July 14th, 1981
"Nice one, Black!" Wes called to me after I made a good steal from the Appleby Arrows chaser. I chucked the quaffle to Baker, threw a smirk over my shoulder at Wes, and shot off down the field behind Ackerley. We were up 200-60, and I knew that Ellie was waiting for us to score one more time before she caught the snitch; in order to advance to the number one standing in the league, we had to win the game by 300 points. Turning my attention back to the game, Baker threw the quaffle to me, and I managed to dodge two of the Arrows chasers and a bludger. Ackerley got in to position next to the goalpost, and I passed him the quaffle, which he swiftly put in past the keeper.
I pumped my fist and saw Ellie shoot off upwards, clearly having had her eye on the snitch the entire time waiting for her opportunity to pounce. I raced down the field in the other direction, trying to intercept the quaffle that was being passed between the Arrows chasers. Just as one was pulling her arm back to make a shot on the goal, the Commentator announced, "Chapman catches the snitch! Puddlemere United wins, 360-60!"
I turned my broom around and flew towards the center of the pitch, where the rest of the team was gathering to celebrate our win. I was just hugging Ellie, jumping up and down when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned, a grin on my face, expecting Wesley, but was faced with Damian Crenshaw, our General Manager. The grin slipped immediately off my face, knowing from the look on his face that he had something bad to tell me.
"Is it Sirius?" I asked breathlessly, as if all of the air had been stolen from my lungs.
Damian shook his head, "Sirius is fine, but something did happen. It's better if he explains; he floo'd about fifteen minutes ago and asked that you come home immediately." Immediately the panic I felt subsided, knowing that Sirius was safe. I was lucky that Damian was as understanding as he is; I had explained to him when I was called up to the main team that my husband was an Auror, and would sometimes be sent out on missions unexpectedly. Without needing prompting, he had assured me that I would be given personal time to go home whenever needed. Damian's own father had been an Auror before he passed, so he understood wanting to be able to see him off before he left. I'm sure he expected that Sirius was involved in more than just official Auror missions, but he was kind enough to not ask questions. Sirius didn't call me home from work very often – in fact I could count on one hand the number of times he had – so whenever he did call, I knew it must be urgent.
I nodded my thanks to Damian, turned and rushed off the field. I pushed my way through the reporters who crowded the doors to the changing room. Not wanting to be rude and give them fodder to report something nasty in the papers about me, I stopped for a second. I ignored all of the questions they were calling to me, but I did blurt out, "I'm so sorry that I can't stay and answer some of your questions, but I just found out about a family emergency. I have to rush home, but I promise next match I will answer anything you want to know." Most of the reporters accepted this statement with little fanfare. One or two of the nicer reporters that I had gotten to know over the last year offered their condolences before turning to disperse.
"Does this have anything to do with your husband, Sirius Black? Rumor has it that he is a part of a secret organization, led by Albus Dumbledore, intent on destroying You-Know-Who. Care to comment?" Mara Skeeter asked in a high-pitched, nasal voice, quill in hand. Skeeter was one of the more difficult reporters that we had to deal with; she was snarky and sneaky, always asking questions specifically to take you off guard. She mainly reported gossip, but sometimes she did hit on a real story – obviously, since she seemed to somehow know about the Order of the Phoenix.
"I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. My husband is an Auror, and partakes in dangerous Ministry sanctioned missions that sometimes take him away from home," I replied calmly, invoking the answer Sirius and I had talked about in case I ever needed to make a statement to the press. We had been lucky; until now, nobody had ever brought him up to me. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to be getting home."
I pushed through the crowd of reporters into the locker room, hurrying to Damian's office and using his floo to go home. Sirius was waiting for me, standing right in front of the fireplace, with a look of complete anguish marring his handsome face. I rushed in to his arms, throwing myself against him completely, and melting in to his familiar form.
"Sirius, what is it?" I pleaded. With one look in to his eyes, seeing how glazed over they were, I knew that we had lost someone. "Who is it? Remus? Peter? Not Lily or James!"
"Marlene," Sirius answered stiffly. He detangled himself from my arms, walked over to the bar cart and poured two large glasses of firewhiskey. I sat down on the couch, accepting the tumbler numbly from Sirius as he sat down next to me.
"I don't understand…" I began, tucking my feet up under me. "Nobody knew she was part of the Order. She never went out on missions. Who would have done this? Who could have done this?"
"We were betrayed, obviously." Sirius was seething silently; the loud, boisterous anger he was so prone to as a teenager had simmered down to a more quiet rage. Sirius of the past would have been gone already, chasing someone down and making them pay for killing our friend. This version of Sirius was much more deadly – a calm, determined Sirius with a plan could do much more damage than a wild, spontaneous one.
"What happened?"
"It was Travers, at least that's what Snape has told us. He tracked her down, killed the entire family – her mom, dad, older sister, and kid brother. All gone – an entire family gone."
"Travers is the one from New Year's, right? The night they attacked Diagon Alley?"
Sirius nodded, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me towards him. He nestled his face in to my neck and breathed in deeply. "I'm so sorry, kitten. I know you loved Marlene."
I felt myself tear up. Sitting in Sirius's arms made it hard to believe that somewhere out there, Marlene's body was sitting, growing cold. "Who do you think did it? Someone must have betrayed her location – she told me last week that she had moved her family in to a safe house."
Sirius tightened his grip on me as he contemplated my question. He cleared his throat before answering me, so I knew I wasn't going to like what he was about to say. "Would you call me crazy if I told you that I think it's Remus?"
My immediate reaction was to vehemently defend Remus and his loyalties. I stopped myself though, and stopped to think about it. Remus had been gone almost the entire time since we had graduated; he had missed birthdays, nights out, weddings. We had definitely drifted from him, but I had to believe that he wouldn't betray his friends. "I mean, we have definitely all grown apart, but do you really believe he would betray us?"
"Do you remember that girl that he was dating? The muggle girl who worked in the bakery down the street from him?" I nodded at him that I remembered. "He never brought her up again, even though he seemed completely smitten with her. I did some digging the other day, popped down to the grocer myself and asked around. Turns out, she disappeared last year – completely gone without a trace."
"Well, that's definitely weird," I admitted.
"Not only that, but they told me that for years she had been talking about this guy she used to date; saying that she thought there may be something different about him, that he completely disappeared on her a couple of years ago, but she would see him randomly in a crowd but when she turned back around to get a better look, he would be gone."
"So Remus had been checking up on her, nothing too weird about that. Her disappearing is the weird part."
"Who would have even known who she was? Why did she disappear? Unless, Remus was worried that He would find out that he had dated a muggle, and would use it against him – so he took care of the problem before Voldemort found out," Sirius speculated. He took a large sip of his drink, letting the whiskey sit in his mouth and warm before swallowing it. "I just think it is so suspicious! If he had been checking up on her and he didn't have something to do with her disappearance, he would have said something to us when he realized she was missing. James and I could have helped."
"It's definitely weird, but I think you should talk to him," I admitted, thinking Sirius had a valid point. Remus was also one of the only people who knew were Marlene had been moved to – the Marauders were all privy to the information, in case of an emergency. "What about Peter? He knew where the safe house is, and he's been MIA all the time too."
"You think Pete is the traitor?" Sirius chuckled. "Peter wouldn't even talk back to Professor McGonagall, you think he went and joined up with Voldemort? He'd shit himself in terror and Voldemort would have laughed him out of this world. Plus, he was in love with Marlene, he would never give her up. I don't want to rush my judgment, but I really think we need to start being careful around Remus, all right kitten?"
I nodded, sure that Sirius was right. It made total sense that Remus would be the traitor – maybe all of that time spent with the werewolf packs had the opposite effect than intended. Instead of him convincing them to switch sides, he had been the one convinced to switch sides. I set my head down on his shoulder, content to spend a quiet evening at home mourning the loss of yet another loved one. With a heavy heart, I realized that it was getting easier and easier to deal with loss the longer this war went on. I wondered if I would ever get to the point where death would simply stop bothering me – whether it would just become an accepted part of life that we all had to adjust to.
October 28th, 1981
Kitten,
Snivellus thinks that our least favorite friend is going down south to meet with a pack of our furry friends.
Moony is going to try to get us Intel.
Bringing the twins as backup – we're going to stake out and make our move when the time is right. May be gone a while, so don't worry.
Don't come home. We don't want to tip them off that I am leaving.
I love you. Don't ever forget that.
Love always,
Padfoot
I took the letter out of the Black box that I had taken with me to store the letters Sirius sent me – although he always wrote in code, it was better to put them in a place where only he and I could access them. This particular letter had shown up last week. The team and I were in Ireland, as we had been since the first week of October. We had made it to the finals of the International Quidditch Cup, and the final match would take place on Halloween. I had known before I left that the Order was looking for leads on Travers, and I knew that this was a possibility; that it was a possibility Sirius would be sent away while I was gone. It hurt though, knowing that for the first time ever, Sirius had left without saying goodbye. I understood his need for subtlety and caution, but ever since I had received his letter, I had been in a state of complete worry. It had been hard to focus on the matches, but I knew that in order to keep up appearances, I had to hold it together.
I was just getting out of the bed in the room that had been rented for me at the Inn the team was staying in, deciding it was time to venture for some food, when the fireplace lit up with green flames. I gasped when I realized it was Sirius staggering out. Immediately, I could tell that something was wrong; he was barely able to stand upright and he was grasping the edge of the fireplace for support. I grabbed the bench that was sitting at the end of the bed and dragged it over to him. Sirius slumped down gratefully, and I started to assess the damage.
"I'm fine, kitten. Just bruised and battered," he assured me, taking the hand that was caressing his cheek and holding it in his own. He used it to pull me down to him roughly, capturing my lips in a bruising kiss. His hands wandered underneath the silk camisole I was wearing, and I could feel his excitement through his jeans.
"Sirius…" I trailed off when his lips wandered to my neck, finding the spot behind my ear that always drove me crazy. "Sirius, love! What happened?"
"Never again," he growled out between kisses. "Never fucking again."
"Never what?" I panted, Sirius's lips setting out to make me forget my own name. How he could hold any sort of conversation right now was beyond me.
"I am never leaving you again," Sirius whispered, growling out his words in a way that made me wish he would stop speaking. He moved up my neck, his lips barely ghosting my skin, until his nose touched mine. "No more words."
He stood up suddenly, my legs wrapping around his waist in shock. In one rough motion, he had thrown me down on the bed and covered my body with his own. The animalistic way he was moving tipped me off to the fact that something bad had happened; he was touching me as if he would fall apart if he weren't feeling my skin against his own. As if I were the only thing keeping him together.
Before I knew it, Sirius had slid my pants off and was moving his way down towards my legs. His mouth found me in my most sensitive area, and in minutes he had me screaming his name.
"I thought I said no more words," Sirius reprimanded playfully, nipping my thigh before soothing it with his tongue. I mewled under his ministrations, as he moved his way up my body, kissing every inch. My body heated everywhere that he touched me, until it felt like my entire body was on fire.
Sirius leveled himself with me, but he hesitated before continuing. With a troubled look on his face, he leaned down to kiss my cheek and whispered against my skin, "I thought I was going to die. And my last thought was that I didn't get to say goodbye. That I would never get to see you like this again. Never get to touch you, or taste you again."
"Shhh, love. I'm right here; I'm not going anywhere. No more words," I leaned up to kiss him, deepening it as I felt Sirius push forward. I sighed as we joined, having missed the feeling of him inside of me. It had been months since we had been together like this, and I had missed him terribly. The sound sparked something in him, and he picked up the pace. It was rough, and hurried, and passionate and everything that I loved about Sirius. There were times to make love, and there were times to fuck; this definitely was the latter.
We lay in each other's arms for a long time after, our hands lazily roaming each other's bodies. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" I asked, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. Sirius shifted, the covers falling down his well-toned chest. The last couple of years of intensive Auror training had done him well; he was even more attractive now than he had been at Hogwarts. With his silky black hair, mused from the last hour, and his steel grey eyes, he was still easily one of the most attractive wizards I had ever seen. I pushed that from my mind as he turned those beautiful eyes to me, full of sorrow.
"I took the Prewett twins with me to stake out the campsite. Remus showed up first, infiltrated himself with the pack and waited it out for Travers to show up. He showed up four days ago with a group of three, and followed the same schedule each day. Woke up at daybreak, met with the Alpha, retired for the day and returned during the evening to speak with the pack. Today, Gideon, Fabian and I agreed that we would ambush them when they returned in the evening. I sent word to Dumbledore, and we sent Remus the signal we had agreed on."
"And?" I prodded, when he seemed reluctant to continue.
"And, they were tipped off. They surrounded us when we went to attack. I got Travers, I think but…" He trailed off, avoiding my eyes. "Gideon and Fabian are dead. I'm sorry, Addie, I know that they were family."
"Poor Molly," I sighed, rubbing my eyes. "She just had another baby, did you know? A girl this time, Ginevra – they're calling her Ginny. Molly has been so excited to finally have another girl in the house."
"It's not fair!" Sirius burst out, gripping the sheets tightly. "They shouldn't have to grow up without their uncles. This whole thing is so fucked up! Somebody betrayed us, again and it's time we get to the bottom of it."
"Shhh," I comforted, pulling Sirius in to my arms. "I know, love. It's not fair that you don't have your brother, I don't have my mom, Lily and James lost both of their parents, we lost Marlene, and countless other families have been torn apart. But we just have to do everything we can to keep moving forward, and find a way to take this bastard down."
Sirius nodded at me, taking my face in his hands and kissing me sweetly. "I love you, Addison Black. Always."
"And I love you, Sirius Black." Sirius broke down as I held him. It was clear that this mission, and losing the Prewett brothers, had taken an emotional toll on him. I held him until he drifted off, enjoying how peaceful he looked in his sleep. Although I had to be up early tomorrow for practice, I stayed up most of the night watching him – knowing that our moments of peace were soon going to come to a blistering end. Call it intuition, call it paranoia, but I just knew that something big was going to happen…and soon. I took comfort in the fact that at the very least, I was totally and completely in love with this man that I held in my arms. And nothing could change that.
October 30th, 1981
Kitten,
I'm sorry for my abrupt departure the other day. I knew you had to be up early for practice, and I needed to come home and figure some things out. If I had stayed, I never would have let you get up and leave me.
I met with Prongs this morning, and he agreed with me that he needed to change Secret Keepers. With Moony possibly having joined You-Know-Who, we felt that it was safer to make a quiet switch, to throw him off our trail.
Dumbledore did the spell a few minutes ago; Wormtail is now the Secret Keeper. He hasn't been seen out in months, so he can go in to complete hiding without it being suspicious. I think this is the best thing for them – no one will ever suspect that they picked Wormtail.
Best of luck tomorrow, kitten. Know that I'll be listening and cheering the entire time; you'll be wonderful. I have late watch the night of Halloween, but I'll wake you up the next morning with your favorite scones from the Leaky Cauldron, and the promise to not leave our bed for the next week. I love you.
Love Always,
Padfoot
I smiled at Sirius's note, happy that he had done something to protect Lily and James. I put the letter into my box, snapped the lid closed, grabbed my broom, and left my hotel room to go practice for our match tomorrow.
