[interlude]

Jasper doesn't hate Riley, but he does think that Riley is a difficult guy to share a dorm with. As the eldest of three siblings, Jasper has been sharing his bedroom with someone else since he was five, so he should be able to cope with sharing a dorm. Except that Riley is twice as messy and loud as both of Jasper's siblings combined - and he has no concept of courtesy.

Jasper has been sexiled from his own room no less than twelve times this quarter and there are still three more weeks to go. Judging by the way Bree, Riley's long-time girlfriend, is perched on Riley's lap, Jasper knows that he will be kicked out of his room soon enough. He sighs and starts gathering his study materials into his messenger bag. He needs to go to the library, anyway. Some historical texts can't be borrowed and he has a research paper to complete.

Riley chortles at his desk, Bree's fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. Riley twists around, catches his roommate's eye. "Hey, General, come check this out!"

"I need to get to the library," Jasper says.

"Aw, come on! You can spare a few minutes," Riley wheedles. He wiggles with a childish whine, bouncing Bree on his lap while she giggles madly. "It'll only take a second! You need to see this video my classmate put together, it's hilarious."

Jasper weighs the choice. If he leaves now, Riley will take to annoying him when he returns, which means Jasper will be dealing with an actual headache on top of tripping over Riley's general mess; if he just watches the damn video, Riley will leave him alone, maybe even for the rest of the week.

With his bag on his shoulder, Jasper shuffles over to Riley's desk, peering down at his laptop over Riley and Bree's shoulders. He ignores Riley's triumphant smile and the bold weight of Bree's eyes as she gives him a flirtatious wink.

"Leah Clearwater - that's my upperclassman - she runs this channel on YouTube that, like, documents her whole life. The shit she and her friends get into is so funny, right babe?"

Bree giggles. "Yeah, they're so funny!"

"Plus they're all so hot," Riley says bluntly, his eyes trained steadily on the video. The screen shows three girls in a dorm room, all in pajamas, as they talk about some contest; occasionally the camera angle will flip, showing a close-up of a bronze-skinned girl as she makes barbed comments. "Leah especially."

Jasper looks at the way Bree is curled up on Riley's lap. "Don't you have a girlfriend?" he asks pointedly.

Riley squeezes Bree's waist, smacking a kiss on her cheek. "Oh, please. Bree would kill me for a chance to date Leah, and I don't blame her," Riley says, wagging his eyebrows when Bree looks at him.

Jasper's skin crawls. These two are made for each other.

"It wouldn't be cheating, would it baby? If it was with Leah?"

"She can be your exception. I don't mind."

"You're the best girl, aren't you?"

"Oh, Riley…"

But Jasper isn't really paying attention to the couple anymore. There is one girl, the one who seems to be at the center of this video, who has snagged his attention. Riley was right in saying all the girls are attractive - but there is something about this one that hooks an anchor right around Jasper's gut.

That's a very pretty girl, he thinks, unable to tear his eyes away. When the video ends, he actually feels disappointed, even as he makes a hasty retreat from his dorm.

And that's why, instead of studying at the library like he planned, he finds Leah Clearwater's YouTube channel, ClarityIsClear, plugs his earbuds into his phone, and begins furtively watching videos.

It's just curiosity. That's all.

Jasper scrolls through the videos on the channel and picks out the first one that catches his eye.


[YouTube Video]

Swan Says Home Improvement Shows Are Liars
ClarityIsClear
857k Views / Posted 6 years ago

(The camera bobs up and down with a rush of movement and the sound of feet thudding on wooden stairs. The camera finally slows as its holder turns a corner, stopping to view of a slim girl standing in the middle of a bright yellow kitchen, frowning, lost in thought.

The camera moves closer, close enough to capture each of the freckles on the girl's cheeks. "Bella," comes a familiar voice off-camera. "Bella, say something funny!"

Bella turns to the camera, but looks at the person who is holding it, her green gaze off-center. "What's your mom's favorite color?" she asks.

A sigh. "I don't know why I even try," says the other voice, who viewers can easily recognize as Leah Clearwater. "It's not like you're funny, anyway."

"Rude. And to think I let you use me as a documentary subject."

"Nevermind," Leah says hastily. "You're hilarious, the funniest person on the planet."

"I know," Bella says, smug as she finally spares the camera a direct look.

"What's this about a color?" Leah asks.

Bella turns around to face the kitchen again, expression thoughtful. Her hair reaches the top of her shoulder blades, the faintest curl at the ends. "I was thinking about what to do for Sue," she says. "And then I saw this kitchen…I don't know what my mom was thinking. This yellow is…"

"Eye-searing," Leah supplies helpfully. "An extremely violent yellow."

Bella nods. "Exactly."

Off-camera, Leah's voice sounds confused, even as the camera view zooms in and out at the bright, bright yellow cabinets. "I don't understand what this has to do with my mom. Who cares about these cabinets? We're moving, anyway. They're about to be someone else's problem."

"I know. It's just…" Bella sighs, gesturing broadly at the cabinets. "I see this kitchen and even with the questionable shade, I still feel like my mom is here. She left a mark. Sue should leave her mark somewhere, too. And the new house is a good place to do that, don't you think?"

"I guess…"

"Think about it. I mean, even if our parents have been dating forever, this is probably going to be the only time we're going to be living together as, like, a whole family. We'll be going to college in a few years, right? And if we get into Stanford…well, that's a long way from home."

"Stop being so thoughtful," Leah scolds. "You make me look like a bad daughter."

"Leah, be serious."

"I am!" Leah exclaims.

Bella levels Leah with a look over the camera. "Leah."

"Okay, okay, fine. You might have a point," Leah concedes. There is a pause, and then Leah says, "Mom likes purple, I guess."

"Purple?" Bella's expression lightens to one of amusement. "Dad is going to love this then."

"I smell mischief!" Leah declares. "What did you have in mind?"

Bella leans toward the camera with a slight smile. "Here's what I'm thinking…"

The screen fades to black, and then brightens with a cartoon screengrab, a red tiki-wood backdrop with blocky yellow letters that read 2 Days Later. Then that also fades, and a new segment of the video comes onto the screen.

Bella is once again in the foreground of the video, but this time she is disheveled, her clothes and arms covered in paint various shades of purple, her hair woven into a messy braid. She stands in a different kitchen than before, no curtains on the window and a stainless steel refrigerator tucked into the corner, an island countertop right in the middle. She is looking at the floor, which is covered by a stained tarp and layered with cabinet doors and buckets of paint.

Bella turns wide olive green eyes up to the camera. "This was a bad idea," she says.

Off-camera, Leah scoffs. "No shit. Painting is hard."

But Bella shakes her head, looking haunted. "It's not the painting," she disagrees. Her eyes trail from the camera, looking toward the origin of a lot of sound. Bella points her finger in a direction off-screen and says, "It's them! They're the problem!"

Obediently, the camera pans to the side as Leah travels through an empty house, crossing through a narrow foyer and entering a large room with two picture windows on either side of a red-brick fireplace, which is half-painted a deep charcoal color. The living room is in a similar state as the kitchen, except for the four bronze-skinned teenage boys who are caught in a paint-laden scuffle. Although Bella was messy, these four boys are a disaster, flinging paint around and slapping each other with paint brushes or rollers.

Leah's voice can just barely be heard over the boisterous shouting. "Hey, you're the one who invited them," she says, and then turns the camera just enough to capture Bella, who is rubbing at her head and glaring at the boys in the living room.

"I thought they would be helpful," Bella mutters.

"You thought wrong."

The camera pans to the side again. One of the boys is holding a paintbrush to his face, a soft lilac streak painted across his cheek. He bats his eyelashes at the other three boys and puckers his lips. "Isn't this my color?"

"You look fabulous," says one.

"All the boys and girls will swoon," agrees another, who looks the youngest with soft cheeks and a slightly shorter stature. Covered in paint as he is, it takes viewers a moment to place him as Seth Clearwater, Leah's younger brother.

"I don't want them to swoon," the first boy protests. "If they swoon then they aren't looking anymore."

"But they swooned because they looked," says one boy with some confusion.

"Looking once isn't enough to appreciate me, Quil."

Quil, identifiable now by the charcoal painted across his t-shirt in the shape of a star, whistles lowly. "Damn, Jake, that's some confidence!"

"What's wrong with being confident?" Jake demands, hands on his hips.

"Nothing," says the fourth boy. "Unless they look like you, that is."

"Embry!" Jake growls.

"Sick burn, bro!"

Jake, seeing the naked delight on Embry's face, throws his paint brush right at Embry. "Don't be so proud of yourself!"

Unfortunately, Jake's aim is bad, because the paint brush hits Quil in the nose instead. "Hey!"

"I didn't mean to get you!" Jake says.

Quil looks mutinous, bending down to scoop the brush back up. "Well, you did! Take that!"

Quil and Jake end up in a war of retaliation, slapping each other with paint-coated hands, while Embry watches and laughs in the background. Seth, for his part, tries to get between them and winds up with both sides of his face covered in paint, cheeks squished together.

Seth blinks, and then he shouts, "I'll kill you!"

"Not if I kill you first!"

"You mean not if I kill you first!"

Embry wheezes, laughing so hard his face turns red, hands clutching at his stomach.

Seeming to have had enough, Bella stomps her foot and raises her voice. "Stop! No throwing paint in the house!"

"Yeah," Leah chimes in from behind the camera. "Take that shit outside."

Seth is the first to pale, looking between the two girls. "They have their She Hulk faces on..." he loudly whispers to the other boys.

That's all it takes for the boys to vacate the house, pushing and shoving each other out the front door, and then yelling at each other in the front yard.

"Excellent solution, Leah," Bella says with a deadpan expression.

"I thought so," Leah says proudly.

Bella chews on her bottom lip, casting her eyes around the room. "Now what are we going to do?"

"Chill out," Leah says soothingly. "This is all fixable."

The video fades to black a third time, and once again that cartoon screengrab, this time the blocky yellow letters reading Six Hours Later. When the screen fades back to the video, it shows an image of Bella lying on the floor on her back, staring up at the ceiling. She is covered in twice as much paint as before, all of it dry and flaking off her skin and clothes.

The camera moves above her in a wide circle, taking in the exhaustion on Bella's face. "Hey," comes Leah's voice, followed by a sockless foot prodding Bella's arm. "Hey, are you alive?"

"It's done," Bella says hollowly. "It's finally done."

"Uh huh. It was much easier after we banished the boys."

"Is it really done?"

"Yep."

Bella nods, silent. And then she sits up and bursts out with a whine. "It was so much work! It took forever!"

"Aren't you being a little dramatic?"

"I am tired," Bella declares, her face crumpling into an expression of distaste. "And I've been lied to by home improvement shows. HGTV is a dirty, rotten liar!"

Leah snorts. "That's HGTV for you."

"I'm never doing this again," Bella says seriously. She looks up at the camera, a stubborn set to her jaw. "Leah, promise me you won't let me do something like this again."

Leah's hand comes into view, her skin just as covered in paint as Bella's, and pats the top of Bella's head. "Don't worry," she says with poorly concealed amusement. "The next time you get an idea into your fool head, I'll be happy to remind you of all your mistakes."

"You're so kind," Bella says sarcastically.

"I know, right?"

Bella groans and flops back onto the floor. She can be heard muttering never again as she looks up at the ceiling. But soon enough the camera is turning away, panning through the empty house. This time there are clear improvements; the brick of the fireplace is coated in charcoal; one living room wall is deep aubergine, the others a dove grey; the grey continues into the foyer and the kitchen, where it compliments the white backsplash; the cabinets are two-toned, a muted plum on the shelving and a soft, grayish lilac on the doors. Then the camera travels upstairs, peeping into the bathroom and bedrooms to show the entire home continues this theme of greys-and-purples.

"It all came out really nice," Leah says behind the camera. "I wonder if Mom will like it?"

Leah goes back down stairs and takes the camera for another spin in the foyer - the camera spins, and spins again, and spins a third time -

And then a middle aged woman with pretty features and dark deepest eyes is standing in the foyer, her hands over her mouth. Over her shoulder a moving truck can be seen, along with the familiar faces of four teenage boys lugging around boxes. Bella must be standing beside Leah, because the woman says, "Oh, girls," as she brings them into a hug.

The camera feed ends with a pause, and then a final fade to black.)


It's just curiosity, Jasper Whitlock. Just curiosity.

He tells himself that he's only watching because the videos are funny and edited well. He tells himself it's a way to relax so he can study better later. He even tells himself that he's not watching because of that girl, but because the videos themselves are interesting, working more like the documentaries he loves to watch when he has free time.

These are all excuses, and they grow more flimsy as he zeros in on all the videos that feature her - Bella Swan.

Jasper's eyes linger on Bella's face as she laughs in a video, and swallows.

"Well," he says under his breath, scratching at his chin. It's late now, his entire afternoon swallowed up from watching her videos. "She goes here, doesn't she?"

It can't be too hard to find Bella Swan - for the sake of curiosity, of course.


A/N: Ah, if you had Spongebob Squarepants flashbacks when the 2 Days Later and Six Hours Later came along, then you know your memes. If not, it's still funny anyway. Fans of the show should know who Jasper is meant to be - but be forewarned that I have taken great liberties with that particular storyline.

As always, be brutally honest. I can take it.

~Rae