WHAT IF

Chapter 8 - Confusion

The weeks after the Quidditch party were filled with learning, learning and -oh! - learning for Hermione. She was buried in parchment and books and had occupied one table in the common room as her own private study place. And no one - no one! - was allowed to move her study materials.

Hermione slowly felt like she was going crazy, but still, she was a bit thankful for the intense study period. It helped her to ignore the confusing feeling in her chest whenever she saw Fred and Angelina together in the common room or the Great Hall. And she saw them quite often. Maybe it was because she was now more aware of them or maybe the two friends actually spent more time together. Hermione wasn't sure and she tried hard not to think about it too much. It just distracted her from her school works.

When the last day of the finals was over Hermione almost felt like a whole mountain was lifted off her shoulders. All the learning and reading and writing were finally over for the school year. She couldn't wait for the holidays! She needed some time at home with her parents without all this stress. And she needed to think about her classes. Four more years till graduation… did she really want to do this every year?

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The day Buckbeak's execution was planned for the last day of their finals. Hermione, Harry and Ron went down to Hagrid's hut with the intention to help their big friends through this hard time. They wanted to be there for him because honestly no one really believed anymore that the hippogriff would get off the sentence. They all expected an execution.

What they hadn't expected was to find Scabbers in one of Hagrid's milk jugs and a big black dog kidnapping Ron into the Shrieking Shack. Hermione also didn't expect her cat to be friends with said dog, who was no other than Sirius Black himself, Animagus and convicted murderer.

Hermione was astonished by the intelligence of Crookshanks while Sirius Black explained how he had befriended her half-kneazle - who had seen through Scabbers façade immediately - and stole the passwords from Neville for Black. Hermione almost passed out when she realised that Ron had been right. Her cat had targeted Scabbers specifically… But she would be damned to admit that ever. The git still owed her an apology for behaving like she was the enemy.

What Hermione also hadn't expected was to be confronted with hundreds of Dementors at the lake later that night, when Professor Lupin was off running in the woods and Professor Snape was knocked out. The only grown-ups able to help them chase away the dark creatures!

Hermione sat beside Harry on the ground while he tried to summon his Patronus, but he wasn't successful. She even tried it herself, but with no luck. No matter how hard she studied or how smart she was, magic like this couldn't be learned with smarts alone. It had to come from the heart, Hermione realised, as she tried it again and again and again. But the feeling of angst and cold and sadness made her body heavy and her heart empty. No happy thought was left in her and as she slowly drifted off she didn't remember the eyes of the Basilisk in her small hand-mirror. Instead, the cold treatment of Harry and Ron was the worst memory the Dementors left her with.

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When Hermione woke up at the hospital wing later she had no idea how much time had passed. It was still dark outside, so it couldn't be that long. Her first instinct was to jump up and demand to know what happened. But her body was still tired.

Slowly Hermione sat up and looked around. Ron was asleep on the right side of her in a hospital bed, his leg in a hard plaster and an empty bottle of sleeping potion in the bedside. Harry on her left side was also asleep.

Suddenly harsh whispers came from the slightly open door and Hermione identified one as Professor Snape immediately. Quietly she turned to face Harry and pretended to be asleep again.

"What amazes me most it the behaviour of the Dementors… you've really no idea what made them retreat, Snape?"

"No, Minister. By the time I had come around they were heading back to their position at the entrances." Hermione almost betrayed her sleeping façade. The minister was here!

"Extraordinary. And yet Back, and Harry, and the girl -"

"All unconscious by the time I reached them. I bound and gagged Black, naturally, conjured stretchers and brought them all straight back to the castle." Slowly the words sunk in and Hermione understood what this meant. They would still give the kiss to Sirius. They didn't know the story. No one would believe Sirius Black and three children…

In this second Harry opened his eyes but his facial expression told Hermione that he too had listened. Instantly Harry tried to start a discussion with Snape and Fudge about Sirius, but no one wanted to listen to them. Hermione sat beside him, tried to get a word in, but nothing seemed to sway their way.

"I think that's enough." Professor Dumbledore walked in, a good-smiled on his face. In his usual friendly way, he ushered the Minister and Professor Snape out of the room.

"Well, what we need is more time." The headmaster smiled at Hermione.

"Oh!"

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After their successful rescue mission, Hermione and Harry spent a wonderful night at the hospital wing. Ron was out cold thanks to the sleeping potion, but Hermione and Harry had a lot of fun with eating chocolate and silently congratulating each other for a job well done. In hushed whispers, Hermione told Harry about her year with the Time Turner. How she had jumped back in time several times a day.

The next day, when Ron's leg was fully healed and Hermione and Harry were sick of chocolate, all three of them were released from the hospital wing. It was also the last Hogsmeade weekend of the school year, but the three friends decided to rather take a walk around the Black lake then smuggling Harry to Hogsmeade again. Even Harry and Ron agreed that it was far too risky to go since Professor Snape was still angry about Sirius' escape. Snape would probably love to catch Harry doing something illegal just to get some kind of revenge.

It was during their walk that they heard about the resign of Professor Lupin when they met Hagrid. Harry, of course, ran off as fast as possible to speak with his father's old friend, which left Hermione alone with Ron. They hadn't been alone since the day Harry had discovered the truth about Sirius Black in The Three Broomsticks before Christmas and Ron and Hermione had talked about how they didn't want him to do something stupid or dangerous. A month of fighting laid in between that and Hermione kind of was lost. For the first time, she didn't know how to behave around her best friend.

On one hand, she wanted to talk with him about the fight, about her hurt feelings, and about his behaviour. Hermione was ready to admit that she was also at fault, but Ron's harsh words and his rude behaviour needed to be addressed. On the other hand, she was glad that everything was kind of back to normal and she didn't want to endanger their peace.

"Want to go back to the castle? I think dinner will be ready soon." Ron pulled Hermione out of her thoughts. Silently they made their way back to the Great Hall. Dinner was served the moment they arrived and Ron eagerly filled his plate.

Well, seems like we will just ignore the awkwardness, Hermione thought. She sat beside Ginny, who was talking with Colin Creevey about how they couldn't wait for their first Hogsmeade trip next year. A few minutes later Harry arrived.

"Snape rated Lupin out. Told the Slytherins about him being a werewolf. Lupin resigned before the angry parents of them could get the chance to send letters to Dumbledore." Harry explained with a whisper. Their discussion was interrupted when the students from Hogsmeade came back and arrived loudly at the Great Hall. In minutes the Gryffindor table was filled with excited students.

"Wotcher!" Fred and George sat down next to Harry, while Angelina and Alicia sat down beside Hermione. The four fifth years were soon deep into a discussion about who was likely to become the new Gryffindor Quidditch Captain next year. A discussion Harry and Ron eagerly joined, while Hermione only half-listened.

"Oh, come on, Ange, everyone knows it will be you." Fred smiled at Angelina. An honest smile without any teasing or joking in his voice. George and Alicia nodded.

"No one is better at commanding George and me around. And I can think of no one else I would want to command me around." Now Fred winked and Hermione watched how the tall girl beside her blushed. Not even Angelina's dark skin could save her from showing her embarrassment. Hermione's heart clenched a bit but she pushed the feeling aside. Something was wrong with her since the Quidditch final.

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On the train ride back to London Hermione, Ron and Harry had had the chance to get a compartment alone for the three of them. They still had a lot to talk about. Sirius Black, Professor Lupin, Buckbeak and the next school year in general. Ron invited the two of them to the Burrow over the summer for the Quidditch World Cup. Even Hermione, who wasn't a big fan of the sport, was eager to go and witness this part of the magical culture. She would be able to meet witches and wizards from around the world!

Hermione also told her friend that she had decided to give the Time Turner back. She explained that he had dropped Muggle Studies and now had a normal schedule again.

"I can't believe you didn't tell. We're supposed to be your friends." Ron sulked. The news that Hermione had had a Time Turner for almost a year had hit him pretty badly. But Hermione failed to feel sorry for that. She bit back a comment about them not behaving like friends for a big part of the year.

She also tried to be not too overjoyed with the news that Sirius indeed had been the one to send Harry the Firebolt when the letter from Harry's godfather arrived with a small, over-motivated owl. When they finally arrived in London Hermione was glad to be home with her parents for the first time since her first year. She had a lot to think about, especially her friendship with Ron and Harry.

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Hermione spent the first two weeks of her summer with her parents on the French Rivera. It were two wonderful weeks filled days laying at the beach, enjoying the sun, eating ice cream, evening discovering the small shops and local restaurants, and shopping souvenirs. It were two weeks where Hermione for once completely forgot about Hogwarts, magic, and the painful times during her third year.

But once the Grangers all arrived back in London and her parents had to work again Hermione was left alone with her thoughts. She tried to keep herself busy with reading, strolling through bookshops, and sunbathing in her garden. Once in a while, she would send a care package with food and sweets to Harry, who was apparently being starved by his terrible relatives because his cousin had to lose weight.

"Hermione Granger! Is that really you?" Hermione slowly opened her eyes. She laid on a sun chair in her parents' garden and was just about to fall asleep. In the neighbouring garden stood Patricia Summers, her childhood frenemy. Hermione and Patricia had been friends in kindergarten before Patricia realised that Hermione wasn't quite like other children and deemed her boring. Sometime during primary school, Patricia's parents had divorced and Patricia had moved away with her mother. Her father still lived with his new girlfriend in the house next to the Grangers.

"Hey Patricia, how are you?"

"Not good, my soon-to-be-stepmonster is harassing me. She wants me to spend more time outside the house." Patricia rolled her eyes. She was just like Hermione remembered her. Tall and lanky with straight black hair and an arrogant smile. Even as a small child Patricia had had the ability to seem superior to everyone.

"Well, the weather is quite nice." Hermione waved at the bright, blue sky and then reached for her book. Thankfully it was a Muggle novel and not one of her books from Hogwarts.

"Too right," Patricia grinned and then jumped over the small fence. "Can I have some?" She gestured at Hermione's glass, filled with cooled butterbeer, and emptied the glass without waiting for an answer.

"Wow, that's good stuff. Where do I get that?"

"France and that was the rest of my last bottle." Hermione glared at her old friend. She wanted to get rid of Patricia Summers and soon as possible but she was too polite to just say it outright.

"Too bad," the other girl shrugged: "So, I met Daniel Winston last week when I went to Marcy's birthday party. You remember Marcy, she went to primary school with us, and we kept contact after I moved." Without taking the time to even breathe Patricia proceeded to tell Hermione all the new gossip about their old classmates. Who was dating who and who was now hot and who not. Hermione assumed that Patricia was actually really bored and had nothing better to do since Hermione was normally on the not-hot-list and therefore not interesting to Patricia.

"So, Hermione, what's new with you?" A glint in the other girl's eyes showed Hermione that everything she said now would be the latest gossip. No matter how uninteresting Hermione was as a person to most of her former classmates.

"Not much. I'm at a boarding school for most the year." Hermione answered. Even if she wanted to, she couldn't tell Patricia about Hogwarts.

"Oh yeah, the super prestigious boarding school for specially gifted children. I heard about that." Patricia's voice was filled with annoyance. "You know, it's not a surprise, really. You were always so… smart and always had your nose in a book. Are all the students of your school like that? Sounds terribly boring."

"No, not at all." Hermione smiled involuntarily as she remembered the fun she had had in the last years and all her adventures.

"Hu? What was that?" Patricia frowned.

"What?"

"That smile! Out with juicy details."

"Well, it's just that some of the… gifted students at my school may be smart, but that doesn't mean that they are well-behaved and studious." Hermione grinned and winked at Patricia. Now she actually had some fun with riling her up.

"Hm, so you say," Patricia slowly let her eyes wander over Hermione's body like she was seeing her - really seeing her - for the first time. "You know, you're kind of different from before. You're still a bookworm and that hair, God, you should do something about it, and how someone with Dentists as parents can have such teeth is beyond me, but you're different. More confident?"

"I try to take that as a compliment," Hermione answered coolly.

"Oh, there is this really, really hot guy at my new school. I tell you, you will never find someone more handsome than him." A deep sigh escaped Patricia as she changed the subject without any warning. "Any good-looking boys at your school? I mean, smart and hot is the goal, isn't it?"

The question caught Hermione off guard and for a split-second, the image of Fred Weasley flitted through her mind. Well, it made sense. All the girls she knew said that the twins were handsome.

But you only thought of Fred, not Fred-and-George, a small voice giggled deep inside of her. With as much force as possible Hermione pushed that thought aside and smiled at Patricia.

"Yeah, I suppose there are some. Now, if you excuse me." Hermione gestured at her book and finally managed to get rid of the girl. For the rest of the holidays, she didn't see Patricia again and she was quite glad about it.

A short one because I'm terribly busy this week.

Thank you all for reviewing! If you want to: I'm open to suggestions about chapter titles. I spent too much time trying to find the perfect one and its pure stress for me. Takes forever. So, I thought to ask you and maybe I will find something matching. Or maybe it inspires me with new ideas for the next chapters ;) stupid idea?