Prompt: Underfell - Angsty fluff
Warnings: very vaguely implied self-harm
"I don't think I can do this anymore," he says, falling down on their couch as though literally collapsing under the weight of the world, ignoring the sound of coins lost eons ago beneath the cushions.
Sans can't do much more than frown at him. He's wet, tired, and cold. Not the ideal state to deal with his brother's existential crisis, as one would say.
Papyrus runs one hand down his face, and there is no scowl anymore. His fingers trace down his ruined eye socket with an almost nauseated look on his face, hunched in on himself as if he wishes the ground could just swallow him whole.
He looks small. Worried. Vulnerable.
It makes Sans sick. Any bare display of fragility like a red flag screaming "kill me, I'm free EXP!" and they haven't come this far for Papyrus to pussy out on him now.
"Stop that." He grabs the other's wrist and pulls down. His brother startles, but then raises his head and bares his sharp fangs at him.
"Why?" Bitterness is seeping through every word. "Not like it matters anyway." He's trying to pull free, but Sans doesn't let go.
Doesn't want to watch as his younger brother picks at the edges of his socket again, breaking off little pieces of bone that flutter into dust.
Papyrus doesn't deal well with their situation. He doesn't like hurting people. He doesn't like killing people. He doesn't like hating people.
So he hates himself instead.
And Sans doesn't know what to do about it. Knows that every day in this world is breaking his brother a bit more on the inside, and he's not sure if they'll ever be able to put him back together again.
"Stop being a baby-" he hisses, venom in his voice.
Papyrus frowns at him, face caught somewhere between anger and desperation. His eyes are burning red and his entire frame is shaking now.
"Can't we just go? Please, Sans, we don't need all this. We can just leave." His hand gestures at the room around them. The warmth. The food. The security.
Papyrus would leave this all behind? Return to the streets, fighting for survival, just because he can't handle himself?
Sans snarls and his grip tightens. "What the fuck are you going on about now? You know damn well why things are the way they are. Or do you want to get us both killed?"
His brother flinches, face turning away quickly. The guilt is almost instantaneous, and Sans lets go - startled by his own vexation.
Neither says anything and for a moment, it's like Sans can physically feel the gap between them.
Since when did that get there?
He opens his mouth but no sound leaves and all he can think is that he's right.
Papyrus is terrible at being terrible, and they will both wind up dead soon.
"I'm sorry," he mutters instead, knowing full well it won't fix anything. "I'm sorry. We'll be okay."
Papyrus looks at him and nods, but he can tell his brother doesn't believe him.
Sans doesn't even believe himself.
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Tumblr: sharada-n
