Imperfections and Captain Levi

The stars shone brightly against the dark blanket of the night, the leaves of the nearby tree dancing with the harsh wind. She could feel the grass beneath them poking through the blanket they were sitting on. It was a cold cold evening and Petra knew that their pathetically thin blanket was virtually useless against the cold breeze of the night even as she sat within Levi's embrace.

She pulled the blanket closer to her body and she felt Levi shiver behind her, tightening his arms against hers. She rested her head on his shoulder, her forehead touching his neck, cuddling closer to the warmth his body radiated. She sighed contently while she shut her eyes.

"Shit I'm fucking freezing." A smile settled on Petra's face. She changed her angle so that she could look at him straight in the eye.

"Hey don't blame me this was your idea," she said, her light tone seemingly making his frown deeper.

"Shut up," he muttered gruffly. He snuggled closer to her, reverting her back to her previous position to rest his cold forehead against her shoulders. Petra shivered at the contact.

"What are we doing here anyway?" she whispered. It felt strangely appropriate that she spoke quietly with him so close to her like this.

"Just wait okay? Eat some more sandwiches or some shit," he mumbled, his lips brushing the skin of her neck with every word. "I have this all planned out. I even asked Hange and shit. Look-just shut up," he yawned, exhaustion permeating his voice.

Petra wanted to ask him what he asked Hange for but realized that, unlike her who had at least 4 or 5 hours of sleep, Levi probably hadn't slept a wink this night since he was stuck with paperwork and then presumably invited her to go on a picnic immediately after he was finished with it.

It came as a total surprise when Levi woke her up literally minutes ago and asked her out. At first she was extremely confused. It was a few hours before sunrise and though Levi barely sleeps, she knows how much he hates getting up in the morning.

But before she could protest, Levi lifted his right hand holding a wicker basket filled with fruits and sandwiches and drinks and blankets ("Did you prepare that?" "Yeah I did, now get your ass moving."). They were going on a picnic, he said, in that field several distance away from the barracks so as to not get caught.

Petra understands all the lengths they had to go to not get discovered, it's not like they can go parading hand in hand in broad daylight-she might get fired, rumors of him taking advantage of his young subordinate could spread, the reputation of the survey corps itself might become worse and all that stuff. So most of the time, they just lie in bed together, talking, cuddling, fucking, or just staring at each other.

She heard his breath come in soft exhales and Petra thought that he's finally asleep. Petra knows that picnics are normally the kind of dates where couples talk on and on and on while munching on food but she knows that Levi's much needed rest was more important than chitchat.

Levi rarely sleeps, he never did tell her why but she guessed it was probably because of his nightmares. The fact that The Captain Levi had nightmares and fears seemed weirdly out of place. For as long as she can remember Petra had been in love with Captain Levi, or at least she was with this grandiose perfect caricature of him.

In her teens, she admired the courageous and selfless hero that is Humanity's Strongest. In her mind, he was this invulnerable soldier who can strike down 5, maybe even 10, titans in one go! He inspired her to be brave and enlist in the military and he doesn't even know she existed yet. (plus he's really handsome too)

Then she became a member of his squad and everything she thought of the glorious hero that is Captain Levi turned out to be false.

He's short, as short as his temper she noticed. He frowned all the time, which reminded Petra of those pesky trolls in stories she would read as a child. He curses like crazy, has manners but rarely shows them, and is often standoffish.

If she was going to be honest, the hormonal teenage girl within her was immensely disappointed when she met him.

Petra reached for the nearby thermos of tea and carefully poured herself a cup to not disturb Levi. She was about to take a sip when she saw moving lights in her cup. She looked up and her hand flew to lips in gasp.

The stars were falling.

Bright orbs danced across the sky leaving a trail of light behind them and Petra had never seen anything more wonderful. Her eyes remained locked to the sky in pure awe, sounds of amazement tumbling out of her lips. She didn't even notice that Levi had woken up from her gasps.

"Shit did I miss it?" Levi drawled, his bloodshot eyes squinted at Petra, arms instinctively tightening around her frame. A yawn erupted from his lips.

"No-It just started," Petra babbled, shifting in her place to face him directly. She looped her arms through his neck, keeping her head up to not lose sight of the stars. "Levi, it's so beautiful."

"You like it?" Petra could only nod, her lips too busy smiling to form coherent words. She peppered his nose, his cheeks, his lips-just about any place she can reach if she's honest-with kisses, the butterflies in her stomach fluttering in excitement and joy.

"Is this the reason why we're freezing our asses here?" She pulled her face away to look at him properly, thumbing the small smile present on his lips.

"Was it worth it?"

Petra thought a simple 'Yes' would be insufficient to the efforts Levi went through to give her this moment. So to answer his question, she pulled him closer, a giggle escaping her mouth, to taste him again.

As their relationship progressed, Petra realized how incredibly imperfect and humane Levi was. He wasn't this untouchable being that was a level above other humans. He's just Levi. Short, high-strung, ill-mannered, unapproachable Captain Levi.

When her perception of Levi became grounded in reality, she started to appreciate his other attributes. He's brave and short and skilled and rude and fearless and compassionate.

Being his lover revealed another layer of him that not a lot of people have seen. He's not very verbal with his feelings and would rather express them through stolen kisses or clandestine caresses. Petra almost always makes the first move but he would take control soon thereafter. He's an overly jealous man and would always look daggers to any man near Petra but would never tell her how he feels; he wouldn't say it unless Petra specifically confronts him about it because he knows it's an irrational feeling that he can't stop.

He was all of these things at once, good and bad, and it was, dare she say it, one of the main reasons why she fell in love with him deeper and deeper everyday.