Will and his parents greet Jay at home when he returns from Afghanistan after he and his brothers-in-arms are defeated by a horrible experience

This one hurts my heart so here we go.

It was the absence of the hum that woke him up. Jay had been on an airplane for the past nine hours. Around hour six he found that his eyes were falling closed. He allowed for the mix of stress and pain over the last three days to finally consume him, his exhaustion taking over and forcing his aching body to rest. He felt the injuries in his chest jostle as the plane touched down in Chicago, the flight from Germany was long and painful. He wasn't able to move, sitting in the barely cushioned seat of the military aircraft. He gasped as he felt the stitches in his chest pull against his skin. Biting his lip, he suppressed a scream. It was when mouse shook his shoulder that he finally remembered that this was the last flight they needed to take. At last, he was home.

"You good man?" Mouse asks, standing carefully and stretching his sore muscles. Jay grunts as he stands but swats away Mouse's hand when he offers to help him.

Mouse out of all the rangers on the Humvee was the least injured. He knew that Jay also didn't take as much of the impact of the blast, but still, seeing his best friend unconscious like that, his hair blowing like the sand around them. In that moment Mouse couldn't hear anything, the IED momentarily rendering his ears unusable. He still saw Jay, laying there, his chest covered in blood, glass and shrapnel, looking so helpless. He looked down at his mangled arm and sighed before rushing to pull Jay away from the blast. Most of the occupants of the vehicle survived, however, sticks(the guy with the skull tattoo on his forearm) was quite literally blown up. Pieces of his body were scattered around, some of them unidentifiable. When Jay came to, maybe a minute later he asked where everyone was, if everyone was okay. Mouse would never forget the look on Jays face when he had to tell him what had happened to their fallen team member.

"I'm fine!" Jay snaps, tired of everyone worrying about him, though he knew that once him mom and Will had their turns he'd be going crazy. "Let's just get out of here." He said, his voice mellowing out when he noticed the nervous look on Jays face.

They only made it a couple of steps before the flight attendants closer The the front of the aircraft noticed them and thanked them for their service. The two of them nodded and smiled. Their Sargent had always taught them to do that, people wanted to think it was all 'rainbows and butterflies' over there and ruining civilians ideas about what was really going on didn't help anybody. Getting out of the plane took a little while longer then either of the men expected but nevertheless they finally made it out.

"Mommy look soldiers!" A little girl yells from her seated position at her gate. "Just like daddy!" She exclaims. That one pulled at Jays heart strings. He saw the girl run up to him briefly before feeling her little hands around his legs, hugging him tightly. Her mother, turning red had to practically pry her daughter off of Jay.

"I'm so sorry." She apologized, taking in both of the men in front of her. "My husband died a couple months ago, she's still... well she doesn't quite get it yet."

"We understand ma'am." Mouse says, smiling down at the little girl before crouching down to her level. "Just remember that he did it for you. We all did it for you." He says, watching as the youngster's mother's eyes fill with tears.

"Thank you both... for your service." Mouse and Jay nodded, each giving a half hearted smile to the mother before continuing on their way towards the exit, where their families should be waiting.

"Man that sucks." Mouse says, seeing Kay nod from the corner of his eye. "You sure you're okay?" He asks one more time.

"Just want to go home Mouse that's all." Jay responds, his lack of emotion worrying Mouse. They walked in silence the rest of the way. Mouse didn't even need to scan the area before he felt his two sisters crash into him. Their parents gone it was just the three of them, well and his oldest sister's new fiancé, who he wasn't sure he liked quite yet. They both peppered their baby brother's face with kisses, telling him how much they loved him over and over. Jay scanned the crowd of people, all waiting for a loved one to return from somewhere. He didn't see anyone he knew so he just allowed himself to smile at the love Mouse was receiving.

"I'm not doing that!" He hears Will say from behind him. He turns quickly to embrace his big brother, a little too quickly. Once again he feels the stitches in his chest pulling. Jay ignores the pain and allows himself to just feel Will, hugging him tight. "It's good to see ya!" He announces, smiling down at Jay. The second their hug is over his mother finds her way towards him and practically jumps into his arms. He lifts her from the ground, wincing when the pain strikes him.

"Hi baby." She sighed, just holding him. To be totally honest she wanted another one. With her boys all grown up the house felt empty. She even tried to convince Pat but he logically told her that starting over would be crazy now and they should just wait a couple more years for grandchildren. She agreed. Plus the whole pregnancy thing, she did not want to do that again, ever. Ellie runs her hands through Jays hair, she looks at him and sighed again. "You look skinny!" She says, making both him and Will laugh. "Let go home, there's dinner waiting for you." She tells him, placing her hand on his shoulder and leading him towards the car.

"Welcome home kid." Pat says, smiling as Jay hugs him from the back of their car. The drive was filled with childish banter between Will and Jay and giggles from both their parents.

"Man I missed this place." Jay mentions as they pull up to the green rimmed house that he was all to familiar with. He got out of the car quickly, allowing his father to take the green army coloured bag out of his hands so that he could hop up the steps. "Home sweet home!" Jay announced, inhaling the smell of the house deeply.

"Go was up for dinner I'll set the table." Ellie says, looking at all the men in the room. "Seriously I don't know where your hands have been... and I don't want to... just go wash them!" She jokes. As they go up the stairs she hears Pat mumble that she knows where his hands have been, then some fake gagging from both her boys. She laughs, cherishing the full house again.

The three of them come clamouring down the steps. They sit down next to the food cover table and join hands. Ellie smiles.

"Dear Heavenly Father, I would first like to thank you for this food in front of us. Thank you for bringing Jay home safe and please continue to do so." Ellie says after they all close their eyes and bow their heads. "Amen"

"Amen" The boys say nearly in unison. They dig in and eat the food like they jade you eaten in days. For Jay that was almost true. He didn't quite realize how hungry he was until their was food in front of him and he didn't have to think about the past couple of days, only eating. Maybe it was that he ate too fast or the fact that he hadn't eaten in nearly two days, but as soon as the food went down, it came right back up. Jay could feel the good rising in his throat, he stood up and sprinted to the only bathroom downstairs. His mother quickly follows, going straight to Jay's side and rubbing gentle circles on his back.

"You done?" She asks when the vomiting stops for a second and Jay takes the moment to catch his breath. A second later he throws up again. "Guess not." She says, continuing to rub Jays back in an effort to calm his stomach. "I'll get you some grape juice." She says, leaving to the kitchen to grab it. She had done this each time her boys had a stomachache, whether it was scientifically proven to work or not, it had always made them feel better. She returns to the bathroom and flushed the vomit filled toilet, handing him the glass as she does. Jay starts to chug before he feels the glass tilt away from him. "If you do that you'll just throw it back up. Drink slowly baby." Jay listens and proceeds to sip on the juice. Ellie leads him back towards his room, it's just like he left it. She opens up the blanket for him and pats the bed. Without thinking Jay strips down to his boxers, pausing when he saw the look of horror on his mother's face.

"It's nothing really... just a scratch." He says trying to ease her worry. He pulls her into a hug, not caring that he wasn't properly clothed. "I'm okay mom I swear." Jay says when he feels her body shake with a sob. Jay hears a knock on the door, before his fathers head pops in. "Help me out here!" Jay says, the panic evident in his voice. Pat wraps his arms around his wife and lets her now cry into his chest.

"Geez kid." Pat gasps, finally seeing the scars and stitches that littered his youngest's chest. "Ellie calm down this isn't helping" pat tells her, rubbing the top of her head. Her cries stop for a minute, she takes Jay's hand and pulls him to sit on the bed. Ellie crouches down in front of her son, pulling his head to her chest, pushing his hair back and then kissing his forehead.

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to freak you out." She confesses, rocking Jay's head and shoulders back and forth in a sway. "It's just... I can't stand to see my babies hurt okay? and... and... ugh!"

"It's okay... but I'm okay really." Jay assures her one more time, taking his arms and wrapping them over her waist. "Umm... mom?" He asks, using his eyes to ask his father to leave. He obliged. "The doctor in Germany gave me some meds and notes and stuff for home care when I came back." He starts, using his thumb to wipe the tears from his mother's cheeks. "But I don't know what it means... can you um..." Jay hands her the three sheets of paper that were given to him by the doctor, she carefully reads over every word. Her nearly thirty five years as a nurse made it easy to understand everything that was written on the sheets. She read over the long list of injuries as well as what the doctor had prescribed to her son.

"Lay down." She tells him, pulling a jar of antibiotic cream from Jay's bag. "This might sting but I have to do it." She explains,Jay looks up at the ceiling as she carefully puts the ointment on his cuts and scrapes. "You don't have to but... do you want to tell me what happened?" Ellie asks, pulling her hand away when she hears her son's whimper.

"Umm... I don't want to." He says, hating the broken look that his mother gives him.

"Alright." She says, wanting so desperately for Jay to let her in but also not wanting to stress him out more by pushing him too far. "But if you ever want to talk about it... you know you can tell me anything and it won't change how I look at you or how much I love you." She tells him, done with the cream she closes the container and rinses off her hands.

"I know mom. I know." Jay says, placing one more kiss on her head when she returns to his bed. "Thank you, for all of this."

"You rest, go to sleep, I need to wake you up in a couple of hours for an antibiotic shot okay?" Jay frowns at this news. Ellie knew that her son had never been the biggest needle fan. As a kid they would have to hold Jay down so that the doctor could inject him with whatever shot he was getting that time. Now though, Jay just avoided the sharp things at all costs, only allowing them entrance to his skin if he was unconscious. "I know baby..." she says brushing his short hair out of his face, "but it's something you need and I will hold you down if I need to!" She explains, her mouth curving into a smile showing that she was indeed just kidding. "Just go to sleep." It's the last thing she says before turning out the light and closing his door.

Ellie heads downstairs to clean up only to find her kitchen spotless. Will and Pat are lounging on the sofa, watching the baseball game when she enters the room, curling up in between both of them.

"Thank you." She says, both of them nod, Pat kisses her head, noticing how tired she is when her blue eyes droop down. Pat stokes her hair gently until she falls asleep, peacefully resting on his side.

It's nearly an hour later and the whe family is asleep, only one in their bed. A scream wakes up the three on the couch and they all clamour to get up. The race to get to Jay is quite literally a race. This time Will wins, opening the door with a slam and rushing to his brother's side.

"No... no... no" Jay stammers, his eyes farting underneath their lids.

"Baby it's okay... you need to wake up." Ellie says, keeping her distance as Jay thrashes on his bed. Will approaches this time, placing his hand ever so gently on his brother's shoulder, wanting to shake him awake. Jays eyes snap open but he can't recognize anyone. His fist collides with Will's jaw and Will plummets to the hardwood floor with a thump. "WILL!" Ellie screams as his eyes roll back into his head. It's his mother's scream that finally brings Jay out of his nightmare. Horror consumes his face as he sees his parents tending to an unconscious Will, blood pouring out of his nose.

"Jay?" Pat asks, putting his hands up in surrender like he was scared of his own son. "You with us?" He says, watching Jays eyes fill with tears, realizing what he had done. It was only a couple of seconds later that Will regained consciousness, his eyes fluttering open before he moaned and sat up against the wall. "He okay?" Pat asks, seeing Ellie tend to the blood trickling out of her son's face.

"I'm sorry." Jay all bout whispers, his face falling as tears fall freely from his eyes.

"It's okay... I'm okay." Will assures, taking the rag held by his mother and putting it in his own hand. "Come here." Will says, pulling a tear soaked Jay to his chest. Jay was in a complete panic, his breathing much to fast.

"Baby let's calm it down... slow your breathing down, everything is okay." Ellie says, putting a hand on either son's back and rubbing. They both needed her comfort at this moment.

"I can't." He just about broke down completely, his hand left Will's torso to clutch his chest and then paw at his throat. "Just leave." He demands, putting some extra strength into his voice.

"Baby we won't do that... no one is going anywhere." She says.

"I could've really hurt him... or you. Just don't touch me when I'm asleep okay... nothing good will happen." Jay explains, his face still buried in Will's shoulder. "Please just get out... you'll get hurt."

"You two..." Ellie makes eye contact with both Will and Pat. "Out!" She demands, just about pushing them completely out of the room. Will closes the door behind him, letting out a sigh before he went to deal with the ongoing nosebleed. "Okay... it's just you and me."

"Mom please..." he pleads, to no avail.

"I didn't want to push, I wanted you to have your space but now... you're going to tell me what happened, don't your dare say no or I swear to god tha..."

"Okay.. okay, I'll tell you." He says, finally allowing himself to smile at the exasperated look that was displayed on his mother's face. "It was an IED that exploded, my unit was right on top of it... um... it was my idea to go that way... I thought it would be safer." He lets himself cry now. "Turns out I just killed one of my guys... he had... a baby on the way... I... it should have been me." He concludes, watching Ellie's heart break in front of him.

"You know... one day you're going to have a beautiful little baby too... and when you do you'll thank god that he let you stay here with me... with us. I don't know what I would do if you died, probably go insane, so don't you do that, don't you feel bad for living, because I need you to live."

"I love you." Jay says, letting his mother gently wipe the tears for his face.

"I love you too." She concludes smiling before she grabs both side of Jays face and kisses his forehead. A beep sounds from Ellie's watch and she sighs, hating that she needed to do this to her baby at all. "Can you pull you boxers down a bit?" Ellie asks, searching Jays bag for the antibiotic shot she needed to give him at that time.

"What?" He's surprised, that was definitely the last thing he was expecting her to say.

"The antibiotic... baby I have to." She says, finally finding what she was looking for and pulling out the syringe, needles and medicine.

"No... I don't want to!" He says, fear in his eyes once again. "I just... everything hurts, please I don't want anything else to hurt." He justifies and Ellie nearly bursts into tears.

"You want Will to do it so I can hold you?" She questions, hoping that Jay doesn't fight this and make his injuries any worse.

"No I don't want to do it mom." He practically cries. Ellie hasn't seen him do this since he was a little boy, she hates it but it has to be done. She draw a the fluid up into the syringe and put a new, bigger needle on it. Jay whimpers at the sight. "Why can't you do the smaller one?" He asks, he's stalling.

"Because it has to go in your muscle and it needs to go through the fat." He lets one tear fall and his mother grabs him, holding him tight. He lets himself be hugged for a minute until his mother lets him go and leaves the room. Jays sighed with relief thinking he won this battle. Well, that was until Ellie came back into his room, Will and Pat in tow.

"No." Jay says, his panic making itself known again. Pat grabs Jay's sting shoulders while Will pins Jay legs down with his own. He grabs the needle and alcohol swab his mother laid out and went to pull Jays boxers down just a little bit, just enough to give him the shot. "Please no!" Jay practically begs, looking through tear stained eyes at his mother.

"Just stay still baby it'll be over before you know it." Ellie tells him, grabbing his hands and letting him squeeze them as hard as he wanted to.

"You want me to count down or just do it?" Will says, hating to see his always brave brother so fragile.

"Will don't make him more nervous just do it already." Pat whisper yells. Jay feels the alcohol wipe on his hip. He whimpers loudly as the needle is all but plunged into the sensitive area. Jay squeezes his mother's hand tightly, feeling the guilt practically consuming her. He squeaks when the large needle is removed then sighed with relief. "That's it kid... you're all done." Pat says, tapping Jays shoulders as he stood up. Him and Will left the room. Jay pulled his boxers back over himself.

"It's going to get better baby... I'm going to make sure of it." Ellie says. She rubs his head until he falls into a deep sleep. It is only then that she allows herself to stand up and join Pat in the sparklingly clean kitchen. "I don't know what to do." She admits.

"We'll figure it out." He encourages, "he'll be alright. I promise."

And there it is folks. This is my langest one shot so it took a bit longer. Anyways I know this is probably super inaccurate but this is fanfic so who cares. Yeah I hope you liked it, feel free to give me a prompt and as always have an incredible day!

~Natalie