hoooo boy, how has quarantine been treating you guys? 2020 has felt like a fever dream so far, but I got this hilarious prompt on Tumblr about Papyrus dealing with the lockdown by going to the forest and becoming a cryptid and honestly, that is too funny not to write


The search lasted for three days.

Three days that didn't feel like three days, more like three months or three years, or three hours. Time was beginning to blur for Sans in a way that was uncomfortable and way too reminiscent of something else entirely he rather not think about. His human therapist had told him this was not an uncommon experience during a period like this and he hadn't corrected them.

How long had Papyrus even been gone? Sans wasn't about to admit he didn't know, because he rather suspected Undyne would break every single bone that made up his body if he did, and he really needed those bones. But the truth was he hadn't even noticed his brother was gone at first. Things were crazy - had been crazy for weeks now - and there was no sign of it letting up anytime soon. Sans didn't leave the house unless he had a good reason to and more than anything he had a good reason not to now. He mostly spent time in his room, read books, scrolled the vast internet, and slept. There wasn't much else to do really.

And Papyrus did... Sans didn't know what Papyrus did during this time, but he thought it would just be the same things Papyrus did any other time when Sans wasn't looking. But then the dishes in the sink kept piling up and the heap of socks on the living room floor started to reassemble the pyramids of Egypt and Sans had thought, 'I sure do wonder when Papyrus is gonna pick those up', before ordering take-out from Grillby's for dinner.

The next morning their electricity got cut because the bills hadn't been paid and Sans realized that maybe the dishes and the socks were a bad sign.

Panic didn't set in immediately. Papyrus had taken his violin and the pet rock, so Sans was pretty sure he had not been kidnapped. Unless the kidnappers were looking for a concert and a dissertation on proper pet care at least. But he called Papyrus about a gazillion times and his brother did not pick up. Sans texted, and Papyrus did not respond.

The search lasted for three days, during which Sans had exaggerated his original assessment that "this must be Papyrus' idea of teen rebellion" into "this must be Papyrus' idea of a midlife crisis" until he arrived at the final and most logical conclusion that Papyrus must be absolutely, most certainly dead.

Papyrus was not absolutely, most certainly dead. He was quite fine, as he assured Sans multiple times, while Sans tried to not channel his inner Undyne (not a phrase he would often use) and break Papyrus in half. Mostly since that was a fight he was not prepared to have and was definitely not going to win. But it simmered beneath the surface as Papyrus stared at him, a wreath of baby's breath and wild ginger on his head, blinking at him with the innocence of a fawn.

For all Sans knew of his brother, this was quite the opposite.

"You scared me half to death," Sans said, solemnly, seriously.

"I see you are being hyperbolic for dramatic purposes," Papyrus answered, then went back to braiding another flower crown of red and blue blossoms.

There had been no cellphone reception in the forest was a much more simple and less gruesome conclusion.

Sans sat down and pulled up his legs before he lost one of his slippers into the stream running through the meadow. "Well, not me maybe. But plenty of people."

Papyrus scoffed. "Hardly my fault they made me a being of myth, Sans." He plucked some blades of long grass to tie his creation together. "Humans are fanciful."

"Tell me about it..." Sans groaned.

The only reason they had found Papyrus, the only way they had any idea of where he had disappeared to, was because Alphys had shown them an internet forum full of bizarre sightings humans had made in this area. Rumors spread like wildfire that something strange was living in the woods, something that wandered away from the paths and could only be caught by glimpses through the branches. Something tall and dangerous that abducted children and made them its dinner.

That last one was probably just a remnant of the superstitious humans had built around monsters over the year, but seeing a walking skeleton in the middle of the forest on your evening quarantine stroll was sure to upset folks. And the distant sounds of violin in the night did not help.

Sans shook his head. "Are you coming home?"

The question was considered for a moment, then Papyrus shrugged. "Am I?"

"Hey, I asked first."

"I rather like being a creature of myth, Sans."

Well, that was one way to put it. Sans was pretty sure it wouldn't be long before humans with cameras and popular youtube channels would be trampling through these woods in search of the cryptid rumored to live here. Papyrus would probably appreciate such a thing. "I think they're gonna build you a gift shop, Pap," he said.

"They better sell T-shirts." Papyrus turned to Sans and put the flower crown on his head, adjusting it so it wouldn't fall off easily. "I'm sorry, Sans."

"For what?"

"For leaving without warning. For getting tired of sitting at home and not being able to go anywhere or do anything. It feels like..."

Papyrus didn't finish his sentence, but Sans could do it for him. "Like the world is ending?"

"How come people think I'm the dramatic one," Papyrus shot back, but then followed it up with: "Maybe not ending but it certainly feels like nothing will ever be normal again. And that can be scary too."

Sans knew what that felt like and Papyrus knew it too.

"And living in the forest like some horrifying bedtime story for human children is not scary?"

Papyrus pushed him aside playfully and one of his slippers slid loose, falling into the stream with a little splash. Sans cursed but for once Papyrus ignored him.

"I'm just saying it's fun. It's not normal, and so the not-normal turns into not-not-normal, and feels a little more normal."

Sans watched his slipper float on its merry way, a lost cause. "I guess that makes sense."

"Of course it does!" Papyrus declared. "I should know, I'm an urban legend and have probably been around for centuries."

Sans scoffed but didn't disagree.

"Are you going to stay?" Papyrus asked like he didn't really care. The pet rock was sitting in the moss in front of them, its own dainty little flower crown on its head. Papyrus had his violin in one hand as if perhaps he was waiting for an answer to decide to play or not.

Sans knew he would play anyway.

"I think I have to, bro," he answered, putting both hands behind his skull so he could lie down in the moss. "My slipper is probably gone all the way to the ocean by now. No way I'm getting it back."

"You can teleport."

"Too tired."

Papyrus started to play a tune, his favorite, one that was easy to fall asleep to. And Sans could sleep anywhere, so that worked out perfectly.


Tumblr: sharada-n