7.) Expect as Much
Remember, remember,
this is now,
and now,
and now.
-Sylvia Plath
REI
I awoke slowly, consciousness sliding together in small slivers. One of the first snatches of awareness was centred around the scent that filled my nose. It reminded me of the one family trip I'd taken to the ocean, it had rained the whole time... except for the last day right when we were leaving; the rain had lifted, leaving behind a clean fresh feeling with the ocean breeze. That was the smell I was waking up to. I smiled softly before opening my eyes. My whole soul knew what I was waking up to.
I opened my eyes slowly, still letting myself savour the lingering calm of sleep. It was rare that I felt this relaxed upon waking and I knew it was because of last night. Finally my eyes opened and the first thing I saw was Michiru wrapped securely in my arms. I pressed my face into her hair, inhaling deeply and then... I just lay there cherishing the moment. Michiru and I, we weren't exactly in a typical relationship but it worked for us. It kept me going.
Eventually I untangled myself from Michiru, being careful not to wake her in the process. I left her bed and dressed quietly. Before I left the room I kissed her lightly on the forehead.
"Thank you Michiru." I whispered, brushing my hand over her hair softly as I stepped back. I'd let her sleep. She'd understand my reason for not waking her. We didn't need to talk about what had happened.
I shut the door behind me, still feeling a remarkable sense of clarity. Michiru and I had a complicated relationship... but it was one that made everything else simpler. Just like in the past life I relied on her for understanding, she always sensed what was wrong and knew when I needed
guidance. And she almost always knew exactly what to do to keep me sane... she knew precisely what to give me. Some times it felt like she was all I had in this world. And she was always the one to bring me back from that frame of mind.
I walked down the staircase, grabbing my jacket from where we had discarded it the night before.
"You sneaking off without saying goodbye?" A voice asked from behind me. I spun around, Haruka was leaning in the doorway, watching me carefully. A smirk pasted on her face.
I didn't know what to say... I didn't know how she felt about this. I mean I'd just slept with her wife for gods' sake. My hesitation caused Haruka to chuckle.
"Come on, I made you some coffee. Figure you might need it after last night. I imagine you had a bit to drink." She said, jerking her head in the direction of the kitchen. I followed her in, tossing my jacket over the back of one of the chairs. Haruka passed me a mug of coffee, before sitting down at the table. I took a seat next to her, bringing the cup to my lips. Haruka smiled, this time it wasn't a smirk – it was an honest expression.
"You feeling better?" She asked, I could tell there were many questions behind that simple utterance. I looked up at her, feeling that sense of understanding pass between us like it had in the old world. I nodded, not able to find the words to address how much I appreciated it.
"How about you?" I asked in return. "Are you alright... with this?"
"Last time around I didn't fully comprehend what you two are to each other, this time I do." She gave a shrug. I still didn't fully understand what she was getting at. Haruka seemed to get that for she sighed and rubbed a hand along the back of her head, rising to her feet as she started to rummage in the cupboards.
"Listen Rei, if Michiru had done this with anyone but you, I'd be pissed off. But I know you care about her and respect what she and I have. You're happier with her in your life... and she's the same way. So I'm not going to get between you two. And if I can trust you with her; I can trust you with all of her." Haruka explained and while I had known she wouldn't be angry with me I hadn't expected this level of openness between us.
"I'd wager it helps knowing that this relationship between them is only an intermittent thing." Setsuna commented as she breezed into the kitchen. Haruka laughed.
"I guess that's part of it too." She replied, still chuckling. Setsuna allowed a smile to creep across her face as she watched Haruka. She then turned her attention to me.
"Good morning Rei." She greeted as if seeing me here was the most normal thing in the world. I nearly choked on my coffee as I realized that maybe for her it was.
"Morning." I managed, Haruka slapped a hand against my shoulder before turning her attention to the breakfast she was in the process of preparing. Setsuna's hand brushed against Haruka's arm gently as she reached up to grab a mug and in that action I saw something I hadn't before.
I raised my cup of coffee to my lips to hide my smile as I watched the two of them interact. The quiet conversation as Setsuna readied her coffee, the closeness of how they situated their bodies in relationship to one another. It was beyond friendship. It looked a lot more like how I imagined Michiru and I did.
I guess this was just how their relationship worked now. Michiru and Haruka were trying to keep everyone happy... and they had enough faith in the strength of their relationship to make it work. They knew they'd be together forever, there was no doubt about that.
A hand rested on my shoulder, pulling me out of my thoughts. I turned to look at who it was but was met by a pair of lips on mine. When Michiru pulled away she gave me a smile.
"I didn't expect you to stick around." She whispered. "But I'm glad that you did."
"Your spouse insisted that I stay." I replied, smiling in return as I gestured in Haruka's direction with my coffee mug. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Haruka watching us, Setsuna had drifted closer towards the table.
"Hmm." Michiru hummed. "I guess I'll have to thank her for that."
"Babe, the kitchen isn't the place for that kind of thank you. Especially not with company around." Haruka teased lightly, a suggestive grin on her face. I coughed lightly trying to cover up the laugh that was threatening to escape. I did my best to hide my smile as Michiru turned on her partner. There was a notably playful air around them. Setsuna rolled her eyes and sat down across from me as Michiru and Haruka had a whispered conversation.
I did my best to give them their privacy but it was kind of hard when I was so attuned to every one of Michiru's actions. The chemistry between the two of them was enthralling. And painfully familiar.
"How was the fashion thing?" I asked Setsuna, attempting to focus on her and not what was going on between Haruka and Michiru.
"It was lovely." Setsuna replied. "A weekend away from everything truly helped."
"Are you talking about yourself... or me?" I asked her, only half joking. Setsuna smiled again.
"Both. It was why I agreed to take part in this show."
"You knew what was going to happen?" I asked her, already knowing the answer. She nodded.
"I knew you and Michiru would end up together again. I decided to give you some privacy. Needless to say, Haruka and Hotaru enjoyed the brief holiday." Setsuna explained. I nearly choked, I'd completely forgotten about Hotaru. I took a hasty sip of coffee trying to cover up my horror.
Setsuna was watching me in amusement, she seemed to know exactly what was running through my mind.
"She knows her parents' love for each other is unshakable. You don't need to worry about that Rei."
"Guess I have to take your word for it, huh?" I asked, giving a bit of a smile. When she didn't answer I felt compelled to ask.
"So you've talked to her about... All of this?" I questioned, gesturing around the kitchen with my coffee mug. Setsuna's face softened.
"We hardly needed to. She asked us about it – wondering why we weren't together if we loved one another. This was before we met you and Michiru, mind. After that, she just seemed to know."
"Still all knowing then?" I joked.
"Or so she thinks." Setsuna rolled her eyes, then she paused; her head cocking to the side as if only just thinking of something now. It was a normal human reaction I wasn't used to seeing from her. "She's going to talk to you about something in a few moments so keep a civil tongue in your head, would you? She's already has enough bad habits from you and Haruka, she doesn't need any more."
I was just about to ask her what she was talking about when Hotaru swung around the corner into the kitchen.
"When's breakfast going to be ready?" She asked, looking toward Haruka and Michiru who were easing themselves apart. Her gaze quickly skittered away from them and landed on me. "Oh hey Rei, how are you doing?"
"Alright." I replied, flicking a glance at Setsuna wondering what she was concerned about.
"Even with all that stuff with Minako and Kunzite going on?" Hotaru asked. I frowned.
"Them getting engaged? Yeah, I'm fine." I lied, taking a sip of coffee. Hotaru looked confused.
"No, with them breaking up." She replied blankly. I practically spewed coffee across the table, instead starting into a coughing fit. Haruka crossed the kitchen with a bemused expression on her face to pat me on the back.
"They what?" I rasped out as Haruka and Setsuna shared some very significant glances.
"We should just show her. Minako's going to want to talk about it – she should at least be prepared." Haruka commented still looking towards Setsuna... even if her eyes did flick to Michiru for the briefest second.
Hotaru gave a theatrical sigh.
"Ugh, you guys are useless." She sighed, heading back out of the kitchen. "Be back in a minute, Rei."
"What's going on?" I asked Michiru, feeling a bit baffled.
"You haven't been checking the news have you?" She asked delicately, when I shook my head she continued. "I wasn't really expecting you too, what with everything else happening in your life..."
"You made the news." Haruka stated bluntly, cutting across Michiru's explanation. "And not just because of your father's death and the situation with AED. I mostly ignored it, figuring it was your business. But I can't guarantee that Minako and the others will see it that way."
"What was it?" I asked through gritted teeth and then Hotaru was back in the room, sliding a newspaper across the table. I looked down at it, flipping through the pages until I came across a photo.
A photo of Kunzite and I.
My mouth went dry as I read the article accompanying it. A brief description of our 'clandestine' meeting and Minako's and Kunzite's apparent break up.
"When?" I asked.
"Yesterday." Michiru answered softly. Haruka's hand tightened on my shoulder momentarily before she stepped away.
"Fuck." I swore under my breath, looking over the photo again; realizing how it probably looked to those unversed in the reality of the situation. Setsuna shot me a dark glare which I ignored, Hotaru would pick up the foul language sooner or later – Haruka would make sure of that. "You don't think Minako..?"
"Probably." Haruka replied honestly and was immediately socked in the arm by Michiru and Hotaru. "What?! She needs to be prepared for the possibility that Minako went to the absolute worst case scenario – it's what she's does. Even when it's not Rei."
"Thanks for that assessment Haruka, it made me feel real good about the situation." I commented dryly, cutting across any argument between them that could have erupted.
Haruka gave a low chuckle, meeting my eyes as if asking for forgiveness. I leaned back in my chair and sighed, running my hands back through my hair.
"It is what it is. I'll deal with it when the time comes." I sighed, hoping my tone was adequately dismissive.
It was all an act but I was too tired to deal with more drama right now. There was enough going on in my life, between the death of my father and the succession situation at AED, I was already expecting the media to be hounding me. Add in the surge of shadow appearances and I was looking at many a sleepless night.
Minako and Kunzite would just have to sort things out for themselves, this was not my problem.
Well, except for the fact I needed to think up a way to explain this to Minako when she inevitably approached me about it. With any luck I'd have at least a few days to think on the situation before having to deal with this.
"You're not even going to talk to her about this? You're just gonna sit around until she confronts you about it?" Haruka asked sounding a bit appalled at my lack of initiative. "Rei, I love you but you're a goddamn idiot. Do you think this is going to help you out where she's concerned? Fucking hell, you..."
I leaned forward in my chair, rested my elbows on their kitchen table and put my head in my hands. I just wanted the world to stop moving and leave me alone. For one goddamn second.
That's all I wanted.
"I'd like to speak to Rei. Alone." Michiru cut in, her voice icy. Anger was clearly simmering just below the surface. I couldn't bring myself to meet her gaze, I was unable to confront how quickly things had gone sideways. The morning had started off so well and now...
MICHIRU
I remained silent as I watched Haruka, Setsuna, and Hotaru file out of the kitchen, listening closely as they dispersed throughout the house – clearly finding other things to capture their interest. When I was sure that Rei and I were alone I took the seat next to her.
"They're gone, you can relax." I told her, letting every hint of anger leave my body – watching her start another downward spiral was not how I wanted today to go.
"You wanted to get rid of them that badly?" Rei asked, a faint smile gracing her lips as she realized I wasn't angry with her. I rolled my eyes.
"I find Haruka far more... pliant when she's trying to avoid a fight." I explained, reaching for Rei's hand. She took it without hesitation. "I thought you could use a break from the inquisition."
"Thank you." She breathed, weight clearly lifting from her shoulders.
"I do think we need to talk though." I told her, giving her hand a gentle reassuring squeeze. I didn't want to spook her.
"What about?" Rei's voice was measured but I knew there was an ember of apprehension in it.
"I avoided the topic last night, as well as on Christmas, but I think it's time we discussed it. I need to know what's going on with you." I continued calmly, trying to avoid making Rei feel pressured. I brought my free hand to her sternum, settling my palm above her heart. "I need to know what's going on here."
Rei's jaw clenched momentarily before she released the tension, letting out a deep breath.
"I suppose I promised, didn't I?"
"You did." I agreed before falling silent, letting her approach the topic at her leisure. For a few moments it was dead quiet between us as Rei gathered her thoughts.
"You asked me about the injury I sustained in the past and why it was growing." Rei started, I nodded knowing she wasn't actually looking for a reply. "The working theory right now is that it's nothing to worry about. The, for lack of a better word, infecti0n isn't going to hurt me. It's just something I'm going to have to live with."
"And what is it exactly?" I asked as calmly as possible, I didn't like the way Rei was so casual about this. This had killed her in the last world and I wasn't about to take any chances with it.
If Rei needed me at all I'd be there in a heart beat, for as long as she needed. Damn anyone who got in my way.
"I was talking to..." Rei's attempt at a reassuring tone stumbled on the next bit. "Well, um, Beryl. And she seems to think that I can control it -I have to some extent. It... it doesn't hurt exactly, not like it did anyway. It's just there."
I felt my eyes narrow, but remained silent. I didn't want Rei to have to deal with anything more than she already was. But I didn't trust Beryl.
I'd only met the woman twice – once when we were all convinced she was on the Moon to ask for our help, to beg for assistance with a problem we'd later found out was all an illusion. The second time was after she'd killed Rei and we'd been trying to find a way to incriminate her.
So no. I didn't trust her. But Rei seemed to.
And that just meant that I would have to keep an eye on my friend, watch her for any changes or problems she might encounter.
I needed to make sure my friend wasn't being manipulated or coerced into doing things she normally wouldn't. And I most definitely wouldn't allow Beryl to use her to her own ends. I wouldn't let Rei be taken advantage of like that.
I just wouldn't let her know I was keeping an eye on her. At least not like that. She was used to me being protective and concerned, so I'd hide behind that. Even I really I was watching for something more sinister.
"And you're sure it doesn't hurt?" I asked, meeting her eyes to watch for any hint of wavering.
Rei laughed.
"It doesn't hurt." She assured me and I watched her open her mouth to say more but clamped it shut again, as if second guessing what she had been about to share. I let it go – so long as it wasn't hurting she could keep the rest to herself.
"And you trust Beryl when she says she's not doing this to mess with you?
"She's not." Rei replied, the absolute certainty in her tone giving me pause. I let silence fall between us.
I would have to talk to Setsuna about this – some times it was hard to trust her knowing that she saw events differently than most. But Rei's fate and happiness was one area I was unwilling to compromise on, if Setsuna knew anything about Beryl's plans surrounding Rei I was going to make sure I knew as well.
It didn't matter to me that Rei wanted me to stay out of this and live a normal life. I was Rei's only family left and I wasn't going to let her down.
In all honestly, I didn't trust anyone with Rei's safety at this point, not even her, but I could at least act like I was going to keep out of it.
"Alright. So long as you're sure." I eventually agreed.
"Don't worry about me Michiru." Rei's eyes were fond, her hand coming up to brush against my cheek – the action so incredibly gentle.
"Just keep in touch, alright?" I requested, watching as Rei nodded in response. Then her expression quirked.
"Anything for you, princess." I rolled my eyes. Of course she'd make a joke out of this.
I leaned over and kissed her.
KUNZITE
I rubbed my hand back through my hair, staring down at the phone in my hand for what felt like the thousandth time that day. It was hardly past nine yet here I was – thinking about trying to reach Minako.
Again.
I let out a lengthy sigh before dialing her number for what must have been the twentieth time since she'd kicked me out of her apartment.
The phone rang through to her answering machine, clearly she hadn't blocked my number yet which I could only take as a good sign. Maybe there was a chance I could clear this up. At least some of it.
Guilt was eating me alive.
"Hey Minako, it's me again. Listen, I know I'm the last person you want to hear from right now but just... just call me back. Please?"
I took a shaky breath. It wasn't guilt over breaking up with her but rather guilt over essentially leaving Rei to clean up a mess of my creation.
"We need to talk this through, you and me, without dragging Rei into it. She's dealing with enough right now."
I knew this probably wasn't helping her suspicion of mine and Rei's involvement but I really couldn't think straight right now.
"Fuck. I'm not saying this right. Look, I'm sorry I lied about meeting Rei but it's our problem not hers, okay? So please call me back... or at least think about it?"
I swallowed nervously, debating whether or not to say goodbye when the message timed out. I tossed the phone down on to the couch as I swore, getting to my feet and pacing back and forth – resuming my pastime of wearing a hole in the hotel carpet.
"I remember being better at this whole talking to people thing." I muttered to myself. "I used to be charming – the hell happened?"
With a shake of my head I walked back over to the couch, grabbing my keys and phone before heading to the door. I needed to get out of here for a bit. Hopefully I'd be able to escape without the goddamn paparazzi hounding me.
I needed to go try and get at least part of my life sorted out, the time for focusing on the past was over, at least for a bit. It was time to look to the future.
It was time to go talk to Zoisite.
REI
I slipped into Gaslight without anyone noticing and made my way towards my office, stopping short with my hand on the doorknob. Something had kicked my instincts into high gear.
Someone was inside.
I steeled myself for any number of people I did not feel like talking to right now and pushed open the door.
"Didn't think you'd be in for a few hours yet." Ren commented, barely looking up from the laptop that she'd set on my desk. My whole body relaxed. It was just Ren. Her I could deal with.
"Didn't think anyone would even be here." I replied, shrugging off my coat and hanging it behind the door.
"The sales report for the month needed last nights earnings added in and I had to take inventory. Plus the cash flow statement..." She let her voice trail off, giving a vague wave of her hand.
I mumbled something that sounded vaguely understanding, I hadn't realized that she was taking all that on herself. When Ren picked up on the fact I wasn't going to continue the conversation, instead choosing to read her screen over her shoulder, she simply gave a sigh.
"Plus I wanted to be here to talk to you when you first got in." She admitted, her tone carefully modulated. It sent a small flicker of guilt and shame through me, I'd been a bit absent lately, chaotic and stressed, and it had certainly left the bulk of the responsibility on her shoulders. I'd put too much on her recently.
"Oh really?" I asked, a gently teasing tone entering my voice as I pushed off the back of her chair, coming to sit on top of my desk instead. Today we were both free and ran no risk of being interrupted, it would be nice to get our friendship back on level ground. Quite honestly, I missed her.
"Wow, you're in a good mood this morning. Last night must have ended well." Ren acknowledged, saving her work and shutting her laptop. I shrugged.
"Certainly relieved some stress." I agreed, keeping my tone light. The morning had been perfect. At least until I'd left Michiru's bed. Ren's cautious smile remained in place but took on a slight edge of wariness.
"I, uh, well, I wanted to see how you were doing. Or rather, well, what you were doing?" She started, picking at the sleeve of her sweater. I did a double take. Make that Kade's old college sweater – several sizes too big for her and beginning to fray in spots.
"Doing?" I asked, not entirely sure I was following the thread of the conversation. My stomach was starting to turn itself in knots at the potential topics though.
What was I doing about my father's company? What was I doing whenever I disappeared on her?
My heart stuttered in my chest. Did she think I was going to shut down Gaslight or at least stop my involvement with it? The mere thought of doing that made me feel sick. This place was my only lifeline to the real world.
"Doing about the paper?" She prompted, a less guarded look on her face. Then I realized that what I had taken for wariness was actually her trying to hide a smile. "Please tell me you're suing?"
This revelation left me even more blank than before.
"What?" I asked, amazed I'd even managed that level of coherency.
"Come on Rei, keep up. You and Kunzite? Talk about off base, I mean for one you're queerer than a three dollar bill..."
"I'm what?" I choked out before breaking out into laughter. How was it that Ren knew me this well when even some of my oldest friends probably hadn't figured it out? Ren was watching me with an amused smile on her face. Fond to be sure, but she was definitely finding some level of hilarity in this whole situation.
"I hate to be the one to tell you this Rei but everyone here knows. It's no secret." Ren explained with an air of exasperation as she curled up in her chair. "Honestly, the groupchat exploded when Annis first posted the article to it. Apparently..."
"There's a groupchat?" I asked dumbly, cutting her off as my brain was still kicking into gear. I knew I made no attempt a hiding who I was but I didn't think that my staff would have such a fascination with my love life... or lack thereof.
"Yes. Anyway, there's now a copy of the article pinned to the staff bulletin board."
I started to laugh, running a hand back through my hair. I was feeling lighter now than I had when I left Michiru's. Having someone treat the whole thing as a joke was oddly freeing. I pushed up off the desk.
"I'm going to go grab something to drink, you want anything?" I offered, letting my whole body relax... finally realizing how tense I'd gotten since leaving Michiru's arms.
"There's a pot of coffee on in the kitchen if you want some." Ren replied easily, looking rather satisfied with herself. Probably over the fact she'd made me laugh.
"Two cream, two sugar?" I prompted, taking a shot in the dark as I ducked out of the office toward the kitchens. Ren's voice echoed after me.
"Yes!" There was a slight pause before she continued. "And I know you were guessing and I'm never forgiving you for it."
I rolled my eyes, still chuckling as I prepared her coffee and my own mug of tea. Apparently for all that Ren had said she wasn't expecting me in for several hours yet, the kettle was warm, my mug was freshly washed, and set out. She knew I didn't drink much coffee and probably assumed, correctly, that I'd had some with Michiru.
I walked back with both our drinks and perched myself back on my desk, handing over her drink as I watched her fondly.
"Is there really a copy of that fucking article on the staff bulletin board? I didn't look." I questioned, keeping the conversation in lighter territory. I could tell that Ren actually wanted to ask me some serious questions but she was taking her time about it. For which I was grateful.
"No, but only because I'm taking it to get laminated. And you're paying for whiteboard pens so we can deface the photos. Think of it as a teambuilding exercise." She answered.
"Why are we friends? You're the worst..." I replied, taking a sip of my tea, still not entirely sure if she was joking or not. Maybe I'd pick up a pack of pens just in case.
"Anyway, as I was saying earlier, apparently there's some debate in the groupchat over whether or not you were threatening Kunzite."
"And what was your opinion?"
"Well, it wouldn't exactly be off brand, now would it?" Ren retorted. I gave a dry chuckle.
"No, I suppose not."
"So what are you going to do about it?" She asked.
"Nothing. Though I like the idea of suing, you think I could get A.E.D.'s lawyers on that?"
"That would be fun to see but I doubt it. And you're really not planning on doing anything? You're not going to go after her?"
"It's complicated." I replied, taking a rather large gulp of tea and hoping she wouldn't pursue it too much further. Ren snorted.
"Complicated. You got that right. You're lucky that no one managed to get pictures or video of you and Michiru last night."
I froze, I hadn't even thought of that. That was the last thing they needed, a media shitstorm around the family while they were trying to live a normal life.
"Don't worry about it. I had some words with the staff, I made it exceedingly clear I'd personally murder anyone who talked about your business with the media. Or allowed any of the guests in VIP to post it to social media." Ren explained, I raised an eyebrow.
"That's a little dark for you." I admitted after a moment or two.
"I learned from the best." Ren replied with fondness.
"Try to avoid picking up too many of my bad habits, alright? I need you to be the nice one, if you act too much like me I'll have no employees."
"Awwwww, Rei, we all love you."
"Stockholm syndrome, obviously." I drawled. Ren grinned at me.
"You wanting to get back to work?" She asked after a second, her tone still light and cheery.
"What you're all out of questions? I was expecting a proper interrogation." I prompted, it was as close as I'd get to admitting I was okay talking about it with her. Today at least. I was feeling good.
I suppose that was the whole thing with a new year, it gave you a bit of a chance to start fresh. Plus with her I could ignore everything else. There were no questions about the unnaturalness of the rest of my life. Here, with her, I could just pretend life was simple. Or simpler.
"Yep. All out. Mostly I just wanted to make sure you were doing okay with everything. The last few days have been a wild ride for you." She returned, bumping my knee with hers. I could tell she was waiting to see if there was anything urgent I wanted to talk about.
I shrugged, feeling a bit talked out where my father was concerned. Flashes of my conversation with Michiru the night before kept resurfacing. It had been a long time since I'd been that honest about my relationship with my father.
"Back to work then. I'll take cash flow if you finish up sales?" I offered, flipping open the laptop on my desk as Ren pulled out her own. After an hour or so of working in relative silence, exchanging basic comments and reminders, Ren spoke up again.
"Also, Kade and I might have ended up talking about work last night. He had some suggestions about the menu design. Something about the Golden Triangle? He thought maybe you might be able to boost food sales somehow."
"Is this really what passes for pillow talk in your house?" I asked with a roll of my eyes, mocking her without really meaning to. Ren flicked a paperclip in my direction.
"Shut up."
"It wasn't actually pillow talk was it?" I asked, a moment of pure joy flooding through me when she flushed.
"Oh my god Rei, shut up."
"I'm not one to judge, I mean, whatever floats your..." I continued, trailing off as she got to her feet.
"I'm leaving." She announced, clearly leaving just for dramatic effect. I waited until she'd exited the room before calling out. Just to be annoying.
"And Ren?" I asked, she poked her head back into the office.
"Thanks." I smiled. Thanks for giving me a place to be normal again – a safe place.
She smiled back, seeming to understand the words I didn't say, and disappeared into the club, clearly off to start taking inventory. For the last half hour she'd just been keeping me company in my office, letting me savour the peace I was feeling. The peace she'd brought me with her easy acceptance and good natured teasing.
It was good to feel that way again. Relaxed and at ease. Shame it never seemed to last long.
KUNZITE
"So, I see you've been busy." Zoisite commented when I plunked myself down on one of the stools by his work bench. He'd been a bit distant when he'd answered the door but he'd let me in. I missed the times when I could just waltz into his workshop and he wouldn't think twice about it. His only reaction would be a small smile that would nag at the corners of his mouth until I kissed him.
"Huh?" I asked, not entirely certain what he was talking about.
He jerked his head at the TV that was playing softly in one corner of the room. Surprisingly enough, it was tuned to an entertainment network where the hosts were discussing Minako, Rei, and I. I fought the urge to bury my face in my hands and groan.
"Didn't know this was your typical fare." I commented distractedly, trying to figure out how to address this whole thing with him.
I mean, I absolutely wasn't dating Rei, and Minako and I had broken up, so why was starting this conversation with him so hard? I loved him like I did no one else in this or any other world. But telling him that was another matter.
I finally understood what Rei had been fighting with all these years. I did not want to mess this up.
"And I didn't know cheating was yours." He replied in a voice that was trying so hard to be casual. I couldn't miss the glaringly obvious judgment in his tone though. I couldn't exactly blame him for it either. He didn't know the extenuating circumstances. And he wouldn't unless I explained it to him.
"Rei and I aren't seeing each other. That's just something the media cooked up." I told him, knowing I needed to remain calm and unaffected if I were to get through to him. He never was one to respond to overt or aggressive displays of emotion. Usually that would just shunt him back into a hyper logical frame of mind – totally immune to any conversation that wasn't about his work.
"Next you'll be telling me your break up with Minako was all a publicity stunt." Zoisite muttered. I leaned back against his work table, keeping my body language open and unaffected.
"It's starting to feel like the whole relationship was a publicity stunt. I wasn't nearly as invested in it as Minako was or as much as I thought I was. Seeing Rei again made me realize that." I told him, measuring each of my words carefully. The Zoisite I knew would forgive a certain level of white lie, I had to make sure I didn't cross that particular line with anything I said.
"If you try to sell me that 'we met at a publicity event' lie you fed everyone else I will..." Zoisite threatened, his voice just sounded bored though. He paused for a moment, seeming unable to come up with a proper ending to the threat.
"Personally feed me to one of your robots?" I asked, feeling incredibly more at ease post-threat than I had before it. "And don't worry. I wouldn't lie to you. Not ever."
I really hoped he believed that. The alternative wasn't something I wanted to consider.
"I... yeah." Zoisite agreed, seeming a bit caught off guard. He regrouped faster than I thought he would and resumed his investigation again. "So you're trying to tell me that you and Rei..."
"Saw each other for the first time in... well, a long time. Longer than we admitted. But Rei's not the reason I broke up with Minako. Or at least I didn't break up to be with her." I said, leaving my seat and approaching him. I rested an elbow on his work bench, trying to figure out what he was thinking.
Even after all the years I'd known him I still had trouble deciphering the intricacies of his mind. Probably because he existed on a level, or several, above me.
"The way I heard it, she broke up with you." He corrected with a bit of an eye roll, barely detectable, as he focused on his work.
"Semantics."
"You've always been good at manipulating an audience, Kunzite. And I've always enjoyed that...but what makes you think you can convince me with this bullshit you're trying to pull?"
I hesitated, my mind going blank. I couldn't exactly think of anything to say. No way to argue with him and make him believe this wasn't a ruse. No way to convince him I wasn't really who he thought I was.
I found myself cupping his cheek and leaning in for a kiss. Now that I was actually doing this, half of me was expecting him to punch me in the face. The other half was desperately hoping that some part of him would respond to my rather questionable advance and awaken.
Neither of those were what happened.
After our lips met he jerked back as though burned, turning bright red and beginning to stammer. I moved back, raising both my hands in a non threatening position. If he didn't want this, there was no way I was going to force it.
"But you... and..." He looked a bit sick to be honest. "Oh my gods..."
His word choice gave me pause, the Zoisite from this time had never been religious... but my Zoi had been. At least to some degree. He manipulated forces held by beings beyond our ken.
As I watched him, I could tell something was going on inside his head, he had that distracted look like he was processing more information than a human mind was ever supposed to. Finally he looked up at me.
I felt my eyes water a bit. There was no way it could be that simple. Why was this working?
Oh gods above, please let this work.
"Kunzite." He acknowledged softly, settling a hand on my arm. Then his face clouded and his hand withdrew. The first stirrings of anger washing across his form. "Fucking hell Kunzite, what have you dragged me into this time?"
"I... what?" I couldn't really find the words, I felt the urgent need to sit down before my legs gave out on me. I wanted off this emotional rollercoaster. Did he remember? Did he not?
"I thought we agreed after Arzachel that you'd leave me out of this shit – that I'd get to focus on my work." He stated, a more conversational tone entering his voice.
"You... you remember?" I asked hesitantly, logically I knew the answer, that was the only reason he'd bring up Arzachel, but I needed to hear him say it. I needed this to be real.
"Well, I do now. Still coming back to me but yes, I remember." He replied, seeming to have a much easier time with this than I had. The faster processing speed his brain ran at was probably responsible for that.
I couldn't help the tightness developing in my throat as I brought a hand up to rub at my watering eyes. I pinched at the bridge of my nose, trying to fight back the prickling sensation.
"Wait, dude, are... are you crying?" Zoisite asked, his voice going soft. I could hear movement, feeling him coming to stand behind me. His hand steady on my shoulder. I clenched my jaw, gritting my teeth together as I tried to steady myself.
"Rei thought... well, she didn't think you'd remember." I admitted. Zoisite's arms settled around me in a hug and I let my voice soften to a whisper. "So yes, I'm fucking crying."
"You're talking to Rei about us." He laughed. "I knew you were an idiot but I remember you having more tact..."
When I gave a shaky laugh and he pressed a kiss to my cheek.
"Yeah. Me too." I admitted.
We stayed there for a few minutes, just savouring the moment. Then with another brush of his lips he stepped back.
"So. Tell me about Rei." He suggested, returning to his own stool. I brushed a hand down the front of my shirt in an attempt to smooth out nonexistent wrinkles.
"There's a lot." I replied, knowing that Rei was one of the many topics I needed to approach with him. The other important one being Beryl and what was happening there. "What do you say we get out of here? Go for a drive or something?"
REI
I sat up straighter in my chair as voices filtered through the nearly empty bar. As I focused in on them I got to my feet, I recognized one of them. The other one I couldn't quite place though.
"And here I was thinking you were asking me out on a date. Not to go see your ex's ex."
There was a laugh, one that seemed all to familiar. But that couldn't be... because what the hell was Kunzite doing here?
As I stormed out of my office I nearly ran into Ren, who was wearing a concerned expression.
"So much for your good mood." She commented upon seeing my face. I grunted an agreement and slipped past her. There was no way he was staying here. This was my place and he needed to get the fuck out. I'd made one exception for Minako but that was all he got. Once.
All that left my mind when I stepped out on to the floor and saw who he was with. Kunzite was here holding hands with, Zoisite. I pulled up short, suddenly caught off guard by the fact they both looked... well, happy. Zoisite caught sight of me and raised a hand.
"Hey." He greeted. So casual. And so very aware of who I was.
I took a deep breath, trying to control the rage building up inside of me. Why did he remember when none of the others did? Why the fuck was this so easy for Kunzite and not me?
I clenched my teeth and approached the pair of them. Kunzite dropping Zoisite's hand when he saw my expression.
"You get a free pass this time asshole, but if you ever bring this shit to my place of work again I will rip you apart, got it?" I asked, the question coming out as a low growl as I jabbed him in the chest with a finger. Kunzite only hesitated for a second.
"I... yeah, understood."
"Upstairs. Now." I ordered, watching Zoisite's surprise as his companion began to obey without question. I turned around, pausing when I saw Ren watching me in concern. I let my stance soften.
"You think Kade would mind me swinging his place by while they're closed?" I asked, wanting to get Kunzite out of my sanctuary as fast as possible. "I don't think having him here is a good idea. All things considered."
"I'd say technically you're the owner and can do as you please." She told me, coming over and surprising me with a hug. "But I can call him and ask if you like?"
I gave her a squeeze with one arm before ducking behind the bar and grabbing a few glasses and a pitcher of beer. I set it on a tray and rested my hands on the bar needing a few seconds to collect myself. This was not something I'd expected to get blindsided with today.
"That would be great thanks." Was all I said in reply. Ren rubbed my shoulder consolingly.
"I'll take these up for you. Go take a minute for yourself – have a smoke." Ren encouraged, knowing that was exactly what I was craving in that moment. Then she gave me a gentle push in the direction of the fire door Michiru and I had left by the night before. I nodded, once again incredibly grateful for Ren's presence.
As the door fell shut behind me I let out a deep sigh, trying to figure out what the hell was going on here as I light my cigarette.
Part of me was conflicted, I knew that I'd been somewhat encouraging of Kunzite's desire to awaken some of the others. I hadn't known which one precisely but I figured it had to be one of his three comrades. I also hadn't expected it to actually work. I thought his efforts would go down in flames like mine had.
And they hadn't.
Maybe this was all just some bizarre form of punishment I'd accumulated through out my blood soaked past. Maybe I didn't deserve to be happy. Maybe my part in life was to watch the over the others and look after their emotional and physical well being.
I didn't see any other explanation, truth be told. I was the only one of the lot of us to be in any way unhappy with the direction our lives had taken in this world. Even Kunzite had been happy before I'd fucked that all up for him.
I groaned, leaning my head back against the cold brick wall behind me.
"This isn't happening." I said to the universe at large, doing my best to avoid a pleading tone. I flicked the last of my cigarette down into a growing puddle of slush and made my way indoors.
Ren caught my eye as I came back inside, falling into step next to me.
"Kade says give him a twenty minutes and the place is yours." She told me, I nodded. "You can stay here you know? Home field advantage and all that?"
"Honestly, I don't want this anywhere near my work. It's..." I found myself faltering, stumbling over what I wanted to say and what would avoid arousing suspicion.
"It's nothing personal." I ended lamely. Ren rubbed a hand across my back.
"It's okay to want privacy." She acknowledged, before promptly returning to the business at hand. "They're just about finished their drinks, then you guys can take off."
I gave a nod and walked up the stairs, embracing the seclusion of the VIP section. Zoisite watched me warily as I approached.
"Zoisite." I greeted stiffly as I sat down across from the couple, reaching for one of the empty glasses and pouring myself a glass of beer. I probably wouldn't finish it all but I needed something to do with my hands. Something to keep me from reaching across the table and throttling Kunzite. I knew enough of myself to admit I wasn't angry exactly, just jealous.
"So, what's the trick Kunzite?" I asked, trying to keep my tone light and nonthreatening. Kunzite gave a bit of a shrug.
"Honestly? I have no idea." He replied. "Honesty maybe?"
"Doesn't explain why you awoke when you saw me." I countered in a low voice, not believing that honesty shit for a second. Something had awoken him. And somehow he'd replicated that with Zoisite.
"You say that like the root cause, the trigger, has to be the same in both cases." Zoisite muttered, his tone skeptical.
"I've spent years, on and off, trying to get my friends to recognize me and the boytoy over here manages to do it in under a week."
"Maybe it's you?" Kunzite suggested. I looked away, my heart feeling loose in my chest.
"I had considered that." I admitted. Kunzite swore softly, realizing how I'd taken his words. Zoisite looked ready to laugh at the contrite expression on his partner's face.
"I don't mean that it's not happening because of you, I meant... the opposite actually. Maybe it's happening because of you?" Kunzite clarified.
"I find that hard to believe. If it was me you'd think someone else would have been affected before you."
"Then maybe it's not you, per se, maybe you're just the inciting incident." Zoisite posited. Kunzite nodded like they'd talked about this before and Zoisite was just better at articulating what he was thinking.
"I'm not seeing how that's different." I admitted.
"When I saw you that first time Rei, something... it felt like something crumbled. Like you'd inadvertently destroyed a barrier in my mind. Without meaning to. Just the mere fact you were looking at me with such... hatred. It got through to me." Kunzite explained.
"And here I thought I had a good poker face." I quipped, pushing my beer aside. If neither of them had any concrete theories I saw no reason to stick around. Their beers were empty and I wasn't inclined to refill them. "Anyway, I've got better things to do than hang around here. You two had best be on your way."
"Actually." Kunzite called as I started down the stairs, I paused and turned back to look at him. "I was hoping we could talk about our mutual friend."
Some sinking part of me knew he wasn't talking about Minako. He was probably trying to bring up the whole thing with Beryl.
I looked away, my brain tossing the thought of actually sitting down and seeing what their plan was now that they had a more complete team. Information was always important. And I did already ask Kade if we could use his place.
Against my better judgment, I pulled out my phone and texted them the address.
"I'll meet you there. If you get there before me just tell the owner I sent you... though he'll probably already know, what with everything that's been going on."
Without waiting for a reply I left the club, heading directly to my car as I lit another cigarette. I needed to take a drive, clear my head.
Shame the phone rang.
MINAKO
"Hello?" Rei's voice was calm and businesslike, momentarily making me feel guilty about using the studio phone which would only show up as 'Unknown Number'. With all she was going through right now, surely she deserved a warning? But I'd tried that and she hadn't answered the phone, she'd refused to even call me back when I left a message.
"Rei." I greeted as evenly as possible, reining in anything even remotely resembling doubt. I deserved answers and Rei was the only one I could rely on to give them to me.
"Minako." The way she said my name was soft, like she was trying to be gentle with the way her mouth formed the word. I was so lost in that I almost missed the way she let it trail off, so tentative and... yearning.
I shook my head, forcing myself to ignore all that. I couldn't afford to let myself read into anything. Not where she was concerned and certainly not when I was calling for answers. Her reaction had nothing to do with me and had everything to do with the other circumstances in her life.
"I know you two are lying to me." I stated, doing my best to keep my voice calm and even.
"What do you want from me, Minako?" Rei's voice asked, heavy with emotions I couldn't even begin to parse my way through.
"I want the truth, Rei. You'd know that if you talked to me or answered my calls." I was trying to bite back the anger in my voice but I was failing. My annoyance at Kunzite and the way Rei had hurt me leaking into my tone.
I didn't, not for a second, believe that Rei and Kunzite were seeing each other but Kunzite had lied about it. And Rei had gone to talk to him while ignoring or avoiding all her other friends. There was something going on between them and I needed to know what it was.
"The truth?" Rei questioned, obviously playing dumb.
"Yes, Rei. The truth about you and Kunzite." I all but snarled at her. Rei gave a heavy sigh.
"I don't know what you want me to tell you, Minako." She told me. "He and I had a drink and caught up. One drink, that's all."
She was intentionally being obstructionist.
"Ah yes, the woman who hates social interaction will go out for a drink when she won't even talk to her oldest friends." I muttered sarcastically. "Don't try and play me Rei, it's not cute. Or funny. And don't give me the crap story he tried – that you two just understand each other..."
"Minako." Rei's was soft again, like she'd come to a decision. I stopped myself from starting my next sentence, knowing she was finally about to answer my question. "We knew each other."
"I was never arguing that, you were both very clear on when you met..." My voice trailed off, it was only just striking me now that their stories were too similar and yet so vague as to be meaningless. Were they lying about that? Were they lying about how they actually met?
Maybe they were involved and that whole thing was their cover story. They'd both been a bit skittish about something the night of the party come to think about it.
Rei cleared her throat, cutting through my thoughts.
"No, you don't get it, Minako. We knew each other before. In...in the old world." Rei let her answer die after that, just letting it hang between us like she was expecting something.
My brain stuttered to a halt. Out of all the places I thought Rei could be going, this was not one of them. My mouth on the other hand was quick to jump forward with the truth.
"You don't remember the past, we all know that." I found myself arguing. "And Kunzite was never there, Rei."
Something akin to dread was starting to fill me, nagging at the back of my mind. Something was very wrong here. This wasn't right, it wasn't supposed to be like this...
"Yes, he was. He was there with Beryl." Rei argued back, frustration was heavy in her words.
"That is not what happened." My reply came out quick and adamant as ice began to sink through my veins.
"Beryl." I stated as my brain caught up to what the rest of me already knew. My voice went hard at the mention of her name... and the gentle stirring at the back of my brain stopped as I suddenly understood what was going on. "Rei, did you run into someone of that name?"
"Minako..." Rei's voice was suddenly tired.
"No. Rei. You need to listen to me, have you seen Beryl?" I was trying to keep the frantic concern out of my voice. Hand to god, if Beryl had done anything to Rei I would...
"No, she's... She's not messing with my head. I'm telling you the truth." Rei's tone took on a pleading edge, even as her emotions were flared...primarily in shades of hurt and hostility.
"You and I need to meet up. Now. As soon as possible." I ordered, the first hints of panic starting to lace across my rib cage, tightening its grip.
"I'm busy." Rei gritted out before hanging up the phone.
I let my head sink into my hands, wondering what to do next. Part of me wanted get everyone together right now. And finally, finally, admit what I'd always known deep down. That Ami was right.
Rei had come back wrong.
Or, as I now knew, she'd been tampered with. Beryl had done something to her and her memories and we needed to help Rei. We needed to make sure she was okay.
But the rest of me hesitated, I knew how quickly things could get out of hand. I'd seen Mamoru's concern over Rei's mental state before. How would he react, how would the others react, when it came out that Rei had been influenced by our enemy?
I needed to protect her, from how the others could react... and more importantly from herself. I picked up the phone again and redialed Rei's number. Only for it to go to voicemail.
Over and over again.
AN: There's no excuse. My bad.
