Rated M for Everything. Disclaimer: I do not own Power Rangers.
Please Read and Review.
-x-
CHAPTER NINE
What I Needed to Come Back Here For
Tommy's House
Wednesday, July 4th , 10:43am
Reefside, CA
2010
"This never would have happened if Trini had planned it." He called out from his bedroom.
"Jason asked for it. It was our favorite growing up." She shouted back to him, the metallic clang of bowls being shuffled in their stacks chimed liked bells throughout the kitchen.
"What did you say you needed again?" He yelled.
Kim spun around the kitchen anxiously, trying to find all the utensils and things she'd need before Tommy returned from the store. If that ever happened.
Her eyes shot back to the clock on the wall. "The store is gonna close—"
"Grocery shopping on the fourth of July is the dumbest—
"Tommy please hurry up—"
"This damn bean dip better be worth it…" he muttered, shutting the door behind him as he entered the kitchen. He set his things down on the table, still tucking in his shirt.
She glanced back at him over her shoulder, setting up the bowls and measuring spoons on the counter.
"You're sure you don't need me to write it down for you?"
"No time. The store is gonna close," He teased, moving to the back door to retrieve his keys.
She shot him a dirty look.
He laughed. "Kim, I got it. Hit me."
She rolled her eyes. He nodded along as she paused in front of the sink and ticked off the things she'd need from the store.
Ever mindful of his notorious memory, Tommy began mumbling the items back to himself on a loop. Kim eyed him carefully.
Nodding, the list repeating over and over. He picked up his sunglasses and wallet from the table, crossed back to her, kissed her on the lips, and turned to leave.
"I'll be back in bit, I love you," he said.
He resumed his mumbling and heading out the kitchen.
Kim stood frozen in shock for several minutes.
What the—
Tommy reappeared. Kim blinked back at him dumbly, barely hearing him as he finally broke the silence.
"Did I just—"
He hadn't even questioned it when he'd done it. As if he'd done it a thousand times. As if this is was routine.
Kim nodded. At least she thought she nodded. Her brain was still a bit scrambled.
He said nothing else, turning to leave once more.
She barely registered him leave as her hand flew to her face, her fingers absently tracing her lips. Her heart thumping in her chest.
-x-
Scott's Residence
Wednesday, July 4th, 2:05pm
Reefside, CA
2010
"HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!"
Kim and Tommy were greeted by the loud shouts and welcomes of the whole gang as Jason held the door open at their arrival.
Kisses to the cheek, hugs, squeals of delight, high-fives were ablaze as everyone crowded right at the entrance to reunite with their friends. Howie and Vanessa ambling around by everyone's feet.
They did this every time the fourth rolled around, as if most of them hadn't just spent the last few days and weeks together already.
"Come in, come in!" Jason motioned with a wave of his arm. Tommy allowed Kimberly through the door first before following, Miles in tow.
"Sheeny!" Miles squealed, hands out as Trini reached for him. Tommy happily handed the boy off to his godmother before pressing the front door shut behind him.
Sheeny, as Miles had a time with her name, cooed excitedly as she smiled back at the boy.
"Who's my guy? Who's my guy?"
"Hey Kimmy," Jason said, planting a kiss to her cheek.
"Hey," she greeted in return. She caught Howie's curious glance and smiled.
Jason pointed to the item in her hands. "Is that what I think it is?" he asked hopefully. Kim rolled her eyes.
"You're lucky you're my favorite," She grumbled. He smiled and relieved her of the bowl, squeezing himself through the crowd to deliver it to the kitchen.
Zack hugged Kim tightly, swaying her in his arms.
Billy pulled back from his hug with Tommy as Kat walked up and greeted him next.
Trini wandered over to Howie and Vanessa by the sofa, setting Miles down so he could greet them.
Aisha pulled Zack off of Kim with a roll of her eyes, "Excuse me, it's my turn now."
Kim laughed heartily as she trapped Aisha in a tight hug, "Hi Ish."
Rocky grabbed Tommy's face in his hands and proceeded to give him a kiss on either cheek before diving into a mumbled Godfather impression.
"And may their first child, be a masculine child…"
"Shut up," Tommy rolled his eyes as he pried Rocky's hands off his face before giving the younger man a hug. "Good to see you again, bro,"
"You too, man."
Billy and Kat exchanged their hugs with Kimberly before filtering off.
Jason returned a few seconds later, his arm held above the throng of people as his hand connected with Tommy's .
Trini perched herself on the arm of the sofa. Laughing as she watched Aisha and Miles play a game of speed slap. She looked up in her reverie and caught Kim's eye.
Kim mouthed something to her, slyly pointing in Tommy's direction. Trini smirked and motioned with her a thumb over her shoulder.
"Kim, Aisha, could I get a hand with the kids real fast?" She didn't wait. She lifted Howie and started for the den.
Kim inched her way through the crowd as Aisha nodded, hoisting Miles in her arms and followed. Kim snatched up Vanessa on her way.
Jason and Tommy watched the three girls head off for a moment before Jason turned back to face his friend.
"How's it going, bro?" Jason asked.
Tommy nodded. "Good. Everything's good."
"Things still okay with Kim?"
Tommy's voice hitched as he nodded, "Uh huh."
Jason snickered. "You sure?"
Tommy balked. "Yeah, yeah. Nothing to worry about."
"WHAT?!" Trini shrieked.
"Would you hush up?" Kim glared. Her eyes shot to the shuttered galley doors that divided them from the kitchen. They were hardly sound proof, even when shut.
Aisha stood back up from setting Miles down in the playpen with the twins.
"Wait, like, just now?" Aisha asked.
"Yes, like, a couple hours before we left," Kim whispered harshly.
"And what did you say?"
Kim blustered. "Nothing. I was too stunned. He had to rush to the store to get the stuff for the dip. And then when he got back, I was in the shower and by the time I got out to make the food, he was getting Miles ready, and then it was time to leave."
"And you guys didn't talk about it in the car ride over?"
"Nope. Not a word."
Aisha laughed. Trini shook her head in stunned glee.
Jason, Tommy ran into the den.
"What happened?"
"Is everything ok? The kids ok?"
The girls spun to see the two men staring back at them in concern.
Aisha sauntered past Tommy, a smirk firmly planted on her face. "You big mouth thirsty boy."
She gave him two congratulatory slaps to his chest and headed back to the living room.
Kim rolled her eyes. "And my subtly sucks?"
Tommy watched Aisha go before turning back to face the others.
Jason locked eyes with his wife who had yet to wipe the shit-eating grin off her face.
Kim sighed and covered her face with her hand.
Tommy rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly as he realized what was happening.
For once, Jason seemed to be the last to know. "What the hell is going on?"
Suddenly, Trini was back to business. "Why don't you and I start getting everything ready for dinner, yeah?"
She threaded an arm through Jason's, pulling him away as he stumbled backward, the confused scowl he wore never leaving his face until he and Trini disappeared down the hall.
Tommy laughed as he watched them leave before he turned back to nervously glance at Kim.
Her head was down, but he could see she had a smile on her face.
He cleared his throat and her head shot up to face him.
She bit her lip before releasing a small chuckle.
"I'm sorry," she said, motioning back to where Trini had dragged off Jason.
"I shouldn't have—God, you'd think by now I'd have the guts to face you after all these years instead of gossiping with my girlfriends like we're twelve."
He laughed. "Yeah, well…"
Miles, Howie, and Vanessa looked up as Tommy waved at them. They all waved back before resuming their block tower.
Kim got distracted by the children too for a moment, smiling absently as the toddlers busied themselves.
"You—you caught me off guard, I guess." Kim said after another minute.
Tommy nodded with a wry laugh. "Caught myself off guard…"
"I know we've been—" Kim started. "I mean it shouldn't have been that surprising I just—"
He nodded along. "I wasn't even thinking, Kim. I'm sorry."
Her face fell ever so slightly at his calm tone. "Right. Like, force of habit?" She offered.
He snickered. "Sure." They both knew that hadn't been entirely the case.
"Hey you two," Trini reappeared suddenly. "Jason's gonna start firing up the grill outside, we're all headed that way."
Kim and Tommy gave each other one last look before turning to address their friend.
Kim spoke up first. "How can we help?"
Trini was at the playpen, unlatching the safety gate as the kids tumbled out.
"Umm, maybe see if Billy or Aisha could use a hand carrying stuff out to the porch?"
Trini didn't wait as Howie and Vanessa toddled out from their plastic confine, Miles just a few steps behind them.
Kim nodded and smiled as she watched Trini and her kids for a second before heading off toward the kitchen.
Tommy bent down to grab Miles. "Hey buddy, you hungry?"
Trini knelt in front of her own children, producing a pack of wipes from her pocket. She captured their hands in her own before moving to their faces. Vanessa and Howie giggled as Trini tidied them up.
Miles yawned in Tommy's arms nodding to the man, "I'm want hamburger."
"Okay bud, we will get you a hamburger," Tommy said. "Uncle Jase is gonna make a special one just for you."
Trini stood up, offering Tommy a baby wipe. He smiled and took it, playfully shoving it in Miles' face.
Trini watched Howie and Vanessa wander off toward the patio. Kat and Zack opened the door to greet them. The sounds of the party beginning outside muffled once more as the door swung shut.
"Down, please" Miles said as Tommy lowered him to the ground.
Miles ran off toward the door, nearly running into Kim and Aisha as they made their way to the door.
"Hi honey, you coming outside?" Kim asked as the boy stopped at her legs.
"Uncle Jase is I'm special hamburger," he said.
She laughed and nodded, shifting the cups and plates in her hands, "Yeah, okay."
Aisha laughed and shook her head as she propped the door open with her hip.
Kim snickered as she looked back to where Trini and Tommy stood.
Tommy gave her a small smile as she blinked at him before guiding Miles outside.
Trini cleared her throat. "So. Kim played that cooler than I thought she would."
Tommy rolled his eyes. "It just came out, Trini."
"So you didn't mean to say it?"
He sucked on his teeth. "I'm sure you'd tell me that was bullshit, even if I did."
Trini laughed. "True. I always have my Freudian-slip spiel at the ready."
Tommy snorted. "Yeah well, I don't think that's necessary this time."
"You still didn't answer the question."
"Did I mean to say it?" Tommy shrugged, "No. But I meant what I said."
Trini gave him a wry smile.
"I don't know what Kim's actual expectations are, we haven't talked about that. But watching everything she's gone through in the last few years, it's like she's been holding her breath. She's more careful around you. Afraid almost. Not actually of you of course but—when she met Erik, I think she thought he'd just be another boyfriend, honestly. Turns out he's everything she used to describe Mark in that stupid letter she sent you. Erik's the wonderful, caring guy. But she had to make Mark look like a superhero to justify breaking up with you. Cause before that, who could compete?"
Trini paused. Tommy eyed her carefully.
Trini spared him a look. One that she hoped he could intuit. "When she saw you at my wedding, it freaked her out."
He merely nodded. "I know, she told me—"
Trini sighed. "No, Tommy. I mean, it really threw her. Not just the fact that she hadn't known, and felt blindsided, but that it was you, with a wife and expecting a kid. You'd taken yourself out of the running, so to speak."
He frowned. He wasn't sure he understood why Trini felt the need to tell him this. It didn't sound like anything new.
Trini shook her head determinedly. "I was so angry when she told me about Mark. I thought, how dare this guy. All those wonderfully romantic notions that Kim always had. I was so afraid that he'd ruined all that for her. I mean, they were whimsical and melodramatic but, still so very Kim. He didn't, thankfully. In fact I think it strengthened her resolve that a handsome prince did still exist somewhere. She was just afraid she didn't deserve him anymore."
Tommy scowled. The thought of Mark still angered him too. The merest notion that anyone had laid a hand on Kim…let alone someone she'd given herself to, it made his blood boil.
Trini shrugged. "So she said yes when Erik asked her to marry him. If it couldn't be you, Erik was absolutely her redemption."
Tommy shook his head. He hated the thought that Kim felt herself unworthy somehow. His mother's thoughts of settling and consolation rang in his head. He'd hardly heard Trini's last thought.
"But then you got divorced..." she said.
Tommy shot Trini a look. His face fell as realization hit him.
She turned to face him directly in that moment. A tired but sly smile crept up on her face.
"I know the world didn't need to stop for you to tell her you loved her. It's not some sudden revelation you had. But it means something different now. And if you want her, honestly and truly, then tell her. Cause I swear to god, if you just sit back and brood, she's gonna run. Straight into someone else's arms."
Tommy nodded. Though the full impact of what Trini had just revealed had yet to truly hit him.
She snickered, pushing him ahead of her toward the patio.
"I do not brood," he glared over his shoulder.
She laughed, giving him another shove toward the door.
"Yes you do," she said, "It's what all of you knights in shining armor-types do."
She went ahead of him and walked out onto the patio to greet their friends, leaving Tommy on the other side of the glass, contemplating the advice she'd just given him.
He looked up to observe the group outside. Jason wrapped an arm around Trini and kissed her temple while he continued to grill everyone's orders.
Aisha and Rocky were nearly on top of each other in one of the giant papasan chairs that sat in the corner. Billy and Kat laughed and giggled at whatever the other was saying.
Zack played with Howie and Vanessa as they sat around the low table and cushions in the center, the adults laughing as much as the kids were as they happily munched on their food.
And then there was Kim, kneeling behind one of the cushions off to the side with Miles in front of her. Her arms hovered around him as she tried to cut his burger into smaller chunks. The boy squirmed and clapped as he impatiently grabbed a chunk off his plate with his tiny fingers and shoved it into his mouth. Kim said something to him that made him laugh.
Tommy shook his head and smiled as Kim clearly moved to admonish the boy for talking with his mouth full.
Now the weight of Trini's words began to penetrate. And in that, he suddenly heard all things she didn't say. How Kim had held onto her feelings for him much in the same way he had for her, even as they tried to build new and separate lives without the other.
He heard that Kim still viewed him as that handsome prince on a white horse who comes to rescue her. But also that she'd been nervous. Nervous that he might no longer trust her with his heart.
It seemed a strange sort of conclusion to come to, given all that he and Kim had shared when she'd first arrived this summer. He thought she'd been plenty forthcoming and honest about their past and this new direction their relationship had taken.
But then he remembered the last part of Trini's advice. That telling Kim he loved her meant something different now.
Though they'd made strong their still very palpable desire for each other, though they'd confessed to having thought about the what-ifs, their regrets in passing. Though they'd whispered plenty of sweet-nothings in the other's ear… up until today they'd not actually said the very words that might otherwise be plainly obvious.
Telling Kim that he loved her meant that she might in fact deserve that grand fantasy after all. That whatever cosmic force that kept them separated, had granted them a reprieve. Telling Kim that he loved her meant he could trust her again. That his faith in her, in them, could be restored. Maybe that was all she'd needed to know from the start.
Maybe that was all he'd needed too.
He looked up as Miles ran to the door and tried to open it.
Tommy smiled down at the boy from the other side of the glass.
"Daddy, come out!" Miles said, his tiny hands tugging on the handle to no avail.
Tommy lightly tapped on the glass. "Oh no!" He feigned, "Buddy, I can't get out! I'm stuck!"
"Okay, Daddy," Miles said seriously. "I'm gonna open it."
He nodded encouragingly as Miles threw both his arms around the curved handle and tried to pull, his small body nearly dangling in the air.
He slid back down to the ground with a hop. Tommy sank to the ground, obscuring his legs behind the vertical blinds.
"Agh! Miles! Oh no! Help! I think something's got me!" Tommy cried out, rolling back and forth in an imaginary struggle.
Miles' eyes bugged as he threw himself against the glass, "Oh no!"
Tommy scooted more of his body behind the curtains, as if the monster was dragging him away.
Miles ran back to the table and tugged at Kimberly's hand, "Save Daddy! It's got him. Help!"
Kimberly stared back him wide eyed as he pulled her up and over to the door.
Still holding her hand, Miles pointed with his other one as Tommy thrashed and rolled around on the floor behind the glass.
Kim stifled a laugh as she watched Tommy cry for help, his hand latched to his own neck. She shook her head in amusement as he lay on the other side of the glass, making absurd shrieking noises while he pantomimed wrestling some fearsome creature.
Miles pressed his face to the glass, "Kimbree's here to help."
Tommy looked up at her and smiled, "Oh thank goodness."
Kim bit her lip as Miles turned to her and pointed at the handle.
"Kimbree can you open this? This is how we get Daddy."
Kim nodded and moved to the handle.
"Okay Miles, let's do it together, ok? Let's save Daddy," she told him.
Miles nodded.
"Okay you push real hard and I'm gonna try and open the door ok? On three!"
"One, two, three!" She pushed down on the handle with an exaggerated grunt as Miles' palms pressed against the glass.
The door, naturally, swung open. Tommy barely had time to roll out of the way and scramble to his feet as Miles hurriedly crossed the threshold.
Kim stumbled as the boy rushed past her, and started to tip.
Tommy swept down and caught her by the elbow, swinging her back up to face him. His hand grabbed her waist to steady her as he pulled her back up to her feet.
Miles crashed into them, his arms wrapping tightly around Tommy's legs.
"Nice catch," she breathed with a relieved chuckle. Her palms braced against his chest.
He smiled down at her, "Anytime."
"Daddy, say thank you. We saved you."
Both adults were staring at each other. Tommy's hands still holding onto her arm and hip. Kim's still clutching his shirt.
"Daddy, Kimbree saved you!" Miles said again. Tugging on the man's pant leg.
Tommy laughed as his son's words echoed in his ears. Kim smiled up at him.
"She sure did, buddy."
-x-
"Bye you guys!"
"Love you!"
"Thank you again!"
"Happy fourth, you guys!"
"See you soon!"
"Kim, I'll call you in the morning!"
"Sounds good, Ish! Love you!"
"Bye Tommy!"
"Bye Miles!"
"Bye!"
"Say bye, buddy!"
"Bye!"
The white door suctioned shut as Kim sighed, spinning around and clambered down the front steps.
Tommy had a sleepy Miles in his arms, the boy's hands wrapped around his neck as he carried him to the car.
Tommy beeped his truck to unlock the door as he bent over to set Miles into his car seat in the back.
Kim came up behind him, her hand at the door as Tommy reemerged. She stole a quick glance at Miles before shutting the backseat driver's side.
Tommy moved to grab the latch of his door before Kim's hand stopped him.
He turned to look at her.
"Can we talk when we get back?"
He nodded. "Yeah, absolutely."
Kim nodded. "Okay. Sorry to even ask—"
He laughed. "No, I get it. Yeah, we should—talk."
She bit her lip and gave him playful nudge. "Okay," she said, turning to head over to the passenger side.
Tommy caught her by the elbow and spun her back to him. Her gasp died in her throat as Tommy's mouth descended on hers.
They pulled apart slowly, chests heaving. Her arms sliding off his neck to rest on his chest while he pressed his forehead against hers.
"What was that for?" She whispered.
He said nothing for the longest time. His breathing ragged and heavy as he pulled her into a tight hug and rested his chin on her shoulder.
"No reason, I just—I love you," he panted, "I just wanted you to know that."
She nodded, holding onto him tighter. "I love you too."
-x-
Tommy's house
Thursday, July 5th 12:56am
Reefside, CA
2010
He rounded the corner quietly, padding barefoot into the kitchen as Kimberly sank into her chair with a mug of tea in her hand.
"I just boiled some water," she explained, holding up her drink as evidence. "I didn't know if it was too late to make coffee so..."
He smiled and moved to the cabinet to grab his own mug. "Tea is great, thank you."
She hiked her leg up in her seat, pulling the large shirt she wore over her knee as she took a careful sip of her tea, holding the mug with both hands.
Tommy set the kettle down as he finished filling his mug, reaching across the counter to grab a bag from the jar.
"Is Miles all tucked in?" Kim asked.
Tommy nodded as came over to sit across from her. "Yep. Out like a light. He had a very exciting day."
Kim laughed. "He doesn't like the Fireworks," she said.
"No. They're not his favorite," he chuckled.
"Too loud? I saw him covering his ears."
Tommy nodded. "He likes the colors but—"
"Is there ever a way to watch them silently?"
Tommy shrugged. "If we watched them from here, maybe. I'm far enough from anybody else they don't bother us. But Jase and Trini's place is like, Roman candle central."
"Headphones? I don't really like the squeaky squealy ones much, either."
Tommy snickered. "Yeah. I used to get more excited about them when I was younger. I think I just liked setting stuff on fire…" he shrugged.
Kim snorted. "Boys." Her mind stayed on Miles. "Sheeny," she mused with a soft laugh.
He laughed. "He still has a hard time with the T-R sounds."
"And Kimbree," she added, "I guess I do have a lot of syllables in my name."
"Two syllables seems to his limit at the moment," Tommy nodded. "Except hamburger. He can say that."
Kim gave a short laugh.
"So you said you wanted to talk?" he said.
Kim sighed audibly. There it was.
Though now that it was here, she felt a little nauseous. "Yeah…" she whispered.
He cleared his throat. "Can I say something first?" They both chuckled nervously.
Bless him. She nodded. His fidgeted as he tried to wind himself up.
"My mom—well, she kinda laid into me the other day…." He snickered at the memory.
"She got me thinking about some things that—well, let's just say I have some work to do. Anyway. This whole time, I've been so ready to argue with everyone. Ready to defend myself. Ya know, from everybody constantly telling me I should just get off my ass and tell you how I feel—"
Kim blushed. She had been given a similar speech too. Though her version probably looked less like ribbing and taunting than his had.
He sighed. "And—it came out the way it did cause, I didn't even have to think about it. It just, made sense to say it. And it's not like you didn't already know how I felt. I mean—at least I think, right?"
She nodded.
He mimicked her movement. Hands shooting up to rub his temples. He hadn't meant to start rambling. In his head his thoughts were very clear. But now suddenly having to say them to Kim directly, it was a bit of a mess. He didn't want to explain himself anymore. But he also knew she deserved one.
"But—Trini she—she told me about why—how you came back here this summer because—"
He shook his head and let out a strangled laugh. He was a bit out of his mind at the moment.
"Uh, sorry. I'm—I'm nervous."
Was that his voice? He hardly recognized it at the moment. His reserve crumbled as his eyes began to water. His heart warred with his brain, and both sides came spilling out.
"Every woman I've ever loved, I've let go. I've let her go. I never wanted to stand in someone's way. I never wanted to be the reason someone was unhappy. And when I finally tried to be selfish and fight for what I wanted, it all came crashing down on me. I held on to Heather every way I could think of. And she ended up hating me. I can't—I won't do that again. I don't know exactly what you came here hoping for. And I know I shouldn't let Heather, or any of that spoil the chance—but, Kim. I'm worn out. I'm cynical, and I'm bitter. And I don't— I don't know—there is no guarantee here. I can say I love you and that I want you until I'm blue in the face, but—you mean too damn much to me to ruin—it's a lot of pressure."
He could read her face. She was shocked. She was embarrassed. He could kick himself for having made her feel like that. God dammit, Why had he ended his thought like that?
Her head kept nodding as if she was listening. But it was more like a reflex. She'd definitely heard him. All too well. An army of guilt and foolishness invaded her thoughts. And she suddenly felt incredibly stupid.
She suddenly realized why her head was shaking. She was bawling. Her eyes were burning. Her face felt flushed. Unrelenting tears fell past her lids so as to blind her, the smallest mercy she supposed, as she couldn't see him while she cried.
"I'm sorry. I never wanted you to feel any sort of pressure. I didn't come here to trap you or railroad you, I just—I came here to make sure of my feelings, ya know? Make sure I wasn't just acting on some stupid jealousy or some childish fantasy that my brain couldn't let go of—"
He grabbed her face and pulled her to him. He kissed her desperately. Both of them pouring every last ounce of desire and heartbreak and fear and hope they had. As if the world might crumble at any moment and this was their last chance to tell each other how they felt.
He heard her ragged breaths even as their mouths consumed the other. Her anguished sobs haunted his ears. He pulled back to cup her face in his hands.
"Hey," he breathed. "Hey look at me."
She turned away from him, as if it wasn't too late to hide her crying. Her lip was shaking furiously and it broke his heart. He couldn't remember a time he'd ever seen her look so terrified and lost.
"Hey…beautiful, look at me."
Her held her chin and pulled her to face him. His face blotched and red from his own tears that streaked his face. He found himself again. The sobering thought of watching her cry had freed him from the fog.
He sounded more composed than he felt, and he spoke barely above a whisper. He was certainly able to get out his words more easily than she at the moment. It made him no less desperate to convey all the emotions he was overcome with.
"I love you. And I will always love you. But I don't know how to give you everything you want anymore. I don't know that it's even what I want anymore. I want you, I know that. But I would never forgive myself if you ended up resenting me—"
She shook her head frantically. Trying in vain to catch her breath.
"No. Tommy, I will never hate you. I will never resent you. I know. I know how hard you try, to make other people happy. Even at the cost of your own, I know. And I know that if we want to be together and it somehow doesn't work, I'll still know that you tried. But at least we tried. Please…you fought for the wrong person. "
He felt like he'd been sucker punched. He was furious at her accusation and yet the words suddenly sounded as though he'd never heard them before…
"I fought for the wrong person…"
His eyes bore into her. He needed her to understand. "Kim, what if you change your mind?"
She wouldn't hear of it. "What if you change yours?"
He fired back.
"You're right. I might. But I can't promise you I will. And if there's things you know you want, and I'm standing here telling you I don't know how to—
She plowed on as if she hadn't heard him.
"I knew—I knew if I came back here—if I could say goodbye to you when everything was over—then maybe I was just kidding myself. But— the thought of walking away from you—of not being with you— I don't want that. I don't know how to do that anymore. It's not the marriage, or kids that I need. None of it would matter without you, anyway. You're what I want. You're who I want. This—this is what I needed to come back here for. I don't—I don't want to say goodbye to you. I can't. I can't do it again. So, stop. Stop being so goddamn noble, please. I am begging you."
He held her fiercely. He couldn't lose her again anymore than she could him.
-x-
