October 17th, 1976
"Padfoot." Remus whispered to me around 4am. I turned in my spot on the floor, my back cracking uncomfortably. I debated not answering. The boys had all come upstairs about an hour ago, completely hammered, and fallen asleep immediately. I doubt James, Pete or Frank had even noticed that Addison was sleeping soundly in my bed. But Remus had waited to speak until James's snores had deepened, indicating he was unlikely to wake up for anything less than a nuclear strike. We had one time dropped an entire bucket of ice-cold water on him at 5am, and he hadn't so much as stirred. When he woke up two hours later for breakfast, he told us that he had a dream he was caught in a tidal wave and couldn't swim. Remus clearly didn't want James to overhear our conversation, so I figure it must be important.
"Yeah, Moony?" I sighed.
"I overheard you and Jase talking downstairs."
Fuck. I forgot about Moony's super-hearing…especially so close to a full moon, he would have been able to hear me perfectly even from across the room.
"Well, no use in me trying to come up with an excuse." I sighed again, sitting up to look at Remus in his bed. Through the moonlight, I could see Remus sitting up, his hair messy and sticking up in all directions.
"What happened?" He asked, looking over at Addison who was still sleeping soundly in my bed.
"Look, I can't tell you what happened. But something did happen, and Whitmore is a total asshole. We need to make sure he doesn't come near Addie again. I'm trying to get her to tell McGonagall or Dumbledore, but she won't even tell James."
"Okay, well then don't tell me either. It's up to her to tell who she is comfortable with, but I think it's a good thing to have an extra set of eyes watching out for her," Remus said patiently, accepting that I wasn't going to tell him what actually happened between the two. I'm sure he had an idea, but it was up to Addison to put a name to it, when she was ready. "I'm mostly just confused that she told you?"
"Trust me, Moony, so am I." I said, letting my head fall back onto my pillow. Letting my eyes close, I said "I told her about my family." I said simply.
Moony was quiet for a long time. I didn't move. He and I both knew what it meant for me to tell her; it meant I trusted her as much as I trusted the Marauders. Even I don't really know what had caused me to tell her that night – I knew that she had been upset, and not herself. I had missed the banter, and the way her eyes lit up when we really got in to it. Addie was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, even from the time we were young and I barely knew what a girl was. Her dark brown hair always got messy when she was angry, and her eyes sparked with an internal fire. As we had gotten older, I realized that the more I annoyed her, the prettier she got – and I was a sucker for a pretty girl. But Addie was also smart, and talented, and wicked on a broomstick, and...fuck. I was in love with her. I must have been for a long time, but it took seeing her in pain to knock some sense in to me. But she was so upset about everything that happened with Jase that I was going to have to back off, and keep my feelings to myself. There was no way she was ready for me to suddenly announce my feelings, and I don't want to do anything to upset her or ruin our burgeoning friendship. All I could do is be there for her, in any way that she asked me to be.
Moony still hadn't said anything, and with the new revelation of my feelings I wasn't feeling up to talking about it any longer. I rolled over on the floor, looked up at the girl I was in love with, fast asleep in my bed, and wished more than anything that I was sleeping there next to her.
My pillow was perfect this morning; it was soft, and smelled amazing. I nuzzled in further, not willing to open my eyes yet. I inhaled deeply, smelling leather and smoke…yep, definitely not my pillow. I groaned, remembering where I was. I opened one eye; my head turned to the side, and saw Sirius on the ground, fast asleep. His shaggy hair was falling into his eyes…his eyes…that I told him were beautiful last night. I groaned, again, and brought my hands up to rub my eyes. I really embarrassed myself last night, but Sirius was such a gentleman and took care of me. I guess I get a pass, this time, but I'm going to have to start being careful about what I say to him from now on. I can't let him know that I'm starting to fall for him, especially when I know that I can't commit to anything. Not that he would even want to commit to something – he never has before with any other girl. Ugh, this was too much thought this early in the morning. Especially when I should be thinking about how I was going to get out of here without waking any of the boys up.
"Good morning, sunshine." I groaned, once again. I should have realized that James was awake – it had been far too quiet in the room.
"Good morning, James." I said, falsely cheery. I sat up and stretched; extending my arms all the way out and letting my muscles quake. "Beautiful morning, isn't it?"
"Could be better. Now, Addie, do you want to tell me what you are doing in my best friend's bed?" I turned to look at James. He was sitting primly on the edge of his bed, hands folded in his lap, and staring at me with a stern look on his face.
"No, not really James." I said promptly, continuing to stretch.
"Addison Marie Jones, tell me that you are not dating Sirius Black." James said, still staring at my sternly.
"What?" I laughed, "Of course not James, why would you think that?"
"Because you are in his bed, and not in your own bed?" James was getting angry, his face heating up and flushing red.
"Okay. But James, if we were dating, don't you think Sirius would be in the bed with me?" I asked, incredulous, and getting upset. I don't know if I was getting upset because James would think that Sirius and I were dating, or because he was angry at the idea.
"I…guess so?" James was stumped, the color fading quickly from his cheeks. "But if it's not because you snuck up here for a late night shag, then why are you here?" He asked, scrunching his eyebrows like he was thinking hard of another possible explanation.
"I was drunk, and came up here to wait for you so we could talk. I feel like we haven't talked at all! I guess I fell asleep, and Sirius came up and couldn't get me to move, so he just made a bed on the ground. He complained about it enough, so don't worry I've already been punished," I said, thinking on my feet. That made sense – when I drank, I did fall asleep and I was impossible to move.
"Oh. Okay then. I'm sorry we haven't had a chance to talk, and that I ran away last night. Lily just looked…perfect. And she finally said yes, and I just got distracted, but I'm sorry." James had gotten up, mid-speech, to sit next to me. He had to do some interesting maneuvering to make sure he didn't step on Sirius, who was still fast asleep and drooling. He threw his arm around my shoulder and pulled me in tight. I didn't throw him off this time, although I noted that his touch still made me uncomfortable – James and I were used to touching, to cuddling, to being in each other's space, so if I kept avoiding him he would definitely get suspicious. I tried to relax in to his grip, and succeeded somewhat.
"It's okay, I understand that last night was important for you." I said, shrugging, my face pressed against his chest. I was happy he had at least thrown a shirt on before I had woken up.
"Yeah, but that's no reason to ignore you. Let's sneak down to the kitchens tonight, have some tea and cookies, and play a game of chess? Just us two?" James asked. Sneaking down to the kitchens to play chess was a tradition for us. James and I had become friends our first year, a couple of days after Sirius had found me crying outside of the common room. Lewis had told me about the kitchens before I started, and told me that most students found out about it around their third year, when an older student let it slip. He had wanted me to have a leg up, and a place to go for tea if I was upset. One night I had snuck down, and was tucking in to a plate of cookies that a lovely house elf, Posey, had arranged for me, when the portrait opened again. James had walked in, looking like he owned the place, but had stopped dead when he saw me. Turns out, James's dad had gotten drunk a couple of nights before he had left for Hogwarts and let the secret slip, much to his mother's displeasure. He had thought he was the only first year to know the secret, but he had wasted no time in sitting next to me, grabbing a cookie, and pulling out a chess set. We had played until 4AM, and then snuck back to the common room under his invisibility cloak. We had been friends ever since, and had made sure to go down to the kitchens for a game of chess at least once a month. It makes for a nice change, it being just the two of us.
"That sounds great, James. I think I'd like to go back to my room now…can I borrow the cloak?" I trailed off awkwardly. James hated loaning out his cloak. His dad, Fleamont, had given it to him the night before he left for Hogwarts for the first time. It was a family tradition for the Potter men to pass the cloak to their eldest son before they started Hogwarts. James was an only child, so the cloak had been passed on to him, and he would pass it on to his son. James was constantly worried that we were trying to con him out of it, although he knew that we would never do such a thing. In fifth year, Peter had taken the cloak to sneak out and meet up with a Slytherin girl that he had been seeing, but by the time Peter had returned to the dorm room, James had been awake. Peter hadn't been able to sneak the cloak back in to James's trunk, and because he hadn't wanted to boys to know that he was shagging a Slytherin, he had let James think the cloak was missing for a whole week. I'd never seen James as mad as he had been when he found out what happened – not because Peter was involved with a Slytherin, but because he would steal the cloak and let James think it was missing. Peter had had to wear his underwear outside of his trousers for an entire day as punishment for this transgression, and he had been given a week's worth of detention from Professor McGonagall when he showed up to her class with his underwear out after being told to change at breakfast.
"Yeah, I wouldn't want anyone to think I was shagging Sirius either. Although you would deserve the rumors for the heart attack you gave me when I woke up and saw you in his bed…" James trailed off. He sat for a moment, considering his options, but he got up and started rummaging in his trunk. He pulled out the silver cloak and tossed it to me. The silky material nearly slipped through my fingers, but I managed to catch it.
"Thanks Potter, see ya tonight." I slipped the cloak on, tiptoed around Sirius, and made my way back to my dorm.
Thankfully, the girls were all still asleep, though they all looked worse for wear. Lily had managed to change in to her nightgown, but hadn't remembered to rub off the makeup, which had ran down her cheeks and stained her pillowcase; Mary and Alice had fallen asleep in Alice's bed, side by side; Marlene was face down in her bed, still wearing her tight leather skirt, which had bunched up around her hips during the night.
I tiptoed to my bed and glanced at my watch. It was only 7AM, much too early to wake up the girls to go down for breakfast – which they were all desperately going to need. I waved my wand, which I had pulled from the pocket of my jacket, and watched as the water pitcher filled five glasses with ice cold water; another wave of my wand and the glasses levitated to each of the girl's nightstands. The water would stay chilled for the girls to grab when they woke up. I picked up my glass and chugged, realizing I was incredibly parched from my own night of drinking. I greedily finished the water, put it back on my nightstand, and laid down in my bed. I leaned my head on my pillow, and noted that my pillow smelled like honey and rose, the scent of my shampoo and lotions. It was pleasant, but I found myself wishing for the leathery smell I had woken up to this morning. I raised my arm to my nose, sniffing the leather of the jacket I was still wearing, but it wasn't the same as Sirius's pillow. I grinned to myself under my arm, remembering Sirius's words last night. I started to imagine what it would be like to date Sirius, to be the one to tame the notorious rebel Black, the first Black in generations to not be a Slytherin; the heir to the Ancient and Most Noble House of Black, who had run away this summer and publically renounced his family's beliefs. I imagined us walking, hand in hand, down to Hogsmeade on Valentine's Day, getting tea at Madame Puddifoot's, kissing outside of the Three Broomsticks. Like last night, the idea of dating Sirius made my giddy. I know, deep down that Sirius would probably never be the stereotypical boyfriend that would take me on a romantic Valentine's Day date – that was far too cliché for him. But whoever did catch Sirius's heart would get to see that Sirius that I was beginning to get glimpses of – the diligent student, the caring brother and friend, the man brave enough to stand up to generations of familial prejudice – and she would be the luckiest girl in the world. And she probably wouldn't be me, no matter what he may drunkenly say. I just wasn't that girl.
Feeling slightly dejected, I sat up and tore off the jacket, tossing it to the ground. I shoved my face into my pillow, letting the honey and rose scents bathe me in a sense of familiarity. Feeling…if not better, then reassured, I let myself drift off to sleep.
"Merlin, I could kiss whoever remembered to pour us water last night" I awoke to Mary shrieking, at much too loud of volume for the rest of the hung-over girls. Marlene must have been thinking the same thing, because she groaned and threw her pillow in the general direction of the noise. The pillow missed and hit Alice in the face, who sat up and threw the pillow back at Marlene. Marlene groaned again, but sat up.
"Sorry, Alice." Marlene apologized, taking her own glass of water and finishing it in one gulp. I looked over to Lily, only to see her bed empty already.
"Does anyone know where Lily went? Breakfasts only just started…" I trailed off.
"She probably went downstairs already. Let's go, I need some bacon right now." Marlene said, dropping two drops of a hangover potion into her open mouth. Immediately, the color came back to her skin and her skin regained her natural dewy look. "Hangover potion?" She said, offering the bottle to me. I shook my head no, but Alice popped up and took the potion from her, taking two drops before handing it to Mary.
Once everyone had gotten rid of their hangovers – all praising magic, unable to imagine how muggles managed without potions – we all quickly bathed, changed into casual wear and made our way downstairs for breakfast. Lily was already sitting at the table, across from James. They were having a quiet conversation as Lily buttered her toast. I slid in next to James, and slipped the cloak back into his bag under the table. I winked at him when he turned to look at me.
"Good morning, Addie." James said, patting his bag in thanks. I smiled back and said my hellos to Lily, while pouring myself a glass of pumpkin juice.
"You two got up early!" Alice said sweetly, taking her seat next to Lily.
"I just wanted to get an early start to revising today, and James happened to be down here when I came down," Lily blushed, ignoring everyone's eyes.
"I got up early to do some research on some new Quidditch plays I want to practice this week," James shrugged, answering the question nobody had asked yet.
The two were already so cute, and they had yet to go on a date yet, let alone kiss or hold hands…or touch in any way other than Lily's hand slapping James's face…which had only happened a few times, and James definitely had deserved it. I shook my head, knowing that we were just at the beginning of these two ruining love for the rest of us forever. If I believed anything, it is that Lily and James will teach the rest of us what true love looks like.
I decided to hang around for Sirius to come down. Maybe I was getting my hopes up, but lately, Sirius was the only one who I felt calm around. Plus, I needed to ask him for a favor. The rest of the Marauders came down 20 minutes later and sat around our little group. Lily, Mary and Alice had left for the library a few minutes ago, so it was just James, Marlene and I waiting when they reached the table.
"Sirius, take my seat! I see Boot walking in, and I'd like to have a conversation with him about a broom cupboard." Marlene said with a wink, getting up from her seat next to me and gliding her way over to where Boot and Michael Brown had just entered. I saw Boot blush furiously, glance at Michael, but nod enthusiastically at Marlene before they both turned and walked out of the Great Hall. Michael shook his head in exasperation, but walked into the Great Hall anyway.
"Hey, Potter. My dad told me he would replace my broom, since I made the team. He sent over a Quality Quidditch Supplies catalogue, and I'd love your opinion if you're not busy?" Michael asked James, pulling the catalogue out of his bag. James's eyes lit up, and he immediately turned and started debating the different models of broomsticks with Michael. I took my chance to ask Sirius for my favor, while James was distracted.
"Hey, Sirius?" I asked hesitantly. I bit my lip while I waited for Sirius to stop chewing his toast.
"What's up, Jones?" He asked. I noticed that he was back to calling me by my last name, but I decided to ignore it.
"I'm supposed to hang out with James tonight in the kitchens. I think I want to tell him what happened." I said slowly, judging his reaction. My heart started beating fast in my chest, worried that Sirius would say no when I asked him to come with me.
"Okay. What time? I'll walk down with you." Sirius quickly assured me, looking like it was the most natural assumption in the world that he was coming with me.
"You…are offering to come with me?" I asked, in disbelief.
"Do you not want me to? I just thought you might want the support. But if you want to do it alone, I totally understand." He quickly said.
"No! Please, come with me. I was going to ask you if you would, I'm just surprised you offered first." I reassured him, smiling broadly.
"Okay, then we'll do it together." Sirius smiled back, grabbing my hand under the table and giving it a quick squeeze, before letting go and turning back to his toast. My hand buzzed from where he had touched it, and I felt my heart start to flutter.
It was such a simple thing – a promise to help. But Sirius did it so sincerely, and steadfast in his support, that I felt like I could do anything. As long as I had Sirius by my side, I started to believe that I would be able to get through this…that I would be able to get through…anything.
