I carried the cage dozens of blocks before stoping in front of a abandoned store. Zorro and Nami both collapsed beside me taking a breath, the two having booked it behind me.

"So we're seriously squatting outside some dudes house?" Luffy asked. Despite being tossed around like a sale the rubber-man looked fresh as a daisy. He was also reaching out trying to touch the dog in front of the store.

The dog bit his hand.

"OWOWOW, BRAN GET HIM OFF!" Luffy hollerd.

Idiot. I flashed my hand through the Axii sign. It calmed down.

Luffy started sucking on the wound. He looked more like a kicked dog than the dog.

"Just for a moment." I said standing up. Going through the menu a bottle of Apple juice appeared in my hand. "I'm eating, what do you guys want?"

"Meat!" Luffy responded.

"Booze!" Zorro exclaimed.

"How are you doing that?! Food is just appearing out of nowhere?!" Our new tag-along asked. The red head girl was looking at my hands like I was a monster.

"Bran has Mystery Magic!" Luffy 'explained'.

I looked at Nami as I pulled said food out of my inventory, her eyes growing wider as I pulled out a grilled chicken sandwich. "I don't know how it works so Technically he's not wrong."

Food was passed out and eaten; Zorro laying in his back with a day-buzz, Luffy covered with barbecue sauce. I started picking at grapes before turning towards the redhead. "So Nami, what's your deal?"

Luffy chimed in again. "She's our new navigator!"

"I never agreed to that!" The young woman started shaking her head. She reached into her shorts (very short, shorts..) and threw something on the ground.

A key.

"There, now we're even." Nami said. The red head dusted her hands and got ready to leave.

I reached down to grab the key but got cut off by a dog. It bent down and picked held it in its mouth before walking towards me like a service dog.

Before eating it.

"..." Zorro said. He looked at me and back to the dog.

"..." Luffy responded.

"..." Nami exclaimed.

"... well shit." I deadpand.

Do I know how to sum up a pause or what?

Luffy got a hold of him. "AHH THROW IT BACK UP YOH STUPID DOG!"

I reached out, flashed axii and tried to open his mouth. "Bad do-!"

The dog started growling and a health bar appeared.

Chou-Chou

4

I threw my hands up and started trying to placate him.

'Geralt?' I asked in my head. I tried very much not to reach for the steel sword.I had bad flash backs to ol' Yeller.

I didn't want to kill a dog.

Then don't. Geralt advised.

Sounded good to me. I sat down and took out a water. "Zorro's turn."

The green hairs man looked at the doggie and shook his head before laying down. "Nope."

"Pussy." I threw his way. "And before you say it I meant it like cat, because it's a dog."

Zorro snorted.

"We know. The pun sucked." Nami said.

"I thought it was funny!" Luffy exclaimed.

"Oi, what are you doing to our poor Chou-Chou!" A voice yelled.

...


"...and that's why he sits in front of the store." The mayor explained With a puff of his pipe.

Boodle, the old guy, was brave if a little dumb. He had left the shelter with nothing but a spear and ramshackle pieces of armor, determined to "beat the crap out of" the bandits.

Admirable. Few are the leaders that would face their enemies. Geralt pitched in.

"Don't you have any guards old timer?" Nami asked.

The mayor shook his head. "We haven't had to keep a guard. We rely on the Marines over on Shells Town. Only thing is Captain Morgan's been charging a 'tax' for his usage; we only just scraped the money together for his help."

"Morgan? Whose that?" Luffy asked. He looked confused. And he totally forgot what we did yesterday.

"Save your money, Axe hand Morgan was taken down yesterday." I told the mayor.

His eyes went wide. "You- your saying someone beat Axe-hand? Do you know who them."

Star Wars reference of the day. "Well of course I know him; he's me."

I could feel the looks on Zorro and Nami on my back as I spoke to the man.

"I'd be happy to help, but not for free." I informed the man."

Boodles excitement dried up fast. Like the flick of a switch he became sullen. "What do you want?"

The world crawled to a halt and three choices appeared before me.

I'll be happy to help, for money. (Negotiate)

Why are all these shops empty?

Do you got a boat?

Normally, I like the little banter/ haggle option. Today though... "Do you have a boat? We crashed and we need a way off the island."

The man nodded. "If you beat them you can have my boat; it's the last one in the harbor." He pointed to the docks on the west side.

New quest:

Clowns That Aren't Funny

Main objective: Defeat Buggy the Clown

(Optional): Defeat Mohji the Lion Tamer

(Optional) Defeat Cabaji the Acrobat

I looked at Luffy nodding off in his cage and quickly shock the mans hand. "Deal."

The old man left and Zorro and I turned to look over the dog. I raised my hand to try and calm him with axii.

"So, we're gonna die for a boat playing hero's?" Zorro asked. I saw him shake his three swords loose in their scabbards and did not mistake the looks he kept throwing at Nami.

"We are getting payed to deal with the pirates who attacked our Captain." I told him drawing my own blade. "Also, if you die to a clown you become one in your next life. So don't fu-"

I pushed Zorro out of the way of a charging lion.

I got hit through, through the window of an empty shop.

In retrospect at the end of the day I will realize that it was also the moment I learned that while the health bar can take the hit instead of me it worked like a devil fruit.

You have to do it on purpose. And concussions are still a thing.

The first few seconds I relaxed. The day was hot and the blood felt cool on my face.

Drink something. Geralt told me. I called up some water instead.

"Fuck jokers." I told him after the sip. It tasted like blood and piss. "Especially the Clown."

I walked out dusting off my armor and came upon the Lion Tamer crying as Luffy flipped his discount Simba into the pavement. And I got pissed.

"YOU WANNA FUCKING CRY!" I roared loud enough to hurt my own ears and jumped the guy from behind. I started fighting him like I learned to fight in Texas elementary school.

Get on top, punch until it's over.

So I started raining punches on this guys head as he curled into a ball. No swords, no magic, no technique.

Until I got tired stoped. What was I doing again?

I looked around and could see my friends/crew looking at me.They looked weird so I waved at them. Only Luffy waved back.

"Hey guys. I feel dizzy." I informed them.

"-ll happend to him!" Nami screeched like a child. She was looking at my face so I looked back at hers. Her eyes were a brownish orange color that I found soothing and her face was somewhere pretty, cute, and sexy. I could tell she moisturized and wore little makeup. A touch of mascara and something that made her lips shine. Her hair was a few shades lighter than my families brownish red. I could smell her breath hear her heartbeats pound louder and louder. I imagined what she would taste like.

I wanted her. More than anything I'd ever wanted anything.

Calm down. Geralt whispered gravely. Your concussed and aren't used to the hormones in your body. Take some Swallow and a few deep breaths.

'Okay.' I said. I pulled out the seed potion and drank.

Standing up I held the hand on my face. Nami had frozen from the second-we made eye contact.

You're starting to scare her. Geralt prodded me. Drink another

'Okay.' I repeated drinking the second potion that appeared in my hand.

I immediately felt better. Colors stoped mixing, my head stoped hurting, and I could hear again.

"Hmh-" A wet sob half chocked. I looked at the ground and it took me a second to recognize that it was a man crawling on the ground.

It was bad. "Holy shit." I whisperd.

Absently I reminded myself that the gloves I wore had spikes on them, heavy spikes.

"It's not as bad as it looks." Zorro said. He nudged the guy with his boot. "He'll be okay but we won't if the enemy catches up."

The enemy. Buggy and his clowns. I'd promised to fight them.

I looked at Zorro. "Fuck clowns." I told him.

He nodded with a grin that thirsted for blood. "Fuck clowns."


And here it is. Sorry it took so long but you know... 2020.

Merry Christmas.

Preview:

We walked the old man out of the town and walked to the docks.

I just looked at Luffy. "So you got hit too huh."

He was smiling. "Yup! Except I'm made of rubber so I'm okay!"

Lucky. Geralt stated. The kid didn't seem all there. Something wrong with him?

I thought about Luffys backstory; Shanks, Garp, mountain bandits, getting tortured by Ace, getting tortured protecting Ace and Sabo, watching Sabo get 'killed', watching his homeless friends all get burned alive...

'Rough childhood.' I told him.