Humid

Is an interesting anonymous comparison. Her body felt light, as if were floating, but at the same time, her eyelids felt heavy like the biggest rock in a lake. Strange, even light, she couldn't move any muscle, maybe was so light because doesn't feel it anymore. Like as slept soundly on her arm, for longer than he could bear, the pain mistaken for a funny tingling and the non-immediate response of the limbs, going from discomfort to absolute absence. The fear of impotence usually accompanies absolute absence, it hurts more than sleeping on one arm. Did HE feel impotence in the face of the absolute absence of his arm? No, he would never feel impotence. He also never complained about her sleeping on her arm, not even once.

Perhaps it was a free fall. It seems when she fell from the top of an abyss. Not once, not twice, in fact, more times than she would like to admit. Feel it as the wind strokes your skin. The frightening tension of the wind cutting through her body like razors, which would end with a not soft impact, at the end of the chasm. Fortunately, he always reached her before half the fall. No matter what he was doing, who he fought with or how far he was, her safety was more important every time, when she was just a bare-footed girl used as a distraction or as an adult, in an oversight.

Misjudged an old bridge, the ropes were broken almost at the end of her crossing. The reflection of despair made her stick the blade of the dagger in a crease of rotten wood. Hanging, her body seemed to weigh more than a rock. There was pride that day, instead of being carried, she saw an arm with pale skin and singular marks appearing from the top of the stone wall. An offer of help, that like everything he offered her, she could choose to have or not. She held him tight. Now an adult, she could defend herself and survive alone in many situations, but she knew that he would always be willing to offer all the help she wanted. That day, they went to the river, she cleaned the scrapes and bruises on her arms and legs. She smiled mischievously when she realized that he was, somehow, mesmerized by his large amount of exposed and moist skin.

She could feel the moisture now. Maybe she was sleeping and sinking in the water, in a dream, by the lake. Sensation of humidity was common, she could be suffocating and excruciating on a summer afternoon during her chores. Or by pouring hot tea into her hands. Or the opportune (and in a way, also torturous) humidity that came in the late afternoon or evening, in private moments, when the husband dragged his hands under the fabric of her clothes. Or the humidity of the air and the bodies, intimately united, in a visit to an onsen, a sensation of extreme heat in the middle of such a cold winter.

But what she felt now was neither bad nor pleasant, it was like sinking into an ethereal lake, being able to breathe perfectly, but unable to move. Like walking (or screaming) in a dream, where you try and fail, run and doesn't move. Sinking in water seems to make a lot of sense, sometimes you can hear unrecognizable voices and words, or the ghost of a melody, muffled like at the bottom of a frozen lake. But, strangely, she could smell the forest, like in the days of bare trees, could smell grass, leaves and roots. In her mind, something connected roots and the figure of her husband, for some reason. Roots tearing the love in him apart.

All needs is to remember. What brought she to a confused place? She concentrated on listening to the melody. It seemed far away and sad, but soothing, like a lullaby. There was something familiar about the idea of rock a child, maybe two. She now remembered singing a song, trying to calm a child's crying while trying to control the tears in her own eyes. She remembered to run her hands through the child's hair and shoulders, they were soaked. But there were two, where was the other one? Why, that night, did she look so desperate for water?

Again, it was like walking in a dream, alone and inside the void. Her head ached with punctured information, there was a fire. So she needed water, but it was impossible to put out the flames. The water was to protect something. Did she succeed or fail? One child was wet, but what about the other? She knew there were two. Her head seemed to explode, getting lost among millions of information that came in disarray. It seemed to float. Did she jump into a lake? No! It smells like firewood, fresh wood. Within her empty dream she was able to move, fell on her knees holding her head and forced her eyes closed, she wanted to remember, but it was too painful. Voices, screams and cries ran through her mind in agony, she just wanted it to stop.

The sound of her name stood out among the noises. It was repeated a few times, getting closer and more demanding. Dared to open her eyes, and just like that time on the cliff, she saw the pale arm offer help. She held it with the same confidence, even with the sharp pain of the claws almost breaking his skin, it seemed like the despair of those who achieved what they had long since lost. Was pulled, body and soul, out of the ether. Became aware of her body again when crashed into Sesshoumaru's broken armor. He wrapped his arms around her in an urgent hug. Rin blinked a few times getting used to his own movements, the silk of his clothes was stained with blood, dry in some places and fresh in others. She allowed herself to be held in the embrace as long as he needed. His long fingers tangled in the dark strands behind her head. Over his shoulder, she saw two female figures, one helping the other to stand with an outstretched arm. More broken armor and stained clothes. Things made more sense now. She used a hand to get away from her husband's grip. With her fingers, she searched his face between the white strands. She smiled with happiness, sadness and pain, when she felt the moisture seeping near the magenta marks. Leaned head on his chest again, she didn't want to know if it was blood or tears.

E/N : Yes, I think those bare feet running through the fire at Yasha Hime's opening are from Rin. I also think that she and Sesshoumaru tried to save the girls, but only found Setsuna.

Thank you so much for reading, see you around 3