Chapter 45

Peter Parker was not doing well since he'd received the news of his Aunt's illness. She could hear it in her young protegee's voice every time she talked to him on the phone, trying to convince him to come to the lab for a few hours.

But each time his response stayed the same. He couldn't leave his Aunt May alone.

She knew his fear over his aunt's death wasn't unwarranted. Since losing Jarvis, she'd grown terrified of losing those she cared about. It was why she build weapons for as long as she did. She didn't want something to happen to Rhodey when he was overseas when she knew she had the power to help him out. And she hated making the weapons. But she also knew she would have hated herself more if something had happened to Rhodey and she hadn't done anything to help him.

She'd always known it was unreasonable, but there really wasn't anything she could do to stop it. One didn't simply stop fearing death as a possibility because they knew better. Even minds like hers that were rational and knew better than to constantly expect death knew there wasn't all that much she could really do to stop it from claiming the lives of her loved ones.

So she didn't fault Peter for it. How could she when she'd feared the same thing through most of her life?

However, when Ben called her up and asked if she would mind if Peter came over for a few hours, she didn't disagree. According to Peter's uncle, the boy was getting more and more isolated, as he closed himself off from almost all but one friend. A certain Ned Leeds, whom Peter had been close with for most of his life. His grades were falling, and the boy wasn't getting any sleep.

Despite it having been several months since May's official diagnosis, she knew that none of it had been easy on the boy, and it was why she didn't hesitate when to agree when Ben asked if he could come over for a few hours. She knew the man hoped that the two of them would be able to bond due to their connection, but she wondered if she'd have any more luck in convincing the boy to open up when he hadn't talked with anyone yet about what he was feeling exactly.

Still, she knew she had to try, for his sake. The boy had already been through so much with losing his family, she really didn't want him to have to experience any more pain.

"We'll be back in a few hours, okay Peter?" May said as Peter hugged her tightly.

"Okay," the boy whispered before pulling away. "Are you sure I can't come on your errands with you?"

"No," May said firmly, "It's been a while since you and Toni have gotten together to build anything, and I know how eager you must be to get back into it. Have fun, Sweetheart. I promise, nothing bad is going to happen to me if you have fun for a bit."

Peter bit his lip like he was holding something in, and Toni placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Go have fun you two," Toni said to them with a smile. "We'll try not to dominate the world while you're gone."

"You mean Steve will make sure the two of you don't dominate the world," Ben said with a laugh as Toni grinned.

"Hey we all need someone to keep us in line from time to time," she said with a shrug, "I'm not going to disagree with that."

"See you in a bit," Ben said with a laugh, as he and May headed back into the elevator.

"So what do you feel like building today?" she asked Peter as she turned to face him. "Personally, I want to upgrade the tower a bit. I'm tired of having to get up every time I feel like making popcorn while watching a movie, so I was thinking about making a snack compartment in the living room coffee table. Fully automated of course, so that all it takes is a simple request for the popcorn to start popping. We can add other stuff too, like a nacho cheese creator, and so on. Think about how much better movie nights would be if we had that."

"Sounds okay I guess," Peter said with a shrug.

"What, you think we could do something better?" she asked teasingly.

"I just don't really feel like building anything right now," he said, looking down at his feet. "I'm sorry Ms Stark, I know that you take a lot of time out of your schedule to spend it with me, and I should be grateful for it. And I am! I love working with you. I just don't know how I can pretend everything is fine and go about my day to day life like there isn't this big thing in my life that's happening. And Uncle Ben and Aunt May try to be so positive about it all, but it doesn't change the fact that she's dying."

"No it doesn't," she said softly. She led him over to the couches in the common room, knowing that a distraction wasn't what Peter needed right then. No, he needed someone to talk to.

She wondered, not for the first time, if Peter had anyone to talk to since all of this had happened. Had he talked to his aunt and uncle about how he'd been feeling? Or did they have no idea?

"Talk to me, Peter," she said gently, as Peter clutched a pillow close to his stomach for comfort.

"I'm scared," Peter said softly. "I'm so scared that I'm going to wake up one day and find her passed out again but this time she won't wake up. I-I found her, Toni. I'm the one who found her on the ground when it happened. And I don't think I can ever go through something like that again. I was so scared that she was dead."

"I'm so sorry Darling," she said softly, taking his hand carefully. "You've gone through so much already, and it isn't fair that this is happening to you. If there was anything I could do to help, I would, but there isn't anything. There's nothing either of us could do other than be there for your aunt."

"I don't want her to die," he whispered. "I don't really remember my mom and dad that much. I remember them leaving but not too much more beyond that. But Aunt May and Uncle Ben raised me. I know people don't expect you to care as much about aunts and uncles, not as personally. But they're basically my parents. I can't lose them, Toni."

"We don't always get to control how life turns out," she told him. "When I lost my mother, I was devastated. I didn't leave the house until Rhodey came over and took me to his mom's. I can't tell you everything's going to be okay with your aunt. Not when I don't know. Because we don't get to know how life will turn out. We don't get any control over things like that. And it sucks, I know it sucks, but that's just how life works."

"I want to become a chemical biologist," Peter said after a moment. "Or a neuroscientist. Maybe if I study how the biological makeup of humans, I could prevent things like this from happening to others in the future. Maybe I could even help May."

"I think that's a very noble thing to do," Toni told him with a smile. Of course, she'd hoped he'd want to work at Stark Industries one day, but she could open a research department. She'd turned a weapons company into a tech giant, thriving in different fields. What was another one."

"You're not mad?" he asked her, sounding a bit unsure. "That I don't want to build robots and tech?"

"Of course not, Sweetheart!" she told him firmly, "It's your life to do with as you please. I had a feeling from the moment I met you that you would go on to do great things, and I know that it will happen. Even if you don't choose to follow my footsteps doesn't mean I'd be disappointed. Ava and Bruce are some of the top biologists in their fields. I'm sure that if you worked by their side you could learn so many amazing things. And besides, that's not to say that you won't still work with me in the future. Who what how tech and biology combined could achieve? If that's what you want to do, and it's what makes you happy, then I'll be with you every step of the way, supporting you and cheering you on."

"Okay," Peter said with a small smile. "Thank you. For listening to me. Ned doesn't really get it, he hasn't lost anyone before. And Aunt May and Uncle Ben are trying to be positive around me and keep telling me everything's going to be okay. And I feel horrible because I can't help but always wonder what if? What if it's not okay? What if something happens? What if I lose Aunt May? What if they can't fight through this."

"You're allowed to wonder about it," she said, "Our lives are always filled with curiosity and wonder, and we tend to think about the worst-case scenario at any given time. It's what makes you human. But what's more important is that you know that you're not alone. I want you to know that Peter. That no matter what happens, I'm always here for you. Steve's always here for you. So are Ava, and Harry, Bruce, and all of the other Avengers. We will always all be here for you. You're family Peter."

"And family means no one gets left behind," he said, giving her a soft grin.

"Ohana," she confirmed.

"Ohana," he repeated.

He was silent for a few moments, but then turned to Toni. "I actually want to try making that snack table thing if you still have time. Think about how much better movie night could be if we just had an endless amount of nacho cheese. We wouldn't have to ever get up for anything!"

"That's the spirit," she laughed, as the two of them headed down to her workshop to build it.

It was later when May and Ben came to pick Peter up that she was able to talk to them. Peter and Ava were off eating an unhealthy amount of nachos while Steve sighed at them, and she decided to take the time to speak to the Parkers.

"How is he?" May asked, looking over at her nephew.

"Doing well, all things considered," Toni said honestly, "He opened up and talked about how he was feeling, which I think was the first time he's been able to talk about any of this. He's going to be okay, he just needs to be able to process everything that's happening. But also, I think it would help him if you talked to him honestly about what's happening. He knows you're trying to keep things optimistic, but he knows there's more going on. He's growing up and you can't protect him forever. Tell him the truth. The good, the bad, all of it. He needs to know."

"We were trying to spare his feelings," Ben sighed. "But you're right. We'll have a talk with him tonight."

"We also wanted to talk to you about a few things," May said after a moment.

"What kind of things?" she asked, feeling a bit apprehensive.

"All of this, it's taught us that life is short," Ben started, "I lost my brother and sister-in-law a few years ago. And we took in Peter without a second thought. Because he's family. But everything that's happened recently has taught us that we need to think about the bigger picture, no matter how hard it is. And May being sick, means we need to consider the possibility that both of us may not be there for Peter in the future."

She swallowed, feeling a pit in her stomach as she didn't want Peter to have to grow up without his family.

"We wanted to ask you if you'd consider being his guardian in case something happened to us. We know it's a lot to ask, especially given who you are and how much you do. But Peter trusts you. We trust you. And there's no one else we would trust to take care of Peter if something happened to us."

She swallowed before nodding.

"Of course," she agreed, "I can't promise that I'd be any good at it. And I hope that it never comes to pass. But if anything, Curie forbid, does happen, I promise you I'll be here for Peter."

"Thank you," May told her with a smile, as Peter came over to them. "Ready to go, Pete?"

"Ready," he nodded.

She hugged Peter goodbye as she watched the family leave, thinking about what had just happened. She prayed nothing would ever happen to the family, because Peter loved and needed them. But she knew that if it did, she'd be here for him. They all would be.


She hadn't expected Sharon Carter to show up on her doorstep. Which technically shouldn't have been that surprising. Given that she'd taken over SHIELD and several of the floors in her tower were now dedicated towards the spy operation.

And yet, when she got the announcement that Sharon Carter was requesting access to the floor she'd set up Aunt Peggy and Uncle Daniel on, she found herself surprised.

She'd gotten Carter to come first to her floor, wanting to know what it was that the younger agent wanted before allowing her to see her aunt. Because while Aunt Peggy was doing better, it was going to be a while before she was fully recovered. Her nurses wanted to keep her under supervision for a while longer, and she was more than happy to oblige.

Given SHIELD was now based out of New York, that meant both the Carter-Sousa siblings now lived in her tower, so Uncle Daniel and Aunt Peggy were more than happy to stay with her.

And she was doing well. Toni had spent more time with her aunt than she had in years and it was nice. It was nice being able to talk to her and not have her think she was her mother halfway through. It was nice for her to remember conversations they'd had they day before. And Aunt Peggy was truly elated seeing how far Toni had come in the last two decades.

As nice as it was for her, she knew it meant the world to Ava and Harry. Both of them had been so young when their mom was attacked by HYDRA. Ava hadn't gotten to fully know her mother and have an adult relationship with her. And so much had changed for Harry since then.

Which was why she was so wary of what Sharon Carter wanted, given last time she'd seen the Carter cousin, she'd been attempting to seduce her boyfriend and spy on him on the behalf of SHIELD.

"Carter," Toni said as the elevator doors opened.

"Stark," she said, curtly, "I take it that you're going to deny my request to see Aunt Peggy?"

She took a deep breath, "That depends. Why do you want to see her?"

"I don't need to explain myself to you," she snapped, before taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry that was uncalled for."

She raised a brow at the younger woman.

"Are you here on the behalf of SHIELD again? Just because they're operating under my tower doesn't mean I'm in charge of them. I'm under no disillusions that they wouldn't hesitate to poke their noses where it doesn't belong if it was for their gain," she told the girl. "So why are you here, Carter?"

"Look, I know the two of us didn't always get along," Carter said after a moment, "But growing up, I'm sure she told you the same stories she told me. Dad always wanted to shield me from the world, but Aunt Peggy would make sure I knew that I was just as capable of fighting as my brothers. I've looked up to her my entire life. It's why I joined SHIELD. And now that she's got her memories back, I was hoping I'd be able to see her and get to know her. I used to visit her before in the home, but it wasn't the same. You know that as well as I do. I just want to talk to her."

She nodded, "Okay," she said to the girl. "I'm not her keeper. I just wanted to make sure you were here for the right reasons. Uncle Daniel has already said he has no issues with you going to see her. So if you just ask JARVIS to take you to the seventy-fifth level, you can visit with her for as long as you like, whenever you like. I'm not going to prevent you from seeing her, not when she means so much to all of us. I know what it's like for her to come into your life and tell you can be meant for so much more than the rest of the world tells you that you can be."

Sharon looked surprised at that, but she offered Toni a genuine smile.

"Thank you, Stark," Carter said to her. "For everything. I know Ava and Dr Banner also helped but thank you for bringing her back for all of us. I know you did it for yourself as well, but it means the world to me that now I'm going to have a chance to get to know my aunt; a chance I wouldn't have had without you."

"Of course," Toni smiled back at the younger woman.

She watched as Sharon Carter exited back into the elevator and headed towards Aunt Peggy's floor. She wasn't sure the two of them would ever be friends, but they understood each other. And they both cared about the Carter-Sousas. So for now, that was enough.


She really hated training, as strange as that was to admit. She wished she could say she liked it more now that it had become a routine in her life, or that it was something she liked that helped her while being a superhero.

But the truth was simple; she hated it.

She hated getting knocked down on her ass, and how sore her body would be for days afterwards. She hated limping out of her and Steve's bed as the pain the following morning settled in. She hated everything about working out.

Except when it was with Steve. But really that had more to do with the fact that more often than not they got distracted and training turned into other enjoyable activities. And after one too many times of Romanoff walking in on them, she'd decreed that the two of them weren't allowed to train together anymore given that she wasn't actually training.

Which was regrettable.

And she point-blank refused to train with the superspy given the woman had no qualms with landing Toni on her back on a regular basis.

Clint was a different story; he was a civilian with a weapon he fought with. Not like Natasha who was trained to be a weapon. Clint understood her; the two of them had a primary weapon that they fought with and only fought without their weapons if they were forced to. So he trained her accordingly.

That didn't mean she didn't still get flipped over onto her back. Because she did. Quite a bit. Just like now.

She groaned as Clint stood over her, smirking teasingly.

"You're making this too easy, Stark," he laughed, as he offered a hand to help her up.

"Can we just call it a day already?" she asked, tiredly. "Didn't we train enough?"

"We've only been down here for twenty minutes," he said with a grin, "You know as well as I do that if we go back up before a full hour has passed that Nat will be on both of our asses. We gotta stay and train for a bit longer. And as terrifying I find you, Nat's way scarier."

She grumbled to herself, as she braced herself to go again.

"I'm going to come at you from the top this time," he said to her, "I won't tell you the rest of my plays, but see if you can land in a few hits okay? Before you fall on your back again?"

She stuck her tongue out at him but quickly put it back as he came at her.

She ducked to the side, lightly punching his stomach, as he grabbed her wrist and threw her over his shoulder and back onto the ground again.

She sighed.

"Miss Stark, I hate to interrupt but I have located the Winter Soldier," JARVIS said, and she quickly sat up, freezing.

"Where?" she asked, quickly getting to her feet and looking at the screen in the gym.

"Linz, Austria," JARVIS responded. She looked at the screen and saw footage of the Winter Soldier exiting a small convenience store. His face was mostly covered, but there unmistakably was James Buchanan Barnes.

"I need to go to Austria," she said, "I'm sorry to cut this short Clint, but you understand right?"

"Wait like you're just going to go now?" Clint asked, "Aren't you going to tell the team that you're heading to Europe to bring back Barnes? Shouldn't Steve at least go with you?"

She shook her head, "I don't want to spook him. If too many of us go, he may think we're attacking him and flee. And worse, we don't know what state his mind is in so we don't want to endanger anyone. It's better if I go alone."

"And Steve?" Clint asked her gently, "Aren't you going to tell him that you found his best friend?"

"I can't," she shook her head, "I don't want to get his hopes up. And I don't want to force Barnes to come with us if he doesn't want to. I love Steve but know he wouldn't take no for an answer if Barnes didn't want to come. I'll just make it up to him when I get back."

She turned to leave but he grabbed her arm, stopping her.

"You still can't go alone, Toni," Clint said firmly. "I'm coming with you. We have no idea what mindset the soldier's in. You said that yourself. You cannot go alone into an unknown situation. I won't tell Steve where we're going, but I'm coming with you. That's nonnegotiable. And if you attempt to leave without me, I'm telling Steve and you know he'll come after you."

She let out a frustrated sigh.

"I can't put any of you in danger. And I'm just tracking a lead. For all I know, he'll be long gone by time I get there," she said, trying to dissuade him.

"Then we'll have a fun weekend," Clint shrugged, "We'll buy some food, see some sights. No big deal. It's been a while since I've been to Austria, and I've been meaning to go back for quite some time."

She looked at his face, and she could tell that there was no way she was going to be able to talk him out of it. Not when he seemed so set in his ways.

"Fine," she said with a sigh, "I'll tell Steve I'm heading to Austria for some SI business and that you wanted to come as back up just in case. He has a mission to Panama so he can't come even if he wanted to. But if you breathe a word of this to anyone, you're a dead man, Brenton."

"Yes Ma-am," he mock-saluted.

She glowered at him but led the way as she prepared for her trip to Europe. They had a rogue soldier to find.