Disclaimer: I don't own Leverage. Dean Devlin and TNT do. So don't sue.

Author's Note: See the footnote for additional info about the "soundtrack" to this fanfic

Song Suggestions:

Part One: Sunday Morning Comin' Down – Johnny Cash

Part Two: Return of the Mack – Mark Morrison

Part Three: Little Black Backpack – Stroke 9

Part Four: Sensual Seduction - Snoop Dogg

Part Five: Bulletproof – La Roux


Part One: Sunday Morning Comin' Down

When Eliot woke up the next morning, Parker was nowhere to be found. Instead of trying to track her down, the hitter went straight to his coffee maker and downed as much caffeine as his overworked nerves would allow.

Dealing with Parker always left him feeling worse for wear. For one thing, he was becoming increasingly unsure of his place around her. Lately, he'd taken on the role of bodyguard, babysitter, and philanthropist. The word boyfriend sat at the back of his mind, but he was much too proud to consider the notion that he might actually be falling for her.

As Eliot poured himself another cup of the blessedly black, sugarless beverage, his mind began to clear. Forcing himself to slow his breathing, he tried to concentrate on anything else but the bubbly blonde invading his brain.

Unfortunately for him, his cell phone decided that this one moment of peace was the perfect time to light up like a Christmas tree.

Two texts from Hardison….

Pictures of Parker's birthday from Sophie….

Nothing from Parker herself…

And one missed call from Nate…

Clearly they had a case.

Without another thought, Eliot threw on his jacket and made his way to Leverage, International. He couldn't wait to take out his frustrations on a couple Neanderthals, and he hoped this case provided a plethora of them.

Then again, all it took was one look at all the happy people around him on the sidewalk, and he (not for the first time) wished that he could just take the day off. Partying with Parker had taken its toll, and he'd much rather play kick the can like the kid beside him, rather than have to sit through another one of Hardison's s "presentations". Just thinking about it put the hitter in a sour mood as he climbed into his beat up old truck and drove to McRory's Pub.


Part Two: Return of the Mack

No one greeted him as he entered Nate's apartment – at least not until he cleared his throat. The small gesture signaled the start of the meeting. With everyone present, Hardison commandeered the remote and started the run down.

"Just in time man." The hacker greeted before beginning.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Frank Floyd – the freakiest dude this side of the internet. By day, he poses as a mild mannered business man. By night, he runs a sex ring for "high end" clientele. Creep makes as much as $1000 a night per exchange - all of which goes straight into his pocket."

"How'd we hear about this guy?" Eliot interrupted. "Do we have any inside info on him?"

"We do have a client who can provide us with such." Nate answered, choosing his next words carefully. "however they wish to remain anonymous. No names, no payment."

"Just a whistleblower." Hardison joked before amending – "so to speak."

Eliot flashed him the dirtiest look he could muster. If the person they were supposed to protect was brave enough to help take down a kingpin, the least they could do was be respectful enough to take them seriously.

Showing that he got the point, Hardison wiped the smile off his face and plowed ahead. "Now normally, his male clients range from 45 to 60 years old, while the girls he auctions range from 18 to 25. For those of you paying attention, that's just barely legal.

"Eww." Parker interjected, making a face.

"I'll say." Sophie agreed.

"Now, I've tried tracking down some of his former "employees," but most are off the grid. At one point, each of these men and women kept a single bank account for what I guess you would call direct deposits, but the accounts themselves are overseas and virtually untraceable."

Eliot didn't succeed in holding back another eye roll directed toward the idiot hacker. He leaned back on the couch, attempting to keep his eyes open while Hardison droned on and on about these overseas accounts. From the gist of things, their mark was virtually unhackable, because his "employees" were set up to bear the brunt of the legalities, meaning they would take the fall instead of Floyd.


Part Three: Little Black Backpack

"Wait, there's more." Hardison kept on, right as Eliot's eyes began to close. "A few of his regulars have uncensored photos online, but the website I traced them back to is run by an outsourced company that can't be linked to Mr. Floyd or any of his subsidiaries."

Eliot couldn't take it anymore.

"ALRIGHT Hardison! WE GET IT! The guy's a creep that can't be hacked! Nate? How do you suggest we handle this?" Eliot asked, interrupting Hardison's indignant intake of breath.

The mastermind answered without skipping a beat. "From what Hardison has uncovered, the man does all his business by hand with a little black book - a book which he has entrusted to the care of this man: Caden Smith.

As Nate spoke, a new face appeared on the massive tv screens. It wasn't until Eliot happened to glance over at Parker that he got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. As soon as his eyes turned back towards the screen he couldn't help but spit out the last remnants of his morning coffee…

All over Hardison.

The man in question made enough of a scene to distract everyone from Parker, who was struggling to keep a blank face. One look at her and Eliot knew he was sworn to secrecy – because there, staring back at him was the creep that had hit on his friend a few nights ago.

"Nate, do you mind sharing your plan with the rest of the class?" Sophie cut in, as soon as everyone stopped grousing.

"Not at all." Nate answered reassuringly. "You see, to get to the "king", we have to knock down the "pin". Simply put, we need to get our hands on that book."

"How are we supposed to do that?" Parker asked skittishly. As much as she wanted to get back at the guy, she couldn't help but worry what would happen when she and Eliot were recognized.

"Here's what we're gonna do. Mr Smith is throwing a "business" party for his clientele next week. Sophie, you're going to pose as a high end Madame and offer your services to Mr. Smith. Parker, you're going to be providing those services."

"Huh?" The thief yelped, scrunching up her nose at the thought of "servicing" anyone.

"It means you've gotta seduce him." Eliot helped. Or tried to anyway.

"Why me?" Parker griped.

"Because once you and Sophie lure Mr. Smith upstairs to make the exchange, that's when we'll get our hands on that little black book. Eliot, I want you to tail Parker and Sophie. If they can't get the book by stealth, we'll have no choice but to isolate the mark and use force. In any case, you're going to keep these ladies safe while Hardison gains access to the party via the entertainment crew. He'll be recording conversations and confessions via earbuds to use as State's evidence. As for me, I'm going to coordinate with Bonano, and when everything falls into place, I'm going after Floyd myself.

"Nate…I don't think I can…"

That was as far as Parker got before the mastermind turned on her and smiled, reading her just like a book.

"Relax Parker. It's a costume party. All you have to do is play the part. Sophie will be with you the whole time, telling you exactly what to do. Just don't stab the mark until after we get the book."


Part Four: Sensual Seduction

Nate thought his speech fixed everything, but Parker was far from reassured. If there was any way to screw up a mission, it was to put her in the same room with a grabassy mark. Especially a grabassy mark who would recognize her the minute the masks came off.

"But Nate!..."

"Sophie…Eliot…Can you uh…you know…" Nate intimated, tipping the edge of his shot glass towards the thief. Both took it to mean they had their work cut out for them. While Hardison had the easy job of coordinating timing with technology, they got the task of stuffing Parker in a dress and teaching her the fine art of seduction.

By the time the hitter made it over to Parker, Sophie was already diving off the deep end. "Okay, so the costume is the easy part." She began. "We need something scandalous in the front, but demure in the face. Something that virtually screams slut, but keeps that air of mystery about you. Of course, we'll use a mask to hide some of your features, whilst choosing a dress to put the rest of them on display. He'll want to see what he's buying, after all."

"You sure this is a good idea?" Eliot warned, as skittish about sending Parker out onto the front lines, as she was about going.

Sophie grinned, much like a canary eating cat. "What could go wrong?" She purred.

"All we have to do is teach her how to be a lady."

The hitter groaned inwardly while Sophie began to see his point.

"Parker, all you have to do is stand there and look pretty. Then, with just a few simple well placed touches, he'll be eating out of the palm of our…" At this Sophie trailed off, seeing Eliot's point. "Hmm I see what you mean. Our Parker's not exactly the touchy feely type, is she?"

"HEY! I'm standing right HERE. And I can HEAR you." Parker hissed.

"Relax darlin'. You'll do fine with a bit of practice." He regretted it as soon as he said it. Sophie had that look in her eye. The hitter was about to get used as bait. If only he hadn't fallen for it hook, line, and sinker.

As Eliot shook his head trying to get out of it, Sophie only smiled wider. This was going to be a long night. When it came to exit strategies, Parker was no novice. But this time, she was going to have to opt to use her femininity in her favor. That alone could take years. They only had a week.

"Look Parker, whatever happens, just remember you already have an exit strategy: me. No forks or butter knives this time, ok?" Eliot all but commanded.

"Fine." Parker huffed.

"How did you?..." Sophie started. But Eliot had already decided that if they were gonna do this, they were gonna do it right.

"Give it here Parker. And the one in your boot too."

If looks could kill…

Parker sent a murderous glare towards Eliot while she handed over the stash she had hidden on her person.

Eliot could only watch in amusement. "That dress ain't gonna hide anything, sweetheart. Let alone you."

As they went back and forth, Sophie blinked, gazing at them dubiously from beneath her designer lashes. She was the one who had her work cut out for her. Eliot and Parker would do well to learn to never underestimate the power of a good grift. Or a good actress.


Part Five: Bulletproof

"Stand here, Eliot. You're going to be our mark." Sophie declared, motioning furiously when he hesitated.

The hitter tried not to wince at the sound of his own name. He really hated role playing.

"Now Parker, I want you to listen to me, and do exactly as I say. First off, Eliot's right. You have to be open to the mark. You need to put yourself on display, using your body as the weapon."

Apparently Parker was taking notes, and literally at that. Before Eliot could even blink, the thief had torn her blouse half open, and was advancing on him like a cat in heat.

"Yes! Good. Get into character! But don't be so forward. You want to appear hesitant. Don't give it all away at once."

Parker turned back to Sophie, confused. "I thought I was supposed to make him want to sleep with me."

"You are. But being too aggressive is only going to turn this mark off."

"Maybe you should explain it to her using a subject she's familiar with." Eliot suggested.

Sophie thought for a minute before taking the hitter's advice. "Okay, suppose you were going to take someone out with a taser. Wouldn't you want to hit them where it would do the most damage? Well, seduction works much the same way. You want to persuade the mark to do your bidding by taking him out of his comfort zone. Let your body act as the taser."

"Yeah…following so far."

"Excellent. Now I want you to sneak up on Eliot. Pretend he's your target and you're casing him out. You can't stalk him though. Be subtle. Remember, you don't want him to know what you're doing."

Trying again, Parker kept her blouse open while pretending to check out her surroundings until her eyes finally fell on Eliot's. He tried not to look away, despite the thief's complete lack of modesty.

"That's it. He's noticed you. Give him a smile, then. Exactly! Now walk up to him and introduce yourself as Amber."

Eliot tried not to laugh as he caught Parker's eye and looked away again.

"Hey." She greeted, quickly filling the space between them.

"Hey." He echoed, trying to be encouraging.

"My name is Amber. Is there something I can do for you?"

"Cut! Cut!" Sophie interjected. "Turn the tables on him. Ask about what he can do for you. Make him feel like the man. Now try it again, but with a feather light touch."

They tried it again, exactly as before.

"Hi! I'm Amber." The thief breathed. "What's your name?"

"Spencer." Eliot intoned.

"Spencer, huh? Does that mean you're a big spender?"

"I could be for the right woman. How 'bout a drink?"

"I could go for a drink." She echoed, laying a hand on him. "I'm really thirsty."

"There you go! Now begin the tease. Think of a well-placed touch of the hand like the electric zap of your taser. The electricity travels from your body to his…getting him all hot and bothered while you maintain absolute control."

Following Sophie's directions, Parker placed a hand on Eliot's chest and pulled it down to just below his rib cage. Her chest was practically in his face, but not close enough to where he could have the access this particular mark would want.

"Perfect. Now go for the kill." Sophie commanded.

"How about a night cap?" Parker whispered, moving her lips dangerously close to his. His breath quickened as he stared the thief down. As her body pressed into him, he shifted, trying not to show the effect she was having on him. Still she came closer. Sweat beaded on his forehead as his body betrayed him once again. Closing his eyes, he prayed for an intervention because it really looked like she was about to try and...

"And the mark falls for you without any idea that you touched him at all." Sophie murmured, bringing the two back to reality. "Why Mr. Caden, I do believe you're hitting on my client.".

Parker pulled back, looking rather pleased with herself while Eliot tried to catch his breath. As Sophie took over, mimicking the way she would play the actual con, Parker fought to get her own breathing back under control. She couldn't tell if it was mere nerves, or the fact that she practically had Eliot eating out of the palm of her hand, but she couldn't seem to bring herself back from cloud nine.

Maybe, just maybe, she would be able to pull this con off after all.


*For anyone who is wondering (and for those that are not)…I try to have my song suggestions offer a look into the minds of the characters. For instance, the Johnny Cash song in part one is about a hangover and told from Eliot's perspective.

Return of the Mack offers the perspective of a mark that is rapidly gaining power, while similarly offering Hardison's view of returning to a better version of himself after dealing with Parker's craziness.

Little Black Backpack could serve as a metaphor for the Little Black Book they're stealing. And it also gives us a look into Eliot's mind... (Don't want to tangle with you, I'd rather tangle with him…I think I'm gonna bash his head in…)

And finally Bulletproof gives Parker's perspective on how she's not going to let men get the better of her. Along with Sensual Seduction to lighten the mood.

So the lesson here is, pay attention to lyrics. They have a hidden meaning (most of the time). Though if you're not so inclined, enjoy the soundtrack anyway!