toe with a perp. She tore her gaze away and focused it on the photos on Elliot's desk. There were pictures of him with his kids then there were some from their first days home from the hospital then there were the ones from when they first brought Noah home and his first birthday. Her hands instinctively went to her stomach, feeling the small bloat. She couldn't help but smile even though she was worried.
"You almost ready?" She heard Elliot ask.
"Yeah. Just finishing up some paperwork. What did you want to do for dinner?" She asked him.
"Whatever you can tolerate." He teased and she just shook her head. "I will say thank god you can't have sushi." He sad happily and she glared at him.
"I can still get the fried sushi. I don't have to eat it raw." She grumbled.
"I'll follow you anywhere but I can't do sushi. Not happening." He said firmly and she let out a small laugh.
"I won't torture you with sushi. We could get hibachi to go though." She said and he grinned.
"Sounds like a plan." He said coming around to the side of the desk where she was and placed a hand on each side of her then leaning down to firmly kiss her on the lips. "We still haven't christened the interrogation room." He reminded her when they parted.
"Now I understand how you have so many kids." She retorted and he smirked.
"I don't seem to recall you complaining." He reminded her.
"Oh I'm not. Just imagine how many kids we would have by now." She told him and she shuddered. "We'd be the damn Duggar family." She muttered.
"Maybe this is twins." He said and she gave him a look.
"If this is twins no more. No surrogate and no adoption. I mean it." She warned him, giving him a small kiss. "God help us if this is twins." She groaned, leaning into Elliot.
"Let's go see this baby." He said pulling her up from the chair, clasping their hands. "I love you." He whispered and she smiled
"I love you too." She told him. She slipped her laptop in her bag and closed it and grabbed her purse. Before she could slip them on her shoulder Elliot grabbed them and she smirked. "Remind me to change to a hot pink bag tonight."
"I'll still carry it." He retorted. "You forget I was drug to the mall by Lizzie, Mo and Katie after I retired. I can handle it." He smirked.
"Have you told them yet?" She asked as they stepped onto the elevator. Before he could answer Fin stepped on. "I thought you left earlier?"
"I was waiting on someone to get off work." He answered.
"And when do I get to meet her?" Olivia asked him.
"When we finally disclose." He answered. "Yes she's a cop. No she's not in this precinct. She was my first partner. She reached out a few months ago after you were found Liv. She asked if I wanted to talk about it. It just happened." He told her.
"No judgment from me Fin or from Elliot. Did anything happen when you were partners?"
"Nah. Never even came close. But when we disclose maybe we can have dinner one night." Fin said as the elevator doors opened. "See you guys tomorrow." He said as they parted ways.
Elliot ushered Olivia into the doctors after after a short drive. "Hi I have an appointment. Name is Benson-Stabler." Olivia said handing over her ID and insurance card. The receptionist handed her the forms and took her cards to copy.
They sat down and Olivia's eyebrows raised as the forms. "Need some help?" He asked her.
"Nothing is off limits is it?" She asked incredulously as she started filling out the forms. Half an hour later they were taken back into the exam room. Olivia changed into the gown and groaned. "I know I shouldn't be nervous but these scars." She said and Elliot squeezed her hand.
"I'm right here. That part won't take long Liv. You got this." He said as the doctor entered the room.
"Hi Olivia. I'm Dr. Shane. So today we are going to do an ultrasound and some standard blood work. I understand this is your first pregnancy?" He asked and she nodded. "What about you dad?" He asked Elliot.
"No. I have five kids from a previous marriage." Elliot swiftly answered. "One pregnancy was twins." He added and Olivia glared at him.
"Well then. Let's take a look. So I understand that you both have a one year old?" He asked as he quickly did the breast exam and palpated Olivia's stomach.
"Yes. We are in the process of adopting him." Olivia answered.
"You guys will have a full house." He said motioning for Olivia to stay in her current position. "Okay this gel will be cold. But soon you'll see your baby." He explained and Elliot moved to stand by Olivia's head and took one of her hands in his. They watched and as the screen filled Elliot couldn't help but tear up. He quickly grabbed his phone and set it to video. He took a quick view on the ultrasound monitor then moved it to focus on Olivia who was enthralled with the ultrasound. "So by the looks of things you're roughly 7 weeks. I'm going to recommend that you take it easy Sergeant. I know this pregnancy wasn't planned. But there's nothing to say you can't have a healthy pregnancy at this age. I'm going to see you every week. This is just a precaution. But it's necessary. So we can set up the same time each week and go from there. But take it easy Sergeant. Hold out on the stress and I don't see any reason why you can't have a happy and healthy baby in a few months." He explained pulling the want off of her stomach. He handed her a towel to wipe off the gel. "I'm going to let you get dressed and I'll have my nursery you set up. I'll also have her print some ultrasound pictures for you both." He said before leaving the room.
An hour and a half later they were seated in the living room with Noah eating dinner. "About what you asked earlier. I figured that we would tell them all together. We are having dinner Saturday so we can do it then if you're up for it."
"Sounds like a plan." She said watching Noah play with his rice. "How are we going to do this?" She asked him. "I don't want to hide it from our friends but I don't want to tell anyone else until after the trial. I don't want it to be brought up by the defense for any reason."
"I understand. Well at least I'm your commanding officer so you've done your duty by telling me. I'll tell 1PP and we will make sure they keep it quiet. I will do whatever you want me to do."
"Thank you El. I just don't know how this happened. I mean I do but after everything else that's happened now this. I'm happy that it happened I just wish it had happened after the trial." She told him just then Noah flung a piece of chicken at her and she laughed. She picked it up from the floor along with a few grains of rice and walked over to Noah gently kissing him on the forehead and he giggled. She wiped his face with a napkin and handed him his cup of juice.
"Liv given this new development would you reconsider a plea?"
"No. Lewis doesn't get to stand up and say he raped me. I won't give him that." She said firmly.
"I'm just worried about the stress from the trial Liv."
"I get that. I do. But Lewis said he would always live in my head after what he did. I've proved him wrong so far. I want to continue doing it." She told him. Elliot came up behind her and wrapped his hands around her waist, pressing a kiss into her neck.
"Okay. But if the stress is too much I want you to back off from the trial Liv." He told her and she nodded. "All I want is you and Noah and the baby and my kids Liv. I want you all happy. I spent too much of my life miserable." He said and she smiled which caused Noah to giggle.
"Ma." He called out and Olivia stopped what she was doing. "Ma." He said again and she felt her eyes start to water.
"Oh sweet boy." She said to him, wiping the tears threatening to spill. She leaned down to kiss him on the cheek when Noah leaned forward and placed a hand on either side of her face, smooshing her cheeks. She ended up kissing him on the lips and he smiled when the camera shutter went off. "Can you say dada sweet boy?" She asked him and he giggled.
"Mama." He said and she smiled again.
"Let's get you cleaned up." She said to him. She went to grab him out of his high chair but Elliot was quicker.
"I'll give him a bath while you put all this up. You'll thank me later." He told her holding Noah on his hip and leaning down to give her a quick kiss.
Olivia cleaned up their dinner and put away the leftovers and cleaned up the kitchen. She went to the bathroom and leaned against the door watching Elliot play with Noah while he was in the bathtub. She snapped a couple of pictures then ran to grab the door. "Fin what's going on?" She asked as he walked inside with a woman she hadn't met yet.
"We talked about it and even though we haven't disclosed yet we wanted you to meet. This is Phoebe. Phoebe this is Olivia." Fin said and the ladies shook hands.
"Elliot will be out in a few minutes. He's giving Noah a bath," she explained.
"It's all good Liv. How is the little man?" Fin asked shutting the door behind him.
"He said mama earlier." Olivia told him with a huge smile.
"Suck up." Fin said and she giggled. She saw the corner of his eyes flit to the counter. "Uh Liv please tell me that this is one of the girls?" Fin asked going to the ultrasound pictures and looking at them.
"Not exactly." She said almost quietly. "Only Elliot knows right now Fin." She warned.
"Wait you're serious?" Fin asked her and she couldn't help but smile. "Holy shit."
"Pretty much what I said when I found out." She told him.
"That man is going to have a dozen kids before he's done." Fin muttered and Olivia smirked. "I'm going to assume this wasn't planned?"
"Nope. I'm waiting until after the trial to let everyone else know. I can't let Lewis's lawyer know about this."
"It won't come from me." Fin said to her.
"Or me. I'm about to become a sergeant. That's why we were waiting to disclose." Phoebe said to her.
"Congratulations." Olivia replied.
"Okay. He's bathed and ready." Elliot said coming into the kitchen holding Noah who immediately reached for Olivia.
"Come here sweet boy." Olivia said as Elliot handed him to her. "Let's go read." She said happily and he squealed. "Night uncle Fin." She said helping him wave goodnight and Fin ruffled his hair.
"I'd be happy to read to him." Phoebe offered and Olivia handed him off with a kiss. They disappeared into Noah's room and Elliot shook his head.
"Man your timing." Elliot said.
"Don't I know it." Fin muttered. "What're the kids saying?"
"We were going to tell them this weekend. Fin please don't tell anyone yet." Elliot asked.
"I won't you know that. I get wanting to wait because of the trial but let the rest of the squad know so they can cover for you. We don't know what lengths Lewis's attorney will go to."
"We will talk about it. So you and Phoebe huh?" Elliot asked.
"Sometimes I wonder what would've happened back then. But I'm glad it happened now."
"Now we just need to get Nick set up." Olivia muttered.
"Ha. I thought he and Rollins were going to hookup at first. But her and Carisi, I get it. So how do you think Noah will take it?"
"We're not sure. We had talked about surrogacy once we had a clear picture about the adoption but this changed it all." Olivia explained.
"Man you know people are still betting on you both. This is going to sweeten the pot."
"If we find out you used this knowledge to your advantage in any bets you forfeit your winnings. To us." Elliot said sternly.
"What makes you think I have any open bets?" Fin asked him.
"Oh please. You and Munch both do. We aren't that stupid." Olivia told him. "I still can't believe you both bet that I would violate the sanctity of marriage." She muttered rolling her eyes.
"In my defense I only said that after I found out about the separation. Munch was the one betting on the unsanctity of marriage." Fin pointed out. "But before I lose my job I'm gonna drop the subject." He said holding his hands up in defeat.
"Smart move." Olivia said with a smirk.
"He is out. Didn't even finish the book." Phoebe said making her way back into the kitchen.
"Thank you." Olivia said with a smile.
"Makes me miss when mine were that age." She said wistfully. "So you have other kids right?" She asked.
"I have five from my first marriage."
"I don't know how you managed."
"My ex is a saint." He explained. Elliot's phone rang and he grimaced. "Hey." He said into it before walking into the other room.
"Well now that all of our secrets are out we are going to head home. See you tomorrow Liv." Fin said before hugging her. She showed them out but before she could shut the door Eli slid his hand in.
"Sorry about the no notice." Kathy said and Olivia let them in. Eli ran directly into his room to throw off his coat and backpack.
"It's okay." Olivia said to her.
"Man your timing." Elliot said coming into the room. "So what's going on?"
"I don't know. VIP patient and they asked for me. I have my SANE certification but I haven't had it that long." Kathy said.
"I've learned that survivors remember those who treated them with dignity and not fragile. Word of mouth will get you everywhere with sexual assault victims." Olivia said. "Amanda Rollins is catching tonight. Here's her cell number." Olivia added hanging Kathy a card.
"Thanks. If Eli wants to finish the week here I'm okay with it. Just let me know." Kathy said before leaving. Olivia secured the door behind her and melted into Elliot's embrace.
"No more surprises." She said softly into Elliot's chest.
"Agreed." He said kissing her temple.
"I'll put Eli to bed." She offered. He gently kissed her lips before letting her go. He quickly changed and then went into Eli's room and watched Olivia reading him a story from the door. If this is how the rest of his life was going to turn out he was eternally thankful.