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Ianto stood there with a feeling he could not escape.
When his mother died he felt this… despair. In the middle of the Tower falling he felt this loss. And now… sliding the last of the cybertech into the furnace he felt it lingering long after the smell of Lisa's burning flesh had dissipated to make way for the rubbery smell of her cybernetics.
He was exhausted.
He turned from the furnace, patting the button to close the front blast doors and he staggered under the weight of the buckets, carrying them to the room that was almost scrubbed clean. Just a little more. He finished that and rose to splash the last of the water from the bucket across the floor, watching the tiny bubbles race for the far grating like they were lemmings running for the cliff and then he saw the boots standing on said grating.
Of course.
Ianto raised his head and wearily looked at the man who stood in his Great Coat. No Webley drawn. Ianto knew this meant it was likely that they were going to take this someplace else. Ianto was not sure how to feel about that. On one hand… he did just clean this up so it would be a shame to leave another mess but on the other hand… he had preferred to die here with her.
"I just need to put this stuff away sir, I shall be along directly" Ianto croaked out, looking for the sponge he had forgotten to get out of one of the buckets and he saw it over on the far grate, kneeling to pick it up. "All done and dusted. Tickitey-boo"
"Come find me when you are ready for the de-brief" Jack said softly, turning on his heel and Ianto closed his eyes against the pain. Jack had sounded… sad. Ianto would have preferred anger really, the disappointment the man felt in him more crushing somehow.
Ianto was walking up through the levels when Gwen met him heading down and she huffed as she placed her hands on her hips "He sent me to get you, some of us want to go home after this ya know."
"Sorry my demise is not coming fast enough for your need for closure" Ianto muttered as he placed the bucket in it's correct spot. "I don't' want to leave work for the next butler."
"Just get a move on for fucksake, some of us have lives to get home to!" she snapped as she spun to leave and Ianto felt a sob clawing its way up his throat at the cruel reminder that his life was about to be over. Nothing for him to go home to now… except his own rest.
He sat on the loo to make sure he was well cleaned out (wouldn't do to shit himself in his death throes, so unseemly) before a hot shower and his best suit, the shave as close as he could manage with shaking hands. He morosely reached the main Hub and looked for Owen who would need to do the final bloods and such before the execution could take place… or the freezer drawer where they can pretend one day he might be thawed out… right… but… he knew better. He would go down looking his best, if only so Jack could see him that way when he checked on him every few years for any degrading. That happens too ya know.. the chryo units failing and … rotten meat. Somehow Ianto would prefer that and he wondered if he could sabotage his unit to ensure that might happen.
No… Toshiko would be upset. What with her Tommy in one.
Toshiko was at her workstation talking hard and fast as her fingers flew, a rogue blowfish at the fairground scaring people. Ianto slid behind her to see that the entire team had gone, all there bar Toshiko who was transfixed on the screen.
Ianto had a window.
He released Myfanwy, wishing her luck as he took a deep breath and looked at her graceful flight one more time.
He moved quickly, sitting at Jacks' desk to write a note of apology for the file, then a second one that he slid into Jack's drawer where he sought candy late at night so it would not be found straight away, the more officinal one left on the desk. He was ready, now he could go but as he looked down at Toshiko from Jack's office window he had a sudden… startling thought that had not occurred to him and he sat back cheekily against the side of the desk as he chewed over this new voice whispering in the back of his mind.
There was something left to do… if there was time. He made sure the money in that hidden account would transfer over to the other more hidden one he set up to pay Rhiannon so within the week she could still get that fortnightly amount she thought was from their father's estate. All tht money he had siphoned off for Lisa's future… might as well go to someone. Enough there to see her good for years.
He headed to the medical bay, starting the exit file for Owen and as he drew a sample of his blood he felt the utter despair of finality. This is it. All over. Ianto tried not to care, tried to reason that it was part of some cosmic plan.
What he deserved.
He set the machine to do the blood test and moved on to the paperwork, the ping of the analyser making him reach for the printout without looking up from the slow deliberate sweep of the ball point pen as it described his injures.
He sat back and looked at the sheet of paper, his mouth dry.
He does not know how long he sat there but it was almost too long, the team's laughter over the Hub speakers brining him out of his fugue as he rose and started to scrub the test from the main server. He had to … fuck. OK. Focus Twpsyn. Panic later OK? The voice in his head was calm and soothing, her soft purr almost like a hug and he calmed for a moment before checking his watch and calculated from their last coordinates to their arrival back at base.
He had time.
He rose and sent a silent apology to Toshiko for doing this on her shift… then… he walked calmly out to the tourist office and reached under the desk for his grab bag kept there for such emergencies.
He opened the door and stepped outside into the sea air, took a deep breath then….
Ianto ran.
.
..
"Dennis!"
"Hello Mister Shrives" Ianto smiled as he held out his hand "come for me car."
"Oh aye? Thought you would be another three weeks until your monthly cheque" the old man rose to wipe his hand on a rag, then accept the handshake of the Englishman who was a right tosser full of London airs.
"The deal fell through and my investors are all arseholes. Good thing I don't really care about their money, eh?" Ianto said, the fake English accept so polished and… natural.
"Never mind boy… well… it's all ready to go. Fresh paint job, the lot" the man handed over the key and Ianto slid into the Volvo that was rude and somehow fitting for the personality he was emulating.
"Tootle Pip!" Ianto yelled as he drove off at speed and the old man shook his head as he muttered to himself.
"Twat"
.
.
Ianto drove for all of fifteen minutes, pulling into a less than legal car yard and honked three times. Men emerged and surrounded the car as Ianto got out as he yelled with a guttural London twang now "Hey Muncher… got another one for ya. Hey… while you have a second… that nice looking Suzuki over there… that for the chop too?"
The huge black man that emerged stared at the 4x4 sitting in the yard and frowned "Nah Thomas, that one was just a trade-in. Piece of shit is legal, just feckin old. Shit, this is nice… lovely paint job. Shame to kill it… might lift the body intact."
"Sounds like a plan… ah… swapsies? It's legal too."
"Seriously? This for that? Shit yeah. Cheers Thomas, my wife will be well pleased with this" Muncher grinned.
"Yeah well… never saw me right?" Ianto tapped his nose as the man laughed and soon Ianto was on the road again.
The shell game was afoot.
