Chapter 27: Back In Ohio


Kurt held his breath as the driver turned onto his street, his eyes wide with panic. The sidewalks were littered with people waiting for them; fans with signs professing their undying love for Blaine, kids from school wearing shocked faces, local paparazzi with their camera's ready, and neighbors pretending to check the mail or attend to their lawns. Kurt had known what to expect. He had known that his house would become a circus and they were the main act. But actually witnessing the madness so close to home made him anxious. How in the hell was he going to survive school?

Kurt felt a gentle squeeze on his thigh and he turned to Blaine, a shaky breath escaping his lips. "Are you ok?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah," Kurt nodded though his voice cracked. "Just a little overwhelmed I guess," he said, looking back outside to see groups of people running towards his house. Their windows were tinted so no one could see them, but everyone knew it was them. Why else would an all-black high class Escalade be driving down their street? "It's different in California. No one knows me there. But here? Seeing all this when I've known these people all my life is a lot to take in."

"I felt the same way the first time we visited Westerville for that wedding," Blaine shared. "It's very surreal to see the people you know act like this."

Kurt took a slow deep breath and nodded. Surreal was an understatement.

The driver slowed down and came to stop once he reached the Hudmel home. The driveway was blocked off and there were five bodyguards waiting for them. Kurt and Blaine could hear the chants and screams from the fans outside as they gathered around the barricades.

"You ready?" Blaine asked.

"As I'll ever be," Kurt sighed.

Blaine smiled softly, giving the driver a nod that they were ready. The moment the driver opened his door, the screams intensified tenfold. He walked to the back of the car and unloaded Kurt's and Blaine's luggage before walking to the passenger side. Kurt stepped out first, smiling at the crowd while they hollered out for him. Blaine followed and the screams turned desperate. Blaine waved and gave them all a toothy charming smile. Together they grabbed their suitcases and walked up the driveway hand in hand. Once they reached the porch, Blaine stopped and turned to them.

"Hey everyone," Blaine shouted. "If you would please give me a little while to get settled, I'll gladly come out to sign autographs and take pictures," the screams in response were deafening. "But after that, I would greatly appreciate it if you all went on your way. It's been a long day and we would really like to get some rest. How does that sound?" The crowd cheered and Blaine smiled. "Thank you!" he waved again and turned to Kurt. "Hopefully that will settle things down."

Kurt nodded with an exhale. "Hopefully."

They walked inside and for the first time in days, Kurt felt himself relax. "Welcome home," Burt said from the hallway, pulling Kurt in for a hug.

Kurt smiled and hugged his father. "Thanks, Dad. It's nice to be home."

Burt let go of Kurt and turned to Blaine. "Come here, son," he smiled. Blaine smiled back and wrapped his arms around Burt in a warm embrace. "Glad to have you back."

"It's good to be back," Blaine said as they parted. "Sorry about all the craziness outside.

Burt waved him off. "It was worse the day you announced Kurt. The phone rang so much I had to disconnect it from the wall," he chuckled though it was completely true. "Go on and get settled. Carole and Finn will be home soon with dinner. We thought about going to Breadstix but we knew we wouldn't get any peace so they picked it up instead."

"Thanks, Dad," Kurt sighed with relief. "All I want to do is lie in bed and not move for the rest of the day," he said, making his way to his room.

"We have traveled a lot the past couple of days," Blaine nodded and followed. "I'll go out to the fans after we eat and you can stay in if you like. Maybe we can watch a movie after?"

Kurt hummed with appreciation, picturing Blaine and he cuddled up with his comforter. "Sounds perfect."


Shortly after dinner, Blaine made his way outside to greet the fans. His announcement that he would sign autographs and take photos must have been passed around because there were twice as many people waiting for him. He didn't mind it too much. He just hoped it didn't become a constant thing. He was going to have to talk to Eric about adding a little more security detail until things settled down.

Kurt watched Blaine from the kitchen window with a smile and cup of cocoa in hand. He loved this side of Blaine, the charismatic superstar who would do anything for his fans. Blaine had once told him that he didn't want Kurt to ignore the famous performer side of him because it was part of who he is, and he couldn't have been more right. Blaine had two personas; the one Kurt and his family were privileged to see, and the performer who charmed the crowd. Kurt was in love with both parts and he would proudly stand by Blaine's side as he signed autographs for the rest of their lives.

"How long do you think he'll be out there?"

Kurt turned to the sound of his father's voice. "Knowing Blaine, probably a while," he smirked. "He will sign every single piece of paper and pose with every single fan before he comes in, guaranteed."

Burt offered a crooked smile. "That soulmate of yours is something else."

Kurt took a sip of his cocoa and sighed happily. "He really is."

Burt sideways glanced at his son. Seeing Kurt happy was the best feeling in the world. He hated that he would have to put a damper on it but he made a promise to his late wife that he needed to keep, no matter how much it may hurt him to do so. "Come here. I have something for you," Burt nodded at Kurt to follow him. Kurt raised a questioning brow but allowed his father to lead him into his home office. Burt grabbed a key from the jar sitting on his desk and opened a drawer. "I've been waiting to give you this," he handed Kurt an envelope that was addressed to him. "It's from your mom. She wrote it before she passed away with the instructions not to give it to you until you've bonded."

Kurt set his cocoa down and held the letter with both hands. "Mom wrote this for me?" he asked just above a whisper.

"Mhm," Burt nodded, walking around the desk. He placed a gentle hand on Kurt's shoulder. "She would've been real proud of you kiddo. I know I certainly am."

"Thanks, Dad," Kurt smiled softly though his eyes were glued to the envelope.

"I'll leave you alone."

Burt walked out of his office and closed the door behind him. Kurt walked to his father's chair and took a seat. With a shaky hand, he carefully ripped the envelope open and began to read it, tears already pooling in his eyes.

My Dearest Kurt,

If you're reading this letter it means that you are now a bonded man. I may not be there to hold you in my arms, but know that I am so very proud of you. Being bonded with your truest love is the most wonderful feeling in the world. I remember when your father and I bonded I was certain that nothing would ever make me happier than I was at the very moment.

I was wrong.

The day I learned I was pregnant with you was my happiest moment. And again when you took your first steps, when you spoke your first word, when you first told you me you loved me. I have a lifetime worth of happiest moments because of you and I will cherish them forever.

I pray that my passing hasn't been too hard on you my son. I've had my time to come to terms with my end, and although it is so much harder now that I have you, I always knew this day would come. I pray that you've found the strength to keep going, to never stop fighting. You are stronger than you know Kurt, I promise you. Do not ever doubt yourself for you will become one of the greats, I'm certain of it.

Cherish the time you have with your family and your soulmate. Love your soulmate with your entire being and remember that no one is perfect. There will be moments where you will be upset with them, where you will want to scream and storm out. It is ok to do so. But never let your differences come between you. Never let your anger simmer for too long. Remember that Fate has chosen this for you because you are more than capable of handling whatever life throws your way together. Love them Kurt, love them deeply, because they will be the most important person in your life.

I love you my dearest Kurt, more than you could possibly know. Thank you for giving me new life and for giving me the opportunity to fulfill my greatest desire, because loving you will always be my biggest accomplishment. Thank you for being my lucky charm.

Love Always, Mommy

Kurt brought the letter to his chest, his heart aching deeply, and cried for his mother in a way he hadn't in years.


An hour later, an exhausted Blaine entered Kurt's room ready for a shower and a movie. But the sight in front of him shook him to the core. Kurt was wrapped in his blanket like a cocoon crying so quietly that Blaine could barely make out the whimpers.

"Kurt?" Blaine whispered, cautiously sitting down on the bed. Kurt didn't even glance up at him. "Sweetheart, what's wrong? What happened?"

Kurt sniffled. "My mom," he spoke shakily. "She wrote me this letter."

Kurt's hand appeared from underneath the blanket with the folded up letter. Blaine took it gingerly, his heart breaking for his beloved as he read it. "Oh Kurt," he said softly.

"It's not fair!" Kurt suddenly exploded. "She was supposed to be here! She was supposed to raise me and be with me when I needed her! She was supposed to know you and see us be happy! It's not fair!"

"Kurt," Blaine reached out for him but Kurt pulled away.

"No!" Kurt shouted, angry tears streaming down his face. "She wasn't supposed to die! She was supposed to have this life full of happiness and love and instead she spent her days slowly deteriorating in the hospital!"

"Baby," Blaine tired but it only angered Kurt more.

"And you! Why haven't you spoken to your dad or at least tried?" Blaine pulled back a little as if he'd just been slapped. "I know that you have problems with him and I know that there's a part of you that's angry with him even though you always say you aren't. But I also know that you miss him even though you don't want to admit it. I know that you wish more than anything that you could have a relationship with him, like I do with my dad. And I just can't understand why you won't try! He's your father, Blaine! And one day he's going to be gone and you'll regret not talking to him!" Kurt took a breath and noticed the pained look on Blaine's face. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry," he cried, throwing his arms around Blaine's neck. Blaine took a deep breath and embraced Kurt. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I'm just so mad because she's not here and she was supposed to be here! She was supposed to be here."

Blaine pulled Kurt to sit on his lap and swayed him, his own tears falling. "It's ok, love. It's going to be ok."

"It's just not fair," Kurt sobbed quietly. "It's not fair."

"You're right, it's not. But it's life, Kurt. Life is never fair," Kurt said nothing, his head snuggling into the crook of Blaine's neck. "And you're right about my father."

"Blaine-"

"Shh," Blaine cut him off. "You had your turn to talk; now it's mine," Kurt lifted his head to look at Blaine. "I am still angry with him and I do miss him. I should talk to him but I'm scared. I'm scared of being rejected all over again only this time it'll somehow be worse. But it's not an excuse to ignore the longing in my heart. It's not an excuse to act as if he doesn't exist because one day he won't and I will regret not trying harder."

Kurt looked away with guilt. "I shouldn't have brought him up, Blaine. I'm sorry."

"It's ok," Blaine assured him. He chose not to be upset with Kurt despite the painful reminder because everything Kurt said was true. He knew that Kurt tended to say things he didn't mean when he was emotional and he refused to fault him for it. "I understand why you did. Your time with your mother was limited and here I am with all the time in the world and I'm wasting it. I'm not upset with you though, I promise."

Kurt nodded and wiped tears away. "I just miss her so much. It's been so long since I've really thought of her and I've been so happy lately that I almost forgot she was gone. Reading her letter brought everything back and now I feel so guilty because I'm so happy and she's not here to see it."

"She wouldn't want you to feel that way, Kurt. You have to know that," Blaine said and Kurt nodded. "It's ok to be happy and to live your life. It's what she would've wanted. And it's ok to miss her still, to cry for her. It's ok to have moments where all you want to do is imagine what life would be like had she still been around. It doesn't make you weak, it makes you human. But never forget that she loved you deeply and that she would've wanted nothing but the best for you."

"I know," Kurt sniffled. "I just miss her so much."

"I know baby, I know," Blaine comforted. "How about we skip the movie tonight and simply cuddle?" he suggested. "You can tell me all your happiest moments with your mom. Or we don't have to talk at all. We can go to sleep if you like."

"Let's just go to sleep," Kurt mumbled. "I'm too tired to deal with any of this right now."

Blaine nodded with understanding and gently pushed Kurt off his lap. Blaine forwent his shower and changed into his pajama bottoms, side eyeing Kurt in case he broke down again. Kurt was silent though as he changed clothes, his head too wrapped up in memories. They slipped under the sheets together and Kurt rested his head on Blaine's chest, his arms wrapping around Blaine's torso. Blaine smiled down at him, embracing Kurt in his arms and kissing the top of his head.

"Will you sing to me?" Kurt's voice was nothing but a whisper.

"Of course, my love. Any requests?" Blaine wondered.

"Something Good from The Sound of Music?" Kurt asked him. "My mom used to sing it all the time. It was her favorite song."

Blaine nodded against his head, kissing him gently before softly singing.

Perhaps I had a wicked childhood

Perhaps I had a miserable youth

But somewhere in my wicked, miserable past

There must have been a moment of truth

For here you are, standing there, loving me

Whether or not you should

So somewhere in my youth or childhood

I must have done something good

Kurt snuggled closer to Blaine, tears welling up in his eyes all over again. He could still clearly see his mother dancing in the living room with him in her arms, singing the song with as much loveliness as Maria. He could still remember his father standing against the entryway with his hands in his pocket watching them with adoration. He could still feel the sadness in his heart from the times she told him she would sing to him later because she was too tired. And yet, despite the heartache and the wish that his mother was still around, being in Blaine's arms, listening to him sing her favorite song, brought an ease to his soul that made the tears stop.

"I love you, always and forever."

Blaine stopped singing and looked down at his love. "I love you too," he whispered. "Always and forever."


Blaine and Kurt were up early the next morning and although they had an emotional evening, Kurt was in high spirits. He had accepted long ago that his mom wouldn't be around to watch him grow into the man he was becoming. Her letter had simply opened an old wound that Kurt knew would never heal and the need to mourn her all over again had been overwhelming.

But today was a new day and he couldn't allow himself to cry for her anymore, at least not yet. He would visit her later in the week and undoubtedly cry all over again. Today however, today was the first Cheerios practice of the New Year and Blaine was coming along with him. Whatever sadness he felt the night before was on the back burner and replaced by excitement. He couldn't wait to show Blaine off to his team.

"Blaine, you ready to go?" Kurt asked with a final spray to his hair. "The girls will be here any minute."

"I'm ready." Kurt turned his head and his jaw dropped, his eyes hungrily taking in Blaine's outfit of choice. He was wearing tight red pants, a fitted black polo, a white knitted belt, and a black, white, red, and gray striped bowtie. Kurt was certain that he was drooling. "I thought I would wear your school colors. Do you like it?" Blaine asked with a spin.

"Do I like it?" Kurt questioned with a raised brow. He walked to Blaine and placed a single finger on his chest. He ran his finger down, pushing back gently so that Blaine stepped backward towards the bed. "I love it," Kurt purred. "You look incredibly sexy."

"Yeah?"

Kurt bit his lower lip and nodded. "Oh yeah," he pushed Blaine back on the bed and straddled him. Kurt placed his hands on Blaine's shoulder, laid him down and started kissing him with fervor. Blaine attempted to get out of Kurt's grasp for only a second before giving in completely, his arms wrapping around Kurt's waist and their hips gyrating against each other.

Santana opened the door without knocking, not in the least bit surprised to find Kurt and Blaine in their current position. "You can suck face later, Hummel. We gotta go. Q's waiting outside. We're taking your car."

Kurt pulled back long enough to breathlessly mutter, "In a minute, Satan." He attached his lips to Blaine's neck and sucked hard, his teeth scraping Blaine's skin.

"Kurt," Blaine meant to sound like he was protesting but it came out like a moan. He knew that Santana was standing a few feet away watching them but he couldn't bring himself out of the Kurt induced haze he was suddenly in.

Santana stood by the door with her hands on her hips waiting. She wasn't sure if Blaine knew what Kurt was doing but she certainly did so she waited patiently, knowing that Kurt wouldn't detach himself until he was satisfied.

After several minutes, Kurt unsealed his lips and sat up. He smiled proudly at the giant hickey on Blaine's neck. "Did you really think that I was going to let you walk into a gymnasium full of fangirls looking like that without marking what's mine?"

Blaine looked at him questioningly, his hand flying up to his neck. He smirked with amusement. "I'm pretty sure that's what our cuffs are for."

Kurt shrugged uncaringly. "This was more fun," he winked. He swung his leg over Blaine, got up, and straightened out his uniform. "Let's go. We're running behind already."

"I wonder whose fault that is," Santana said sarcastically. She took in Blaine's outfit as he stood up and nodded her approval. "You look smoking hot in that, Anderson."

Blaine looked down at his outfit with a raised brow. He didn't think he looked that good. "Should I change? I don't want to bring any unnecessary attention while you guys are trying to practice."

"No!" Kurt and Santana shouted simultaneously.

"You look perfect, babe," Kurt said, straightening out Blaine's bowtie. "Trust me. The girls, and most importantly Sue, are going to love that you wore this."


Santana waited until Kurt was parking the car to tell him about Britney. The SUV with three bodyguards parked next to him. "Oh by the way," she started nonchalantly. "I keep forgetting to tell you that Kitty's little sister is the fan who runs KlainesArmy on twitter."

Kurt whipped his head around. "What? No way!"

"Mhm," Santana nodded. "We found out a few days ago. She's going to be here today and probably freaking the hell out. But not because of Blaine, because of you."

Kurt cursed under his breath. "She probably thinks I'm some bitch with the way Kitty talks about me."

"Who's Kitty?" Blaine asked, unbuckling his seatbelt.

"A sophomore who thinks she can take me down," Kurt rolled his eyes. "But it's whatever; I'm not worried about her. I am worried about Britney though," he said with an eye on the bodyguards who were surveying the area. "I actually really like this girl. She's sweet. I don't want her to fear me."

"That's what we told her," Quinn said. "I'm sure Kitty's been filling her head with bullshit though."

"Alright," Kurt sighed. "I'll just have to make sure to be extra nice to her."

"Kitty's going to love that," Quinn said with an almost evil smirk.

The bodyguards nodded at Kurt and Blaine that it was clear. They all got out of Kurt's car and hurried inside. Kurt told Jeremy, the biggest of the bodyguards, where the entrance door to the gym from inside the school was and he quickly headed that way to block it off. The other two body guards stood by the entrance that led outside.

Kurt, Blaine, Santana, and Quinn were the last to arrive to practice and their entrance was nothing short of dramatic. Santana and Quinn entered first, both wearing smug grins as they walked over to Brittany. Kurt and Blaine followed and the silence surrounding them was deafening. Kurt smiled smugly at the Cheerios that never liked him. It felt good being on top.

"Porcelain," Sue smiled with pride. "My beautiful Porcelain. I'm so happy you're here," she said, grabbing his face and squeezing his cheeks. "It's been way too long since I've seen this face."

Kurt grunted as she pulled away. "What kind of happy drugs do they have you on?" he asked.

Sue merely laughed. "Oh Porcelain, you always know how to make me laugh," Kurt looked at his girls with a raised brow as if to say, Seriously, what the hell has Sue been smoking lately? The girls shrugged. Sue turned to Blaine with a wide smile. "And you must be Blaine, my beautiful Porcelain's soulmate." Before Blaine could answer, Sue was grabbing his face and kissing him. Kurt bit back a laugh at Blaine's horrified face. "Thank you so much for being here and for wearing our colors with such pride," her voice cracked. "It's just so wonderful to see someone of your caliber in my humble home," Sue let out a hushed cry. "Excuse me a moment."

Kurt crossed his arms and shook his head as Sue walked out of the gym. "I think her doctor needs to reduce her hormones."

"No shit," Santana said from the other side of him. "She's weird as hell like this."

"So, she's not normally like this?" Blaine asked them.

"Not at all," Kurt scoffed. "Old Sue would have us dying from running laps right now." Kurt turned to his team and smirked. "Well, since practice has been postponed for the moment," he strut forward and Blaine followed. "Everyone, I'd like to introduce my soulmate, Blaine Anderson."

The Cheerios said hi quietly and Blaine smiled charmingly. "Hello there ladies," he greeted the girls then turned to the other two boy cheerleaders, "gentlemen. Thank you for having me."

The Cheerios muttered that it was no problem at all. Kurt snorted with amusement at his speechless teammates. "Alright, where is she? Where's Britney Wilde?"

"Over here," Britney squeaked from the behind the Cheerios. "H-hi."

Kurt smiled brightly at her. "Hi! Don't be shy, get over here!" Britney hurried to his side. "I cannot tell you how excited I am that you're here!"

Britney's eyes went wide. "Really?"

"Of course!" Kurt assured her. "You're the captain of our ship after all," Britney blushed a crimson red as Kurt put his arm around her. "Britney, meet Blaine."

"H-hi."

"Hey," Blaine smiled.

"Brit, do you think you could keep Blaine company on the bleachers while we practice?"

"Absolutely!" Britney squealed. "Yes, totally. I can totally do that."

"Awesome. Now why don't you two sit over here," Kurt guided them to the front of the bleachers, "and enjoy the show," he winked. He kissed Blaine chastely then ran over to his team.

Blaine looked at the shell shocked young girl and grinned. "Have you seen them perform?"

It took Britney a minute to grasp the fact that her idol was talking to her and when she did, she nodded frantically. "Yeah," she said enthusiastically. "They're amazing! State Champs and everything you know! His Royal Highness, I mean Kurt, and his girls, The Unholy Trinity, are like super incredible," she rambled.

"That's what Kurt told me but I figured he was biased," Blaine said, hoping that his relaxed attitude would calm Britney down. "Which one is your sister?"

"That one," Britney pointed Kitty out. "The one scowling at Santana."

"I get the feeling that a lot of people are usually scowling at Santana, or Kurt for that matter," Blaine joked.

"They are," Britney said then panicked. "But it's not like everyone hates them or anything!" she backtracked. "People are just really jealous because I mean, look at them. They're flawless."

"Popularity comes with a price," Blaine half shrugged. "It's the same with being famous."

Britney nodded wordlessly. She was certain she was dreaming and would wake up at any given moment. There was no way in hell she was actually sitting next to Blaine Anderson.

"Alright you lazy fake tanning slackers!" Sue's voice rang out harshly. "Enough with the flailings and the wishing that you could be home watching some pathetic Lifetime movie about some sad little girl whose unrealistic expectations come true. Get in your places, NOW!"

Blaine turned to Britney while the Cheerios scattered. "She seems to be quite the character," he muttered.

"She scares me," Britney whispered back.

"Anderson!" Blaine turned to Sue with a raised brow. "Pay attention to your love buns. He's going to win me my seventh consecutive championship."

Blaine turned toward Kurt and smirked at the look of pure determination on his face. Without another thought, he pulled out his phone and took a picture to tweet later. The fans were going to love seeing Kurt in his natural element.


Blaine, Kurt, Santana, Quinn, and Brittany walked into a packed Hudmel home. The New Directions had been waiting all day for Cheerios practice to be over so they could finally meet Blaine. Kurt had expected his friends to be excited but he hadn't anticipated just how excited. Tina all but fainted in Mike's arms after releasing a high pitched scream. Sam and Artie bombarded him with questions before they even entered the living room. Mercedes hid behind her hands in order to stop herself from squealing like a maniac. Zizes hit Puck on the arm multiple times, muttering holy shit over and over again. And Puck simply stared with wide eyes. Kurt couldn't be certain but he was pretty sure that Puck had stopped breathing altogether.

Once the initial excitement wore off, the New Directions allowed them to take a seat on the couch before surrounding them. Blaine answered question after question, most having to do with the tour or what being famous was like. But then there were questions like Sam's that made absolutely no sense.

"So you're like way into superheroes right?" Sam asked continuing before Blaine could answer. "Cause I've always wondered, what if Batman was actually bitten by a vampire."

Blaine scrunched his brows, glancing at Kurt and then the rest of the New Directions who were all wearing the same, is he serious, face. Brittany was watching Blaine with an expectant look as if she too needed to know the answer. Blaine smiled at the blonds. "You know, that's a really good question. I'm sure there has to be fanfiction out there about it, right?"

"Dude, totally!" Sam exclaimed. "I should look that up."

The one person who didn't say a single word was Puck. He sat in the back of the group eyeing Blaine with disbelief. Never in his life did he think that he would ever be so close to Blaine and instead of excitement, he was anxious and unsure. How was he supposed to tell Blaine how much his music had affected him? How was he supposed to even talk to Blaine without seeming like a total idiot? Blaine was more than a rockstar, more than a legend. He was a myth and Puck was a mere mortal. There was no way in hell he could ever actually talk to Blaine.

"Puckerman!"

Puck looked at Kurt, his jaw unknowingly wide open. "Huh?"

"Why the hell are you staring at my soulmate?" Kurt asked with a hint of aggravation.

"And close your damn mouth. If you drool any more we're going to have an Olympic size pool in here," Santana said.

"I...what..." Puck shut his mouth and glared at his friends. "Screw you guys!" he shouted before storming off.

Kurt turned to Lauren with confusion. "What the hell was that Zizes?"

"Don't worry about him. It's complicated," Lauren answered dismissively though she knew exactly why Puck was acting that way. She thought about going after him but she knew he would be mad at her for it. She could already hear him bitching at her for following him out. They're going to think something's wrong with me, he would yell at her, He's going to think I'm fucking weird! She would talk to him about his inability to accept that he was just as awesome as Blaine Anderson later.


It wasn't until midway through the week that Blaine had the chance to be alone in his studio. The last few days had been filled with meeting family members, spending time with Kurt's friends, and a few trips to the cemetery. Blaine truly didn't mind. He loved that he was able to get to know this side of Kurt's life. But he knew that taking time apart was good for them so when Kurt asked if he minded staying home while the girls and he went to the mall, he jumped at the chance.

He played with the equipment for a little while and tested the soundboard before pulling out his laptop. He hadn't checked his email since they got back, out of fear that writing Hunter would somehow bite him in the ass. He wasn't surprised to find that Hunter had replied. He opened the email warily.

Blaine,

I'll admit that I was more than a little surprised by your email but I appreciated it. I spend an awful amount of time worrying about how Sebastian is doing. I'm genuinely happy that you've been able to talk with him, even if only for a short period of time. I think he's starting to open up to me, or at least trying to, and I know that talking to you is the reason why.

I'm not mad. I know that you and Sebastian have a close relationship, one that I won't truly understand until I know the whole truth of your time together. But I have accepted that you are and will always be a big part of his life. I've accepted that just like I need Wes to be my guide, Sebastian needs you. I need you to know that I no longer blame you for what happened in the past. Sebastian and my problems are our own, and although I don't know what happened or the whys, I know that you were there for him when he needed you most. For that I can only thank you.

I miss him too, more and more every single day. I'm not giving up on him, I can promise you that. We've spent too long living in the past. I've spent too much effort blaming you two without knowing the entire story. I'm done pushing him away. I will be here when he's ready. I will wait forever for him.

I don't know when you're leaving for tour again, but I would like to see you before you go. We could have dinner at my place if you like. Or we could meet at Dalton. Whichever you prefer. I just want to talk face to face. We were friends once; I'd like to be friends again.

I hope to hear from you soon.

Your Brother,

Hunter

Blaine was smiling so hard he was sure he looked like a madman. He replied with zero hesitation.

Hunter,

There are too many things I want to say to you that cannot be transcribed properly through email. Just know that I am always your friend. Always.

I would love to come over for dinner. I won't be leaving until after Valentine's Day so we have plenty of time to have dinner, coffee, visit at Dalton; all of it. Let me know when you're available and I will be there.

Your Brother,

Blaine

Blaine grabbed his cellphone and went into his messages. With Kurt gone, it was the perfect time to finally talk with Sebastian.

To Sebastian Smythe:

Are you available to Skype? I miss you man.

Blaine sent the text with an exhale. They'd been texting the past few days but that didn't mean Sebastian was ready to open up. He only had to wait about a minute before Sebastian Skyped him though. "Hey Seb," he greeted with a relieved smile. "Are you busy or can you talk?"

"Hey B," Sebastian smiled back. "I'm free for the night so we can talk," Blaine smiled broadly, Sebastian's soft tone giving him hope for the conversation ahead. "Where are you?" he asked looking past Blaine. "I thought you were at Kurt's."

"I am. This is my attic studio. His family built it for me as a Christmas gift," Blaine told him.

Sebastian nodded his approval. "That was very cool of them," he said. "So, how ya been? How's Ohio?"

Blaine half shrugged. "It's Ohio," he said dryly. "But I'm good. Kurt's family has been amazing. I um, I do have to tell you something though."

Sebastian recognized the look in Blaine's eyes and raised a brow. "B, why do you look guilty?"

Blaine shifted in his seat. Sebastian may be the easiest person to tell but that didn't mean his best friend wouldn't be pissed at his betrayal. He didn't even want to think about what the guys were going to say. "Ok, don't get mad at me," he said cautiously. "But...I may have cost The Warblers Nationals."

Sebastian's face dropped. "You what?"

Blaine cringed at Sebastian's tone. "I may have cost The Warblers Nationals?" he said as a question.

"How?"

"Well, you see, Kurt and I were talking last night," Blaine started nervously, looking away from Sebastian's judgmental eyes. He was in deep shit and he knew it, "and he kinda tricked me, and I sorta maybe told him that The Warblers would lose if the New Directions gave him the solo," he rushed out.

Sebastian didn't answer right away, waiting for Blaine to look up. When Blaine finally made eye contact with him, Blaine all but whimpered. "Let me get this straight," Sebastian said slowly and Blaine whined to himself. He may have underestimated how angry Sebastian would be. "You told Kurt that if he sang the solo, The Warblers would lose?"

Blaine gulped. "Yes."

Sebastian chuckled humorlessly. "You told Kurt, that if he, the flawless counter tenor, sang the solo, The Warblers would lose?"

Blaine bit his lip and nodded. "Yes."

"Are you out of your freaking mind?!" Sebastian yelled suddenly though a smirk played at his lips. He wasn't at all surprised. He could at least have some fun with it though. "How could you tell him that?! Blaine!"

"I know, I know."

"Do you?" Sebastian snapped. "You totally screwed The Warblers, B! There hasn't been a counter tenor at Dalton in I don't even know how many centuries! How could you do that?!"

"I'm sorry," Blaine said quietly. "I didn't mean to. He just does this thing with his mouth and he looks at me with these eyes and I'm just so weak, so very weak. Please don't hate me."

"Oh I don't hate you. You're a complete traitor, but I don't hate you," Sebastian shook his head with disbelief. "Wes on the other hand or Hunter, you better get into witness protection."

"You're not going to tell them are you?" Blaine asked wide eyed. "I mean, I'll have to tell the guys when we're back on tour but please don't tell Hunter. We're trying to be friends and if you tell him then he's never going to talk to me."

Sebastian sat back in his seat. "You and Hunter are trying to be friends?" he asked just above a whisper, Blaine's traitorous ways completely forgotten.

"Um...yeah," Blaine said hesitantly. He hadn't meant to tell Sebastian that but he didn't want to hide it either. "We've emailed a couple of times and we're trying to be friends again."

"You've been emailing him? For how long? When?"

"Just recently," Blaine told him. "I actually replied to an email before I text you."

Sebastian took a deep breath. "What did he have to say?"

"That he misses you," Blaine answered honestly. "That he'll wait until you're ready," Sebastian looked away, a small smile on his lips. "Have you talked to him lately?"

Sebastian half shrugged. "Kind of. We've been texting." "Oh?"

Sebastian nodded. "It's never about anything important, just movie stuff and Dalton."

"That stuff is important though, Seb," Blaine spoke softly. "That's you two getting to know each other again. It's a step in the right direction." Sebastian said nothing, looking off into the distance. "Are you going to tell me what happened that made you avoid me?" Blaine asked hopefully. "Or why you chose to move to London a month before you were needed?"

Sebastian sighed and rolled his eyes. "There's just...so much on my mind, B. I can't make heads or tails of it."

"Then talk to me," Blaine encouraged. "Tell me everything. Hell I'll even write you a damn song like when we were at Dalton." Sebastian chuckled softly. When they were younger, Blaine would take Sebastian's jumbled up mess of a mind and turn it into a song. He even wrote songs to help them study. Blaine had always been an incredible lyricist. "Just talk to me. Please."

Sebastian nodded, running his hands through his hair. "I guess I should start with admitting that I was drinking again."

"Oh, Seb."

"It's fine, I'm fine," Sebastian cut Blaine off. "I'm not anymore. I had been for a few months but I stopped after...after I gave Hunter an ultimatum."

"You gave him an ultimatum?" Blaine questioned. "Is that when the emotional transfer happened?"

"You figured that part out, huh?" Blaine shrugged with a nod. "Well yeah, that's when it happened. It was a couple of weeks after you found Kurt. I was so jealous that you were happy while I was still completely miserable so I emailed him, asked him to come with me or we were done and he chose to stay in Ohio." Blaine's heart broke for Sebastian. "I drowned my sorrows in whiskey that night and then when I woke up, I was numb. I didn't feel anything."

"Sebastian, I'm so sorry. I never should've thrown Kurt in your face like that," Blaine said.

"First of all, you didn't throw Kurt in my face. You simply shared your good news and that's fine. Second, don't ever be sorry for being happy, Blaine. You deserve to be," Sebastian assured him.

"Yeah well, so do you," Blaine reminded him.

Sebastian shrugged. "That's still to be seen. But anyway, after that, I don't know, I felt like everything was crumbling underneath me and yet, I didn't care. I even had a moment where I contemplated turning this role down, contract be damned."

"Sebastian."

"But I couldn't do it," Sebastian continued. "I couldn't look at myself in the mirror knowing that I had given up like my father, I just couldn't. So I packed my shit and left. I had hoped that being in London would refresh my soul or something but nothing, B. Yeah, I'm playing my part and I'm busting my ass over here, but I feel nothing. Every once in a while I get small waves of emotions but that's it. I'm so numb to the world around me. It's unreal. And you know," Sebastian laughed bitterly. "Those few months where I was drinking again, I drank and drank, praying that I would go numb, that I could just forget about Hunter and drink his memory away but I couldn't. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't drink him away. So when this happened, when the pain finally stopped, I thought, 'Fucking finally! I can breathe for a moment! I can stop thinking about him and move on with my life.' But B, it's so much worse now."

"How do you mean?"

"I'm never not thinking about him," Sebastian confessed. "He is always in the back of my mind. I stare at the pictures of us I took years ago and think about how different it all would have been if we had tried harder. I think about him so much more now that I don't feel pain. It's maddening! I even sang the other day, aloud and completely open, just so that I could feel something! How did he do this? How did he go so many years feeling so empty?"

"I don't know. But you know what? He's been asking himself how you dealt with the pain for so long," Blaine shared. "He told me so the day we went to Dalton. He's miserable right now and all he can think about is how you handled it."

"Is it bad that I'm kind of glad he's in pain?" Sebastian wondered. "It is isn't it? I should at least feel sorry that he's going through that because I know; I know how bad it feels. But instead I'm happy that he's finally in pain after so many years of ignoring me. I'm such a bastard."

"You're not."

"I am," Sebastian argued. "And I've accepted that I'm an awful person for being even remotely happy that he's a mess. But at the same time, I would take the pain in my heart over this emptiness any day. I would trade emotions again just so that he didn't have to feel what I felt; just so that I didn't feel so goddamn empty and bitter. I hate this, B. I hate myself for this." A tear ran down Sebastian's cheek and he groaned in aggravation. "And this!" he yelled wiping the tear away. "I keep having these moments where I all I do is cry but I feel nothing. No pain. No remorse. Nothing. I don't want to do this anymore! I just want to feel again. I want to love and to hurt again. I want Hunter." Sebastian whispered the last sentence, as if admitting it aloud would trigger his emotions. It didn't. "I don't know what to do, B. I'm so wrapped up in this movie that for the most part, I can ignore it all. But I don't want to be like this forever. I don't want Hunter to go through the pain I went through. I don't want him to lose himself like I did."

"I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better, Seb, but I really don't," Blaine said regrettably.

"I didn't expect you to," Sebastian said. "But I needed to get that out. I needed you to know what was in my head."

"Do you think that maybe you need to let Hunter know?" Blaine suggested. "Until you two talk, really talk, nothing's going to get better. You may fight and yell and curse each other, but maybe this time you'll stick it out until the end. Maybe then you'll both be able to move on, together."

"I don't know. Maybe," Sebastian shrugged. "I still love him, ya know. Even now that I'm numb, my love for him hasn't gone away. It's just muted."

Blaine smiled gently. "Of course you still love him. He's your soulmate, Sebastian. You're always going to love him."

"Yeah, I guess I will," Sebastian said more to himself. He knew though, that he would always love Hunter. He knew that no matter what, there would never be anyone else in the world that would make him feel like Hunter. He just hoped they would finally get their chance at happiness.

"SMYTHE! OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR!"

Sebastian turned his head with confusion. "B, let me call you back. I think I'm in trouble."

"What did you do?" Blaine asked with concern.

"SMYTHE!"

Sebastian turned to Blaine and shrugged. "I have no idea. I'll call you back."

Blaine nodded and ended the call. He drummed his fingers on his keyboard for a moment before grabbing his new notebook and jotting down the lyrics that were fresh in his mind. Maybe writing Sebastian a song wasn't a bad idea after all.


Sebastian got up from his seat and opened his trailer door cautiously. "Hey, what's going on?"

Stephen stormed into his trailer angrily. "What's going on is that your damn dog is terrorizing this lot!"

Sebastian rolled his eyes. The white dog he'd seen the night they went out had somehow snuck past the security. No matter how many times they kicked him out, he'd find a way back in and was wreaking havoc everywhere he went. Everywhere but one place; Sebastian's trailer.

"For the hundredth time he is not my dog," Sebastian grumbled. He looked past Stephen through the open door to see the dog sitting at the end of his steps.

"Well he sure seems to think he's your dog," Stephen quipped. "He's running amok all over the costumes, he's pissing and shitting at the edge of everyone's trailer butyours, and if you don't do something about it, I'm going to kill him."

"You can't kill him. He's just a dog," Sebastian defended.

Stephen huffed and walked out of the trailer. He picked the dog up, brought him inside, and handed him to Sebastian. "Then figure something out."

"Why me?" Sebastian grumbled.

"Because your trailer is the only one he hasn't shit on and because when he's done terrorizing the place for the day, he comes to your steps to sleep," Stephen told him. "Congrats, Smythe. You officially have a new dog."

Sebastian sighed as Stephen walked out of his trailer and slammed the door shut. He set the dog down and walked to his small couch, the dog following close behind. "What do you want from me puppy? I'm not a good owner. I can't keep you. Don't you have anywhere to go?" The dog jumped on the couch next to Sebastian and rested his head on Sebastian's thigh. "Are you serious right now?" Sebastian pet the dog, feeling the softness of his fur. The dog looked up at him. "Well, you were someone's dog. You're clean and you don't seem to be sick. Isn't there someone missing you? Someone you miss?" the dog barked at him and laid his head back down.

Sebastian exhaled. "I guess I'm stuck with you, huh?" the dog jumped off his lap and sat at his feet, his tail wagging excitedly. "What do I call you? Poncho?" the dog tilted its head. "No? How about Rocky? Or Baelfire?" the dog half growled half barked and Sebastian smirked. "Don't like those either? Ok then. How about...Parrish?" the dog sat straighter, its tail wagging wildly. "Parrish? Do you like that? Is that your name?" Parrish jumped up on Sebastian and started licking his face. "Alright, alright. Parrish it is. Get off me." Parrish jumped off with ease. "Well someone certainly trained you," Parrish barked at him. Sebastian ran his hands through his hair and sighed. What had he gotten himself into?

An hour and a text to Blaine explaining what happened later, Sebastian was sitting on the couch laughing as Parrish played on his lap. He never considered himself too much of an animal person but the energetic dog seemed to bring the kid out in him.

"Yo, Sebby," Windsor's voice carried through his trailer.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "I told you not to call me that," he said in a thick New England accent.

"Yeah well I told you to quit making fun of the way I talk and yet, here we are," Windsor snipped. "We're going out to dinner. You wanna join?"

Sebastian shrugged. "Not tonight. Parrish and I are having a little too much fun. Besides, I don't trust him alone in here yet." Parrish barked at him and he smirked, scratching behind Parrish's ears.

"Parrish, huh? Like Hunter?"

Sebastian whipped his head up. "What?" he breathed out. "Hunter Parrish," Windsor clarified with narrowed eyes.

"Oh, right," Sebastian looked away and shook his head. "I didn't think anyone would get that, least of all you," he joked though his heart was hammering in his chest.

"Of course I know who Hunter Parirsh is," Windsor scoffed in offense. "I'm not uncultured swine."

"Right, sorry," Sebastian muttered.

"Alright well, you have fun with your new puppy," Windsor shrugged. "Later."

Sebastian waved dismissively. He hadn't been thinking too much when he was trying to come with a name and the connection hadn't dawned on him until his costar mentioned it. Had he really named the dog Parrish after the actor simply because he shared the same first name? He didn't want to believe it. He wanted to think it was merely a coincidence. But he knew that when it came to his Hunter, nothing was ever a coincidence.

He picked Parrish up and placed him on his lap. He laid back on the side of the couch, pulled out his phone, and took a picture. He stared at it for only a moment before attaching it to a message and texting Hunter.

To Hunter:

So I guess I have a dog now.

Parrish climbed up Sebastian's chest and laid his head down. Sebastian smiled. Maybe having a dog wouldn't be a bad thing.

From Hunter:

You got a dog? I didn't know you were a dog person.

Sebastian smirked and replied.

To Hunter:

I'm not. Or at least I didn't think I was. This little guy has been terrorizing everyone on set except me. Apparently that makes him my dog.

From Hunter:

Are you going to try to find his owner?

To Hunter:

Yeah I guess I should. I won't lie though. I kinda hope no one claims him. I like having him around. I named him Parrish.

From Hunter:

He is a cute dog. Maybe you'll get lucky and be able to keep him for good. I like that name.

Sebastian smiled, taking a deep slow breath. Texting Hunter was getting easier. The tiny waves of joy that came from every reply made Sebastian crave Hunter's attention more and more each day. Maybe it was time to make a move, even if it was a small one.

To Hunter:

I'm going to be real honest here, Hunter. I'm not ready to talk to you yet. I'm not ready to open up that wound. But I do like this. I like texting you. I'd really like to keep it up. Don't feel like you need to wait for me to text. You can message me whenever about whatever random thing your students are doing. I'd really like it if we could get to know each other again.

Sebastian exhaled slowly as he hit send. His heart beat erratically and the fear of being turned away was incredibly real. Hunter text him back almost instantly.

From Hunter:

Yes. I'd love to get to know you, really get to know you. That's where we screwed up last time.

I miss you Bas.

Sebastian laughed a bit manically at the replies, the tears streaming down his face without him noticing.

To Hunter:

I miss you too Hunter. Thank you for giving me time.

From Hunter:

Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere.