Chapter 28

Toni sighed as she looked around the renamed Avengers Tower. It was just as she left it all those months ago before she decided she needed to leave the city behind and move back to Malibu.

It seemed her home there had become somewhat of a sanctuary for her; every time things in the town she was raised in got too hard, she fled.

But now her home had burned down, and the tower was all she had left.

She knew it was being rebuilt, but it didn't change the fact she still felt lost herself in the aftermath of it all.

Perhaps a part of her had been lost the moment she'd flown the nuke into the wormhole.

She was getting better, slowly, of that much she was sure. But it didn't change the fact that she still had a long way to go either.

She looked around her workshop, her bots beeping around in the corner, freshly reconstructed. She might have given them new parts, but their programming was still the same. Just because she knew now how to make more complex artificial intelligence didn't mean she should. Her babies all had their own personalities, and even if she could do better, it wasn't right to change who they were.

"Toni?" she heard a voice say and she quickly spun around, dropping the wrench she'd been holding, as she came face to face with Steve Rogers.

He raised his hands quickly, "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"What are you doing here, Cap?" she asked as picked up her tools. "Shouldn't you be back on your American Freedom tour?"

"Is that what we're calling it?" he raised a brow at her.

"That's what the internet is calling it," she shrugged. He looked a bit confused by that and she clarified, "Twitter's taken to it. Whenever anyone sees you and posts a picture, they use that hashtag. It has quite a following. I've had JARVIS retweet a few for me."

"I don't know if I'll ever understand this century," he sighed. "Why is that even entertaining?"

"The internet has to find it's amusement somewhere," she answered. "And you've gathered quite a loyal fanbase. But I doubt you're here to talk about your Twitter following. So what can I do for Captain?"

"I came to check in on you," he told her, and she gave him a confused look. He sighed, "Toni, why didn't you call?"

"What do you mean?" she asked him, confused.

"You called out a terrorist on national television," he reminded her, "You went after the Mandarin on your own. Your house was bombed, Toni! The world thought you were dead. We all thought you were dead. And not once did you call any of us asking for help. Not even your own cousins. Why didn't you call? We would have been there for you. We could have helped you."

"You did," she reminded him, "You showed up when I went after Killian. And I did call Harry; I asked SHIELD to help."

"Not until the very end," he said, unimpressed. "You could have called sooner. You could have reached out. we're supposed to be a team, Toni. How can we be a team if you go off doing your own thing, and letting the rest of us to wonder if you're alive or not?"

She blinked at him, "Were you worried about me?"

He barked out a laugh, "The entire world was worried about you. All the news could talk about was if you were alive or not. There was speculation about what would happen to your legacy. No one knew a damn thing about what happened to you. And you still don't see why that's a problem?"

"I couldn't risk anyone knowing where I was," she told him softly, "He'd already endangered Happy and nearly killed Pepper. The last thing I wanted was anyone else I cared about in danger. If I came back to New York that would have put Ava and Bruce in danger. And that was not a risk I was willing to take."

"You could have at least let us know you were okay," he pressed. "I know you think you're alone, but you don't know how wrong that is. You don't know how many people care about you. Even if we're not around all the time to let you know just how much you mean to us. Because you do, Toni. You mean the world to all of us, and I don't think a single person would be fine if you were suddenly gone from their lives."

She didn't know what to say to that. For so long she'd felt so alone, with her only friends being Jarvis, Ana, and the Carter-Sousa family. And she'd accepted that. The kids at school tried to befriend her for her wealth or status, and she never did fit in anywhere, being younger than the other kids. In university, she'd met Rhodey. And then came Pepper and Happy, and suddenly she was surrounded by people she cared about. But she'd lost so many people over the years, and she had once again felt like everyone was leaving her.

"You're not alone," he repeated and moved closer to her. His eyes searched hers for a moment and when she didn't back away, he pulled her into a hug gingerly. She relaxed slightly, as his arms enveloped her, and she felt the warmth of his body against her own.

He pulled away a few seconds later, looking a little sheepish but she smiled softly at him.

"I'll call," she told him after a moment. "Next time I decide to take on a terrorist. It's just that you were all busy, and he made it personal when he went after Happy. I've been doing this on my own for so long, that I don't always know how to let other people in. But you're right. We are a team. And being on a team means letting other people in and letting them help when things get rough. I can't promise it'll be easy. I'm told I can be quite stubborn, but I'll try, at the very least."

"Good," he nodded as he looked her over. "Now, when was the last time you ate anything?"

She paused for a moment, trying to think back, but her lack of answer had him shaking his head.

"Come on," he nudged her slightly, "I'll make you lunch."

"But I still have a few projects I need to finish," she said, waving her arms around to show all the work she hadn't finished yet.

"And they'll be there for you when you get back," he said simply. "Come on, Stark. Take a break."

She sighed as she looked into his expectant eyes, before reluctantly nodding, "Lead the way O Captain My Captain."

He shot her an amused look as she followed him out of the room.


Steve didn't leave after she ate. He didn't leave later that day or even that week. And in all honestly, it surprised her.

It wasn't like she was alone in the tower, rattling around without any purpose. But at the same time she wasn't used to having so many people around again. Ava and Bruce were still around, and Harry had insisted on taking some time off to stay with her.

Maybe she ought to be offended by the fact that her family and friends didn't trust her not to do anything stupid again, but really, were they wrong? She did call out a terrorist on national television.

So really, they were right she supposed to be a bit concerned.

And it was nice really, to have the people she cared about in her life once more.

She sighed to herself as she stared at her screen. She'd been looking at it for quite some time, trying to find the motivation to finish her latest project, but really, she didn't want to. She was tired, whether she liked to admit it or not, and it had been over thirty hours since she'd slept last.

She was trying to get better, but it didn't make the nightmares go away. It didn't change the fact that she still saw the wormhole every time she closed her eyes.

But she'd gotten better at handling it. At trying breathing techniques or joining Bruce on the couch on nights when neither of them quite were able to get any sleep.

It was going to be a process; she wouldn't get better overnight. Hell, she might never get better. She still hated being handed things from her childhood trauma. But she would learn to deal with it, just like she learnt to deal with everything else that had haunted her through her life.

"Miss," JARVIS interrupted her thoughts, "You have a call from Ben Parker."

She frowned at the name; she hadn't talked to the Parkers since their decision for her to stop mentoring their nephew, and she was unsure why they would be calling.

She didn't blame them, not when she had been a disaster. And if Peter had gotten hurt because of the Mandarin, she never would have forgiven herself.

She sighed, "Put him through," she said, as she heard his voice fill her speakers.

"Toni?" Ben asked, "Do you have a few moments to talk? I hope I'm not calling at a bad time."

"No, now is fine," she said, unsure. "So, what's up?"

"I wanted to check in on you," he admitted, "We were worried when we saw the news coverage. Peter didn't sleep at all that night when he thought you had been killed."

She shrugged, a bit uncomfortable, "Yeah, well I'm fine, as you can see. Nothing more than a few scrapes really. No need to worry about me."

"Toni," Ben let out a breath, "You know why we did what we did right?"

"Of course," she sighed, "I'm a mess. That's never been a secret; the media likes to talk about it all the time. I can't blame you for thinking that your nephew needs better role models than me."

"You know that wasn't what we meant," Ben said firmly, "You needed help Toni. What you were doing wasn't healthy and we didn't want Peter to see you like that. But you are not a bad role model. You were suffering from an illness. The same illness that so many other people suffer from on a regular basis. It is not your fault."

"Why are you calling, Ben?" she asked him tiredly. "If you want to know if I'm suddenly all better, I'm not. I'm not as destructive as before but I'm not better. So I doubt you'd want me around Peter any time soon."

"But you're trying," he told her, "I've talked to Ava and she told me that you've gotten better at talking about it, instead of letting it eat you away."

He paused for a moment, and she didn't say anything.

"Peter misses you, Toni. You were able to offer him something that May and I can't; a connection and a chance to learn. He doesn't get a lot of that at school, and he's come out of his shell more since he started learning from you. I know you're a busy person, so if you don't have time to mentor Peter any more, we won't hold it against you. But if you're willing, we'd like to continue."

Her throat tightened at that.

"I would," she said softly, "He's a good child, and being around him makes me want to be better."

"Good," Ben said, and she smiled lightly. "He has a science fair coming up. He built a version of your reactor to light up a model city. It's nowhere near as powerful as your own obviously, but he's very proud of it. I know he'd love to show it off to you if you can make it to the fair."

"I can be there," she said quickly, "Just tell me when. I would love to see his version of the reactor."

"It's tomorrow," Ben said, and she had JARVIS make a quick note in her calendar.

"Perfect," she nodded.

"Come over for dinner after," Ben told her, "We all miss having you around."

"Okay," she nodded, "I'll be there."

"I'll let you go now," Ben said, "Thank you, Toni."

"Thank you," she told him, "For trusting me to mentor him."

"You're a good person, Stark," Ben said gently, "Even if you don't always agree."

She didn't say anything as he ended the call. Steve peered in then, wondering if she wanted to get a slice of pizza and she nodded as she grabbed her phone.

Perhaps it would be good for her to leave the lab more often.


"Remind me why we're in Brooklyn?" Toni asked, as the rose-coloured sunglasses covered her eyes. It wasn't the best disguise, and Steve hadn't tried all that much harder to hide his appearance, shy of wearing a Dodgers baseball hat.

"To get pizza," Steve said, as he led her into a place called Totonno's, "And this is the best in the city."

He placed the order the moment they sat down, and she looked up at him a bit surprised.

"I thought you didn't know anything about the new century," she commented.

"This place has been around since my time," he explained to her softly, "Bucky and I would come in and get a slice each after saving our money to be able to afford it. Totonno's is one of the few things from the forties that's still around even after all this time."

She gave him a gentle smile, "What was it like back then?" she asked him curiously.

"Not the greatest," he admitted. "But it was all I knew. I was so sick before the serum that I couldn't even get a proper job to help Ma around the house, and I know Bucky tried to help out when he could, but he had three younger sisters to look after as well. The Depression was rough, because some days we went without food altogether, but it was simpler times, you know? We weren't as connected to the rest of the world as we are now, and we were happy at least."

"I wish I could have met him," Toni said. "Bucky, I mean. Aunt Peg used to tell me stories about the two of you. And not those fake stories that the corporations tried to sell with their comics and movies, but the real stuff."

"There are movies?" he asked, a bit perplexed.

She laughed, "There's an entire collection of things Captain America based. Maybe I'll ask JARVIS to play one of the movies tonight. They're not very good, but they have a decent cult following to it. Since you were thought to be dead, they got away with it; but I'm sure now that you're back you can you can gain ownership over your image. Then you can collect the profits from it."

"I don't need the money," he said simply, "Besides, it's not like I did any of the work involved in the process."

"So collect a portion of it then," she shrugged, "You don't need to keep it if you don't want. All Iron Woman sale proceeds feeds directly into the Maria Stark foundation to help victims of the battles and various other charitable causes."

"You do that?" he asked a bit surprised.

"I have more money than I know what to do with," she said simply. "The least I can do is make sure some of it goes towards good causes. The Battle of New York caused a lot of damage and people lost their homes. If I can help alleviate that in any way, then why wouldn't I?"

He gave her a gentle smile as their pizza came then, and she from just the smell of it, she understood why Steve had been insistent on coming here for lunch.

"It smells amazing," she told him, as she reached for a slice of pizza.

"Wait til you taste it," he said, with his Brooklyn accent filling his voice. She grinned up at him as she bit carefully into it.

She let out a soft moan and his eyes twinkled.

"Told you it was good," he laughed, and she took another bite.

"We're getting pizza from here more often," she told him as he nodded in agreement.

"I'm glad there are still a few things that a little guy from Brooklyn can teach the great Toni Stark," he teased her.

"Oh I'm sure there's quite a few things you could teach me," she purred as he blushed lightly.

She could see him bite back a retort as a young boy came to their table just then.

"Miss Iron Woman?" he asked he politely and she smiled at him.

"Hello," she said, as she looked over at the boy, "What's your name?"

"James," he said a bit shyly.

"That's a great name," she said as he lit up a little bit at that, "That's the name of my best friend, War Machine."

"He's so cool," the boy beamed.

"And the name of Captain America's best friend too," Toni said as Steve watched them interact.

"I made you a picture," the boy said, as he put it on their table, "I drew all the Avengers."

"Is this for me?" she asked him, as she looked down at the drawings on the page. He nodded quickly and she grinned. "I love it, James. Thank you so much."

He looked back over at where his parents were sitting, "I have to go now."

He ran back over to where his family was, and she placed the picture gingerly in her bag.

"You're good with kids," Steve said as the boy left their table.

She smiled, "I meet a lot of kids, especially since becoming Iron Woman. A lot of them want to show me their artwork or just take a picture with me."

"Does this kind of thing happen to you often?" Steve asked after a moment, a bit amused.

"Usually if I go out into public," she nodded, "Sometimes it's cute little kids with pictures. Other times it entitled adults who don't understand that sometimes I just want to be somewhere without the commotion."

"Must be hard," he remarked, "To never get any privacy. Even on the road it was nice to meet people and hear their stories, but if I had to deal with it constantly, then I don't know what I would have done."

She shrugged, uncomfortable, "It's just part of my life I guess," she said, "Even before I became Iron Woman it was for being a Stark. It's just how the world works."

"Doesn't make it right," he said with a shake of his head.

"I know," she sighed, "But what can you do"

He didn't say anything to that, and she used the opportunity to change the subject.

"So tell me more about your trip around America," she said with a grin. "You must have quite a few stories to tell."

He laughed at that, as he launched into a story.


She wore a better disguise as she slipped into the middle school. She had darker sunglasses on, as well a hat she'd borrowed from Steve. Anyone who looked at her closely enough would probably be able to tell who she was, but then again no one ever would suspect Toni Stark of being in a public school to see a science fair.

Today was about Peter and his project. The last thing she wanted was for today to become a media circus and to become about her.

That was not the point of all of this.

She walked through the halls towards the gymnasium and was immediately taken back by how many people were there.

She had partaken in her own share of science fairs over the years, but to see one as an adult was incredible. In the room there were so many young, brilliant minds. These kids were the future. They were the ones she was trying to shape the world into a better place for.

She walked down the aisle where Ben had said Peter was set up, and she held herself back for a few moments, as she watched him eagerly talk about his presentation to the judges. She couldn't hear what the young boy was saying, but she could see the amount of excitement in his face as he happily talked about what it was that he'd created.

She hadn't realized how much she missed mentoring the boy until she saw him up close again. She knew she had no right to feel protective towards him, not when he had his own family, but then again, her family was long since comprised of people who were unrelated to her in any way.

As the judges left his booth, she moved closer to see him. He didn't spot her, going through his notes and she took the moment to say something.

"So how does this work?" she asked casually. Peter's head shot up quickly as he saw her.

"Toni?" he asked in surprise, "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you, Kid," she said nonchalantly. "Isn't it obvious? I heard you had a rather impressive science project and I wanted to come see it."

"You came all the way here for me?" he asked, dazed.

"Yup," she popped the 'p'. "So why don't you tell me about your contraption?"

He beamed, "I tried to make something like the arc reactor," he said, "But of course I couldn't use palladium. And your element isn't easy to recreate without nuclear fusion and I could hardly build one in our apartment. So I changed it to nickel, given it being more easily accessible and part of the same group of elements on the periodic table. Of course it wouldn't work to power anything as powerful as the one in your suit or any of the buildings, but it's strong enough to act like a battery and power the little city in front of me."

She looked down at the model city with lights, moving cars and other elements and smiled at him brightly.

"This is absolutely brilliant, Peter," she said with a grin, "What you've created here is extremely advanced, and I wouldn't be surprised if you won first place."

He grinned, "Thanks! It means a lot to hear you say that."

He paused for a moment, looking shy again and she didn't say anything, wanting him to be comfortable enough to speak.

"I was worried," he admitted to her quietly. "When I heard that you were dead. I had no idea what happened to you, and then the next thing the news was saying was that you'd saved the President and brought down The Mandarin."

"I'm sorry you were worried," she said gently, "But if they knew I was alive they would have kept hurting people I cared about. And I couldn't let that happen."

"Are you okay now?" he asked her in a young voice.

"Not fully," she told him honestly, "But I'm getting better. I will be better. I promise you that much Peter. And if you want to come back to the lab and continue our mentorship, I will gladly pick it back up again. But I'm going to leave the choice to you. If it's something you're uninterested in, or don't think is best for you, then I'll understand."

"You still want to mentor me?" he asked surprised.

She nodded, "I got permission from your aunt and uncle to continue. But only if it's what you want."

"I do!" he said quickly as he hugged her. She tensed up at first, before relaxing and wrapping her arms around the boy. "Thank you, Toni."

"Thank you," she told him with a grin.

The judges got on stage then, and she took a step back as Peter eagerly listened to them announce the results. And she was unsurprised to see that he'd won first place in the fair.

She crossed her arms as she leaned back on the walls of the gymnasium. She'd meant what she'd said to Peter. She was trying to be better. For him, for her family, and for herself.