Naruto picked at the material beginning to unravel on his couch, sweat dripping down into his eyes, oppressive heat surrounding him.
Summer had arrived in Konoha.
And his air-conditioner had chosen the perfect time to die on him.
His apartment felt like an oven now, and he was broke at the moment.
Wouldn't have the money to get it fixed for a while.
He snatched the couch thread loose with a yank.
Sunlight shined in through the blinds on his windows, illuminating his messy apartment.
He wiped the sweat out of his eyes and rubbed at the bridge of his nose.
A fan weakly spinning in the corner was the only thing breaking the deafening silence in his apartment.
He ran his fingers through his hair with a tired sigh.
Naruto left his jacket sitting on the couch as he rose to his feet, walking towards the door.
He breathed in the open air, enjoying the feeling of the wind on his face as he walked down the street.
The young shinobi was taken out of his momentarily pleasant reverie when he noticed the perpetual glares sent his way.
It soured the moment instantly.
There they were, as always, the good citizens of Konoha, silently judging and condemning him.
Each and every one of them looked at him like they could see through straight to his soul, and that they'd found it wanting.
He was so sick of it.
Sick of their hateful stares, sick of their cruel, loudly whispered words.
Sick of being their pariah.
Their hatred had been directed at him since before he was old enough to walk on his own two feet.
He picked up his pace.
Naruto sighed as he settled against the base of a tree, hidden away in a training ground.
The sun was setting, and it turned the sky a brilliant orange color.
It was a beautiful sight, and yet it only amplified the unsatisfied melancholy in his chest.
He was finding it harder and harder to appreciate the little things these days.
'I just...don't even really know what to do with myself lately.'
The days had become a repetitive, punishing grind, and they were beginning to blur together.
Every morning he struggled to find a reason to crawl out of bed and face the day.
He could barely remember the last time he was happy.
'I can't even remember the last time i smiled and meant it.'
Naruto found himself looking to the past, remembering and longing for times that hadn't been easy themselves, but felt like paradise compared to the present.
'Hell, I'm like some old man now, pining for days gone by.'
A leaf from the tree overhead fluttering to the ground caught his attention, not green and vibrant like the rest, but a burnt brown color, baked in the heat of the day.
'I just...wish life didn't feel so bleak.'
'People are what make life worth living, right? And...i don't have many of those anymore...'
That time he was pining for had just as much pain and heartache as the days he was living in now, but people, his friends,...the only family he'd ever had, they were what had made those older days easier, what had made them bearable.
'Now they've all just...drifted away.'
And making new friends was hard, especially in a village full of people who hated his guts.
'But really...i don't want to make new friends...i just want the ones I had back.'
He let his head fall back against the bark tiredly, staring into the orange horizon.
'I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. I think...this loneliness might just kill me...'
Street lights buzzed to life as Naruto made his way back to his apartment, the streets emptier now that the sun had set.
"Naruto!"
He turned at the sound of his name, eyebrows raising at the sight of who'd said it.
"Sakura?"
Short pink hair moving messily as she jogged up to him, Sakura grinned.
The pretty green of her eyes lit up under the street lamp stunned him for a moment. It'd been a while since he'd seen them up close.
Her emerald irises brought back memories of the years he'd had a massive crush on her, before his attentions had turned...elsewhere.
"Hey, Naruto! What are you doing out here this late?"
"Uhh, I was about to ask you the same thing."
"Oh, I'm having dinner with some friends from the hospital, at that new restaurant that opened up over there."
Naruto's eyes followed to where her finger was pointing, bright neon sign unmissable.
"I saw you through the window, and I wanted to come say hi and ask..."
She paused, a playful smile on her lips.
'Is she gonna invite me to hang out with them?'
A tiny sliver of hope bloomed in his chest at the thought, though fear grew alongside it as well.
'I'm not a great conversationalist, especially with people I don't know. What if I say something stupid?'
"You haven't forgotten Kakashi-Sensei's training session tomorrow, right?"
The small bloom died quickly, and painfully.
"Uh, yeah. Yeah, I haven't forgotten. I'll be there."
Naruto offered up a weak grin with his words, and the smile on Sakura's face dimmed a bit.
"Are you feeling okay, Naruto?"
'She always was best at seeing through these false smiles.'
"Yeah, I'm good. Just, a little tired, is all."
She looked him over suspiciously, but seemed mostly satisfied with his answer.
"Okay, well, as long as you think you're alright..."
"I'm fine, Sakura. I promise."
He put a little more effort into his next brittle grin.
She returned it with something more genuine than his had been in a long time.
"Good! Make sure you get plenty of sleep tonight, then. You'll need to be rested up for tomorrow."
"I'll do my best."
"Alright, I should get back before they decide to start eating my food for me."
She called over her shoulder with a wave after she'd turned back to walk towards the restaurant.
"Have a good night, Naruto! See you tomorrow."
He wasn't sure if she heard his quiet response.
"Good night, Sakura. Have fun."
He turned around and resumed the walk to his apartment.
Naruto stared at the darkened ceiling from his spot in bed.
The blazing heat of the day was gone, replaced by the uncomfortable mugginess of night.
He looked over at the alarm clock beside his bed, "2:47 AM" glowing in the dark.
'I think it's going to be a long night.'
Naruto trudged forward in the heat, shoes dragging on the ground.
The Team 7 meeting spot came into view, two sets of well-groomed hair visible on the bridge from a distance, cherry-blossom pink and inky black, unlike his own messy blond.
Sakura waved and smiled as she saw him.
"Naruto! You're a little late. I guess you must've slept in, huh?"
He scratched at the back of his neck with a nervous chuckle.
"Yeah, something like that."
Actually, he'd barely gotten an hour of broken sleep throughout the night, and had spent the morning pulling his appearance as well as his brain into shape, so that maybe he'd have a chance at getting through the day's training without passing out or making a total fool of himself.
Sasuke didn't even turn to look at Naruto when he spoke, droll sarcasm carrying across the bridge.
"Kakashi's bad habits rubbing off on you, loser?"
Naruto racked his tired brain trying to think of a good comeback, but he blanked. By the time anything half-decent had come to mind, too much time had passed to use it.
He appreciated Sakura breaking the awkward, post-insult silence.
"Maybe try not to be such a jerk today, okay Sasuke?"
"Tch."
Sakura, like most everyone else they knew, treated Sasuke a bit differently after The Incident.
Naruto watched Sasuke's back as he looked out over the bridge.
Once, what seemed like forever ago to Naruto, their bickering had been playful, even friendly on good days.
'But those days are gone.'
Sasuke still hadn't, and probably never would, forgive him for what'd happened.
'I thought that by dragging him back, I was saving him. I didn't want to lose him. But even though I stopped him from leaving, I still lost him that day.'
He remembered the silence afterwards.
Sneaking from his own hospital room into Sasuke's whenever he was able, talking desperately at Sasuke, asking why, asking so many questions, offering his own reasons, doing everything he could to explain.
And through it all, Sasuke didn't speak to him. Didn't even look at him.
He acted as if Naruto wasn't even there at all, and that was what had hurt the most.
Naruto had begged for him to speak, to tell him what he was feeling, to acknowledge him even the slightest bit.
Naruto had thought that nothing Sasuke would say could hurt more than being ignored.
'But I was...so, so very wrong.'
Sasuke's eyes were such a pretty color.
Naruto had always enjoyed having them on himself, those dark intelligent eyes watching him, as a nuisance, as a rival, as...a friend.
He would never forget the look in Sasuke's eyes that day.
When Sasuke finally looked at him again, Naruto saw.
He saw the pain, the rage, and the absolute hatred in Sasuke's eyes that day...
He remembered the tears that spilled out of Sasuke's eyes, and the words that spilled out of his mouth.
"You have no idea, do you?! How could you! You don't know what it's like to have a family, and to have it ripped away from you!! I would do anything to avenge that wrong, anything!! No matter the cost."
His heart throbbed at seeing Sasuke in pain, his knees wobbling as Sasuke directed the entirety of such intense emotions at him, and Naruto wanted so badly to look away, but he felt pinned to the spot by those eyes, filled with hate and agony.
"I don't regret trying to leave. I don't regret trying to avenge my family. The only thing i regret about that day...is that I wasn't strong enough to kill you."
Naruto's hand clamping down over his own mouth had been the only thing that stopped the devastated sob desperately trying to force itself out of his throat, as tears slipped out of his eyes and crawled down his fingers.
After that, nothing between Sasuke and he was the same.
The playful bickering turned into cruel insults, and it became clear that their friendship was shattered beyond repair, and Naruto's heart along with it.
Sakura's fingers snapping in front of his face pulled him out of his stroll down memory lane.
"Hey, you sure you're okay, Naruto?"
"Yeah, yeah, just lost in a daydream, sorry."
Her eyes had taken on that suspicious glean again.
"So, uh, how was your dinner with friends last night?"
She didn't look impressed at the blatant subject change, but answered regardless.
"It was good, nice to hang out with them when we weren't busy running around at the hospital."
"Good, that's good. I'm glad it was nice."
She nodded, and then there was an awkward moment of silence again.
Sakura opened her mouth to speak, but stopped at the sound of their sensei's voice.
"Hello, my adorable students."
Their sensei looked the same as ever as he stepped onto the bridge, mask and slanted headband firmly in place, dog eared copy of Icha Icha Paradise peaking out of his pocket.
"It's been a while, you're all looking...well."
His lone visible eye paused over Naruto when he said the last part.
"How are you all feeling this morning?"
Before Sakura or Naruto had a chance to reply, Sasuke's agitated monotone got out first.
"Can we skip the pleasantries and just do this already?"
Kakashi's smirk was visible through his mask.
"My my, so impatient, Sasuke."
Sasuke apparently felt his unamused stare was reply enough.
Kakashi's smirk widened underneath his mask.
"Fine, let's get started. We need to make sure we're prepared to handle the next mission that comes our way. I haven't seen any of you in action lately, so, try and impress me. We'll do some training drills first."
Naruto fought the strong urge to yawn.
Naruto took a deep breath, wincing as sweat dripped into his eyes.
Beside him, Sakura and Sasuke wore the results of a day training in the summer heat, shirts sweat-soaked and breathing heavy.
Kakashi looked on from his shady spot beneath a tree.
Naruto felt the vague desire to strangle him.
"Well done, everyone. It looks like you've all done a good job of keeping your skills sharp in between missions. Now, for the next item of the day, a spar."
Naruto palmed his aching side with a grimace.
'Damn, I'm almost out of shape. I don't know if I've got any juice left for a spar.'
Kakashi spoke, eye roving over Naruto's disheveled, wobbly form.
"How about you sit this one out, Naruto? You're looking pretty exhausted."
Naruto took a moment to contemplate it, letting his breathing even out.
The idea of sitting out a spar made his brain itch, but he was worn down to the bone.
Sasuke piped up before he could decide.
"No way. If he's going to be watching my back on a mission, i want to make sure he's still competent enough to do it."
Naruto felt a spark of anger at that, but Sakura replied before he could lob an insult.
"Oh please. You don't care about that, you just want to fight Naruto."
Sasuke didn't miss a beat before he responded.
"I can accomplish two things at once, can't I?
Naruto stepped forward.
"Alright, let's do it. But just so you know, I'm gonna kick your ass."
Sasuke smirked.
Naruto and Sasuke squared off, a few feet apart from one another.
Sasuke looked confident, even more so than usual.
It really did piss Naruto off.
He moved in first, lashing out with a strike, Sasuke dodging easily.
Naruto threw a kick, and Sasuke dodged again, flashing a cocky smirk as he slipped out of the way quickly.
Naruto swung wildly with a left, and Sasuke caught his wrist.
Sasuke's smirk turned into a grin.
'Shit!'
Naruto shouted as his arm was twisted up behind him.
He tried to drive his other elbow into Sasuke's ribs, but it was caught too.
Naruto struggled to get free, but Sasuke's grip was tight and unbudging.
He flinched when Sasuke leaned in to whisper in his ear.
"Just so you know, you couldn't kick my ass on one of your best days, and from the look of you, I'd say this definitely isn't one of those."
Naruto trembled with anger.
Old words rang out in his head.
"Idiot. You were born worthless, and you'll die worthless, no matter how hard you try. Nothing can change that."
This, Sasuke behind him, whispering breathily in his ear, a cruel mockery of his old fantasies.
Naruto threw his head back as hard as he could, the back of his skull slamming into Sasuke's nose.
His grip loosened and he stumbled back, blood spilling out of his nose.
Naruto turned to watch him, seeing the blood trickle past his lips, and that handsome face twisting in rage.
'That's right, come on, Sasuke.'
Sasuke sprinted towards him recklessly, and Naruto leaned out of the way as he came by, hooking his arm under Sasuke's and wrenching it.
Sasuke hollered out in pain, bending over to ease the pressure on his arm.
"What was that you were saying about me not being able to kick your ass?"
Sasuke growled and yanked forward, pulling Naruto off balance, then he spun and slammed the point of his elbow into Naruto's face.
The hit dropped him to his knees.
Sasuke tackled him the rest of the way down to the ground.
They both flailed, trying to tear each other to shreds.
"Hey! That's enough!"
Kakashi's shout didn't phase them.
Naruto grabbed a handful of Sasuke's hair and yanked.
Sasuke returned in kind.
Kakashi hooked a hand into each of their shirt collars, yanking them apart and pulling them to their feet.
"I said that's enough! Now both of you calm down."
Sasuke clutched at his bloody nose, and Naruto wobbled unsteadily.
Naruto gave Sasuke a wink.
The Uchiha and the Uzumaki threw themselves at each other again, Kakashi struggling to hold them back.
"Boys! Stop it!!"
Naruto quit flailing when he felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist, lifting him off the ground easily.
"Whoa, hey!"
"Calm yourself down, Naruto."
Sakura's tone was exasperated, like that of a parent dealing with an unruly child
Naruto watched as Kakashi finally wrangled Sasuke, leading him away to the other side of the field.
Sakura's grip on him was surprisingly tight and steady.
"Okay, you uh, wanna...let me down now? Please?"
Naruto winced when Sakura touched the disinfectant soaked cotton ball to his busted lip.
She spoke without taking her eyes off her task.
"So, what's the deal? You two haven't gone after each other with that much venom in a while."
"Eh, I donno. He must've just woken up on the wrong side of the bed or something."
Sakura raised a withering eyebrow.
"Doesn't look like he was the only one..."
"...he started it."
"And so you had to finish it, right?"
Naruto apologized with a sigh.
"Sorry, Sakura."
She mumbled under her breath loud enough for him to hear.
"Just like little kids, i swear."
Kakashi walked up to them, exasperation obvious even through his mask.
"Since you and Sasuke have apparently decided to try and murder each other today, I believe it's best we postpone the rest of our training for tomorrow."
Sakura rolled her eyes at Naruto and let out a weary sigh at Kakashi's news.
"Great. Another day of training."
Kakashi placated her.
"Don't worry, Sakura. The training I have planned for tomorrow shouldn't take long at all. Just be here bright and early, and we'll be done in a jiff."
Sakura took notice of the sun beginning to set.
"Well, I should get back home and get some rest if we're going at it early then."
She narrowed her eyes at Kakashi.
"So I'll see you there, bright and early, right, Kakashi-Sensei?"
Their sensei's eye wrinkled with a smile.
"Of course."
Sakura's disbelieving noise said otherwise.
"Okay, have a good night, Naruto. Ice that lip!"
She gathered her things and set off walking towards the edge of the training ground.
"What? Your dedicated sensei doesn't get a good night?"
She aimed a sarcastic wave back at Kakashi.
Their little back and forth was something that once would have had Naruto giggling, but now, the fact that it failed to tempt even the smallest of smiles made him feel that much more hollow.
'I'm just...so fucking tired. Not just my body...tired in my mind...tired in my heart.'
The exhaustion he was feeling wasn't the kind that could be cured with sleep.
He'd almost forgotten Kakashi was still standing there while he lost himself in thought.
"I'm heading out too, Naruto. You should get back home too, and get some rest. You'll need it for tomorrow."
Kakashi's hand clapped down on his shoulder, settling firmly for a moment.
Naruto looked up at his sensei, Kakashi's eye shining warmer than it had a moment ago.
"Have a good night, kid."
"Sure thing, Sensei."
Kakashi stepped back and turned away with a wave.
He watched Kakashi's back as he walked off, eyes being drawn to the other remaining member of their team at the edge of the training ground.
Sasuke stood there, shoulders tight, hands in his pockets.
Naruto could just barely make out his face, expression drawn up in a pout.
A tangled ball of emotions that Naruto didn't want to decipher lurched in his gut at the sight of the Uchiha.
He shook his head and dragged his hands down his face.
"Fuck my life."
Naruto barely had the energy to strip off his sweat-dampened shirt and shake off his sandals before he crawled into bed.
The springs on the worn-out mattress dug into his back as they always did, but he was too tired to care.
He passed out moments after his head hit the pillow.
