He's dead

Ocane Bch asked for a oneshot of Charming dying at the station and Emma finding him. Well chuffed with myself, managed to translate that correctly without Google :P (although I did use Google to confirm lol).

Time just went to slowly now. Nothing made me happy or filled the void left without him. It was my fault. No matter what anybody tried to tell me, it was my fault that my dad was dead. I could have saved him. Had I arrived back from the call just a few minutes earlier he wouldn't have choked to death. The doctors weren't sure exactly what caused him to choke on his lunch, but I didn't care. All I cared about was that I could have stopped it, and I failed.

Mom was trying so hard to keep it together for me, Henry and even little Neal. She was trying her best to comfort me despite grieving herself, and I felt awful for being so unresponsive and not being able to help her, but I couldn't bring myself out of this down. I didn't think I would ever be able to. No matter what anybody tried to tell me I would always blame myself that my baby brother would grow up not knowing his father. That my son had been robbed of his loving grandfather. That my mother had lost her true love. That my father had lost his life.

They didn't know I could hear them whenever people were downstairs with my mom and they asked after me. They didn't know that I could hear them when they said it was just the shock of me finding dad there, dead on the floor, that had me so removed from everyone. But I wasn't just in shock. I was guilty. No matter what anyone else said, I will forever be responsible for my father's death.