CHAPTER 3

Patricia's POV

The sun shone through the curtains in our room as I glanced over to Eddie. Let's just say we stayed up late doing… activities. His eyes were closed as he laid there, just a sheet covering his lower half.

"Morning," I stretched then went to kiss him on the cheek

"Morning," his hair was a mess, probably from our activities last night. I walked over to Luna's crib and glanced at her. There's nothing more calming than watching your baby sleep peacefully. Eddie tip-toed behind me and wrapped his arms around me. We both stood there for a moment watching as she slept

"I'm gonna go start breakfast, I'll let you get her up," I began my descent down the stairs when I heard Eric's voice. He usually wasn't up this early. On Saturdays I would make breakfast for all four of us.

"Yeah she's doing fine. The two of them went out last night, it's nice to watch them do normal uni things." Eric said. I knew he was talking about me on the phone, but I didn't know who he was talking with.

"I got the check for the month. You guys really don't have to keep sending those. It's no trouble for me. Anyways, how's Parlament?"

"Who are you talking to?" I turned the corner and that's when Eric noticed me.

"I have to go but it was nice chatting with you," he spoke into the phone then set it down. "Um no one." I could tell he was lying.

"What's going on?"

"Nothings going on," his face was covered in guilt as he turned to the stove. "Who wants breakfast?"

"No, who were you talking to. Oh my god." The dots connected in my brain. "You were talking to my mother weren't you?" All he could do was stare down at the floor.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" I was furious. I had called, texted, emailed my mother hundreds of times. I hadn't heard a peep from her in over 18 months. My own mother basically cut me out from her life. "When did she contact you?"

"Right after Luna was born."

"So you mean to tell me you've had contact with my mother for an entire year and you didn't think it was important to mention it to me?!?" I was practically yelling when Eddie came down the stairs.

"Geez what's the yelling about?" Eddie asked while carrying Luna on his hip.

"Your father had forgotten to mention to me that he's been in contact with my mother. For the past year."

"What?" Eddie looked almost as pissed as I was.

I turned to face Eric again. "Why haven't you told me?"

"Your mother didn't want you knowing that we were in contact."

"So you hid it from me for a year?"

"She was still angry over the whole situation."

I took a deep breath, calm down Patricia, nothing is ever solved when you yell. "Is there anything else you should tell me?"

"She's been sending money every month. Just a basic cost for food, electrics, that kind of thing," his voice was quiet with this last comment.

"I can't believe this," I turned on my heels, storming up the stairs and slamming our door as I passed the frame. I plopped on the bed, burning with anger. I can't believe he wouldn't tell me? This whole time he was talking with her? Steaming with anger, I heard a whisper of a knock at the door. Eric peered his head through the door.

"Listen Patricia, I reached out to her 2 days after Luna was born. I tried to get her to make amends with you but she couldn't, at that moment. I did it because I lived with the regret of leaving my child for all those years. There was no day that went by that I didn't think of Eddie and regret my choice of leaving him in the States."

"I get it," was all I could say.

"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you earlier. I just didn't know how." Eric sat down at the end of our bed as I sat in the rocking chair across from him.

"You're right."

"Wow, I never thought Patricia 'I'm Never Wrong' Williamson would concede to someone else being right for once." I glanced over my shoulder to see Eddie leaning up against the door frame. I rolled my eyes at Eddie.

"Would she be willing to talk now?" I asked in a quiet tone.

"I can ask her."

I nodded, afraid to ask anything else.

Days passed before Eric talked to my mother again. She begrudgingly agreed to meet me for coffee to catch up. I didn't know how I felt about all of it. Did I want to see her? What would I even say?

The day that my mother had agreed to meet with me had finally arrived. I was sitting on our bed trying to brush my hair when Eddie walked in. He had to leave for work soon. My mother and I had agreed to meet for morning coffee. I decided to bring Luna along, well, I didn't really have a choice. Today I didn't have classes so Eddie could work.

"You ready for today?" Eddie asked as he put on his nicer pants.

"No, but I don't think I'll ever be." I took a deep breath, trying to breath out my nerves.

"Hey it's not like she can tell you she wishes she wasn't having your child." He said, trying to tie his tie.

"Eddie? What did you say?" I stopped what I was doing and stared at him.

"What? I didn't say anything," He replied with regret of what he just said written all over his face. He didn't even realize what he said until after he said it.

"What are you talking about?" My brows furrowed in confusion.

"Nothing. What are you talking about?" Ok, now he was just trying to evade the question. I stood up and grabbed his hand.

"Remember the who 'no secrets thing.'" He took my hand and we sat down on the edge of our bed. I glanced at him, anxiety in overdrive.

"Remember," he took a deep breath, "Remember when you were a sinner?"

"Not really, you know that."

"About that. I didn't tell you everything that happened during that."

"What do you mean?" I had no idea where he was going with this.

"Well, when Frobisher had kidnapped me and held me in the tank room, you were there."

"But you told me I wasn't, the other sinners tried to bring out your anger, but I didn't.

"Yeah, I lied about that. And you may have said something that I know didn't come from you I guess."

"Eddie, what did I say?" He took a long pause before he opened his mouth to speak. He stared at my hands when he finally spoke.

"'Isn't it sad Eddie, how the only fact I've stayed with you so long is because you got me knocked up. I never wanted to have a kid with you, not now and not ever,'"

I didn't know how to react to that. Did I really say that to him?

"Eddie, you know I have never felt that ever." I moved my hand to cup his face, making him meet my eyes. "I know Luna wasn't planned but I'm confident when I say there is no one else I'd rather spend the rest of my life with. I love you Edison Miller. And I know life is shitty but I can't think of another person I'd rather go it through with. I have never loved anyone more than I love you and I don't think I ever will."

I leaned in to kiss him as a tear trickled down my face. As our lips pulled apart, Luna toddled in with her blanket.

"Mamá." I turned my head to see my little Luna come to me.

"Come here my little peanut." I scooped my daughter up into my arms as Eddie held me in his.

"I knew it wasn't really you saying those things."

"I know, it's just, I don't know. I would never say anything like that to deliberately hurt you."

He kissed the top of my head as he began to collect his keys.

"I need to go, but I'll see you tonight."

--

The door opened to the small coffee shop in the middle of downtown as I pushed Luna in her small stroller. My mom hadn't arrived yet so I found a table on the edge of the room. Luna was asleep through the drive downtown as well as when we got there. My foot was tapping like I had already drank my coffee. My stomach was in knots while I looked at my phone then back at the door and then back at my phone again.

The bells to the door began to chime and as I glanced up, my mother was walking in. We made eye contact as I stood up. She came up to me and gave me an awkward hug. We both sat down around the small circular table. She was the one to say something first.

"How've you been?"

"Good, and you?" I hated small talk.

"Busy, but good." I could tell she was uncomfortable. We sat through a long pause of silence.

"Why didn't you ever respond to me?" I was sick of the pleasantries. "I called, texted, emailed, hell I called your assistants but nothing." I was afraid I would burst into tears any moment.

"Patricia, I know our relationship hasn't always been easy."

"That's the understatement of the century," I snapped back.

"But I've always loved you. I'm ashamed for leaving you. When Eric called me I realized that I had made the biggest mistake of my life. But I-I thought you had made it 6 months without me, so maybe it was best for you. Why would you want to see me after what I put you through?

I didn't know what to say to all of that.

"You abandoned me when I needed my mom most. When I needed you most. Do you know everything that was going on? No you don't. All I wanted was you to be there when I gave birth. Every girl wants their mum there. You know who was there? Eddie's mom, and Trudy. Do you know who got me through this entire pregnancy no matter how small the inconvenience? Who sat up with me when I couldn't sleep because I was in so much pain? Who held me while I cried because my mother refused to answer my calls? Eddie. He was the one that convinced me to come here today. He has stayed with me every step of the way. Even when I put him through hell, he stayed by my side. Look I'm sorry I wasn't Piper, ok. I'm not the perfect child but you don't have to cut me out of your life because I made one mistake. No, I take that back. Eddie and Luna have never been a mistake. They are the best people to come into my life period. They are my family."

"You have every right to be upset. To be honest I don't blame you. I've been a shitty parent for too long and I'm so sorry Patricia. I messed up, more times than I'm willing to admit."

We sat in a long pause of silence before I took a deep breath to calm my anger and I spoke up again.

"Would you like to hold her?"

"Of course."

"I lifted her out of her stroller, half asleep. She woke up once I began to lift her.

"Mama food." I wasn't surprised she was hungry, she is half Eddie.

"I want you to meet someone peanut." I brushed her light brown hair off her forehead as she gazed at me with her beautiful green eyes. "This is your grandma." I handed her over to my mum. Within 30 second she started crying and trying to reach for me. My mum was swift in handing her back to me. She didn't want Luna to be upset.

"Sorry," I said. "She gets like that with new people. She can be kind of a brat sometimes."

"She's just very headstrong, like someone else I know," she winked back. "Patricia, look, I know that I hurt you and you may never forgive me. But, I want to be a part of Luna's life."

"Ok." What else was there to it.

"I've missed you so much honey."

"I've missed you too mum."

"Anyways, I have some exciting news. I'm in the running for Foreign Minister. You know that I've been wanting this position for forever and-"

"And you thought that it would be in your best interest to get me back in your life again. God, It's always about optics with you isn't it. It's always about how the public sees you. How you're this perfect mother. Yes her daughter got pregnant but look at how close they are. No, no." I stood up out of my chair and rested Luna back into her stroller. "I've been your political pawn for the past 19 years and I will not let you do the same to my daughter."

Pushing Luna's stroller out of the shop, I stormed out of there as fast as I could. Once I got into the car, all I could do was put my head down and sob. I couldn't believe I had trusted her again. To believe she actually cared about me and wanted to fix our relationship. To say I was hurt would be an understatement.