Chapter 13 – A Thousand Words
I should not have forgotten the pictures. They hold within their lines more truth than words can express.
Valinor
Fourth Age
Erestor stood silent through it all. He listened to the king's proposal. He listened to Finarfin and to Elrond and to his daughter, as well. And when all finally fell silent and turned their eyes on him he had but one thing to say.
"No."
"Ada …" Eruanna began but she was cut off.
"I forbid it," he said, lightly suppressed anger clear in his trembling voice and narrowed eyes.
Elrond stepped forward, hoping to offer the child assistance. "Erestor," he said.
But Erestor ignored him, and surprised them all as he rounded on Fingolfin, unleashing the whole of his fury on his new lord and king. "You think because the Eldar have forgiven your crimes that he deserves the same. I tell you now, it will … not … happen!" He turned then and fled the king's audience chamber leaving those behind in a state of shock.
"Ada," Eruanna cried when words finally returned to her. She started after him, but a hand stopped her.
Fingolfin took Eruanna by the arm as she passed. "No," he said. "Let him go. He needs time."
Eruanna paced nervously about her bedchamber while her mother sat on the edge of the bed, trying her best to comfort her.
"You should have seen him shout at the king, naneth." Eruanna wrung her hands. This was all her fault. She knew the king's idea would upset him. She had told him so. But Fingolfin and Elrond had assured her they would approach Erestor with care. They had, but it had not mattered in the end.
"He is afraid," Irimë said, quietly.
"I know," she replied. But afraid of what, exactly, was what Eruanna wished to know. He had told her before that he feared for her safety, but Eruanna knew there was more to it than that. The memories that Maglor awakened in Erestor had such a powerful hold on his soul. Eruanna knew how vivid such painful memories could be. She had captured some of her own with paper and ink, with paper and ink…
Eruanna flew from the room.
"Eruanna!" Irimë shouted and followed close on the younger elleth's heels. "Where are we going?" she asked, when she finally caught up with her.
"To the library."
The whole of Elrond's library was housed in the same wing as their quarters and it took only a few moments to arrive there. Eruanna oriented herself to the layout and pulled a large book from a high shelf.
"What is that?" Irimë asked.
Eruanna laid the book out on a reading table. "The first book in Quenya I ever read. It is an account of The Silmarillion, written and illustrated by Erestor. He saw me with it in the library when I first came to Imladris. I liked the pictures, but could not understand the words." She opened the tome and flipped through its pages until she arrived at the page she was searching for – a drawing of Maglor Fëanorion on the banks of the Sirion.
Irimë studied the drawing with a growing sense of unease. "It is a most accurate likeness," she whispered.
Eruanna shut the tome and lifted it into her arms. "I have to find him."
Irimë was not certain that was a good idea, but the desire to help her daughter outweighed her concerns. "I saw Glorfindel earlier," she said. "He told me he had spotted Erestor on the north tower."
Eruanna kissed her mother hurriedly, thankful for her help, and went off in search of her father.
Eruanna found Erestor seated on the balcony of the high tower. When she stepped through the doorway and out into the sunlight he pulled his eyes off the horizon and turned his attention to her. They stared at one another in silence and Eruanna used the time to gauge her father's mood. There was no anger remaining in his eyes – only a mixture of pain and shame.
Erestor was the first to look away. "I can not believe I spoke that way to the king," he said.
Eruanna took a seat by his side, using the time it took to cover the distance to decide what she would say. "I am certain he feels the same way," she said softly.
Erestor leaned over and rested his head in his hands. It seemed to Eruanna as if he would weep, but he made no sound, only hid his face from sight.
Eruanna clutched the book tighter against her chest. She did not want to upset her father further, she wanted to help him. But as Glorfindel told her once long ago, sometimes a bone must be broken if it is to be properly set. She was no Glorfindel, but she loved Erestor and wanted to see his soul put aright.
"Do you want to know how I knew him?" she asked.
"Knew who?" he said without lifting his head.
"Maglor … when he arrived at the ship."
Erestor straightened then, and met her gaze with curious eyes. "How?"
"I recognized his face from an illustration," she said, and laid his book on her lap. She opened it to the proper page and stared down at the image of Maglor, his face and armor stained with blood. "It is a startling likeness," she said, softly. "One might think the ellon who drew it had done so from memory."
Erestor's voice caught in his throat. He was barely able to utter the words, "He did."
Eruanna closed the book and set it aside. She took Erestor's arm in hers and rested her head against his shoulder. "Tell me," she whispered.
Erestor's fist rose to his lips. The very idea of speaking … of telling anyone the tale behind this drawing made him ill. He had spoken with Glorfindel once, but that was different, and he had not shared with him the details of those events. "I have spoken of that day only once before, but have never shared the whole of the tale with anyone."
"Why?" Eruanna asked, conscious of how fragile her father's voice sounded in her ears. "What could be more terrible than what is already written in this book?"
Footnote reminder: Fingolfin killed elves in the first kinslaying. Feanor's people arrived in Alqualonde first, and started the fight, but when Fingolfin's people arrived, they thought the Teleri had attacked Feanor so they jumped into the fray to defend their people. Only later did Fingolfin learn that it was Feanor who began it. Finarfin arrived last after the battle was done. Horrified, he and his people returned to Tirion to beg the Valar's forgiveness. Fingolfin's people followed Feanor, mostly because they feared the Valar's wrath for having committed murder. Fingolfin went too, because he had sworn to be loyal to his older brother and because he did not want to be parted from his people.
