Hello once again! Sorry this is slightly late; I've had the worst cold/flu the last couple of days, as a result of staying up too late and waking up too early during my school's performance of The Sound of Music. :P
This weeks shout-outs go to: someone, ThatGirlWhoLovesELO (great name, and happy belated birthday!) and Taboo22. Thank you, as always, for reviewing. :)
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or any of its characters. Only Alice is mine.
Han and Alice walked out of the medical centre in silence, with Chewie and the droids a couple of steps behind. They made it most of the way down the corridor before Alice couldn't hold it in anymore, "Sorry, can we talk about the fact that Leia kissed Luke? I am not okay with this. Are you okay with it? Because I'm really not."
"What's there to say?" Han asked gruffly.
How about: "incest is wrong and very, very culturally frowned upon".
"It just didn't seem like her, that's all," Alice muttered.
It wasn't till they reached the control room that she realised it was actually their destination. "So what did that announcement thing say?"
"They were telling me to come to the control room."
"So why did you want me to come?" Alice made a face.
"Did you really want to stay with Luke?"
"…Fair point."
"Captain Solo." An orderly hailed them from nearby, and the two of them paused to listen to her, "Princess Leia and General Rieekan are waiting for you." She pointed them across the room and went back to her work.
Obediently, they squeezed through the maze of screens, and reached Leia and General Rieekan, who were studying one of the holographic screens intently.
"Captain Solo, Private Miller. We've picked up something outside the base. Zone Twelve and moving east."
"It's metal," the operator said, tapping furiously at his little keyboard.
"Then it couldn't be one of those creatures," Leia said, in a tone that made it more of a statement than a question.
"Could be a speeder," suggested Han, "one of ours?"
The operator pressed a hand to the headset he wore, and shook his head, "No. Wait." He paused, listening, and they all leaned in, waiting. "There's something very weak coming through."
A stream of meaningless babble played briefly over the speakers, and Alice huffed, "Come on, that's ridiculous. Who could possibly understand that-"
"Sir, I am fluent in over six million forms of communication and this signal is not used by the Alliance." Everyone turned to stare at Threepio, standing unobtrusively at one of the other screens. "It could be an Imperial code."
They all turned back to face each other. "I retract my earlier statement," Alice said.
Han twitched, then said, "It isn't friendly, whatever it is. Come on Chewie, let's check it out."
"You're joking, right?" Alice said, planting herself in his path before he could leave, "You only just survived your last little expedition. What makes you think I'm going to let you go out again?"
"It's not up to you, kid," he said, dismissively, "you're only a private. I'm the captain."
"Ha! Like that means anything."
"Alice, could you-" Suddenly, his eyes lit up with what was unmistakeably an Idea. And in Alice's experience, all of Han's ideas so far had been bad. (Han's ideas thus-far: chasing down that stray Imperial fighter, dressing up as a storm trooper, and following Luke into a snow-storm on an ice planet, which though heroic, was still very stupid.) In light of these incidents, seeing that familiar crafty look on his face wasn't particularly encouraging.
"Han," she said slowly, "What are you-"
Before she could finish speaking, in full view of General Rieekan, Chewie, and most importantly, Leia, Han kissed Alice.
OH. MY. GOD.
Her brain seemed to freeze for about three seconds, then suddenly kicked into overdrive, babbling at breakneck speed just to fill the awkward silence. Well, this is all very sudden – what in the name of hell is he doing? I don't understand, I thought that he…I mean…Luke…gosh, it really is very quiet, isn't it, what's happened to all the noise-?
Right on cue, a vague choking sound broke into the mess of Alice's thoughts, and she realised very suddenly it had been about twenty seconds and Han was still kissing her and- oh my god, he's kissing me and Leia is right there.
Grabbing her brain with both hands (metaphorically, obviously – her real hands were, for some unfathomable reason, clutching the lapels of Han's jacket in a death grip), Alice somehow managed to regain her senses and break the kiss. She shoved Han away from her, guiltily taking in the shocked faces of their audience.
"Are you crazy?" Alice hissed at Han as she stared at Leia's blank, unreadable expression over his shoulder, "Leia's going to kill me!"
"A kiss for a kiss, sweetheart," he whispered back, clearly delighted with himself, "let's see how she likes it." He surveyed her inevitably flushed cheeks, and said, cockily, "Besides, you seemed to be enjoying yourself."
She could only stare at him, caught between fury and amazement. Taking advantage of her silence, he chucked her under the chin and stole another quick kiss, before saying, "Don't worry, kid. I'll be back before you know it."
Then he just strode away, leaving Alice standing lamely where she was, her lips tingling slightly and her face hotter than the hottest chili pepper ever grown.
Dear god. I have never been so mortified in my entire life. Not even that time when I had to play the angel Gabriel in the school nativity and my halo got set on fire by my candle and then I had to jump in the donkey's trough of water to put myself out. And then I accidentally pulled the shepherds in too. Actually…that was pretty damn embarrassing. Make this my second most embarrassing moment ever.
"Uhhh…so, ah…" Alice searched desperately for something to do, anything other than just standing there like a lemon… "General." She snapped to attention and stared madly at General Rieekan, hoping he would get the hint. "Orders?"
"Ah…" He glanced apprehensively at Leia, who was still standing absolutely frozen on the other side of the screen, "yes. Private Miller, please escort the princess…" Alice shook her head frantically, and he backtracked at once, "I mean, please alert the speeder pilots that they may need to have their craft ready for an assault. Dismissed."
"Yes, sir." And then, because she didn't really know how to march, she wheeled around and to her eternal shame, ran out of the room.
When Alice had completed her mission, so to speak, she simply hung around the main hangar, waiting for Han to come back, and dwelling obsessively on her own guilty conscience. Han kissed me! In front of Leia! How did this happen? And by the way, how is it fair that the first time someone kisses me first it's to make someone else jealous? She started to pace, grumbling irritably under her breath as she went.
"Mistress Alice?"
"Not now, Threepio," Alice gritted through her teeth.
"But this really is rather-"
"Dude!" She spun to face the droid, flinging her arms up in the air, "Can't you see I'm indulging in angst!"
"Hey, kid!"
"Han!"
He and Chewie were crossing the hangar to get to her, Han pulling off his outdoor gear and flinging it grimly aside as he went. For a moment, Alice struggled with the need to demand, in fuller detail what he'd been playing at just now, against the desire to know what he'd found in the snow.
It would appear that indignation and guilt were the stronger emotions. As Han reached her, Alice moved deliberately to block his path, her arms folded, "Hey."
"What?" He said, looking confrontational – evidently whatever he'd found had put him in a bad mood. That couldn't be good news.
"Why on earth would you ever kiss me, let alone in front of Leia?" Alice accused him, surprised to find just how angry she really was, almost more on Leia's behalf than hers – almost. "It's just gonna mess everything up."
"I don't know," Han said, pushing past her and ducking under the wing of the Falcon, "it seemed like a good idea at the time. But I'll tell you, if this is how you react to one little kiss, you can be damn sure I won't be doing it again."
"Good," she said, loudly. Under her breath, she muttered, "That was not a 'little kiss'."
"Anyway, kid, I'll think you find we have bigger problems," he said, turning away from her and ducking under the Falcon to inspect it.
"Why?" She said, moodily.
"That unidentifiable metal object?" He said, his voice echoing slightly and conveying perfectly his sarcastic tone, "Imperial probe droid. It was spying on us. They know we're here."
Alice huffed, "So what now?"
"General Rieekan has already ordered an evacuation. The quicker we can get everyone out, the better."
"Right. What should I do?"
There was a pause, then he reappeared from under the Falcon, a smudge of oil on his cheek. "Do?"
"Yeah," she said, in a 'duh' tone, "Private Miller, reporting for duty."
"What you do, kid, is you get on the first transport to go and you stay on it."
"What? No!" She bristled, "I'm not doing the waiting thing again. I hate it."
"I ain't asking, kid, I'm telling you. Captain Solo, remember? Besides, there's nothing you can do, and you know it."
"Hang on…" she said, as he moved over to the Millennium Falcon and hoisted himself up on to its wing, "Why would I take a transport? You…you are coming with us, aren't you?"
"'Fraid not, kid," he called, "it's time I got out of here. Now seems as good a time as any, and the sooner I pay off Jabba the Hutt the better."
"So will you come back, once you've paid?" She got nothing but silence in response, "Somehow I knew you were going to say that." Still more silence. Alice folded her arms, "You know, you can't just go around kissing people and then abandon them to their fate."
That annoyed him enough to get him to talk to her at least.
"Will you drop it?" He said, glaring at her from the wing of the ship, "It's not that big of a deal."
"It's a big deal to me. And to Leia, probably," she shot back.
Han didn't reply immediately, but she heard some muttering that sounded like some pretty creative swear words, "Will you just go and get on a transport please? The Empire's on its way, this whole base could be blown to bits any minute."
"I just don't understand how you can possibly leave now!" Alice burst out, exasperated and upset, "The morality of leaving the Rebellion aside, how can you just leave Leia? If you go now, you're never gonna see her again!"
There was a heavy pause, and she thought he might be considering her point when he poked his head back over the wing and said, "Stop trying to make me guilty, kid, it ain't gonna work. You know me, I'm a criminal. A mercenary. I look out for myself and nobody else."
"Well, that was very convincing," Alice scoffed, rolling her eyes, "yeah, I'm convinced."
"Alice?"
"Luke," Alice whipped round, panicking that he might have overheard their less than friendly conversation. Then she stopped, staring at him in surprise. "What are you doing?" He was wearing his orange flight suit and looked ready to charge into battle.
"I'm leading my squadron to hold off the Imperial ground troops. What about you, why aren't you on a transport yet?"
"See?" Han yelled, "If you're not going to listen to me, listen to Commander Skywalker."
Alice opened her mouth, then closed her eyes and counted to ten. When she opened them again, she said, in as calm a voice as she could manage, "I've been saying goodbye to Han."
Luke frowned, "What?"
Feeling a dangerous lump in her throat and a prickle in her eyes, Alice turned and called loudly into the ship, "Chewie! Come say goodbye to Luke!"
"Oh." His face fell a little, but he didn't seem surprised. Alice folded her arms and watched as Chewie, poking his head out of the Falcon, ran to give Luke a woolly hug.
"You take care of yourself, big guy," Luke said, ruffling the wookiee's fur.
Once Chewie had put him down, he stepped out from under the ship's wing to peer up at Han, who was crouched on the edge of the hunk of metal, drawn out of hiding by the sound of Luke's voice.
"Hey, kid. You alright?"
"Yeah."
A period of meaningful stares ensued here. Alice watched, bemused and strangely pained by the silent emotional glances passing between the two. God, could they be more of a couple?
After about two minutes had passed though, it was getting a bit much just standing there, and clearing her throat, Alice said, loudly, "Well. If we're all done hugging," she stared pointedly up at Han, "and kissing…?"
He glared down at her, clearly incensed, "Alright, what is it?"
"What?"
"Why are you so worked up about this?"
Alice said, with feigned innocence, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Can't let it go, huh?" He dropped down off the edge of the wing and stalked over to her, "You really need to get over yourself, kid."
She gaped at him, outraged, "I need to get over myself? What about you?" She placed a palm against his chest and shoved him away from her, "Everything always has to be about you, with your stupid jokes and your…kissing!"
"Calm down!" Luke said sharply, looking alarmed as he grabbed each of them by the shoulder and pressed them back a step.
Han shrugged Luke's hand away and pointed an accusatory finger in Alice's face, "You know, I think I know why you're upset, sweetheart."
"Oh?" Alice spat back, slapping his hand away, "Enlighten me, Captain."
"You wish I kissed you for you!"
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying, I think you liked it, sister!"
"Ha! That's the stupidest thing I've ever-!"
"You…kissed her?"
Alice and Han froze at once. Um…yeah. Forgot he wasn't there for that bit. Awkward…
Together, they turned guiltily to look at Luke. Alice could just feel the blush of shame creeping down her neck, and saw that, beneath his stubble, Han was rather on the pink side too.
"Um…yeah. He did. Yeah. But-"
"You know," Han said, glancing at Alice for support, where two seconds ago they'd been squabbling like cats, "it was just a…"
Alice picked up where he left off, gesturing awkwardly, "It was just one of those…um, friend…kisses."
"Oh." Luke looked at them both quietly, his expression damningly unreadable, "Right."
The awkwardness of the moment was compounded exponentially as somewhere nearby, probably in the adjacent section of the base, something exploded, sending a shockwave through the room and Alice tumbling straight into Han's arms.
Luke's jaw clenched, and as Alice and Han untangled themselves, he tucked his helmet more firmly under his arm, "I have to go. Alice, find Leia, she'll make sure you get out safely. And Han, fly safe, buddy."
"You too, kid," Han called, looking for once, extremely ashamed of himself.
Luke nodded, and turning on his heel, jogged away towards the exit.
What? That's it? Nope. No, I refuse to accept that as a goodbye. That was…unacceptable.
"Luke! Don't you dare leave without saying goodbye," she shot back at Han over her shoulder as she hurried after Luke. She couldn't help feeling, as Luke stopped but didn't turn to face her, that this day had gone from pretty good to bad, to absolutely terrible.
"Luke, listen, that thing with Han, it wasn't…he just did it to make Leia jealous. He and I aren't…I mean…" She trailed off, not quite certain how to finish her argument without resorting to some kind of extremely embarrassing confession.
Slowly, Luke turned around. "Alice, there isn't time to talk about this right now."
Alice cocked her head on one side. She didn't know why, but something about his expression, the way he couldn't quite meet her eyes, made her think that he was hiding something from her. She frowned, "Luke…?"
"Please, just get to a ship," he said, with an air of finality, "this place is coming down, and the Empire will be here soon." He leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss to her forehead, then left the way he'd came, head down as he ran.
Alice watched him go, feeling a delayed burst of adrenaline jolt through her. He's right, I've got to go and find Leia. Oh god, what if something's happened to her while I've been moping around?
She ran back to the Falcon, yelling as she went, "Han!"
He appeared immediately and she skidded to a halt in front of him, "I really have to go."
"I know," he agreed.
"So…well…"
They looked at each other, more than a little speechless. Alice ran a hand uncomfortably through her hair, rocking backwards and forwards on her toes. Han cleared his throat. Then they both said at the same time, "Sorry."
Alice laughed sheepishly, and patted Han on the arm, "Let's…not do this again."
"Good call," he said, rubbing at his cheek and not looking at her, "but jeez kid, you're almost more of a wildcat than Leia is."
"Thanks?" She said, tentatively.
"Friends?" Han asked.
Alice nodded, "Friends."
"Miss Alice?" She looked up and saw Threepio approaching, running as fast as his articulated joints would let him, "Princess Leia requests you join her in the control room. It really is rather urgent."
"Of course," Alice said, nodding, "I was just on my way. Well then." She glanced at Han and realised with a rush of sadness that he was leaving – this might well be the last time they saw each other. It was a big galaxy after all, they weren't likely to just run into each other. Trying to play it cool, she punched him lightly on the shoulder, "Goodbye. If we don't see each other again, I think you should know that you were the most annoying smuggler I've ever flown with."
"And you were one of the most annoying passengers I've ever smuggled," he replied.
They looked at each other for a moment, then Alice reached out and Han wrapped her in a hug warm and comforting enough to rival Chewie's. "Be careful out there, kid. It's a big, bad universe," he said, giving her a small squeeze.
Alice snorted, "Trust me, you don't have to tell me that. Tell Chewie goodbye for me. Come on, Threepio. Let's rock."
Alice could feel Han's eyes on her back as she walked away, and she had to struggle not to look back at him.
Come on, stay strong – you can do this. Putting aside the fact that you're saying goodbye to one of the four or so friends you have in the entire galaxy…
She marched through the base, reaching the command centre only to find Leia in the middle of a storm of chaos. Half of the ceiling of the room had collapsed, crushing several screens, and forcing Alice to clamber over piles of rubble to reach her friend. She felt ridiculously guilty: Leia could have been crushed while I was bickering with Han.
"Leia, I'm here, are you okay?"
Leia glanced up from the monitor she was leaning over, "Oh thank goodness, you're alright. I thought you would come back here when you'd spoken to the speeder pilots."
Alice shuffled awkwardly on the spot, "I was speaking with Han."
"Ah," Leia said, tightly.
"Leia…about what happened…"
"Don't worry about it, Alice," Leia interrupted, "now isn't the time." Déjà vu. "As much as I would like to punch Captain Solo in the face, we just need to make sure everyone gets out of here."
Alice gazed at her apprehensively, "Soo…what you're saying is…you're not going to kill me?"
There was another loud crunch, and a trickle of snow and dust pattered down above their heads. Leia grimaced, "At the rate we're taking fire, I may not have to."
"Excellent."
Thanks for reading and please review!
