Chapter 11: Purpose


Taylor

This is it, I'm committed.

A final round of cheers was deafened by my heart hammering in my chest.

Uncertainty was a worm that squirmed and writhed whenever I tried to reassure myself that I was making the right choice—that this had to be a step in the right direction.

I walked stiffly off the stage, eyes forward but focused on nothing.

Ozpin gave his final words for the ceremony, the lights came on, and the students were herded out of the room.

I leaned against a wall, swallowing back the memories of every mistake I could repeat. Beacon was my chance to rebuild myself into something else, yet it felt like I was starting with all the same pieces.

No. This was different, it had to be.

I was supposed to help mold the people who would lead the teams that would fight the Grimm and save people, despite all my experience being in making the wrong decisions—or at least, not the good one.

Then again, comparatively, I couldn't possibly screw up any worse than I already had before.

A sad chuckle died before it reached my lips.

It was comforting in a sad sense. I couldn't accomplish anything as terrible because there wasn't anything so grand to accomplish.

How fucking awful; I was celebrating the fact that I wouldn't be honing these kids like knives for the end of the world. Instead, I was just making them into soldiers—

No. Fuck no.

I refused to let myself be that again.

Remnant was technically at peace. The countries were competitive but not hostile. No real risk of war was imminent. Most people had a basic standard of living. Maybe it was to curb negative emotions to mitigate Grimm attacks, but regardless, the care was there for a large majority of the world's population.

The discrimination of the Faunus was a concern.

Remnant's practice of discrimination boggled me. No hatred for sexual orientation, skin color, or culture. But if you had dog ears then it was a completely different matter.

People always found a way to not work together.

Societal change at that level was something that could be helped but not forced. Time would tell.

There was even a universal enemy to ensure that humanity couldn't truly stay divided. One that I couldn't be tempted to try and end, using everything and everyone to do it.

They were people I was tutoring, trying to prepare them so they can live longer and help more people. That was it. They weren't weapons for when I needed them.

I was going to help them learn to stem the tide of the Grimm a little. Nothing else.

Mankind had been killing the Grimm in droves since the discovery of Dust, yet there wasn't any progress toward getting rid of them. I could spend my whole life exterminating as many of the red-eyed monsters as I could, and it wouldn't even factor in the long run.

There wasn't anything to accomplish.

No apocalypse, no secret society, no ultimate threat.

Huntsmen beat back any problems the Grimm caused, like patches for a dam any time there was a leak.

There wasn't anything to trick myself into justifying doing ugly things for the greater good. Hopefully, that meant I wouldn't push that onto any of the students here.

I was just a kid going to school now, helping her peers get through classes.

A red streak shot in front of me and petals bombarded me with all the force of a swift breeze.

"Taylor! Guess what?!" Ruby's excitement was staggering.

"What?" I blew some of the petals stuck to my cheek away.

"We get to be roommates!"

"I thought everyone roomed with their teams."

"They do, but Ozpin asked if we would be open to having another person, and I, as team leader"—she puffed her chest with pride, no, excited confidence—"said yes."

"I guess it would be too much to expect a room to myself."

"This way!" She pointed and walked ahead, almost marching. I sighed and followed.

Ruby was full of sunshine. Someone like me would just drag her down with my own darkness—that went for everyone. I would have to take care to keep my distance, not influence them beyond teaching them skills and tricks to help them.

We joined up with Team JNPR and the rest of Team RWBY and moved to the cafeteria for dinner.

Nora dominated the conversation, recounting every moment of her perspective through the initiation with embellishment in every detail, even for the parts we were there for. Ren, Blake, and I didn't say a word. I was thankful for the opportunity to think things over.

Plus, I didn't have to worry over what I might say or do. Being around people, especially those my age, who didn't know my reputation as a former criminal or Ward felt… more personal than if they did know about me. They would be treating me as just Taylor. I wasn't sure how to approach it.

I caught snippets of Nora's boasting through my spiraling thoughts; I had apparently lassoed the Nevermore and tamed it while the others fought off battalions of Grimm. Then Ruby, Blake, and Yang became a wrecking ball and were fired at the Nevermore by everyone else, which sounded hyperbolized but was the only part of the story that was factually correct.

Aura hadn't dulled the backlash of all the emotional and physical trials I had gone through; or maybe it did, and I would have been feeling much worse without it.

After dinner, we walked to our assigned rooms, which were just across the hall from each other.

Besides the extra bed wedged into the corner beside a desk, it was exactly like the bedroom I had first stayed in. One window over an empty bookcase separated two pairs of beds, two desks with chairs, and a door to a private bathroom.

With four more people, the space was cramped. More so with everyone's unpacked luggage that had been brought to the rooms.

I claimed the bed in the corner and left the others to decide whatever spot they wanted.

We just set our bags down without unpacking. The others had brought decorations and multiple bags of possessions to make the dorm homier. All of us were tired, it seemed, though Ruby was brimming with energy.

"Alright, team! I guess the first thing we should do is…" Ruby's excitement trailed off as she realized she didn't know what to do, before she perked up again with eagerness, like a bulb had just been lit. "Introductions! I'm Ruby Rose, and I like weapons and cookies!" She nodded to herself as Weiss's face met her palm. "I was born in Patch and went to Signal before coming here." She had no idea what she was doing and was trying to make up for it with sheer enthusiasm.

"We know each other's names already. What is the point of—" Weiss began.

"My name is Yang Xiao Long, and I like having a good time and beating up baddies! I was also born in Patch and went to Signal." Yang's energy revived to match Ruby's.

"Does that mean you two went to class together?" Blake asked.

"Nope, Ruby is my little sis. She got bumped up two years by Ozpin after beating up some criminals." Yang ruffled Ruby's hair as she spoke with sisterly pride, the younger girl shying away from the attention.

Ozpin offered her a spot at Beacon too? Neither of us were the regular age for enrollment. He had bent the rules for both her and me, something I guessed he did frequently with those he thought would be useful or had potential.

"You fought a bunch of criminals? That sounds rather reckless," Weiss stated.

"They were robbing a Dust shop, and besides, they weren't that tough. Only the dude in the bowler hat, um, Torchwin or something was a problem. And I would have gotten him if it wasn't for the lady on his getaway ship," Ruby said shyly.

"What was that man's name, Ruby?" I asked.

"I think she means Roman Torchwick. An alert for him played on the news while we were on the airship," Weiss stated.

Ruby had encountered Torchwick? I'd have to ask her more about him and her apparent battle with his men. If he wasn't working with White Fang members when Ruby fought with him, then there might be another group he was working with.

"Well, if I must. My name is Weiss Schnee, heiress to the Schnee Dust Corporation." She curtsied, of all things. "I grew up in Atlas before I decided to come to Beacon for schooling. My goal here is to improve my skills as a Huntress," Weiss stated in a professional manner. "...and I enjoy singing," Weiss finished, quieter, almost hesitant.

"My name is Blake Belladonna. I enjoy reading." Blake said. Her expression sat on the edge of slightly amused and apathetic.

As the others turned to me Ruby's eyes went wide as she scrambled forward. "Um guys, it's been a suuuuuuuper long day. We should probably get to bed now. Don't want to be late for class and everything. Gotta get up early for our first day at school and class." Ruby pointed, gestured, and waved with her words, emphasizing her abrupt fluster.

"Uh, you okay there, Ruby?" Yang asked, leaning a little away from Ruby's outburst.

"Yeah, perfectly okay, super good. Just can't wait for school." Ruby's false eagerness was obvious to everyone.

"Really? Cause you kinda skipped—" Yang started.

"Oh, it's fine. It's just so late so we can get back to that later." Ruby tried to sneak a couple nervous glances at me that were caught by everyone staring at her weird efforts.

Why was she… Ah, that's probably why.

"Ozpin told you?" I didn't put any malintent in my question, but Ruby still flinched.

"Yeah…" she answered shyly, staring at her feet almost guiltily.

"What are you two talking about?" Weiss questioned with exasperation.

"I got shot in the head a couple of times and lost my memories." It sounded even more cliché out loud. "Ruby here realized I might be put on the spot in trying to talk about myself." I tapped the scars on my forehead.

This story was going to sound dumber every time I had to tell it.

"You got shot… in the head…" Weiss repeated, trying to register the information.

Yang already knew and nodded blankly. Blake blinked at my forehead, then settled back into her stoicism, giving no indication of what she thought.

"It's how Ruby and I met. Well, how she met me. I met her in the ballroom," I said.

"How?" Weiss struggled to articulate. "I mean, are you... okay?"

"I was in the hospital for some time, and I was… lucky with the placement of the bullets."

"And you're… fine now?"

"My injuries are mostly healed."

"Huh," was all Weiss could get out as she sat back down on the bed she had claimed.

"Well, I think it's pretty awesome surviving something like that, got a sweet scar from it too," Yang said as she grabbed things from one of her bags. Her focus was on Weiss though, ready to snarl or rest depending on the white-haired girl's reaction.

"So, you're staying with us, obviously?" Blake turned to me with one brow slightly raised.

"Ozpin asked if we would be willing to let her room with us, and I said yes," Ruby stated.

"You should have asked the rest of us for our opinions on that," Weiss said with an admonishing frown.

"Hey, you got a problem with Taylor?" Yang shot back.

"No, I don't." Huh, she sounded completely honest, and there was something else in her tone that I couldn't place. "But, it was a decision that we should have been involved in."

"She is right, Ruby. You should have asked everyone else before you agreed," I said. Weiss wore an air of superiority, Ruby was confused at what she had done wrong, while Yang didn't appreciate Ruby being upset. "If any of you have an objection, I'm willing to try and find another room."

"That's not what I meant—" Weiss looked slightly embarrassed.

"But-but—" Ruby stammered.

"I don't think there are any objections," Blake's amused voice cut through the others. "Anyway, it's pretty late. Should we unpack in the morning?"

"Sounds good. I'm tired," Yang said with a yawn.

We each awkwardly went through our nightly routines, not used to living with each other and trying not to get in anyone's way.

Sleep found me quickly, but not peacefully.


Gray laboratory walls towered up, but starlight spotlighted her through the open roof.

She stood twenty feet ahead. A cute tuft of dirty blonde hair with a yellow dress like sunshine. She was so small.

I had only ever seen her crying, but now she had a playful, childish smile. So happy, so innocent.

She turned away from me. I couldn't see her face, but I could picture the expression.

We stood unmoving for what felt like an eternity, dread building for what I knew was to come.

The gun was heavy on my waist, until it was in my hand, held up and aimed with an absolute sense of inevitability.

No sounds, no smells, no distractions from the moment.

Theo was next to me, off to the side. Out of the way enough to be unable to stop me.

He nodded once in understanding. Acceptance.

Because I had only said what I needed to so that he would.

My finger wrapped around the trigger, purposefully, no hesitation.

Aster Anders looked up, gazing at the midnight tapestry.

I shot her twice in the back of the head.


I launched out of bed, sweat clinging to my skin and nausea bubbling in my stomach. I dashed for the bathroom and retched into the toilet.

Blood pounded in my ears, my breath came in shallow bursts between bouts of vomit and the choked gasps of held-in sobs.

The nightmare was seared behind my eyelids every time I blinked.

It had been for the best, and I hated myself for believing it, for doing it, for everything.

I wasn't sure why those two memories had blurred together. Did I think of them both as mercy killings?

No. I killed Aster just because there was the possibility that she might be the trigger that ended the world. 'Saving' her from Gray Boy was an afterthought.

Contessa shot me to stop Khepri. That was different; I was a threat.

Aster was a toddler.

But no; I lived, she didn't.

Brutal. Cold. Unforgivable.

The fact that Aster wasn't the apocalypse's trigger made it cut deeper.

God, I'm fucked up.

Someone held my hair back.

"You okay?" Blake asked.

I spat a bit of bile out. "Wonderful."

"Obviously." I was focused on the toilet, but I felt her amused eye-roll.

"Damn, I forgot what it's like since I've had Aura for so long, but you've only had it for a bit. I had it before I started getting cramps and everything. Seeing this, I'm glad," Yang said from the door.

What was… She thought I was on my period?

I spotted Yang's hair in the corner of my eye. The radiant yellow almost matched what Aster had worn in the dream. I puked again.

Yang gave a low whistle. "Yeesh. Really glad I had mine unlocked young."

"Lucky you." My Aura shined and the need to puke subsided, but the disgust lingered. I let out a slow breath. "Thanks, Blake."

"No problem."

I stood up and leaned my head under the nozzle of the sink, gargled some water, then spat it out. "Sorry if I woke you."

"It's fine."

"Yeah, it's all good. Was gonna hit the gym anyway," Yang said with a flex of her bicep.

I cleaned up, changed, and snuck out of the room. Yang had left by the time I exited the bathroom. Blake was in her bed with a book; we exchanged nods on my way out.

Another jog to the Emerald Forest netted me some Rapier Wasps—the 'sword wasps' I had used to kill an Ursa. A whole hive had been dug into some rocks deeper in the woods.

The queen of the hive was a larger, fatter version of a Rapier Wasp, that had a slight curve to its barbed stinger with a jagged dip before the point. My ticket to starting my own hive.

It had pinged in my senses, a bell chime amongst clinking glass. Every movement and sense was cleaner, but it was an enhanced perspective of how an insect experienced the world, making it more alien.

There was no biological reason that I could sense, beyond the usual differences between a queen and the workers.

More things I didn't know, more things to worry about.

I had left bugs to sit, awake, at the very edge of my range over night, and they were in the exact same place when I woke. They would have wandered off if my range had lessened while asleep.

So, my power was stuck at around five blocks.

I wasn't sure if it was Aura, or how my Gemma healed, or something to do with my power returning to what it was before Khepri. There was no real way to check, and it wasn't like I knew what to look for if I got brain scans.

My new wasps swarmed out of my armor and into the dens with the rest of my bugs. Some of them began to chew at rock and dirt.

Regular wasp hives were made from pulped wood stuck together by saliva. Rapier wasps did the same thing but with rock and stone, while their spit hardened like frozen sap.

It would be the structural support that stopped my underground tunnels from collapsing. I needed more space if I wanted to weave outfits, and this was my way of not having to find an empty room at Beacon and fill it with spiders.

Warm light cut across the horizon as I arrived back at Beacon.

I found an empty training room and went through a series of stretches and exercises. Many required two arms and had to be abandoned, but I made do.

Discipline and repetition had engrained how my body moved while fighting; I would have to break those instincts to get acclimated with how I moved with Aura.

Also, Aura made a lot of attacks and throws that would normally stun or incapacitate an opponent obsolete. I could stab an opponent's eye, but their Aura might be able to hold the blow off, leaving me open. Most of what I knew about fighting was more or less useless.

Olympic level gymnastics and acrobatics were simple with Aura. It opened up whole new ways to dodge or move around the field, like nothing I had ever done before.

After a half-hour, I was left with a list of all the things I needed to practice and learn.

I went through some Aura exercises described in the school textbooks that had been downloaded onto our Scrolls.

Cross-legged on the ground, I activated my Aura, the shine outlining my body, before I let it slip away. Then I repeated it, on and off until it started down the road to becoming instinctual.

The silence and time let my thoughts slip away. The information from my bugs was millions of overlapping touches as I moved them about. Every step they took, every surface they climbed, I felt it all.

Would this be what my days would be like? Reading over course materials, conducting my bugs in the background through various tasks, waking up in a cold sweat—

The nightmare. I flinched away from the thoughts, doubling my focus on my bugs.

I breathed deeply until the shaking in each exhale stopped.

Aster…

I shook out the echoes of her crying and brought out my Scroll. I had to create an outline for what I would be tutoring the other team leaders to and present it to Ozpin.

Practice scenarios, Master-Stranger protocols, hostage or civilian threat approaches.

I was worried I would teach them to go too far. They should be effective and pragmatic, but would that lead them down my path?

Using everything you can to save lives; prioritizing ends over means.

Every idea I had came with more doubts.

Also, I wasn't sure how much I wanted to invest in Beacon.

Being in charge of coordinating others felt unjust after Khepri, and I didn't know if it would help me be better.

Wanting to do things differently and knowing how to were separate affairs.

On paper, being a Huntress accomplished everything I wanted it to, but reality was never so clearcut.

If I decided to leave Beacon for whatever reason, I didn't want to leave behind half-finished projects that I would regret abandoning.

Also… I didn't know if anyone would come for me, either for revenge or to whisk me away. Contessa must have had a reason for leaving me alive, I just didn't know what it was.

I abandoned any further training, my thoughts too heavy to focus.

After a warm shower in the communal washroom, I got ready for the day.

Beacon had school uniforms.

Red plaid skirts with a white blouse wrapped in a black suit jacket lined with gold trimming.

I liked the jacket. It was comfortable, warm, and flexible.

As for the skirt… at least it was easy to move in.

I tied a small ribbon under my collar and slid long black stockings to cover the bareness of my legs. The shoes were dark brown loafers that were comfortably practical.

Altogether, it was very… schoolgirl. Not something that someone like me could pull off.

Bugs grouped around the vents heard the rest of the students wake, Team RWBY especially, since Ruby was panicking that I had vanished. Fortunately, Yang was back and stopped her from going on a search.

Ruby being worried about me was sweet, but I shied away from her gaze when I could.

She saw others as what she believed they would be: heroes, protectors, allies. She had proclaimed that would be Team RWBY's goal throughout their time at Beacon, including me in the attempt to do a team cheer.

Her eyes, so pure and naively innocent, blinded by the lies she saw in others, in me.

I wasn't a hero. Real heroes didn't exist.

My cynicism would hurt her, and I didn't want to do that, even though reality might.

She was the same age I had been when I started out as a cape, when the world really started beating me down.

Realism was fine, even necessary, but Remnant wasn't Earth Bet. There was time before Ruby would have to face life's cruel truths, and I would only expose her to them faster.

She deserved time to play hero, to ease into this lifestyle.

There was some time before class, so I continued research on Remnant and Aura, and many other things. I downloaded books and articles for later references, one being 'Aura Exercises for Dummies'.

Everyone needs to start somewhere.

I didn't think I could remember the feeling of not having an Aura anymore. It was just another muscle, something that was natural to have, yet I knew it wasn't.

One thing I had noticed from my exercises this morning, was that my brain had difficulty keeping up with my newfound speed, but the others seemed to have no trouble.

Before, I hadn't been prepared for the sudden increase in speed, causing me to overshoot or throw myself off-balance.

I was getting into position before I registered that I had completed the movement. So, I had to pause in-between movements, just long enough to get a picture on where my body was positioned, but it was enough for someone to take advantage of.

Hopefully, time and practice would fix the problem, but I searched for a solution online regardless.

Team RWBY were discussing bunk beds; they were going to be late at this rate.

A flashing icon appeared on the corner of my screen, a message from Professor Goodwitch.

I scanned through the text of the message and sighed. I was required to register an emblem for myself within a week.

A picture or symbol for identification, and it could potentially give sentimental value to my equipment for better Aura efficiency. Unfortunately, I wasn't the best with names or appearances.

There was the beetle logo that was on my Weaver costume… No. It didn't feel right. Glenn had picked that logo, and my emblem only representing my time as Weaver felt counterproductive to… whoever I was trying to be now.

Maybe… What the hell kind of bunk beds are those?

A lone fly ran along ropes that strung up one bed precariously above another. The other bed was stacked on Jenga towers of books, ready to fall over at a moment's notice.

As I made my way to the classroom, I made a mental note to grab some wood to fix the inevitable nighttime bed collapses waiting to happen. I wasn't good at woodwork, but anything had to be better than that.

I sat comfortably in class—'Grimm Studies 101'—when Teams JNPR and RWBY dashed into the room, almost falling over each other in the process.

"Oh, there you are, Taylor! Morning!" Ruby said happily between panting breaths. She wore her crimson hooded cape over her school uniform—which looked better on everyone else than me. I guessed she really liked it.

"Morning, Ruby. Morning everyone, cutting it close I see."

"We were a little distracted," Yang said.

"Decorating," Blake added.

"What were you up to?" Weiss asked with a hint of disapproval.

"Training and studying."

"Oh." Weiss nodded approvingly to herself more than me.

The conversation was interrupted as Professor Port entered to begin the lesson. He was the man who had searched for me in the dockyard along with Professor Peach.

After a small moment of attentiveness, I moved onto making a list of what I needed to do in the short term. Introduction classes usually had no real content, and Port's penchant for telling stories seemed to compound that.

I needed to make an emblem, a task that would be annoying in itself.

Some form of income would be extremely useful. Weapons and supplies weren't cheap. I'd check around town in regards to the criminal element, but I would check if there was a common way for students to get money first. Upper year students did missions, but first years wouldn't be sent out until the second term, so that was a non-option unless I wanted to wait a few months for a proper weapon and an arm.

That said, I needed to figure out what kind of weapon I wanted. One that was simple, but helped me fulfill some kind of combat role. Apparently, it was common to design one's own weapon. I'd have to ask someone about that. If I thought of something, I could get a weapon custom designed.

I did want a prosthetic arm customized, meaning I would need the funds for it. My ride-along on the Nevermore had given me an idea along with what kind of prosthetics I had read were used.

Ozpin's offer to pay was nice, and I understood the reasoning behind why he did, but I also knew the manipulative nature behind it. A debt would keep me at Beacon, unless I wanted to become a criminal.

Also, I didn't think he could justify the school paying for the design I had in mind without some caveats. I would only take his offer if I couldn't find some other kind of income.

Any spider-silk outfits were months away. I wanted to make some for other students too, if I had the time.

Aura training in general.

I'd have to learn about the fighting styles and combat roles of all the teams I could be assigned to. Along with scheduling the practice sessions I had with them.

I looked up from my list as Weiss threw her hand up. Port had asked for someone to battle a Boarbatusk that was currently caged beside him. The Grimm was more armored than any we had encountered during the initiation but nothing particularly dangerous.

Some Grimm, like Leviathans—I swore I'd felt rain on my skin when I read the name of the Grimm—took artillery fire to take down. Other Grimm, with exceptions for really old ones, weren't much trouble for a single Huntsmen. Boarbatusks were the latter.

The fight was quick, but Weiss fought recklessly and in a less disciplined way than her usual attitude portrayed. I frowned as Weiss snapped at Ruby for shouting advice; an out-of-the-blue intensity behind Weiss's outrage.

My eyes snapped away from the squabble as the bug I had nestled in Blake's bow flung about. The bow had twitched on its own.

I didn't have time to consider an explanation as Weiss stormed off the moment class ended, Ruby quickly going after her.

Ozpin suddenly changed directions down the hall toward the two. Interesting.

My swarm moved and caught the tail end of Weiss exploding on Ruby for not being a better leader, despite Ruby having been team leader for less than twenty-four hours. The haughty girl stomped off, leaving Ruby alone.

Childish.

Ozpin swooped in, timing too perfect.

One of the security cameras along the halls of Beacon I had found when surveying the school before was perfectly faced at where Weiss and Ruby had argued.

Ozpin had been watching the interaction and decided to intervene.

The rest of us gathered our things and slowly left the classroom. Whispers about the outburst snuck through the shuffling of books and bags.

Yang sported a tight expression, like she was deciding whether to punch someone or yell at them. From the impression I had of her so far, it would probably be both.

Ozpin reassured Ruby and prompted her to prove she was a leader to Weiss. Honestly, his advice was comforting and correct, but still disturbing given the context of him spying on the student body in order to be there in the first place.

It was almost as though he was manipulating Ruby into being a better leader.

A clammy discomfort settled in before it all became clear.

As Weaver, I'd spent my time making people come around to my way of thinking so that they would be useful. I put them into positions where they would be assets, or into situations where I wouldn't have to worry about them getting in the way again.

Ozpin was doing what I had done, grooming others into being people who were helpful. Useful.

All his machinations with the other students and myself were to engineer good and skillful people to help him with his own goals—whatever those were.

It was a strange otherworldly mirror of what I had done, and I squirmed at the fact that I empathized with it.

Good things for selfish reasons was technically a net positive.

Or Ozpin was being a good mentor, and I was jumping to conclusions.

Still, how far was he going with this? Was he setting up events to force people into situations where he can better them? Was he doing it to have better tools to fight the Grimm threat with? I didn't know what his mission was for all this.

Time would tell.

Weiss had approached Port with her troubles with Ruby. I understood her frustrations. Ruby was younger, a bit childish, and overactive in some ways, but Weiss expecting the younger girl to immediately be perfect showed a glaring degree of impatient pretentiousness.

Port stated that Weiss should work to be a good teammate instead of lamenting that she wasn't team leader.

The two girls walked away from their respective conversations with motivation in their step. It didn't shake the aftertaste of Ozpin's scheming or seeing my ghosts in someone else.

The rest of the day went by quickly despite the monotony of it all. Whole classes were dedicated to overviewing what would be covered, the teachers ignoring the fact that they could have summarized everything with a few short sentences.

I continued my list, writing down ideas, places to visit, things to research, things to watch and check about Ozpin and his agenda.

As the day turned to dusk, I found myself alone on a plateau that overlooked a section of the Beacon gardens.

I wanted to help the people of Remnant, in whatever way I could, but the inescapable doubts of not knowing how and the worries of repeating mistakes ate at me.

The biggest problem was that there was no real thing to work toward. Everything I did would be a drop of water in the ocean of battling the Grimm.

There was no constant pressure of an imminent apocalypse, but now I had time, and nothing to do with it.

It almost felt like there was no point to it, because nothing I did would be important.

How could I ever feel as invested in something as I did before, when it would never carry the weight of what I'd already accomplished?

The day's final warm light fought the chilled touch of the breeze that bristled the trees and flowers below.

I listened to several groups of students expressing their excitement or nervousness.

They had finally started the training to become Huntsmen and Huntresses. Learning to become glorified professional mercenaries to battle a threat that no one has made an impact against for hundreds of years. They were a product of the world itself.

Jack Slash, the Endbringers, Scion, it was all over, and their absence rang hollow.

I had time to collect myself and—was that the reason I was here?

Were Remnant and Beacon places for me to recover enough before Contessa returned for me?

I shook the thought away. The other students weren't just tools for my recovery. Even if Contessa meant for them to be, I wouldn't think of them that way. If anything, they were more opportunities to screw people up.

More thoughts, paranoia, and doubts hounded me, but there wasn't any point in delving into them. I had no way of figuring things out anyway.

I… I would train and learn for now. I didn't want to be unprepared for whatever I ended up doing. Killing Grimm would still be helping. That wasn't a bad goal to work towards. Even though I couldn't see a way to make a real difference… So, I'd just… keep going…

The sunset fell into the horizon, and the world was dark.

Chapter 11 End


Author Notes:

I want to give an enormous thank you to Slapshot, Juff, Breakingamber, ccstat, Majigah, and Sigravig for killing this chapter with their superior knowledge of grammar and writing, and allowing what this chapter became to rise from the ashes of what I had written to become even better than it was.

Oh god, we're only on Chapter 10 of Volume 1.

Volume 2 starts during their next semester at Beacon, so we have some time to cover. Like, months of time.

This one had 2k cut. Honestly, I expected all of them to be like that.


Alternate Convo Ending:

"It's how Ruby and I met. Well, how she met me. I met her in the ballroom," I added.

"Wait. 'How she met you'?... You mean, RUBY WAS THE ONE THAT SHOT YOU?!" Weiss began to yell as she jumped to an extreme conclusion.

Yang stopped blinking only to burst into laughter while Blake chuckled into her hand.

"What no! No no no no. I just found her-" Ruby protested, speeding through her response as she frantically waved her hands in negation.

"Best to stay in line Weiss, you now know how she handles discipline," I remarked flatly, cutting Ruby off, before grabbing things to wash up before bed.

"What! Taylor why?" Ruby begged.

Yang was still laughing as I left, leaving Ruby to stumble through an explanation of how she found me.

It was better like this, a misunderstanding and a joke.

I didn't want them trying to ask how I got them or why. I didn't think they were ready for the answer. That I deserved those bullets. That I needed to be stopped. That in a way, I had wanted them.