I wrote this in two days. My poor hands.
The camera opened on Don, the host of the popular Ridonculous Race. "Hey there!" He exclaimed, pointing at the camera. "Last time on the Ridonculous Race! We had a huge competition here in NYC! There was a lot of backstabbing, a bunch of tension, and only two winners!"
Don paused, and began to pace. "Since then, we've gone off the air for about six years. But today, that finally changes. We're bringing back some of your absolute favorite contestants, and even some of the ones you absolutely hate for another season, and another million dollars."
"Let's do a bit of an introduction before the theme plays," Don grinned, and pointed offscreen. "Returning from last season are… the Fashion Bloggers! The Police Cadets! The Sisters! The Rockers! The Adversity Twins! The Daters! The Reality TV Pros! And… The Ice Dancers?" Don looked at his cue card curiously. "I didn't approve them," he said to an intern offscreen.
Josee and Jacques leapt into the frame while a triumphant theme played. "I don't think you'll have to worry about us this year," Josee gave a fake smile, and pointed to a medal on her chest.
/
Confessional- Ice Dancers
"We got into the Olympics again, and we took the whole thing home!" Jacques grinned, pointing to his medal.
Josee grinned. "Maybe it was because someone didn't drop me this time," she nudged her partner.
Jacques responded wordlessly, picking her up and throwing her out of the frame and the sound of a thud and the camera shaking ended the Confessional.
/
"How on Earth did you win anything?" MacArthur snorted. "You lost in this stupid game after all."
Josee's left eye twitched. "Because I'm a winner and you aren't, I'll let the slide. For now."
"We also got a major boost in our popularity!" Tom exclaimed, handing Mickey a fez. "Ever since fezes blew up, we've been receiving non-stop orders! We're practically millionaires already!"
Emma raised an eyebrow. "Then how come you're here at all?"
"Publicity," Jen replied simply. There were choking sounds, and the cast turned to see Mickey choking on air, and holding the fez.
"MacArthur!" Sanders exclaimed. "Code two three five eight!" She dashed forward, grabbing Mickey and heimliching him.
Mickey fell to the ground limply. "I appreciate it Ms. Smith," he said dizzily.
"Thank you for helping him out," Jay said to Sanders. "But he wasn't really choking on anything. He was having an allergic reaction to the material of the fez."
The Daters exchanged looks. "What material is that?"
Jay rubbed his chin. "I'm not sure. Mickey isn't allergic to wool or anything like that."
Tom and Jen laughed nervously and exchanged looks.
"We haven't heard much from you guys yet-" Rock said, turning around and pausing. "...oh."
Emma and Noah were kissing while Kitty and Owen were standing around them looking rather awkward.
"Of course they didn't have anything to say," Josee rolled her eyes.
"Let's get to the newbies," Don smiled. "We have the Sleepers, Hanbei and Eric!"
Hanbei was a boy with black hair and a long light blue robe that almost looked like a blanket, and Eric was wearing sweatpants and a loose t-shirt.
"You made our team the Sleepers?" Eric asked incredulously.
Hanbei shrugged. "It was the first thing that came to mind when I was filling out the application."
"What about me?!" Eric demanded. "I don't like sleeping nearly as much as you do!"
"No take-backs!" Hanbei grinned.
Don nodded. "Next the Detectives, Corollary and Akira!"
The two of them were wearing trench coats, the big difference was their hair. Akira's hair was unkempt and long, while Corollary's was styled with a thin part on the left side.
"Hey Don," Corollary said, taking a slight bow. "We're honored to be here."
Akira nodded, crossing his arm and looking around at the other contestants. "Allergic reaction recently?" He asked Mickey, who was still rubbing his nose.
"Yeah," Jay replied. "How did you know?"
Akira frowned. "His posture indicates a great deal of pain, and his rubbing of the nose leads me to believe he either ran into a pole or had an allergic reaction. But because you two are the 'Adversity Twins', I assumed the latter."
"Never make assumptions," Corollary turned to his partner. "It's a dangerous weapon."
Stephanie's expression changed. "Wait. How did you know they were the Adversity Twins?"
"We did a great deal of research on our opponents before coming here," Corollary rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "My apologies, but we needed to know what we were up against."
/
Confessional- Police Cadets
"I don't trust 'em," MacArthur crossed her arms. "Not a bit."
Sanders sighed. "You don't trust anyone, MacArthur."
"And that's how we won the million last time," MacArthur grinned. "So I'm going to do the same thing again!"
/
"Our next newbies, the Life-Long Friends!" Don waved. It was a pair of girls, one of which was wearing a black headband and all black while the other was decked out in full soccer attire.
Corollary studied them with curiosity while Akira went more directly, sticking out his hand.
"It's a pleasure to meet you!" Akira smiled, taking the soccer one's hand.
The Soccer girl smiled. "Thanks! My name is Emily, and that's Sydney over there!"
Sydney gave a shy wave, and Akira gave her a small nod.
"Out of the way!" A voice shouted from behind Akira, Emily, and Sydney.
"Look out!" Akira squeaked, tackling Emily to side as two men barreled into the frame. The small one didn't stop, instead running head-first into Owen, knocking both of them off their feet.
The taller one with messy blonde hair clapped his hands together. "Nice try Brandon!" He laughed. "I won that one though!"
Brandon shook his head, getting up off the ground. "No way! I won that one fair and square!"
"Owen!" Kitty exclaimed, running over and lending him a hand. "Noah! He's your partner!"
Noah and Emma separated, and looked at Owen on the ground.
"Oh my GOD!" Noah put emphasis on the last word. "What happened?"
Brandon rubbed his head. "Sorry, that was mostly my fault."
"Mostly?" Hanbei yawned.
Brandon's partner turned to Don. "Hey, can we get a photo finish to see who won the race?"
Don nodded. "Sure, I'm sure we have one no where!" He yelled. "We're live, you think we're gonna pause the entire show so we can know who won between you and Brandon?"
"Uh… yeah," the boy said.
"Unbelievable," Don face-palmed. "Anyway, these two are the…" He looked at his cue card and burst out laughing. "The.. Physical Bros? Is that right, Connor?"
Connor shrugged. "Yeah? What's the problem?"
"Maybe you're too young to get it," Don wiped a tear from his eye. "Anywho, our next pair are the King and Guard, Isaac and Thomas!"
Isaac was wearing a silver shirt, black pants, and a golden crown, while Thomas was fully decked out in medieval armor, which had a giant golden cross in the middle. Thomas was by far the bulkiest man there, even putting MacArthur to shame.
"King?" Kitty asked, poking Don's arm. "You're a king?" She turned to Isaac.
Isaac chucked. "Diplomatically. In all honesty, it's just a title. You don't have to treat me any differently."
"However, if you double-cross my lord-" Thomas began.
Isaac cut him off exasperatedly. "Thomas. We're here to play the game, not to make idle threats. You see, I applied to Total Drama: Revenge of the Island, but Thomas here insisted I didn't go. But I finally convinced him to come here with me."
Thomas nodded. "My sole duty is to protect you, milord."
Isaac mumbled something under his breath, but the two walked forward and joined the other contestants. Akira offered them a handshake.
"And now for the new old ones!" Don exclaimed. "Old contestants that we forcibly put back on the show!"
Jacques recoiled. "Forcibly?"
"H-how?" Mickey asked timidly.
Don shrugged. "I dunno. Some lawyers talked about contracts and all that. Apparently they had to kidnap Heather. Speaking of Heather, the Totally Not Daters!"
Heather and Alejandro entered the frame. Heather scoffed. "What kind of a name is that?!"
"I think it's quite fitting," Alejandro smiled at Don. "After all, it does reflect our status in this game."
Gwen entered the frame, rolling her eyes. "Yeah. Save it. So… whose team am I on?" She looked pointedly at Don. "Knowing this network, probably Duncan or Trent, right?"
Don chuckled and channeled his inner Chris. "It's even better!" He grinned, and gave a signal.
A cage fell out of the sky, covered by a large carpet. Gwen stepped away from the cage and gulped. "There's only one person I know who needs this and it's-"
"Courtney?" Don asked, leaning in beside her and pressing a button.
The carpet flew off the cage, unveiling an almost rabid Courtney chewing on her own leg.
"Oh brother," Gwen facepalmed. "Another season of this? Why not just take us back to Camp Wawankwa?"
Don shrugged. "We'll see. By the way, I let Courtney name your team. She called you the Traitors, so here we are."
Gwen screamed and punched Courtney's cage, who looked rather proud of herself.
/
Confessional- Courtney (Traitors)
"I don't need to win against that wannabe Goth anymore," Courtney smirked. "Just as long as I can take her down with me."
/
"Next is the Magicians, Harold and Leonard!" Don looked at his cue card. "Wait, Leonard? Of the LARPers?"
"Indeed! It is I!" Leonard strolled into frame with Harold by his side. "I have returned once again for the million dollars!"
Harold rolled his eyes. "I'll have you know, the only reason I let your lawyer ninjas kidnap me was so that I could be on a team with LeShawna. And you betrayed my trust. Not cool."
"You know, instead of blaming me, you could try and.. Win the million?" Don suggested.
"I could win the million if I really wanted to," Harold bragged. "But if I did, it would make courting LeShawna too easy. And I like challenges."
Heather grimaced. "You've got your work cut out for you either way, Dorus."
"Oh not at all," Alejandro reassured the group. "I believe that the fair LeShawna would practically swoon for Harold here if he were to win the million. Although it is a pretty big if."
Harold frowned. "I won't take this sitting down from you after you tried to seduce my soulmate."
"What?" Alejandro smiled. "Little man is trying to put up a fight? If memory serves, you managed to stab yourself with a laser sword last time." The background music was beginning to swell.
"It's called a lightsaber! And it was a dramatic sacrifice!"
"It's called being a nerd and voting yourself off!"
Harold and Alejandro were right in eachother's faces when Don smiled and hopped in between the two. "How about we introduce the next contestants?" He asked, pushing the two apart.
/
Confessional- Magicians
"If I wasn't going to win before, I certainly am now!" Harold said, a bit peeved.
Leonard threw some confetti in the air. "Indeed comrade! Come! Let us work together and achieve our victory!"
/
"The Parisians! Beth and Lindsay!" Don introduced the pair of best friends.
Beth and Lindsay both squealed as they entered the frame. "Oh. My God!" Lindsay screamed. "New York is just as cool as I thought!"
Beth frowned. "You've already been to New York Linds. You went here last season."
"No, last season I was flushed down a toilet," Lindsay recalled. "And also I think Tyler was there. He's just the best boyfriend!"
Beth looked at her awkwardly, but didn't question her logic.
"The Marines! Duncan and Brick!" Don cheered.
Duncan rolled his eyes. "Really? I have to be with straight-lace over here?"
"On the contrary sir!" Brick saluted him. "As our platoon leader, I believe you'll find I'll be loyal to you as long as we don't break any international laws?"
Duncan's expression turned into a smile. "Alright then. I like where this is headed."
"Or the Geneva Convention," Brick clarified, clearing his throat,
Duncan's expression immediately turned into a look of shock when he saw Courtney, and just barely leapt out of the way as Courtney leapt at him.
"Man down! I repeat, we have a man down!" Brick exclaimed. Gwen was just barely pulling Courtney back, who was clawing at Duncan.
"Can I get some help over here?!" Duncan cried. Heather and Alejandro exchanged glances.
/
Confessional- Totally Not Daters
"You know, I would help out Duncan, but he's pretty fierce," Alejandro explained.
Heather snorted. "Speak for yourself. I just hold a grudge against him for that Ezekiel challenge way back when."
"And that grudge is why I lo-" Alejandro began, but Heather was giving him a look of intense hatred. "Love being your teamie!"
/
"And we have the Lovers!" Don waved his hand.
Cody and Sierra entered the frame, Cody looking incredibly nervous. "Look, I don't mind being on a team with Sierra," Cody explained. "But the Lovers?"
"I let Sierra name the team," Don shrugged.
Sierra gave Cody a grin, and Cody sighed, looking at the ground.
"Our penultimate team.. The Islanders!" Don waved his hand, revealing Bridgette.
Bridgette grinned. "Oh, the Islanders? Who's my teammate? Is it Zoey? Or maybe Jasmine, I liked her on Pahkitew."
"About that," Don said. "See, we were going to pair you up with Sugar, but unfortunately, her 'craptry' career took off and her agent declined. So we went with the next best thing!"
"Hi!" Dave entered the frame and gave Bridgette a friendly wave.
Bridgette frowned. "Why?"
"I dunno," Don replied. "He was the only one willing to come back on the show, and no one else really seemed to want him."
Gwen raised her hand enthusiastically. "Me! I'd take him! I'd take him!"
"Normally, I'd kill you," Courtney threatened. "But I wouldn't mind having Bridgette on my team, so I won't."
Don shook his head. "The teams are already decided. There's no take backs!"
"I guess it could have been worse," Bridgette said, looking at Dave. "I prefer you to Sugar at least."
"Same!" Dave replied happily.
"And our final team, the Sun and Moon!" Don clapped his hands together.
Dawn entered the frame. "I see! You called me the Moon because… that's quite humorous!" She giggled. "Now who is the S-"
A loud yelling was heard as Scott barreled into the frame with a shark tooth knife waving around.
"I should have known." Dawn said melodramatically. "I felt that dark aura from miles away."
Don shrugged. "And yet… you didn't."
"Pleasure to be here, Don," Scott sneered, throwing and catching his shark tooth.
Don and Dawn both began to speak at the same time, but realized their names were the complete same when said out loud.
"Who were you-" Dawn began.
"Forget about it," Don cut her off. "Now that we're all here, I think it's time we begin the race. You'll be racing around the world, and the last one to each Carpet of Completion fails and is cut from the competition. There are no non-elimination rounds this season, so every choice you'll ever make counts."
Mickey raised his hand. "No non-elimination rounds? But last season-"
"Well in this season, we have seasoned veterans," Don replied icily. "And some newbies, but mostly veterans. Regardless, since the Police Cadets are the ones who technically made it the furthest last season that are still in the game, they get to take the first tip from the Don Box," he pointed to the tip-dispenser that was his likeness.
"Sweet!" MacArthur pounded her fist. "Come on Sanders!"
Sanders sighed and followed her partner begrudgingly. As the Police Cadets approached the Don Box, Sanders began to become more nervous. "Remember MacArthur, it matters who takes the tip! One of us might have to… skydive from the Empire State Building! And that's why I think you should take it."
"That's mighty nice of yeh," MacArthur nudged her partner. "Don't worry, I want to do all the interesting stuff too."
MacArthur tapped the top of the Don Box, and read the tip, and then handed it to Sanders. Sanders nodded determinedly. "Roll out!" She cried, and the Police Cadets took off.
There was an awkward silence after the Cadets left, and Don broke the silence by coughing. "Yeah, I didn't really have a list of names for everyone else, so it's first come first serve now," he explained.
And just like that, forty teenagers ran over Don, all struggling for the Don Box.
/
Confessional- Sisters
"I can't believe how unfair this is!" Emma complained. "If Don had kept going like that, it would have been us taking the Tip third!"
Kitty nodded in agreement. "Instead of eighth or something. It was kind of hard to tell- there was a lot of scrambling."
/
"For this challenge, teams will have to make a traditional New York-style pizza!" Don grinned as the last of the competitors, The Adversity Twins, took off. "Not only that, the person who did not pick up the tip must then eat the whole thing! It's a fun competition that will put some people in a world of hurt!"
/
The Police Cadets were in a taxi. "Of course Don would switch it up on us!" Sanders banged the car seat. "Now I have to eat your cooking?!"
"I'm not happy about it either," MacArthur replied, crossing her arms. "I definitely could have gone for some good pizza."
/
"I can't complain too much about the challenge," Rock explained as he and the Daters were running side by side. "Luckily, Spud took the tip, and he's a human trash compactor!"
Stephanie, holding the tip, gulped. "Ryan, you took that cooking class I wanted you to take, right?"
Ryan blinked. "Um. Yeah, yeah, definitely." He rubbed the back of his neck, but they kept running.
/
"Is New York pizza like Paris pizza?" Lindsay asked Beth as they ran through New York.
Beth shook her head. "No, New York pizza is longer and thinner that Chicago pizza." She looked at the tip. "I hope you don't mind eating."
"Nope!" Lindsay grinned. "After all, the Paris people have a whole tower named after pizza!"
"That's.. The leaning tower of Piza, Linds," Beth said exasperatedly. "And it's in Italy, not France."
Lindsay shrugged. "To-may-to, to-mah-to!"
/
Confessional- The Parisians
"You know, Linds has never been someone who sweats the details," Beth smiled at her partner. "And that's what I think makes us such a great team."
Linds smiled and nodded. "That's me! I'll do whatever the tip says!"
/
"I'm glad I took the tip!" Courtney grinned maniacally as Gwen ran alongside her. "I hope you like pizza, Gwen!"
Gwen sighed. "You know, we could lose the game if you made bad pizza. We could also win the whole thing if you put effort into it."
"I guess you're right," Courtney said sensibly. "Luckily, I don't care about winning!"
/
The camera opened on Don standing in the pizzeria with DJ behind the counter. "So, you were one of the originals, huh?" Don asked him.
"Yeah, but I gave up that life," DJ smiled. "Now, I'm a good old fashioned pizza chef! It's not much, but I take pride in what I do."
Don smiled at him. "Well, what more can you do?" He looked at the camera and shook his head.
"We made it!" Heather cheered as the Totally Not Daters entered the pizzeria, completely out of breath.
"Congratulations Totally Not Daters!" Don said. "You're officially the first ones to arrive."
Alejandro nearly collapsed. "Only because we didn't read the tip! You just said pizzeria and bolted!"
"Whatever," Heather rolled her eyes. "Looks like… I have to make a pizza, and you have to eat it."
Alejandro sighed. "Oh brother…"
Heather walked behind the counter. "Oh. Hey DJ!" She said to the gentle giant, giving him a high-five.
"It's good to see you!" DJ said. "Okay, so I'm the 'pizza instructor'. So first you're going to want some dough…"
"Can I have some of that 'Momma Spice'?" Heather asked. "It'd help a lot!"
DJ shook his head. "That'd be cheating. Sorry Heather."
/
The Sisters and Reality TV Pros were sharing a cab. "It's so cool to work with you guys again!" Owen said politely.
"It's super cool to work with you, too!" Kitty smiled at Owen. "I'm sure Emma and Noah are glad as well."
Noah nodded. "Yeah! So we have our iron-clad alliance again, right?"
"We shouldn't make it public," Emma advised. "With people like the Totally Not Daters and the Ice Dancers, it might be dangerous."
"I never really cared about them," Owen mused. "I've always been in it for fun. And the cheese!"
/
Confessional- Reality TV Pros
"You know, it's been a long time coming, but for once I actually feel really good about our chances on this show," Noah said. "We're one of the only ones with experience, and we have an alliance with one of the top-placing teams from last time!"
Owen grinned. "And you don't have to worry about Emma liking you this time!"
"Exactly!" Noah pumped his fist. "I feel like the king of the world!"
/
"Sleepers!" Don said, surprised. "It feels weird to say this, but congratulations, you're the fifth to arrive!"
Hanbei nodded. "Okay, I'll get cooking, and you better get ready to eat!"
"This is the most fired-up I've seen you since that sleep-a-thon," Eric said, bemused.
"Well I'm awake anyway," Hanbei yawned. "Might as well win."
Hanbei joined Tom, Heather, MacArthur, Josee, and Harold behind the counter.
"I'd like you to hold the onion," Leonard said to Harold. "The onion has always had a sense of evil to it."
Harold nodded. "Worry not my friend! My mad culinary skills do not require the foul onion!"
/
"Hurry up!" Stephanie screamed to Ryan. "We're going to be one of the last ones to arrive!"
"Maybe if you weren't shrieking, I'd run faster!" Ryan shouted back. He stopped for a minute and looked around. "Hey, where did the Rockers go?"
Stephanie also paused. "What do you mean?"
"I thought they were with us," Ryan commented. "Oh well."
/
"Ha! I win again!" Connor cried as he and Brandon slid into the Pizzeria, just behind the Detectives and the Lovers.
Akira was about to say something, but Corollary put a finger to his mouth.
"So.. you're cooking then?" Sierra asked Cody, examining the tip.
Cody grinned. "I'm a cooking wizard Sierra! I got this!"
Corollary studied the Lovers. "I hope you have that kind of enthusiasm, Akira."
"I won't let you down," Akira said happily.
/
We're finally here!" Noah cried as the Reality TV Pros and Sisters got out of the taxi.
Kitty grimaced. "Look at how many people are here!"
"Don't worry about it, Kit," Emma reassured her. "I'm a speedy chef!" She ran in the door and slid over the counter.
Don looked over at the Daters, who were just arriving. "Did you run the whole way here? Oh well, you're the sixteenth team to arrive."
Stephanie gaped. "SIXTEEN?!"
"Well, you're still ahead of the… Adversity Twins, the Rockers, the Islanders, the Marines, and the Sun and Moon," Don said.
Duncan and Brick ran in. "Rock on!" Duncan yelled, and leapt behind the counter, and Brick took a seat.
"Well.. you would have been ahead of them," Don said.
Ryan nodded and got behind the counter.
/
"It's been twenty minutes, and every team has arrived except for the Rockers," Don said. "And some of the teams are close to finishing."
/
Josee was waiting next to Jacques at one of the tables. "I can't believe I have to wait for my stupid pizza to cook."
"Right?" Heather said. "I should have just force-fed Charmer here something raw."
Scott's ears perked up. He was still getting out the ingredients. He dumped tomato sauce on the dough, and put some cheese on it, and then handed it to Dawn. "Hurry up. Eat it."
"What?!" Dawn sputtered. "Are you serious, I can't eat this! It has raw dough!"
"Yeah," Scott growled. "And I'll stuff you full of raw dough if we come in last. Eat!"
Dawn gave an exhausted sigh and picked up a knife.
/
"It is rather pleasant to be here, awaiting our food, is it not?" Alejandro asked Sierra and Lindsay.
Sierra nodded. "I have faith in my Cody-kins. He'd never let me down!"
"And Beth is so reliable," Lindsay smiled. "She could never let me down if she tried!"
"Are you sure?" Alejandro asked Lindsay. Sierra got up and walked away. "After all, isn't Beth mad that you got her arrested?"
Lindsay looked down. "Um… well…"
"If I were you, I'd eat with caution," Alejandro advised.
/
Confessional- Lovers
"I don't think we'll ever trust Alejandro," Sierra said. "Ever since World Tour, we've been a bit wary around people like him."
Cody nodded. "He was kind of a massive jerk, and in All-Stars he wasn't much better."
"We only need each other to win this race!" Sierra squealed and hugged Cody. For once Cody looked happy with her affection.
/
"Done!" Harold yelled enthusiastically as the timer dinged. He reached into the oven and picked up a perfect pizza. He then ran over to Leonard and dropped it on the table. "Bon appetit!"
Alejandro looked at Heather angrily. "How did he finish before you?"
"He's not the only one!" Tom said, rather pleased with himself. He pulled out a pizza and walked over to Jen. "I put a lot of air into the bread so that it limits the amount of calories." Tom threw his pizza into the air. "It's super light and fluffy!"
Jen laughed and took the pizza from Tom and took a bite out of the pizza.
"We got here first!" Alejandro shouted. "How are you not done yet?!"
"Done!" Leonard said excitedly, getting up.
Don was leaning against a back wall, with a Don box next to him. "And the Magicians of all people take first place! But watch out, the Fashion Bloggers are right behind you!"
"Second place!" Tom cheered. Harold slammed his hand on the Don Box and took the tip. Tom took it a second later.
"And the Cadets take third!" Sanders cried, jumping out of her seat. "With only minor food poisoning!"
MacArthur shrugged, and the Cadets jumped after the others.
"Come on!" Scott demanded, as Dawn choked down the last bit of raw dough. "And we take fourth!"
"Not so fast," Don put his hand out. "While yes, Dawn did eat the ingredients of a pizza, you didn't technically make one. So because of that, I'm giving you a one hour penalty."
Scott's eyes widened. "One hour?! You can't be serious."
"I don't think you have anything to worry about," Josee said as she pranced by. "The Rockers aren't even here yet."
Jacques pressed the Don Box and collected his tip.
/
"Ugh, finally!" Heather cried as Alejandro finished. "Let's go!"
Hanbei stood up right after them. "Follow those Not Daters!"
"Kitty!" Emma cried, throwing her pizza like a frisbee to her sister. "Hurry up!"
Noah gaped. "How did you get that done so quickly?"
"I have experience," Emma bragged. "See you on the carpet of completion!"
/
"Let's get a recap of where we are!" Don said, and pulled out a graphic that read the following:
1. Magicians
1. Fashion Bloggers
3. Police Cadets
4. Ice Dancers
5. Totally Not Daters
6. Sleepers
7. Detectives
8. Sisters
9. King and Guard
9. Adversity Twins
9. Daters
9. Physical Bros
9. Life-Long Friends
9. Lovers
9. Parisians
9. Traitors
9. Islanders
9. Marines
9. Reality TV Pros
?. Sun and Moon
21. Rockers
/
"More and more teams are finishing the first challenge as well!" Don said.
"Done!" Sydney cheered.
"Easy as pie!" Owen inhaled the entire pizza
"I'm done, Corporal!" Brick saluted Duncan
"It was delicious, milord," Thomas said to Isaac.
Don smiled. "And with the penalty slowly running down on the Sun and Moon, the remaining teams are stretched for time as the majority teams have moved to the second and final challenge! Speaking of the final challenge…"
/
Harold and Leonard paused in a recording studio. "What on the Shire?" Leonard questioned.
"'In honor of Black History Month, we're celebrating the Harlem Renaissance,'' Harold read. "'Select an instrument and play a jazzy tune, to be judged by our guest, Mr. Strumm Ming.'"
Leonard frowned. "I only play the pipes, what about you."
"I'll have you know I was in a boyband where I played the piano," Harold said. "This will be a piece of cake."
/
Don was still leaning against the back wall of the pizzeria when the Rockers finally entered. "Sorry about that Don," Rock said. "Spud got distracted by a vending machine full of choco-oinks, and managed to get us lost."
Spud was completely out of juice at this point. "Chocolatey… goodness…"
"Don't apologize to me," Don said. "You need to get working on the challenge before there's no one left!"
"Done!" Stephanie cried, and put down her plate. "Come on Ryan, we've got a challenge to win!"
/
Rock was standing behind the counter of the pizza shop with DJ. "So.. how do you make pizza exactly?" Rock asked. "I know it's got something to do with… tomatoes."
"There's more to pizza than just tomatoes you know," DJ said. "There's also cheese and bread. And you cook it to the point of pure perfection."
"Can't you just give me an instruction manual?" Rock asked exasperatedly.
/
"I'm done!" Lindsay cheered. Her and Beth ran out of the pizzeria, tapping the Don Box as they did so.
Gwen choked down a final bite. "Finally," she said, mouth full of pizza. She and Courtney ran out of the pizzeria.
"We're done!" Mickey cheered, and he and Jay exited.
"How much time is on our penalty?" Dawn asked, rubbing her stomach.
Don looked at his watch. "Forty-three."
"This is all your fault," Dawn said, before covering her mouth and running to the bathroom.
Scott chuckled and began juggling his shark tooth knife.
/
"We need an instrument," Heather explained. "Do you know how to play any instruments?"
Alejandro hesitated. "Let's see what they offer."
"Clarinet!" Sydney cried, reading the tip. "I'm so glad I took those lessons!"
Noah looked at Owen. "Do you play an instrument?"
"I did," Owen replied. "I took piano lessons for a while, but Mom let me quit."
"It's better than nothing," Noah sighed.
/
"Dibs on the instrument," Duncan said to Brick. "I play guitar, that's basically all of jazz."
Brick frowned. "I disagree. I find drums and trumpets more important because drums provide the beat and the trumpets are famous from people like Louis Armstrong."
"Yeah?" Duncan growled. "Do you even play drums or a trumpet?"
Brick shook his head.
/
"You see, the key to any jazz song is not the music, but the absence of music," Harold explained, chewing on the tip of his pencil. "As someone who went to Piano Steve's Synth Camp for three years, I can pretty easily stimulate the mus-"
Duncan ran up and punched Harold, knocking his glasses off. "Hey Dorus! You know, I kinda missed you."
"You mean you miss punching me," Harold said, wiping his glasses. "I know you're only here for musical advice, but I'm not giving you any."
Duncan did his best to look hurt. "What happened to the cool dude from the film set?"
"Unfortunately for you, he's in it to win it this time," Harold said dismissively.
/
Confessional- Magicians
"I know I said I didn't want to win before, but now I just want to beat Duncan to that finish line," Harold punched his fist. "For years I've had to deal with him, and just once, I'm going to outdo him."
Leonard cheered. "Huzzah!"
/
"How'd it go?" Brick asked, looking at a page with a staff on it.
Duncan shook his head. "Dweeb doesn't want to tell me anything. How goes the writing?"
"I have no idea," Brick admitted. "I've not really listened to jazz before."
"How hard can it be?" Duncan asked, picking up a guitar. "I'm just going to improv it."
/
Duncan walked up to a stage, with a guitar around his neck and played some random chords. He ended up with an interesting staccato rhythm that was surprisingly jazzy.
Ming applauded when he was done. "Jazz is all about improvising in the most creative way possible!" He complimented Duncan. "You really understand the medium, thumbs-up!"
Duncan looked rather pleased with himself as he and Brick walked over to the Carpet of Completion, while Harold snapped his pencil out of anger.
/
"Congratulations to the Marines!" Don said happily. "You guys are the first to complete our New York challenge!"
Duncan gave Brick a fist bump. "No sweat."
/
"How did Duncan beat us to the punch?!" Heather demanded. "Play something! Anything!"
Alejandro sighed, and picked up a tambourine.
As Alejandro walked up to the stage, Harold was playing "Last Surprise" on his keyboard and was greatly enjoying himself.
Ming gave him the thumbs-up and the Magicians bolted to the Carpet of Completion.
/
"Do you have any idea how to play jazz music?" Sanders asked MacArthur as Sydney passed them, clarinet in hand.
MacArthur looked down. "No. No idea."
"Allow me to assist," Akira volunteered, approaching them.
Sanders looked at him suspiciously. "Why? You're on a different team. What do you want?"
"I believe our interests are not so different," Akira said. "We both desire to keep order, do we not?"
Sanders and MacArthur exchanged glances.
/
Confessional- Police Cadets
"Look, if Akira wants to give advice, we might as well play him for the sucker," MacArthur laughed.
Sanders looked a bit more disgruntled. "It's by his good graces we were even able to finish the challenge, so I might be a bit more respectful."
"Oh come on," MacArthur continued laughing.
"Yeah," Sanders broke out into laughter and the two howled like hyenas.
/
"Hey, congratulations to the Life-Long Friends," Don smiled as Sydney and Emily crossed the Carpet of Completion. "And the Fashion Bloggers!"
/
Confessional- Fashion Bloggers
"How do you think I keep these fingers so smooth and powerful at the same time?" Tom asked, admiring his hands. "I played piano for ten years! Asking me to play a jazz song is like asking me to ride a tricycle!"
Jen frowned. "You never learned how to ride a bike though."
/
"Looking back to the pizzeria, Scott and Dawn's penalty have five minutes left, and the Rockers are still struggling," Don said.
Rock was pouring shredded cheese all over the burned product, before handing it to Spud. Spud devoured the whole thing in one bite.
/
Confessional- Rockers
"The thing that makes me the most angry about getting lost is that we totally could have dominated this challenge!" Rock said. "Pizza and music are sort of our thing!"
Spud looked down. "Sorry, man."
"Don't worry, we'll just put in the overtime to get the second challenge done in no time!" Rock exclaimed. "Rock on!"
/
"Penalty is off!" Don's voice came over the loudspeaker as the Rockers left the pizzeria.
Scott looked to Dawn. "Any music experience?"
"I played the violin in middle school," Dawn said. "Can we not move as fast? I'm still kind of sick."
Scott rolled his eyes. "As long as we get to the finish line before they do, I don't care how fast we go."
/
"Congratulations Detectives!" Don welcomed the Detectives to the Carpet of Completion. "I didn't know you had any musical experience."
Akira shrugged. "To be honest, jazz is all about improvisation, so we just did the opposite of what we'd normally do."
"Ice Dancers! Seventh place!" Don said as the Dancers stepped on the carpet.
/
Confessional- Ice Dancers
"You know, there was a time when a sixth place finish would upset us," Josee said. "But ever since winning a gold medal, this whole game seems worthless."
Jacques shrugged. "And if sixth place is the best we can do, then it's the best we can do."
"Indeed," Josee smiled.
/
"Welcome T-" Don looked incredulously. "Adversity Twins?!"
Jay nodded. "Ever since we bombed at air guitar, Mickey took some lessons, and it worked out pretty fine."
"Behind the Adversity Twins?!" Emma cried as she and Kitty crossed the Carpet.
Mickey gave a nervous laugh. "Looks like for once we beat you at instruments!"
/
"The heat is turning up as more and more people begin to finish the final challenge," Don said. It cut to the Sleepers, the Traitors, the Lovers, and the Reality TV Pros completing their challenges. "Sleepers in tenth! Traitors in eleventh! Lovers in twelfth! Real-" The music cut off as Emma and Noah began kissing again on the Carpet of Completion.
Don looked extremely unamused. "Get off my good carpet you two."
"Excellent!" Ming said, as Isaac finished playing a violin. "You're good too," he said to Alejandro.
"Finally!" Heather screeched. She and Alejandro took off to the Carpet.
Thomas approached Isaac. "Shall we also run to the Carpet?"
"I see no rush," Isaac said. The two walked over to the Carpet.
/
"Hurry up!" Stephanie yelled. "The Rockers are on their way!"
Lindsay cheered. "Yay! We're done!"
"Only fifteen minutes later than we should have been!" Beth said condescendingly. "Hurry up, we can't come in last!"
"Us either!" Connor turned to Brandon. "Let's book it!"
Bridgette breathed a sigh of relief. "It's a good thing I took guitar lessons."
"Yeah, really," Dave said. "You're really good at it though."
Bridgette crossed her arms. "Let's try to get to the finish line first."
"Okay, let's try and knock this out really quick!" Rock said, grabbing a bass guitar.
"Oh no you don't," Scott yelled, tackling Rock, as Dawn ran by him.
"Ow! What was that for?!" Rock demanded, before looking at the broken remains of his guitar. "Oh man!"
/
Confessional- Dawn (Sun and Moon)
"As much as I hate Scott, I might as well do my best to work with him," Dawn said. "He seems to be a team player at least."
/
Don was waiting at the carpet of completion, as Dawn stepped onto it, and Scott a minute later. "Congratulations guys," Don said. "You avoided dead last, meaning no elimination for you. As for the Rockers.." He looked at Rock and Spud who were walking up behind them.
"He broke my guitar!" Rock pointed at Scott. "What was I supposed to do?!"
Don shrugged. "Play another instrument I guess. Still, you guys are veterans. For shame."
/
Exiting Montage- Rockers
"You know, I was pretty bummed about the whole getting lost thing," Rock said. "But I guess someone had to go first."
Spud looked at his feet. "Sorry for that man."
"It's alright," Rock replied. "We'll just have to try harder next time."
/
"With that, our first challenge has concluded, and it's one of our veterans that's gone home, not one of the newbies!" Don said happily. "What's going to happen next? I don't know, you'll have to find out here! Next time on the Ridonculous Race!"
1st Place- Marines (Duncan + Brick)
2nd Place- Magicians Magicians (Harold + Leonard)
3rd Place- Police Cadets (MacArthur + Sanders)
4th Place- Life-Long Friends (Sydney + Emily)
5th Place- Fashion Bloggers (Tom + Jen)
6th Place- Detectives (Corollary + Akira)
7th Place- Ice Dancers (Josee + Jacques)
8th Place- Adversity Twins (Mickey + Jay)
9th Place- Sisters (Emma + Kitty)
10th Place- Sleepers (Hanbei + Eric)
11th Place- Traitors (Gwen + Courtney)
12th Place- Lovers (Cody + Sierra)
13th Place- Reality TV Pros (Owen + Noah)
14th Place- Totally Not Daters (Heather + Alejandro)
15th Place- King and Guard (Isaac + Thomas)
16th Place- Physical Bros (Brandon + Connor)
17th Place- Parisians (Beth + Lindsay)
18th Place- Daters (Ryan + Stephanie)
19th Place- Islanders (Dave + Bridgette)
20th Place- Sun and Moon (Scott + Dawn)
21st Place- Rockers (Rock + Spud)
The purpose of this episode was definitely to lay the foundation for the series, not to set up the characters, so there might not be a lot of character variety for the newbies, but with that being said, be sure to say what your favorite team is to win!
