Last Chapter: Botan woke up to find the Lure had taken her again, and Yusuke and Kuwabara were rescuing her from its lair. Yusuke took her to Spirit World, where Koenma decreed that Botan must stay in Spirit World from now on, and further stay under the watch of Ayame. Botan disliked the idea, and when she found Ayame was giving her tea from a secret stash of "special" tea she kept hidden, Botan concluded she was having a hallucination, and decided to assault Ayame to escape her.


Chapter 15: In My Dreams

Botan remained in the same position for several seconds, her arms outstretched, her bat held out in the air at the point where it had collided with Ayame's head. She had not expected Ayame to go down so hard from just one blow. She moved her eyes from her bat to Ayame, lying still and silent on the ground, and then over to the kitchen counter, where Ayame had just plated a still-steaming tamagoyaki. Botan banished her oar, stepped one foot over Ayame and grabbed up the warm egg roll. She took a bite and nodded her appreciation, stepping back over Ayame and moving to the window. She continued eating her breakfast with one hand whilst clumsily opening the window with the other. She hopped up into the windowframe and pushed the last of the food into her mouth, sucking the ends of her fingers before summoning her oar and leaping outside.

Botan flew swiftly and directly to the nearest portal, choosing the nearest one rather than the one that would take her where she wished to go, as she knew that she needed to get out of Spirit World as quickly as possible, before she was noticed missing. She arrived in the living world some distance from where she needed to be, and so elected to stay above the cloud-line until she was closer to her destination. She was still a little weak, and the wounds in her arms and legs ached, but her resolution was sound, and the determination gave her the strength required to fly fast and smooth. She spent a little time straightening out her dishevelled clothing as she flew, before tidying up her ponytail (although she acknowledged it was still messy) and finally dropping below the clouds as she moved over the skies of Sarayashiki city.

Continuing with her intention of hiding herself, Botan opted to approach her destination from a different angle to the one she would usually take. Rather than flying down to the front door of the house, she instead approached the side of the house, aiming for a window on the upper floor there. She was not sure what time of day it was or even what day it was, but she was hoping to find Shizuru in her bedroom. In that moment, there were only three people Botan could think of who could honestly tell her where she was – Shizuru, Hiei and the Lure – and Shizuru was the easiest to find, the safest to approach and would be the gentlest in both listening to her and giving her advice.

Botan slowed as she neared the window, but stopped completely when she saw Shizuru inside the room, pacing about, apparently talking to someone, as her mouth was moving. Botan drifted slightly closer, but remained back, as something seemed amiss. Shizuru eventually finished her speech, lowering her head and touching the fingers of one hand to her forehead. She held her position briefly before turning around and walking decisively to one side of the room. Botan drifted in the opposite direction, peering around the edge of the window-frame to see what Shizuru was doing. She had stopped in front of her bed, and another slight adjustment of position showed Botan why.

Hiei was sitting on the edge of Shizuru's bed.

He looked up at her and said something, an amused smirk appearing on his face as he spoke. Shizuru bent over, placing her hands on his shoulders. She said something directly to his face before kissing him on his bandana-clad forehead.

The wind burned tears into Botan's eyes as she raced through the air. Sometimes that was something the wind did. And, apparently, sometimes even the most senior ferry girl hated her, and her best friend betrayed her, and her boyfriend cheated on her with her best friend.

Within minutes Botan had reached Genkai's temple. It looked desolate, being uninhabited and the gardens dulled over by the January weather, but Botan knew it was where she needed to be. She dropped from her oar and marched on, letting it fall to the ground behind her. She continued up the path to the temple entrance, stopping several feet back from the steps as she finally spotted the little girl sitting on the top step, smiling at her in a way that made her look cute and harmless.

"Back again?" the Lure asked.

"Maybe," Botan replied. "It depends."

"On what?" the Lure asked.

"On where I'm coming back from," Botan replied. "Or… Where I'm going back to."

"Oh dear."

"Am I still hallucinating?"

"Do you feel like you are?"

"I-I don't know."

"Do you like what's happening in your life right now?"

"No."

"Did you like it when you were sleeping in my lair?"

"N-not really."

The Lure looked confused.

"The first time it was amazing," Botan explained. "But the second time… It wasn't as good. It… Felt just the same as this… Whatever this is…"

"Hm," the Lure said, nodding pensively. "I didn't increase the amount of venom I gave you. Maybe you built a tolerance. You must be more resilient than I gave you credit for. I didn't really enjoy hosting you, but I thought that was largely down to the interference of your friends."

"Well… Maybe you should…"

The Lure grinned, that too-wide to be human grin, and stood up.

"Maybe I should what, Botan?" it asked.

"Maybe you should…"

Botan placed a hand on her wrist, and slid up her sleeve, taking a moment to look at the wound on her arm. It looked less angry than it had the day before, but it was far from healed.

"Will it hurt…?" she muttered.

"No," the Lure softly replied.

"Not at all?"

"Not at all."

"Not even if…"

"If?"

"If you give me more."

"It won't hurt."

"I mean… Give me more venom."

"I can do that. And you won't feel any pain. Only pleasure. Doesn't that sound nice?"

Botan nodded. The image of her arm blurred, but that was just because there was still a strong wind stinging her eyes.

"Don't cry," the Lure said.

Botan let her sleeve fall, her eyes moving to the thick ropes of webbing snaking around her ankles.

"It'll all be over soon."


"Botan?"

Botan blinked, trying to focus her eyes.

"Hello?" Keiko sang. "Earth to Botan! Someone's awful dreamy today!"

Botan blinked and everything became clear. She looked across at Keiko, who was smiling at her expectantly.

"That wasn't bad news, was it?"

Botan looked down at her communication mirror, sitting open on her palm, the screen dark.

"The call from Koenma?" Keiko pressed. "What was it about?"

Botan opened her mouth, glancing back and forth between her communicator and Keiko.

"Hey, moon-face," Shizuru said, smiling at Botan. "Do you have to go, or can we finish this picnic?"

Botan looked around Shizuru, Keiko and Yukina, all watching her expectantly. She slowly closed her communication mirror and pushed it up her sleeve. A pretty floral picnic blanket was laid out in front of her, decorated with all the wonderful things Keiko had brought for Shizuru's surprise birthday picnic, and an ornate porcelain vase of beautiful flowers stood in the centre, a thoughtful contribution from Yukina.

"It was nothing," Botan said. "Let's finish the picnic."

"Oh good!" Keiko said with a sigh. "I was worried it was another mess Yusuke would get dragged into!"

"Yeah, my brother really doesn't need anything else distracting him from his studies right now," Shizuru agreed.

"Anything else?" Botan asked.

Shizuru and Keiko both nodded in Yukina's direction and Botan mouthed an "oh" of realisation.

"Have some cake, Botan," Keiko said.

Botan looked down to see a wedge of the multi-layered strawberry cream cake Keiko had made sitting on a plate in front of her. She picked it up, lifting the small cake fork from the plate and pressing it into the sponge, watching it bend and break under the pressure.

"The cake is delicious, Keiko," Yukina commented.

Botan closed her mouth over the chunk of cake on the end of her fork and smiled: delicious was an understatement. The sponge was so moist, the cream melted smoothly against her tongue, the taste blending to perfection with the tang of the strawberry she had bitten into within the sponge.

"The cake is divine, Keiko," she said through a mouthful of food.

"Thank you, both of you," Keiko replied.

"This is nice," Shizuru said with a sigh. "Thanks, girls."

The others nodded and continued eating as Keiko shared with them stories about Kuwabara and Kurama and how they were coping with life on campus. Once they were finished, Shizuru helped Keiko pack away her things, Yukina handed the flowers – in the vase – to Shizuru and told her to keep them as a gift, and Botan retrieved her picnic blanket, folding it up and cuddling it to her chest. Keiko drove Shizuru home and then took Yukina to Genkai's temple. Yukina got out the car and Botan followed her.

"It's quick for me to get back to Spirit World from here," Botan said. "Thank you, Keiko!"

Keiko bid them goodbye and set off. Botan and Yukina walked up the temple path together, stopping several feet short of the temple steps.

"Don't you get awfully lonely living up here on your own?" Botan asked Yukina.

"I have plenty to do here," Yukina replied. "I love tending the gardens, growing vegetables and fruits and cooking."

"I suppose," Botan agreed.

"And besides Botan, I'm not alone up here."

Botan frowned but Yukina smiled and purposefully moved her large eyes to one side. Botan turned her head in the direction Yukina indicated, where, after a few seconds of searching, she eventually noticed a pair of legs, in baggy black pants and short black boots, standing on a tree branch high up in a tree, the remainder of the figure hidden in the shadows. Botan nodded and turned back to Yukina with a smile.

"Take care, Yukina," she said. "I'll see you again soon."

Yukina nodded and started off towards the temple. Botan turned to walk down the temple path. She looked back over her shoulder, giving one last wave as Yukina disappeared into the temple. When she turned back, she saw a blur of motion and Hiei dropped out of the tree he had been (unsuccessfully) hiding in.

"She could see you, you know Hiei," Botan greeted him.

"I meant for her to see me," Hiei replied.

"Really?"

Hiei gave her one of his hard looks, and she knew that he was lying, too proud to admit that he had been found out.

"She's fine," she said, deciding not to push him any further on the matter. "She's happy."

"Yes," he said.

"But… It's nice that you still keep an eye on her."

Hiei maintained his hard look.

"I keep an eye on you too," he said.

"You do?" she asked.

"Yes," he replied. "In case you forget and tell her."

Botan nodded.

"I won't say anything," she said. "I promise."

"Yes, you do promise," Hiei replied. "But then you get all giddy, and you forget yourself."

"I don't get giddy!" Botan complained.

"You get giddy."

"No I don't!"

"You do."

"When?"

"All the time."

Botan gasped.

"Name one time!" she challenged.

"Two weeks ago," Hiei replied, without hesitation.

"Two weeks ago? That was… Christmas?"

"Yusuke kissed Keiko underneath a weed, and you got giddy."

"That was different."

"And then Kuwabara asked Yukina if she would step under the weed with him and you said he shouldn't ask her that when her brother was in the room."

Botan's face fell.

"Giddy," Hiei said.

"Tipsy," Botan corrected him. "I had a little drinky-poo… I blame Shizuru."

"Call it what you will," Hiei said. "It still means I have to watch you."

Botan nodded.

"But not all the time," she said.

"Just about," Hiei answered.

"Not when I'm in the shower?"

Botan swallowed carefully, hoping she had not physically shivered when a rush of feeling flooded her chest at the very idea of Hiei watching her when she was in the shower, naked, exposed, unaware.

"I check on your periodically," Hiei cryptically replied.

"But not when I'm in the shower?" Botan asked again.

"I check periodically," Hiei replied. "Sometimes I catch you speaking to Yukina and risking saying something you shouldn't."

"What about the other times?"

Hiei gave her what was as close as he ever came to a questioning look.

"You said sometimes you catch me talking to Yukina," she explained. "What about the other times."

"The other times you are doing things I don't need to make you stop doing."

Botan bit her lip and shifted her weight awkwardly.

"What sort of things?" she asked.

Hiei looked at her for a protracted moment before a glint appeared in his eyes and his mouth curled into that smirk he got when he was about to unleash a hidden move on an opponent who had underestimated his skill and strength.

"Don't worry, Botan," he said in a smooth voice that made her more worried than his usual tone would have. "I don't watch for too long."

Botan gasped and Hiei's grin widened enough to briefly flash his teeth before he leapt back up into the tree in a blur of black. Botan looked up, but he continued jumping from treetop to treetop, soon disappearing in the depths of the forest. Once he had disappeared entirely, Botan summoned her oar and rose up into the sky, taking one last look down at the trees, but failed to see any trace of him, his speed having taken him well out of her range already.

"He didn't say he doesn't watch me when I'm in the shower," she muttered to herself, before turning towards the nearest portal to Spirit World with a smile.

Back in Spirit World, the sky was that deep shade of magenta it turned in early evening, and although there were other things she could have done, Botan decided just to go to her room. On instinct, she flew around the back of the temple, towards the row of windows that belonged to the ferry girls' quarters. As she reached her destination, she noticed a series of things, each one making her feel more at ease. Firstly, there were no crossed swords on the temple wall. Secondly, all the rooms were in darkness, including Ayame's. And lastly, and most importantly, Botan could not access her room, because her window was shut, because she never left it open.

Finally, things made sense.

Botan flew around to the front of the temple again, diving down to the front entrance and hopping off her oar. She enjoyed a reasonably easy walk through the first corridor before reaching the central part of the temple, where, as expected, she was met with utter chaos. Botan smiled to herself as she dodged and weaved her way through the harried bodies racing around, finding it oddly satisfying to see such a typical sight. She smiled and nodded greetings to anyone who happened to look her way, skipping between and around them until she was out the other side. She ran up a flight of steps and turned off to one side, shortly passing through a door that led her back into the ferry girls' quarters. She skipped all the way to her own door, slipping inside and breathing a sigh of relief.

After a quick look around, she took herself into her small en suite, stripping off her clothes and stepping into the shower. She turned on the water and untied her hair before stepping fully under the flow of water. The water was just the perfect temperature and flow, and she closed her eyes, tilting her head back, smoothing her hands down the side of her head to ensure her hair was wet through.

In that position, she wondered if Hiei was watching her.

Botan slowly tilted her chin downwards, opening her eyes and blinking away the water from her eyelashes. Sometimes, just thinking about Hiei, especially imagining if he might be watching her, was enough to draw him to her. It had happened in the past: she had been thinking about how he might react if she said anything to Yukina about their relation and he had invaded her thoughts. Maybe if she thought about him when she was in the shower, he would hear her. Maybe he would see her. Maybe he would even come to her.

Botan licked her lips and drew in a shuddering breath of anticipation as she noticed a dark shadow on the other side of her frosted glass shower door. She was quivering – with excitement, with anticipation, with expectation – as she turned towards the shadow and reached out a hand to open the door. She licked her lips again and exhaled a steadying breath before sliding open the door and finding herself face-to-face with her towel rack.

Botan started laughing at her own ridiculousness, forgetting that the towels were hanging on the other side of the door. She stepped back, yelping as her bare back, warmed by the shower water, collided with the cold tile wall. She then laughed at herself harder, sliding the shower door closed and stepping under the water again. She felt silly, but in the best possible way.

And life felt good.


Botan woke up in the morning with a smile. She cuddled into her pillow and her bedsheets, taking a moment to remember the dream she had enjoyed while she had been asleep. She had dreamt about Hiei, that when she had opened the shower door the night before, the shadow behind the door had been him, and not just her towels hanging on the towel rail. He had smiled at her in that same dark, seductive way he had when he had teased her about watching her, and he had stepped into the shower towards her. She had stepped back to make room for him and his body had collided with hers, pinning her to the tiles as he moved in for a kiss. Underneath the onslaught of the shower, they had kissed, passionately, and he had run his hands down her sides and over the curve of her hips before reaching around the backs of her thighs and lifting her up. She had wrapped her legs around his waist and let him carry her to her bed, where he had thrown her down and leapt onto her, ravishing her body with kisses before making love to her.

It was a nice thought, but dreams were just that: dreams. And it had just been something she had seen, not something she had actually felt. And now that she had witnessed the idea, she wanted to act it out. She wanted to feel it.

Botan threw off her bedsheets and sat up in her bed, and from nowhere, the idea occurred to her that she could just lie down, close her eyes, picture her dream scene again, and touch herself.

Botan slowly swung her legs over the edge of her bed. That thought had never occurred to her before. Where had that come from?

Had Hiei put that idea there? Had he sensed her thinking about him – as he was prone to do – and implanted that idea? And if so, why?

So that he could watch her?

Botan squeezed her thighs together and bit her lip and tried to focus. A small part of her was already theorising that if she were to just lie down and start touching herself, she might soon get the answer to whether or not Hiei had put the idea in her head, because he might talk to her: telepathically or in person.

Botan looked at her bedroom window. She laughed, getting to her feet and throwing it open. It was literally impossible for Hiei to come to her via that route. Her window was so high off the ground and on such an expanse of flat wall, it was literally only accessible by flight. The only way Hiei could reach her bedroom window would be if Yusuke took him there on Puu, or if Kurama brought him there using his Floating Leaf. And that would be silly. They would drop him off, he would come into her room as she was touching herself, and what then? What would Yusuke or Kurama do?

Maybe they would watch.

Botan stepped back into her room and slammed her window shut. She cleared her throat and cleared her mind and set about getting ready for the day ahead. She was up quite early (mostly because she had gone to bed early to think about Hiei) and so she had time to go to the dining hall and have breakfast. It sounded like a nice idea, and so she followed through with it, filling a tray with food and moving over to join a table with five other ferry girls already at it. They made pleasantries for a bit before one of the girls asked a question that made Botan pause for thought.

"Should we ask Ayame if she wants to join us?"

Botan leaned to one side, peering past the girl directly across from her. In the very corner of the hall, at a small table with only the one chair, Ayame was sitting alone, one hand holding a spoon over a bowl of soup, the other holding a book she was apparently so engrossed in, she had forgotten to continue eating her breakfast.

"She's always busy with something," one of the girls commented.

Botan took the last mouthful of food from her tray and stood up, wiping the corners of her mouth on a napkin and then moving across the hall. She was not really sure that the other girls had been suggesting she should be the one to approach Ayame, but she felt that she ought to and so she did.

"Ayame?"

Ayame made a noise of acknowledgement but did not look up at Botan until she had finished reading the passage she was on, at which point she turned to Botan and dipped her spoon into her soup.

"Hello, Botan," she said.

"The girls and I were wondering if you wanted to join us for breakfast?" Botan asked, indicating the table she had come from with one hand.

Ayame sipped the soup from her spoon before smiling tightly.

"No thank you," she said. "I really have to finish this book."

Botan leaned to one side to see the cover of the book Ayame was so engrossed in. It was one of the ancient books from the restricted part of the Spirit World library, one of those with the etched leather jacket that smelled mouldy. An old, outdated book, that probably contained inaccurate information.

"Well, if you change your mind…?" Botan offered.

"No," Ayame said. "But thank you for the offer."

Ayame turned her attention fully back to her book and Botan turned her back on her. She wished Ayame would relax a little, learn to let go, to have some fun, to experience genuine excitement, to know the thrill of being a part of something bigger than the duties of a ferry girl. But, she supposed, Ayame was what she was, and what she was was a very plain-thinking, controlled person, who never felt – or indeed even wanted to feel – the highs and the lows of a more dynamic existence.

Botan cleared her dishes from the table and left the other ferry girls, heading out to collect her task list for the day. It looked reasonable, which was a pleasant surprise, as she had taken the previous day off for Shizuru's birthday, and she had expected to return to an increased workload. But she set out and was halfway through her list before long, only realising as she reached the next item on the list exactly where she was going.

She had been to that place so many times, collecting the souls of those who had unfortunately passed after accidentally crossing into Demon World, but it was rare that she ever saw Hiei there, and so when he was there that day, although she was surprised to see him, she was a little anxious at the prospect of facing him, especially after their last encounter: and the fact that she had been thinking about him so much the night before and that morning.

"You're late," Hiei commented as she slid from her oar to his side.

"No I'm not!" she protested.

Hiei turned his head to one side and Botan followed his gaze, finding the girl's soul was running around on the hillside in a panic.

"Oh," she said. "Perhaps I am a little behind schedule…"

"Maybe if hadn't spent so long in the shower this morning," Hiei muttered.

"I didn't have a shower this morning!" Botan immediately replied, hoping that, by correcting his false accusation, the redness would fade from her cheeks.

"Not literally."

Botan opened her mouth to ask what he meant, but before she could lend voice to her thoughts, her mind flooded with exactly what she had done that morning after she had woken up: she had laid in her bed recalling a dream she had enjoyed the night before about Hiei arriving in her shower and carrying her off to ravish her.

"You don't know that for sure," she said quietly, looking down at her feet as she poked the toe of her sandal at a stray pebble.

"I do," he replied. "You're still thinking about it now."

"Only because you brought it up!" Botan wailed.

Hiei moved his eyes to her, regarding her with a sidelong look she found accusatory.

"It was a dream, Hiei!" she protested. "I just dreamt that you whisked me out of the shower and carried me to my bed and had your way with me! I can't control what I dream about! And I was only thinking about it this morning because I had just dreamt it, and it was the first thing on my mind when I woke up! And then I only thought about it just now because you brought it up!"

Hiei blinked and a hint of a smile appeared on his face.

"Don't tell Yusuke or Kurama that I liked the idea of them watching me touching myself for you," she said quietly.

Hiei turned fully towards her, a dark grin spreading over his face, his eyes brightening.

"It's really unfair of you to watch me like that, Hiei," she said with a sulky pout. "Without my permission. Sneaking into my private thoughts… It's rude."

"I wasn't watching you," Hiei replied. "I haven't looked into your thoughts at all in the last couple of days: but as you can see, I don't need to. You tell me it all regardless."

Botan's jaw dropped with a horrified gasp.

"Hiei!" she squealed.

"You've always had a big mouth," he replied. "Maybe you should think about better ways of using it."

"Like what?"

Hiei slowly raised his chin, and the change in angle of his face reminded Botan of a thought she had enjoyed once before, of her stripping off her clothes while he watched her, and then kneeling down in front of him. She licked her lips and he let out a small chuckle.

"You know exactly what," he said.

"Don't look at me like that, Hiei!" she moaned. "You put that idea in my head!"

"I didn't need to," he replied with a smirk.

He ran his eyes over her before making a grunt of amused self-satisfaction and turning towards the glimmering tear between the human and demon worlds.

"You can't go!" Botan cried, reaching out a hand towards him. "Not now! Not like this!"

He looked back over his shoulder at her, none of the smug confidence gone from his eyes.

"You can't just…" Botan began. "Leave me like this!"

"Like what?" he asked.

"Like this!"

Botan waved her hands up and down the length of her body.

"Your lack of willpower is your own problem, not mine," he plainly replied, turning his head from her.

"You can't tease me like that and just walk away!" she snapped.

Hiei turned around to face her.

"You're a little indisposed at the moment," he said.

"No I'm not!" Botan argued.

Hiei pointedly looked in the direction of the teenage girl's soul that was still running rampant around the hillside.

"Well, I only have…"

Botan retrieved her list and scanned it over.

"Another…" she said slowly. "Twenty or thirty souls to collect."

"In that case, some other time," Hiei said, taking a step back, moving himself closer to the portal back to his home world.

"You knew I was busy!" she wailed. "You did that deliberately!"

"I haven't done anything. You're the one working yourself into a frenzy over your own lack of self-control."

"I do not lack self-control!"

Hiei took another step backwards, the portal shimmering around him as his back touched against it.

"You can't leave me here like this!" Botan yelled.

"Maybe you're the one torturing me," Hiei replied in a low voice. "Did you ever consider that?"

Botan started to ask him what he had meant, but her voice trailed off and her eyes wandered downwards, and she was once more left with the thought that it was unfortunate Hiei wore such slack pants, because they made it impossible to verify what she was sure he meant.

"You're a dirty girl."

Botan gasped and lifted her eyes back to Hiei's face, but she only caught a glimpse of his smirk before he disappeared through the portal, returning to Demon World.

"Well you are a dirty boy, Hiei!" she yelled, despite knowing he would no longer be able to hear her.

She bent down and retrieved the pebble she had been kicking and threw it at the portal. It merely passed through the air and landed a short distance beyond the point where Hiei had disappeared. Not satisfied with this, Botan grabbed up handfuls of grass and threw them pointlessly at the portal, yelping in frustration as blades of grass rained down around her. She eventually dropped to the ground, sitting there pouting at the disappearing portal ahead of her.

"So mean…" she grumbled.

"What is happening?" a voice to her right cried out. "Why is my body over there?"

Botan turned her head to see the soul she was due to collect still tearing around the hillside. She sighed and got to her feet, brushing the grass from her clothing and picking pieces from her ponytail. She felt infuriated, frustrated (in more ways than one), impatient and tortured. It was awful and it was wonderful. She hated it and she loved it.

She had never felt more alive.


Next Chapter: Botan is living in a fantasy (pardon the pun), living a fairy tale where she is the heroine (poorly chosen pun). Life is exciting and fantastic, Hiei is flirtatious and sexy and life is one big party. Spirit World is fun, Botan earns another day off to go to a dinner party and she convinces her friends to give her a sexy makeover for seeing Hiei there. Chapter 16: Alive