AN: Wow, thank you so much for all your reviews. Now we hear Charlie's thoughts, and Bella has more to think about

My thanks as always to MeteorOnAMoonlessNight and Midnight Cougar for their help

Disclaimer: SM owns it all but Builderward is mine


Boyfriends of Christmas Past Chapter 6

Summary

A trip back home for the holidays shows Bella everything she didn't know had been missing from her life.


Chapter 6

Bella

By the time we reached home, the silence in the truck was almost unbearable. Alec glared at me when I climbed back into the cab but said nothing. It was only a matter of time until he confronted me with accusations, and although I'd done nothing wrong, I knew I wasn't invested in our relationship any longer; I just didn't want to create a negative atmosphere for the Christmas break.

Alec and Dad managed to unload the tree, while I climbed into the attic to retrieve the decorations and the tree stand. The three of us worked together to get the tree upright, the tip brushing the ceiling in front of the living room window.

We stood back, admiring it, the atmosphere around us now calm and almost happy. Until Alec's phone rang again. As he stepped outside the door onto the porch to take it in private, Dad looked over at me, but didn't say anything. Instead, he opened the box of decorations sitting on the coffee table.

After eating the lasagne I made for dinner, Dad and I emptied the box of tree ornaments and room decorations, checking them over and reminiscing about their significance before adding them to the tree, having already added tinsel and lights.

Alec's phone rang consistently, and each time he stepped outside to answer it and talk to his agent, or colleagues, or friends, I became more annoyed. It was Christmas Eve, and normal partners would be spending this time together. He should have been getting to know my dad.

Around ten o'clock, I made hot chocolate for the three of us, piling the cups with marshmallows. Alec's drink cooled on the coffee table while he talked outside. Dad sipped his drink, and I knew he wanted to say something.

"You can tell me if I'm out of line, Bella, but I don't understand why Alec would come with you when he's spending most of the time on his phone and not with you."

I sighed heavily and sipped my hot drink. "You're not wrong, Dad. He's a very driven man, and he wants to stay in control, so he spends all his time making calls to make sure he knows what everyone is doing."

"Hmpf! But on Christmas Eve!" Dad wasn't impressed. "From what I've seen, his priorities just aren't right. Have to be honest, not liking the way he talks to you, either."

"He's insecure, Dad," I said as if it explained everything. I took a deep breath and swiveled to face him, tucking my leg underneath me on the sofa. "Honesty?"

"Always the best policy, Bella."

"I'm not sure we're right for each other," I began. "When we first got together, everything was great, but Alec has shown—let's say—some less than desirable characteristics."

"What exactly does that mean?" Dad demanded. "He doesn't hurt you, does he?" Leaping to his feet, Dad headed toward the back door and the porch.

"Dad, Dad." I followed him, grabbing hold of his arm before he could wrench open the door. "No, of course, he hasn't hurt me. You know I'd never have stayed if he had. Come and sit down."

Looking at Alec's shadow on the other side of the door, he reluctantly returned to his seat on the sofa.

"I just meant he's jealous and possessive. I guess it's because he cares, and for a while, it was okay. But, recently, it's been bothering me and I've been having second thoughts. I don't feel as strongly for him as I did in the beginning." I paused, testing the words out in my head before I spoke them aloud. "I'm not as happy as I expected to be; I think my feelings for Alec have changed."

"Is it something to do with Edward?" Dad asked. He didn't elaborate, and I knew he'd caught that moment we'd shared at the tree lot.

"Not really, although seeing Edward brought back some memories of when we were together. I don't think—no, I know—I don't feel even ten percent of what I should for Alec. You know what I mean?"

Dad was quiet for a while, and I didn't think he was going to answer. Eventually, he let out a deep breath.

"You know, it was hard to let your mother go all those years ago. Her heart wasn't here with you and me. Even after she left, I loved her for a long time, until one day I finally understood why she couldn't stay. We can't help where the heart flies, Bella, and you should follow your heart. If it's not with Alec, then you owe it to yourself to do what makes you happy."

It was the longest speech I'd ever heard him make, and more information about his feelings for my mother than he'd ever imparted before. Further conversation ceased as Alec finished his call and returned to the living room.

He gulped down the now cold chocolate drink, then slid himself between me and the arm of the sofa, his arm pulling me even closer.

"Shall we watch a movie, Bella?" he asked. "Anything you want to see, Charlie?"

"Nah, I'm off to bed. Unless you want any help, Bells?"

"No, it's fine, Dad. I'll see you in the morning. What time are we heading over to the Blacks'?"

"Not until around eleven, okay?"

I nodded, watching as he headed upstairs to get ready for bed. Alec grabbed the remote, switching on the television and flicking through the channels. As soon as Dad's bedroom door closed, Alec turned to me, leaned over, and pushed me back into the seat cushions. His lips landed on mine with bruising force, his tongue invading my mouth.

With so much going on in my head, and the confusion surrounding my feelings for Alec, I didn't want to let this go any further. Sex would only muddy the waters, and I needed to work out where we went—if anywhere—from here.

I managed to get my hands between us, pushing against Alec's body. His weight was pushing me into the cushions and I could feel his excitement pressing against me. Twisting my head to one side, I broke the contact between my lips and his.

"Alec," I whispered. "Alec, we can't. My dad..."

"We can be quiet, Bella, or we could go to your room. Let's celebrate Christmas together."

Alec's breath against my ear was hot, and his body heavy on mine. I felt stifled and hemmed in and pushed hard against him.

"No, Alec. I can't."

Reluctantly, Alec got up and threw himself down beside me, a scowl on his face.

"Is this how it's going to be for the whole of our time here?"

"I don't know, Alec. I'm just not comfortable having sex in my dad's house. It feels awkward. You can understand that, can't you?" I knew that wasn't exactly right, but I wasn't quite ready to say more to him.

Alec's glare told me not only didn't he understand, but he also didn't really care. Instead of answering me, he resumed flicking through television channels, settling on one of the films he'd acted in.

You can be such a drama queen, Alec, I thought. Why can't you, for once, accept what I ask?

I headed for the kitchen to finish the dishes, and when I'd put the last of them away in the cupboards, I returned to the living room. I stood in the doorway and tucked my hands into the back pockets of my jeans, waiting for Alec to turn and acknowledge me.

When he made no move to look at me or talk to me, I sighed at his childish behavior. "Alec, I'm going to get ready for bed now. Do you want some help making up your bed before I go? Or would you like to use the bathroom before me?"

"I can manage." His answer was short and sharp. I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

"Well, goodnight then."

I didn't expect him to answer me and I wasn't surprised when he ignored me. I leaned over the back of the settee and kissed him on the cheek, then quietly climbed the stairs to get ready for bed.

The temperature had dropped considerably, and I was glad I'd thought to bring pajamas with me. So, even though my bed was cold when I slid under the duvet, I warmed up quickly. I could vaguely hear the television from downstairs.

A quiet clattering sound pulled me out of the sleep I'd drifted into. I lay still for a second trying to trace what it was and where the sound originated. I checked the clock on my nightstand as a chime from my cell indicated an incoming text message.

A glance told me the time was 12:05 a.m. Christmas Day.

Come to the window, Bella - E

The clatter repeated, and I scrambled out of bed, almost tripping over the rug in my hurry to reach the window. Hoping Dad hadn't neglected the window maintenance, I slowly slid the sash up, breathing a sigh of relief when it slid quietly open.

"Edward?" I whisper-shouted. "What are you doing out there?"

"It's Christmas Day, so I came to wish you Merry Christmas."

Despite the cold, I leaned out over the sill and grinned at the sight of him leaning against the tree in the front yard, his face half-lit by the street light beyond the fence. The summer Edward left for Chicago, he'd scaled the tree and we'd comforted each other many nights.

My face heated at the memory of how eager I'd been to take the final step, to give myself to him. I'd felt rejected when he refused, although I could feel the evidence of his desire. He'd assured me he wanted to, but he didn't feel it was right when he'd be leaving in a few short weeks.

Shaking the memories away, I grinned. "You idiot, you'll freeze to death out there. Not to mention, my father might shoot you if he thinks you're an intruder. Besides, for all you knew, I could've been with Alec."

His grin widened. "I sneaked a look in the window around back. He's watching television."

"Edward!" I was a little shocked he'd wanted to speak to me without the presence of Alec, but I couldn't help the thrill that went through me.

"Forgive me?" He pushed his bottom lip out in an outrageously adorable pout.

I giggled, feeling seventeen again. I'd forgotten how good he'd always made me feel, how happy I'd been.

"I should tell my dad I have a stalker, shouldn't I?"

"Now who's trying to get me shot?" Edward's low laugh, and his cheeky grin, brought a smile to my face, too.

"Of course, I forgive you," I said softly. "I'll call you about that coffee in a day or so, okay?"

"Okay, I'll see you soon, Bella. Have a great day tomorrow."

He raised his hand, then turned and trotted across the snow-covered grass, disappearing out of sight. A couple of minutes later, I heard a vehicle start and drive off.

"You, too," I murmured. I stood at the window for a couple more minutes before sliding it closed.

I fell asleep with a smile on my face, once again dreaming of Edward Cullen.

~ oOo ~