June 2nd, 1979

Lily and James moved in to their cottage in Godric's Hollow slowly during the month of May. James had decided it was time to move out of his parent's manor – he said he was reminded of them everywhere he turned. He wanted somewhere to make new memories with Lily once they were finally a family, somewhere not tainted by painful memories. Lily had insisted, however, that they hold their wedding in the manor's beautiful gardens, before they closed its doors for the foreseeable future. The gardens looked magical; twinkling lights had been strung in all of the trees and bushes and a white canopy tent was set up in the center of the lawn with a dance floor underneath. The garden paths were lined with lanterns filled with glittering fairies lining the way through the maze of hedges.

"Here you go, kitten." Sirius sat down next to me at our table, sliding a mixed drink over towards me. I took a sip of the firewhiskey and butterbeer cocktail, and sighed in satisfaction. The bartender was making my drinks perfectly – Sirius had made sure of it. I kissed his cheek in thanks, and turned back to my conversation with Alastor Moody.

"So any unforgiveable?" I asked in disbelief. Moody had been telling me how Barty Crouch, the same man who had sat as judge during my trial, had authorized Aurors to use unforgiveable curses against their opponents – something that hadn't been done since they were outlawed more than 200 years ago.

"Oh yeah," Sirius commented, sipping on his firewhiskey. "I forgot to tell you when I got home from work last night." We'd barely been able to say hello last night when he'd come home from work, as he and I were both running off to James and Lily's stag nights, respectively. Lily had kept it quiet, a night in the cottage drinking wine and reminiscing on our Hogwarts days. By the state Sirius was in this morning when we arrived at the Manor to get ready, I can only assume that they boys were not as tame as we were.

"Barty Crouch is a mad man who has no idea what Auror training is all about," Moody growled, slamming his drink down on the table. "Auror training is about detaining the victim, and now he's telling my staff to kill rather than capture. It's outrageous!"

I tapped my fingers on the table, thinking deeply. On one hand, I understood why Crouch would want to change the policy. From what Sirius had told me, the Aurors had been losing a lot of Death Eaters because they were hesitating to use more aggressive spells; when you're aiming to capture, there is a natural hesitation that occurs when you are debating if you need to escalate the situation or not, and the Death Eaters have been exploiting those moments of hesitation to escape. On the other hand, knowing that Regulus is out there makes me want to keep him out of the way of potentially lethal spells as much as possible. If it were a choice between Regulus being killed by Aurors and being captured by Aurors, I'd choose captured.

"I don't feel great about being told to kill either," Sirius admitted. He put his hand on my leg and rubbed small circles, like he always did when he was anxious. "Everyone deserves a fair trial."

"I totally agree," I nodded. Thinking back to my trial with Jase, I was happy that he was given his day in court. I knew at the end of the day that he was guilty, but how many people out there were falsely accused? It was so important that everyone get their chance to defend themselves and for the truth to come out.

"You would," Moody roared. "It worked out well for you. Yeah, I remember you. Black too. You both handled it very well." Moody was giving me an approving look, scrutinizing me through his magical eye. "Honestly, that's the day I started to keep an eye out for you Black. A fire like you showed, I just knew you'd end up in my office."

"Really?" Sirius asked, clearly taken aback. I didn't know that Moody had even remembered my trial; it must have been just one of a hundred similar ones he had sat on that year alone.

"Well…to be honest, I didn't know which side of the law you'd be standing on, but I knew I'd be seeing you again," Moody laughed and clapped Sirius on the back. Sirius laughed as well, tapping his glass to Moody's in a cheers.

"I'll drink to that," Sirius chuckled, finishing his drink. "But now, I'm afraid I really must dance with my beautiful wife. If you'll excuse us." He put his glass down and got up, extending his hand to me. I took it and allowed him to pull me from my seat. He spun me on to the dance floor and I giggled as he started dancing outrageously to the upbeat song the band was playing. I saw Lily and James in the center of the dance floor with Remus and Peter. Lily and James had decided, with everything going on, to keep the wedding very small. Only about twenty people attended, but everyone seemed to be having a lovely time. Frank and Alice were sitting talking to Petunia, who was extremely pregnant, and her husband Vernon. Out of everyone, they were the best choice to entertain the snotty couple, and Lily was happy that she didn't have to worry about them. Marlene and Mary were dancing with a couple of Aurors that James had invited. It was the first time any of us had seen Mary since graduating; she had come back from Egypt with a beautiful tan and a beau named Reg. Reg had been on vacation in Egypt when they had met, but he worked for the Ministry of Magic in the Department of Magical Maintenance; they had managed the entire year she was abroad dating long distance, and according to Marlene there were wedding bells in her future as well.

The band started playing a slow song and Sirius pulled me to his chest. "You look gorgeous tonight," He murmured into my hair. His hands were playing with my spine like a guitar, plucking at the strings of my heart. I laid my head on his chest, inhaling the familiar scent of leather and pine.

"Thanks, love. You look very fetching in your dress robes as well," I winked at him, pressing a kiss to his chest. It felt so good being in the moment with him, just holding each other and enjoying being together. It felt like these moments were fleeting, like we never knew what was going to happen next. We both felt that we had to hold on for dear life to any small moment of peace because it very well may be our last. After our encounter with Regulus, things had gotten much worse. Attacks were happening much more frequently; just last week Gideon and Fabian Prewett, members of the Order of the Phoenix, were cornered badly by Antonin Dolohov and had just barely managed to escape. He was proving to be a particularly powerful wizard, and had been the catalyst for most of the activity within the last couple of months. He was slippery, and the Aurors had yet to be able to capture him; Sirius thinks it's just a matter of time before he kills someone on our side. Molly was besides herself when Arthur had told her that her brothers had been in a fire fight with a Death Eater – I'd had to watch the kids for the night so that she could calm down.

The song changed and I looked around the tent. Lily and James were swaying sweetly in the middle of the dance floor. Lily's long red hair was curled and she had a fresh lily pinned behind one ear. She wore a necklace in which she had enclosed one of the dried lilies that James had given her in the fifth year. I knew she had saved some!

James was the happiest I had ever seen him. He had cried throughout the entire ceremony, but once they were officially married a grin had taken over. He hadn't let the grin falter at all throughout the night; he had all of his best friends with him, the woman of his dreams, and he had even managed to convince his idol, Dumbledore, to attend. Dumbledore was currently twirling Professor McGonagall around the dance floor. McGonagall was blushing furiously and had pinched her hat with her fingers to ensure it didn't fly off during Dumbledore's exuberant dancing.

Sirius was watching everyone sway to the music with a soft smile on his lips. He had been awfully pensive the entire night, not the life of the party like I had expected. "Everything okay?" I asked, picking my head up off his chest and looking up into his eyes.

He nodded, and looked down at me. "Yeah. Just…seems surreal that in the face of so much danger, we can all be so happy. James finally married Lily Evans, and she is just as in love with him as he is with her. I've been married to the love of my life for six months, and I never thought I would even settle down. Remus and Nicoletta have been keeping in touch, and I think he's a little smitten with her. Even Pete seems like he found someone."

"Do you ever feel guilty for feeling so much joy when everything around us is going to shit?" I asked him, voicing something that had been bothering me but that I hadn't dared to mention.

Sirius didn't answer me right away. He thought it over, chewing his lips. "I think it proves that no matter what, life goes on. People will always fall in love, get married, have babies, grow their careers, experience heartbreak, and lose people that they love. Even in the darkest of times, life as normal continues and we just evolve around the times that we live in."

"When did you get so wise, Sirius Black?" I chuckled at his thoughtful response. Sometimes he really did take me by surprise.

"The day I admitted to myself that I wanted you," He winked charmingly at me. "Once I stopped being an absolute tosser, I realized I was actually fucking brilliant."

"You're still a tosser," I rolled my eyes at his inflated ego. That was the Sirius that I knew and loved; he still needed to be knocked down a peg every now and then.

"Addison Black," He put his hand over his heart and stepped back in mockery. "You wound me."

"Come here, you tosser," I teased, pulling him towards me by his tie and kissing him. Kissing Sirius never got old; every time we kissed I felt sparks fly just like they did the very first time. He tasted like firewhiskey and I moaned in to his mouth. Sirius deepened the kiss, kissing me like a thirsty man who had just found water. After a moment I felt something tug at my arm.

"It's not polite to be the center of attention at someone else's wedding!" James scolded, pulling me away from Sirius. "Sirius, as my best man it is your duty to dance with my blushing bride while I dance with my best friend…who happens to be your wife."

"I thought I was your best friend," Sirius complained.

"Nah, mate. It's always been Addie, you were just a placeholder for when she was busy or tired," James winked, and I stuck my tongue out at Sirius. James was better at knocking his ego down a peg than I was, because he wasn't holding back the urge to snog him all the time. Another slow song was playing, and James put one hand innocently on my waist while his other hand held mine. I saw Sirius do the same with Lily, and laughed when Lily put her hand on his shoulder, rather than on the small of his back.

"It really is a miracle, Jamie." I said suddenly, after a minute of swaying in silence.

"What is?" James asked, confused by my statement.

"Look at us! We're both married. To each other's best friend no less," I chuckled. "Did you ever really think you'd be able to convince Lily to so much as date you?"

"Of course I did," James said decisively. "I knew that persistence and sincerity were the only way to go with a woman as perfect as Lily Evans…Lily Potter now, I guess."

I smiled at her new name. James had always been sincere in his affections, that was true. He had been thoughtful, kind, genuine, if not insane, but sweet nonetheless. "What I can't believe is how you managed to take Sirius from a troubled teen to a man who would lay down his life for you. That man would kill someone with just one word from you. You should hear the way he talks about Whitmore; when that kid gets out of Azkaban he better flee the country."

"Sirius was always like that for his friends though. He just needed to accept that he was worthy of being loved. It was easy – I actually am still not really sure when it all changed between us. It was like once he opened up to me a little a waterfall erupted and we were both just…in love," I shrugged my shoulders, thinking back to how quickly Sirius and I had bonded.

"I think Sirius loved you from the very beginning. He won't ever admit it, but he used to talk about you all the time, even in first year. It wasn't nice, mind you, but he still was talking about you."

"When you grow up in a household where affection is shown only by withholding punishments, you get a little mixed up on how to express your positive feelings in a healthy way. It doesn't surprise me that his crush came out as teasing. He always associated love with pain; he loves his family, but only despite the things they have done to him," I said. I had thought about it a lot, how remarkably adjusted Sirius was now, despite how mixed up his feelings were as a young boy.

"All it took was you. I never did say thank you for that," James said, looking down at me sharply.

"Thank you for what?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.

"For loving my best friend more than he ever thought he deserved."

"In that case… thank you for loving my best friend enough for the two of you, while she took her time deciding if she was ready to return it."

We danced together for a little bit longer, holding on to the happiness of the moment. How everything seemed just a little bit more hopeful, a little bubble of peace in the midst of a nightmare. We didn't know that in just a few months, that bubble would burst and we would all be facing our biggest fears.


December 24th, 1979

"Sirius! Can you bring the pies out with you?" I called in to our kitchen. Lily, James, Remus, Peter, Alice, Frank, Marlene and Mary sat at our dining room table, which we had magically enchanted with a subtle extension charm so everyone could sit comfortably. As tomorrow was our wedding anniversary, we'd decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with our friends, pop over to see my dad and brother in the morning, and have a quiet night together tomorrow. "I made a mince pie and a cranberry pie, as I just could not decide which to make."

"Sounds great," James said, rubbing his stomach and taking a sip from his wine glass. I stood up and walked over to our bar cart to pick up the bottle of wine that Sirius had just opened.

"Can I top anyone off?" I asked, brandishing the bottle towards the table. James, Remus and Frank all nodded yes, so I refilled their cups. "Lily? Alice?"

Both girls immediately shook their heads no. I paused for a moment, wondering if I had refilled either of their cups the entire night. Or if I had seen them touch their wine glasses at all…

"Holy fucking hell," I exclaimed, dropping the bottle in shock. Blood red wine stained my white table, but I couldn't be bothered to even glance at the mess at the moment.

"What!" Sirius yelled, running in from the kitchen, a pie in each hand. "What happened?"

"You two are bloody pregnant!" I yelled in glee pointing to both Alice and Lily. Lily looked at James, and James shook his head in exasperation. He then shrugged and Lily smiled and nodded.

"Ahhhh!" I screamed, running around the table to hug Lily, and then Alice in turn. As my head was pressed in to Alice's neck from my awkward angle standing above her, I heard a clatter from behind me.

"Sirius Black, if you dropped one of my pies you are bloody well sleeping on the couch, with no hope of children in your future any time soon," I warned half-heartedly, knowing the pies were already done for.

"Sorry, dear," Sirius apologized meekly, muttering a cleaning spell to clean up the mess.

"We weren't bloody well planning on saying anything until 12 weeks. We're just about 7 and a half right now," Frank explained, shaking his head. Alice had put her hand over her stomach protectively, as if the baby could hear us cursing in front of it.

"When are you due?" Lily asked, her eyebrows knit together.

"August 1st," Alice confirmed, looking at Frank lovingly.

"Us too," James said. He laughed and clapped his hands together. "I guess we got lucky on the same night, eh Frank?"

Lily and Alice both hit their husbands who were laughing at James's joke. Sirius had cleaned up the pies, which were destroyed, and came to shake James's hand. "Merlin, James…a baby."

"You'll be godfather, yes? And you Addie, you'll be godmother?" James asked, getting up to pull Sirius in to a hug, completely ignoring Sirius's outstretched hand.

"Of course!" I exclaimed, the giddiness coming back. It felt as if my entire body was full of little pinpricks, the happiness taking me over completely.

Sirius pulled back from James's hug, tears in his eyes. "Really? You want me to be godfather?"

"Of course, mate. I know you'll take care of the little tyke, no matter what," James said solemnly.

"And you're okay with this?" Sirius addressed Lily this time. She nodded and stood up as well. She pulled Sirius in to a hug, maybe the first hug they had ever shared. When they broke apart, Sirius staggered over to the bar cart, poured himself a stiff whiskey and threw it back quickly before pouring himself another.

"I suggested it. You and Addie were the only people we even considered," Lily reassured, ignoring the mild protest from Peter.

"Not like they could leave an unemployed werewolf in charge," Remus chimed in, completely joking. After Remus's stint with the packs, he had lost his briefly held job at Flourish & Blotts, and he hadn't been able to find employment since. Peter was paying most of their rent, and I knew Sirius and James were helping him out as well – whenever he would accept it.

"Remus we –" James started, but Remus cut him off with a wave of his hand.

"I understand. I was just wondering when you would all catch on that they were both pregnant. I've known for weeks," Remus chuckled looking at both of the girls.

"But… how did you know?" Alice asked seriously, looking at Remus in confusion.

"Oh…uh. Well, I could hear them, actually," Remus admitted with a blush. He picked up his wine glass awkwardly and chugged the rest of his drink. He hated having to talk about his condition, but sometimes he slipped. I took my wand out and siphoned most of the wine back in to the bottle from the table, and refilled Remus's glass. He nodded his thanks to me

"You can hear them?" Lily asked excitedly. "That is so incredibly interesting. I wonder if lycanthropes can detect fetuses from the moment of conception, or if it's a certain time point that they start being able to? We can detect at three days. I wonder if your hearing is more accurate than our sonogram spell… oh this would be such an interested case study, and it would enable us to create more jobs for the werewolf community…I should really bring this up the Healer Jones on Monday…" Lily went off on her rant, her excitement building.

"Does she always get like this about medical stuff?" Sirius asked James.

"This is pretty tame," James nodded. "You should have seen her when they started doing modified charm treatments. I'm pretty sure we made the baby that weekend because it was the only way to get her to shut – sorry! I mean it was such a huge professional moment for you, and seeing you succeed made me want you even more."

Lily was threatening James with violence for talking crudely about her at the dinner table when an owl flew in. The regal black owl landed on the bar cart in front of Sirius and primly stuck its leg out. Sirius untied the letter, and the owl flew off immediately. He furrowed his eyebrows as he unrolled the parchment.

"It's…it's from my mom," He said slowly, as he recognized the handwriting. He read the letter quickly, before letting it fall from his hands in shock.

"What is it?" I said quickly, rushing over to Sirius. The look on his face made my heart stop, and I knew something terrible had happened. Sirius was frozen in his spot, and James reached down to pick up the letter. He scanned it quickly, before looking at Lily in shock.

He turned to address me and said in a small voice, "It's from Walburga. It says that his dad and brother both died within the last two weeks."

At James's words, Sirius fell to his knees, spilling his drink all over himself and the floor. I knelt down next to him, and pulled him in to my arms as the sobs took over his body.

"Shhhh…shhhh….it's okay. Baby, it's okay," I stroked his hair as his body shook. I had never seen him lose control like this, not even when he had lost Mr. and Mrs. Potter. This was pure, uninhibited anguish. Despite the grief I was feeling for Regulus, I knew that it was my time to be strong for Sirius, just as he had been strong for me on too many occasions to count.

Sirius stayed on the ground for the next several hours, alternating between complete silence and heartbreaking sobs. Lily had ushered out Alice, Frank, Marlene and Mary pretty quickly after receiving the letter; they all understood that right now was a time for family. After a while, Remus, Peter and Lily decided to turn in. James insisted that Lily take the couch, and spent a moment making it into a bed using our spare linens. Remus and Peter transfigured two napkins in to sleeping bags and set themselves up on our living room floor.

James sat next to me all night, consoling Sirius as he grieved. After his sobbing had calmed a little, James came out of the kitchen with three cups of tea, which he set down in front of each of us.

"He tried to tell me that he wanted to help, and I didn't believe him. Accused him of telling Voldemort about you. There are a hundred different ways that he could have found out about you, it's not like we're exactly fucking subtle. Any tosser from Hogwarts could tell him who you were. I thought by taking the precaution at our wedding, it would delay him from finding out your name, but that was just fucking optimistic. And then I accused my baby brother of selling you out, stormed away without even hearing him out. He tried to warn us to hide, he tried to tell us we were in danger, that he was in danger. And I did nothing…NOTHING!" Sirius exploded, suddenly, kicking the teacup in front of him. It hurled against the wall and shatter, tea splattering our wall.

Neither James nor I spoke, knowing that nothing we said to him right now would make him feel any better. He needed to rant, and get his emotions out. He needed to process the pain he feeling; the pain of losing a father that he hated, and the pain of losing a brother that he didn't, despite all of the evidence that he should.

"We could have helped him. We could have hidden him. And then he would still be here with us," he whispered, crossing his arms and leaning down on his knees. His body shook once more with sobs, and I threw both of my arms around him.

"Can I tell you something, love?" I asked tentatively after his sobs had quieted once more. Sirius sniffed and looked at me, nodding his head. His eyes were rimmed red, and his cheeks were blotchy. It broke my entire heart to see him in pain, and I hoped what I was about to say would help even a little.

"When you left the garage back in February, Regulus asked me a favor," I started, noting the bemused look on Sirius's face. "He asked me to try to make you see that he was trying. That he was trying to find a way out of his situation, and that he would do it even if he died trying. Regulus knew what he was doing, and I bet you that he went down trying to find a way out, trying to do some good. We don't know how he died, but I guarantee you that he was up to something, and he knew that it might end in his own death."

"All I can say is," James cut in. "That kid loved you, and because of that, there must have been some part of him that was good."

We sat in silence for the rest of the night, until eventually James decided it was time for him to turn in. He set up his own sleeping bag right at the base of the couch, so that he could hold Lily's hand, which was hanging over the edge.

"I'm sorry, love," I said finally, once it was just the two of us. I knew that it wasn't enough, that nothing would be enough to fill the gaping hole that he now felt. But over time, the hole would close slowly and he would begin to heal.

"Regulus was the last person I still considered family, 'sides my Aunt Andromeda, but I haven't seen her in years," Sirius lamented.

"I know. But you have me. And you have my dad and Lewis, and my crazy cousins. Plus you have Peter, Remus, James, Lily."

"And their baby. We have to take care of that baby. Protect it. That baby makes it out of this war, no matter what," Sirius said with extreme determination. He looked me in the eyes to make sure I was hearing him. "Promise me, Addie, that you will help me protect Lily and James's child."

"I promise. Children shouldn't be involved in the war, and I promise that we will keep their baby as far away as possible from it."