Ah geez. It's been a hectic week for me with all that load of crap and school work I have to do to prepare myself for the last term of this year. In the meantime, I've made a new side story called 'Apprehension' based on the famous video game 'Among Us'. You can check it out in my profile.
Chapter 14 – Truths Out, Eyes Opened
Clay's POV, 29/07 (1 am)
Here I was.
Back in the dark world.
I couldn't see anything.
No people.
No bunk beds.
No walls.
Nothing.
I looked around.
"Oh no," I thought. "Not again…"
Again, I didn't know why everything was completely…dark. Even thought there was no light, I was able to see my body in full light.
"Dark Wolf…"
I looked behind to see some kind of dark shadow flying towards me. This time, I stood in my spot and let the shadow grab me up. It transformed into a hand and grabbed me around my waist.
"Dark Wolf…"
"Hello, you again," I said trying to act confident.
"It was nice to see you again after the past six months. We haven't seen each other for a while. Can you…I don't know…let me go?"
"W-What do you mean?"
"Don't play dumb, here!" the shadow roared as its grip tightened on me. "You almost had your chance to strike that stupid bird down! And why did you choose to listen to hippy wolf and relax?!"
"I'm not a monster!" I yelled, feeling the hand squeezed my body. "I'm not that 'Dark Wolf' you keep referring to. It's not worth killing someone if I don't know what their problem is."
"'THEIR PROBLEM'?! Who cares about them?! They are just so insecure!"
"And so are YOU!" I growled.
"THAT IS BECAUSE WE ARE STRONGER THAN THOSE LITTLE FREAKS! I want to let go off the anger and show the world how WE FEEL! Show how much pain we went through! They deserve to die because they don't have a care or a need in this pathetic world! Just why is it with you to refuse and back down ANY CHANCE to fight back?!"
"It's not right!" I said. "Yes, even though they can act mean, it's not right to murder! I don't want to be an enemy of anyone and I can't bear the thought of getting someone hurt. There's more to life than killing – as if there needs to be more monsters in the universe! I'm only intending to know why they do these sort of things and I will make my decision. And what do you mean by 'we'?"
The shadow just looked up at me before letting out a demonic laugh, shaking violently.
"You are SO SOFT, Dark Wolf!" hissed the shadow. "I'm the darker side of you, so I control all the negative feelings that you keep inside you! I want to let it out, so that we won't have to suffer and lie down on the floor to die! I am made to make you a creature born of hunger, anger and darkness."
"And will that solve ANYTHING?!" I said.
"Then how come you never tell anyone about your emotions?! That doesn't solve ANYTHING as well. But, you are somewhat right. Why would you trust on strangers you never know of? Why would you trust people who would just yell at you for your mistakes? Why would you trust people who are just so darn carefree to care about the real world? They will never understand the pain you went through."
I was silent. Maybe it was right.
"And besides," continued the shadow. "Once they see the REAL PAIN on your right arm, it will be all over for you."
I gulped. I looked at my right arm. In this dream, the bandage wasn't there. The blackness was travelling through my arm and up towards my shoulder.
"N-no!" I said. "Y-you can't. I don't want to hurt anyone!"
The shadow laughed. "Now, that's the problem. Your concerns make you SOFT, Dark Wolf. Why not just give it into the darkness?"
"No! I won't!"
"But you are gradually doing so. You know that once they see this and your true power, they will abandon you. They will think you will be a threat to them and they will kick you out. They may even end your miserable life. You will never get to see your brother as well again."
"You really think so?"
"I know so. BUT if you really want to make it right, are you going to let those scums take advantage of you and throw you around like a broken doll or are you going to do SOMETHING about it?! You should have accepted Infinite's offer to join the Eggman Empire. That will allow you to burn the world to cinders."
"You might be right, but I just want to be good! I just want to be safe! I just want to have my brother back! My home!"
The shadow squeezed me harder. "I will tell you this again, Dark Wolf. Soon, you will be filled with sadness, anger, pain, stress and anxiety. You will finally know how it feels like to be weak. You will take it all out on everyone. You will become…the ULTIMATE DARK WOLF."
At this, the shadow suddenly absorbed into my body.
Everything was dark again.
"You will know when will be the time to let that monster out."
I woke up from my bed, nearly screaming. I looked around, seeing that I was back in my bunk room. I started to tremble, remembering the dream.
"You will know when will be the time to let that monster out."
I placed my head into my hands and started crying.
Weeping.
No one heard me. As if they needed to know.
I stood up and headed to the bathroom, feeling an urge to wash my face.
As soon as I went in, I walked to the nearest sink and started splashing water onto my poor, dirty face.
I looked up and saw my reflection. My face was nearly a mess, but still looked perfect. The lush turquoise fur on my skin. The sharp and white canines of my teeth. I looked at myself through those poor golden eyes, nearly dull and hopeless. They were turning…yellow. That was indeed strange.
At that moment, I hated my appearance.
Suddenly, something hit my head. My eyes widened and I clutched my stomach upon remembering the cruel words I was given.
"Why not? You're all weak and the strong should live. You – on the other hand – are weak. AND look pathetic. You don't belong here. You don't belong ANYWHERE. You SHOULDN'T even exist."
"Armies always want to have the best soldiers they have. Even though they just said that age or experience doesn't matter, they are still hiding the fact that you have to be strong. I don't think they would want anyone who can't fight. From what I saw when lifting those dumbbells, you can't fight. You look like one of them. You have the strength of a woman."
"But that DOESN'T mean you get to make more mistakes!"
"TAKE THAT BACK, IDIOT!"
"YOU ARE AS BLIND AS A GLASSES-WEARING RED WOLF!"
"STOP!" I yelled, trying to block those words away.
However, I could still hear them.
Hatred.
Mocking me.
I looked up to see my reflection. Some stupid wolf I was. Some stupid wolf.
"No…" I said out loud. "I'm…I'm not…just…why God…why…why did you let my brother be taken away…why did you let me never see my parents…why did you let those people die…why didn't you do ANYTHING to stop the war…why did you let those people be mean to me…w…w…what did I do wrong to get some kind of thing?! Why do I have to be some butt monkey everyone can chew on?! Why do I have to struggle through life?! What did I even do wrong?! I didn't do anything to make all of this happen! I AM JUST A 14 YEARS OLD SINGLE LONE WOLF STRUGGLING THROUGH LIFE, WANTING TO HAVE HIS BROTHER AND HIS HOME BACK! I DID NOTHING WRONG TO RECEIVE THIS KIND OF CRAP! I'M NOT PROUD OF DOING THOSE STUPID MISTAKES I DID BEFORE, BUT WHAT DID I DO WRONG IN THE FIRST PLACE?! JUST WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS STUPID WORLD?! JUST WHY GOD?! WHY DID YOU TURN DEAF ON ME?! WHAT DID I DO WRONG?! WHY AM I DOING HERE?! JUST WHY?!"
I was screaming at the top of my lungs and tears rolled down my face. I raised my head and let out another howl of agony and pure pain. Unable to help myself, I slumped onto the ground and started to cry bitterly. I didn't care if I was using up all my energy as I curled myself into a miserable ball on the floor.
Stupid. Failure. Mistake.
That was what I was. Again, I continued to cry in anger, sadness, stress, fear and anxiety; pure pain.
It was hurtful.
"Rookie?" said a familiar voice.
I looked up to see Sonic at the door, his hands on his hips.
"W…what…what are you doing?" I said, my voice cracking.
"I was about to ask you that same question," said Sonic. "Just came here to take a leak, but that was when I heard screaming. You nearly blew down the HQ down."
I noticed that he was trying to make a joke, but it didn't cheer me up. He saw the bandage on my right arm.
"What happened to your arm?" he asked.
"Just an accident," I said bluntly. "Nothing important."
"OK. I won't bother around that issue. I want to talk with you around the OTHER ISSUE."
"Huh?" I said before remembering the fight I got into. "Why?"
"I notice that you are hiding something. And that is what I can't allow."
I looked away. "I-It's nothing."
"Nothing, huh? Then why did you blew off steam when Mecha said 'red wolf with glasses'?"
The memory of Belt flashed over my eyes.
I stood up, trembling.
"I-It's nothing," I lied. "I…I don't like to be referred to that."
"C'mon," said Sonic sternly. "I have met liars, bastards, crooks and tricksters the entire time! I always know when people lie and when they try to hide something I NEED to know. Look, I can be a bit pushy, but you're just loitering around, so why don't you just tell me what's the problem?"
"If so, why didn't you ask me that in the first place? Why can't you just ask MECHA?"
"You see, when you saved me and got back to the HQ, I wasn't sure when was the right time to see if you were OK. I thought it would be best to see what was bothering you during the mission, but not your life. Besides, I don't know where Mecha is, so I decided to ask you first."
I looked down.
"Look," said Sonic. "You are not the first. Everyone in the Resistance AND all the people around the world are trapped in a huge maze made by Eggman and Infinite. We are all trying to stop him and find the missing key, but the problem is that we dwell too much about what happened in the past. You got to move on."
"What's the point?" I said, looking at my reflection. "I'm a monster. I hurt my teammates and they probably hate me."
"You are not a monster," pointed out Sonic. "You are just angry. And Bubblegum, Emerald and Sebastian don't hate you. They are just worried of you. Bubblegum told me that she didn't mean to say rude things to you; she was just frustrated and all. Like YOU."
"How can you relate to me with that cat? I'm nothing like her. I don't brood around and my vest doesn't make me some kind of Goth!"
"True, but you two…you two have problems. Problems you face in life and never really get the chance to move on. You problems might be different, but you two can't just stop thinking about your mistakes. You are believing too much that they make you who you are when they don't. Bubblegum has been bullied many times. This is what made her to be what she is today. But she has friends and need to learn to accept herself. You – on the other hand – don't have any friends to start with."
I was taken aback by this. I looked away, not making eye contact with Sonic.
"You like to be alone and blend with the crowd so easily. I understand. You're afraid. I guess that you feel like everyone is a stranger and that there is no one to trust. But you have to tell someone about your problems. Again, you are not a monster. What I see is a wolf child who is so confused, scared, upset and was hurting so badly that he thinks that it is best to keep them all to himself to not hurt others or being judged. If you continue to keep it all to yourself, you will still be hurting."
He placed a hand onto my shoulder.
"The way to deal with pain is not to keep it inside you, but show it outside you. Don't inflict it on others, but instead tell someone about the pain you are going through. They may be able to help you. Please. Tell me. Everyone bleeds the same, so maybe you are not so different to the others. Let me hear you."
I turned to look at Sonic shocked. I realized that the reason why I let the pain get to me was because I kept it to myself. I was scared of telling others. Scared that they wouldn't understand me or judge me. I was in a world of strangers. But…I really wanted to find my brother...and the best way to deal with it was to tell someone I learn to trust.
"OK…" I said. "I'm in."
"Are you sure?"
"If I say it now, I won't say it anymore…just please don't tell this to anyone yet. But…I want you to tell them because I can't do this alone."
"What is it?"
"Well…"
I trailed off as I remembered Belt getting captured.
I gasped and clutched my stomach. My eyes widened open.
"Rookie?" asked Sonic. "Are you OK?"
The people who died in front of me flashed over my eyes.
"Rookie?"
"CLAY!"
That was Belt calling for me. All the terrible memories filled my mind. It was too much and I wrapped my arms around myself, crying.
I was crying hysterically. I couldn't take it…but I have to say it.
"Rookie?" said Sonic, coming close to me. "What's wrong?"
I turned to the mirror and looked at my reflection; my eyes turning red due to crying too much.
"I miss him," I bawled. "I really miss him. Every day. And I'm mad at myself for letting him go. I…I grew up in an isolated place…I only lived with my older brother…Belt…he…he was the nicest, smartest guy you would ever know…I don't know what happened to our parents…and Belt wouldn't tell me what happen…one day…we were attacked. We ran away from the Eggman robots and…they kidnapped Belt…I remember him…screaming at me to run…survive. That was the last time I had seen him."
I stopped when I hiccupped. I swallowed and continued.
"I found my way to Forest Tournament Town where my teammates lived. There…I saw him…Infinite…he killed those people…I will never forget their cries…their screams…their bodies. I tried to stand up against him while giving a girl time to escape…I managed to let the girl run…but I was unable to stop Infinite…he called me pathetic…weak…and I shouldn't…exist."
I stopped again, trying to control my sobbing as tears rolled down my cheeks.
"I had recurring nightmares of watching Belt die or being hunted by monsters. Just now…I had a nightmare where…some kind of shadow taunted me and tempted me to join the Eggman Empire…and kill everyone. It said that once everyone knows my 'true power'…I will never be accepted. I don't know what is going on…but it might be the rings I wear. I'm not sure if it is true or not. I isolated myself from everyone for 6 months and that was when I joined the Resistance.
I took a deep breath and my depression was suddenly replaced with frustration.
"Bubblegum…Mecha…they are SO hard on me. Talking me down about the mistakes I made…I thought I deserve that…because I messed up on our first mission. But…Bubblegum was just frustrated like me…wanting to keep the world safe…wanting to save others…I really want to call her a friend…but I'm not sure if I'm ready to do so…I really dislike Mecha…if I could…I would ask him why he was doing all those horrible things…but I guess I will never find out because he's always so self-centered and self-absorbed in himself!"
I turned to Sonic.
"Do you know what the saddest thing is?" I said, taking out the glasses I planned to give Belt a long time ago from my vest. "It's nearly Belt's birthday this week…and his birthday is on the day when Eggman will wipe us out…I might never be able to give him these glasses…I keep them as a reminder of my brother…but he's gone…I never get to see him again…there was no one I could trust…only except myself."
I placed the glasses back in my vest pocket.
"I have thoughts of ending my own life, but I decided not to. I don't want anyone worrying about. You…you helped me…you helped me dig out of that hole I put myself in. Even when both of us are in despair, you encouraged me and those words you say helped me save those civilians. And if it wasn't for Bubblegum, I would have got those poor people killed. So yeah…I am really grateful for you two to help me. I like you as a friend…I also like Bubblegum as the sister I never have…I just want to see my brother."
I trailed off as I continued to sob. To my surprise, I felt Sonic slowly pulling me in an embrace. He patted me on the back.
"You know," said Sonic, his voice nearly wavering. "I lost my family too. My home was attacked by Eggman. I don't know what happened to them…I never saw them again. I did blame myself for not helping them, but I learn that I should move on. It's all Eggman's fault for letting us be in this mess, right? After all, he wants to show his 'passion'."
I sniffed. "Honestly, I'm not sure WHOSE fault it is."
"When I heard you ranting, I heard that you were blaming this 'God'."
"W-what? N-no! It's not what you think! I'm just so…angry at him."
"I don't know what kind of god you trust in, but I know that you shouldn't be mad at any god. It's NOBODY'S fault to put it simple. Don't be so hard on yourself. I know that we are in a war…it never changes…but it can if you have hope. It's how you choose to deal with it. You are not pathetic OR weak. You just let your negative emotions get to you."
He placed a hand onto my chest.
"It was you. You are the one who make you who you are. I know that the world want people to be what the world wants them to be, but everyone here admires the good in each other. What I see in you is goodness. Light. Maybe dark, but your light is strong. That makes you who you are and makes you stronger. You are stronger than you think you are. Believe me."
I cried harder feeling touched that somebody DO understand me. I never thought that the greatest hero of all time would be a good friend to me. Someone that can let me cry. Someone who know I was broken both outside and inside. Someone to repair my broken shell. Someone who can put me back together.
"I promise that I will help you find your brother," said Sonic. "It is important for siblings to stick together. That's how I met Tails. But…you got to tell everyone about it tomorrow after Operation Big Wave. I will tell, but I think it's best if you tell everyone the truth. After all, it's YOUR brother. You can't just hide it and let him die."
I let go off him and tried to smile. However, my frown still remained.
"T-thank you so much, Sonic the Hedgehog," I said gratefully. "It is nice to talk about my problems. I will never forget this moment."
"Your welcome…Rookie the Wolf," said Sonic smiling.
We both chuckled at that joke even though I didn't smile. I said goodnight to him and walked back to my room.
That was when I noticed my Cyan Wisp sitting on my bed. She looked…depressed.
"Hmm?" I whispered to her. "Are you OK?"
She hovered upwards and turned to me. She let out a sigh before giving me a note. I looked at it and used my night vision to see it clearly since the room was dark.
Rookie. I wanted to tell you something I've never told anyone before. Ever since you chose me, I felt pleased. I feel some kind of connection between us when we first met. It was as if I found a friend. I have been loyal to you and I'm hoping that you can do the same.
The thing is…I saw the fight you had with Mecha. I was scared and I wasn't sure if I should stop you. When you nearly took your own life, I had to come out of your Wispon for heaven's sake. The thing that shocked me is that you lost a brother. You…miss him, right?
…I don't want to think of this again, but I'm forcing myself to do so. Before the war, I lived my entire life on Planet Wisp. I had my own family. I know that all the Wisps are like a family, but I stick close to four friends that I consider as my brothers and sisters. I loved every single one of them. They were all I have.
However, when Eggman took over, he kidnapped my entire family. By luck, I managed to get away. I stayed in the shadows to avoid being captured, hoping that my family will still be alive. However, I was wrong.
After Sonic saved my planet and drove Eggman off, I noticed that something happened ti my family. Tails spotted 5 Cyan Wisps lying dead on the ground. Their energy were sucked up, leaving them lifeless.
This was due to Eggman experimenting on them with a dangerous machine. It failed for Eggman, but it destroyed my family's lives.
I was COMPLETELY shattered.
Ever since then, I fell into what you call a 'depression'. I was upset by the fact that my family was dead and I cowardly hid away. I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye to them. I cried a lot, I tended to push others away and I nearly even took my own life.
How? I drowned myself in some ponds. At first, I couldn't stand it, but staying in water 'helped' me forget about my family. It felt good to distract myself from my pain. However, as I soon became more prone to drowning myself, many other Wisps had to drag me out of the ponds.
Even though they tried to help me, I refused all their offers. I moved to Earth to try to be away from the place my family died. I just lied there on the grass…wanting the Earth to just swallow me up and I would be free from all the misery I had to endure…and then I saw…a turquoise wolf. With the same matching color like me as a Cyan Wisp. He was just standing on that field. Beside me. He was smiling with those kind gold eyes. And it was right there, I could feel it.
Even though I realized that I was dreaming, it was the first time in years that I felt something good…and I knew that it was guiding me. It was my future. I was going to be fine. Despite being in a cruddy mood, I knew that as soon as I met that wolf, I would be fine.
I decided to join the Resistance…so that I would die someday during the war. I began to notice how much I distanced myself from everyone else and how selfish I was. It was during my time waiting for a partner to be with me and I never had anyone for the past 6 months. Sure there were other Wisps to talk with, but…it was lonely.
And then, I felt the Wispon I was in being picked up…and thrown to someone. It was when I felt my energy being used to save others…that I realized that you picked me. I went out to see you…and I was happy. That was why I bounced around you. Cyan Wisps are known to be energetic and when I met you, I felt as if all my happiness is back together. To talk with someone again.
I know this sounds weird, but I have a bit of a crush on you. I'm kind of obsessed with you. Let's just keep it platonic. I want to be your friend, but I noticed that you were struggling. I felt as if it was my job to help those in need just like how I needed help. You are in your worst and it really hurt me to see you struggling. I feel helpless seeing you like that, so the best thing I can do is to tell you that you are not alone in this.
If you need someone, you know that I'm around to help you pick you up. I can help you try to find your brother. That is the least I can do after I lost my siblings. Thank you for reading this.
I didn't know what to say. I thought that this Cyan Wisp had a good life before, but she lost her family. I was surprised that she liked me and felt pretty happy when she first saw me. Reading this letter nearly made me break into tears again.
I looked back at my Wisp to see her sitting on my bed with a faraway look. I walked up to her and patted her on the head.
"Thank you for caring about me," I whispered. "I'm sorry about what happened to your family. You…you don't have to help me find my brother."
She shook her head as if saying 'I'm still going to help you' before nuzzling into my chest. I chuckled a bit and hugged her back.
Knowing that Sonic, my Wisp and the Sapphire Squad were aware of my brother's disappearance, I felt nearly confident enough to tell the rest of the Resistance about my brother. I wanted to rescue Belt and it was nearly time for me to speak up. I just hoped that this would help me get over my demons. Hopefully, I might be able to take away this 'Dark Wolf' curse.
Comfort was all I need.
Mecha's POV
Being cooped in a tiny room has its effects.
I refused to come out and I had been sulking around in silence, so I was starving. I felt pretty dirty.
When I decided to stand up, I noticed that the Yellow Wisp was still sitting on my head. He wasn't sleeping or moving around. He was just staring at me.
I didn't know how long I was in that room until I came out. It was late at night. Slowly without waking anyone up, I tiptoed to the kitchen and grabbed a small salad bowl. I was on a strict diet, but it was better than nothing. Better than junk food, my opinion. I gave some to my Wisp, but I didn't see how he ate the leaves. I didn't care.
After finishing eating, I washed the bowl and started to head back to the bunk rooms. When I entered the hall, I heard talking from the male bathroom. Curiously, I peeked through the door to see a teary Rookie talking to Sonic.
Something didn't look right.
"C'mon," said Sonic sternly. "I have met liars, bastards, crooks and tricksters the entire time! I always know when people lie and when they try to hide something I NEED to know. Look, I can be a bit pushy, but you're just loitering around, so why don't you just tell me what's the problem?"
"If so, why didn't you ask me that in the first place?" questioned Clay. "Why can't you just ask MECHA?"
"You see, when you saved me and got back to the HQ, I wasn't sure when was the right time to see if you were OK. I thought it would be best to see what was bothering you during the mission, but not your life. Besides, I don't know where Mecha is, so I decided to ask you first."
I was feeling tired and in need of rest, but I wanted to know what was going on. Ever since seeing Rookie, I had my suspicion on him due to his rings and his mood changes. I listened for a while, but what really caught me was this:
"The way to deal with pain is not to keep it inside you," explained Sonic. "But show it outside you. Don't inflict it on others, but instead tell someone about the pain you are going through. They may be able to help you. Please. Tell me. Everyone bleeds the same maybe you are not so different to the others. Let me hear you."
The next thing that happened was unexpected.
Rookie cried and explained that he lost his brother and wanted to find his remaining family so badly. His brother was BELT COLOURZ. The red wolf with glasses.
I gulped. I remembered that back in town before, I bumped into Belt two times and always pushed him to the ground. I would mock him as Belt grumbled away. I would say that I was proud, but…I wasn't. I wasn't REALLY proud of what I did. I stopped when during the second time, Belt snapped back at me.
No wonder why Rookie snapped when I mentioned Belt.
The whole thing Rookie said was awful. I just watched from the shadows as Rookie rambled about seeing Infinite for the first time, being alone for so long, had recurring nightmares, joining the Resistance and seeing Sonic and Bubblegum as his friends. There was one thing that made my heart nearly stop.
"I really dislike Mecha…if I could…I would ask him why he was doing all those horrible things…but I guess I will never find out because he always so self-centered and self-absorbed in himself!" said Rookie bitterly.
My mouth opened slowly. What? Did he said that he WANTED to help me?
I shook my head.
"No," I thought. "That can be true. That can't. No one understands me. No will ever wanted to listen to me after the things I did."
And yet, I was self-centered and self-absorbed, as I knew about that already.
As the conservation went on, it finally ended. I – who had been listening to it the WHOLE TIME – was shocked by what I heard. Quickly, I hid behind a crate before Sonic and Rookie came out. They said 'goodnight' to each other before going back to their respective bunk rooms.
I sighed in relief. Nobody caught me.
Sighing in relief, I slowly made my way out and watched Rookie head inside. For some reason, I…smiled. I got to admit…it was nice for Sonic to comfort Rookie. But…that only made me feel sad. I walked inside the bathroom.
"Is…is this how it feels like…?" I thought. "To have…someone who can understand you?"
I remembered what Sebastian and Sonic said.
"Look…I'm…I'm always available when you need someone to cry on…I won't judge you…I'm sorry of how much you have to go through…I just want to be your brother…I…I love you as a friend…you don't have to say it back, though…"
"The way to deal with pain is not to keep it inside you, but show it outside you. Don't inflict it on others, but instead tell someone about the pain you are going through. They may be able to help you. Please. Tell me. Everyone bleeds the same maybe you are not so different to the others. Let me hear you."
I sighed and adjusted my goggles…or at least where my goggles where. I nearly forgot that I gave them to Bubblegum under the belief that I didn't deserve them.
"They won't understand me," I thought. "Not from what I went through. How can someone feel sorry for a mistake like me? Nobody will talk to me after the things I did. If only my parents didn't split up, that wouldn't make me who I am today."
I looked at myself in the mirror with the lights out and only one light shining on me and the sink mirror. On the glass, I saw a turquoise bird with a large scratch over his right eye. The one that represented his scar. It was dark red, but it was healing.
Ugly.
That was what made me a mistake. Many people see scars as something to make fun of. Zach did make fun of me for that.
I looked at myself in the mirror, but I couldn't stand seeing myself – a pathetic loser. Did I feel regretful what I did? I didn't know that time. I wasn't even sure if I was being sincere or pretending to be.
I was a mess.
I slowly touched my scar before slowly looking down.
My Yellow Wisp floated in front of me. He squeaked in concern.
"I'm fine," I lied. "I'm not in a good mood."
He slowly flew towards me…and gently rubbed my scar. I winced.
"P-please…" I said. "Just don't."
My Yellow Wisp sighed and sat on my head again. I shrugged and yawned.
Needing to get some rest, I walked away. I looked back at the mirror one last time before turning the light off.
"I am such a mistake," I thought. "And I will always be one."
Clay's POV (at 5 am)
Well…today was the day.
Operation Big Wave – or whatever the heck it was called – started on that day. I had to wake up VERY early at 5 am due to needing breakfast. To my surprise, I had a dreamless sleep after that talk with Sonic, but I was still in a cruddy mood.
The tension between me and the others was extreme. I separated myself from the others and to my surprise, so did Bubblegum and Mecha. I refused to make eye contact with anyone while Bubblegum looked at me in concern and Mecha just stared aimlessly in a sour mood.
I couldn't really blame them for being in a state like that. I was also involved in the fight and I had no idea what REALLY happened or who started it.
Well, almost.
Needing some time alone, I just stuffed the rations into my mouth and walked through the hallways. My Cyan Wisp was happy as ever and flew in front of me, so I decided to follow her. However, I didn't really know where she was going and that was how I stumbled into the meeting room. Sonic and Knuckles were there.
"Oh," said Knuckles. "It's you."
"Are you OK, buddy?" asked Sonic. "You look pale."
"Couldn't be better," I said shrugging.
"Well, Rookie," said Knuckles. "I meant to tell you that there-"
Suddenly, there was an incoming message from the monitor. It was from the White Squad.
"This is Captain Diamond from the White Squad!" said a voice from the computer. "Can you hear me?"
"We can hear you fine," said Knuckles. "What's the problem?"
"I-It's Shadow! He is tearing through our troops! I need reinforcements!"
"Shadow…" I said.
"What?" said Sonic. "I...There is ANOTHER Shadow? The one I saw at San Francisco was a fake."
"Maybe Eggman did something to Shadow," said Knuckles. "Whatever's going on, we need to find some answers."
"Please hurry. I'm not sure if I can make it. Just to note that he is making his way to the Sunset Heights bunker and…and I'm on my own. So whatever you do, please keep those people safe-what the-? No, no, NO! Get back! Stop that! That's not funny! Don't make me use m-"
He was cut off by a loud screech before the connection was lost.
The White Squad was no more.
"Drat!" said Knuckles. "They are gone!"
"Is there any other squad you can send?" I said.
"No! We can't spare any squads from here and some of them are in tight positions!"
"Then I will go out there and find out what the hell is going on," said Sonic. "Besides, I battled Shadow many times. I'm sure that he will be happy to see me."
I rolled my eyes.
Knuckles sighed.
"If you think it is best to," said Knuckles. "Then go ahead. But I will send a squad to help you."
"Nah. It's fine. Besides, I'm not sure how the Resistance soldiers will take on him. Good luck, everyone!"
He ran off leaving me, my Wisp and Knuckles alone in the meeting room.
"Want to bet for $50?" I said sarcastically. "I think Sonic's butt is going to be kicked."
"Can say the same thing, kiddo," agreed Knuckles.
Third Person's POV, Sunset Heights (at 5:55 am)
Dropped off by Mic, Sonic raced through the streets of the ruined and burning streets of Sunset Heights – the once happy place turned into hell. As he ran through, he looked on his left to see a…
"What the heck?!" he said to himself. "A whole army of Death Egg Robots?!"
They were attacking on the lower areas of the street. He couldn't see what was going on, but there must be a battle between those robots and the reinforcements. To the hedgehog's surprise, the robots were easily defeated and burned to the ground.
"That worked!" he said. "I'll find Shadow and be back in no time!"
He ran through the broken city while taking out other robots that blocked his path. With a tracker Tails made, he used it to find Shadow.
"Listen up!" said Amy. "Shadow has been sighted! Apparently, he's travelling above the city at high speed!"
Hearing that, the blue hedgehog looked up to see something flaming red flying across the city. That must be Shadow. Sonic continued forward, heading towards that red flame, before seeing it dropped into the city.
"The last sighting was just up ahead," explained Amy. "Be careful, Sonic."
"I'll be fine," said Sonic cockily. "What can possibly go wrong?"
Oh…EVERYTHING can go wrong there, little rat.
Running through the streets, he stopped at an area surrounded by destroyed apartments.
In front of him was Shadow…again.
Arms crossed over his chest.
"Well, goody goody," said Sonic smirking. "I wonder where you have been the whole time!"
Again, he could see glitches on Shadow's body. Something didn't look right.
"C'mon!" said Sonic, getting a bit inpatient. "You got NOTHING to say? Just tell me what you want to do! At least tell me why you join…?"
He trailed off when he blinked and Shadow disappeared.
"Not again…" groaned Sonic.
He quickly turned around, knowing that Shadow would make a surprise attack, only to feel hands grabbing his throat.
"S-Shadow?!" chocked out Sonic.
The black hedgehog made no reply as he continued to strangle Sonic to death. The latter had to think fast or it would be all over. If he didn't get an answer, he would just have defend himself.
"Just what are you DOING?!" gasped Sonic. "Do you know who you are working with? I thought you made a promise to protect humanity. I thought you made that promise with-"
"CHAOS CONTROL!"
That wasn't from his attacker though.
Everything flashed white, causing the Shadow attacking Sonic to be frozen in time. That was when ANOTHER Shadow appeared and roundhouse kicked the first Shadow away from them. Everything went back to normal.
"Another Shadow?!" said Sonic, confused and shocked.
The first Shadow laid defeated onto the cobblestone ground before glitching and disappeared from reality.
"That was a fake," said the REAL Shadow.
"A fake?!" said Sonic. So the whole time, those enemies who teamed up Eggman were FAKES?!
The blue hedgehog looked at the black hedgehog. "A-are you another fake as well?"
Shadow turned around, frowning and his arms crossed.
"No," he said bluntly. "These projections can't do Chaos Control."
Sonic tilted his head a bit.
"…and you called my 'Shads' at times. It annoys me."
Sonic sighed. "OK…but what's with these fakes? Zavok and Chaos never get along with Eggman for a while, so they are fake as well?"
"Infinite can create virtual reality projections," explained Shadow. "They have mass and form, but no heart and soul."
"Virtual realtiy?" said Sonic. Then it hit him; the Phantom Ruby. It was the cause of all of this. "So all those familiar faces that were a part of Eggman's army are…replicas?"
"Yes. The problem is, they may not be real, but their powers are nearly as formidable as the originals. According to Rouge, Infinite can create unlimited numbers of them."
"So…fight after fight, he can just keep cranking up counterfeits?"
"Exactly. As it stands, there's no way we can win this."
"Of course we can win this! We always do!" said Sonic. "We found the weakness to their power and the Resistance is going to destroy one of two generators that powers up the Phantom Ruby today. It will be a piece of cake!"
Shadow rolled his eyes. "Don't think of it as simple, faker. Still, ruby or not, Eggman already conquered most of the world and Infinite is out there for blood."
"…One question, Shads. Where were you the whole time?"
"Let me tell you something, faker."
It was one month before the doctor took over the world, the first time Shadow encountered…him.
He and Team Dark were sent on a mission by G.U.N to find out what Eggman was up to. The mad doctor built a new base somewhere in the desert and somewhat built a new weapon, so Shadow and Omega went out. Omega was able to barge in the pyramid first…but something happened to him.
When Shadow got inside the base, all he saw was Omega's hand…chopped off.
That was the only remains of him.
The black hedgehog looked up to see…Infinite.
Before he had time to react, Infinite caught Shadow in a force-like power. The latter tried to use Chaos Control, but it wasn't strong enough.
Infinite laughed. "The world's most powerful robot is no more a challenge than crabmeat. As I suspected, this power is without peer. It is the ultimate strength! Ah…and still more wonderful, a not-so-tall, dark and brooding guest has arrived. I've been waiting for YOU, Shadow."
"Tell me what you did to Omega," Shadow growled through gritted teeth.
"Weaklings like him are of no consequence. Come now, Shadow. Our long awaited reunion and still you spout such nonsense."
This got Shadow confused. Reunion? What was he talking about? Though…the body…the gloves…the boots…looked familiar…
"I don't think I know you before…" said Shadow, trying to figure out who that person was. "And the only thing of NO CONSEQUENCES around here is that BIG MOUTH OF YOURS."
Silence.
Infinite howled in laughter as his grip on the force tightened Shadow. The black creature laughed before ending it with a bitter 'HA!'
"I suppose you would think so VERY WELL. To you, it was simply another in a long list of Eggman bases you tore down without a second thought."
The next thing Shadow saw was a memory…Infinite used his powers to make him and the black hedgehog see the memory.
It was the time when Shadow broke into one of Eggman's facilities 3 months ago. He was sent on a mission by the G.U.N to prevent Eggman from attacking a town by destroying the machinery made there. He was able to break through the entrance and there was a large defense squad…of jackals.
They seemed to be hired by Eggman and when he yelled through their ear pieces to attack, all Shadow had to do was defend himself. He told them to stay out of his way, but they ignored him saying 'it was the boss' orders, not ours'.
Shadow had no choice, but to use his Chaos Control to get rid of them. When the dust cleared, they were all lying there…dead.
Two of the remaining jackals tried to attack only to be kicked to the curb; one hit a tree and one was crushed under boulders.
And then…Shadow met him.
It was Infinite without the mask OR the ruby and he challenged him to a fight. Shadow accepted it, but there…there was someone who tried to stop us.
It was a cyan bird wearing black goggles, a black long trench jacket, a camouflage shirt and boots, black ripped jeans and black finger-less gloves.
He wasn't like the rest of them.
He pleaded for both of them to stop and tried to defend Infinite. Shadow snapped and gave him a blow.
He hit the wall…not moving…dead.
Shadow managed to defeat Infinite and said:
"Worthless. Don't show your pathetic face around me ever again."
And then, Shadow went off to shut down the machinery. After the mission, he kind of felt sorry for what he did to that squad, but hey. It was their choice to join Eggman. However, a few other agents of G.U.N were a bit upset with what he did.
Especially one of his allies, Agent Johnson.
"Geez," she said that day. "Eggman Empire might be horrible, but that's just dark, Shadow."
Shadow sighed. "It was their choice to fight. None of them had the right mind to back out."
Once the memory was over, the black hedgehog was taken back to the present to see Infinite face to face.
"That day," he explained. "I gave up on my own unsightly face. And I let go of the old me; the old me that was so weak, so that I could become stronger. I used a mask to hide myself…and then…at last…I obtained the power…the Phantom Ruby…the power to make all yield to all my will. I…was…REBORN! I've only become what I am because of you, yet you don't remember. But I suppose that's the way it goes. It simply means that the old me was too weak…too pathetic to remember. And now, YOU'VE become nothing more than an insect, waiting to be crushed underfoot."
Shadow was silent for a while. To think that killing the defense squad would help him succeed his mission, but to do that and let a remaining member survive knowing that his gang is already dead…
His 'meaningless' kills just sparked something up.
"OK…yeah," said Shadow, his face all gritty. "I will admit that what I did wasn't right, but they were working for Eggman. And it wasn't my fault who made you who you are; it was YOU. You let yourself get a hold of that gem! Isn't that what your teammates want?"
Infinite snarled bitterly. "Why would I need those people anyone? Friends are nothing, but a fleeting illusion. You can count on nobody, but yourself! With the Phantom Ruby, this power is mine. The world is mine. The strength is mine. Thanks to this limitless power I've obtained, I have become unstoppable! TAKE THIS!"
And that was when Shadow was thrown into an illusionary world. Everything was glitching and red pixel blocks were flying everywhere. The last thing he heard from Infinite was this:
"Worthless. Don't show your pathetic face around me ever again."
Shadow tried to contact the G.U.N or Rouge for help, but the connections were damaged. He wasn't safe in the illusionary world. He was attacked by anything that he came upon or he would go through something more horrible than ever. He was even force to witness the events of his time at Space ARK…including Maria's death.
He still didn't give up.
He didn't know how long he spent trying to escape the illusions, but he managed to get himself back into the real world.
Back in Central City where the G.U.N HQ was DESTROYED.
Apparently, he was gone for six months during his time in the illusionary world. He made his way to the bunkers to find that everyone feared him. It was all because of Infinite. He made a fake Shadow and used it to kill many people. The real Shadow was ready to leave when he bumped into someone he knew.
Agent Johnson.
She was annoyed at him for 'being on a vacation for 6 months' and responsible for starting the war since he killed the Jackal Squad.
"If you just look before you leap," she said. "Then you wouldn't have gotten all of us in the first place. If you just knock the jackals out instead of KILLING them, then Infinite wouldn't go on his psychopath career."
"Look," said Shadow. "I'm sorry. But think about it; at least Infinite's on his own. If the whole squad survived, then there would be at least 10 Infinites."
Johnson rolled her eyes. "Oh really? If so, then why did they try to persuade him to not join Eggman the whole time?"
Shadow was dumbfounded. "W-What do you mean? I'm sure that they agreed with him. Why are you telling this to me?"
"Ask HIM."
There was also another agent, but…that one was the other jackal he spared.
The one who was kicked to the tree.
He was frightened of Shadow and even tried to escape. However, he bumped into a dead end and trembled in fear.
Shadow only saw a broken and troubled man.
The black hedgehog apologized to him and the jackal was willing to give him a second chance, even though he was still afraid.
"J-Just please…" said that jackal. "Please don't repeat what you did. I don't want another killer monster to arise in the world."
He and Johnson explained to Shadow what happened the war and promised to contact Rouge about the situation, so he went off to find the Resistance HQ.
And that was how he spotted Sonic at Sunset Heights.
"I was hoping that you and the Resistance would still be alive. I was worried that I was too late…"
Shadow trailed off, finishing his last sentence.
"OK…but I didn't manage to catch up when you said 'you encountered Infinite'," said Sonic.
Shadow looked at the blue hedgehog and slightly growled in annoyance while face palming. "That was LITERALLY the first thing I said to you."
"Just kidding," said Sonic snickering. "So…I thought Infinite was a monster Eggman made."
"PARTLY, faker."
There was a glimmer in Shadow's eyes.
"I messed up," muttered Shadow.
"Huh?" said Sonic.
"I messed up again."
Sonic shrugged. "I don't think it was your fault to let Infinite get away with all of this."
"It was kind of my fault…I got that jackal to the edge. I killed his squad and I thought it was the right thing to do…but never mind. That was in the past and at least I get to make amends with one of the members."
There was a tense silence between the two hedgehogs.
"Wait…" said Sonic. "You…you said that one of the members of the squad was a…bird, right?"
"Yeah…" said Shadow, raising an eye.
"What's…the color of his feathers again?"
Shadow shrugged. "Somewhat bright blue."
"Cyan?"
"Possibly."
"And does he wear black goggles and…black gloves?"
Shadow nodded.
"Does he…have a scar over his face?"
Shadow shrugged. "Not at that time. He had a bandage over the right eye."
Sonic gulped.
Mecha.
He had cyan features and black goggles.
Including that scar.
"Could it be?" thought Sonic. "Is Mecha…a part of Infinite's squad? And is he…working for Eggman? That can't be possible. Shadow said he killed him…but…what if he survived? And…but Mecha isn't above evil. I don't believe it. There's a lot of questions I need to ask to the Black Squad."
The more he thought about it, the more it worried Sonic. Hell, even Mecha's attitude was showing a lot. The blue hedgehog's face turned pale as he started to think about what might happen for the Resistance if Mecha actually works for Eggman.
"What's the point?" said Shadow.
"Sorry," said Sonic quickly. "It's nothing."
There was a faint explosion a few kilometres away from them.
"Let's just head back to the Resistance HQ," said Shadow. "We have to go now."
Sonic nodded and the two hedgehogs raced out of the city.
?, 5 years ago
"Brother!"
"Big brother!"
"Ugh…what is it? How much you need?"
"We aren't asking for money for the 100th time."
"We just want to play with you, big brother! We got a dance party going along!"
"No way. Just leave me along here."
"He's got to come with us!"
"Yeah. Willow haven't played with you for a long time already."
"SERIOUSLY! Willow, I'm not gonna come to your dance party now and play with your dolls. I'm in the middle of creating a water weapon that will be destructive and effective…things that you don't understand."
"You are overworking again, brother. Why don't you just take a break and play with us? You know…like a family."
"Family…that is messed up. I'm too busy. Go ask your younger brother or our older siblings."
"But little brother is away for flute tutoring, big brother! And elder brother and elder sister are away on their work trip."
"Just please BUG OFF."
PULL!
"HEY! Don't pull me out of my room, Willow!"
"Please! I just want to play with you!"
"Go screw off and do something else!"
"Hey! Brother. Watch you language! Willow just wants to play. She misses you."
"I don't care. I'm too busy to play. You can all suck on my nose for all I care."
"FOR GOD'S SAKE! Brother, don't put up with this attitude. You have been staying in that room for so long and you barely talked to us anymore. Ever since you turned 10, you seem to lose your manners. Can you at least for ONCE respect us and listen to us FOR ONCE I SAID?!"
"F-F-For once? Respect? RESPECT?! YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU RESPECT?! YOU WANT ME TO SHOW YOU HOW I FEEL?!"
SHOVE!
"Eep!"
CRASH!
THUMP!
BOOM!
"…a…a…ah…"
"…"
"Big sister!"
"…w…w…what did I…?"
"…"
"Big sister? Are you OK? Ah! There's a black spot on the right side of you face."
"It's just a bruise. Leave me alone, Willow."
"S-sister…I…"
"W…why did you do this, brother? I thought I could make you feel better..."
"…"
SLAM!
"Big sister? Big sister! BIG SISTER! Big brother, why did you push her off the stairs?"
"…"
AN: Suspenseful, isn't it? We uncover a few more secrets here and there!
I know that in some Sonic stories, some people don't want the Jackal Squad to be killed. Unfortunately, this is what I'm doing. Shadow is one of the most powerful heroes in the Sonic series and I bet that he isn't afraid to take someone's life. But he fits in the 'Anti-Hero' trope, so I made him have second thoughts about his actions and even have him thinking if the war was his fault as a consequence for killing Infinite's squad. In my version of the Sonic series, Shadow is more well-mannered, calmer and slightly empathetic. If you're wondering why, then...this is due to...the role Agent Johnson plays in the Forces United AU, but that's just another story...
I wasn't planning to have Clay's Cyan Wisp to have a traumatic backstory, but seeing her carefree nature, I believe that there is always something behind the mask of a person. That's why I place some angst on Cyan. Her vision of Clay is inspired by the Australian 2016 film 'Lion'. It's a great movie; you should check it out.
If you enjoy this chapter, be sure to follow or favorite this story, so you can get updates about this story. Make sure to review this chapter on what you think about this chapter. I'm OK of hearing improvements from you (please no flames).
Until next time, keep on rocking!
