Chapter 3

He and Kurt had made a plan to meet up at his house and spend the whole weekend together. Burt had agreed reluctantly, but he knew that their time living close together was limited so he told Kurt he could go as long as he promised to be safe and respectable. It was the respectable part that Blaine was pretty sure that they were going to ignore.

He and Kurt left glee practice around the same time, but Blaine arrived first, so he decided to get everything ready. Although Kurt had become much more comfortable and confident with sex, Blaine knew he's have to take the lead after seeing Kurt's embarrassment regarding the subject.

He was perfectly fine with just making this experience about Kurt. He found he was excited about being on the giving end. In fact, he had read countless articles about it in order to prepare. He even made a stop at the local sex shop to get a few supplies that might make the experience more enjoyable, although it was pretty awkward. He ran into Sebastian while holding a box of dental dams, and of course, Sebastian made a crass remark about showing him how to use them properly. He ended up going to the checkout counter without them, although he did remember a tip about splitting a condom and cutting off the tip to make one or he could even use Saran Wrap, whatever made it more comfortable for Kurt.

He found himself bouncing on his toes as he listened to Kurt's navigator pull into his driveway. This weekend was going to be so amazing, just the two of them, alone and able to do anything they wanted with each other, or to each other. Blaine felt himself harden in his pants just at the thought of it. "Damn it. Not yet," he sighed as he shifted his thoughts to think of something, anything, to make his issue go away. Rachel Berry kissing him. Brittany's and Santana's sex tape. Jacob Ben Israel in a speedo. No Blaine. You want it to go down not scar himself to the point of trauma. Sebastian buying sex toys. That did it. Blaine shook his head and sighed as he opened the door so he could help Kurt with his overnight bag.

Kurt smiled as he opened the passenger door and grabbed his bag. "Hey."

"No, no. I was going to grab that for you."

"You can get the ones in the back," Kurt shrugged.

"You have more than one? You're only staying for the weekend, Kurt."

"Don't judge me. I happen to know that when we went to Chicago, you had a bag just for your haircare products. That's what's in this one." Kurt said, holding up the overnight bag. "Well, and my facial cleansers. And I needed clothes. That's what the suitcase is for."

"And the little one? Do you have shoes in there? You know, we're probably going to stay inside most of the time, unless you want to swim in the pool,"

"Um, it's supplies, for, you know, the thing we wanted to try. I've been doing some reading on it, and there are some risks involved. So I got us some things that might help make the experience better."

Blaine's mouth dropped open in surprise. "You got supplies? Where?" He reached for the small overnight bag but Kurt grabbed it before he could. Blaine reached for it again.

Kurt bit his lip nervously as he held the bag close to his chest. "At a supply store."

"You went to a sex shop? You-" Blaine grabbed Kurt's face and kissed Kurt's lips passionately. He reached for the bag again and Kurt maneuvered the bag behind his back as Blaine slid his hands from Kurt's shoulders down his back to his ass, squeezing firmly.

"Blaine, we're outside," Kurt said, looking around nervously, his cheeks blushing bright red. "Someone might see."

"Then, let's go inside," Blaine whispered into Kurt's ear and then dropped a few kisses to his neck. Kurt turned to the door, the bag dropping to the driveway. Blaine reached for it, but Kurt hurriedly snatched it up from the ground. "Uh uh. This is for later. Show me to my room Mr. Anderson."

"Not yet," Blaine whispered seductively as he pressed Kurt against the door and kissed him passionately, his tongue sliding in between Kurt's lips. Their tongues danced as Blaine's hands slid down to Kurt's ass, and he gave it a firm squeeze. "I can't wait to take care of you," he said as he started kissing Kurt's jaw and made his way to Kurt's adam's apple before he realized that Kurt had stopped making noises and had tensed a little in his back. "What's wrong?"

"Well. I thought since I was staying the whole weekend, we would use tonight for other things. To plan and to talk about what we want. Plus, we need a lot of prep to do this or it could end up being embarrassing or gross, and I don't want that. I don't think either of us do. So I have a plan."

Blaine nodded. "Ok, so what does this plan entail?"

"Well, first, it entails you taking me to my room so I can unpack. Some of the things I brought were for our exploratory escapades tomorrow, so we need to talk about them and I planned for us to use a product tonight.

Blaine's pupils seemed to grow dark immediately. "Then by all means, let's go unpack."


"So when you said we'd use something in the bag tonight, this was not what I had in mind," Blaine frowned as he held the wax in his hand. "Have you ever used this before?"

"I've waxed my eyebrows before, but I've never used this type before. Santana has. She said it wasn't that bad."

"Wait, Santana knows about this?" Blaine's mouth dropped open in shock.

"Well, I needed to find a place that had what we needed, and I knew Santana would know just the place. Besides, I had a lot of questions and she was the only person I knew that would know about it and not freak out."

"Oh God. she's going to give us so much hell over all of this. You know that she's not going to be able to keep from blabbing about this," Blaine grumbled.

"She won't if she knows what's good for her. I have dirt on her too. We had a pretty intense talk on the way home, and she spilled some things I don't think she'd want me just telling anyone. Besides, she's not as bitchy as everyone thinks she is if you're her ally."

"And we are?"

"We are, I think." Kurt smiled, grabbing the wax. "Now, do you want to do me first or do you want me to do you?"

"That's a loaded question if I've ever heard one," Blaine chuckled. "The article I read said you could just shave the area."

"And the article I read said that's a bad idea because it itches when the hair grows back and there's a chance to get cuts and nicks in really delicate areas. Besides, it says there's more of a chance that you could develop ingrown hairs and that's supposed to hurt like a bitch." Kurt looked up at Blaine to notice that his boyfriend was staring at him. "What?"

"It's just, you really researched this like you're actually into it."

Kurt took Blaine's hand in his. "I'm into you, and this is your fantasy. You've fulfilled mine more than once, especially the time you set up your Ipod in that field and brought in all those lilacs."

"You said that was overkill."

"You brought squirt bottles to spray the flowers so it was like a dewy meadow and talked like Jacob from Twilight the whole time. I almost expected a sparkly vampire to appear," Kurt giggled. "But it was amazing. And it was all my fantasy. It's my turn to fulfil one for you, and I intend to make it as special for you as you did for me."

"So is that the reason we're the waxing tonight?"

"Exactly. Santana said that waxing can be a little painful, especially in sensitive places, and the ass is probably the most sensitive place you could do it. One of the articles I read said that the area might be red and sore afterward, and I don't think we'll be up for anything sexual, after we do that." Kurt laid out several clean towels on the counter and plugged in the trimmer.

Blaine starred at Kurt again in wonderment. "Do we really have to do this? I've seen you naked. You aren't really that hairy. Besides, if we're using protection, we shouldn't even come in contact with it."

"Blaine, it's a lot more sanitary to remove the hair. Hair traps things there you don't want to be there, like toilet paper or even fecal matter."

Blaine winced. "Well, when you say it like that, I guess it's a necessary evil. But I just have a feeling that I'm going to be like Steve Carell in the forty year old virgin, yelling obscenities at you and not being able to finish. I'll look and feel like a-"

"An ass?" Kurt teased.

Blaine laughed. "Yeah. And I don't want that either." He sighed. "You know what. Let's just ease into this. We have so many other things we haven't tried yet, and I'm ok with what we already do. I don't want to spend all this time prepping for this and it end up being awful."

Kurt smiled softly. "We'll do whatever you are comfortable with doing today. But at least hear my plan. First, wash each other and exfoliate the skin. You've been doing that, right?"

"Uh, I'm your boyfriend. I know how important you rate exfoliation and skin care," Blaine laughed. "My parents are grateful that I have my own bathroom."

"Ok, that will make it easier." Kurt began removing other items from the duffel bag. Two new loofahs, a trimmer, exfoliating cream, oils, baby powder, gloves, and lots of popsicle sticks."

"There's a lot of stuff here, Kurt. Where do we start?"

"The articles I read say to make sure that everything is clean. So, we'll shower first. Then, we need to trim. The instruction guide says that too much hair can be really painful and too little can cause you to remove skin. I've made that mistake once. It hurts like hell. Do you want to shower first, or do you want me to?"

"Why don't we shower together? We can make sure we are good and exfoliated," Blaine said with a grin. "Besides, we can have a little fun, just in case the waxing has us so sore that we don't get to anything else."

"I like the way you think," Kurt said with a wink. "But it'll be fine. Lot's of men manscape now. How bad could it be?"

"Ok, I'm pretty sure the wax has set," Kurt smiled as he stirred the wax with a stick. Grab the baby powder and then turn over on the towel.

Blaine removed the towel around his waist and laid down flat on the clean towel Kurt had laid down in the bathtub. "Like that, Mr. Hummel?" Blaine asked, wiggling his ass at Kurt.

"Getting cheeky, Blaine?" kurt teased. "You need to stay still. I'm going to trim the area first, and there's a lot of it."

"Are you trying to say I'm overly hairy?" Blaine chuckled.

"Oohhh, sharp, Blaine. That's exactly what I'm saying. The article said the longer the hair, the more it hurts. I got a really good trimmer though. It's supposed to be the best."

"Alright, I trust you. Just be careful." Kurt turned on the trimmer and started at the top of Blaine's cheeks. Blaine winced.

"Stay still, Blaine. I don't want to cut you."

Blaine pouted. "Sorry. It tickles. And why did you start there?"

"The article suggested starting there first if you've never waxed before. It said it would be a good way to test if you can handle the pain."

"Kurt, I have a pretty high pain tolerance. I told you about fight club. I've never lost a match."

"Yeah, but you've probably never had anyone rip the hair straight from your ass either. It's gonna smart a little.`` Kurt advised as he wiped the cut hairs away. "There. I think that's good enough. I'm going to apply the powder now." Kurt began shaking the baby powder on Blaine's butt. He slapped it playfully when Blaine raised his butt up a little in the air.

"Oh yes, spank me."

Kurt blushed. "Blaine, you might want to stay still. I'm about to apply the wax. I have to apply it a certain way."

"I thought you said it wasn't hot?"

"It's not, but it needs to be applied in small increments, and I have to make sure that I go in the right direction. I need to go in the same direction as the hair so that when I pull it, it goes against the grain."

"You mean, you're going to do it small patches? You might as well tweeze them if you're going to do that. You can do a whole cheek. I can take it. And if it hurts, you can kiss it better," Blaine suggested cheekily.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. It's ok. Slather it on there. Get it all off at once. I don't want you to have to go back over the same area multiple times. I'm ready. Just do it,"

Blaine tensed his body as he felt Kurt grab the lip at the end of the strip of wax. "Are you ready? I can do it gently. I have the oils right here. Tell me if it hurts too bad or-"

"For the love of Vogue, just do it alrea- HOLY SHIT On A CRACKER! Geez, Kurt, how much hair did you get?"

"You told me to cover the whole cheek. Are you ok? And what the hell is holy shit on a cracker?" Kurt laughed.

"That hurt like hell, Kurt. Are you sure you applied it correctly?"

"I did it exactly like the package instructed. I told you it's a sensitive area. That's the reason I was going to do small patches."

"I don't know if I can take that again. I think I'd rather you use a cactus as a dildo on me than to do that again."

"Was it really that bad?"

"Bend over. I'll do yours next."

"Do you really want me to stop or do you want me to try a smaller patch?" Kurt asked sincerely. "Do you want me to go ahead and apply the oil? It's really red.

"At this point, I'd like some morphine and a tub full of ice."

Kurt gently applied baby oil to Blaine's sore, red cheek. "Is that any better?"

"I don't know. Rub it a little more." Blaine teased. Kurt could feel his muscles get tight as he applied a small strip of wax on the other cheek. "Alright. Do it quick. All at onc- MOTHER FLICKER!"

"What was that?" Kurt bit his lip in an attempt to stifle a laugh. Mother what?"

"You know there's certain words I try not to say. Shut up." Blaine pouted, biting his lip

"Is it really that bad?" Kurt massaged baby oil to the spot where he just removed the strip.

"I think I'd rather get my arm caught in a revolving door. How the hell do girls do this all the time?"

"They get used to it. Do you want me to continue? I haven't even got near your hole yet."

Blaine jerked his head around. "I'm sorry but if it hurts this bad on my cheeks, there's no way I'm letting you actually put wax there. I'm sorry. It's like I said earlier. If we're using protection, the hair shouldn't be that much of an issue anyway."

"So what do you want me to do?" Kurt asked gently.

"I don't want my ass to look like Steve Carell's chest."

"Noone's going to see it but me, and it's ok. You don't have to let me finish." Kurt answered.

"Finish it," Blaine sighed. "It'll be ok. Just know that you're next."


After an hour break, so they could eat and Blaine could sit without too much discomfort, Kurt laid on a clean towel in the bathtub with Blaine bent over his bare ass. He trimmed the hair first and then applied the baby powder to Kurt's soft, pale cheeks. "God, your ass is so sexy. You know, if you hadn't suggested the waxing, I probably wouldn't have said anything. You don't have that much."

"Well, then. I guess you don't have to-"

"Nope. it's too late now. You waxed my ass, I wax yours." Blaine slapped the stick down, slathering a small strip of sticky wax on Kurt's right cheek. "Brace yourself, dear." Blaine pulled the lip of the strip firmly.

Kurt bucked his ass and hissed, but he flattened back down."

"Ok, you can do a bigger strip. It's ok. I've waxed before."

"Wow, you sure?" Blaine questioned.

"Yeah, just do it. It's not that bad," he said as Blaine slathered a much larger amount a little further down, closer to his crack.

"You sure?"

"I'm sur- HOLY HELLFIRE AND SLAP YOUR MAMA!"

Blaine cackled. "What was that?"

"You shut up. I didn't get that area on you all at once. Holy shit!"

"I told you it hurt." Blaine said as he rubbed oil on the redness on Kurt's ass. "Are you ok? Do you need some ice?"

"Screw the ice. Just give me the entire tub of icecream I saw in your freezer."

Blaine chuckled. "It's ice cream, not asscream. And I'm not explaining to my mother where it went. I did grab another pack of frozen peas. You threw the other ones away, right?"

"No, Blaine. I put them in the crockpot with a pot roast. Of course, I threw them away. I'm not eating those after they've been on your ass."

"You do know that you're going to be licking that same ass tomorrow, right?"

"Not if you continue to be such a smartas- NUCKIN FUTS! Warn a guy first. Dammit, Blaine."

"Sorry. You need the peas?"

"Shut up and remove the hair from my- WELL MOTHER FU-"

Author's Notes: I might've had to do quite a bit of research for this chapter. I've never waxed before. I hope no one stumbles upon my search history, I'm now getting Facebook ads for Manscaping products and Brazilian wax coupons. No thanks. I foresee one or two more chapters of this, and I plan to publish another chapter of Zoom Mates this week as well. Please review. I love hearing from you all.