Chapter 26 / Isolate

February 12th, 2012 / Daytime
Ski Slopes

At first light I had left the room as quietly as possible to avoid waking any of the guys. Then I had gotten into my ski gear and hit the slopes without bothering with breakfast and staying away from the rest of the Investigation Team. Although I knew I was being childish with my behavior. I couldn't help myself this time because it just made me unreasonably angry seeing their expressions. I needed to cool my head and think about the whole situation a bit more. All I had wanted to do las night was tell them I felt uneasy about the current state of things. That I knew that we were far from over when it came to fighting Shadows. It wasn't like I had proof about this, solid proof anyway. But there was so many facts that led to me thinking that. For one, our Personae kept evolving. Unlocking new power and abilities beyond solving the murders. The TV world still existed and it could be used again for a crime. And also, how did anyone gain the ability to go in the TV to begin with? Where did Persona even come from? No, there was too much we didn't know.

I had let it slip, in my frustration, a detail that I learned from Miyuki while I had been a prisoner within my own mind. That the actions that they all had potentially taken, that if they had killed Namatame, they would have essentially killed me as well. It was useless to think about. The only reason I had said it was because of the implications that went with that fact. That someone was capable of directly changing someones fate, by linking it to the actions of others. Actions that were seemingly unrelated to the other. No, Rise had to take it the other direction. Still it wasn't like I didn't understand. No, I could see the leap in logic. That she had nearly been the one to end my life. Just the thought of her considering that made my temper flare up. And now, what was supposed to be a nice quiet and enjoyable getaway had been ruined because I had to open my damn mouth. Now I was avoiding my friends and acting like an idiot. And even if I'm aware of what I'm doing, I'm too much of a coward to try and change it.

Now what? Was I supposed to be the one that apologized in this situation? I don't believe I was wrong about being angry about it. I could apologize for storming off like a child though. It still didn't change how I felt about the whole thing though. I refused to let that thought of what could have happen, fester in her mind. That time had passed and I knew that because of their experience that the entire Investigation Team would think twice before jumping to conclusions like that again. Then again, maybe their reaction was because they were thinking about the implications of what had happened. And the ones most willing to do so at the time had apparently not been just Rise, but Yosuke, Kanji had been on board for the plan. I barely knew them, and yet they had cared so much for me. They had risked their lives to save me, just as I had risked mine to save Nanako. Only to die? Yeah it wasn't like I didn't understand that feeling. But they hadn't gotten revenge, thanks to Yu being a voice of reason. Although he himself told me the thought had lingered in his mind too.

I sighed. Perhaps, I was the one jumping to conclusions? In the end I decided to stop my useless conjecture and headed back to the top of the slope for another run down. I enjoyed the lift ride up. Something about the brisk cold air and the somewhat dizzying heights cleared my head. And having some time in solitude had made me a bit calmer. Despite how comforting it was to have Rise by my side, I also needed time away from her. This time I'd take the steeper slope. Or that was the plan at any rate. Naturally it wasn't like I could go the whole day without running into the Investigation Team at some point. It was the only other couple among the group.

"Senpai!" I heard a call from behind me before I went to take off. I turned to see Yu and Yukiko approaching. If it was going to be anyone other than Rise, it seemed natural for it to be them.

"Looks like you've been hitting the slopes pretty hard this morning," Yukiko seemed impressed by this fact. Or jealous? Actually its hard to tell with her because she's so competitive at times. I'm pretty sure right now she was thinking she could do it too. Though honestly my stamina on this front was fueled by me not wanting to see Rise at the moment.

"Senpai, Rise-san was looking for you," Yu added. Naturally he would bring this up.

"I'm sure she is," I pulled down my goggles onto my eyes. I turned back towards the steep slope. "I'm sure you all were. Think what you want, but I just don't want to see that look in Rise's eyes. She should have never known. No, none of you should have ever known about it. All I did was add something for us to worry about, when Marie-san is already missing. It's my fault anyway. I didn't trust myself to be able to handle the reaction you guys would have. So I did what I always do. I ran, like a fucking coward. Just like I always have, even though I said I was going to fight head on. Still, I just run away. So please, just leave me alone for now." Without looking back I took off and down the steep slope. I knew that both Yu and Yukiko were more than capable of keeping up with me. So if they wanted to, they could have chased me. But they didn't. When I got to the bottom, I stopped and looked up and saw that they hadn't followed.

What had I been hoping for? For them to come after me? I started moving again. I mean, this is what I wanted right? Solitude. That's how it always was in my life when I couldn't deal with anything. Rather, I just didn't care about the connection with others. I never thought there had been a point in it. How more idiotic could I be? All I was doing was reverting back to how I acted before. I knew I was just frustrated and I didn't know what I should do. Seeing that look in Rise's eyes, I never wanted to see that again. That was ultimately selfish of me. Too much of this was me acting like a spoiled brat. I'm such an idiot.

The next few hours I spent on my own. I would occasionally see the others around. Kanji was with Naoto and still teaching her, and she seemed to be retaining a bit more of it. Chie and Yosuke were basically inseparable as they were sticking to the same slope they had yesterday and generally were all smiles whenever I saw them. I'm sure Rise would eat that up if she saw the two of them together. Yukiko and Yu had been racing each other and Teddie, well, he seemed to be going between all of them. I guess I could tell that all of them were having a lot of fun. Yet in the hours I had been out here, not once did I see Rise with any of them. Even when I stopped back at the lodge for a snack had she been there. I had dismissed it. I could only assume she was doing something somewhere and I had simply missed her the whole day. Maybe she was avoiding me just as much as I was avoiding her. Now I was somewhat panicking. She didn't go home did she?

I didn't come back until I overheard that a snow storm was coming our way. I must have been one of the last back because I was greeted by Yu at the door.

"Senpai? Where's Rise-san?" He looked concerned. Wait, where's Rise? Was something wrong? Was she not here even though the snow storm was about to start?

"No, should I have?" I asked seeing that the others were there too. I was also trying not to make it appear how worried I was that Rise wasn't here.

"She just left to go look for you," Yukiko provided. My mind froze up on those words. "She was worried you'd get caught in the storm."

Despite how I had treated her last night and avoiding her all day, she had gone out to find me when she knew the storm was coming. "I'll go get her, she couldn't have gotten that far," I quickly turned and made my way back out as I saw how much darker it had gotten over the last few minutes. I didn't wait to see what the others would do. My mind became focused entirely on finding Rise. I could only really think of one spot she would go to try and find me. That was the place at the bottom of the slope that Rise and I had spent a lot of time just talking yesterday. If she got hurt because of my stupidity, because I was so damn selfish. I would never forgive myself. I quickly got back onto my ski's and headed out. It wasn't long before I got there. Visibility had gotten really bad now it was snowing incredibly hard. I could hardly see more than a few feet in front of me. Another thought crept into my head.

How was I going to find her out here? Any calm I had was slowly giving way to panic.

"RISE!" I screamed out. Nothing was said back, but the wind was picking up and it would be hard to hear anything at this rate. I moved to the side towards the edge of the lined out area for the public when something had caught my eye. My mind raced as I looked to see part of the fence had been knocked over. The fence was there because there was a steep drop along that edge. I looked down over to it and saw at the bottom of the short decline, a clean path through the snow led to a figure, laying collapsed and motionless. And I instantly recognized the color of the jacket. "RISE!" I popped off my ski's and jumped down, sliding down to where Rise was without regard to anything else. I turned her over and pulled her up to take a look at her. "Hey, you okay? Rise?" I pulled off my gloves and pressed it to her forehead. I needed to get her out of here.

She groaned as I helped her up. That was a good sign at the very least. "Kayane? I was supposed to be finding you...I just screwed up and ended up down here though." She wasn't happy about that fact, but we could talk about that later. Her voice wasn't as strong as it should be. How long had she actually been looking for me? I didn't even stop to ask Yu and Yukiko how long it had been. If she had been at the lodge then likely she would have been able to tell the others about the storm long before it happened.

"Come on, we need to move. The storm is going to get worse. We should be able to head back if we go this way," I said and urged her to move, which thankfully didn't take much. I doubt she was any shape to fight me. Besides wasn't I the only one that was doing the fighting anyway? I'm so selfish, and because of that Rise might be hurt because of me. But she held onto me and at a glance it looked like she hadn't been fully prepared to go out to search for me. Likely she had decided to stay at the lodge all day and never planned to go out. That was my fault. Then I worried her by disappearing on everyone, so nobody knew where I was. Damn it. I focused on keeping her moving, if I didn't she was likely only going to get colder.

"How are we supposed to get back to the lodge? I can't see anything," Rise had to almost yell just so I could hear her. The wind had picked up significantly more now. There would be no point in attempting to get back like this, regardless of how close to the lodge we might be. I needed to get her out of this.

"Just keep moving!" I yelled back and pressed her forward. It had probably been a full ten minutes or longer before I couldn't tell where we were. However, I did see something. It would have to do for now. I pulled her inside what seemed to be a small cottage and closed the door behind us.

"K-k-kayane...w-w-w-where are w-w-we?" Rise's teeth were chattering. She needed to be warmed up, as soon as possible.

There was a fire pit, I could use that. There was enough supplies in here that it was easy enough to stack wood and start a fire. It took a couple minutes but not long after I had situated everything I had the fire going. I went over and brought her next to the fire. "Do you still have feeling in your feet?" I launched into over a dozen questions making sure she hadn't started getting frost bite. It shouldn't have been that bad, I doubt she had been looking for me for too long. Still, she didn't have everything on that she had when she had gone skiing yesterday, which definitely meant she was under dressed. Likely, concerned over me, not knowing where I was had caused her to charge head first into the coming storm to find me and bring me back. After all she hadn't seen me all day, because of me. She might have assumed I may go as far as not come back to the lodge in my usual stubbornness. After some time I could see the color coming back in her cheeks and she was no longer chattering her teeth from the cold. I sat next to her, wallowing in my own guilt over this.

We sat in silence for a long time. Only the sound of the wind against the cottage could be hear, along with the sound of the fire in front of us. Rise was the one to break the silence after she clearly was feeling more like herself. She shifted uncomfortably for a moment, "I know your still mad at me. For lingering on that thought for so long."

"I'm not mad," I shook my head. Not at her anyway. At myself? Well I think I am always mad at myself, about how I have said so much before hat I don't really care, but the truth was I was just incredibly selfish. I pushed others aways due to fear of getting hurt. And I lash out when I become afraid of things changing. When I had seen Rise's eyes and how she thought about what I had revealed, I panicked and I became afraid. So I pushed away the things that could hurt me, and that was Rise. "I had no real reason to be mad at you. I was just being selfish and because I didn't know how to handle it."

She looked at me, "Because you didn't want me to think about it."

"I didn't want to see you feel guilty when you had nothing to feel guilty about. Remember how you felt when I told you I had attempted suicide?" I figured it was the best equivalent that I could come to at the current moment. On top of this though it was because I didn't understand up to this point how it felt on the other side. I had always been the one being hurt, on the receiving end. Now all of this was new. I was inexperienced, and I had hurt Rise as a result.

"Yes," she said quietly, likely thinking about the time at my place when I had admitted to attempting suicide. "I was mad but it wasn't really at you." I could see as the realization crossed her eyes on what I had meant. She quietly took my hand. "I was mad because even though it was impossible for me to do anything, I felt I should have been able to stop you somehow. No that isn't it, that maybe I could have supported you in some way. It was really just me being frustrated. I mean how could it be anything else? It isn't like I could go back in time and change it."

She didn't know, how could she? I kept a lot of things to myself, more than I should She was my girlfriend after all. I wanted to share with her everything, and I needed to take better strides at doing just that. I sighed trying to ease my own mind and the guilt I felt about what had led to this situation, "You silly girl. I thought you would have figured it out what happened next. After I had attempted suicide there was something that happened. Something I was introduced to." She looked confused at me. I suppose I really hadn't laid out a time line on exactly how it had happened.

"I know what it's like to struggle," I started to sing from a song she would know very well.
"I know what it's like to give up
But I know you're stronger
And I know you can pull through
I'll be here singing your support.
Just look up to the sky
And I'll be shining down.
"

Rise sang softly with me, "And I will be Star Bright
So that I can light up the night
And when you look to the sky
I can lift you up
And together we'll be Star Bright
"

I smiled at her as she stared at me as she processed what it all meant. "You heard Star Bright. After your suicide attempt?" Rise asked.

"Yeah, at a time I was probably more lost then I had ever been in my life before. Or it felt that way at the time. I didn't know anything about what I wanted in life. I had no idea how to keep living day to day. I mean I had tried to commit suicide, I though it was the better option than not knowing what to do. I didn't think anyone would miss me. After all of it, I knew I had been wrong. Mom needed me, I just needed to figure out the best way for me to keep living. I wanted to find a reason so I wouldn't worry her anymore, but it was hard. Then Mom just came to me only about a week after I was out of the hospital and asked me to review a song for her. Never gave me an option to refuse her, and at that time I wouldn't have refused her anyway. At the very least I would do all I could for her. So I took it put on my headphones and that's when I heard your voice for the first time. I listened to that song over and over that night until I memorized the lyrics. It felt like those words and your voice was everything I had ever needed," I brought her hand to my lips and kissed the back of it. "You've supported me every day since. But that isn't why I brought this up."

"I know," Rise said softly, she was smiling and looking at our hands as I was holding hers. "You didn't want to see me make that expression. But you have to know why I did. It didn't have anything to do with the fact that it didn't happen. The mere possibility is terrifying to me. Kayane, I love you. And I also understand why you wouldn't tell me that. And honestly, I'm okay with it, me knowing doesn't change anything. But even if it was unintended for me to hear it, I did. So my mind went into overdrive and re-imagined exactly how different that whole scene could have gone. You didn't see how angry I was then when we stood in front of Namatame. I went and stopped your Mother but with every intention of doing it in her place. I wouldn't let your Mom become a killer because I wanted to be the one to do it. I didn't care about my future, all I cared about was revenge and the future that I felt had been taken away from me. It was the first time in my life I had ever felt so angry and so lost. I thought I knew how that felt before when I left being an Idol. I felt lost and didn't know who I was. This was different. I know who I am, but it was like I couldn't be me if you weren't there. I felt like I had lost my anchor and I had been doomed to drift in a endless ocean. And ocean that I didn't care if the waves consumed me. All I could think about was how I had finally found you, only to lose you. Maybe I shouldn't feel so deeply for you back then, but it was genuinely how I felt."

"Found me?" I was torn at her words. I wasn't sure I wanted to see her that angry, even if it was for my sake. "Wait, why me?"

Rise started again with a different point, "I love my friends. Narukami Yu, Satonaka Chie, Amagi Yukiko, Hanamura Yosuke, Tatsumi Kanji, Shirogane Naoto, Nanako-chan and Teddie. They've all become irreplaceable to me in my heart. They rescued me, brought me back from that place in the TV World and saved me from my own destructive thoughts. You were immediately different than all of them when you came into my life. You manage to see straight through me, even when you barely knew me. You know when I'm putting up a front, and you know when I'm not quite myself. Maybe it doesn't seem that way to you. But its the truth. I mean you didn't even know who I was when you saw me, and that really threw me off, you know?" She gave a light giggle as she looked up into my eyes. "Maybe its because you never saw me as Risette. So immediately it felt different just interacting with you. You never treated me differently than anyone else, even after it was pointed out to you who I was. And even though you were a fan of mine, you cared more about my music. And even more about me, as a person. I wasn't an Idol to you, I was just Rise. Still, it is so much more than even that. You have no problems getting angry at me. You aren't afraid to stand up to me or tell me how you feel. At least when it comes to me. You also don't try to impress me. Actively anyway, you impress me without having to do anything but be yourself. The one you are always trying to hide from the world. But believe it or not, I see it. When you're playing the piano when you think no one is around. The way you match your steps up with mine as we're walking with the others. How you always take an extra moment to make sure I'm close by." She seemed so happy about all of that. "Most of all I love just watching you."

"Well, I try to impress you now. But I was scared of you for a while. Scared of myself really," I shook my head. My life had changed drastically from the moment I had been kidnapped and put into the TV. Sometimes I feel like there has never been enough time to catch up on how things had changed. That first month with them had been very important to me. And also why I was afraid that Rise and I were moving too quickly. "I only looked so closely at you because I wanted to understand you. When we first met, you were crying. I didn't get it at the time. I didn't understand how anyone, especially someone who had never met me would cry for me. Especially because I felt I never deserved it. Honestly, even after everything we've been through up to now. I still don't feel like I deserve to be with you. To be this close to you. That's why it scares me so much. It's why I'm such a coward and I just run away when we come against a problem. Instead of facing you, knowing how you were going to react frightened me. I knew you acted that way because of how you feel for me. And I know that I stormed off because I just wanted to protect myself. So, I'm sorry. I got scared and because of that, I hurt you."

Rise grinned and then suddenly moved and kissed me. It surprised me for a moment before I found myself kissing her back. After a moment she pulled back and rested her forehead against mine, her eyes looking right into mine. "Listen to me, Kayane. I give you complete and utter permission to be possessive over me. I want you to have expectations of me. I want you to know that I am yours. So if you need to go off and cool your head thats fine. I want you to get angry at me, but I'm not going to let you run away from me for long. I'll go after you so we can talk just like this. Please, yell at me, scream at me. Do whatever you have to because I know underneath all of those emotions you show on the outside is what you're really feeling. It's always there, buried in your heart. I know you and I know it takes you a while to express yourself and what you are truly feeling. I can wait. I can be patient. Well, within reason. What is important for both of us, Kayane is that we can fully express ourselves and then when all of that energy is gone we can sit down, together and have a heart to heart about the truth. But every step from the beginning to the end is important. We're both new to relationships and we are both going to screw up along the way, right? And we're allowed to make mistakes. We're human after all."

I was looking into her eyes, her beautiful brown eyes that I could never look at enough. I knew what she was asking. Do what I needed but don't run away. And don't be afraid to express my frustrations and anger at her. She wanted honesty, no it was more simple than even that. She wanted me to just be me and not protect her from a side that I may see as ugly, or undesirable. Then I realized what my real problem really was. It was something I had just done and never really thought about before, and unconsciously I had been doing again, only with Rise. And no, that was not something I could find as acceptable. So I told her what the truth was, "I spent my life telling people what they wanted to hear. I didn't want to talk to the councilors or psychologist, or therapist. I never wanted to tell them how I felt because it just didn't seem like it mattered. All it felt was like I was being forced to remember everything over and over again for years. So I got into a habit of telling them what they wanted to hear. I mean it took some time but I saw them so often that eventually they had deemed me to have gotten over all of it. In truth I had just told a lie so they would leave me alone. I guess I might have been falling into that same trap. I didn't see a point in telling you about all of that but the truth was I was just doing that so I wouldn't have to talk about it or think about it. I was making it easier for me, not for you. Running away, avoiding saying my true feelings out loud. You would think that after what we've been through with all of you, I would be more willing to just speak my mind."

"It's like you said before. We constantly have to face ourselves, right? Nothing is perfect over night. And I think we both have a lot to learn and growing yet to do. But, I'm determined to make sure we always communicate. Even if it means us getting into shouting matches sometimes and we both have to walk away angry. As long as we can go back and talk about it later and work through it. That is what is most important to me," Rise said in a hushed voice before capturing my lips again in a kiss. This wasn't something we hadn't talked about before though. But it had been more in passing and hadn't gotten to why we felt that way. Now it was clear how Rise felt and how important it was for her. I think this made it more than clear how we both felt about it. She was definitely right about this. We were in a relationship that was new to both of us and something that neither of us had experience in being part of. It was likely we would both make mistakes, and we would come to a time where we would argue. This was something that came with the territory of being in a relationship. We both needed to keep in mind that this kind of thing was going to happen from time to time, we just needed to make sure when it did, and after things cooled down that we would be able to calmly talk about it after.

She pulled away after a long moment, her lips not nearly as cold now as they had been, and she looked just like her usual self. The fire seemed to do the trick. Though I'm not convinced it was just the fire that was helping her now. "I don't like being angry," I said after a moment and looking to the fire. "Every time I get angry it feels like I could do something, something like him." I admitted, not only to Rise, but to myself. The thought had suddenly sprang to my mind as I was speaking. And now that I had said it, that must be the main reason I run off when I get frustrated.

Rise then took a moment to straddle me, which completely confused me for a moment. She took a hold to both sides of my face. "Let me make this perfectly clear to you, Ikakure Kayane. You will never, and I mean never be like your Uncle. Do you understand? That isn't you, it can never be you. I know your afraid, and I know it is by and large a major reason why when you get frustrated you leave the room. It's also why I don't follow you. Let me show you something." She unzipped the front of her coat and then took my hand and placed it to her heart against her chest. I could easily feel how her heart was racing. She brought her forehead against mine so that our eyes were connected once more. "This heart that is beating underneath your hand belongs to you. And there is no one else in this world that I trust more than you. And I know that you would never, never, do anything like that man. I trust you, with all of my heart and every part of my soul." She claimed my lips again and led my arm around her on the inside of her jacket as she pushed the kiss deeper. It was hard not to be swept up in the wave of emotions.

She was right. I would never do something to hurt her. I would never do something like that, so why was I so afraid? I wrapped my arm around her, underneath her coat, only a couple layers between my hand and her bare skin. Rise ran her hand to my jacket and unzipped it, then putting her hands on my chest of my shirt and then ran her hand down along the edges of my shirt, slowly lifting one side to put her hand along my bare skin. Her hand was colder than I expected so I reacted for a moment but she didn't pull back. She reached with her other hand to mine and began guiding it to the edge of her own shirt.

The door to the cottage suddenly opened. "Senpai! ...oh!" Yosuke was the first one I heard. I broke the kiss suddenly and turned to see the majority of the Investigation Team standing in the doorway. I started to retract my hand but Rise took hold and instead pulled herself closer to me, her hand under my shirt and along my back.

Rise giggled but stayed close to me, from their angle they would have no clue where her other hand was, "Oh my, you guys are sure bold just charging in. If you had been any later you might have seen something a little more risqué." I had a feeling that she was incredibly frustrated that they had found us. I knew it just based on how heart was pounding against me. She wanted to keep going.

"Rise! Shouldn't you be...I dunno...more reserved about this kind of thing?" Chie was definitely alarmed as to what Rise was implying. And she had no idea that Rise was still taking this opportunity to run her hand along my back.

"Why? You guys could be more considerate and came back in like an hour, maybe two?" Rise was grinning looking back at me. I noticed Chie and Naoto were turning red but Yukiko laughed instead.

I just sighed, the mood had certainly been good and emotions had been high, but the Investigation Team showing up acted like a bucket of cold water. Plus there were a lot of reasons why we shouldn't get too physically intimate like that, "You're far off from getting anything from me."

Rise just looked back at me somewhat shocked and frowning. She took a moment and noticed something else, that my arm was shaking. Rise pulled her hand out from underneath my shirt and pushed herself back a bit. However not wanting to give the Investigation Team any hints as to what was happening she used the most disappointed sounding voice she could make as she spoke again. "But Kayane!" It sounded like I was her parent who told her she had to finish eating her vegetables before she got desert. Well maybe that was too apt of a comparison. She knew I would play along at this point as she was smiling big.

"Anyway," I said looking to the others. "We're fine. I just wanted to get her out of the cold. And it hadn't been the best of ideas for me to try and get her back to the lodge as I couldn't see anything."

"Well you found her, that's good at least," Yu relaxed and came in. Rise pouted a bit as she had been ignored but she was satisfied because she was still straddling my lap even with the Investigation Team there. "We got worried when you didn't come back."

"Like I said, couldn't see a thing in the storm and Rise was ice cold so I just took her in to the first shelter I saw. Luckily there was enough in here for me to start a fire and" I was explaining when I heard a sound. I turned my head to see a TV?

"Did the TV just turn itself on?" Kanji said as they all came further into the room. Rise shifted in my lap so she could see what he was talking about.

"So? Maybe the wiring's bad or something. Or you saw some light reflected in it..." Chie tried to explain it away. Naoto took a step forward and past Rise and I to get a closer look.

"From the looks of it, this TV isn't even plugged in. But it definitely appears to be on," Naoto said in front of it. She took a closer look at it. Then something happened. The rest of the Investigation Team was getting closer to take a look as Rise and I were finally getting to our feet. And then from the edge of my view something reached out of the TV and grabbed Naoto, pulling her towards it.

It happened insanely quickly. Kanji grabbed Naoto. And then the others all grabbed Kanji and tried to pull her back. Except it all pulled them instead. Rise and I rushed over to help but instead we all got pulled into the television. Then that familiar feeling of falling into the TV happened, but this time I was holding on to Rise. The world around me was surrounded in light. And then I was on the ground. It took a moment before I recovered my vision. Rise was there to help me to my feet.

"What happened? One second we're looking at a TV and then..." I muttered and stopped when I finally started taking in the surroundings. I looked around finally and found that we were surrounded by...statues? No these were familiar. "Haniwa?" Yeah, definitely were. Haniwa were typically clay figured used for rituals, and typically found buried with the dead. That certainly didn't give me any cheery thoughts.

"So it would seem," Naoto commented from nearby as all the others seemed to have gotten to their feet now.

"Excuse me. I have to apologize for the slightly impolite invitation," A woman with silver hair, no, platinum-blonde? And Golden eyes? And, wait is that who I think it is? She wasn't alone. Standing next to the platinum blond woman was a much more familiar individual, Miyuki. Unlike Miyuki the other woman was wearing a dark blue dress with high heels and black stockings. Her dress had long sleeves and had cuts that seemed to give her quite easy mobility. And her hair was stylized as well. She looked elegant and had an otherworldly beauty to her it felt. Miyuki was dressed just like before and had the Yasogami uniform but it was a deep blue, black and gold. Her uniform was as perfect as could be. As it would be on her. She hated things that were out of place, always the perfectionist. Some things don't seem to change. Even in someones after life. But this was definitely not expected.

"Miyuki?" I blinked. Before anyone could say anything Yu added his own surprise.

"Margaret?" He shook his head.

"Wait, Miyuki?" Rise stepped forward and quickly taking my arm.

"I hope somebody is planning to explain. I'll take anything at this point," Yosuke commented as we all seemed to be at a stand still. I couldn't give an answer I had no clue what this was.

"Forgive me for not introducing myself and my associate sooner. This is the first time we've all met. My name is Margaret. I am a helper on this young man's journey. I meant you no harm but felt it prudent to bring you here as soon as possible. And this is my apprentice," Margaret indicated Miyuki.

Miyuki stepped forward and gave a bow, "I'm Fujikara Miyuki. And yes, I'm Kay-chan's step-sister. Thank you all for saving my Onii-chan." I guess she had fully embraced being adopted siblings then.

"Wait, is this really her? Your childhood friend?" Yosuke asked.

I nodded, there was no point in denying it, but how it was even possible was probably what concerned them. "The one and only." I had told them all before I had met her when I was in that coma, but her being here was something a bit different.

Rise left my side and went straight up to Miyuki. I had no idea what she was going to do or say but I figure she had something to say to her. I expected her to do anything else, except for what she actually did. Rise bowed to Miyuki. "Thank you. I thought a lot about what I would do or say to you if I ever had a chance to meet you. But I know that if you had not done what you did. Even though that resulted in your death, then I likely would have never met Kayane. And it may be selfish for me to say this. However, I mean it with all that I am. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving him the chance to get away from his Uncle. To have the chance to move forward and live his life," Rise said and I had no idea what to say in response. I guess it really wasn't my place to. Both of them knew how I felt. Miyuki looked surprised by her actions and it took her a moment to give her own response.

"I was expecting you to want to hit me or something," Miyuki said, and then she moved up and pulled Rise up from her bow. "Please don't, Kujikawa. I want you to know that what you've done for Kay-chan is more than I ever have. You made him smile in a way I never got to see. Look, this isn't important right now. Margaret-san and I are here for a different reason. Narukami knows why."

"Do you remember? I have come to fulfill my promise," Margaret said directly to Yu.

"You mean about Marie? You found her?" Yu quickly asked. Well one would assume that we were standing in the place where Marie was, but how would she get here? Something about this was different. Different than the TV world we were accustomed to.

"Yes, I have come to guide you. I apologize for the amount of time it required us to prepare," Margaret said.

"I apologize as well. I am just an apprentice and still learning from Margarent-san," Miyuki bowed as well.

"Be that as it may, this place is called the Hollow Forest. The 'closed realm' created by her in the TV world, the 'world of the human mind'. It would seem that after Marie left us, she shut herself in here," Margaret's words held a lot of information. Still this was Margaret, as Miyuki had said, she was her teacher. And Miyuki had referred to herself as a being that ruled over power, and if she was only an apprentice then Margaret was likely incredibly powerful. Still had it required both of them to find this place?

"She shut herself in here? Did she remember something?" Yu was obviously trying to think of an answer.

"I do not know everything. But, as you are all aware, she was searching for her memory. And by opening her heart to all of you, she finally did regain that memory. It would seem that what she found was not what she had been hoping for," Margaret further explained.

"So, if she was capable of remembering and able to shut herself in here, does that mean she originates from this place?" I asked. It was a thought that I felt needed to be answered. Still if her memory drove her to leave us, then I could only imagine the truth about herself she discovered.

"From here? Inside the TV?" Yukiko and all the others were alarmed by this thought. But it was the only thing that made sense to me.

"Indeed, Marie is originally a 'resident' of this side," Magaret nodded an affirmation.

"She willingly came here. Does that mean Marie-san has the ability to use a Persona as well?" Naoto asked.

Miyuki was the one to answer this time, "Not exactly, her existence is a bit more unique than that. However this place is also much different then the TV world you all normally venture in to."

"Hold on. This is inside the TV, right? Then, aren't there Shadows in here?" Yukiko pointed out.

"So, Marie is in danger," Yu said clenching his fist. Yukiko took his arm to hopefully ease him.

Margaret shook her head. "I will not say that she is not in danger. However, the same goes for you. If you are to proceed ahead and search for Marie, you must have adequate resolution," Margaret once again directing her words to only Yu. It was obvious that this trial with Marie was important to Yu. And Margaret was a resident of the Velvet Room that Yu used to harness his powers and multiple Personae. Likely this trial had a big bearing on Yu and maybe even his destiny. However this affected more than just him.

"So, that's why you brought my friends?" Yu asked.

"The path ahead will be relentless. You alone will not be able to reach her. If you wish to see her again, then it is my role to help you. And to do so, I decided to invite everyone who has accompanied you on your journey so far, here," Margaret said simply.

"I see. I was wondering why you didn't bring just our leader here. Now I understand. You're giving us all the information and letting us choose what to do from here. You aren't here to stop us," Naoto said.

"Exactly," Margaret nodded.

"One more thing. Well, this isn't going to affect whether or not I plan to help, but you are also like Marie-san? A 'resident of this side?'" Naoto asked. Leave it to her to take an opportunity to learn more about how things work. I certainly couldn't blame her.

Margaret smiled a bit, "The human mind contains more than Shadows. I believe you all witnessed that in your last battle."

"Are you talking about those things that came out of Namatame and Adachi-san? Well, they were different from the Shadows we know about, but your saying that they weren't really Shadows at all?" Chie speculated.

"It does not matter how you choose to interpret it. What you see and what you believe are up to you. I know that you can supply yourselves with answers. As I know that you have been capable of coming this far with only each other to depend on. One more thing before I depart. As I just said, the Hollow Forest was originally a 'closed realm.' It is not the case now, but in time, this place will seal itself again," Margaret's words definitely sent an alarming fact to the group.

"In other words, our time to reach Marie-san is limited," Yosuke said.

"Exactly. It would seem that little time remains before the Hollow Forest completes itself. Once that time has passed, this place will be closed forever, and you will never be able to visit here again. If that happens, Marie's existence will be entirely expunged from your memories," Margaret was stating it as a fact but the words came across loud and clear.

"We'll lose our memories!?" Yukiko clutched onto Yu's arm tighter.

"Hey, what the hell are you talkin' about!? She's just gonna up and vanish from our heads?" Kanji likely didn't know how it is possible.

"No, it isn't just a way to remove memories but a method to completely erase yourself? Yu, she has to have a reason for this. And there is no way she didn't know when she came here. You need to think carefully about this. For what reason would she want to do that?" I let my words and thoughts out to Yu, the silver haired leader, who seemed to be trying to calm himself. Even with Yukiko at his side it didn't seem to be working. Still he took a moment and turned to Margaret.

"Margaret-san, can you explain further?" he asked calmly.

"It is exactly as I said. The closing of this forest marks the fact of Marie's erasure. Any memories you have of Marie will disappear, and you will return to your peaceful days," Margaret stated once more. This was more sad thinking about it now. I didn't have many memories of Marie to begin with, only having seen her a handful of times. But I knew what it had been like to attempt suicide. I thought no one would care, that no one would even notice. But people did, and my Mother had been devastated that I would try to do that. Marie would go one step further. There would never even be an acknowledgment of her existence, nobody would know that she was gone, and never would. She wouldn't even be a forgotten memory. It was an absolutely horrible thought.

"No..." Chie muttered. "This doesn't make any sense!"

Margaret simply shrugged, "I merely have come to fulfill my promise. What you do is up to you. I have made a link from the television in the mountain cabin to this world. That is the only conduit through which you may reach this place."

"So we can't get here through the TV in Junes?" Rise asked for clarity.

"Exactly. This world and your world's screens are linked, place to place...It is a fact," Margaret nodded.

"Hrmmm...I can't smell the other places from here...It really isn't connected," Teddie confirmed.

"...I am repeating myself, but it was Marie who shut herself in this world. There is no need for you to think that you must risk your lives for her. I am sure she would not wish that, either. Please, treasure the normal lives you have. That is what Marie would want. Now if you would excuse me," Margaret said with a wave and then disappeared.

Miyuki stood there for a moment and turned to leave as well.

"Miyu-chan?" I called out and had called her shortened named out on instinct. I felt my heart racing, seeing her was confusing to me, and a part of me wanted me to grab her and not let her go.

She looked back and smiled, "Yes, Onii-chan?" I could tell just by her tone how much she enjoyed it but I couldn't help but call it out.

"You really do enjoy that fact, don't you?" I shook my head. Rise was at my side but she didn't say anything. Neither did anyone else in the Investigation Team.

"We were basically family already. I mean Mom took both of us out whenever she was at home and not working," Miyuki giggled a bit. "I always wanted to have a brother...and you are definitely the best brother I could have asked for."

"That definitely sounds like you. I bet you would have had fun teasing me growing up," Not to mention my childhood being completely different. And I have a feeling if she had been around she would have been the overprotective big sister that would give the third degree to anyone that wanted to be my friend or vice versa.

"Maaayybe," she giggled and I couldn't help but laugh as well. Then she took a more serious expression before she continued. "Kayane, everything happened as it did for a reason. Not exactly the most reassuring reason considering what you suffered through, but look at where you are now. I hate that you had to go through so much, but you have amazing friends. And a pretty good looking girlfriend too. I mean you couldn't have just any girl, you had to snag yourself a former idol. Well I guess the two of you are going to be Idols together. But be cautious, both you and Rise have your own trials ahead beyond this. So whatever you all decide to do. There is nothing here that is forcing you to go after her. But, I know you Kay-chan. And I've seen how your friends have been up till now. It be strange if you just stopped."

"Wait! A trial for Kayane and I? What do you mean?" Rise asked.

Miyuki nodded with a slight smile, "The entity that tried to take him before is still chasing him. And eventually he will confront you, Rise-san. All of you here wield the power of Persona. And with that power you all gain the ability to choose. Its a choice that many people don't have. You call yourselves the Investigation Team because you seek the truth. If you continue to strive for that truth then you will find continuous fights ahead with people and other beings that would go to great lengths to hide it, or use it. Eventually you will have to make a decision on when you stop fighting that fight."

"Wait, do you know any more about Marie? Or why she came here?" Yu asked.

"I don't know. You're the one that asked Margaret-san to find her. If you can't accept losing her. Then you already know what you need to do," Miyuki looked to Rise. And she definitely seemed like she didn't care too much about the conversation about Marie. "Rise-san, it's likely we will see each other again. When we do, we'll have time to talk then. In the meantime, it's up to you to protect him. Bye for now, Onii-chan."

And then just like Margaret, she turned around and walked off. And right in front of our eyes she vanished. Miyuki was gone.

"Are all the Velvet Room residents vague as all hell?" Kanji grumbled. Which made me laugh as a result.

"It's just the way they are, the ways they can help are limited. They have rules they have to follow, I suppose," Yu said scratching his head.

"In that case Miyuki will fit right in. She was always someone that was by the book or had to have a specific order to everything," I sighed. We found ourselves standing in front of a lone TV, similar to the one back in the cabin. Thinking about it, things would have been massively different if Miyuki had been alive. Somehow I think Mom would have still adopted me, but more under Miyuki's insistence, or maybe reluctance because her initial far off plans had been to marry me. Then again even if she had been a few years older than me she was still young. Life would have changed us. And there really was no reason for me to be thinking about this other than for amusements sake. "This must be the exit, similar to the other ones Teddie spawns in the other one."

"Yes, more than likely," Naoto agreed. All of them seemed unsure of what to say.

"So now what!?" Chie was likely confused. We all had just gotten a crap ton of information. It was going to take time for us to shift through.

"What else? Marie is in here, right? If she's in danger of being attacked by Shadows, then we've gotta get in there and find her." Kanji said. Looking at what might be an entrance to deeper into the Hollow Forest.

"Hold on. It might not be that simple. Let us leave for now, at any rate. We cannot blindly run ahead so suddenly," Naoto said.

"Yeah. Plus, we're totally unprepared, right? We don't have any of our gear. So if we're gonna do it, let's get ready and take this on full-force!" Yosuke added. It was true though, it would be kinda stupid to push forward with only our Personae. Not having our weapons with us seemed kind of reckless.

With that decided, we all made our way back through the TV. It was definitely noticeable that the TV's Teddie left us to escape the TV world was a lot easier to come out of than this one. I came out and realized I had been grabbing Rise's, um...do I really have to say it. I quickly released but there was no way that Rise didn't notice.

"Ooo, Kayane, not in front of the others," she grinned back at me.

"Oh come on, there was like no room and...you know what I'll grab you when and where I want to," I said deciding to play along with her instead of pretending it didn't happen.

"So bold, Senpai," she said getting closer to me. And seemed perfectly okay with all of it. Well considering all that had happened when we were alone in this cabin, and how likely it would have escalated a lot further. Although I couldn't say one way or another how I would react to it going further. That was okay though, despite how Rise wanted to go further, we needed to take our time. Plus, I don't think I was ready for that. Even earlier I had started shaking but only hid it from the others thanks to Rise's quick thinking.

"Will you two give it a break? I mean we got things to talk about, right?" Kanji interrupted.

"Yeah we need to make a plan of action," Chie added.

I merely shrugged and got to my feet. I noticed the fire I had started was just embers now in the cabin. "So Marie really was from the other side. But she isn't a Shadow like Teddie. What does that make her? I wonder. Miyuki is a resident of the Velvet Room too but she was also once human. So I am beginning to wonder how things work for them there. But there is probably is a reason for that and likely one we'll never find out. Either way, what's important is Marie. I assume you were fully aware of where she came from, Yu? At least I get the impression that you do."

"I did but there wasn't really a chance to explain. It was never really relevant to anything," Yu hung his head. "And it wasn't like Marie knew, she was just able to enter the Velvet Room somehow."

"Haha, no one's complaining, man. If you'd tried introducing her like, 'Oh, she's from another world,' the question mark above my head could have been seen from orbit," Yosuke simply laughed it off. It was pretty ridiculous notion to be sure.

"The issue here is Marie-san's motive. Why would she risk her life to shut herself in a place like that?" Naoto started the deduction.

"I could see it if she was thrown in like we were, but why would she do that to herself?" Rise asked.

"I can think of a few reasons," I said, not really elaborating on it for the moment. "We already know what changed before she disappeared, right?"

"Her memory," Yu said simply. "If she remembered something, then that is likely the reason."

"Yeah, something that made her believe she needed to not only die, but erase her entire existence," I immediately went to the conclusion that the others wouldn't want to go to.

"Die?" the others became alarmed.

"Why would she..." Rise stopped.

"There are plenty of different reasons. You all have had to face that fact before. When you went through my dungeon, right?" I asked the others. "Think about it for a moment."

"He's right," Naoto spoke up. "Senpai's Shadow was cold and one that greatly affected Rise-chan while we were there. But this is different. It feels different."

"I can't leave her like this. I'm going to find her and bring her back," Yu said.

"You aren't going alone," Yukiko added.

"We all have a way to relate to her, but there isn't any way we'll find out why she is doing this unless we chase after her," I said softly. "The best way is to confront her directly."

"So, we're all in agreement then?" Naoto asked.

"Hell yeah," Kanji nodded.

"That's right. Still, we should find out exactly what we're getting into, first. It's better to learn anything we can than to go in knowing nothing. It'll at least make things easier on us," Yosuke said.

"We should devote a day to it then. Teddie and Rise-chan, can you scan that world? From the usual spot, of course, just to confirm we can't get there from Junes. The rest of us should rest up to prepare for the exploration. If there are Shadows in there, then we can't avoid fighting them," Naoto made suggestions.

"Probably the best idea," Yu agreed.

"Yeah! All right, it's super-sniffy time together with Rise-chan! Heheheh...My superultramegahyperuber Teddie nose can pick up even the slightest scent! But...This skill is not without its drawbacks. After three minutes, I get just an ungodly amount of snot..." Teddie stated, proudly for some reason.

"Ewwww!" Rise pushed Teddie to the ground and clung close to me.

"Hey, don't damage the bear before showtime. At least he's actually useful in a fight," Yosuke muttered.

"How rude! What do you mean, 'at least'!?" Teddie was offended.

Rise and Teddie went back in to scan the inside of it since we were here. With Naoto and Kanji going in with them just in case. I stood there for a moment and looked to Yu who had Yukiko at his side and refusing to leave him. Something about seeing the two of them like this felt off to me.

"Yu, I hope you realize you owe your girlfriend big time after all this. She's been worried sick about you since Marie disappeared," I said point blank.

"No, really its fine, Ikakure-senpai. I know she's important to him and..." Yukiko tried to dismiss it.

"You are too, Yukiko. I'm sorry I've worried you so much," Yu quickly apologized.

Still this was the first step, first we would save Marie. Who knew what we would have to face after we did that. But if what Miyuki had said was any indication. Striving for the truth would lead to only more fights. And eventually there was a trial that Rise and I would have to face along that path. I suppose the only thing I could hope I could do was to remain strong enough to face it. If I even was.


A/N:

Relationships have never been easy for anyone. Well I'm sure if you're able to read peoples minds then it would be all too easy to navigate relationships, because if your ever unsure of what you should do, you can read their minds. But even then you are still picking and choosing who you want to impress and who you don't care about. In the end, barring any supernatural abilities, relationships are a lot more work than people realized when their young. That's why a lot of adults often scoff at young relationships, especially teenagers. It isn't because of anything malicious though, its simply because adults have been there and been in those relationships. Adults know how much experience of the real world they didn't have when they were in that position and how naive they must have been. Now, I'm not saying that isn't always the case. For just as many cases of young love turning to bad relationships there are also cases (albeit much fewer) of things working out.

So what really sets young Relationships apart? Strangely enough it fits in a lot with the themes of Persona 4 as a whole. We hide what we don't like about ourselves, even to those we believe are worthy to be trusted with everything. We do it almost unconsciously, avoiding subjects we'd rather say nothing about. Yet it is these very subjects that eventually come to light and drive a wedge into a relationship. I made this mistake several times in different relationships as I grew up. I wasn't honest about my fears and insecurities and instead of confronting it with my significant other, I ran away. Much like Kayane does. The difference here is that Rise is incredibly aware of why Kayane does this. But this situation is something incredibly rare. At this point Rise knows almost everything about the horrible things that have happened to him, and is well aware of how he acts in certain situations. Its part of why I like this chapter so much.

Rise flat out tells Kayane that he's allowed to react naturally with how he feels, that he wants her to be angry at her and mostly she wants him to be completely honest with her. And she's well aware that given time he will talk to her about it. Plus she's not the type to just let things go when she knows it will be a problem. Kayane, however, is the type to let things go, thinking the only one with a problem is him and in general will always pin the blame on himself, never anyone else. This is probably the main source of conflict in Kayane and Rise's relationship and why often times it can feel like we come around to the same problems. The reality is that its the same way in the real world. It takes a lot of work and constant attention to ensure that you don't repeat mistakes because its habit. Kayane has spent his life telling people what they want just so he could fade into the background. Rise changes that, making him the center of her attention. She wants him to be confident and proud of what he does with his talents. Being a singer and a piano player and also being able to write music is incredible. There are plenty of start in the world that can sing but don't know an instrument. Or those that can play, but could never carry a tune, and then there are those that just play an instrument but never trust that they could compose music themselves. Yet Kayane does this and constantly puts himself down by comparing himself to the others around him.

Naturally all of that is because of Kayane's fear of losing something precious. He's afraid of losing everything that he has gained up to this point. However it is that same fear and him reverting to how he was before that could make him lose exactly what he is afraid of losing. It's like the whole thing of hurting yourself so that nobody else can. It's a self-destructive mentality and its something that Kayane has in spades. To put it a bit in perspective, imagine what kind of mentality you have to be in in order to attempt suicide. It's more than just wishing you were dead, you also have to demean yourself to a point where you can justify the fact that after you are dead, nobody would care. Most suicides usually come at a couple of different low points, it can come from just hitting really low, to the point where you only care about yourself and ending the life you deem to be not worth living. This view point doesn't factor in other people, mostly because if it had they likely wouldn't have gone through with it. Suicide of this nature often happens spontaneously after being railroaded by repeated bad and depressing events. The other viewpoint occurs by an individual that justifies their death by everything around them. They perceive that no one really cares about them, they start to believe that them dying wouldn't change anything. And the thing that hangs over their head the most is that no one would grieve for them when they were gone. It all has to do with perspective and how someone sees the people and environment around. Most times we are often blind to the people that actually care about us. That was Kayane's problem. Plenty of people cared about him but his look around the world was narrow and focused almost entirely on himself and how he felt. He didn't look around to see how others felt, but because the attention he did get wasn't what he perceived as genuine care for him, he felt that no one did. Still his adopted Mother was doing all in her power to try and help him as he was growing up. She was devastated because all she did never seemed to amount to anything. She changed her tactics time and time again to try and find something. It wasn't until after his suicide attempt that she finally found something he latched onto. Music.

Life isn't easy as I'm sure everyone can attest to. We seek out moments in which we can find happiness and things to enjoy. I write as a form of comfort to myself, a means to deal with difficult issues without actually being in the situation myself. I challenge and push my characters because I want to see them overcome it and become better people, even if they are simply characters on page. This fan fiction came about because there was something I wanted to see and experience with the themes of Persona 4, but it never goes far to delve into those.

Relationships will always be difficult, it requires constant attention and honesty to truly work. There is also a lot of cultural differences between western and eastern culture when it comes to this. The scandal that Persona 4 starts with is actually an indicator to what those differences are. Namatame who is a politician and a well known one is married to a famous Enka singer. Two very successful individuals in different fields. And it isn't to say the two didn't care for one another but generally love, or what we perceive as love in the west is much different. Love in most eastern culture is more like an oath of loyalty. By proclaiming you love someone, you are saying you will remain faithful to them and strive to do what is best for the two of you, as a unit. Western culture, proclaiming love for someone is usually the last thing you do as we value it and interpret it in a much more intimate way. Ever watched anime and felt it was really weird that someone started off by proclaiming they loved someone? Even though its obvious they don't know much about that person. The reason for this is simply because what we think love to be is different than what eastern cultures think love is. It's a very interesting subject to look into if you have the time.

Anyway, I'm off on a tangent this week, lol. Obviously I'm trying to build Rise and Kayane's relationship to something, somewhat believable growth. Obviously peoples mileage may vary in that regard. But at the very least I want the problems they have to be interesting and help their relationship grow, even if it means hitting a lot of bumps along the way. And yeah they are certainly lovey dovey now, and Rise may be wanting to explore the physical side of the relationship a bit more, but these are often problems that people face. It's going to take time for Kayane to get over his physical intimacy issues. And it isn't as simple as just 'getting over' it. Our mind is complex and can hold us back unconsciously. Plus we still got a lot of story to go through.

Enough of my ranting, thanks so much everyone for taking time to read my fan fiction. I hope you've all enjoyed it and will continue to enjoy it as we move forward. Next chapter we rush in to save Marie. But who is to say something might happen along the way. Alright, I'll stop now, haha. I will see you all next week with the next chapter.