"Did Kate tell you this?"
"What? No... why?"
"No offense, but it's too on point."
"I happen to be very astute to these kinds of things," Melvin scowled.
Sophie's eyes narrowed in skepticism.
"She told you not to tell me," she said after a moment.
Melvin stared off, struggling to find the words that toed the line without breaking his word to Kate.
"It's ok. Your silence is louder than whatever nonsense you're about to spew," Sophie said with attempted indifference. The truth was that Sophie felt like a silly schoolgirl with a crush. Inwardly she was gushing as though she'd accidentally bumped into her crush in the school yard and found out she knew her name. It was enough to stir a hope in Sophie that had waned in recent weeks.
Over the last thirty minutes of interview preparation, Melvin had attempted to slyly insert suggestions to better position herself during the interview. It didn't take but a second for her to immediately recognize they weren't his own words. It wasn't that she doubted Melvin's intelligence, it was that he wasn't remotely interested in any of this preparation work and didn't have the faintest clue about how to study for it. She'd spent this time trying to fight off the temptations of thinking too much into it, but a tiny part of her couldn't suppress the giddiness at the fact Kate had given her advice through Melvin. That Melvin wasn't able to immediately deny it only made fighting this more difficult. It was a small step but one that gave her a reassurance, as trivial and minor as it might be, that Kate's feelings hadn't completely dissipated.
"Soph?"
"It's Sophie," Sophie said, shaking herself back to reality.
"Well I tried that, but you were all googly-eyed over there," Melvin smirked before his face fell slightly.
"What?"
"Um, there's something else," Melvin began. "And I'm only saying this because I see that signature Sophie Moore smile of yours and know what's causing it, and I just… look, we haven't really talked about it; you and Kate, I mean."
"What? Melvin I've told you what happened."
"I know, but, well, we haven't talked about your feelings since."
"You want to talk about my feelings?" Sophie asked, an amused grin on her face.
"I just don't want you to get your hopes up."
"What do you mean?" Sophie asked, her grin fading slightly as Melvin wore worry.
"I think…" Melvin sighed, struggling to share his suspicions from the night before. "I think she might be seeing someone."
"Oh."
That piece of information hit Sophie harder than she expected. A part of her forced a shrug back at Melvin as she feigned indifference, but a larger part felt like a piece of her had just been snatched away.
It was such a selfish reaction to be sad, but it didn't stop the pang of it from coming. She'd made her bed at the end of last term. She'd told Kate 'no'. It wasn't the other way around. Sophie knew she had no right to question what Kate's personal life was after that, but that didn't stop the tiny 'what if' from whispering in her ear: what if they hadn't broken up?
"Do… do you know who?" Sophie asked, daring Melvin to tell her.
"Sophie," Melvin began, knowing any information would be worse than none at all. "Do you really want to know?"
"I don't know," she replied honestly, feeling the sharp tightness from a moment earlier return at full force. "Does…" Sophie began again before losing her voice to cover it from cracking. "Does she seem happy? At least tell me that much."
Melvin could only stare back, his eyes turned in sadness. Sophie nodded at his silent answer, refocusing her attention back to the practice questions. "Good," she said just above a whisper. "That's good."
"Sophie, I-"
"It's fine. It's… it'd be silly to - to think…" Sophie's voice faded to fight back the quiver threatening to reveal her emotions.
"What if you just told her?" Melvin asked, voicing what Sophie wouldn't.
"We should really get back to this," Sophie replied, her tone unconvincing, but Melvin took the hint.
"Sure."
"Are you Sophie?"
"I… yes?" Sophie said, startled by the interruption. She glanced up to identify the voice and instead found a stranger staring back at her. She scanned the girl for clarity, but instead watched her settle into the seat across from her as though they were scheduled to meet. Melvin had left her less than an hour earlier, and her focus had returned to the coursework she'd been neglecting in order to prepare for the upcoming interview.
"I figured," the girl said. "Bookish, attractive, alone at the library…"
"I'm also one of maybe eight black women on campus," Sophie offered. "So your odds were pretty good."
"Fun fact: I did not know this about you, but it does explain some of the cryptic descriptions I got when I started asking around," the girl replied casually, recalling the circuitous route to this lone table nested in the delves of the library's third floor.
"Sorry, how… who are you?"
"I'm V."
"Like the letter?" Sophie asked, still trying to place this person.
"You know your alphabet, too," Veronica mused lightly causing a scowl to fix itself to Sophie's brow.
"Uhm, look if this is about the spring symposium, I already told Lieuten-"
"It's not."
"Oh. Uh… ok? What is this about?"
"Kate."
Sophie blanched. "What about her?"
"You fucked that up a bit."
"Excuse me?"
"But it's not too late to fix it."
"Fix… fix what?" Sophie asked, getting a sinking suspicion that this V knew more on the topic than she was comfortable with.
"I'd come out and say it, but I hear that's not your thing," Veronica said casually.
Sophie flinched at the jab. As Veronica's words sank in, she felt strangely disoriented, a surge of hurt and anger swelling inside of her as she tried to get her bearings. She didn't know who this V person was, but it was obvious that Kate did. More than that, there was a good chance she'd gone ahead and shared intimate and private details with her. Following this swell of emotions came the nausea of paranoia: if Kate was telling this stranger about their relationship, who's to say word wouldn't get back to a superior officer. It was this combination of emotions that churned inside her as Veronica surveyed her before continuing.
"Too harsh?" Veronica asked, noting the embodiment of discomfort fidgeting across the table.
"No, just… surprising to hear it from someone I've never met before," Sophie replied, trying to maintain an even tone as anxiety crippled her ability to think. "I'm not sure what she told you, but-"
"Very little, actually. It's more in what she doesn't say that makes it pretty apparent."
"Meaning?" Sophie asked. There was a flash of anger in her reaction, but mostly it was in search of confirmation that perhaps Kate hadn't betrayed her greatest secret - that maybe she hadn't run and shared the very thing that had motivated their breaking up in the first place. Instead of reassurance, Veronica took the conversation down a different path.
"Let's just say I've got something in common with Kate, and once that much was clear, it didn't take a genius to see what's behind that finely crafted facade of hers."
"That doesn't make anything any clearer," Sophie said, fighting the urge to get up and walk away. "And frankly, I'm not really interested in hearing what you have to say. Whatever Kate has said is her prerogative, but leave me out of it."
"Oh, I see. You think she outed you," Veronica said in understanding. "Relax, it wasn't her. No one is ever as subtle as they think. That and people talk," Veronica smirked.
"Fine," Sophie said, trying to hide the surprise of Veronica's latest remark. While there was the tiniest bit of solace in hearing Kate wasn't the villain in this, it didn't relax her to think that some of her peers had put two and two together. "But look, I don't know who you are or what you think Kate has going on, but I can't fix it. So whatever your… motivation is for being here? It's pointless."
"Can't fix it or won't fix it?" Veronica asked, honing in on Sophie's choice of words. Sophie hesitated again at her tone, noting it wasn't accusatory. Instead it sounded genuine, like the balance of this conversation teetered on knowing the difference.
"How do you know Kate?"
"Do you always deflect when you're uncomfortable?"
"No, it's a habit I picked up from our mutual friend," Sophie answered easily for the first time.
"Oh, that was good. You're fun. It's too bad I'm graduating this year, you're closeted, and Kate has dibs on you, otherwise you'd be on my list," Veronica winked with a mischievous grin.
"Dibs?"
Veronica grinned wider. It amused her that this studious cadet cruised past all of the other inconsequential details she'd rattled off and narrowed in on the one that mattered most to her.
"At least as long as she's still in love with you," Veronica explained easily. Her tone was light with indifference, but she could see the words landed with the precision she'd expected.
"She said that?" Sophie asked with hopeful surprise. Somehow the suggestion of this stymied the tsunami of worry from engulfing her.
"You're like a raccoon."
"What?"
"Did you ever read Where the Red Fern Grows?"
"When I was a kid, why?"
"It's so good; definitely top ten. I cry like a damn baby every time I read it," Veronica said distractedly. "You're like that raccoon."
"I… isn't it - I thought it was about dogs," Sophie said, not understanding the comparison or the context for it.
"Hm? Oh, yea, but in the beginning when the boy's grandpa teaches him about that raccoon trap; it uses a log and some nails and some shiny piece of metal. It's so simple, but it does something remarkable. It takes advantage of the raccoon's weaknesses: shiny things and stubbornness. It's a perfect combination that traps the raccoon at no one's fault but its own," Veronica explained easily.
"You know there are faster ways to insult someone, right?" Sophie asked, her brow slowly morphing into a permanent scowl. The roller coaster of this conversation was quickly eating into Sophie's patience. More than that though, she didn't like being strung along or taken for a fool.
Veronica laughed. "Sorry, it wasn't meant to be."
"Then what was it?" Sophie replied, her scowl now set.
"A compliment: I've volleyed a slew of distractions at you, and with each one you manage to focus with laser precision on the one you want to hear about," Veronica explained, pausing for Sophie to agree with her. When she didn't, Veronica broke into a grin. "She didn't have to tell me."
"Then how do you-"
"I can count on one finger the number of negative things she's said about you, and even then it was only because it was teased out of her, and I'm half convinced she immediately regretted it."
"That could be considered a lot if you've only ever talked once," Sophie replied with a growing tightness in her chest. "But I get the feeling that isn't true."
"You're perceptive, too," Veronica said lightly.
"Clearly not because I still have no idea who you really are or why you're here."
"I'm a friend of Kate's," Veronica said as though stating the obvious.
"A friend?" Sophie asked. She ignored the shock of surprise at her own forwardness as her eyes narrowed and a slow surge of jealousy built.
"New, obviously," Veronica said either not seeing or choosing to ignore the glare and suggestion coming from Sophie.
"You were the one who ended things, right?"
"I… yes, technically."
"Technically? What does that mean? That you both wanted it in the end?" Veronica scowled.
"Well, no, I just mean… yes."
"Ah ha" Veronica said, leaning back into her chair as she surveyed Sophie for a moment. Sophie, for her part, felt another wave of discomfort at the gaze coming from Veronica.
"Ah ha, what?" Sophie asked, speaking past her discomfort.
"I like being right. So why'd you do it?" Veronica asked. "Actually, no, don't tell me. I don't care that much. I'm already overdoing it."
"Ok…"
"Look, I don't want to tell you how to live your life."
"Then why do I feel like you're about to?" Sophie said with more annoyance than she meant to reveal. She knew she didn't have a poker face, but any attempt to conceal her mounting anxiety was better than nothing. She wasn't sure if this V person was trying to make her jealous, but it was working, and it was a feeling she was neither used to nor comfortable with.
"Because I am. That last bit was some fine print in case you listen to me and everything still goes to shit," Veronica grinned. "So here it goes: you messed up a good thing. I can tell it was a good thing because Kate is a good thing, and I don't say these things lightly. Plus, while it's only been a minute, you seem like a good thing."
"I… I don't understand," Sophie said, thrown by the direct yet utterly ambiguous words.
"Either fix this or accept that she's going to move on."
"Is that a threat?" Sophie asked with a scowl, her body stiffening in surprise.
"No," Veronica said, shaking her head lightly. "It's just the truth."
"What makes you think I haven't accepted that?"
"Because I met lover boy last night, and if he wasn't an obvious indication, this scowl of yours is: you regret what you did. The question for you is whether you regret it enough to actually do something about it."
"Even if I did, which I'm not saying I do-"
"We can play this like a hypothetical if you want, but let's not pretend you're kidding anyone."
"There's no chance it would ever work. She's barely talking to me as it is."
"I've never liked statistics," Veronica sighed. "They always persuade people away from risks. Are you risk averse, Sophie?"
"I… yes. But who isn't?"
Veronica shot her a small smile. "People who don't live with regret. Like I said: fix it or accept she's gone and that you've lost her. And don't beat around the bush; she deserves better than being played and strung along."
"I'm… I'm not trying to string her along," Sophie said quickly. "She's made it clear in not so subtle ways that she wants nothing to do with me."
Veronica shrugged. "Maybe. My guess? That's because she doesn't know what she wants. You have the advantage of knowing her though."
"And you don't?" Sophie asked, trying to hide the concern in her voice and not trusting herself to say more.
"Not in the same way," she replied cryptically.
Veronica tapped the top of the table with a finality as she stood to leave.
"Does she know you're here?" Sophie asked.
Veronica paused in thought for a moment. "What do you think?"
"I feel like you know Kate well enough to know this isn't something she'd endorse."
"You should follow those more."
"Follow what?"
"Your feelings."
a/n: hi all,
We are T-minus five days until Batwoman season 2 takes us by storm. It really hit me today that we won't all tune in to see Kate Kane don the red cowl on Sunday. I binged the first half of season 1 in early January last year and was hooked. It was raw, edgy, and still figuring itself out, but I could already imagine the potential for the storyline. Like all great, slow-burning shows, I was especially itching to see more of Kate and Sophie's relationship, which is what inspired me to start this little story last year.
I'd never written a word outside of school in my life and had no idea how long I was going to do this for. There were certain characters (ex: Beth/Alice) who terrified me - they were so vivid on screen and in their dialogue/performance that my meager writing experience shied away from it. So I triaged what I was semi-confident in from what I wasn't remotely capable of tackling and came up with a rough plotline. Fast forward ten months, and this story is nowhere near where I thought it would be. That rough outline is long gone. I never planned the flashback chapters; they just came out of the process. Melvin was never supposed to exist. Renee Montoya was added after a night of deep internet sleuthing of Batwoman comics. Now that I've had a hand at writing characters like Riley, I'm encouraged to revisit Alice. All of this has evolved out of the discovery of Kate Kane's Batwoman and the nuances that go with it.
But more than going in a direction I never anticipated, this story is probably nowhere near what the writers had in mind when they started Kate's journey. Even more unlikely is seeing any of this ever develop on screen after last summer's news.
For that I am sad. I had hopes of a Kate Kane superhero; of seeing such an amazing comic book character come to life. I clung onto the final episodes of season one hoping to glimpse the batmoore we all craved and was heartbroken when it unravelled into nothing. But I'm also really happy. I'm happy that I've had the privilege of writing this alternate version and that you, readers, have been such a fun, engaging, and supportive community to present this story to. While this isn't at all what I expected, I'm happy I've found an unexpected joy in writing and a thrill in the opportunity to post it weekly for you all.
As always, a very genuine thank you for sticking with this story.
Cheers,
EQT.95
