INT. SEWERS
Kyle lands with a splash, then gets up and keeps moving, following the other five.
They keep moving quickly through the sewers, getting distance from Q-Beast, still stuck in the utility tunnel, unable to get through the sewer doorway.
Rupert struggles to move his feet, and bumps into Eric.
ERIC: Dude! Keep your gross guts off me!
RUPERT: When we get back, I'm giving Tucker your spot.
ERIC: Really? That's what you're thinking about now? I'd be worried about getting all this shit in your open wound.
INT. SEWERS - JUNCTION ROOM
Stan comes to a stop as they enter the large room, the termination point for other sewer tunnels.
STAN: I can't - I need to catch my breath.
They sit Rupert down on a ledge that's just barely out of the filth as they all breath heavily - fear and exertion running them ragged.
RUPERT: I - we - we thought we knew what we were doing.
The five look over at him.
RUPERT: I mean we tested the Tea Party extensively, before we let that out. It just seemed natural - organic that it would lead to the Truthers - I mean, Barack *Hussein* Obama? How could we not? We thought we had it under control. But we didn't know it was growing into... something.
Eric notices Jimmy looking up at something. He looks up and sees it - Q-Beast, slowly lowering itself down above them.
Jimmy's eyes go wide.
JIMMY: G-g-g-
ERIC: Yeah, come on, get to the point!
Rupert is lost in his guilt to register the harshness.
RUPERT: We never predicted it would grow into...
Eric gives Q-Beast wide eyes, and a nod downward in a "come on already!" expression.
RUPERT: ... into Q.
Q-Beast's tongue spears down through Ruperts head and into his body.
ERIC: About fucking time.
The other four shriek.
They all move back as Q-Beast lands down, breaking what's left of Rupert.
The five spread to separate sides of the large room.
Q-Beast moving slowly forward, into the center of the junction room, eyeing each of them.
Its large form a formidable presence even in this sizable space.
Its tongue lashes out at Jimmy who blocks the attack with his crutch!
A spiked leg lashes out at Stan, who manages to dodge it, but just barely.
Another leg whips out just as quickly, and slashes Eric's torso.
ERIC: OW! What the fuck, dude!?
Q-Beast, finding the weakness in the group, corners Eric.
ERIC: Oh, shit.
He's backing away from Q-Beast.
ERIC: Q is - Q is in all of us, right?
Q-Beast raises a leg above Eric.
ERIC: Ohshitohgodohshitohgod...
Kyle is looking around wildly for something to fight with, when he sees... Kenny, standing at the mouth of one of the tunnels.
Kenny nods at Kyle. Kyle, unsure, nods back.
Then he realizes.
KYLE (to himself): To kill a bully, you must become the bully. (shouting) Hey! Dumbass!
Q-Beast pauses, his leg raised and ready to impale Eric, and looks back at Kyle.
KYLE: Don't you - uh - don't you realize the more you vote MAGA, the worse you make your life?
Q-Beast flinches a little, but it's not enough.
He turns back to Eric, raising his leg just that much higher for the final impale.
STAN: Your religious leaders brainwash you and use you like pawns to further their gains!
Q-Beast lets out a shriek. It almost loses its balance as if it was physically hit.
Eric uses the moment to scurry away, but Q-beast isn't interested in him anymore.
It whips around, charging at Stan!
It raises both forelegs to impale him -
LEO: They cut funding so you and your children end up stupid enough to believe they're looking out for you!
A SHRIEK as it almost gets bowled over with this one, but it regains its balance and turns on Leo!
JIMMY: The economy is in a d-d-death spiral!
It's like it was shoved forward hard, sliding into the wall with a crash!
But it's up again, spinning around, losing the predatory glare, and gaining the look of a feral animal that knows it's being hunted.
STAN: Trickle down is a fucking lie!
KYLE: America is owned by companies that answer to shareholders that want more profits!
JIMMY: So they raise prices and c-c-cut wages!
LEO: Yeah! And they cut your paycheck and charge you more for everything, sucking money out of your pocket and locking it away forever!
Q-Beast is whipping around, getting hit by blow after blow.
It looks like it's actually shrinking - losing its size and menace.
But then it realizes - the weakest link is the quietest.
It rears up and goes after Eric!
Eric scrambles back!
It's charging at him full force, ready to impale!
Eric looks like he's about to vomit - then spews -
ERIC: America is a corporate welfare state!
Q-Beast flies back as if hit full on by a Dragon Punch!
It flips over, scurrying from one end of the room to the other, trying to get away from the five.
STAN: President Trump paid seven hundred and fifty in taxes!
BAM!
Q-Beast loses his footing again, landing hard!
Its legs quickly scrabble, trying to stand up!
LEO: President Trump called dead veterans losers!
WHAM!
Just when it was almost standing, Q-Beast goes down again!
It tries to stand, but, despite having the body of a monstrous (now-shrunken) spider, and the face of Mike Meyers' Fat Bastard, Q-Beast ain't looking so hot.
JIMMY: President Trump's tax cut only benefits the rich!
Q-Beast goes down!
It's as if the fight's left it...
KYLE: President Garrison destroyed the only pangolin that could have saved us from Covid-19!
STAN: Dude, what?
Kyle realizes what he said.
ERIC: I thought you didn't watch it, Kyle.
KYLE: I don't - I didn't - I just... wait. How do you know where it's from?
Unseen by them, Q-Beast quivers a little.
ERIC: I read a Buzzfeed summary!
KYLE: That's bullshit!
LEO: Uh, fellas?
ERIC: Not now, Butters.
LEO: Stop calling me Butters!
STAN: Guys, calm down!
Q-Beast starts to rise to its feet.
JIMMY: Uh, g-g-guys?
All four turn to him.
ALL FOUR: WHAT!?
The tongue whips out, impaling Leo!
STAN: Butters!
Q-Beast starts reeling its tongue in, pulling Leo toward it.
Stan tries to grab Leo and pull him off, but Q-Beast uses a foreleg to slap him aside.
Eric rushes forward, and grabs Leo by the arm, pulling.
ERIC (struggling): You. Aren't. Going. To. Leave. Me. With. Jimmy!
But it's no use - the monster continues to pull Leo closer and closer to its mouth.
Kyle grabs Leo's other arm and tries to pull, but it's no better.
Then Kyle lets go.
ERIC: Kyle!?
Kyle looks at Q-Beast in the eye.
Q-Beast pauses, not sure what to make of this.
KYLE: Breonna Taylor's boyfriend actually used his second amendment right to stop the government from encroaching on his domain while you pussies sat on the sidelines, cheering on governmental overreach!
Q-Beast's eyes go wide in terror and pain - it's tongue shriveling and thinning, easily falling out of Leo like a wet noodle as the monster shrinks down to the size of a withered basketball.
Stan and Jimmy move to help a wounded Butters stand as Q-Beast moves weakly back, away from Eric and Kyle, a scared little monster wearing a loose fitting Jim Watkins mask.
Kyle and Eric stand over it as Stan and Jimmy bring over a wounded Leo.
They see its heart beating fast, pushing against its thin, rubbery chest.
Kyle reaches down, his fingers ripping through its flesh like it's wet paper, and pulls out its beating heart.
He looks into Q-Beast's grotesque, Jim Watkins face...
Q-BEAST (weakly): No, please...
Kyle squishes the heart in his hand. Q-Beast's eyes go dead.
Quiet.
Then a rattling sound.
Q-Beast's head shakes a moment - the five step back.
A little Q-Beast pulls itself from the dead body and scurries into the darkness of the sewer.
JIMMY: It was p-p-pregnant?
ERIC: Oh, shit Kyle - you killed a mother.
