Some time later in that first night Tim stirred. He laid still for a moment, unsure what had woken him. then heard it. "No". It was a quiet plea from her side of the bed.

"Lucy"? He quietly spoke her name leaning up on his elbows so he could see her better in the dim light.

The blanket must have fallen off the bed and she was curled up in a ball on top of the sheets with her back facing him.

He watched her a few moments. He could see she appeared to be shaking then he heard her again "why are you doing this"? is what it sounded like.

This wasn't loud enough to have woken West from across their apartment. Tim has been there once when she got Kojo and he ate the whole apartment. He knew how far away their bedrooms were. He suspected she was having nightmares much more often than she realized.

Tim moved over a little closing some distance between them.
She was trembling uncontrollably. Not sure if it was the cool air or her nightmare causing it. When he placed his hand on her arm and whispered "Lucy" she didn't stir and she was still shaking. He remembered back when Isabel had a close call on the job and how he'd had to hold her every night for weeks so she could sleep. She trembled the same way.

That was different though, Isabel was his wife, he wasn't sure the right thing to do here. Actually, he knew what he wanted to do, but that damn sure wasn't the right thing. All the talking they did earlier about crossing lines, this was the kind of line he wasn't even able to talk about yet.

Tim knew for sure if he crossed it there'd be no going back for him. It wasn't the Rookie/TO line , but the line his heart won't be able to return from if he allows this kind of intimacy into their relationship. He's been trying to ignore these feelings bubbling up for months. Once this line is crossed he knows those feelings will be impossible to ignore. Lucy talked about exploring meanings here, but they'd only admitted the personal link between them, which isn't quite accurate. At least not for him.

He hadn't talked about the physical pull he felt to her, like a magnet. That he couldnt stop thinking about her, sometimes to the point of distraction. Or that he didn't want to let her go that night they'd found her. The doctors almost had to pry her out of his arms when they'd gotten her to the hospital. That he knew she has similar physical reactions to him, he'd seen her skin flush at a mere look or word from him. Seen the goosebumps and felt the heat when they'd accidentally touched.

Her shaking caused her to curl into an even tighter ball, and Tim couldnt take it anymore. It had been months since that day he'd held her so tight, her crying into his neck, tears spilling onto his shirt, as horrible as that day was, he realized how much he wanted to be this close to her all the time. He gave in.

Moving even closer, he brought his arm around her, and gently pulled her towards him. She cried out something unintelligible but didn't she wake. Her back now flush against his chest, he can feel how violently she's shaking. He leans on his other arm, his head on the pillow just above hers and whispers "You're safe boot". Just like he had that day.

Lucy uncurled the tiniest bit at the sound of his voice and moves her head closer to his. She began to slowly relax against him. She shifted slightly and his arm slides under hers, her shirt lifting just enough so his hand is now on her bare skin and he feels the tattoo. He froze but she didn't wake. With his thumb he can trace the slightly raised 'DOD' letters.

Trying not to think beyond providing comfort to her is near impossible, being this close to her, just makes him realize how much he's wanted this, and not just when he's comforting her. Tim had never had this kind of all consuming attraction to anyone before. The question was, did she feel the same, he thought maybe she did, and that created a whole other set of issues, starting with how it was totally inappropriate for him to have any sort of relationship with a subordinate. He was a rule follower... Except when some things were more important.

Her shaking had subsided quite a bit, he could hear her breathing steady. Lucy stretched her legs out a bit, and subconsciously wrapped her hand around his, then she pulled it up around herself tighter.

Even if he woke before Lucy, untangled himself from her, and she never realized they were this close...he'd have a hard time forgetting. At that moment, he made the decision to let go, just tonight, he thought. He brushed her hair back away from her face, put his arm behind his head, and lay on the pillow next to her, inhaling the smell of her and committing to memory, in case it never happened again.

He pulled his blanket over both of them, and closed his eyes. Lucy held his arm tight against her chest, and his hand intertwined in hers.