Author's Note:
Erm, if it wasn't clear in the past chapters, Sam and Naomi were in on the practice with Mark, Derek, and Addison initially in New York. Sam and Naomi still lived in NYC and worked there through the events of the last chapter, but Addison had no contact with them. Mark still worked at the practice alongside Derek for those 2 months where Addison was sheltered by Mark, and Mark said Addison was still recovering somewhere he didn't know about and didn't let anyone over to his place not to out Addison's existence in his living space.
Yes, this takes some willing suspension of disbelief…
This is also possible due to the fact that Derek has bad-mounted Addison to Sam and Naomi many times so they don't ask about her to Derek and/or Mark as much anymore…
bobbiejelly
CHAPTER CONTENT WARNING:
SKIP TO THE TITLE CARD AT YOUR OWN RISK IF YOU DO NOT WANT SPOILERS.
MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD SO CHOOSE WHAT YOU NEED.
It gets worse before it gets better. Not much else to say, here? IDK.
bobbiejelly
Love The Way You Lie
Derek Shepherd, your husband, hits you- but you stayed until you couldn't stand up anymore. Your best friend Mark Sloan helped you leave him and you two had some adulterous sex. When you see Derek again in Seattle with another woman, all you want is to save her from him. You didn't mean to fall in love with her. She wasn't supposed to fall in love with you, either. But you both did, anyway.
-Addison Forbes Montgomery, for Meredith Grey
MerAdd. Meddison. F/F. Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery. Rated E for Explicit. Grey's Anatomy & Private Practice Crossover.
CW: Domestic Violence. Unhealthy Relationships - Physically & Emotionally Abusive Addek & MerDer. Also briefly okay (non-abusive), Maddison & Mark/Derek.
*This story is entirely fictional. Please seek professional help for abusive relationships in yourself and others. Take all abuse seriously.*
Chapter 6: HEY, BROTHER
You run around aimlessly away from Mark Sloan's apartment, away from Derek Shepherd's Brownstone, away from your house in the Hampton's because you know either of them could find you there. You realize you're practically homeless now, and you wonder if you'll end up sleeping rough on a damn porch for the second time in your life, now...
A part of you wants to go to Sam and Naomi's place in NYC because they still live in this city and still work at their/your(?) practice, even though they post on social media they might move to LA someday…? But you don't, and you would never, even before, and not now because you then learn from their posts they are expecting now, that Naomi is now pregnant from Sam her husband like they always wanted to be, and you would never, ever, ever, ever, want to put their future child in danger.
You realize that you have no one else as a friend, not even your work secretary, and you have nowhere to go in New York otherwise, and you can't even go to the office because whoever you might see there might tell on you to Mark and/or Derek…
You can't go back to the hospital because you've run out of cash to pay out of pocket and they kept asking for your insurance and if you gave that to them they'd have your real name and they'd probably be bound to call your damn husband because he's your emergency contact, and even if they didnt, Derek is a doctor and he'd find you from your admission records…?
You call your one and only older brother Archer Montgomery for money. You hate begging like a fucking street person but you have no other option and you're not calling your mother or father for this because they might threaten to kill you, themselves. Derek took control of your finances ages ago, and you only had barely enough in some separate funds to pay Mark for rent and food and electricity when you did. You didn't tell Mark that you barely had anything left; you let him assume you still had everything because you knew he would have tried to talk you out of everything if Mark knew you couldn't really afford it.
You would have ended up on the streets or in a homeless shelter if Archer didn't call you back and wire cash to a bank for you. Archer asks you why you don't just have it transferred to your bank account and you don't tell him that Derek controls all your finances because he might tell your parents Bizzy Forbes and 'The Captain' Montgomery and you don't want all of the fucking' strange Montgomeries to yell at you for marrying away their/your damn trust fund of multi-millions…
Archer calls you every day after that. You get a new phone number in addition to your old one because Derek and Mark both keep blowing up your old number, as do Sam and Naomi. But you never answer any of those calls anyway. Derek called every day that you were with Mark and you wanted to accept every time but Mark took your phone away from you no matter how hard you pouted and he would stay strong and you would thank him after the fact.
You notice your mother never calls you. Your father never calls you. Your extended family members, composed of a plethora of 'strange Montgomeries' (as you and your brother used to call them at family gatherings when you were small) never call you.
You're not sure what to think of it all and you decide that family is over-rated except for your brother who is okay still for you at least.
You decide that Mark is probably your new favorite person other than Derek and you don't regret having called him 'the nicest person on the whole planet thus far,' for you, at least, until now.
You decide that you're heartbroken about potentially missing the upcoming expected birth of Sam and Naomi's child. You three would often fantasize in medical school friendship days on how if you and Naomi both went into women's medicine (which you did), that you both would have liked to deliver each other's children one day.
You promised Naomi you'd be there for her when she gave birth no matter what. You hate yourself more than ever when you realize you might go back on your promise, even if it would be all to protect them (Naomi, Sam, and now their future child you'd hate to never meet…).
You think bitterly to yourself that hypothetically, at least, no matter how far in the future that Naomi could still deliver your first child if you do ever have one somehow because you aborted Mark's baby so early that you never even had a conversation about its hypothetical delivery.
You call Archer because you want to stop the emotional pain you feel about missing the best day of Sam and Naomi's life so far when they got their pregnancy test results that you learn from social media was apparently just today (you think that it's ironic that your own positive pregnancy test results ended the best part of your life to date), and for potentially in the future breaking your promise to your best friend and person and for all and any of it...
Your parents think your brother is a failure and that you are, too. You agree with them for you and not Archer but you never say that part aloud to your parents. You tell Archer that once but he shakes his head at you and you don't say it again because you know it upsets him even if you're trying to give him a compliment.
Archer asks you if you want to come to stay with him where he is. You say you'd rather go and find Derek and get a divorce from him once and for all, you've decided. He asks you why you're splitting up from him or you want to. You tell him you cheated on him and he hates you for that. Archer says he's just as bad and so is your whole fucked up family. You decide you're both genetically programmed for adultery, probably.
You wished for another time that you were Susan Grant, your nanny's daughter instead of your mothers but you never say that part to Archer. Susan Grant loved you, and as your transplanted aunt/ real mother it felt like at times/ the only person who hated Derek even before you did, you still love her but you don't have her number and you know Archer doesn't either and you know that neither Bizzy nor 'The Captain,' would give it to you, ever.
So you don't try to call her, because even if you found your childhood savior, Susan Grant's number and called it you wouldn't want her to be in this mess anyhow because you know Derek could smash her to pieces and he wouldn't care what happened to her because he doesn't love her as you do and he doesn't love her like your husband still loves you.
So instead, you stay with Archer for a little while because you chicken out of trying to meet up with and divorce Derek so soon after the baby-not-baby-Mark's-non-child-abortion-incident because you realize he might be able to tell you've been pregnant somehow and you don't want him to know that or for Mark to know that.
So you live with your brother for a while, as he practices as an Attending Neurologist Physician and you think it's ironic that both your brother and your husband both work on the brain.
(Your own brain sometimes decides to try to picture them working together on a medical case, and you think bitterly that they would probably get along at face value because Derek is perfectly charming with his charisma and lying and the two of them never had any problems at your initial wedding years ago…)
Archer still brings home a string of women as he always used to. It makes you feel incredibly ill to think of your brother naked like that so you put on a movie really loud in your headphones when he has guests and you try not to get physically sick from it.
Luckily, you have a strong stomach from having gotten beat up a lot. The one time you got sick from a punch to the gut Derek did horrible things to you, that didn't and don't ever want to ever relive again… (Things that, namely, involved a lot of names and more gut punches and more kicks to your ribs…)
Unlike from Derek or Mark, you hide all your scars from your brother. You never wear less than very long clothing around him and his… Friends? Friends with Benefits. Fuckbudies. Non-Fuckbuddies. Colleagues. Coworkers. Other people in general who are not Derek Shepherd or even for those two recent months, Mark Sloan...
Most of your physical wounds from Derek are at least healing now, because Mark never laid a hand on you, ever, to his everlasting credit (and yours, because you never hit him, but you never hit Derek, or anyone else, either, so you're not sure why your mind even flips to that thought…).
You think that you're lucky, because this means that at least, Archer won't uncover your bruises the same way Mark did ages ago, even before he took you in, then, just because you bumped your hip while you cooked in the kitchen.
You're not sure that Archer would even notice the same way, though, if that did happen. As your sibling, Archer loves you and you always have and you will always love Archer. But it's not the same as the way you think that Mark, despite all your warnings, thinks he is 'in love with you,' and therefore that's probably why he cared to ask about those mysterious bruises back then.
How many times did you tell Mark Sloan you weren't worth loving after?
How many times did you tell Mark you're not worth it?
How many times did you tell him he needs help if he wants to try to be your friend…?
You realize you miss Derek Shepherd. You miss your damn husband. You miss him, truly.
You miss the sex, mostly. You miss sleeping with Derek. Mark only slept with you that one time.
While you were at Mark's place you didn't feel it as much because you always felt that Mark might break down and have sex with you soon.
You knew he wanted you that way, and despite yourself, you wanted him 'that way,' too.
You liked it when Mark had sex with you. You always also liked it when Derek had sex with you. You already knew you were a slut and a whore long before that, and an adulterous satanic bitch so you add that the list of things to loathe yourself for as you sometimes fantasize about any sex at all that you've previously had.
You realize you could be easily tempted to have sex with any number of the men/women/people you once hooked up with, in your college undergrad, and you realize you're running into dangerous waters if you're focusing so much on sex in your head that you'd have yet another affair.
You even miss sex at all, you'd even be tempted to settle for adulterous sex with Skipy Gold again, sometimes, even if you'd now insist on a condom if you were, hypothetically, to see him ever again (he still lives in Connecticut, you also found that out through social media, and he has a wife now, and you're happy for him).
Archer once tries to broach the subject with you, and says to you one day after living with him for a while that, "sis, you look horny as shit," but you tell him you don't want to ever talk about sex with him, his or yours or your family members', and he understands and he just walks away.
You are though (horny as shit), even if you don't and you won't ever tell Archer that - he doesn't need to know that about you even if he somehow does without you saying it, and he certainly doesn't need to know that he was right about yet something else in your life...
You know the only ways you're going to have sex are either to take Derek back and for him to want to fuck you again, to divorce Derek and subsequently sleep with someone else entirely, or to have another affair against him and hope he never finds out, ever, about it.
Logically, those are literally the only three options you have to get laid.
Your head is dizzy with your private lust for no one in particular and you try not to be too obvious about the fact that you've literally tumbled out of bed five out of seven days this past week having wet dreams that send you into orgasm.
You never tell anyone, ever, especially not Derek or Mark or Archer, that those dreams were all about hot sexy women and you and not about Derek or Mark or Skippy Gold or about any men at all, for that matter...
***** END OF CHAPTER SIX
Author's Note:
Yes, the use of 'Montgomeries,' as a plural of 'Montgomery,' is written as a copycat of/a shout out for, AddisonAddek, who does this in many works and I ADORE IT. It's just so much funnier than 'Montgomery's' or 'Montgomerys' and I just love the phrase 'strange Montgomeries…' from one of the stories. So no, I didn't invent it. But kudos to AddisonAddek if you laughed at it, too.
The timeline of Naomi's pregnancy might be a bit off from Canon but we're just going to go with that, here, for the purpose of storytelling…
Yeah, sorry, no MerAdd yet. Actually no Meredith, at all, yet. But Addison is having some lezzy dreams… (The falling on the floor from such dreams is taken canonically from PP…)
I guess I wanted a chapter about Addison and her brother (and 'strange Montgomeries!'), and this ended up being it. I decided to post a shorter one now instead of making it super long and making you wait for another forever for an update.
Let me know what you think! This chapter is named after the Avicci song...
Any predictions…?
bobbiejelly
Dedications, June 2, 2020, Chapter 6:
EVERYONE WHO READS THIS SO FAR AND COMMENTS, LIKES, FAVORITES, FOLLOWS, ADDS TO READING LIST ETC.
Ao3:
AddisonAddek for the phenomenal Comments.
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Fanfiction:
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Ty- arizonaslesbianism, danielaperezsurga, new_being, outlawqueenpercabeth, for the SPECTACULAR comments and stars. JordynMarie05, addiesrep, rene418, for the votes so far.
151 Reads, 27 Votes, 65 Comments. Many people, who added this to their reading lists.
AND THANKS TO EVERYONE ELSE, WHO READS THIS, EVER!
Ps. Thanks to those of you who have PM'd reviews of this work, also!
Ps. New MerAdd fics are up or updated, recently:
Falling Apart, Barely Breathing All Too EasyProm?
101 McDalmatiansFive Reasons We Knew Calzona Was Made For Each Other & Five + More 6 Sentence Fics
Move Over, Derek!... And there will eventually, soon be new Chapters of these ones up:
Second Person (The Diary of Addison Montgomery) Soothe A Seattle Grace Mercy West Swingers Party - Post Plane Crash Edition Out Of The DarkFeel free to check them out, hopefully after you leave a note, and have a great day!
bobbiejelly
