All eyes went to Lou. "I suppose you're right Teaspoon. As soon as I get it out, the sooner I can move on." She said sighing. She went over to Jamie and pulled a blanket over him, making sure he was fast asleep.
Rachel put on a new pot of coffee, knowing this could take a while. Lou sat back down in her chair and began. She chose not to keep any secrets tonight. It was time they heard the truth even if it did paint Kid in a not so pleasant light.
"The truth is I'm not quite sure where my husband is. Kid left me a note about a week ago saying he was leaving and that he wasn't sure he was coming back. He told me that our marriage was a mistake."
"I don't believe that," Cody said." That doesn't sound like The Kid."
"I know Cody but Kid's not the same person he was before. It was like…as soon as we crossed into Virginia he changed," Lou said." Whole way there he told me how beautiful the land was and how wonderful our life was going to be. He talked about buying a ranch and some horses and breeding 'em. We talked about havin' a family." Lou paused to gather her thoughts.
"We got to Richmond and rented a room above one of the shops. The war was already in full force and soldiers were everywhere. Kid got a job at the livery, but I could tell he was much more interested in joining up with the army as soon as possible. I was happy living in town and quickly made some friends including a woman who owned a dress shop, Nancy. She even offered me a job working there but Kid didn't like that idea. You know Kid. Can't have his woman workin'." Lou rolled her eyes and thought that some things never changed she guessed.
"Well it wasn't long and Kid signed up in the army. He'd be gone for weeks, sometimes months at a time. He'd come back and say that the war was almost over. Each time he headed out he said that the next time he'd be back, it'd be for good. Well, it was that winter I found out I was expectin'." She smiled at the memory. "I couldn't wait for him to come home so I could tell him the wonderful news, but he didn't come home that winter. I was afraid he got killed. So many other families were getting the horrible news about their sons and husbands. I figured it was a matter of time when I'd hear the news. If it wasn't for Nancy, I'm not sure how I would've made it through those months."
Lou looked up into the eyes of her family and Rachel asked "Why didn't you tell me in your letters how bad it had gotten?"
"Oh Rachel, it wouldn't have done any good. I knew what I was getting into when we left Rock Creek. I knew Kid would join the army and I'd have to wait it out. I just wasn't prepared to have to it with a baby on the way so soon." Looking up again she gained strength in their faces and continued.
"That spring, Kid returned but he looked half-dead. He lost a lot of weight and was covered in new scars. He saw my growing waist and well I didn't get the reaction I expected."
"He got real angry and asked who the father was. I couldn't believe it. How dare he? The next day he purchased some land several miles out of town with a small cabin on it. He moved us out there and told me I wasn't to leave without him. He stayed there with me for about a month and then some men came to the cabin looking for him. It wasn't long and Kid rode out with them. He never even said goodbye, just took off. I didn't hear from him again until after Jamie was born. I hated staying in that cabin all alone so far from town. Several times the army would come through our land and camp out on it. One time they even barged into the house looking for food."
The gasp came from Jimmy. "Did they…hurt you?" He asked afraid to hear her answer.
"No, thankfully. At least not like what you're thinking. It might've had something to do with me being so heavy with child." Lou smiled sadly. "They tore up the place but then went on with their business. I left the cabin and stayed with Nancy after that though. I had the baby in town and stayed there until Kid came back several months later."
"Jamie was already crawling when Kid first laid eyes on his son. He offered no explanation why he left when he did or why I hadn't heard from him. He was angry that I wasn't at the cabin. I couldn't understand why he was being so unreasonable. We got into a big fight and he left again. I didn't see him again for almost a year."
It was at that time that Teaspoon spoke up. "Merciful God. Why didn't you just come home sweetheart? We would've helped you and Jamie."
Lou took a moment and thought how best to explain her decisions back then. "Teaspoon, not a day went by that I didn't think about coming home. However, I thought if I left Virginia it would be giving up on my marriage and I just wasn't ready to abandon Kid like that."
"But Lou, he abandoned you." Jimmy said full of anger. "How could The Kid leave you and the baby like that?"
"It was a war Jimmy. Husbands left their families to fight all over the country. What kind of wife would I be to leave him just for being lonely." Jimmy just shook his head in anger.
Lou continued. "When he came back next he was real sick, had a terrible cough and fever. He lay in bed for days. Doctor said he just needed rest. As he was getting better, he started acting more and more like the Kid I fell in love with. We bought some chickens and a cow. We fixed up the cabin real nice. Kid finally started bonding with his son and I thought things were great. He even asked what I thought of giving little Jamie a brother or sister. After trying for several months, I wasn't able to get pregnant and Kid started getting angry again. He would go into town and start drinking and then come home and tell me how he was wasting his time when he should be fighting. He finally left again for the last time but this time he left a note."
Lou stood up and went over to the bunk Jamie laid on and pulled a blanket over him. Then she went to her bag and pulled out the note that Kid had left for her and returned to the chair she was sitting in. She had read it so many times the paper had gotten worn. She read it for the first aloud.
Dear Lou,
I'm sorry but I've come to realize this isn't working out. I can't play house when there are good men dying on the battlefield. Virginia will never be your home as it is mine. I don't know if I'm James' father or not. I can't trust what you did while I was away. I just know that the dreams we had will never be. I expect that you will not be here when I return and that is fine. You're free to live your life now. Have a good life.
Love,
Kid
"That's it. That's all it says?" Jimmy asked. "A man leaves his wife and just says have a good life?" Unbelievable!" Jimmy stood up and started pacing.
"So, that's when you finally decided it was time to come home Lou?" asked Rachel.
"Yes, but not before I got some answers," Lou said with her head down. "I was hesitant to leave before the war ended especially with a child. I stayed in town with Nancy making plans when I overhead some men talking about Kid and some nurse at the barracks named Annabelle. Apparently Kid liked to talk when he was drinking the night away at the saloon. I figured it was time to pay this Annabelle a visit. I went to the army barracks and asked around. Well, long story short, Kid had been seeing this woman for some time and she may possibly be carrying his child."
"WHAT?" Everyone chimed in at the same time.
"Yeah, that was the moment I decided it was time to leave whether the war was over or not. I was getting out of Virginia immediately. Jamie and I left on the stage the next day."
Teaspoon was the first to speak after a long pause. "What a fool" was all he said.
"Sure doesn't sound much like a Southern gentleman to me." Cody tried to joke but was quickly cut off by an angry Jimmy. "Cody shut up!"
"It's alright boys, I've made peace with it. Kid and I just were never going to work. He always wanted something I couldn't give him. I just feel bad for Jamie." Lou said as she looked over at her sleeping son. How was she going to explain to him that his own father didn't want him?
"Well Louise," Rachel said. "I think I can speak for everyone when I tell you that we're so happy that you're here now. You will always have a home right here, and we will help with whatever you need." The others all spoke in agreement. "That's right." "Of course" "We're here for you Lou."
Lou looked to Jimmy and was relieved to see a smile on his face. Down deep she was most worried about his reaction. He didn't say anything but Lou knew in that moment there would be plenty of time to talk about things. After all, she was looking forward to hearing all about what she had missed while she was gone.
"Well it's getting late," Rachel said. "Lou, you and Jamie can both fit on that bed in the spare room. I'll go get some fresh sheets on it."
"Rachel, if it's okay with everybody I'd like to stay in the bunkhouse. The truth is it feels more like home than anything else right now." Lou stated hoping she understood.
"Of course Louise, whatever you want, but the house would be more comfortable than these old bunks." Rachel pointed out.
"I know Rachel, but maybe just for tonight, if that's okay?" Lou said.
"I understand." Rachel said with a smile. "Just let me know if you need anything."
Rachel headed back to the house while Cody and Jimmy stepped out of the bunkhouse to let Lou get changed for bed.
Cody mentioned to Jimmy that he was going to pay a visit to his girlfriend Sarah before turning in for the night. Cody hadn't mentioned her all evening but was looking forward to her meeting Lou as he thought they would get along real well. Sarah was working at the hotel and she and Sarah had been seeing each other for several months. It was getting pretty serious or at least to Cody it seemed it was.
After a few minutes, Jimmy stepped back into the bunkhouse and was met by a crying Lou.
"Lou honey, what's wrong?" Jimmy asked bending down to her level as she sat on the bunk that used to be hers. "I'm not sure" she admitted. "I think the day is just catching up to me. I was so worried about everyone's reactions that it's such a relief to have everything out and you all don't hate me." Jimmy sat down next to Lou and placed an arm around her shoulder. She leaned her head into his shoulder. "We could never hate you Lou. We love you too much." He smiled wide as she looked up at his face. There was something else in his expression she couldn't quite place. Maybe she was thinking too much of it. She was extremely tired after all. "Goodnight Jimmy" she said as she kissed his cheek. It brought back a memory of another time and place when she said and did the same. This time though he simply kissed her forehead and said "Goodnight Lou. I'll be back here in a little bit. I'm going to check in on the office and Cody will be back soon too. Will you be okay?"
"Yes Jimmy, I think I will be." She said with a smile. For the first time in a long while she really thought she'd be okay.
