Covet
Summary: Look only at me. Want only me. Be mine only. Otherwise, I'll break you. Dark!Kurama and Botan.
Warnings: crazy Kurama, strong sexual innuendos, profanities, drug use (no, not those things you get addicted to in real life. When I mean drug, I mean like, plant drugs... if that makes sense), explicit and mostly rough smut (sorry, I just like that kind of thing), kinks, blood and possible gore, kidnapping and entrapment. And because this is a dark romance fic, a lot of insanity and psychological trauma. Not to forget obsession, of course. There's gonna be a very good dose of that.
Due to the aforementioned warnings, the relationship between the two characters in this fanfic will most likely be toxic and abusive. Note that I don't condone this in real life, nor do I support any of the things mentioned above if it's happening in reality. This is only for the sake of the story. If you don't like this, please don't read.
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho.
Chapter 17
Hana inspected Botan's feminine, prepossessing features as the ferry girl continued to be immersed in her deep slumber. Her eyelashes were pretty long and thick, though Hana discerned that a long time ago as they were quite noticeable even from a great distance away. Her face was a porcelain white hue, but the ivory color of her skin was accentuated even further due to the few petechiae of salmon pink apparent at the tip of her nose and her cheeks, where the rosy tincture gave off the impression of a beautiful glow. The grim reaper's lips appeared to have a glossy but soft texture when Hana leaned in only slightly to scrutinize them better, the gentle gleam underlined to a greater extent by the cute pink tinging her mouth. The cerulean tendrils of her forelocks and fringe demurely fell over her sleeping face like a curtain, seemingly lustrous and silky to the touch as Hana reached forward to brush her bangs away from her shut eyelids and tucked her ringlets behind her ears, which she realized were curled into a small spiral shape at the end of her strands.
She wasn't sure of the reason behind her steadfast survey on the ferry girl. After all, she had been impersonating her for the past three days - remembering her looks to a tee was only part of her job. But Hana couldn't help herself but be drawn to the alluring innocence that Botan's countenance appeared to effuse. It was a look that a plant created simply to live a life full of deceit like her would forever be unable to endorse no matter how hard she would try. There was a certain childlike ambience radiating off of the grim reaper, though this held in contradiction with the fact that she also came across as harboring a wise maturity that Hana felt like she wouldn't be able to understand. It was no doubt a byproduct of years of ferrying dead souls to their rightful place and being a spectator of a plethora of gruesome scenes.
It was an oddity, but Hana was able to grasp the grounds in which Botan could have attracted Kurama, even if the infatuation was, in all honesty, unhealthy love to the point of obsession. Looking back, there were probably plenty of men who were enthralled by the ferry girl's charm, though Hana hoped none of them would ever attempt to make advances on her anymore now that the entirety of Reikai was aware of Botan's supposed relationship with Kurama. She truthfully didn't wish for more blood to be shed due to the fox's destructive possessive streak, if only for the sake of aspiring to keep Botan's sanity intact.
She hadn't realized that her hand was still lingering on the right side of Botan's head until the grim reaper began to give a little stir in her sleep. Panic brewing within her insides, Hana instantly pulled her hand away in an almost frantic manner, her eyes widening an inch in slight alarm as Botan's eyelids trembled before they motioned to flutter open. Hana was fairly certain that she didn't necessarily have a heart - what she owned under her chest, instead, was a core that could as well be considered as one but also not at the same time, serving to be her lifeline and the source of her powers. But she could have sworn her core kicked off to a wild, high-pitched beat as soon as she saw that Botan was blinking her eyes open.
All at once, a surplus of disquieted thoughts began to surface in the back of her head, all ranging from how Botan would react and what answers were acceptable enough to offer if the ferry girl would decide to ask her questions. Be that as it may, Hana willed her core to calm down and schooled her features as Botan slid her eyes open and closed for a couple more times as if to adjust her vision to a clearer state. A pair scintillated amethysts steadily focused and Hana swallowed a lump in her throat.
There was a moment of silence as Botan finally registered that she failed to recognize the newfound face in front of her. Fortunately, Hana's original physique took the shape similar to that of Hinageshi's small posture, apparently resembling that of a girl in her early teenage years, and thus didn't elicit a rush of alarm and doubt from Botan. There was, however, a speck of sprouting confusion, mingled with a stronger iota of curiosity as Botan levelled her with a long, hard stare and slowly propped herself up on her elbows.
An abrupt spasm of ache travelled through her belly as the energy wave of the twins inside her continued to build up to greater heights, causing the ferry girl to involuntarily sound out a soft hiss of pain as she struggled to get herself into a sitting position. Hana noticed the telltale signs of her discomfort and quickly stood up from the chair she was perched on to place her hand on the middle of Botan's back and the other on her right shoulder as she cautiously and tenderly assisted Botan to lie her back against the wooden headboard of the bed.
"Thank you," Botan murmured with an appreciative touch in her moderately hoarse voice.
Hana took the croaking drum of her timbre as a token of parched throat and immediately went to outstretch her hand for the mug of warm chocolate situated on the nightstand which Kurama had prepared for her. A good amount of warmth had dissipated as the beverage had been reduced to a colder temperature due the extended duration of time, but Hana prudently but generously handed it to the ferry girl.
"Ah, thank you again," Botan expressed her gratitude once more in spite of Hana's generally unresponsive demeanor as she curled her fingers around the curvy handle of the mug and accepted the plant's altruistic gesture.
A small smile of indebtedness spread at the corners of Botan's lips, the warmth perceptible in the slant prompting an inadvertent surge of profuse elation to puddle in the pits of Hana's stomach despite the stall of baffled interest prominent in the ferry girl's lavenders.
It was so different from the icy aloofness of Kurama's dimmed greens, a direct contrast to the fox's occasionally infinitesimal looks of disdain - and Hana wasn't confident about how she should take it, or whether she deserved it in the first place.
"Who are you, if you don't mind me asking?" came Botan's attentive inquiry, her voice friendly but with a trace of building trepidation.
Taking into account that she was in Kurama's bedroom as well, Hana couldn't blame her for being afraid of her. If anything, she had expected to be greeted with fright as soon as Botan had awakened from her sleep, though the grim reaper articulated a slight distinction to Hana's predictions from the way she considered her with mild kindness all the same. Truth be told, Hana was rendered speechless from blended surprise and terror that Botan wasn't manifesting a stronger bout of hostility at her presence. After all, considering that she was permitted entrance into Kurama's chamber, it would be exceedingly effortless for Botan to put two and two together and deduce that she was, in all likelihood, remarkably incorporated in Kurama's schemes.
A vague flow of reticence flitted between the two women for what was outwardly a few dragged out seconds before Hana eventually summoned her voice to crawl up her throat. Her hands gripped on the fabric of her dress, fingers clenching into fists on the hem of her miniature gown as she readied herself for the impact she anticipated to receive once her response bubbled out of her throat.
Her timbre was barely above the octave of a mumble as she hesitantly articulated her name, "Hana. I'm Hana."
She expected Botan to flung a harsh smack on her cheek, or even shower her with a downpour of verbal assault or uncurbed animosity as a result of her suppressed mental strain. After the huge role she played in ensuring that Kurama's plans would go off without a hitch, Hana was reasonably assertive in her suppositions that she wouldn't secure an amicable reaction no matter what form Botan's resentment would opt to adopt.
Even so, what she evoked in return held in dispute Hana's calculations as Botan's orbs merely broadened into saucers in scant astonishment before they slowly but surely reinstated their previous size as the shock died down from her system all too quickly for Hana's taste. A small pause loitered in the strange ambience around them as Botan allowed herself a brief moment to take a sip of her chocolate-flavored drink before she finally rippled out a response.
"Oh." A morsel of understanding flitted over her features before another sweet-tempered smile angled upwards at the edges of her lips. "I expected as much. Last time I checked, you're ultimately the only one who Kurama lets be aware of the current situation. It wouldn't be strange if it were you." There was not even a minor of antagonism in Botan's voice, her timbre unusually barred from any emotions other than a modicum of sympathy as she verbalized the letters. The peculiar riposte brought forth Hana's own stewing bewilderment as she regarded the ferry girl with a deep frown.
"You're not lashing out," she illuminated the words in a voice that was too low for her own comfort before it rose up a notch to indicate her budding perplexity as she briskly voiced out, "Why aren't you lashing out?"
Botan's smile never wavered from her physiognomy, though it divulged another approach of bitter dejection as she muttered a rhetorical question under her breath, "Do you want me to?"
The dubious smidgen in her relatively placid timbre, coupled with the swirl of repressed mixture of sorrow and remorse visible in the incline of the ferry girl's lips tugged at the strings of her core.
Hana averted her gaze to the left in order to elude Botan's inquisitive gape as she vocalled her reply with her own portion of inquiry, "Do you always do what people want you to do? And no, you don't need to lash out if you don't want to. I just… I sort of thought you would." Though hers chimed in a subtle compassion as the syllables bubbled out her throat in the midst of a demeaning scoff before the final sentence left her in a rather uncertain tone.
An empty giggle rumbled through Botan's chest, the smile not reaching her eyes as a jovial grin latched on to the corners of her mouth. "I reckon I lost some of my senses after this entire ordeal. I don't even have the energy to be angry or fight back anymore." She halted mid-sentence to blink away the tears pooling in her eyes as she felt them water before she cleared them away. "I can't run away anymore, you know. Although, I suppose with Kurama, he might have already disclosed the news to you." A scruple of quelled outrage was latent beneath the composure in her tonality as Botan uttered the last sentence. "The pregnancy is one thing, but even if I wasn't expecting, the mating marks would never go away unless one of us dies. In the slim chance that I would be able to escape, he would always be able to pinpoint my location anywho due to one of the effects of mating that gives you the ability of knowing your mate's whereabouts no matter where you go."
Hana spared herself a short-lived fraction of a second of silence as considered the piece of information as the ferry girl divulged in the details. "I've read about that before. Kurama doesn't tell me much as he foresees that I would figure it out myself. Neither does he make an effort to confirm it as he deems it unnecessary to fill in about personal matters to someone he considers… a slave or something of the sort." She paused for a moment to recoup her presence of mind as her tranquility was briefly ruptured thanks to the few aftermost words that echoed from her throat. "He doesn't give much of a damn about me."
Being a Kuronishi, she had the vast capability to educate herself at an abnormal rate, therefore the instant she learned about affection and compassion from Botan's peers at Reikai in those short-lived three days prior, she grew to detest being treated as nothing more than pawn when the need to be seemed as more than an object puddled even further in her core.
Botan appeared to perceive the negligible melancholy in her timbre despite her effortless attempts at retrieving her apathetic guise. A consoling smile crooked at the contours of her lips as an equally sympathetic imbue danced in her pools of pretty lilacs. "In a way, I kind of anticipated hearing that. I doubt that he ever cares about anyone else anymore. If I hadn't come to awareness about who he really is, I probably would have reassured you that you might be jumping into conclusions."
She took another sip of the beverage in her hands as she brought the mug to her mouth, tilting it back as the sweet, slightly chilled flavor of chocolate melted on her tongue. "To be honest with you, that assumption is also what made me more accepting of you acting as an impostor in my place. Granted, I was rather vengeful at first, but after some thought, I realized that it wasn't as if you knew what you were doing. You're like me, in a way. The sole reason you were made to exist is to imitate and deceive others, just like how I was reincarnated to be a messenger of death. It's our duty, to put it simply. I did what I was ordered to the first few times without any feelings at all until it slowly dawned on me that humans were more than interesting subjects I could study. I didn't apprehend the horrors of my line of work until I began fostering my own humanity and emotions."
She positioned the mug back to its original place on the nightstand before outreaching her right hand to cup over the back of Hana's left, perceptive of the tiny twitch of the plant's fingers as their digits came in contact but sensitive enough not to point it out. "So don't worry about it. I stopped being resentful at you a couple of days ago. I understand that you weren't given much of a choice. You can't go against the person who gave you life after all."
Is that it? Came Hana's line of thought as she swallowed a thick trail of saliva down her throat. The ferry girl's understanding encapsulated another tug at her corestrings, the feeling poignant and warmth at the same time. After everything Botan was put through, Hana didn't think she would be bestowed forgiveness for her actions so easily and in such a hotfoot manner. Even if she harbored a thorough grasp of how Hana's circumstances were, Hana gauged Botan's overly forbearing demeanor to be good-natured to a dangerous extent. No wonder it's so easy for you to take advantage of her, Kurama. The musing rose along with her revelation in only a nanosecond spared, a modest frisson of mild spleen multiplying at the middle of her chest.
Upon finer contemplation, Hana couldn't help but mull over the chances of Botan somehow developing a serious case of Stockholm Syndrome. But the longer she dwelled on the probability, the stronger the wave of cognition that washed over Hana enjoining her that Botan's feelings for the redhead lied even deeper than that. If anything, Botan's romantic affections for Kurama had kindled from way before her captivity, elapsing as far back from even the Dark Tournament where her sexual attraction towards him had developed into childish infatuation before eventually blossoming into unfathomable love. In devouring a lock of the ferry girl's hair, Hana had succeeded to seize in her possession Botan's memories after all. Therefore, it wasn't considerably peculiar of her to be aware of this. However, the emotions Botan nurtured in her memory bank remained a distinct element in her replicating skills. This was in order to prevent her from becoming too engrossed in the act - thankfully, because Hana wasn't exactly in joy over the prospect of falling in love with a pompous and possessive psycho like Kurama.
Regardless of that, however, her amorous sentiment for Kurama was beyond question what led Botan to her downfall in the first place. Too trusting for her own good, Botan was nevertheless in denial that there was no shred of morality underneath the monster that Kurama exhibited - this much Hana could ascertain from the contradicting fusion of emotions of love and hatred she could see perturbing the phlegm of Botan's lavenders. On one hand, her refusal to face the reality of Kurama's true identity was a lucid coping mechanism from Hana's standpoint. On the other, still, the plant found the whole thing to be foolish.
Granted, even if Botan's intimate fondness for the fox were to be completely stripped off of her, the idea of her escape would still be a practically fragile opportunity and a rather nonsensical possibility to entertain as there was the hindrance of the effects of the mating marks that contributed to tying them together. Add the presence of their twins, then Botan's bleak future only seemed to propel herself further down the dark tunnel she found herself in. And yet, Hana had nevertheless expected for every last remnant of the ferry girl's love for Kurama to downright disperse into nothing but contempt. Of course, the scintillia of loathing was transparent in Botan's orbs - but there was also a good amount of lingering devotion Hana could detect merging together with it.
After all this, you still want him? Hana wasn't certain of the whirlwind of feelings accumulating in the depths of her abdomen. Flouring frustration compounded with a torrent of pity and striked at the middle of her core.
She wanted to tell Botan that she should drop her savior complex. That Kurama couldn't be saved. That she was deluding herself into thinking that Kurama was anything more than insanity incarnate. That her adoration for him would only wind up tangling herself even more in the web of endless agony and manipulation. But the words failed to roll off her tongue, the syllables apparently lodged somewhere in her throat instead.
Alas, she couldn't voice her perceptions aloud. Despite her insides wanting the ferry girl to realize the truth of the current situation, Hana couldn't bring herself to force her opinions on her as she was more afraid of the possible risk of them having an adverse repercussion on Botan. She was still carrying the twins, after all, and Hana couldn't afford to bring forth more stress to the already mounting strain on Botan's mental stability.
"There are a number of rules that coincides with my existence, you see," Hana opted to elucidate about herself instead, stifling the discontent pooling inside her down to the deepest pits of her gut as she recaptured her equilibrium.
When Botan swivelled her purple irises at her in piqued interest, Hana went on, "I guess you could consider it as a contract. The moment Kurama sprung me to life, he forced a set of regulations that, if I were to violate, it would end with my demise. One of them being that I'm not to use my powers against him and that I'm to follow each of his commands. There's also a part of the contract which proclaims that I'm not permitted to disclose any detail of his plans to anyone unless he says otherwise. But most importantly, I'm governed by the rules of the contract and I can't betray his trust."
She paused as she took a moment to speculate over the reason why she was unveiling such sensitive information. In all honesty, she wasn't infringing on any of the prohibitions in the contract, but it wasn't as if she was obligated to apprise Botan of the covenant Kurama had imposed on her. Nonetheless, seeing the ferry girl being so open with her postulations and being so understanding to her background compelled her to at least proffer Botan more insight to how Kurama's powers with the Kuronishi functioned. Of course, what she truly intended to do was to confer Botan at least a tad bit of in-depth comprehension to herself, even though the agreement with her and Kurama was honestly the only thing she could think of.
"Sorry," Hana mumbled under her breath, irresolute in her rationale for uttering the apology but letting it out in the open anyway, "You probably didn't want to hear how fucked up he is. I wasn't thinking."
Botan shook her head, her eyes wide for long-lasting moments as she allowed the bits of data to sink in her brain before she noted the whit of remorse dormant underneath Hana's blank pair of verdants. "That's not it at all, I just…" she trailed off when the sliding door to the bathroom slithered open, and out came Kurama with a towel wrapped around his waist and a smaller one draped over his moisture-ladened mane.
Droplets of water dribbled from the tips of his flattened scarlet hair, tendrils of ruby forelocks sticking to his face as liquid matted his strands to various areas of his visage. He was wearing an unreadable expression on his delicate features, though the single thin line of muted displeasure conspicuous on his lips stipulated an inkling of his fermenting malice. Neither of the two women had caught the sounds of the shower flicking off due to submerging themselves in the conversation, thus hadn't been expecting him to step out. Kurama whirled his dimmed emeralds at Hana's direction, a particle of a subtle threat flashing dangerously in his menacing peridots before he squinted his lips upwards into a chilling smile.
"Hana." His voice drummed out in a booming echo in the suddenly tense air, tight and controlled and her name left his lips. "Can I have a little chat with you outside? Just the both of us."
Hana felt an upsurge of dread bubbling in her chest, a stronger stream of anxiety gripping her at her sides as she complied, pushing herself off of the chair and making to amble out the room. She reached an arm to curl her fist around the doorknob and was halfway through pushing the door open when Botan's voice reverberated through the walls.
"Wait," the ferry girl implored her to stay before twirling her gape at her mate. Her delicate eyebrows creased into a deep, concern-congested frown as her timbre was heavily laced in stern beseech. "If you have something to say to her, say it in front of me, Kurama. The least you could do is stop keeping things hidden from me."
"Frankly, it's not of importance to our relationship. Hana is nothing but a subordinate, you shouldn't concern yourself with her too much." Kurama's reply was brisk, harboring a subdued edge of exasperation undertones underneath his composed baritone.
A pang of hurt striked at the middle of the grim reaper's chest, the ache further augmented to an uplifted intensity of pain as a snake coiled around her heart in thriving bouts of chagrin. "You chose to involve her in this the instant you made the decision to force her into impersonating me," her anger-tinted response rippled out her throat in a belligerent growl. "Stop trying to keep me in the dark about everything."
"You don't have to know," he swiftly argued, the suppressed annoyance in his tonality more perceptible now before he speedily collected himself. You don't have to know more about the subtle threats I give her. You don't need to know anything about her. Despite the monstrous extremes he was willing to go to that he had displayed before his beloved, a part of him that was still very much head over heels for the ferry girl impelled him to at least savor a little bit of his image in her perspective.
That, and it also brought upon a profuse spate of spite to spark through every nerve of his being that Hana had succeeded to slightly worm her way through Botan's defenses in the brief duration of time that he had left the ferry girl only for a short while to sanction himself a hot shower. A moderate tincture of green envy intermingled with the bitter resentment, but the fox sought to push it away.
It was such a foolish sentiment, especially after taking into account the fact that he was the one who issued the order for Hana to befriend her in the first place. Although, he had sensed a feeling he hoped Hana didn't discern in the flows of her energy even from inside the shower room. What am I doing? Being jealous of Youko and her? Youko was one thing, but Hana was another.
She was nothing but a mere plant, a vegetation he conjured up to be his faithful pawn in putting his devious plan into action. Yet the simple probability of Hana getting too close to his mate made his blood boil. You're being ridiculous, Kurama. He attempted to convince himself that it was indeed only a misconception on his part. But he could recognize the stir of interest even if he hadn't feasted his eyes on it. The mere sporadic spike of Hana's aura as it emitted off of her and prickled into his skin from even inside the bathroom was enough to induce a nauseating sensation to pool in his stomach. The mere thumping of her core he could detect was adequate to evoke his puddle of wrath to convolute around the middle of his chest.
...But it wasn't relevant. Part of her contract entailed that she was prohibited from double-crossing his trust and breaching his orders after all, no matter the nature of his commands. Even if Hana's interest in his ferry girl would eventually instigate into something more, she would perish and wither before she could even stand a chance.
As it stood, developing feelings for Botan would come across as a betrayal to him regardless. If Hana retained the slightest bit of keen intellect he had granted her and taught her, she would ensure that she wouldn't go past beyond the boundaries of friendship.
The revelation hit him like a ton of bricks and all of a sudden, he felt like a half-wit for humoring the notion of Hana stealing Botan's affections from him to begin with. It would have been a union that would have never transpired at all in the first place. His fiery angry cooled down to a flicker as he recouped his composure, another smile slanted at the corners of his lips, and this time it harbored an apologetic touch as he trudged over to the bed, his footsteps a soft thudding noise as his feet strided against the floor. He took a seat on an unoccupied space of the bed near Botan before outstretching a hand to seize a gentle and doting hold around her wrist.
"Alright then," he echoed against her skin as he brought her fingers to his lips, placing soft, affectionate kisses on the pads of her digits before trailing his mouth lower still to her wrist. "I suppose it's not an important discussion. I was quite offended that Hana was disclosing the details of the covenant, you see. But after some mulling over it, I've realized that with you being my mate and all, I wouldn't have to keep the contract a secret from you."
That was half-true. In actuality, he was actually quite provoked that Hana had filled in the regulations of the covenant. Despite not being a direct opposition to the moratorium in the pledge, he didn't deem it necessary for Botan to find out. Nevertheless, the agreement between him and Hana would not, in all likelihood, resort to becoming a liability in his relationship with Botan. And even if it did, her core would self-destruct on its own.
Hana wasn't a threat.
"Well, at least you realize this," Botan rumbled with a certain tenderness in her voice, a hint of shame quiescent beneath as Kurama darted his tongue out to dawdle along the rosy tips of her fingers, swirling around her digits before he wrapped his mouth around them and proffered her a short but vigorous suck. A shiver of delight racked down her spine, but Botan swiftly quelled the arousal building in the centre between her legs as she discerned that Hana's presence was still in the room.
"Hana," Kurama spoke once he popped Botan's fingers out of his mouth, leaving a thin string of saliva connecting the tip of his tongue and her red-painted nails as he conferred each finger a final, featherlight kiss before aiming his jaded orbs at Hana's direction without turning his head. There was an asserted authority in his voice, an ominous scintillia lurking underneath his serene pools of greens. There was a short-lived pause as he let his lips linger on Botan's ring finger before he finally articulated his forceful command, "Go cook some food for us. Botan would need some nutrients for herself and the babies."
Hana perceived the ultimatum in his rich, smooth baritone, and sparing only a fleeting glance at Kurama's and Botan's joined hands, she pottered out the room with barely audible steps and shut the door close behind her.
The fox waited for the sounds of Hana's thudding footsteps to thoroughly diminish into thin air before voicing out his neutrally-enunciated question, "Do you like her?"
The ferry girl fluttered her eyelashes at him in a mystified blink, curious bewilderment eliciting off her radiant, baffled lilac-tinted irises as she levelled a steadfast, scrutinizing stare on her mate. "Who, Hana? I mean, I think we can be friends. She looks like a nice girl," the answer rippled out her throat in a leisure drone.
"Hm," he echoed in a thoughtful hum as he ruminated the chances of the grim reaper obscuring some important details from him. Notwithstanding the fact he could sense that she had more perceptions she apparently seemed to want to verbalize but probably not at the moment, Kurama decided against probing further into her conceptions. Hana was a topic for a later date, he determined, as there were more pressing issues for them to chew over. "We're going to see Koenma tomorrow. Your return to Reikai aside, we still have to inform him of the twins."
Botan visibly blanched at that, her face draining of color and turning pale white from the mention of divulging the news to Reikai, of all things. Although her faith in Koenma was impeccable and rather obtuse, her torrent of consternation stemmed from the probability of Enma's cruel reactions and possible ruthless instructions that could be warranted from her odd pregnancy. Reikai was a place filled with spirits who were fearful of things that were unknown - similar to that of humans, they tended to be more condescending and merciless to concepts that they couldn't fully grasp. Her being a ferry girl and pregnant at the same time was one thing - after all grim reapers carrying children were unheard of, but the twins being a byproduct of a demon and ferry girl union was another. One of the rules the Reikai higher ups greatly considered to be of significant value in what she could only assume was blind belief that it would be able to keep the balance between the three worlds unperturbed, the few most relevant regulations barred a relationship of people outside of their origins.
Humans weren't allowed to be with demons, and demons weren't allowed to be with ferry girls or reigens at all for that matter. Anything outside their kin was judged as immoral conduct and a great sin. Keiko's and Yusuke's case was a different issue altogether, considering that they only figured out until later that Yusuke possessed the Mazoku bloodline. And even then, an order for Yusuke's assassination had been conferred to the SDF members in order to "keep the balance of the three realms protected". Even Keiko's and Yusuke's marriage had garnered a lot of unwanted disputes all over Reikai and it was only with Koenma's intervention that the two were allowed to be wedded.
But this was unlike Yusuke and Keiko. Reikai was her home. She was a grim reaper, a direct messenger of Death in Reikai's system. She didn't own a safe haven like Keiko did, and the odds of her punishment being more severe was at an all time high. Dissecting was among one of the things she could conjure up in her head. In spite of turning a blind eye to her supposed relationship with Kurama, the inkling of her pregnancy could as well ignite unfair treatment against her unborn children.
She had been hopeful when Kurama first notified her that she was freed from the shackles of his home and the chains of captivity. Had even been more than gleeful that she was given the permission to return to Reikai. But the content jocular daydream had been relatively short-lived, crushed under the overwhelming despair induced by both the realization that she had nowhere else to go but to turn to Kurama and by the revelation that Reikai might dispose of her.
"We'll think about it later," Kurama's voice reached her ears, the sudden verbalized syllables bringing her out of reverie as she hoisted her head upwards to focus on him once more. Although, his baritone sounded far from sincerely reassuring as it reverberated in the ambience in infinitesimal self-satisfaction. And the smile on his lips was nothing short of sinister, the undertones of sadistic gratification perceptible as freckles of strong gold interflowed with the captivating of his peridots under his long and thick eyelashes.
"I can assure you that even if Reikai were to abandon you, I would still be here, Botan." His voice sounded like leather, like honey, like poison and like needles at the same time as the hushed whisper resounded from the back of his throat. He leaned in to kiss away the warm tears peeking at the corners of his eyelids. "Whatever happens, I would always be here. I'll be your support, your aid and everything more, sweetheart. So long as you remain by my side, I can be whatever you want. I'll stay with you, forever." His lips descended lower to the pointed tip of her nose before trudging further downwards to steal hers in a brief but bruising kiss. "Just like you are mine forever."
A/N: I don't know why, but I feel like my writing style has regressed in a way lmao. And I'm actually getting a little busy these days. Come March I might have to work as an intern in an architecture firm so I've been quite preoccupied as of late. Though I will try to update everyday like I usually do. When March arrives, I'm not sure if I can have enough time to update so I'm trying to give you guys as much as I can while I can lol. Of course, being an intern doesn't mean that I'll abandon any of my stories. Just that my schedule would most likely be very packed, and I'm worried of the probability of being busy for a long time. My updates would be irregular by the time March comes around, that I can assure you at least.
kyoandyuya- I thought of it being a triangle at first, but after a while, I preferred it to be a polygamorous relationship instead. There's gonna be moments of rivalry here and there of course, but it's probably more of forced sharing than anything else - considering the plot that I'm coming up in my head lololol. And yes, Youko keeps stealing Kurama's spot in my eyes as a fan lmao. He just has more appeal in my opinion. Which is why I tend to incline going for Kurama/Botan/Youko instead of either Youko/Botan and Kurama/Botan. Might write an actual love triangle AU sometime though.
Howdy Aamy- I actually thought of killing her off, but I was more attracted to the idea of her serving as a pillar of sanity or something of the sort for Botan aside from her kids. Consider her the only friend who's actually trying to help Botan along with Kurama's crazy tendencies in later updates lmao. I think the fact that I made her rather compassionate, a direct contradiction to her being created by the literal spawn of the devil, is actually ironic. I see her as this emotionless doll until she learns friendship and such and realizes that she's more humane than Kurama himself. To be honest though, I think the thing about Kurama is that his ruthlessness lies in the fact that he's calm, calculating and cold at the same time. He's scary in general lol.
And yes, I realize that the idea of a split is rather too much, but hey, I actually like a challenge lol. And can't lie, the idea of threesomes and polygamorous relationships have been bugging me since the idea of breaking them apart came to mind. And don't worry, Botan can handle it XD. I'm not entirely confident that I can pull it off, but even before writing a darkfic, I wasn't entirely positive I was capable until I actually did and people liked it lmao. Besides, it felt like it would be unfair to entertain the idea of Youko/Kurama rivalry over Botan in the previous chapters but never exploring more of the concept. Youko needs more love too XD.
As usual, sorry for not giving you a full response! :( I always feel bad about it.
Tashio- You know, your review, and the plot that I'm coming up with correlates really. I thought it would be impossible to just have them tugging Botan around and indulging in bloody battles to stake their claim on her. One, it would have been unfair for Shuichi, as you've mentioned before that he has lesser demon energy than Youko. And Youko would have been the victor. I'd like to drag this story a lot more, so I was considering a way to make them split but actually make them unable to hurt each other, because really, they're really just two sides of the same coin. I see them at two different alter egos really. And Kurama would have to rely on Youko's strength from time to time. Instead of fighting over her, I feel like they would resort to a civil polygamarous relationship - though it'd probably be forced sharing because I'm not really planning on making them fight each other, but still. Two intellectual minds combined is better than fighting and causing more damage (even though Shuichi already did a lot of damage lol). I think they would utilize each other to their advantage instead of bitterly clawing each other's throats.
I was actually thinking up a plot while I was typing along the previous chapter. And I came up with the idea of making them being forced into sharing after posting the previous update because I felt like it would be nonsensical in a way not to make their nerves still connected to each other. Regardless, there are going to be plenty of moments where they would be very competitive over who's better, but not to the point of actually severing the polygamarous relationship lol. And reading your review makes me more assured to pull the notion of sharing Botan a lot more than a love triangle.
I'm really not good at explaining things I have in my brain so I apologize if some parts are confusing. My head is really just a jumbled mess of other stories, this fic and life at this point lololol.
