There is a serious lack of Clarke/Luna stories. And Clarke/anyone that isn't Bellamy or Lexa. More on that at the bottom.
Anyways, this is like my first ever attempt at smut lol. It's something I want to better at writing, so why not?
"Satellite aligned," the sensor said filling Clarke with a confusing mix of relief and fear.
She had to run.
The climb down from the satellite tower had been awful enough but coupled with the bulky spacesuit and the incoming nuclear storm, it made for a rather daunting journey back to Becca's bunker. The rushing winds had almost tipped the tower over before she could get down.
Clarke was running full tilt, but deep down she knew. There was no way out of this. She would not make it back to the rocket on time. If her friends wanted to survive, they would have to power up the rocket and leave the earth.
And leave her on this death trap of a planet.
It would hurt to be alone., However, it would hurt her more if they had. stayed and gotten killed because they waited for her. She may not make it out of this alive, but if they did then it would be worth it.
They had done the right thing and left her behind. The satellite dish was aligned and they'd survive on the Ark until it was safe to come back down. The Ark had enough resources for six people even if it was only the ring. She was happy and confident that they would survive.
It still hurt to be left behind.
Her legs burned as she ran as fast she could. The spacesuit was dragging her back, but she kept pushing all the while. Praimfaya was on her heels. The sound of the Earth being ravaged by a second nuclear apocalypse was all-encompassing and soul-crushing.
Finally, though, Clarke spotted the bunker. Its heavy metal door still open. She ran. Her body was awash with adrenaline and the thumping of her heart almost drowned out the nuclear storm.
With a smoothness borne from desperation, Clarke rolled into the house and shut the door in one motion. For a few seconds, she expected the nuclear storm to smite her all the same, but death did not come calling.
For now.
Clarke hobbled to her feet and she removed her helmet. She only realised now that the visor was heavily damaged. Clarke walked through the first parts of Becca's bunker. It was a testament to the woman's genius that the power was still on.
In a cruel almost cosmic twist, the lights switched off right then and there. Clarke dragged herself towards the bathroom. Her throat was parched and her body was caked in sweat. The spacesuit only made the feeling worse.
Once she got to the bathroom, Clarke was about to open the tap before she stopped. Her mind was hazy and she was on the verge of collapsing, but she still had enough about her to realise that drinking water was probably a bad idea.
What with the nuclear storm polluting everything in its path and all that. She barely felt alive as is. What would happen if she actually drank some water?
Slowly and angrily, Clarke turned away from the sink. There was still some food in the bunker somewhere or so she hoped. She was about to head out and get something when she caught sight of something horrifying.
Her face.
Dark black blisters had formed across her face. It was as if a veil had been lifted from her mind. She was now all too aware of how each sore pulsed and burned. The sensation seemed to spread across her body causing her to scramble out the spacesuit.
The second she did so, bolts of pain erupted all over her body. She had only gotten it halfway off but already she could see that the blisters had spread across her body. Black blood trailed down her arms, the blisters had burst from her removal of the spacesuit.
It hurt.
Clarke's hands were slick with her own blood as she got the rest of the spacesuit off. She walked through the bunker in a daze. She did not stop until she got to the couch in the living room and she collapsed on top of it aggravating her wounds.
Her mind and body were tired. Not just from what she had just been through, but also what laid ahead. She closed her eyes hoping to sleep. To go to sleep and wake up in five years with all her friends back safe and sound.
Tears leaked from her eyes as the sound of the storm washed over.
Her friends were safe. Down in the bunker and up in space. They would be fine.
She was all alone.
It took Clarke a few hours to wake up.
A few hours after that she ate a sliver of the remaining food. It would probably last her a very long time. Even if she gorged then there would be enough for at least eight months.
The dried and preserved food wasn't quite as delectable as what the Grounders made, but right now it tasted divine to her. The water was also drinkable which was another blessing. Clarke finished up her meal before inspecting the damage done to her body.
Her blisters were all gone without exception. As a matter of fact, Clarke felt rejuvenated. She had a buzz to her that she had lacked for a while now. The good news was that nightblood was a very effective filter for radiation. The bad news was that nightblood was a very effective filter for radiation.
Everything that had happened. The months of preparation, the Ark explosion, the list, the Conclave, stealing the bunker...
Being left alone...
All of it was pointless. Nightblood would have saved them all. If her mother hadn't destroyed Becca's machine then they could have known that for a fact. They had scraped Luna dry of her bone marrow for nothing which led to her taking a dark turn.
People were meant to be responsible for their own actions. Luna's actions were fully her own choice. That being said, if it hadn't been for Skaikru's cruelty, she would have never gone down that path.
Clarke and Luna, in the short time they had been around each other, had not had a good relationship. Clarke had tried to force the Flame onto Luna and was rebuffed. Luna had refused to help with the City of Light which meant a lot more people got caught under ALIE's thrall.
By all means, they could have rejected Luna when she had come to Arkadia but Clarke could not have done that. Despite what everyone thought, she hated having to make the hard choices.
It seemed to always come down to her.
The fireball at the dropship. Killing Finn. Not killing Titus. Irradiating Mount Weather. Destroying the City of Light. Making the list of survivors. Every one of these decisions and more weighed heavily on her. The reactions of the people around her were also an added weight.
They thought she was a monster. All of them. Her mother, Bellamy, Raven, Octavia and everyone in-between. Jaha had all but admitted as much, but of everyone, he seemed to be the most understanding of how she felt.
The self-loathing and anger and anguish that she carried with her wherever she went. The man that had killed her father understood her the most. Clarke used to despise Jaha for what he had done. And yet, she had killed hundreds, if not thousands, of mothers and fathers and children.
If she were Trikru, her body wouldn't have enough room for all the scars.
That didn't change her current circumstances, though. The storm seemed to have died down and the bunker was now in a sort of low-power mode. Clarke was sure it would eventually die and so she had to take the lay of the land.
The walls of the room were almost closing in on her like those booby traps in movies. Only this time, it felt like her mind was the one getting crushed into pieces.
It was with that in mind that Clarke packed enough food for over a week and as much water as she dared to carry. The bag was not as heavy as she would have liked. The heavier the bag, the more food and water she had.
She could always return later if she had to.
For now, though, she had to get out.
She was still scared. Scared for what she may find. Scared that she may not find her way back to the bunker. Scared that the second she opened the door, death would come for her. And be it fast or slow, Clarke did not want to die.
And so she did not leave.
The bunker was like poison for the soul. The longer Clarke stayed there, the more her mind would wander. She'd think of her mother and her friends and everyone and her heart would ache at the thought of never seeing them.
It took her three days to leave.
Clarke had set out sometime before sunrise. The lack of any sort of heat would probably help her conserve energy and resources. However, even without the sun out, Clarke could see that all of their guesses had been very wrong.
The Earth was fine.
More than fine, really.
Raven's estimates had predicted that all plants and water would be vaporised by the storm. They had been based on ALIE's predictions of how things go. They had both been wrong.
Trees still towered into the sky and Clarke was forced to use a paddle boat to cross the water that separated Becca's island from the mainland. There was still an eerie atmosphere.
The water surface was covered with the dead bodies of its former inhabitants and there was practically no sound whatsoever. However, enough plants and water had survived that Clarke was sure that this was probably the worst-case scenario.
Or so she hoped. There was probably enough radiation in the air to kill non-Nightbloods.
The good news had not stopped there. A few hours before noon, Clarke had managed to find and unearth the Rover. It was probably the first but of luck, she had had in months.
It had only taken her a few hours to get it operational and Clarke was free to drive the Rover. It took a few false starts, but soon she had gotten the hang of it. She was driving rather fast and recklessly, but she couldn't find it within her to care.
It was not like she had to look out for other cars, after all.
She only had one destination in mind.
Polis.
With the nightblood in her bones, she could save all of the people in the bunker from what was bound to be a torturous experience. And with all the greenery and water, there was bound to be enough resources to go around. It would suck to be drilled over and over, but it would be worth it.
It took a few hours of driving by ravaged forests and a few forced detours, but finally, she spotted it in the distance. Polis. Today had been such a good day for her that she should have realised her luck was bound to run out.
She spotted the Trikru capitol and her heart sank. It had been hit by the storm hard, but that was to be expected. What she had not expected was what happened to the tower or rather the lack of a tower.
The Polis Tower was gone.
It had taken Clarke all of a few hours to realise that the wreckage would take her years to clear on her own. She had nearly been crushed by falling debris right as she started. It was a terrible omen if you were the type to believe in that stuff.
It would take Clarke a few hours to give up. It had to be around four in the afternoon and her muscles burnt with exhaustion. She had left the Rover at the entrance to Polis as well as all her supplies.
She had to leave.
Everyone down there was trapped.
Polis was an even more depressing scene than the bunker. There were still many buildings intact, but it was a now a ghost town—a far cry from her first time here.
Clarke was walking towards the Rover when she heard something from a building close to her left. She would have thought it was her mind playing tricks on her, but when she saw a rat sneak underneath the door of a nearby building, she sprang into action.
It was the first sign of sentient life that Clarke had seen. It may have been a rat, but Clarke was desperate for any form of good news. If there were even just a few more rats running around then more animals might have survived elsewhere.
Maybe she could actually have better meals than what was in Becca's bunker.
Clarke walked into the building and to her surprise, it was in good condition. It was shielded on all sides by other buildings which probably explained how it had not been destroyed. The Tower on the other hand was very exposed and very vulnerable. The first few floors collapsing was probably enough to bring it down.
Clarke looked around the room before she caught sight of the rat darting up the stairs. She followed suit, but she froze when she got to the top of the landing. There was a trail of blood leading to the room at the end of the hall.
The red droplets were visible even in the afternoon sun. Clarke cautiously walked down the hallway until she reached a room filled with interesting stuff like closets, scattered weapons and of course a corpse.
Clarke walked over to the corpse. It, or rather she, was lying face down on the ground. There wasn't a large pool of blood around her so Clarke assumed that the victim had succumbed to the radiation.
The rat from earlier was sniffing around the corpse and Clarke chased it away. There was no need for this woman to suffer any indignity in death. Clarke laid a hand on the woman's shoulder and she paused for a second before turning her over.
"Oh, my God."
It was Luna.
Clarke choked back a sob. Luna's eyes were closed and at first glance, she appeared to be resting. However, Clarke knew that she was dead. Octavia would not have spared Luna. Nor would Luna have simply given up.
And yet, there were no visible wounds.
The implication unsettled her. If Luna hadn't been killed by Octavia then what had killed her? Clarke became all too aware of the beating of her heart. Maybe nightblood wasn't the panacea she had thought it was.
If Luna had died of radiation poisoning then surely Clarke would follow suit. The only question was how long it would take. Maybe it had already started now and Clarke didn't know. She knew what the symptoms of radiation poisoning were.
First—
"Mhm," said the 'corpse' below her.
Clarke froze. In a hurry, she began to check on Luna. Her skin was warm almost hot to the touch. Her eyes seemed to be fluttering from behind her eyelids. For the acid test, Clarke put two of her fingers to Luna's neck.
A pulse. Warm and rapid and strong and alive.
"Oh my god," Clarke said as she looked at the unconscious woman before her, "You're alive."
She was alive. Luna was alive. Octavia had not killed her during the Conclave. A crushing relief filled Clarke's body and heaving sobs ravaged her body as she leaned into Luna's body.
Luna and Clarke did not know each other very well. Their relationship was frosty at best and downright hostile at worst. And despite all of that, Clarke could not stop the wave of relief that washed over her.
It had not taken Clarke to carry Luna back to the Rover. Luna towered over Clarke normally and from what Clarke had seen she was in good shape.
Luna had just lost a bit of weight. Far more than was normal or should be possible. Her skin was dry and her limbs hung loosely. In normal cases, Luna should have succumbed to radiation, starvation or dehydration.
Yet, she was still alive.
Normal humans would not have survived any of what she had been through. Luna was different, though. Just like how Clarke was different. The nightblood must have kept Luna alive for longer but it seemed to come at the cost of nearly putting her into a coma.
Luna was in bad shape. She hadn't eaten any food or drank any water for days now. Maybe if Clarke has not been so afraid to leave the bunker, she could have gotten here on time and Luna wouldn't be on the verge of—
"No, I can't think like that," Clarke said to herself before looking down at Luna, "I know I'm probably the last person you'd want to see when you wake up, but I don't care."
Clarke walked around the Rover and put Luna in the passenger seat. Raven being Raven, had included a feature that made the chair recline backwards. Clarke made sure Luna was laying comfortably before attaching the seatbelt.
She switched over to the driver side and started the engine. Clarke had a feeling she would return to Polis. The thought of there being over a thousand people beneath her feet struggling and potentially being down there forever was horrific.
She'd find a way to get them out. No matter how it would take her.
Clarke started the engine and she looked towards Luna who was still delirious. Her lips were cracked and caked with dried blood. She switched off the engine and she got a water bottle out the back.
Thankfully, Luna wasn't entirely unconscious. At the very least, she was lucid enough to choke down an entire bottle of water from Clarke. However, instead of the water pushing her to wake up, it seemed to do the opposite and Luna was fast asleep.
Clarke started the Rover again and she gave one last look to Luna before driving off.
"I won't let you die."
Getting Luna to the bunker had proven to be rather difficult. The paddle boat was not the biggest and trying to keep Luna in a comfortable position while rowing across the water kept Clarke on red alert.
It took them a while, but soon they were docked on the other end. Clarke put her bag on before carrying Luna up the slope to the bunker. This was the hardest part of Clarke's day. Her arms still ached from all the rowing she'd just done not to mention carrying Luna across Polis.
Clarke wanted to take a break, but she knew that if she did then it would be twice as hard to start again. So, she kept marching forward. Frequently, she'd look down to Luna to see what shape she was in.
A small smile was on her face which was good news. The late afternoon sun gave Luna a warm glow to her skin. It was a far better sight than the deathly pallor she'd had when Clarke had first found her. Occasionally, Luna would mumble something in her sleep, but it was always too garbled for Clarke to hear anything.
"Finally," Clarke said as she finally reached the bunker, "No offence, but my arms are killing me, right now."
Clarke walked into the bunker and she laid Luna down on the couch as gently as she could. Her arms were all bur flooded with relief and Clarke closed the bunker door before she collapsed on one of the smaller couches.
Today had been exhausting. Both mentally and physically. Clarke forced herself up as she went into the small kitchen. There were mostly dry foods in there, but it also had what she needed.
She made a rehydration shake in a large bottle. It was essentially just water mixed with some salt and sugar. It was a popular remedy on the Ark when people were hit hard by water and food rationing.
She left the bottle on the table in front of Luna before collapsing onto the couch again. Clarke intended to only take a small nap and then try to wake Luna up.
Unfortunately, within minutes, she was deep in slumber.
Luna's eyes opened and a blank ceiling met her gaze.
Where was she? How had she gotten here? Was she dead?
Intermittent memories flashed through her mind of the past few...however long it had been. Her declaration for the Conclave, drowning Roan and then searching the house for the Skaikru girl. Then a flash of pain and then nothing.
After that, Luna wasn't sure if she had died or not. She remembered the world shaking and the wind howling and the sky screaming before nothing. She had thought it was a vision of what awaited her in death.
Punishment for reverting to what she had once been. A monster. A killer. A devil.
And yet, an angel had rescued her. Luna couldn't even open her eyes fully, but she just remembered the brilliant hair and eyes of her saviour. She remembered floating through the air and now she laid on what she always imagined clouds felt like.
After a few seconds, she was able to move her body and she rose quickly. Too quickly. Her foot banged into something causing a loud noise to emanate through the room. She caught sight of a shadow moving to her right.
"Huh? Is that you, Luna? You need—"
Ignoring all pain and discomfort, Luna leapt towards the shadow and pinned the woman (judging from her voice) back down to the couch. Luna's head was spinning and her muscles shook with exhaustion but she was still able to speak.
"Who are you?" her voice was dry and scratchy, "Where am I? Why am I here?"
The questions flew out of her in a rush as her curiosity got the better of her. Luna's eyes began to adjust to the minimal lighting in the room and she was able to catch sight of the woman's light hair.
The voice sounded familiar too.
"Calm down, Luna," the woman said calmly as if Luna wasn't pinning her down, "It's me, Clarke. You're safe."
Clarke? Her dazed mind took a few moments to place the name until anger surged through her again. She placed her hands closer to Clarke's neck as she grabbed the collar of the girl's jacket. Luna leaned forward and a snarl was tearing st her face.
"I should kill you for what your people did to me," Luna's words were a whisper as she stared into Clarke's eyes, "I trusted you and you treated me like some sort of animal."
The pain of being drilled into was all too fresh in Luna's mind. She had only heard about the experiences in the Mountain after it had fallen. Never had she thought that she would be subjected to something similar.
"You're right," Clarke said as her hands gently wrapped around Luna's wrists, "We treated you like a tool and for that I am sorry. You lost your friends, your comrades, your people."
Clarke began to push Luna back from where she held her. Despite herself, Luna felt her fingers loosen as the Skaikru girl sat up to meet her gaze. Luna was rooted to the spot as Clarke entangled their hands.
"We're the last two people on Earth," Clarke said causing a needle of despair to form deep within Luna, "The bunker is buried under, uh, Lexa's tower. My friends are stuck in space for five years and maybe even more than that."
"For three days, I stayed here," Clarke said and her breath tickled Luna as she became all too aware of their closeness, "I didn't want to face the reality that I was doomed. Doomed to die alone while everyone I loved lived on."
In the evening light, Luna was able to see tears tracking down the girl's face. It caused a burst of sadness within her that mixed with the residual anger she still felt at any and all things Skaikru. Her mind was in turmoil, but she pushed past it as Clarke continued to speak.
"I know you hate me and Skaikru and for good reason," Clarke said and her eyes seemed to cut right into Luna's very being, "I knew all of this when I found you and brought you back to the place where we tried to drain you dry."
The revelation of where they were barely registered as Clarke began tracing circles on the back of Luna's hands. It was almost certainly done on reflex, but Luna being as unused to human contact as she was, it set something aflame within her.
"I just hate being alone," Clarke said almost to herself, "If you don't want to be here—"
"I do want to be here," Luna said before Clarke could finish that sentence, "The situation may not be ideal, but you saved me."
"I could think of many worse things than being here with you."
Clarke, unlike her usual self, seemed to be at a loss for words. Her eyes met Luna's own and Luna noted their breathing had synchronised. Their current position must have played a part in that— their faces were so close to each other that Luna could feel Clarke's breath. Luna was straddling Clarke who still traced circles into Luna's hands.
Their eyes stared into each other for long before Clarke seemed to jerk back. The movement caught Luna off-guard and she hesitated for just a touch before moving all the way off the other girl. Clarke rose to her feet gingerly and Luna kept her eyes pinned on the younger woman.
Clarke reached for the table and she handed Luna a bottle. Luna took it from Clarke and she very nearly dropped it when their fingers brushed against each other. Clarke didn't seem to notice which was a good thing in Luna's books.
"You're dehydrated," Clarke said as she moved off the couch to a wall, "Drink that. It will make you feel better."
She took a curious sniff and a rather sweet smell filled her nose. Her throat felt as dry as a desert and so she took a long swig from the bottle. The sweet mixture tickled her tongue and at that moment it was probably the best thing Luna had ever drunk.
Suddenly, the room was filled with light and it took her a few seconds to adjust to the sudden brightness. When her eyes recovered she traced to a single bulb that was burning brightly. It reminded her of the harsh lights that Skaikru used in their healer's room.
"I'll make us some food," Clarke said as she walked across the room, "Your body isn't in good shape after the Conclave so you shouldn't move around so much."
How could she have forgotten about the Conclave? She had tried to condemn everyone to a horrible death out of anger. If anyone deserved a horrible death, it was her. All the anger and rage and frustration she had felt was now replaced by a pang of crushing guilt.
Why did Clarke save her? Surely, it would have been safer to kill her while she had been indisposed. Instead, she was choosing to nurse Luna back to health.
As she heard Clarke move around in the kitchen, Luna could not help, but feel that she did not deserve any of this whatsoever. Even after Clarke served them some food, Luna ate it all without saying much.
Her guilt and shame prevented her from saying anything beyond thanking Clarke for the food. She noticed that her portion dwarfed that of Clarke's which only served to aggravate her guilt more. Luna was grateful for the food, but it still ate away at her to see Clarke prioritise Luna's health over her own.
All this after Luna had attacked Clarke just a few minutes.
Why was Clarke being so nice?
They had never had a friendly conversation before today and yet Clarke seemed to be going out of her way to help Luna. This wouldn't last. It couldn't. Nothing good ever lasted in her world. It would only take one misstep from her and Clarke would just let her fall.
It was no less than she deserved, though.
A yawn escaped her mouth as her exhaustion came creeping back. Clarke rose from her seat and walked towards causing Luna to tense up just a little bit.
"There's a bedroom down that way," Clarke said pointing towards a hallway, "You need a lot of bed rest before you'll be at 100%. Let me help you—"
Clarke had reached for Luna to help her stand up, but in a moment of madness and panic, Luna tried to stand up on her own. This was a mistake. A wave of nausea rushed over her and she misstepped as her sense of balance was lost.
Luna was expecting to fall to the cold and hard ground, but instead, two warm arms wrapped around her and stopped her fall. Luna looked up at Clarke and she was sure her surprise was painted across her face.
"I've got you."
Clarke said her voice just a bit hoarse perhaps from tiredness, "Let me help you."
It sounded like a request, but it was an order.
"Okay."
An order Luna, to her shame, was all too happy to follow.
Clarke was shorter than Luna so it was a bit awkward, but they made it work. She also seemed to be surprisingly strong as she took on some of Luna's weight without issue. Luna was flush against Clarke and admittedly the aches plaguing Luna was what allowed her to keep her focus.
Clarke guided her into a room with a gentleness that was unlike the harsh and somewhat cold exterior Clarke usually displayed. Clearly, that was a front Clarke put when the situation called for it. The kindness Clarke was showing her now though was just too earnest to be a front or a trick.
"I've got you," Clarke said as she guided Luna towards the bed, "It's just a few more steps. Just lay down slowly."
Luna felt like her muscles were about to give way, but Clarke caught on. Clarke tightened her grip on Luna and helped her lay down. Once Luna was on the bed, Clarke's hand lingered on Luna's shoulder. It was a feather-light touch and yet it felt as strong as steel.
"I'll get you some clothes," Clarke said and her eyes traced up and down Luna's body, "It would probably be best if I got you out of those."
Clarke's hand slid off of Luna and she watched as Clarke dug around in the closet. There was a surprisingly high number of clothes all in pristine condition. Eventually, Clarke got out a few shirts and shorts.
Ordinarily, Luna wouldn't be embarrassed by this, but as things were she'd probably need some help. Clarke must have realised this too as she failed to meet Luna's gaze as she handed the clothes over.
"Thank you," Luna said placing the clothes down on the bedside table.
Luna did try to get this out of the way on her own. She was able to sit up and remove one of her boots before her vision swam. She almost fell over but again Clarke stopped her from crashing to the floor.
"Do you need some help?"
She did, but Clarke had already done enough for her already.
"I will be fine," Luna said and she frowned a bit as Clarke nodded and made to leave. Inexplicably, a part of Luna wasn't quite ready to be left alone just yet.
"Clarke?"
"Yes?" Clarke asked and the concerned look she gave Luna sent a warm pulse through her.
"I need your help."
Yesterday, and hopefully today, were better days than the rest she had spent on Earth. They were also better than the days on the Ark following her father's death, but that wasn't a particularly high bar to clear.
She was still unsure of how her friends were doing on the Go-Sci ring and the thought of the rubble covering the bunker was also an upsetting thought. However, selfishly, she had someone with her.
That counted for a lot especially after she had all but accepted being alone for the next five years at a minimum.
Things were not perfect, of course. Clarke had slept in the guest bedroom and her sleep had been bad at best and fitful at worse. The bed was comfortable and her stomach was full, but her mind was still haunted by all she had done.
Clarke knew that one day her guilt would come to pass or that's what she hoped. The hope that one day, she'd be able to look herself in the mirror and not feel disappointed by what she saw was a driving factor in keeping her active each day.
It was part of what drove her to prepare food for her and Luna. Well, that and hunger. Now that there was another person with her, she felt just a bit more...alive. There was still a lot of...awkwardness between Clarke and Luna, but she hoped that it would fade with time.
Clarke was sick and tired of being the fearless and ruthless leader. At her core, it was not who she was. It was a mask she had to take on and wear all to protect her people. Now, though, the last thing Clarke wanted to be was that version of herself.
It was why she had chosen to talk Luna down after she had attacked Clarke last evening. Normally, Clarke would not be able to fight Luna off. There was a massive gulf in what they were capable of, after all.
However, when Luna had pinned her Clarke had not been even a little afraid for her life. A part of it was that she knew that she could have overpowered Luna. Her hold hadn't been strong and Clarke had chosen to stay still more so to keep things calm than because Luna was holding her down.
The bigger reason she had talked Luna down was when they were close to each other, Clarke finally saw Luna. The anger and pain and exhaustion and anguish on Luna's face was all too familiar.
She saw the exact same thing each and every day in the mirror.
In that sense, Clarke felt something of a kinship with Luna. They had both been through and done so many terrible things. Either for themselves or for what they believed was right.
And yet now suddenly all they had was each other.
Clarke finished prepping the food and she put them in the living room. Becca, as one would expect from a billionaire, had a rather amazing setup that still worked. Even after two nuclear apocalypses. She even had a vast library of shows and movies that were all available to watch.
It reminded her of the few shows and movies, she would watch with her father on the Ark. Their selection was a lot less varied than what Becca had, but she had always enjoyed it all the same. It was even better whenever Wells and Thelonious could join them.
Clarke picked up the remote and she flicked past show after show after show. She finally settled on one. In all honesty, Clarke didn't have much of an idea about any of the shows, but the title of this one pulled her in.
She was about to go to check on Luna when she heard a door slam open. Clarke followed the noise and a pit formed in her stomach as she caught sight of Luna bowled over the toilet.
Clarke knelt across Luna and made sure to pull her hair back. It was no moment too soon as Luna's body lurched before she began to puke. Clarke put her other hand to pat Luna on the back.
"Just get it all out," Clarke said to Luna whose face was twisted in a grimace, "You'll be alright."
"Clarke, you can go," Luna said as she managed to lift her head, "I'll be—"
Luna cut herself off as she bent over the toilet bowl once more. Clarke knew what Luna was getting, but she stayed put. She'd dealt with a lot worse than this and there was no chance she'd leave Luna to go through this alone.
"I'm not going anywhere, Luna," Clarke said as Luna turned back to her, "You were out for three days in Polis. I can't and won't leave when you're like this."
"If this is what you want then I cannot stop you" Luna sounded sour but her face, contorted in pain as it was, made it clear she wasn't being serious.
Finally, after a few more minutes Luna was only dry heaving. That took about three minutes to clear up before Luna was finally done. Clarke handed her a wet rag to wipe herself before helping Luna back to her bed.
Thankfully, Luna's body temperature was still normal from what she could tell. Clarke wasn't entirely sure what could have caused Luna's bout of vomiting. It could've been as mundane as food poisoning to intense pain from her or even radiation poisoning
She flushed the toilet and thankfully there wasn't much to do in the way of cleaning up. Once that was done, she walked back into Luna's bedroom and the other woman was already trying to stand up.
Clarke nipped that in the bud immediately. She pushed Luna back onto the bed which seemed to frustrate Luna quite a bit. Clarke had dealt with unruly patients before though and Luna was being tame compared to what Clarke had gone through.
"You need to rest," Clarke said as she sat down beside Luna who turned away from her, "I'll bring you some water and food and then leave you to get some rest. Is that alright?"
"No."
Luna was curt in her response and
"This is for your health, Luna," Clarke said only a little frustrated, "I know it sucks, but you need to take it easy. I–"
"It's not that," Luna said as she fiddled with the covers, "I just...Before this, before Praimfaya, I was always around people. Then, I had to watch my people die and then you know what happened in the lab..."
Clarke clenched her fist at the memory.
"I am not used to being alone," Luna said finally meeting Clarke's gaze, "I do not want to spend my time locked away in this room all alone."
Clarke grabbed onto Luna's nearest hand. Luna's confession was strikingly similar to what had plagued Clarke. That terrible feeling of being all alone. Clarke was thankful she was alive, but before finding Luna the bunker had felt a prison, not unlike her cell on the Ark.
"You're not alone, Luna," Clarke said a small smile pulling at her lips, "We're in this together."
It was the truth. It would be just the two of them for who knows how long. The last thing Clarke wanted was for Luna to feel alone, more alone than they already were. It was hard and would be hard to quantify to Luna just how much her very presence helped Clarke, but she hoped she'd find a way soon enough.
"You can relax with me in the living room," Clarke said breaking the momentary silence. Luna's gaze was so intense it threw Clarke for a loop. The black depths of Luna's eyes seemed to cut right through Clarke.
She managed to recover though, "I found what looks like a good TV series to watch. I think you'll enjoy it. The cast is amazing."
It was then that Luna said something that made Clarke flounder.
"What is a TV series?"
The next few weeks were...confusing for Luna.
It wasn't anything Clarke had done. Far from it. Clarke had helped Luna with whatever she needed. Luna had barely needed to do anything on her own while she was still in recovery. Clarke wouldn't let her.
Her lifestyle hadn't been too healthy since the first time she had gone to Arkadia and it had only worsened before the Conclave. Her ribs had been visible through her skin and her skin had long lost its healthy glow.
Even her hair had been in bad shape. Knots and twists that had taken a few showers and combs to fully rectify. Clarke had been there to help her, as always, and soon her hair was back to normal. As normal as curly hair was.
Nothing they had done had been able to straighten her hair. Luna wanted to change her hair, but a passing comment from Clarke made her reconsider.
"Why do you want to change it? I always thought your hair looked great."
Her hair didn't bother her so much after that...
Clarke was a godsend for Luna during her recuperation period. Bringing her food, clothes, water and medicine. Finding books and drawing tools or even explaining something on the television. The current 'series' they were watching seemed to be about a killer that was in love with her target.
It was very entertaining even if she needed a few things explained to her. Thankfully, Clarke didn't seem too bothered by that. Clarke didn't seem bothered by anything really. She made sure Luna had it all often without asking.
Luna felt conflicted about that.
It was hard for Luna to be a burden. She was used to people coming to her for help. That was what she had changed Floukru into. A refuge for those tired of a cruel world. She'd help all the people that came to them.
Adria's village had been burnt to ashes by the Mountain Men and Reapers. Clint had been held prisoner by Trishanakru for over a year before he was let go only to find his entire village had been massacred by his captors.
There were many more people with stories like that and they all came to Luna and no matter what she helped them. Except for Skaikru. The one time she had refused to help someone it had snowballed into a mess that led to her losing herself in anger.
Luna was unused to being the one being taken care of. She had never let anyone in on what troubled her. As a leader(when she was one) she had to be unbreakable at all times. Even with Lexa, she hardly ever spoke about what was troubling her specifically. Only what her people needed.
And yet, here she was being looked after by someone she had almost gotten killed twice. It was deeply ironic and far more than she deserved.
A sound from the kitchen drew her attention. It was now rather late in the night. Their sleeping patterns were only just returning to normal, Luna was pretty sure Clarke went to sleep after her and also woke up before her.
Now and then, Luna would hear Clarke moving around in her bedroom very late or very early in the day. It was both impressive and worrying that she seemed to always be at 100% no matter what.
Having finished up in the kitchen, Clarke walked into the living room carrying two plates of food. She usually did not eat with Luna and almost immediately Luna frowned when she received hers. The portions were not the same size. Her plate had quite a fair bit more than Clarke's.
Clarke had been dead set on nursing Luna back to health and in truth, it had worked to perfection. Luna had regained the weight she had lost and looked just as healthy as she had been on her Rig. Her body no longer felt any pain from the Conclave or the drilling for bone marrow.
She was fully healthy now.
It was why she could not keep taking more than Clarke.
"Take some of my food," Luna said before Clarke could sit down, "You're doing enough for me as is and I am deeply grateful for that. However, I shouldn't be taking more food than you"
Clarke's eyes were wide open as she processed Luna's words before she spoke, "You're still recuperating. I can—"
"Clarke," Luna said looking into the other woman's eyes, "Please. I feel a lot better now. You don't need to give me so much food."
They remained in silence for a bit as Luna tried to implore Clarke to take some of her food with nothing, but a look. It seemed to work as Clarke sat down next to Luna and together they split the food evenly.
Once they were done, Clarke did not move away. Instead, she put something on the television and settled in beside Luna. Between the food and a series Clarke had found about sea animals, Luna should have been fully relaxed and at ease.
Yet, all she could think about was how amazing it was to have Clarke so close to her. Luna knew what the tingly feeling she got around Clarke was. Whether it was Clarke's fierceness or her kindness or her selflessness or her beauty, Luna had begun to feel something for Clarke. Something deep and profound and scary.
Something she did her best to hide from Clarke.
Clarke finished eating first and after taking her plate away she sat on one of the other couches with a drawing pad. Occasionally, she'd catch looking at her and they'd exchange a smile. The feelings that conjured made Luna focus just a bit more on what was on the TV whether it was a crazy and beautiful blonde assassin or a whale. However, Luna was still a bit disappointed by the increased distance between them.
She had only seen a few of Clarke's sketches, but she had never seen the ones in the drawing pad Clarke was using now.
Maybe one day, Clarke would let her see them.
Later, long after the food had settled within her Luna prepared to go to bed. Before she moved though, Clarke began to go through a few stretches. The majority of which seemed to be focused on her neck and back.
Luna's eyes traced up and down Clarke's body. Her clothes rose with every move she made revealing quick flashes of skin. It was a while before Luna's mind caught up with her.
"Are you okay? You seem a bit stiff."
"I'm fine," Clarke said in the middle of a stretch and a rebellious part of Luna couldn't help but follow the curve of Clarke's body as—
"I just haven't been sleeping so well," Clarke said as she finished her last stretch, "My bed is a bit uncomfortable and there's just been a lot of stuff on my mind."
Luna frowned. She had a good idea of what was troubling Clarke.
"You should sleep in my room," Luna said laying her hand on Clarke's knee, "We can swap rooms. You've done so much for me it's the least I could do."
"Not a chance," Clarke said shaking her head and causing a bolt of frustration to shoot through Luna, "I'll deal with it. You can keep the bed."
Clarke's stubbornness was proving to be the end of Luna. It was an admirable trait most of the time, but it was frustrating when it ended up hurting Clarke instead.
Looking back on it in the future, Luna wasn't sure what spirit had possessed her to give her next suggestion.
"Then we can share the bed."
The words left Luna's mouth as soon as she thought of and a part of her wanted to take it back immediately. She did not, though, for reasons that she dared not to dwell on.
Clarke did also seem a bit taken aback by the suggestion. Her eyes pierced Luna's own as if she was searching them for an answer. The suspense was torture on Luna and just as she was about to take it back, Clarke answered.
"Okay."
Somehow, that made her more nervous than anything.
"R-right, I'll take the dishes back and take a shower," Luna said her hand trailing off of Clarke's leg as she rose to her feet.
"Um, yeah," Clarke said after a moment's pause, "I need to shower too, but I'll be there."
It took Luna a lot of effort to walk away and act as if this wasn't an absurd situation to be in.
Luna was the first one to make it to the bed. Maybe it was due to an inexplicable bout of nervousness or maybe Clarke just liked long showers, but it didn't really matter. She now had to wait for Clarke to arrive.
She hadn't yet gone under the covers. She had changed into a shirt and shorts. There were a lot of clothes left behind by Bekka that were not taken up into space by the other Skaikru. It gave Luna the luxury of having clothes that were just for sleeping.
Evidently, Clarke had a similar idea. She only wore a sleeveless shirt and shorts as well. Luna's eyes, once again, wandered over Clarke before she forced herself to meet Clarke's gaze.
Thankfully, Clarke had seemed rather distracted herself. Her eyes seemed to scan the bed for quite a while which played into Luna's favour as her roaming eyes had not been caught. That would have been terribly awkward.
"Uh, should I turn off the lights?" Clarke said after Luna cleared her throat to gain her attention.
"Yes," Luna nodded and mercifully the room was flooded in darkness.
Luna moved under the blanket and she was joined by Clarke a few moments later. They were both rather far apart on the bed and Luna was facing away from Clarke. She had no idea if Clarke was facing her or not.
"Goodnight, Luna."
"Goodnight, Clarke."
Despite saying that, Luna stayed awake. It was far from the first time she had shared a bed with someone, but this was different. The confusing nature of Clarke and Luna's relationship made for a rather uncomfortable situation. At least it did for Luna.
The trust Clarke was showing Luna just by falling asleep both pleased and yet also hurt Luna. It felt like someone was twisting a knife in her back. Did she deserve this after what she'd done at the Conclave? She'd been no better if not worse than even the Mountain Men.
Yet, Clarke seemed to have no issues about falling asleep around her. Or being around her or any issues with her at all. Clarke did not see her as Luna the Coward or Luna the Leader. She did not see her as Luna who rejected the Flame or as Luna the Brother-Killer and she did not even see her as Luna who had tried to end the human race.
Clarke just saw her as Luna. Something so simple and yet so powerful. The freedom and rush of emotions that came with that made Luna's heart flutter in her chest while also making her feel unworthy of it all.
Luna wasn't quite sure how long she laid there. No matter how long she closed her eyes for, sleep seemed to evade her at any turn. In contrast, Clarke was fast asleep. Luna turned around and she saw that Clarke's face was settled into a peaceful expression.
Luna couldn't look away.
At some point, Clarke began to murmur in her sleep. It didn't really catch Luna's attention the first few times until she caught onto the words that were being said.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This is all my fault."
Luna turned to Clarke and she frowned as she Clarke's face contort as if she were in pain. Tears trailed from Clarke's eyes and her body began to twitch every now and then.
Luna shuffled across the bed towards Clarke and began to shake her awake. It took a few seconds for Clarke to wake up. Her eyes wide and unseeing as she sat up and searched the room while unintelligible words escaped her mouth.
All the while, tears and frantic words continue to spill forth from Clarke.
Luna sat up and grab hold of Clarke pulling her into a hug. Luna had to steady herself so she didn't fall backwards as Clarke continued to thrash around. A cold feeling spread from somewhere within Luna as she Clarke in such anguish.
"It's just me, Clarke," Luna said as she pulled Clarke even closer, "It was just a dream, Clarke. You're okay. Say it tome. You're okay. "
"I-I'm okay."
"You're okay," Luna affirmed speaking right into Clarke's ear, "I'm here for you. There is no need to panic."
Her words seemed to work as Clarke finally realised that she'd been having a bad dream. Her breaths were slow and heavy as she laid in Luna's arms. Clarke's head was pushed into the crook of Luna's neck by a gentle yet firm hand from Luna. Their breathing synched up from how close they were.
Luna couldn't help but feel bad for Clarke and mad at herself. Clearly, Luna had been so invested in her own pain she had not noticed what Clarke was going through. The same person who had saved Luna from certain death.
"It's okay, Clarke," Luna said as she ran a hand through Clarke's hair, "It was not real."
Clarke's presence seemed to invade Luna's being. She smelled of fruits and spring and her body was quite cold making goosebumps appear on Luna's skin. Her breath tickled Luna's neck and the thrumming of Clarke's heart added a level of intimacy and intensity to their hold.
They sat there in silence. Their legs splayed all over the bed now that they were in a sitting position of sorts. Clarke had also wrapped Luna in an embrace Clarke's breathing began to stabilise before she finally spoke.
"I'm sorry for waking you up," Clarke said and her voice sent vibrations into Luna's neck.
"Don't apologise for that," Luna said and she could feel Clarke's tears soaking into her shirt, "I'm always happy to help you, Clarke. No matter what it is. We're in this together."
A choked noise escaped Clarke's throat before she pulled back from the hug. Their faces were inches apart and Clarke's eyes dazzling blues gave away to an equally beautiful black. Luna had to take a deep breath to steady herself.
"Can we sleep like this?" Clarke asked and she sounded nervous maybe even scared, "I...I like this. Having someone with me. Having you with me."
"Of course," Luna said and it was all she could say.
It was a slight struggle to get comfortable, but perhaps that was more so out of nervousness than any position they were in. In the end, Clarke and Luna ended up flush against each other facing the same direction. Luna's left arm was below Clarke's body, but she kept her right arm by her side.
Or at least she did until Clarke took Luna's right hand and placed it over her hip. She laced both of their hands together and finally, Luna felt like they were in the perfect position. Her arms were around Clarke's waist and she just ever so slightly pulled them closer together.
"Goodnight, Luna."
"Goodnight, Clarke."
Clarke was fast asleep barely a minute later. Clarke's proximity provided a sort of soothing comfort to Luna. The experience of being so close to Clarke, someone she found deeply amazing, put Luna's mind at ease. Soon the storm that had been brewing in her mind for weeks finally cleared away.
It was the best sleep she'd had in years.
Nightmares had been a constant companion of Clarke for a while now. With all the things she'd done, it was inevitable. What she had done was all so her friends could survive so she would probably do it again if given the choice. That being said none of what she had brought her any sort of joy or satisfaction.
In the bunker, the nightmares only seemed to become more and more common. Whether it was the isolation or the boredom or just her guilt catching up with her, she wasn't entirely sure. What it did mean was that Clarke had gotten used to running on less and less sleep as time went on.
The less she slept, the less she dwelled on her sins. It was easier to just nurse Luna back to health and keep them preoccupied during the day. She had been surprised, not only when Luna had offered up her bed but also when she had accepted the offer.
Clarke and Luna were quite a bit closer than they had been. Initially, there was just a bit of awkwardness between them. That had faded for the most part, but every now and then, there were instances were Clarke wasn't so in control of herself. Luna would smile at her and it would feel like the world was off its axis.
Take now for instance. Clarke was the little spoon to Luna's big spoon. Her eyes traced up and down what she could see of Luna's muscular arms and somehow Clarke felt right at home. She could feel Luna's heartbeat pounding away and it was a soothing sound. It relaxed her.
A part of her had always wanted this level of closeness with someone. First Finn, then Lexa and sometimes Niylah, but they both knew that they wanted different things. In short, the chance for something like this had always been stripped away from her.
Finn was never really hers, to begin with. Niylah never wanted anything more than the casual fling they had had. And the one person Clarke had resonated with on a deep level died because of her.
Clarke knew she hadn't spent much time with Lexa, but the time she had spent with her had been precious. She'd fallen hard and fast, but Clarke could honestly say the feelings between them had been genuine as could be.
There had been times where she was tempted to use the Flame to speak to Lexa or just to see her one more time, but it didn't sit right with her. The dead were gone. Clarke had to accept that and soldier on.
Doing that was made easier by her current circumstances. Finding Luna in Polis had been the remedy to the soul-crushing loneliness she had been feeling.
Luna was surprisingly talkative. As she got healthier and healthier, her demeanour became a lot more positive. It became easy for Clarke to see why so many people had been a part of Floukru. Luna had this magnetism and mystique around her that pulled Clarke in like a vortex. Luna was sweet and polite and caring to an insane degree.
All of which were traits that Clarke could not ignore.
Plus, Luna was just stunning. It was hard to look away from her especially after she had begun to exercise once more. The raw attraction to Luna had probably been there for a while. Her beauty was undeniable, but when coupled with what was below the surface Clarke did not stand a chance.
Everything within her was screaming at her to take a risk.
Twice now her heart had opened itself up and twice now it had been broken to pieces. Clarke could have buried how she felt and just not do anything about how she felt about Luna. That was the easy route, but Clarke felt she deserved more.
It would be difficult and Luna probably didn't feel the same, but Clarke would open her heart up all the same. The chance that Luna could somehow reciprocate how Clarke felt was worth the potential fallout should Luna not feel the same.
All Clarke had to do was open up fully and be honest with Luna.
Not a hard ask at all.
It was very hard to open up.
Their day had gone the same as usual. Clarke saw that they still had enough supplies, but they were getting some cabin fever. Clarke wanted to go out and explore what was left. The Rover would make things pretty easy. They had agreed to set off towards Shallow Valley tomorrow which apparently had the best range of food.
There were some guns in the back which could help take out any animals. The preserved food was okay, but Clarke would be lying if she said she did not want real food. The fishes floating on the water had all been picked off so she knew there were other animals somewhere.
She just had to find them.
That didn't quite matter now, though. All of Clarke's attempts to speak to Luna went off the rails and badly. It wasn't really Luna's fault, it was more Clarke not having the guts to bring things up.
They'd spoken all about whatever they watched on Becca's TV, life on the Ark and on the ground, but they steered clear of anything too close to home. It was maddening that it would only take a few words from Clarke to get the ball rolling.
Now, here she was waiting outside Luna's room. Night had long fallen on them... Clarke knew she would not be able to go to sleep having failed her task.
"Clarke? Are you there?"
Here goes nothing.
"Uh, yeah," Clarke said walking into the room and she took one look at Luna in her sleepwear before turning away. She had been lucky to not get caught yesterday. It was best if she didn't push her luck.
The peek she had gotten at Luna's shorts and tank top had been great.
Clarke closed the door and dimmed the lights instead of turning them off. Luna didn't seem to mind as the room was plunged into an intimate sort of lighting. She probably thought it had to do with Clarke's nightmares.
She sat on the bed and, much like yesterday, they were both on opposite ends of the bed. Outside of the room, they had no issue being near each other, but in here things were just different somehow.
Clarke didn't even have the guts to face Luna just like yesterday. Even when they were spooning, Clarke had been afraid of what she would have done if she stared at Luna's face for too long.
This time, though, whether it was the darkness or a one-time burst of confidence, Clarke was actually able to say something that more personal than most of their previous conversations.
"Sorry about last night. The nightmares usually don't get that bad," Clarke said as she looked up at the ceiling, "Usually, I deal with them a lot better, but things have been different since—"
"Praimfaya?" Luna asked and her interjection startled Clarke a bit, "I already told you, Clarke. You don't have to apologise."
Clarke felt Luna shift around and from the corner of her eye, she could see that Luna was also looking up at the ceiling. They sat beside each other in silence for a while before Luna spoke.
"Your nightmares," Luna said causing Clarke to tense up a bit, "What are they about?"
"The things I've done on Earth," Clarke said with surprising ease, "I feel like a monster. Hundreds, if not thousands of strangers, all dead because of me. I see their faces. They're always dead. Some are burnt to a crisp, others have these blisters..."
Clarke closed her eyes as the memories resurfaced, "Sometimes they attack me and try to kill me the way I killed them. Sometimes I'm tied to a chair and they scream and shout and cry at me."
The beginnings of tears were beginning to form in her eyes.
"Sometimes, they just look at me. They don't say anything and they just stare. They look at me like I'm a monster or disease that just needs to be killed off."
Clarke took a shuddering breath before continuing.
"I always try to apologise," Clarke said feeling hot tears streak across her cheeks, "I beg for forgiveness, for redemption, for salvation, for punishment, for anything. I never get it..."
The room was silent and Clarke was thankful for it. The darker room made it easier for her to gather her thoughts even when it was about something as so deeply unsettling as this. Why had she wanted this?
"I think the worst is when I see them," Clarke said opening her eyes once more, "My father. Anya. Finn. And—"
Green eyes flashed through Clarke's mind. A body gushing black blood and a strong voice wavering by the second as—
Luna grabbing onto one of Clarke's hands brought her back to reality. She turned to face Luna and the frown on her face pulled at Clarke's soul. Almost immediately, Clarke had to turn away from Luna. Did Luna not realise what Clarke had done?
She did not deserve any sort of comfort from anyone.
She did not pull her hand away, though. The gesture was so small and yet it gave her the strength to power through the murkiness.
"And Lexa," Clarke finished and she took another moment to steady herself, "Her death could have been prevented if I hadn't been selfish. I don't deserve your comfort or—"
"Stop it."
Clarke turned to Luna and a part of her was taken aback by Luna's expression. She had a deep frown and her brow was furrowed. It was a cross of sadness and anger and understanding that made Clarke's heart were even tears forming in Luna's eyes.
"Just stop," Luna said her eyes shining with emotion.
"What happened to Lexa was not your fault. All of what you did was to save your people," Luna said as she turned to look up at the ceiling, "I know what a monster is. I've seen far too many in my life. You are not like them."
Luna sent shivers up Clarke's spine as her thumb circled the palm of Clarke's hand. Clarke moved closer to Luna as if she were a campfire and Clarke was freezing to death. Luna copied her almost immediately.
They met in the middle of the bed so close to each other that their thighs brushed up against each other. Luna's breath hitched for just a moment and she reclaimed Clarke's hand and placed it in her lap before speaking.
"You took it upon yourself to let your loved ones survive. At all costs," Luna said her voice just a touch above a whisper, "You saved me even after what I tried to do at the Conclave. A lesser person would have left me for dead or killed me right there and then."
"I would have deserved it too," Luna said and the melancholy in her voice was impossible to ignore, "Since I woke up all those weeks ago, I wondered why you would go to such lengths for me. The last time we saw each other, I was trying to kill you. To kill everyone."
Clarke forced herself from the bed to look towards Luna and from this close up, the tears were all too visible.
"I know it's because you're an amazing person, but I—" Luna trailed off but it wasn't hard to fill in the gap.
Clarke freed her hand from Luna's grasp. Luna turned to face her at that and Clarke used the opportunity to wipe away the tears on Luna's face.
Her hands cupped Luna's face and she used her thumbs to wipe Luna's tears away. All the while, Luna stared at Clarke. The vivid brown of Luna's eyes had been replaced with an inky black.
"No one can blame you for what you did, Luna," Clarke said leaving one hand on Luna's cheek, "You lost all of your people in a matter of days and then we tied you up and drilled you for bone marrow against your will."
Clarke shook away those memories.
"That's excluding everything before then. I can't imagine how hard being a nightblood must have been when growing up," Clarke said as she raised her other hand to Luna's neck, "You were one of the only people who actually wanted peace. Actual peace. Not power or influence or anything like that. You were the only person Lincoln said he trusted to take the Skaikru kids in and keep us safe."
Luna's eyes flicked down to Clarke's lips before looking up.
"Not Indra or Anya or Lexa, but you," Clarke said as both her hands now held onto Luna's face.
"I saved you because I wanted to and I wanted to save you because you deserve a second chance just as much if not more so than anyone else."
Clarke moved over and she was now straddling Luna. She could feel Luna's breath on her face and she could smell the faint scent of her shampoo. Luna's eyes met Clarke's and this time neither of them did or could or would look away.
"I know I'd do it over and over again because I know you. The real you and you deserve it."
Luna's hands had been by her side, but slowly and carefully they began to trail up Clarke's thighs. The feel of Luna's scarred, but gentle hands on her skin sent sparks throughout Clarke's body. Her nerves tingled with energy as she felt each and every one of Luna's fingers trace their way up her body.
"I want this, Luna. I want you. All of you. ," Clarke murmured as she pressed their foreheads together, "Everything you are, were and will be. I want it all."
"Do you want me?
It was a long second before Luna answered.
"I do."
Luna's hands were still tracing up Clarke's legs. When Luna's warm and strong hands came to rest on her hips, Clarke took the plunge. Their lips brushed against each other for a fleeting moment before Clarke closed her eyes.
Clarke pressed her body closer to Luna as their lips finally met. Luna let out a low moan that lit a fire in Clarke's chest. She pushed her tongue into Luna's mouth and she grabbed onto Luna's hair. Her fingers scratching against Luna's scalp as they raked through Luna's luscious hair.
Feeling Luna's tongue rolling against her own, sparked something within Clarke. She began to grind against Luna causing her to moan into Clarke's lips.
Clarke shivered as Luna's hands began to move from their spot on Clarke's hips and onto bare snuck her fingers underneath Clarke's shirt causing her to let out a soft whimper as Luna's fingers traced and scratched at sensitive.
Clarke pulled back from their kiss and began to kiss and suck on Luna's neck as she traced shapes onto Clarke's back. Luna's moans got louder as Clarke nibbled on the sensitive skin.
"Clarke, please," Luna's voice was choked with emotion and desire, "I need more. Give me more."
Clarke moved from Luna's neck and gave her another deep kiss. Luna's hands moved to Clarke's ass and squeezed hard. A heady feeling came over Clarke as she rolled her tongue over Luna's. Her chest began to burn for air and Clarke ignored it for as long as she could before moving back.
"Stand up," Clarke breathed to Luna as she moved off of the other woman's lap, "I want to see all of you."
Luna's eyes flashed with desire and anticipation as she got off the bed. Clarke sat on the edge of the bed as she took Luna in. Her hair was messier than usual thanks to Clarke raking her hands through it. Her neck had dark bruises on it, again courtesy of Clarke, that made Clarke want to dive in again.
Luna grabbed onto the hem of her shirt before pulling it up. The shirt was thrown somewhere and Clarke could not care less about that as she took in Luna. Her nipples were hard and capped two beautiful breasts.
Her abs were taut and faded scars littered Luna's body— permanent reminders of the life she had chosen to leave behind. By the time Clarke met Luna's gaze once more, a brewing storm began to rage within her.
Luna removed her shorts and panties in one motion leaving her bare to the air. Clarke could feel her heart quicken as she took in Luna in all her glory. Corded muscles blended with soft skin and flowing hair framing a beautiful face.
Clarke didn't even realise she was moving towards Luna until it was too late. Their breath mingled with each other as Clarke looked deep into Luna's eyes. Clarke's very soul quivered with desire before she finally touched Luna.
Her hand rested on Luna's hip and reeled her in. Luna's body felt divine against Clarke as they met in another fiery kiss. Her hands ran over every inch of Luna's body in a hurry as if this were a dream that she would be ripped free from.
Clarke left hand came to rest on one of Luna's breast. The smooth and supple flesh gave way as she caressed it with restrained desire. Luna sighed into Clarke's mouth and she placed a hand over Clarke's own hand already on her chest.
Small means would escape Luna every so often and she began to slide and grind her pussy onto Clarke. Clarke's skin was all but set aflame at the point of contact. All of a sudden, Clarke wanted nothing more than to take her clothes off.
She did just that as she broke their kiss. Clarke didn't bother giving Luna a show and with two quick motions, she too was fully nude. Luna seemed enraptured by Clarke's body her eyes unblinking and unmoving.
Clarke sat down on the bed and spread her legs. The position made her feel vulnerable, but seeing the want and desire in Luna's eyes squashed that almost immediately. Luna got ahead of herself as she tried to kneel between Clarke's legs, but Clarke stopped her.
"This is about you now," Clarke said and she pulled Luna in a sitting position between her legs. The position was rather similar to the way they had slept in this very bed.
Luna was a bit taller than Clarke, but thankfully it was nothing drastic so when Clarke pulled Luna into her, Clarke's mouth was right by Luna's ear. Feeling bold, Clarke licked the shell of Luna's ear which seemed to excite Luna more as she asked, no, begged for some relief.
"Clarke please, uhm," Luna's words were cut off by Clarke's hands ghosting over her breasts, "C-Clarke, I—oh."
Luna's words were cut off yet again as one of Clarke's fingers traced up and down her core. Luna was biting down on her lip so hard a bead of black blood leaked out of it. Clarke used a finger to wipe it up before she licked it clean.
"You're delicious, Luna," Clarke whispered into her ear as the metallic taste washed over her tongue. Clarke moved her free hand to one of Luna's breasts and she began to tease and toy Luna's erect nipple.
Luna was shuddering as Clarke continued to stroke the outside of her pussy and tease her nipple, "Do you want more? Or is this enough?"
Luna's back pressed into Clarke and her breasts were stimulated by Luna's increasing movement. Her nipples ground into Luna's muscular back. This sent a current right through Clarke as she relished her closeness with Luna.
"I, uh, yes," Luna's voice gave out for a bit as Clarke's fingers ran over her clit, "Give it to me, Clarke. I want it. I need it. I need you."
That was all she needed to hear. Clarke slid her index and middle finger down Luna's slit before guiding them into Luna's warm pussy. They were surrounded by a searing heat and Luna let out a wanton moan of relief and desire.
Clarke began to pump her fingers in and out at a moderate pace. Her thumb settled over Luna's clit and began to tease it with quick brushes and strokes. It felt as though Clarke was a master musician playing Luna as an instrument.
Luna's thighs locked over Clarke's hand as she began to buck and grind against Clarke's fingers. Luna's right hand teased her unattended breast while her left hand grabbed onto Clarke's thigh for support. All the while, Clarke continued to whisper in Luna's ear as she guided her along.
Luna's grinding began to speed up and Clarke's hand was covered in Luna's juices. Luna's core grew tighter and warmer and wetter as Clarke continued to do her best to bring Luna to the edge.
Luna's eyes were lidded as Clarke leaned in and whispered in her ear, "You're almost there, Luna. You're so hot and wet and tight. Just let go, Luna. I'm here for you. Just forget about everything and focus on you."
Her words seem to galvanise Luna who began riding her fingers even harder. Clarke pushed a third finger into Luna as her thumb caressed Luna's clit. She continued to pump her fingers in and out of Luna who seemed to be drunk with pleasure her hips undulating as she lost herself in her pleasure.
Luna's breathy moans morphed into loud and hoarse grunts. Her thighs squeezed Clarke's hand hard enough to bruise but she barely felt it. She could feel Luna's very being tense up as her movements sped up— a desperate need for relief possessing Luna.
The fact that she could bring this much pleasure to Luna filled Clarke with a sense of accomplishment. Clarke wanted to show Luna just how deep her feelings for her went. This wasn't just about sex, it was something more.
Clarke began to circle Luna's clit with a bit more speed and pressure which brought on the beginning of the end.
"Oh, Clarke, please don't stop," Luna blundered out as her hips jerked back and forth and back and forth, "Please don't-—Oh, Clarke!"
Luna's went from saying Clarke's name to a guttural and visceral scream. Her body pushed against Clarke as everything reached a fever pitch for her. Clarke continued to pump her fingers even as she felt Luna's pussy squeeze and clench on her fingers. Her hand was sprayed with Luna's juices as she continued to help Luna ride out her orgasm.
Her thumb continued to rub Luna's clit even as Luna's scream ascended from hoarse to voiceless. Luna jerked and shook against Clarke over and over and over before her body finally collapsed. Luna's head hung forward her hair falling to frame it. Her shoulders drooped down and still shook every now and then.
Clarke pulled her hand out from Luna drawing a weak moan from her. Her fingers were saturated in Luna's juice who just managed to roll off of Clarke and lay down on the bed. Luna's eyes bored into Clarke's as she raised her wet and sticky fingers to her mouth.
Clarke moaned as she licked Luna's juices off of one of her fingers. The cloying and musky scent of Luna filled the air of the bedroom and pressed down on Clarke like an invisible force. Luna's eyes were fixated on her as she made a show of licking her finger.
She straddled Luna and leaned down to whisper, "I couldn't help myself. It's like I said, you're delicious."
Luna seemed to enjoy the visual—and Clarke did too. She was about to lick another finger clean when Luna grabbed onto her wrist. Clarke's world spun and her head slammed onto the mattress. Luna loomed over her grip still firm on Clarke's wrist.
Luna opened her mouth and slowly slid Clarke's fingers in her mouth. Her tongue swirled around Clarke's fingers and the sensations that conjured felt as though she'd stepped on a live wire. Luna pulled Clarke's fingers out her mouth before licking her lips.
"I guess I am."
Luna's smile was sinful and it robbed Clarke of the ability to speak. She could do nothing but just take in Luna's beauty as she guided Clarke further onto the bed.
Luna straddled Clarke and gave her a fleeting kiss that lasted barely a second. Clarke tried to chase after Luna's lips, but Luna pushed her back down to the bed. Clarke tried to put her hands on Luna, just to feel her, but Luna was having none of that. She pinned Clarke's hands to the bed in one quick motion.
"Keep your arms down," Luna said and from this close Clarke could see the thin sheen of sweat on Luna's skin. The smell of Luna's sweat and arousal mixed with Clarke's own to make an addictive and heady scent.
Luna slid down to Clarke's neck where she began to kiss and suck. A sharp gasp escaped Clarke's lips as Luna bit down on her neck hard enough to break the skin. The flash of pain was replaced by mind-melting pleasure as Luna sucked at the wound licking up the dark blood that leaked out.
Luna's hands moved away from Clarke's before trailing up her side. Clarke's skin prickled as she felt Luna's fingers trace her side before coming to settle on her breasts. Clarke let out a deep sigh as Luna's long and talented fingers began to massage her breasts.
Luna pinched Clarke's nipple making her lurch forward. Clarke let out a whining moan that seemed to spur Luna into action. She moved from Clarke's neck and began to suck on one nipple whilst pinching the other.
Clarke gripped the blankets tightly in her hands as the sensations overtook. Feeling Luna's hands and mouth and tongue on her nipples was almost too much for her. Any words she tried to get out would dissolve into moans as Luna sucked and pinched at her nipples.
Slowly, Luna began to move downwards. She laid kisses between Clarke's breasts before continuing to move down. It took an agonising amount of time for Luna to go down Clarke's front until she finally, finally, reached her goal.
Luna's hands left their post on Clarke's breasts—a void Clarke filled with her own hands. As she began to pinch and massage her own breasts, Luna began to pepper kisses along her thighs.
Luna slowly kissed her way up Clarke's thighs before stopping right as she got to Clarke's pussy. Luna blew on Clarke and the warm air washed over Clarke sending tingles up her spine. Again, Luna blew on her pussy driving Clarke crazy at the teasing.
Luna's tongue swept up and down Clarke's pussy. The strokes were tortuously slow and short, Luna seemingly content with taking it slow. Clarke could not form any words, only gasps and moans escaped her lips.
Gradually, Luna began to lick her faster and deeper. Clarke's hips began to undulate as pure ecstasy was pumped into her. Luna's swipes grew longer and deeper causing Clarke's moans to go higher and higher. The slow build was then blasted apart as Luna's tongue swiped over her clit.
"Oh fuck," the sharp bolt of pleasure took over Clarke. It was as unexpected as it was intense. Luna lapped at Clarke's lips occasionally swiping at Clarke's clit. A coil began to tighten within Clarke as Luna's tongue continued to rain pleasure down on her.
Clarke was unaware of anything beyond Luna's mouth on her. She stared up at the blank ceiling as she immersed herself in the pleasure. She had no idea how much time had passed when Luna added two of her fingers to the mix. Her lips and tongue continued to bathe the outside of Clarke's pussy.
Luna's fingers rubbed against her G-spot which each exit and entry. Clarke raised her upper half off the bed and she looked down at Luna whose eyes were firmly pinned on Clarke's. Her hands were either side of her, the only things stopping her from collapsing to the mattress once more.
The intimacy from eye-contact coupled with the pleasure Luna was giving her whited Clarke's mind out. Luna added a third finger inside her of before her strokes sped up drastically. Clarke's thighs settled on Luna's shoulders her ankles locking as soon they were in place.
Luna sped up her strokes and Clarke's thighs pulled Luna closer, in search of more pleasure. Clarke raised a shaky hand to squeeze and pinch at her breast. Luna let out a moan as she took in the sight of Clarke writhing in pleasure.
Clarke could feel herself getting closer and closer to the edge. Luna sped up her assault once more. Her fingers made squishy noises as they drove in and out of Clarke. Her licking zeroed in on Clarke's clit and stayed there. Clarke's whole body felt as if it were on fire as the coil in her tightened and tightened before breaking.
Her legs locked around Luna and pulled her in as Clarke rode out her orgasm. Luna continued to lick and stroke at Clarke as she collapsed to the bed. The waves of her orgasm growing and building as she tried to ride it out. Clarke could only repeat Luna's name over and over and over again.
Her pussy encased Luna's fingers in a vice and tried its hardest to keep them inside. Clarke's hands were at her breasts pulling and stroking and pinching. All Clarke could see or feel or hear or taste was just pure pleasure as she rode out her orgasm.
Finally, Clarke's movements began to slow down as her orgasm faded away. A comforting warmth settled over her as the last vestiges faded away. She looked down at Luna who had a wide smile on her face.
Luna pulled her fingers out of Clarke drawing a weak moan from her. Luna settled beside her and offered Clarke her fingers. Without hesitation, Clarke took Luna's fingers in her mouth. Her tongue bathed and ran over Luna's fingers as she tasted her own juices.
Luna's eyes were aflame with desire as Clarke looked up at her. Luna pulled her fingers out of Clarke's mouth and she and she bent down and replaced them with a kiss. It was a chaste kiss one that lasted just a few seconds and yet it was maybe the best one they had yet.
Once they separated, Luna fell down beside Clarke and they turned to face each other. A comfortable silence settled over them as Clarke tried to get her brain working again. The intensity of what they had just shared still affecting her.
"Luna," Clarke began and her voice was hoarse and scratchy, "That was— I just—wow."
Words could not capture how Clarke felt.
"I'll take that as a compliment," Luna said a radiant smile on her face.
"I feel like I owe you one, but I'm so tired," Clarke said a but apologetic, "Because that was just amazing."
"I will be fine," Luna said as her hand came to rest on one of Clarke's, "The world will not end tonight. That already happened a few weeks ago."
"Oh my God," Despite her words, a wide smile was on Clarke's face, "How long have you been holding onto that one?"
"A few weeks."
Clarke shook her head at Luna's answer. She squeezed Luna's hand as the warm feeling in her chest only seemed to grow. Luna was smiling back at her and it felt as though Luna had become the sun itself, breathing life and light into everything around her.
"Luna?" Clarke said and her tone was serious.
Luna quirked a brow, "Yes?"
"I'm so glad I found you," Clarke traced a circle on Luna's hand, "At first, I thought I was happy that I wasn't alone. It took me so long to realise the truth. I've been drawing pictures of you and my eyes would follow you wherever you went. I kept thinking about how much I like your hair and your smile and your voice and your laugh."
Luna's gaze was still on her and Clarke could feel the beginnings of tears form in her eyes, "So believe me when I say this isn't the sex or the situation talking, but...I love you. I know—"
Clarke felt a hand pull her forward and then Luna was kissing her. A searing and fiery kiss that stole Clarke's breath away. Her hands settled in Luna's flowing and beautiful hair as they shared a long kiss. Clarke's lungs screamed for air, but she ignored it for as long as she could until she couldn't anymore.
She pulled away from Luna just an inch. Luna's eyes were all she could see and Luna's breath was all she could feel. They were silent for just another moment before Luna said the words that brought Clarke more joy and pleasure than she'd thought possible.
"I love you too."
Author Notes:
So, that was that.
Admittedly, this could probably be fleshed out and expanded into a full story, but I'd rather keep it short.
The reason for this is that I want to write a few similar fics with Clarke paired up with someone we don't usually see her with.
If you made it this far, who would you like to see Clarke with?
As things stand, I want to do stories of Clarke with one of Raven, Octavia, Anya, Ontari, Echo, Niylah, Gaia, Becca and Josephine. If any of these piques your interest, you gotta let me know.
