::: Chapter 1 ::: I See What's Happening Here

a/n: So right now chapters are whatever me and my stuffed squid have time to write. They may get longer, but don't hold your breath.

Now let me make this clear before we get started. I've got nothing against Transgender people, hell, one of my best friends is one. Was one. Before I came here.

"Where's here?" you might ask. Welp, here is Imladris, Rivendell of Middle Earth, in the Third Age, year 3018, 24 of December, 6 o'clock in the morning. To make that perfectly clear for you, the Council of Elrond is tomorrow, and thus begins the War of the Ring.

In case you hadn't figured it out yet, I'm a nerd and proud.

Now back to Transgender people. Why that particular topic? Well, because it's a rather bumpy ride on the struggle bus when you have never—and most likely will never,—felt like a different gender than that of your own very masculine physical form, only to wake up one day, undeniably female. In the middle of nowhere. Laying on a dirt road. With the huge horse barreling down on you about to introduce your trampled guts to the ground, in short order.

One of the many interesting things I did not anticipate when finding myself suddenly in the female form, was the mass distribution. In the event that you are a cromulently functioning human being whose consciousness has never been forcibly removed from your body and placed in one of the opposite gender, let me explain to you why this is relevant:

There isn't a huge difference in the mass distribution between a a male and a female body; we're all just squishy bags of meat in the grand scheme of things. But let me tell you, the center of gravity is most definitely different. Maybe it doesn't seem like it to you, just looking at the two, but it is. Girls and boys are not built the same.

Of course this didn't occur to me until I was frantically attempting to untangle myself from my bed sheets and get out of the way.

Understand my dilemma?

Sort of derailing the present conversation here, though I'll get back to it, notice how I said 'consciousness' earlier, not 'bodily transformed'? Yeah, that's because I'm pretty sure this is not simply a female manifestation of my body. In fact, I don't think this is me at all.

My theory, going solely off of the blonde bed-head obscuring my vision and the steadily growing pool of blood ruining my nice white sheets, is that this was just a convenient meat sack for the universe to stick me in. Because, last I checked, I wasn't blonde. Nor was I bleeding out, oddly enough.

And the reason that's pertinent, my patient friends, is because it's another tick in favor of me not getting out of the path of the aforementioned barreling horse.

For future reference, my ungainly flopping and wriggling movement from the path of imminent sticky death was most definitely caused by the unfamiliar body and the bleeding out bit. It had nothing to do with a certain lack of caffeine at this ungodly hour of the morning.

a/n: So that's that, my friendly friends. next chappie will be up Tuesday next week. (see!? I can keep a solid update schedule! I just don't do it often.)