I also wanted to write some things that Rafael is discovering about a family-centered life, like how he has time to leisurely enjoy a silent walk with Olivia and Noah, etc. Still in the process of coming up with better ideas on that front but I like the premise. I'm still using all of your suggestions (or plan on using), so thank you! This kind of felt flat to me, but that's probably only because I didn't work hard to make my characters miserable, which is still pretty new to me.

THE NEXT CHAPTER IS WHEN AMANDA AND SONNY COME OVER (NIGHTTIME) and finding out that Joe survived. Sorry but I didn't want to put it in this one, this is just Barson and Noah fluff only (plus a scare or two bc apparently Idk how to write happiness).


Day 4: The Battery

Rafael, now aware of Olivia's entrance to the waiting room, pried one of his arms away from Noah's sleepy grasp so that he could start to clean up the array of toys scattered across the bench.

Olivia hurried over with a light tread. "No, no, I got it. Hopefully, he'll nap for a bit." She haphazardly stashed the Paw Patrol figures in her purse along with Noah's small iPad, all while gazing at the peaceful scene beside her. Careful not to excite the only half-resting toddler, their movements were gentle and fluid with very little excess noise.

Although the parking lot was only two blocks away, their walk to the car was slow – Olivia specifically instructed him to try to soothe Noah to sleep – and the lawyer thought that this was the first time in a long time that he had leisurely walked (strutting doesn't count) with no purpose. At first, it bothered him, as some unfamiliar things do, but he soon found comfort in their silent peace. The group moved out of the way and stayed close to the buildings as they passed, out of politeness to all the other New Yorkers who walked quickly, and Rafael found that he had time to look in all the shop windows. Despite his curiosity and slight disturbance at a bookstore promoting a display of their prized anthropodermic book, his eyes mainly focused on both of his companions. Noah's toddler-sized body curled into his chest as he set a steady rhythm, and Rafael couldn't help but smile when the boy's thumb subconsciously found his mouth. When Olivia frowned at the bad habit and bit her lip to prevent her automatic verbal correction, Rafael's chuckles caused Noah to open his eyes momentarily. Luckily, after assessing the situation and determining that he wasn't missing out on anything, he drifted back into a state of semi-sleep.

Olivia matched Rafael's speed but seemingly got closer and closer as they walked until their shoulders gently touched with each step. Mentally blaming the chilly breeze, she kept the contact when they stopped at a crosswalk and moved to gently rub Noah's back until they were signaled to cross. The half-dozen people gathered with them, however, began disrupting her casual peace with their innocently suffocating presence. As Olivia treaded over the white paint and asphalt, her breathing quickened with each well-dressed person that brushed past. Although her nerves largely resulted from not knowing what was behind her, Olivia refused to validate her paranoia by turning her head. Aware that her concerns were unfounded, and somewhat ashamed of them as a result, Olivia tried to calm down with breathing exercises as she moved closer into Rafael.

Not slow to notice these types of things, Rafael maneuvered closely behind her, enough so that she could feel protected but still somewhat beside her so that she could see him and her son. By the time they had crossed to the other side, her momentary fears were quelled.

Still, Rafael silently led her over to an uncrowded area near the closed outside section of a café. He still held her close and spoke softly. "Are you okay?" Even though he knew she didn't usually respond honestly to this question, he hoped that their newfound levels of trust might enable a deeper conversation.

Olivia caught her breath, luckily the adrenaline spike was small, before she responded. "I'm fine now. It was just...", she motioned to all the people walking the adjacent sidewalk, "I just have to remember to tell Lindstrom that close crowds could be a potential new trigger."

Still inquisitive, he kept his voice low as not to disturb Noah as they slowly approached the almost people-less parking garage. "When do you see him again?"

This time, her response was automatic without any trace of the previous scare. "Three days. Thursday."

He just nodded, but Olivia could almost hear the metal clank of the gears turning in his head. Besides, the dark solemnity of the garage, even on such a nice day, was ruining the overwhelmingly relieving sense of calm that she felt only moments earlier.

"Wait". Her counterpart stopped suddenly, concerned for her well-being. "Battery Park is only another block from here. Some fresh air might do us good."

Rafael sensed that there was something else to her random desire to go for a walk, but he agreed with the sentiment. As they reversed directions and headed out to retrace their steps, Rafael decided that Noah was now asleep enough that the little boy wouldn't be roused by their normal voices. The sounds of New York City, albeit a quiet and upscale section of the city, hadn't wakened him, anyway.

To spark a conversation – the concept of a peacefully quiet leisure walk was a new wonder, but he sensed that Olivia wanted to keep her mind off something – he stated the obvious. "It's a rather far commute to make weekly. Battery Park isn't too close to Manhattan."

Oh. So, they did know that she went to therapy every Friday, or at least he did. "Only thirty minutes." Olivia remembered what Lindstrom said about being embarrassed, so she played it off nonchalantly. "Like most therapists, he alternates between two offices. One here and one closer to my apartment. It just so happened that my emergency appointment was scheduled for one of the weekdays that he works here."

"I see." Rafael felt her move away, just by a few inches, but he couldn't help but speculate that his question was too sensitive.

Fortunately, Olivia sensed this. "It's just... sometimes physical contact is very comforting and sometimes... sometimes it feels like I need to just wrap myself up in my own little cocoon with a sign that says, "Do Not Touch" Recently it seems to flip like a switch with no in-between".

This didn't exactly make Rafael feel better about the situation, knowing that he caused her even the slightest discomfort because of his desire to be close to her sickened him, but he did regroup and move forward. "If... uh, you ever feel like you need time to be alone, just tell me. I'll never be offended, Liv."

She smiled and glanced out at the sparkling water. "I know." When she stopped to silently lead them over to the metal rails and watch the breezy swells, she almost warned Noah about touching the tiny amounts of exposed rust before she remembered that he was soundly sleeping. "I can carry him. I know he gets heavy to hold after a while."

Rafael took a moment to assess her offer. Either she was asking to be polite, or the growing ache of his muscles was a cover to ask for her son back. Deciding that it was safer to assume the latter, he gently transferred the resting toddler from his arms to hers. "It's really nice. When he... uh... leans against you like an overgrown baby."

Watching Barba stumble over his words was a rarity, one that she only saw when he navigated through unfamiliar territory, and she did not take it for granted. Feeling guilty for enjoying his uncertainty, she smiled and moved to hold her son closer. "It is." Noah's hair raised as she ran her hand through it. "One day my baby boy is going to be too big to pick up."

"You have a long time until then."

He smiled when her face glowed with mirth. "Says the man who'll be able to carry him when he's ten."

Rafael couldn't decide which implication of the sentence he should focus on. He could take it as a semi-compliment to his strength or could focus on the fact that Olivia planned on keeping him around for at least another 7 years. As friends or... something more? As he chastised himself for the selfish and misplaced thought, Olivia saw his features harden.

"You okay?" Her concerned look was replaced quickly with one of joy as his own face did the same.

Rafael took a moment to listen to the water softly slap against the brick. To watch Noah subconsciously wrap his adorably tiny hands around his mother's neck. To see the peacefulness of Olivia's features as the sun softly illuminated them from above. "I'm... perfect."

Before Olivia had the chance to respond – her head was brimming with clichés, after all, it was now or never if she wanted to be like those rom-com characters she loved in her teenage years – Noah stirred. The caring mother was torn between letting him rest and enjoying his lively presence, but he decided for her.

"Mommy?" His tired voice was adorable, even though his face scrunched up and his speech was muffled by his desire to be close to his mother.

She turned her body so that it was blocking the sun. "Yes, love?"

The new shade prompted the little boy's eyes to close on their own accord, even though Noah was reluctant to miss out on anything. "Where we?"

"We're taking a walk with Rafael."

"Playground?" His eyes opened a little wider.

"Not here, sweetheart. There will be one coming up, but right now we are just walking by the water. This park is a little different than Central Park." Olivia repositioned her body once more and pointed out towards the glistening swells and far-away cargo ships. Rafael laughed when Noah's eyes shot open to stare at the boats.

"Raffle?"

"I'm sorry?" Olivia moved to look Noah in the eye; she always liked to watch his mouth move to try and decipher what the boy meant. Usually, he fixed his speech on the second try, but, like all toddlers, sometimes he needed extra help for people to comprehend his meaning. "Can you try again love?"

"Where Raffle?

When she realized that he was referring to Rafael, Olivia barely laughed because she was too busy feeling her heart melt. The honey-warmth of her chest spread out to her arms as the cuteness of the situation overloaded her senses. Usually, Noah referred to him as "Uncle Rafa" or "Mista Barba", both of which were adorable in their own right, but this one took the cake.

"I'm right here, bud." Rafael was also grinning, but Olivia had a hard time making eye contact as he couldn't seem to take his eyes off the young boy.

"You pay wiff me again?"

"Of course!" Remembering that Olivia wanted Noah to practice learning in recreational settings and that Noah loved ships, Rafael had an idea. "But first...", he let the suspense build up in an overdramatic fashion, "you have to pass a test!"

Noah writhed in his mother's arms. "No!", he whined in an equally dramatic tone. After seeing that his friend wouldn't budge, the tired toddler decided to relent. "kay, I take test. Then we pay togever."

Olivia carefully passed the wiggling toddler back to Rafael, who immediately turned to face the water. "Hmmm... how many ships are there?"

"Big ships!"

"I know! They're so big!" Rafael pointed to each one and helped Noah count as he noticed Olivia trying to covertly take some photos. "One, two, three." they counted at the same time.

"Mommy! They got free ships!"

Olivia, put her phone away as she responded. "They have three ships? No way."

Rafael realized something just then: whenever Noah made a grammar or speech error that Olivia understood, she echoed it back to him in the form of a question so that he'd hear the correct version. Huh. He'd have to remember to do that.

"I pass test?"

"With flying colors, conejito!"

Noah maneuvered so that he could hit the older man's hand for a high-five. "What we pay now?

"What are we going to play now?", Rafael grinned as he expertly used Olivia's trick, "I don't know. It's up to you."

"We walk to playground," Noah paused to weigh his options carefully, "then you pay wiff me. Okay, Raffle?"

This time, Olivia cut in. "Let's check how far it is, then we'll go. We don't want to get lost." After pulling out her phone, and dismissing Noah's enthusiastic cry for video games, she turned to Rafael.

"It's about a fifteen-minute walk." Olivia put her phone in her back pocket instead of her purse, as she figured that she'd soon pull it out for pictures. The view of Rafael throwing Noah in the air, as per his request, confirmed that suspicion. She warned them to be careful before directing them towards the playground.

Their pace was slow, even slower than before, as Noah stopped to point at things along the path. Soon, Rafael added some light conversation. Olivia found that she didn't actually mind being a third wheel of sorts, because that only meant that she got to see her two favorite boys getting along. More than "getting along", actually. Their dynamic was friendly, educational, and caring. Despite his unfamiliarity with children and his initial hesitation, Rafael was quickly warming up to Noah and vice versa.

After taking a photo from behind of Rafael carrying Noah, she caught up with them just in time for a history lesson.

"Did you know that this place isn't actually called Battery Park anymore?" Rafael paused to watch Noah's head whip around, more enthusiastically than necessary, to form a no. "It's actually just called The Battery now, and Battery Park is actually a subway station."

"Why they call it park then?"

"I don't know."

Rafael was startled when Olivia approached from behind, chucking. "Mark your calender, Noah. Rafael Barba just admitted he doesn't know everything."

Coming from somebody else, he might have responded with a semi-offended sarcastic remark. But this was Olivia, and her joke had the perfect mixture of jest and exaggeration. "Yeah, Yeah," he said to Noah while waving her off, which the boy found much funnier than expected, "But guess what I do know?"

Noah jumped, or at least moved his body a little, in excitement. "What?"

"Guess what's under the water?"

"Fishes!"

"Well, yes, fish are there too. But the Hudson River also has tunnels."

"Tunnels! Like mole from 'credibles!"

"Like the mole from Incredibles!" Rafael was thankful that most of Noah's enthusiasm could be stoked by dramatic reactions and repeating what he just said because he had never seen The Incredibles. Or most children's movies, for that matter. Maybe he should watch some. For research, of course, and definitely not because he secretly loved happy endings.

"What it called?"

"The Holland Tunnel. You've been in it plenty of times, I bet."

"Plenty time. For sure."

"For sure," he echoed back.

Rafael, Noah, and Olivia continued walking. Their "fifteen-minute walk" turned out to be about double that, as Noah wanted to be let down so he could walk in between his two favorite adults. When he held both of their hands, Olivia got an idea.

"Hold on to us, and when we count to three, you jump."

Noah gave his mother a quizzical look but obeyed his instructions out of curiosity. After the first swing, he fell in love with it.

"More! More!" Noah pulled on both of their hands by squatting and jumping, but Olivia and Rafael could only watch in amusement as he pleaded to fly again.

After many swings and multiple bouts of hysterical laughter, both adults were too tired to continue and decided to take a break. Noah was not happy with their decision – he started to pout immediately upon hearing, "We need a break, conejito!" – but was sated with the promise that the playground was coming up.

"Wow," Olivia huffed, catching her breath, "He really liked that."

"It looked like you loved it just as much as he did."

She hadn't done the swinging thing before. She'd seen it in some rom coms, and watched young couples do the same, but Olivia didn't have anyone to hold Noah on the other side. She didn't have a father figure for her son. She didn't have someone to balance her out. Until now. Sure, Carisi or Rollins might have volunteered, but only Rafael completed the puzzle. "I did. I loved it."

Sensing that she was talking to herself as much as she was talking to him, Rafael decided to stay quiet and enjoy the peace of walking together with Noah and Olivia.

When they finally arrived at their destination, at least fifteen minutes behind schedule, Noah let go of both hands.

"It red and blue, Raffle!" Noah turned to tell his mother the important color of the metal as well, blurring the picture that she just took. "Like Opimus!"

"That's right, love! Just like Optimus Prime!" Unfortunately, Noah had already started to run to the toddler-sized slide and didn't hear her confirmation.

Rafael and Olivia made their way over to the playground at a leisurely pace, giving Noah some space but also watching close enough to satisfy Olivia's overprotective tendencies.

"He likes Transformers?" Rafael made a mental note to pick up some toys to give to Noah. It's not like he needed to bribe for Noah's affections, but Rafael was secretly insecure about how much the toddler really liked him. The fierce lawyer wasn't a child-whisperer by far and was almost pathetically useless with Noah at first. In fact, he had once googled "how to get a child to like you" in an attempt to impress Olivia but closed out the tab before he felt the resulting pathetic-ness. Now, though, he was forming a growing affection for the little boy.

"Yeah, especially Bumblebee" She twiddled her fingers while watching her son play by himself on the see-saw. "I think I'm going to get him a Transformers costume for Halloween."

"I think the more important question is what are you going to be?" If they were having this conversation under different circumstances, he might tease her about the thought of Olivia Benson in a sexy kitty outfit. Maybe a nurse. But, alas, this was no time to talk or tease about those topics. They had agreed to be friends first, especially now, and Rafael was determined to maintain that promise. "You could be... wait for it... a police officer."

Olivia audibly chucked. "I'd get points for the authenticity of the uniform." She maintained her focus on her son but tilted her head towards Rafael ever so slightly. "And what about you, Counselor?"

"I'd chose the easy way out. Just put some paint on a big piece of cardboard and draw some lines." Rafael's smile grew as Olivia looked confused; he knew that his shitty joke would be even worse now that there was a buildup. "I'd be a Raffle ticket."

Olivia turned to look at him as she laughed, and he felt a keen sense of accomplishment. "Ah, so you like your new name?"

"Mami would have a heart attack if she heard that Noah christened me as Mista Raffle Barbara."

She jokingly bumped into his shoulder. "You didn't answer the question, Counselor."

He felt his cheeks redden as he looked straight ahead. "Perhaps, Lieutenant." He found it adorable and they both knew it.

"Whatever you say." Olivia linked her free arm with his – this type of physical contact was great; Olivia felt as if she was touching rather than being touched and it was easy to pull away if her mood changed – and continued watching. "You're going to miss it when he's older, though."

Rafael decided not to press on the implication of his long-term presence after he decided that Olivia must not have noticed the full meaning of what she said. He watched Noah rush to claim the newly available swing by putting his hands on it and chuckled as the little boy looked around to make sure that no one else would take it. "Definitely."