Fate watched with curiosity as Dong Hua Dijin did something that even she did not expect, attempt to use his powers to see his Feng Jiu again. Well, if their romance was actually this interesting, then she could not just end it this soon. So, she made his magic work in unexpected ways, sending both of the foolish lovers on an unwritten trial. Both were to keep their memories, just to add a bit of flavour to the mix. After all, if they were crazy enough to defy her, who knows what other things they would do. She laughed to herself as she saw them both wake up, most likely disappointed to find that they were not dead and find themselves in a mortal trail. Well, time to make this just a little bit harder. She thought as she appeared before Feng Jiu to add just a sprinkle of fun into the mix. "I have decided to let you live, but this comes with one price. Your name will be erased from the Stone of Three Lives. You must never love again, for the romance will be doomed." I explained to her, not bothering to add that there was one person who she could still love.
"Then I ask you to help me through this deal. I wish for you to take away my ability to love," Feng Jiu politely asked. Oh, this is just getting more interesting by the second!
"Although I can not completely take away your ability to love, I will help you. You will still have a heart, but it will be made of stone. You will only love when you let yourself with all your might," I told her, biting back laughter, "Deal?"
"Deal," she quickly agreed. I nodded, returned to my palace and laughed myself to sleep.
I did not regret agreeing to her deal, for now I did not have to love anybody other than Dong Hua Dijin. The only downside was that I no longer felt a tingle of glee when I thought about him. My memories of the time I spent with him were not quite the same. I could see the love in them, but the memories did not feel like my own. I could not feel the love that I could see so clearly before me. "Thank you, Fate" I whispered, "Now I do not have to deal with the cruelty of being destined to be with anybody other than Dijin or feel the pain of heartbreak." I laughed, but there was no joy behind it. My heart had been alone for too long, and I could not stand it any longer, so my choice was quick and I did not dare look back. I had built myself a wall of stone around my heart.
Hundreds of years flew by in a blur as I went through lifetime after lifetime in solitude. Although sometimes, it was hard. I did have my favorite ones. When I was the single old lady who gave all her love on her pets and plants, I grew quite attached to a little red fox that reminded me of my past self. I hope it was not too broken-hearted when I moved to my next life. In another, while I was an old but wise queen who needed no emperor, I forged a steady friendship with a young messenger boy. I had saved his life after he had gotten on the wrong side of the escaped zoo lion. However, I knew that I had to keep strong, even when it broke my heart to turn down his father's well meaning marriage proposal, I knew we were not fated to be. I guess that seeing myself in so many of my lives, yet having to act like Dijin was only fair in exchange for my lungs to keep breathing and the lack of heartbreak.
I could swear that Fate had been taunting me from the moment I opened eyes and saw that I was not dead! She told me that my name was irreversibly back on the Stone, and it was not with anybody else just yet. Ever since that moment, I have been seeing Jiu'er in every lifetime I have had. Only several times has she even noticed me, but she never seems to recognize who I am. One time I even bagained with Fate to get one life as a red fox, just to see whether she would get the hint. I now believe I know how she felt even when she tried to win my affections. I have given up so much of my dignity simply to be by her side, it's infuriating. Once, I simply had to look at her and she would go weak at the knees in love with me, but now it seems like I can not do anything to even grab her attention. I was her favorite pet fox, and she was an old, sweet lady. I was the little, helpless messenger boy, while she looked absolutely stunning as a lifesaving queen. Our roles have completely reversed in the mortal realm and I will not stop chasing her. I will chase you to the ends of the earth and beyond, Xiao Bai. Didn't you know?
This time, I will just tell her. Being subtle and secretive did not work every single time, I had to tell her it was me. I just need to catch her attention first in a way that was not too embarrassing. The last time I tried it, I went too far, realising the most golden looking lion I could find and making it despise me. By the time she dashed over to help, it would have just been humiliating to reveal time, I will not go too far. I just needed a lake, some dancers and a big roc bird. Why not get Feng Jiu to give you ideas? They would be less stupid! I sighed, but started finding a lake. This time, I would save her! It worked when we first met, didn't it?
I had to admit, watching this go down was even more fun than I had ever imagined. I had truly expected them not to actually switch roles when I made them switch starting points, but two fools that make each other even more foolish are meant to be unexpected. Now this was proper entertainment! Comedy at its finest was playing out before my eyes. The Mortal Realm was so much more interesting with those two idiots in it! I wished that The Lover Fools was actually a tv show, because I would definitely recommend it to any of you. Yes, you there reading this right now. Ok, enough breaking the fourth wall, time to get back to The Lover Fools. Yes, I recorded it. I'll post it as soon as I find a way to post videos through the fourth wall. Annoying little thing, that wall. Where were we? Oh yes, The Lover Fools!
It had taken a long time, but it was finally ready! The empress, Jiu Bai Feng, was going to visit the dance I had set up at the lake! I had the roc bird ready to swoop, the dancers ready to dance! I think these all years are starting to drive me mad. She had arrived, beautiful as ever and I leaned back, trying to get a better look of her in purple robes. They suit her. I had designed the dancing platform not to have a barrier surrounding it, just to make the rescue easier. My laziness was my downfall. I tripped over the tiny "barrier" and fell into the water. Looking back, I probably should have learnt to swim in this body. I might have laughed at the irony of the situation if I was not drowning. Is my dignity really just worth a handful of "views on GodTube"? Do I really mean that little to you?
As Jiu Bai Feng pulled me out of the lake, Fate replied, Yes, absolutely. As my pathetically fragile mortal body coughed up more water, I started planning my next life's meeting with Jiu'er. This one was yet another embarrassing failure, and I was starting to run out of ideas. If I wanted to reveal my identity, I had to wait until I could be saving her life, not the other way around. "Thank you," I coughed, not wanting to sound ungrateful.
"Serves you right for not bothering to add a fence," she teased, giving me the slightest of smiles. Before I could answer, she walked away saying there were places she had to be and that "the fool will live". Knowing that it would be no use chasing her, I tried forgetting that this ever happened. Of course, I followed her anyway, lagging behind like a lost puppy. I was pretty sure I had no dignity left by now, so why not? It's not like she would even recognize me anyways. "How long are you going to keep following me like this?" she asked angrily, not knowing that I knew exactly who she had gotten that question from. I barely just stopped myself from saying the words that she had told me all those years ago.
"Just listen to me, I have been trying to find a way to tell you something for years," I said nervously. "I have something to tell you, you need to know that I …" She stopped walking and held up her hand to tell me to stop talking.
"I will explain this simply for you, Jin Dong. You and I are not destined to be, despite how much you may think you love me. We will be doomed to have an ill-fated romance, if I even have a romance at all. I will never love, you have to understand that." She told me coldly, not knowing how much her words hurt. Unable to take any more lifetimes of torment, I decided to try gathering up the courage to tell her the truth. "Jiu'er, will you ever stop making this harder on both of us?" I asked innocently, knowing she would recognize the nickname.
"What did you say?" she yelled, spinning towards me suddenly. That could have gone better. Now lower her voice to a whisper, she asked again, "What did you say?"
"Not even Fate can stop us from being together, Jiu'er. I wish I had known it sooner, but I still can tell you now. I love you, Jiu'er. I want us both to properly marry, forget the ill-fated romance nonsense!" I told her before worrying that I was going too fast in my anxiousness to be with her again.
"Yes!" she laughed after a brief pause, "I have been wishing for you to say those words ever since you saved my life all those years ago!" I gave her a real smile, something few had ever seen, yet it came so easily when it was for her. She said yes! She actually said yes! "Wait … how many lifetimes did you try to approach me using my own tactics?" she asked, suddenly linking up the dots. Really Fate, really? Oh well, it was still worth it. Maybe I'll laugh at this moment later on in life. Much later.
I smiled from above, happy that The Lover Fools had finally reached its grand finale. Those two idiots had changed my account from just some newbie's unwatched videos to the account that had posted some of GodTube's biggest hits! I would have thanked them, but I had dignity! Instead, I went for a different tactic, allowing them to have a child. I knew that this had quite some potential of being interesting, after all, when two idiots manage to marry each other by sheer idiocy, they will probably rub at least some of it on their kid. I believe you might have an idea of what this means, well, I'll tell you anyways. It means The Lover Fools gets to have a season two!
