*If you've read chapter 1 already, reread it please. I practically rewrote the whole thing. Totally sorry to get your hopes up if you were expecting a new one already.

I don't own Oregairu, unfortunately. Maybe in the next life.


I had a fresh start.

A reset you could call it. When one has a mass change in scenery, whether it be moving to a new house, getting a new job, or just meeting a new person. In my case, graduation.

After my first day went wrong, in which I, the main character, saved a poor girl's dog from being hit by a car, which then landed myself in the hospital for a week, I had then proceeded to make zero friends in my first year of high school. I had introduced myself a week late, which granted some slight traction, but even that ultimately went against me. Ever since then, the same precedent followed me through the rest of my years of schooling. Minus the car accident, of course.

So, I had been a loner for most of my high school life. I was the perverted, creepy Hikigaya-san who always sat in class, flipping through a cheeky light novel or an elaborate book. No in-between.

When the graduation ceremony had finally arrived, and we sat in our cheap, foldable aluminum chairs, I finally came to the conclusion of my current predicament. No more talking to random classmates, no more hearing Tobe bicker in the back of class, with Hina screaming about yaoi. I'll say it once more.

A fresh start.

Or so I thought.

Instead of going for a local route, I decided to pursue my college career in America, where nobody would find me. I had been vehemently sharpening my English skills as life went on at Sobu High, and it paid off when I received an offer to Stanford University. One of the largest schools for economics and business. (note: I picked a school at random, I couldn't really come up with anything.)

I had practically worked my ass off through all of third year, having absolutely zero social interaction with anyone or anything and focused it solely on my educational career. In hindsight, I was already doing this, but I didn't really notice at the time. My efforts were solely focused on getting out of this hellhole of a school and country, and maybe then, I'd be better off.

Thinking about it now, my only memorable experience was one of my latter interactions with my teacher, Hiratsuka-sensei.

Queue brief flashback to end of year two:

"Ne, Hikigaya." We were sitting in her, 'office,' or for better words, a coffee table and two leather loveseats. How professional.

"Hmm?" I replied, taking a sip of my MAX Coffee.

"You better do good, kid. Or I'll come back and haunt you." She gave me a slight glare.

"O-of course, sensei!" I cowered under her glare, taking another sip of my coffee.

End flashback.

It turns out, my current literature teacher, Shizuka Hiratsuka, was quitting her job.

I still remember her warming smile, that said, "Do what I say or I'll kill you."

Anyways, you know the rest. Studied my ass off, got into a good college. Made my teacher proud for once.

After making the unfortunate announcement of my acceptance into college abroad, my parents and sister, Komachi, began to make preparations for my move.

They packed most of my things in about a day's time. It's like they were excited to get me out of the house.

We flew out, moved out, then they dumped me off at my dorm, and then they left. Leaving me here, all by myself.

"Bye Hachiman! Make sure you study hard, okay?" Komachi yelled as they left my room for the last time.

She turned her back, mumbling to my parents. "Kaa-san, when's our flight? I'm already sick of this place." She turned back around and waved, slamming my door shut. Reminds me of how much I love my sister.

Fast forward two or three days. The day of my advising, or orientation, or whatever university decided to call it. I walked in the somewhat cozy building after a decently long walk.

I was led to room 306, my advisors office. I heard she was new to the university, I hadn't really bothered to get a name or read any emails. I just checked my schedule to see when I was supposed to show up.

I walked down the modern corridor, turning right to face the wooden door. I knocked twice, and after a brief pause, the door opened.

A lady in her early thirties, a somewhat mature look on her face, and hair midway down her back. Those were the first three things I noticed before a state of shock filled my body.

The color practically drained from my face the second I recognized her. The romcom gods absolutely despised me.

Hiratsuka-sensei is standing in front of me again. Her mere presence managed to put me in emotional shock. She radiated a passive aura of malice, the memories of her practically beating me senseless vivid in my mind.

After a few seconds of us staring agape at each other, I prompted the question.

"...um, why are you here, exactly?"

She smiled, ruffling my hair. "Why do you think, Hikigaya? Someone has to follow you and deal with your repulsive attitude in the states! Damn, I've done so much for you now that I think about it! You're lucky I didn't force you to join the service club last year!"

Oh yeah, that's right. She was going to force me to join that club, whatever it was called. She always threatened it, but never actually made me do it. With my luck, I wouldn't have made any valuable connections at all, anyways.

I also figured that wasn't the real reason she was here. It was most likely a matter of extreme coincidence, not that it truly matters now. The mental pain and suffering had already begun.

I sighed, about to open my mouth and ask something else, before she waved me off, beckoning me into her office. I stood outside for a second, attempting to gather my senses.

Aren't there random words people say to gather their senses? Kumbaya or something like-

Hiratsuka-sensei sent me another glare. I rushed inside.

It was pretty plain, surprisingly. She had an empty shelf adjacent to the door, and a desk cluttered with paperwork in front of it. Unbeknownst to her, I noticed the three shonen manga volumes sitting on the corner, thoroughly read through. She noticed my glance, throwing them into one of the drawers. She took a seat.

I stood awkwardly, not knowing what to necessarily do.

"Sit down Hikigaya, before I make you. You're lucky my one-two punch isn't very famous here yet, but I can use you as a test dummy, if you'd like."

I immediately rushed to a seat, clutching my stomach in fear. My bowel organs would not be embalmed today.

"Your office is pretty plain, Hiratsuka-sensei. No pictures, especially of anyone male, so I'm assuming you aren't married yet?" I prompted.

A gust of wind blew by his head as she leaned over her desk, an angry scowl on her face.

"Say that one again, and I kill you." She slumped back down in her seat a second later, retracting her fist beforehand. "But to answer your question, no, I haven't found a husband yet, thank you for asking." She rocked in her chair, leaning back and forth in contemplation.

"So how are you a college advisor now? Weren't you just a rogue, lonely literature teacher before?"

She exhaled in sorrow. Probably because I called her lonely, huh.

"Besides my usual hobbies," Drinking, sleeping, and reading manga.

"I had been studying at university to get my doctorate. I never really told anyone." My eyes widened in slight surprise. I didn't necessarily think she was capable of that.

"Afterward, I just erratically decided to move out here. Not really sure why." She began to ponder something, her eyes dulling.

Now she remembered her lack of a husband. This isn't going to go well.

She snapped her head up suddenly, gazing at her computer screen. "Oh, I almost forgot! Anyways Hikigaya, since you amazingly managed to make your way here, it's time to actually talk about the reason you're in my office!"

Oh no, the college preparedness mutterings begin. How youthful.

She proceeded to spend over twenty minutes talking, discussing class sign-up procedures, expectations, events (which I didn't care a single bit for) and my path to "success," or whatever they call it. There were a few things thrown around about my major too, but I wasn't truly listening.

I was practically forced to pay attention. The second I attempted to doze off in her semi-boring lecture, she slammed the desk, gazing at me with murderous intent.

Speaking of majors, I was narrowly reminded about my own harrowing choice.

Major declaration. The absolute epitome of college life. It's as if society forced you to answer one of the most important questions in your lifespan, then proceed to make you study it for four consecutive years right after, culminating in locking you into your corporate office job.

I told myself in middle school I wouldn't fall in that hole. Look at me now, attending an advising session.

I decided in third year that I would go into economics. This was strategically planned, equal to an act by the ancient grandmasters of Japanese war.

Now, you may be thinking, but Hachiman! You don't want to do any work, why would you become an Economics major and slave away at your corporate workhouse? You see, even though I may be locked into this horrid job, once you get high enough on the corporate ladder, you can use your high status to marry one befitting of your position. Then, afterward, you can miraculously retire, becoming a faithful househusband. The perfect plot and plan, winning me the war.

If that doesn't work out, well, there was always the slight chance at the stock market. That was still a gamble, anyways. What was that one fiasco that happened recently, something with Game… I don't know.

Midway through her intense lecture, she paused, breaking me out of my chain of thought. She questioned herself for a second, probably thinking up some great idea, just as all teachers should, then spoke.

"And there are clubs to join. Usually, you're not required to actually join one, since you practically made it to college already, but I'm going to force you. Pick one you like, or else I'll pick one for you." She had a demonic smile on her face as she closed her eyes and tilted her head sideways.

You give off the illusion of being cute, when in reality you're an absolute devil. Maybe if someone married her she wouldn't do that. Someone marry her. Please.

I sighed.

"Do I really have to sign up for a club? I can just do my own thing in college, you know? Sitting in my room all day, relaxing, then going to classes and doing my work when I please. I'm good at this, I swear!"

"Hmm… how about, no. Unless you have a better idea?"

"Of course not, Hiratsuka-sensei! I'll find a club to join as soon as possible!"

Her frightening tone forced me to switch languages out of fear, how is she even capable of that?

That plan was foiled instantly. I let off another sigh as she continued to drone on about the rest of the important things in college life. My phone buzzed, a random text from Komachi appearing on the screen. I hope college is treating you well, Hachiman! That thoughtful text earned me a lot of points, didn't it? I gave my phone a somewhat amused stare, setting it down once again.

Hiratsuka-sensei sighed, noticing my disinterest. I guess she decided to spare me for today.

"Well Hikigaya, on that note, I'll let you go for now. Let me know if you have any questions! You know where to find me!" Hiratsuka-sensei beamed as she leaned back in her chair once more. I nodded my head, grabbing my bag and throwing it over my shoulder as I stood up.

I left the room, beginning to tread through the corridor once again. A few students walked throughout, but in general, it was mostly quiet. Pretty surprising for a large campus. I kept to my thoughts for the time being, making the slow trek back to my room. The walk was pretty long, so it took me through some lush parks and amazing buildings, but I figured I'd get bored of it after walking through a few years. I pondered what club I would end up joining, however boring it may have turned out to be.

Let's see, there's the student council… no, probably not. Anime club? Too many normies. Especially in America, yeesh. A sports club is also not happening. I honestly have no earthly idea what club I'll end up joining. Preferably one with little to no work involved, or maybe even one with so many members that I can just never show up after the first meeting! Who knows. I'll look up a list when I get back to my room, I guess. The mind of your average, boring high school- no, college student.

I arrived back at my room. After taking an elevator up to the seventh floor, randomly encountering some wild students, probably just waking up from some dumb college party, I paced through the plentiful amount of rooms, stopping at 713.

The whole dormitory was co-ed, meaning girls and boys both on the same floors. A newer thing the university wanted to try out, in favor of, "Promoting collaboration and productivity," or whatever bullshit they were spewing. Who knows why they actually did it. As I was about to open my door, another next to me was pulled open, almost flying off the hinges.

"-look, look, I'm sorry okay? I didn't mean for it to happen, it was all just in the heat of the moment!" A male voice said. A blonde boy stepped out of the room, followed by a black haired girl. I didn't pay much attention to it, really. What was the purpose of focusing my efforts on something as trivial as that.

"You honestly disgust me, Hayama. Why do I even bother, placing any trust in you? A complete lack of respect from you, especially after all I've done for you. Just-

He opened his mouth to speak again. He was cut off.

"-As I was about to say. Just leave." She slammed the door shut on him.

He let out a sigh as he began to walk off. He turned to face me, my shocked expression practically reflecting in his retinas.

"Sorry you had to hear that." Hayama said as he walked off, disappearing into the elevator a few seconds later.

I stood in front of my door, contemplating the scene that just took place in front of me. A girl with waist-length black hair, a slim figure, and dazzling blue eyes just got… cheated on, I think? Ouch.

She burst back out of her room, frantically looking in multiple directions. She started to swiftly walk in the direction of the elevator.

Nobody should share the same fate as my middle school self, so I, the honorable Hachiman, not the god, will save her from it!

"Who are you to question my motives, yet alone attempt to stop me. The fact that you even assumed that I was going to go and speak with him after our previous interaction shows your ignorance." She gave me an icy look, turning away and walking down the hall.

Why am I choosing to be nice? The attractiveness of this girl is forcing me to be polite to someone I want zero interaction with, disgusting.

"Nice to meet you! I guess I'll see you around, hopefully on better terms!" Was what I hoped she was going to say. Didn't happen.

I decided to just give up for the day and retire to my dorm room.


My ears picked up an audible knock about an hour or two later.

"Who is it?" I asked, sitting up from my slouched position in front of my computer.

"The girl from next door. Yukino."

Oh, now I was curious. The girl who bad mouthed me like a degenerate a second ago is now knocking on my door. This is like the set-up plot to a romcom novel.

I walked over, opening the door to reveal the black-haired girl from before.

"Yo." I said, giving off a slight nod. I was still slightly angry about earlier, but I have a gut feeling that someone like her wouldn't give a damn.

"I'd like to apologize for the incident earlier. Although it was only a minor inconvenience to you, I didn't necessarily want to get off on the wrong foot. That's all." She said, a hint of formality in her voice.

I awkwardly scratched the back of my head. "Hm, Yukino, right? Thanks, I guess."

She shot another glare at me. The first time wasn't enough for you, was it?

"You know, for someone from Japan, you sure don't have that touch of politeness I would expect. It's kind of disheartening, frankly." She flipped her hair over shoulder.

Oh, she's one of those girls.

"How do you know I'm from Japan? And why does it matter to you, aren't you supposed to be apologizing? Even then, that's an absolutely horr-"

She cuts him off, shoving past him into his room. She grabs the chair he was sitting in, pulling it out and swiftly sitting in it, keen to a snake. She looked up at Hachiman, expectantly.

"If you don't mind. I was feeling slightly tired."

Yep, definitely one of those girls.

My shoulders slumped. I didn't want to deal with this at all. I was enjoying my quiet time, alone. Might as well get this over with.

I went over and plopped on my bed. I let my breath leave my body. I can just die and this'll be over, right? Why am I choosing to do this. I guess it's the romcom gods or something, setting up an opportunity for my struggles. Karma, maybe. Although I'm not a Buddhist monk.

All while this was happening, she sat there, just staring at me.

"You move like a sad sloth. It's entertaining." She stated.

"Oh, the way I act is entertaining to you now? What is this, a circus? I can kick you out when I please, I hope you know that much."

She smirked, practically taunting me.

"Oh please, sloth boy. You'll never have a girl like me in your room ever again, appreciate it for once."

"So now I'm, 'sloth boy.' Although I don't necessarily disagree with you, you're still just slandering me after an attempt to apologize. You're pretty terrible at this."

In my defense, I was right. She randomly showed up after yelling at me in the hall. Then, she comes into my room under the guise of apology, just to make fun of me again. It's like national 'Hate Hachiman Hikigaya' day, isn't it?

"This is just like middle school. I'm being traumatized by all my peers again, aren't I. I'm going to have another relapse."

She instantly jabbed back. "That's pretty depressing for a college student, Mr. Whatever-your-Name-Was. Shouldn't you be over some trauma from middle school? Or are you still just a child?"

I was tired of this interaction, it was annoying me. "It's Hachiman. But why do you care? Shouldn't you be worrying about your breakup or whatever that scene was earlier?"

That should get her off her case. Salt on the wound, they call it.

Surprisingly, she let out a short giggle.

"He's an asshole anyway, I needed an excuse to ditch his sorry persona. I can even play the victim card with that one, and maybe then the students here will have a slight ounce of respect for me. Although really, I could care less about what they think of me." She leaned back in my chair, glancing at the ceiling for a second.

"What are you, in some position of power or something? Are you a dirty politician? Student council president? There has to be a good reason as to why nobody has respect for you." I replied, glancing out my window.

I was honestly surprised at how calm I was to have a girl in my room, a pretty one at that. No sweaty palms, no shivering, I was just talking. That hasn't happened ever, save Komachi. This has to be a record or something. Quick, let me write it down so someone will believe me for once!

Or maybe she's just too stuck up for me to care.

"Oh, so you're assuming that nobody has respect for me, even though I'm arriving here as one of the most proficient students this university has ever had? You're despicable." She huffed, turning the other direction and pulling her phone out.

So she'll get mad at that, but not my quip about her guy friend?' This girl is stupid.

I rose from my bed, walking over to the desk she was sitting at. I stared at the abomination in front of me. Papers strewn everywhere, eight tabs open on my laptop, a stack of books on the corner, an annoying girl behind me. What a mess. I grabbed a book from the table, ignoring her curious stare.

I went back to my bed, sitting down and beginning to read. Yes, there was a girl in my room. Yes, I was reading.

I hated her guts.

We sat together in silence for a few more minutes, the occasional notification going off on her phone to match the audible flip of the pages turning in my novel.

My annoyance was at its limit.

"Can you mute your phone or something if you're going to sit here like that, Yukino?"

She instantly stood up, an icy aura radiating from her person once more. She stared me down, ready to kill.

"I think it's time for me to go. Thank you for having me." She scrawled on a sheet of paper nearby, turning her back toward me.

dontlookhachimandontlookhachiman

My brain is giving me a plethora of warning signals. This girl should not be writing her number on that paper. Something has to be going wrong.

I had a minor flashback to middle school. We were exchanging numbers in class, and I stood there, phone in hand, facing nobody.

A girl turned toward me, seeing me stare at her. She awkwardly perked up, meeting my stare.

"O-oh, Hikigaya-san! Do you want my number, too?"

I was led astray.

Every day, I texted her. I came up with random excuses to text her. She never responded. It was a scene straight out of a horror story, or the backstory of an evil supervillain.

I snapped out of my thoughts, noticing that Yukino was speaking to me.

"-for some of us, in a way. I've been dreading our current situation, but I've chosen to deal with you out of pity, Hachiman." She shot an innocent look my way, signaling her sarcasm.

If her spicy tone wasn't enough, sheesh.

Surprisingly enough, after the comment, she gave me a gentle smile. Butterflies rushed into my stomach.

"Have a good night." She paused and stared for a second, before waving at me and taking her leave. Her footsteps resounded through the hall, audibly fading until I heard the door next to mine shut.

That ended up becoming an interesting turn of events, I dare say.

I quizzically glanced at the paper she scrawled on across the room, but I couldn't really see it. I stood, walking over to it. I read it in my mind, mentally facepalming.

You probably thought this was my number, didn't you. That's funny.

Damn. Just my luck, anyway. That'll be a good story for my grandkids in seventy years.

Honestly, now that I thought about it, if I was going to have to deal with this for four more years, I'm not too certain if I want to keep going. It's not even the first day and this is already horrible.

I went back to my computer, continuing to search for a club after that odd interaction.

Eventually though, after a short while, my eyes began to get a bit heavy.

That's enough life for today.


Heyo, Regalithy here.

It's been a minute since I last wrote. Whoops.

My mind was kind of teetering on what I should write next, and then I decided to write this after finishing the anime. I forgot how much I loved this show. I'm now starting to read the LN's, just finished vol. 2.

I'm experimenting with first person writing. I haven't done it before, so if you notice any hiccups or mistakes just let me know.

ID ALSO LIKE TO MENTION that in this fic, Yukino and pretty much every prominent character are from the US, or have been in the US for an extended period of time. I'm slightly tweaking the character in that regard.

My motivation for this may dwindle once again, OR it may flourish into my first actual story! Don't get your hopes up, anyway. I'll try though, I have a weird urge to carry this one through. My 4am brain says so.

Anyways, take care, and have a good one!

*this is a footnote after me rewriting, but my motivation so far is ABSOLUTELY NOT dwindling