The next day
As Bobby was completing the discharge papers for me outside, I was getting dressed when my doctor, Dr. Jane, came in to check on me.
"Hi, Emma. I wanted to give my condolences about the baby." Dr. Jane says, looking at me sadly.
"Thank you." I say quietly, putting on my light jacket.
"Emma, I filled out a prescription for you, a Valium in case you need it," she says, passing the pill bottle to me.
I nodded, taking the pills and put it in my bag. "Thanks."
I looked away from her to the windows and stared out. She's still here so I looked back at her.
"Yes?" I say quietly.
"I wanted to tell you that the miscarriage wasn't your fault. We ran your blood tests and they came out normal. We…. Tested your baby's tissues and it turned out that the baby had chromosome problems and that's why you had the miscarriage. However, the good news is that you can have another child and it'll be healthy this time."
I looked away in tears and nodded. "Dr. Jane, I won't get pregnant again. This baby was part of my late boyfriend…. He died back in May. So… to think of having another child…. I just can't," I say, wiping my tears away and looked at her again. She looks so guilty at what she had said to me and tried to apologize but I stopped her.
"No, it's okay. You didn't know. Thank you for everything that you have done for me in the past few weeks. I'll like to be alone, Dr. Jane… if you don't mind."
Dr. Jane nods and walked out, leaving me here in this quiet room. It was the first time that I was alone so I could think.
I stood in the same spot for a while, looking out of the windows and was going through everything that had happened since Dean died and the more I think about the loss of Dean and my baby, the more I got angry.
Bobby interrupted my thought process with a knock on the door.
"Emma, you're discharged now. You're ready?"
I grabbed my bag and walked to the door. I opened it and walked past Bobby. "Yeah, I'm ready. Let's go."
As Bobby drove me back to his place, we sat in the car in silence. Bobby noticed my mood and left me alone. As we arrived to his place, I got out of his car and started to walk into the junk yard.
"Emma, where are you going?"
"Just leave me alone, Bobby." I snapped back at him, not even bothering to look over my shoulder.
Junk cars atop of junk cars surrounded around me as I stopped in the middle. I started to breathe heavily as the flashbacks of Dean dying and my baby's death rushed through my mind. I look around and saw the crowbar. I then remembered that Dean used the crowbar against the Impala when he got angry.
I stride over to the crowbar and grabbed it.
I held it in my hand as I stood and looked around me slowly, letting out an angry sob as my memories flooded into my memory and I closed my eyes.
*Dean smiling at me as we lay in bed; seeing my child on the ultrasound for the first time, jumping on Sam's back at the beach during the break of our case, me coming back from my death, seeing the boys for the first time since my death, my adopted parents smiling at me as I walk across the stage for my high school graduation. *
I got very overwhelmed with all the memories in my mind that I opened my eyes, letting out another sob. "God…. If you can hear me…. How could you take away the people I loved…. Why? How could you do this to me?!" I shouted at the sky, and then proceed to slam the crowbar against the junk car's window, causing it to shatter all over the place.
"WHY?!" I screamed as I slammed the crowbar against the car again. "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?" I screamed out again, slamming it against another car.
I just continued to destroy one of the cars with the crowbar, slamming it over and over again.
I threw the crowbar away, letting out an enraged scream. "I don't deserve this! I was supposed to have this baby! I was supposed to…" I fell down to my knees, sobbing heavily.
Regardless that I used the crowbar to take it out of the junk cars, I could still feel the rage inside me and I didn't know how to get rid of it.
That's when I decided to do something for the first time in a long time that I haven't done….my powers.
I stood up slowly and let out a sigh, then closed my eyes, raising my arms up slowly, my palms facing the cars.
I focus on my rage and I could feel my arms shaking with the powers building up. As I felt my powers building up quickly, I could hear the unbroken windows started to rattle and I knew that my powers were working then.
I opened my eyes quickly and let out a scream, the white lights came out of my palms, hitting the windows and almost every single of the windows shattered. I continued using my powers until the rage and the pain was gone and I collapsed down to my knees, exhausted.
I heard running footsteps towards to me and I was breathing heavily, looking up.
It was Bobby. He looks panicked and he must have heard everything. "Emma!" Bobby calls out as he got down to his knees near me and put his arms around me.
"What happened? Balls, what the hell did you do to my junk cars!" Bobby exclaims as he looks at the damaged junk cars and the broken glasses on the ground.
"I did it…. I was able to let all the anger… the pain… out…. That's what I did." That's what the last thing that I had said to Bobby before I blacked out in his arms.
July 10, 2008
I let out a groan as I wake up in my room and there was Bobby, sitting near me asleep. I could feel something cold resting on my forehead.
"Bobby?" I whisper in confusion and he woke up quickly, letting out a relieved sigh. "Emma, thank god."
He caresses my head and removed a cold compress from my forehead, then rests his palm on my forehead. "Your fever's broken… thank god."
"What happened?" I ask, still in a whisper.
"I don't know… all I know is that yesterday, you went into the junk yard and the next thing I know is that you're screaming and I saw white light flashing out in the yard so when I ran in, you were on your knees… so exhausted. I asked you what happened and you mumbled to me that you did it, that you were able to remove your pain and the anger and you passed out on me. I took you inside and you were running a pretty high fever. I had a doctor coming in to check on you and she thought that you were still suffering from the loss of your baby so I kept an eye on you all night, using this to keep your fever down. Emma, do you remember anything?"
The memories from yesterday came back to me and I nodded. "Yes…. I was so mad… so angry that I needed to get it out of me. I used my powers for the first time and I…. I guess it took a toll on me."
"Emma…. was that a new power?" Bobby asks, looking so serious for the first time in his life.
"I think so. I mean… I never had a white light coming out of my palms before, so….it's new to me."
"Balls…."
I sat up slowly and rested against the headboard. "Bobby… you cannot say anything to Sam about this… ever. Not even about the baby. It's like… that it never happened."
"Emma, you can't be serious."
"I am. I am serious, Bobby. For the past two days since I lost the baby, I have been thinking and….I need to move on. If I stay, it's going to be hard for me to move on because….there's memories of Dean here and I can't relive the memories over and over again. It's painful."
Bobby nodded, getting what I was trying to tell him.
"You want to leave."
I took his hand and held it. "I'm sorry, Bobby." I whispered, ashamed of myself for wanting to leave.
"But I understand, Emma. You gotta move on. There's nothing here for you. You got me, but really… there's nothing for you. I mean…you can't go back to hunting again, can you?"
I shook my head. "No…even I was good at it, I just can't. Dean wouldn't want me to do this. Sam's gone….god knows where and everything is so different. I need to figure myself out and try to find out more about my birth mother…find out where I came from."
Bobby shook his head. "Yeah, Em. You should do it. You can always call me and ask me anything."
I gave him a quick hug. "Thank you, Bobby." I whisper into his ear and he responds by hugging me tightly.
Wow, Emma got another new power...whew. Please leave a review to let me know what do you think it's going to happen to Emma now that she is moving on to somewhere else. Thanks. You will see Sam and Dean soon... :D
Hell's Butterflies: That's why Emma lost the baby. :(
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