"Doctor Chakwas?" asked the familiar accent of the female Cerberus Officer. She looked up from her terminal to see Miranda standing in the doorway, a datapad clasped in between her hands. For the first time she could remember, the woman appeared uneasy. Apprehensive. Even, dare she say it, nervous. Chakwas assumed it had something to do with whatever was on the datapad currently in her hands.
She beckoned the woman in, gesturing towards the seat on the opposite side of the desk. "How can I help, Miranda?"
The other woman took a seat and appeared to compose herself, taking a deep breath before she handed over the datapad. "I'm hoping you may be able to run your eye over this."
She nodded, taking the proffered datapad and started to read its contents. With each sentence she read, she felt her heart break slightly. She didn't have a lot of time for Cerberus. She had started to trust those she was surrounded with, but still kept her distance. But this… No-one should have to be given this sort of news. Certainly not a young female with so much of her life ahead of her. Someone who clearly desired what she was being denied. That was the only reason she'd be sitting in front of her now. She finished reading the information before placing the datapad down on her desk, looking at the woman sitting across from her.
"I'm sorry, Miranda," she said softly. The woman merely replied with a slightly sad smile. "But I'm unsure as to why you've come to me with this? The judgement appears sound."
"I'd like a second opinion, Doctor. Your opinion," Miranda replied.
"I'm flattered you would come to me with this, Miranda. And although I like to think I'm a jack of all trades, this is something that is, to be honest, outside my area of expertise."
"I understand that, Doctor. But I'll be honest with you in return. You're the only one I trust coming to with this. I respect you and your position. And I wouldn't trust anyone else alive with this."
Chakwas thought for a moment, taken aback by her revelation. She clearly wants help, Karin. And she's come to you. And she says she trusts you. Perhaps you can give a bit in return. She nodded as she made up her mind. "Very well, Miranda. I'll see what I can do. Give me some time to carry out research and I'll want to run tests eventually."
"That won't be a problem."
"Would it be okay to involve Professor Solus in this?"
Miranda shook her head. "I'd rather keep this between just you and me. Not even the Commander is aware of this. As you can probably tell, this is something intensely personal and I'd rather not have too many people know."
"Of course, Miranda. You have my word that this won't leave the room."
Miranda stood up and started to walk out of the room, not before stopping as the door opened, turning back towards her. "Thank you, doctor."
She nodded. "I wouldn't thank me yet, Miranda, but you're welcome."
Chakwas delved into her research, using the information off the datapad as a base to eventually build up her knowledge of the condition Miranda suffered. She then added that to the file she had started in regards to the officer when she first arrived on board the Normandy, and basically started to think about how her genetic make-up would affect her ability in regards to a family. I don't see any other outcome, Miranda. It just doesn't seem possible… She shook her head of the negative thought and continued to research, but couldn't help think that Miranda would eventually just have to face facts, no matter how heart-breaking it may seem.
A week later and she called Miranda back into the office for a series of tests, confident that she had sufficient knowledge to at least give her a valid second opinion. Miranda seemed pleased that the doctor had at least kept her word, but she didn't appear her usual confident self. Chakwas could understand as she was hardly a beacon of positive energy herself. She wasn't just going through the motions. She wanted to give Miranda good news. But she knew, in her heart, that the possibility of that was very slight. Near impossible.
It would take a miracle.
And despite the resurrection of Commander, it appears that even god himself would not allow any further miracles. Forty-eight hours later and she called the Cerberus officer back into the med-bay. She gestured towards the empty seat across from her desk, placing her hands together on the desk in front of her, trying to keep her face impassive.
"Well, Doctor, what is the news?" Miranda asked. Chakwas could hear the lack of hope in her voice. The operative appeared almost resigned to her fate already.
She didn't exactly know how to begin. Or really what to say. She figured Miranda knew what she was going to say. But that didn't make it any easier. She cleared her throat before looking directly at her. "I'm sorry, Miranda, but the original verdict was right."
"I see…," Miranda replied, trailing off and looking away for a moment.
"Would you like any more details? Perhaps an understanding of why? I've done my best to ascertain why it would be impossible. I don't know if that would make it any easier but…," she trailed off herself.
"No… No. It's okay… Thanks…," Miranda replied again. Chakwas thought she was going to stay strong, simply stand up and walk out.
She was surprised when, instead, Miranda burst into tears.
Chakwas immediately tapped at her terminal, locking the door while frosting over the windows looking into the med-bay to give privacy as she rolled her chair around to sit beside the heart-broken woman. She didn't say anything. What could she say? I'm sorry, again and again? She didn't have a family or children of her own. But that was through her own choice. It wasn't the genetic gods telling her she couldn't.
"So much for being perfect," Miranda finally stated, her tone laced with bitterness, wiping at her eyes with one of her sleeves.
"You can't blame yourself for this, Miranda."
"I don't. I blame my father, if I should even called him that," she replied vehemently, "He's the one who created me. He wanted me to be 'perfect'. Yet look at all the faults. There's a long bloody list of them. And now I can't even do the one thing I want to do. My entire life has been to fulfil the desires of other people. I was to be my father's legacy. I'm nothing but a tool of the Illusive Man, to be used and eventually discarded once I've outlived my usefulness. This was the one thing I may have eventually wanted for myself, and it's been taken from me through no fault of my own."
"You wanted a child?" she asked, not without some surprise.
Miranda picked up on the tone, laughing bitterly. "I don't know. It's something I've thought about at times. Whether I would have made a good mother or not is open to debate. I'm sure there are many who would think I would have made an awful mother." She laughed bitterly again, before her voice broke. "But I would have loved to have eventually found out," she added quietly.
Chakwas didn't know what else to do except throw an arm around her shoulders, letting the officer lean in close as she continued to quietly weep for a few minutes. "You know the one group you haven't mentioned in all this, Miranda?"
Miranda lifted herself from her shoulder. "Cerberus?" Chakwas nodded. Miranda shook her head. "No. I'd rather not and I don't think he would help."
She was surprised again. "Why on earth would they not help you? I mean, clearly you're one of their most talented operatives. That's the impression I'm left with by everything the Commander has told me. And they have spent a lot of money bringing the Commander back to life, after all."
"Because there would be no cost benefit to them helping me," Miranda replied, again a tone of bitterness that she picked up, and again surprised her, considering she was talking about her employers, and a group she appeared undoubtedly loyal to.
"There's something else isn't there?"
Miranda lowered her head. "I just don't want them to know," she said quietly.
Chakwas didn't quite understand why she wouldn't but didn't pursue the argument. It was clearly a sore point for the woman. This whole episode did leave her slightly intrigued about Miranda, though. She hadn't much to do with her during their time on the Normandy so far. At this moment, though, Chakwas herself felt quite… motherly herself as she tried to soothe the heart-broken woman. Soon Miranda nodded that she was okay, muttering her thanks, so Chakwas moved back around to the other side of the desk, and leaning forward as she considered the brunette on the opposite side.
"Do you have any other family, Miranda?"
"I have a sister. Shepard helped me with a personal issue a while back involving her. I guess that may have been the thing to really set this off."
"How do you mean?"
"My sister, Oriana, didn't know I existed. When I escaped from my father's clutches, I took Oriana with me. I approached Cerberus offering my services, in exchange for them keeping her safe. They helped place her with a family who would give her everything she would need. She would have a real family. A real life. That was the only thing I have ever wanted for her. Normality."
"Did something happen to your sister?"
"She and I were betrayed by my only friend. The one contact I kept from my old life. I never thought…" She shook head and sighed. "Shepard helped me regarding this betrayal. And… he convinced me to let Oriana know she had a big sister out there, looking after her. And I guess it made me realise that I would eventually like a family of my own one day. A real family. You know… husband, wife, 2.5 kids." She laughed, slightly bitterly again. "I know, it all sounds stupid. Nothing but a pipe dream." She sighed. "It was a nice dream to have though."
"Nothing wrong with dreams, Miranda. We all have dreams and goals of things we would like to achieve. Although I am intrigued as to who you think the husband would be. Do you have someone out there in the galaxy waiting for you?"
Chakwas was sure that Miranda actually blushed before responding. "Can I be honest?"
"Of course. We'll keep the same rule. Nothing leaves this room."
"I've done everything I can to get Shepard's attention, but he doesn't appear interested. I'm left feeling… perplexed. There was nothing in his dossier about him being involved with anyone else. I mean, he was dead for two years so I can only assume anyone he may have been interested in would have moved on. We were aware of the interest the asari and Chief Williams had in him on the old Normandy. I've been upfront in my own attraction to him but he's dismissed it out of hand, saying he wanted to keep things strictly professional."
Chakwas made sure she gave away nothing as Miranda spoke. She didn't know how the woman would react if she gave away who Shepard was actually interested in. Would probably kill the poor woman after all the information she's taken in today. "You think he'd make a good father?"
Miranda shrugged. "Perhaps. But he's a fit, healthy young man. Any offspring he were to produce would be almost perfect."
So it sounds like that it wouldn't be a child out of love then. Your own legacy perhaps? "Any other candidates?"
"Well, I was involved with Jacob a while back," Miranda replied, though Chakwas was sure she was embarrassed by that revelation, "But he ended it rather abruptly. I don't blame him, if I'm honest. It was a… difficult situation at the time. We're just colleagues now. It's better this way."
Chakwas was silent for a moment as she thought. Clearly Miranda was a self-confident young woman, but she needed guidance regarding this issue. "You should realise something, Miranda. You have many years ahead of you. As you've stated before, you'll live far longer than the average human being. Medical science is always improving. Don't forget, there are cures for diseases today that once resulted in the death of millions. There's always hope for the future."
Miranda nodded. "Hmmm. I guess you could be right, Doctor."
"And right now probably isn't the best time to get worked up about this. Although this is rightfully an important topic for you, perhaps, just perhaps, you should let this rest for the time being and focus on the mission at hand. Focus on the threat of the Reapers. And worry about this… afterwards."
Miranda actually smiled. "I can see why Shepard comes in here for advice, Doctor."
She tried her best not to blush at his mention. "I'm not just his physician. We became good friends during out time together chasing Saren. I don't usually get that close to people on a ship, but there was something… special about my time on the Normandy. Not just regarding the Commander, but everyone who served on board."
"So I've read, Doctor. It's why Cerberus was so interested in getting Shepard on board for this mission. And why we wanted the likes of yourself and Joker to support him." Miranda stood up. "You have my thanks." She gestured with the datapad. "I'll put this someplace safe for the future."
Chakwas just grinned slightly in return as the brunette woman walked out of the med-bay.
