Katara like most girls had always thought about what it would be like to be in love with a nice boy. How exciting it would be when they got engaged. What her wedding would be like. What she had not anticipated was that not only would she very much not be in love with her fiancee but that he would actually be from the Fire Nation and have personally attacked her multiple times. The night of her engagement feast, a night which was supposed to be special and romantic for them, she sat fuming and listening to Zuko drone on about something or other stupid. She appreciated the effort the village had gone to for her. At such short notice it really was stunning. But she just couldn't bring herself to enjoy the evening. The one moment of true enjoyment was when Sokka, Hakkoda and the other men of the tribe performed a traditional war dance. Zuko's face was priceless. He obviously read that the implied threat in the movements were directed at him and he looked suitably nervous in Katara's opinion.
On a whim she decided to do a water-bending demonstration. If she was to be surrounded by Fire benders for the rest of her life then she was going to make sure they knew her capabilities. Walking to the rapidly cleared centre of the party, Katara discretely looked behind her to make sure Zuko was watching. As she readied her mind and took her first stance a weight lifted off her shoulders and she realised how important being a water bender and a member of the water tribe is to her. As Katara moved through the movements she remembered how hard she had fought to earn her place as a master. At first alone without a teacher and then fighting to even be allowed to learn how to do more than heal. She had used these skills to defend herself, to defend her friends and her family and their home, their way of life. Caught by surprise at her emotional reaction her forms faltered and the water around her dipped precariously until she caught it again and kept going. With the final flourish she felt tears on her cheeks and she hoped nobody, especially Zuko, would notice.
The emotional dilemma continued when Zuko made his own impromptu gesture with his speech and the way he tied his engagement gift to her wrist instead of removing her mother's necklace. It was surprisingly thoughtful and Katara was blindsided by the action. She had been dreading that particular moment from the minute she agreed to the marriage and somehow Zuko had worked out a way to prevent her discomfort and still meet the expectations of her people. It was impressive to say the least. It was confusing. Katara hadn't known Zuko to be a kind man and this simple action had thrown her for a loop. She had to excuse herself from the party and barely made it back to her igloo before tears were pouring down her face. How dare Zuko do that to her! What game had he been playing? Claiming to know about what her mother's necklace meant to her.
In the days following the party Katara thought on that moment incessantly. The conclusion she kept coming back to was that he must have been told about the necklace's significance by someone and he had used this knowledge to try and gain favour with the tribe. Much to her annoyance it seemed to have worked. Whenever Katara casually asked anyone if they had mentioned the necklace's significance to Zuko the overwhelming response was that not only that they hadn't talked with the prince but how sweet it was of him to be so considerate of her and how romantic it was really. This only served to grow Katara's anger and hardern her resolve that Zuko, and therefore Fire Nation in general, must be up to something sinister. Her emotional outburst was embarrassing and it angered her that she had shown such weakness in front of the Prince; and in front of the whole tribe. Katara resolved to avoid Zuko as much as possible following the disastrous evening. Thankfully Zuko and the Fire Nation delegation quickly prepared to leave the South Pole following the engagement party so it was easier to evade the prince than she'd imagined.
Having not planned to spend so long at the Southern Pole in the first place, the Fire Nation delegation were ready to set out home only two days after the party. Reluctantly Katara went with her father and Sokka to see them off. She felt pride in herself that she managed to keep her face neutral almost the whole time. She broke only when, just as the group were ready to set sail, the small crowd of Water Tribe members began to cheer for her and Zuko to kiss. The idea turned her stomach and she struggled not to let her discomfort show too openly. Zuko didn't seem to be happy with the idea either. As the chants grew louder his cheeks flushed red with anger and his lips formed a hard line. However, he turned stiffly back towards her, gave a deep bow grabbed her hand and brushed his lips lightly across her knuckles. Katara flushed and had to stop herself snatching her hand back. Forcing herself to bow back she said with a strained voice "safe travels my lord". The title tasted bitter in her mouth. It looked like Zuko wished to say something else but thankfully his uncle called him onto the ship and Katara sent thanks to Tui and La that he was finally going. She didn't know how she would cope once she was living in the Fire Nation permanently; But she would do it in order to keep an eye on Zuko.
The unexpected nature of the proposal and Katara's acceptance of the engagement meant that nothing was prepared for such a momentous event. As such Katara, her family and any members of the Water Tribe attending the wedding were not expected in the Fire Nation for at least four months in order to have the time to make all the necessary arrangements.
These few final months Kataran had thought would be a blessing but were the exact opposite. While she had known agreeing to marry Prince Zuko would involve moving to the Fire Nation, actually preparing to leave her home, forever this time, hurt a lot more than Katara was ready for. She tried not to show her sadness to anyone, especially her father. Hakkoda had been firmly opposed to the idea of her marrying Prince Zuko and had been furious when she had announced over dinner her intentions to accept. He and Sokka had stormed out of their igloo and only returned well past dinner time and went straight to their beds. Thankfully Dad had calmed down soon afterwards and was helping to organise the voyage to the Fire Nation capital. But Sokka was still furious it seemed.
Despite her attempts to seek him out he always managed to be busy. Unable to stay and unwilling to say more than hi and bye. It was beginning to get to Katara. Despite their bickering and their occasional actual fighting Sokka had never just cut her out like this. Katara was scared for the future and suspicious of Zuko and she wanted nothing more than to sit with Sokka and talk it all out and come up with a plan like they used to do. As if they were off having adventures around the world with Aang, Toph and Suki again. So after weeks of this behaviour, Katara decided that it was time to confront him.
She waited for him by the harbour as the afternoon turned quickly into dusk. Sokka had been doing an awful lot of fishing these past weeks, at all times of the day, in order to not be home as much as possible. Katara wasn't surprised when she saw him attempting to sneakily make his way back into the village, even angry Sokka wasn't one to miss a meal too often. From her hiding spot Katara discreetly bent some water and froze his feet in place. She had to bite her tongue hard to hold back a laugh when Sokka almost fell over when he didn't notice the ice dropping his fishing gear and the one tiny little fish he'd actually caught. As her brother recovered and figured out what had happened looking around for her, she steeled her nerves, resumed her frown and stepped into his line of sight.
"Sokka how nice to see you here" she said casually.
"Ah hi Katara, what a surprise to see you, here" Sokka looked sheepish but tried to play it off as cool.
"Well Sokka I thought it's been a while since I've gone fishing, and you've been going so much recently I just thought I'd come join you" she said hoping to get a reaction out of him. Sokka just spluttered and didn't say much. All Katara's plans of subtlety went out the window.
"Damn it Sokka I know you've been avoiding me!"
"Look Katara" Sokka said looking down at his frozen feet. "I didn't mean to avoid you I just.."
"You admit it!" she yelled both vindicated and angry and then softer "Well you did a pretty good job of it for not meaning to" Sokka winced but Katara refused to feel bad for telling the truth. "Why?" she asked. Sokka sighed and rubbed his mittened hands over his face.
"Okay Katara, I'm sorry" he started again. "I was avoiding you. But not because I'm angry with you, I mean at first yes I was angry at you for agreeing to marry that ass-hat of Prince"
"You can't be angry at me for that? You don't get to tell me what to do Sokka we aren't kids any more" Katara was right back to angry again. Typical Sokka trying to be all macho and over protective.
"Yeah I was angry Katara! You agreed to marry the crazy guy who hunted us all over the world and tried to capture Aang multiple times. Or did you forget that once you saw him looking royal and rich all dressed up in his fancy prince clothes."
"Wow Sokka you really think so little of me that some fancy clothes would make me forget how terrible Zuko is?"
"Then why are you marrying him?" Sokka exclaimed planting his hands on his hips and looking surprisingly like their mother. Katara pursed her lips and thought about it.
"I…" It was Katara's turn to look down at her feet. "I think Zuko, and maybe the whole Fire Nation might be up to something"
"What kind of something?" Sokka perked right up at the possibility of intrigue. Katara had not expected him to be on board so quickly. Really she should have known Sokka better.
"Well I don't actually have any proof" she was forced to admit. "But it's just really suspicious for him to come all the way down here just for a treaty signing, and then out of the blue ask me of all people to marry him. It has to mean something. Right?"
"No you're absolutely right Katara. When you say it like that it does sound fishy" Sokka was stroking the imaginary beard he wished he could grow. "So we'll need to get proof" Sokka's eyes were already glazing over as he went into planning mode.
"So you're not mad anymore?" Katara asked hoping she sounded more nonchalant than she felt. Despite her own anger she hated fighting with her brother
"No of course I'm not mad. I haven't been mad for weeks. I'm just really sad that you're leaving." Sokka flushed and wouldn't meet her eyes.
"You're really sad that I'm leaving"
"Of course" Sokka exclaimed "It's hard to watch my baby sister get engaged - and to the Fire Nation prince no less. You're all grown up now, you don't need me to look out for you."
"Sokka" Katara cried and rushed over to throw her arms around her brother. It was difficult for him to catch her with his feet still frozen in place but he managed it. "I'll always need you." She sniffed deeply, missing Sokka's disgusted face over her shoulder "I'll miss you so much when I'm gone."
"I can't imagine this place without you Katara".
"I'm scared Sokka. I don't know if I can do this." Releasing her brother Katara stepped back. This was the first time she had ever voiced her concerns.
"You'll be okay. You're the bravest person I know." Katara smiled weakly "and besides if that Fire Nation bumpkin thinks he can hurt my sister you'll have me and dad the whole tribe, Suki Aang and Toph breaking down those obnoxious golden palace doors - again." That got a proper laugh from her.
"Why don't we talk about it more over dinner? We'll need a plan to figure out what they're up to, ``she asked. It was now fully dark and starting to snow
"Dinner! Why didn't you say so earlier! What did you make?" Food was always bound to put her brother in a good mood. Katara just rolled her eyes and bent the ice off his feet back to the ocean.
"I made your favourite food. Meat"
"You're the best sister in the whole world"
"I know" Katara beamed as they walked back home.
Even with preparing to leave her home forever and her fight with Sokka, the undoubtedly worst part of Katara's last month in her home was the actual wedding preparations. A small blessing was that the event itself would be held in the Fire Nation so there was not too much that could actually be planned in the South Pole. Unfortunately that meant all of the focus was on her. She was constantly showered with attention from all the members of the tribe. Katara spent hours each day talking over what she wanted her wedding to be like and what it was likely the Fire Nation traditions would be, there was a large consensus on very spicy food. She also spent several hours every other day being forced to put any number of things on her skin and hair to make sure it looked its best and sitting through endless discussion with the women of her tribe about how she should do her hair and makeup to ensure she was the most beautiful on her wedding day.
In her heart Katara knew that they just all wanted to wish her well and help her prepare but she was starting to lose her cool. The closer it got to their departure date the more the reality set in that in a very short amount of time she would be married to Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation, and the worse her mood got. Worst of all it made her miss her mum more than ever before. As the days went on Katara reached for her mother's necklace more and more. Each time she did so she was reminded of the necklace she wore on her wrist. She had considered taking it off but knew she would not hear the end of it from anyone who noticed. A small part of her she refused to acknowledge also could not bring herself to remove the jewellery because each time she looked at it she remembered the kindness Zuko had shown in placing it there rather than replacing her mum's. Each passing day she grew more and more confused and angry and hurt. She wished she could talk to her mother.
These waring emotions all came to a head when all the married women of the tribe cornered her in her igloo one day the week before the wedding party was set to leave. The women ranged in ages from the youngest woman named Meriwa only just 17 but recently married all the way to Gran Gran the oldest person in the tribe. The women took Katara to the nearby hot springs, supposedly for another session of beautifying spa treatments. Katara knew something was up from all the giggling going on and the large bottle of strong vodka Amka carried in her arms. To be fair they did lather her up with more strong smelling products - this time it was a powerful mix of whale oil and seaweed to smooth and shine her skin and hair . The difference this time is that when they were done and Katara was left to marinate in the concoction, the women passed around the bottle of alcohol and started to give her their advice for her wedding night - even Gran Gran!
"It will be easier if you just relax. Just lay still and let him do all the work"
"I wish my Nuniq did all the work. Since he's grown fat I'm always on top"
"Hush Tanara you and your husband are old now, it's impressive he can even keep himself up anymore we're talking about a young man here he won't have that problem for years." Meriwa giggled along with the other women and turned to Katara and said in a hushed tone
"If your prince is anything like my new husband then you'll have trouble keeping him off you. It hurts to walk after a while." Much to the young woman's embarrassment the other women had all leaned in to listen and erupted into laughter as she finished.
"That's not just a problem for young men" Gran Gran casually mentioned when the group had finally quieted down causing another round of laughter.
Katara was mortified and beet red the whole time but it was the most she had laughed in months. When the laughter had finally died down again and Katara was left with her thoughts they went unbidden to Zuko. She found it difficult to picture them together at first, in that way. She just wasn't attracted to him. She struggled to overlook the prominent scar marking his face. She knew it was petty but she had seen it twisted in anger too many times to have much sympathy. Furthermore, even in her imagination Zuko was stiff and awkward, not the romantic partner she had dreamed of as a young girl.
Then her mind flashed back to the crystal caves under Ba Sing Se with a young scared prince and young terrified girl just starting to trust each other and Katara remembered how she had wanted to kiss him in that moment. Before Aang and Iroh had interrupted and everything that had happened after. She thought about Zuko's lips brushing across her knuckles as he left all those months ago had how they had been impossibly soft. At first Katara had put it down to him wanting her to touch her as little as possible. Now maybe she wondered if he had been as nervous as she had. Would he be that soft when she saw him again? Would he try to kiss her? Did she want him to? Would he be that gentle with her in all ways?
Zoning back in the conversation around her to Katara's continued embarrassment the wives of the water tribe were now discussing pregnancy. "Keep him inside you after he is finished for a few minutes in order to get pregnant."
"Drink Stoneseed root steeped in cold water to ensure a boy"
"No, Uki she should have a boy last! He won't come to your bed often Katara if you have sons too early in the marriage"
"Have lots of girls, they will be good for the family to make good marriages"
That was the last straw. The idea of being a Fire nation broodmare and her children used as puppets to further political aims was enough to set Katara's strained emotions boiling over and turn her anger explosive. Throwing her hands out wide unconsciously Katara bent most of the water out of the spring leaving her and the other women in only an inch or so of rapidly cooling water. Breathing deeply she looked from face to face seeing the shocked and frightened expressions. She turned quickly and got out of what used to be the hot spring, dressed as fast as possible and ran back to her igloo and crawled into bed pulling the furs up over her head.
She didn't know how long it had been but eventually she heard the distinctive shuffle of Gran Gran entering. Kanna slowly lowered herself to the ground next to the bundle of furs that was Katara and gently stroked her back.
"Katara dear, we are sorry to have upset you" Katara sniffled and pulled the furs down enough to look at her grandmother.
"I'm sorry for leaving like that. I'll fix the hot springs." Kanna grinned and found Katara's hand squeezing it tightly
"Don't worry about that now dear. Nature always has a way of fixing itself. Why don't you tell me what got you so upset." Katara sniffed again and looked down at her hands and took a deep breath to try and make her voice sound normal.
"It's just a lot Gran Gran"
"What is a lot darling?"
"Everything, all of this," and Katara's couldn't control the hot tears spilling down her face "leaving here, getting married and to Zuko, having children. It's all too much and I just really really miss mum"
"Oh my little penguin-otter. I'm so sorry, I thought I was doing enough to make up for Kya not being here. I know it is not the same as having your mother," Gran Gran squeezed her hand tighter and tried to surreptitiously wipe a tear from her own eye. Katara felt guilty for being so ungrateful.
"Gran Gran no I'm sorry. I love you and I'm glad I have you with me but I miss mum too. I wish I could ask her what to do."
"Well, I know I'm as old as the icebergs themselves but I know a thing or two, why don't you try me?" Katara thought about this and realised she had been rather silly. Just because her mum wasn't here with her didn't mean that she was alone. She took a deep breath, sat up a little more and thought of what to say.
"Gran Gran, I don't know what I'm doing." not the best start but it was the truth. "I don't know if I can get married. I don't know why I agreed and I don't think I can do it. I can't marry someone from the Fire Nation let alone the prince. How am I supposed to be the princess of a country that will hate me. And everybody is so happy for me but I'm not happy." Before she knew it the tears were back and she felt small and weak and pathetic. Gran Gran pulled her close and ran a hand soothingly up and down her back.
"Calm down, just breath." Katara took in shallow breaths slowly calming her breathing and her racing mind. When she had returned close to normal Gran Gran spoke again. "Now, let's start with the facts. And work up to the harder questions. You are a smart young lady, the daughter of the chief and close friend to the avatar. You are a strong leader and are more than capable of holding a position in any court. The Fire Nation may have been caught up in the lies they used to justify the war but we have to trust their promise to change their ways. And your presence will be a great help in ensuring that they maintain their open minds. You spent some time living in the country yourself - do you think so little of the people there that they would dismiss you simply for your heritage?" Katara thought of all of the people she had met during her time in the Fire Nation before the invasion. They had been kind to her and her friends but they hadn't known who they really were. Would that change when the truth was revealed? She doubted it but she couldn't be sure.
"Now for the complicated part, your wedding to Prince Zuko. I can't pretend to understand what made you say yes to his proposal but you did. So there must have been a reason. Really search your heart and see what it says." Katara really thought about it. About Zuko, his past actions and his suspicious behaviour now and her distrust of him. But then she also thought of him running around after the baby penguin-otters and their conversation. How he had seemed so genuine when he said he was trying to be a better person and that he wanted his country to be better too. He had promised he genuinely wanted her help in making that happen. And then she thought of the Jang Hui village cut off, suffering from their own countries war efforts and desperately in need of her help. There must be many other towns in similar or even worse states. And Katara knew she couldn't turn her backs on them. Even if she was scared she had the chance to help and she wouldn't waste it.
"I said yes to help people Gran Gran."
"A noble choice, but one that still involves leaving your home and marrying a man you don't love. Will you be happy with that choice for the rest of your life?" Katara didn't answer, she wasn't sure if she could really say she'd be happy in the Fire Nation, with Zuko. When it was clear she didn't want to answer Gran Gran smiled and said "Think on it long and hard, you don't have to decide right now but you do have to decide. Once you have been joined together in marriage then that choice is not able to be undone easily." She kissed Katara's head stood slowly and shuffled back out of the igloo.
Just three days later Katara, her dad and brother and a small selection of water tribe members boarded a fleet of ships and sailed north to the Fire Nation. Katara stook at the stern of the last ship to leave the harbour and watched her home shrink as she left forever. She was sad to watch it go and she was still not certain she was making the right choice.
