Chapter Four: The Dad of Weaselton

A/N: Sadly, this is my last T-Rated chapter. While I'm trying to keep the violence to a minimum, it is also necessary for the development of the plot. While I'm not going down the "Sacrifices" route again, some villains might die gruesome deaths. I will spoil that Joseph's face gets badly burned in the next chapter, but he'll be fine by the end of the story, I promise. I just need something to give Judy the drive to kick some ass.

Fifteen months ago…

The firemammals worked tirelessly to put out the large blaze that had engulfed the Silverback Shades apartment building. The ZPD had put everyone that survived the blaze outside and across the street.

Wendy Canudiggit was there, sobbing her poor heart out. "Mommy! Where's my mommy?!"

Grizzoli approached the child. "I'm a-sorry, dear. You momma and a-you poppa no make it."

"BAWW!-HAWW!-HAWW! What are me and my brother gonna do now?!"

"Do you have-a the next of kin?"

"No!"

"Hoo-boy! I'm-a sorry. Looks like-a you two are heading to the orphanage."

Grizzoli talked to his partner, Delgato. "Poor kids. Now-a they growin' up without-a their parents. The baby boy, he likely to get a home, but the girl? I doubt it. Shame, but that's how it is in adoption. Peoples always wanna bambino, never a kid. They probably gonna separate them."

"Separate who?" Delgato asked.

"The kids! You-a no pay attention?!"

Delgato looked around. "What kids?!"

Grizzoli looked back. "They's-a gone!"

"This is why you don't talk about people within earshot! Let's go look for them."

Wendy ran down dark alleys with her baby brother, Charlie bundled in her arms. She was scared. Alone. "I'm not gonna let them take you from me! You're all I have!"

As the police gave chase, she darted down back alleyways and over dumpsters. Slowly but surely, she ended up on the seedy side of town. She found a corner and piled some garbage on top of her. The police ended up running past her. "Where did she go?! Dammit! We'll have to write a missing person's report." She was relieved to see them leave, until a large bobcat grabbed her by the scruff of the neck.

"Well, well. Look what we have here?" said the snaggle-toothed bobcat. His looks matched his stench. "You all alone little girl?! Wanna come home with me? I'll treat you real nice. Heh-Heh!"

She tried kicking and swatting at him while using one arm to hold on to Charlie. "Lemme go, you creep!"

"Well, aren't you a feisty, little treat! I think I'l-OW!""

Duke Weaselton knocked the bobcat down with a baseball bat. "Hey, Rook! What'd I tell ya about staying away from my alley?!"

"It's a free world, Duke!" Rook argued.

"It ain't a free world 'ta be doin' creepy stuff 'ta little girls! Now beat it!"

The bobcat ran off. "You're safe now," Duke said to the girl.

"Th-Thank you," she replied.

"Yer welcome. Now, beat it! 'Dis ain't no place fer kids."

"What?!"

"You don't speak English?! Get lost!" He started to walk away.

"W-Wait! I have no place to go!"

"Yer a kid! Go to a church. The orphanage! Anywhere but here! Here stinks!"

"My parents died tonight! If I go to an orphanage, my brother's likely to get adopted and I won't!"

"Yeah, well… 'dat sucks. Bye!"

"Please! Just… just show me how to survive on the streets. Like you do! I won't give up my baby brother for anything. Can you show me the ropes?"

"No! I don't wanna get involved in any of 'dis!"

"Then I'll do it on my own and… and probably get killed! Then, you'll be sorry!"

"No, I won't. Bye, kid." As Duke turned the corner to go to his place, he could hear the sobbing coming from the possum girl. "Awww, no. Don't. Don't do it, Duke! She ain't your problem!"

"Sob! Mommy!... Daddy!"

"SIGH! Aww crap!" He turned the corner. "Alright! You can stay at my place fer 'da night and I'll teach you 'da ropes tomorrow."

"She wiped some tears away. "Oh, thank you! Thank you!"

"I gotta warn ya, my place is a mess."

"I don't care!"

"My electricity comes from an extension cord."

"I don't care!"

"It's under dripping pipes."

"I don't care!"

"And it stinks worse 'dan me."

"... Is that possible?"

"I'm out."

"Wait! Wait! I'm kidding! I'll sleep on the floor if I have to"

"I got news for you, 'da couch feels worse. Anyway, 'da name's Duke. Duke Weaselton."

"My name's…"

"I don't wanna know yer real name! I want no attachments when I kick you outta here. Fer now, you're Bandit and 'da baby is Smokey."

"Why those names?"

"It's based on a movie I used 'ta watch wit' my dad growin' up the few times he was home. The few times when he wasn't drunk.'Dose were good times… 'AHEM!' Anyway, come wit' me."

Duke took her downstairs to his place. "Welcome to 'Casa 'Del Weaselton!'"

"Is this technically a place?" Bandit asked.

"We're underneath an apartment complex. It's where all 'da pipes go through. 'Da landlord don't charge me rent 'cuz I'll fix any ipes he asks. 'Dat and he can't legally make me pay rent here. But in turn, I'm not legally supposed 'ta be here so it all works out. There's a TV over 'dere along wit's some of 'da bootleg DVD's I sell. You can watch a movie if you can get the TV 'ta work. Just give it a good smack."

"Where's the bathroom?" she asked.

"Over in that corner. Just go in the bucket and pour it out 'da sewer drain under ya."

"Eww."

"I already told ya kid, 'dis ain't 'da Ritz. Be thankful I got a curtain just in case I ever got company."

"What about a shower?"

"Same corner. Watch." He took a wrench and loosened a lug nut and the pressure caused it to start spraying water out. " 'Dis is why I keep 'da extension cord off 'da ground. 'Da sewer drain also makes a good escape route. I know all 'da underground tunnels."

"How can you live like this?! I think you'd be better off in prison!"

"Prison can actually be a nice change of pace from time 'ta time, but I'm free here. Now go do yer business, and go to bed. I'll teach ya some tricks tomorrow and 'den yer outta my life forever. Got it?!"

"Yes, sir.

"I mean it! I ain't a charity case! Tomorrow night, yer gone!"

One Week Later…

"You still ain't got it down, kid!" Duke said to his understudy who now has managed to stay at his place for a week. "Like I said before, take it like you own it. Watch and learn."

Duke saw a hippo walk down the sidewalk. The weasel looked around to make sure no one was in sight of him. The hippo had his wallet attached to his back pocket with a chain. A challenge for some pickpockets, but not for Duke Weaselton. He casually kept pace with the hippo and gently yanked the wallet out, making sure to time his steps with the large mammal. He took out the bills and put them in his own pocket. He then let the wallet hang, ran around and tapped the hippo on the leg. "Excuse me, sir!"

Bandit was in a panic. "What is he doing?!"

The hippos stopped. "Yes?"

"I noticed 'dat yer wallet is hanging out of yer pants. Ya gotta be careful around here."

"Oh, thank you, mister! I'm such a clutz!" He looked in his wallet. "Aww no! The bills fell out!"

"'Dat's a shame! Well, if I see 'dem, I'll come chase you down, okay?"

"Gee! Thanks sir! You sure are nice!"

"Yer welcome. See ya around!"

Duke walked back to Bandit and they both laughed. "Why did you let him notice you?!"

"I can't put 'da wallet back in his pocket without him noticin' and he might feel the wallet hittin' his butt and thought I stole from him. Now he doesn't suspect me at all. I robbed the guy, and he thanked me! HA!"

"You are the master, Uncle Duke!"

"Hey! It's just Duke! And you, my little student, are still outta here at the end of 'da week!"

One month later…

Duke was nervous. It was Bandit's first big steal from a Targoat department store. He waited in the food court with Charlie in his arms and watched with breathless anticipation. She came around the corner with a large, (for them) 24-inch HDTV.

Duke was ready to pull his fur out. "What are ya doin'?! Yer stickin' out like a sore paw!"

She then really surprised him as she approached an associate. "Excuse me mister? This TV is kinda heavy. You look strong. Can you put it in the cart for me?"

Duke's jaw almost dropped. The dumb antelope was more than happy to put the TV in the cart for her. "Thanks, mister!" She said. "She then turned around and shouted to no one "Hurry up, Mommy!" She then exited the store and Duke immediately followed. Making sure to walk quickly, but casually as to not arouse suspicion

He caught up to her. "I can't believe 'dat worked!"

"As you always say... 'Take it like you own it!' " she said back to him.

"I'm so proud 'a you! Now, aim 'da cart towards that car near 'da end of 'da parking lot, 'den we'll take it out of the cart and run like hell!"

They didn't get a chance as the associate came out of the store. "Hey! Where's your mother?! I never saw a receipt!"

"Okay, plan B! We strap Smokey in and ride this thing down 'da hill! Hop in!" The store clerk chased after them, but Duke was too fast. He pushed the cart past the parking lot and towards the hill. "Hold on tight!"

Outside of the shopping center, the street went down a very slanted hill. Duke pushed the cart there and jumped on as it rolled with lightning speed down the street. Duke leaned the cart left and right to avoid the cars. It was dangerous, but they were having the time of their lives. "WHEEE!" Yelled Smokey with his arms raised.

Duke was loving it. "Suck it, Targoat! No one can stop Duke and the Bandit! WOO-HOO!"

Hours later, the cart was ditched in an alley, the TV box, now empty along with the old TV was in a dumpster. Duke and the kids were sitting down, eating dollar-store popcorn and watching some bootleg DVD's on their new TV.

"That was so awesome!" Bandit said.

"Aww, yeah!" Duke replied. "'Dat was a hell of a steal, kid! Good job!"

"These bootleg movies still look fuzzy, but it's nice to watch them on a TV that I don't have to hit constantly just for the picture to come in. Plus, I get to see movies that are still in theatres! I'm so lucky!"

"Yeah… Hey, I've been thinkin'."

Bandit looked sad. "I know, I know. You want me gone."

"Bandit…"

"I've managed to hang on too long and I'm sorry! I…"

"I was gonna say… I could use a partner in crime."

"... Yeah?"

"Yeah. So… If you wanna stay… I guess… I mean, sometimes I get caught and it might be nice 'ta have somebody watch 'da place while I'm gone."

She jumped up and hugged him close. "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you! Duke! This means everything to me!"

Duke smiled. "Y'know, if you wanna go back 'ta calling me 'Uncle Duke', I wouldn't be offended."

"So how long can I stay?!"

"As long as you like. Y'know, you did a bigger theft job than 'da TV."

"I did?"

"Yeah. You stole my heart."

"I love you, uncle Duke."

"I love you too, kid. Smokey too."

Four Months Later…

Smokey is old enough to walk now and is holding Bandit's paw. "Unc will be home from prison soon Smokey, are you excited?"

"Ah, bababah!"

"Me too! He doesn't like it when we're by ourselves for too long, so let's get these groceries in the house right a….way?"

A weird wolf had approached her. He wore a skin-tight, purple outfit that lit up around the edges of the uniform, goggles and a very large nose on the front of his snout. He stared at her, and sniffed. "Hmm… Sniff! Sniff! Female possum. Age seven and four months. A smell of confusion and fear. Little brother is 18 months old. Sniff! Sniff! Both have been in the care of one Duke Weaselton. Sorry child, your caretaker owes the boss and you're the collection."

"What?!" He sprayed a chemical in her face and the last thing she saw was a bag placed over her head.

The next memory after that is a very drowsy awakening. Almost like a dream. She was in a well lit, glass room and laboratory assistants were passing by her. One of them spoke. "Experiment 821 has awakened. Please release sleeping gas."

"What?! N-No!" Gas entered the room and she passed out.

The next thing she knew, she was home. She was lying on her couch. The wonderful, glorious couch with the broken spring that stabbed her sides. Her pillow was Duke Weaselton's leg. Or rather, what was left of it. "Wh-What's going on?! Uncle Duke?"

Duke was rubbing her back. He was trembling all over. There was also the strong smell of blood on his shirt. "Yer home. Yer safe. 'Dat's all 'dat counts."

"Where's my little brother? Where's Smokey?"

" 'Dey still got him. But I'm gonna get him back. I promise."

"Who's they?!"

"The mob… I think. 'Dey got a place. A very bad place."

She looked down and saw that his left leg was nothing more than a stub at the knee that was wrapped in gauze. "You're leg! What happened to your leg?!"

"It don't matter! Yer safe."

"But unc!"

"I don't wanna talk about it!" He said sharply. "Look, kid. I talked 'ta Mr. Big. He'll get us Smokey back. I just gotta do a few odd jobs fer him. Actually, it's a lot of odd jobs. 'Dere's gonna be some new rules. One, you don't go out at night. Two, you don't go anywhere without me! Three, fer now, I'll do all 'da stealin'. I can't risk you gettin' exposed. 'Dey might try 'ta nab you again."

"But what if you get caught by the cops again?!"

" 'Den stick 'ta rule number one. Not that I think it matters. 'Dese bastards. Whoever 'dey are. If they want you, 'dey'll get you. I brought you home via 'da sewers so hopefully 'dat big-nosed tracker 'dey got can't find ya. You go take a shower. 'Dat'll wash off most of the smell. Can you stand up?"

"I-I think so." She went to stand, but she stood up too fast. "Dizzy! I gotta sit! I.." She fell to the floor.

"Bandit!" Duke shouted.

As she hit the floor, she split. There were now two Bandits.

Surprisingly, Duke didn't freak out. "So 'dat's what they did you ya."

Bandit looked at herself, passed out on the floor. She was shocked and horrified. "Uncle Duke! What's going on?!"

"I wish I knew, kid. 'Dis place I got you outta. It's bad. REAL bad. I think 'da mafia is experimentin'' on people. I saw some crazy stuff and barely made it out with both your life and mine. If I try 'ta go back fer Smokey, I ain't gonna make it."

"H-How did I make a double of me?! How do I go back?!"

"I dunno. Maybe it's when you bumped yerself."

She grabbed at herself. "Hey! Wake up, me! Wa-" she accidentally absorbed herself and woke back up. "WOAH!... WOOOOAH!"

"I know, right?!"

"I-I remember seeing myself passed out. What's happening to me?!"

"You can make a double of yerself. Looks like the two of ya share 'da same memory when you absorb her. Try slapping yer face or snappin yer fingers."

She snapped her fingers and the double appeared. "Woah! Can I make two of myself! Can I make more?" She snapped her fingers again and nothing happened. "Rats!" If she had asked the duplicate to snap her fingers back then, she would have found out that she can make more than one of her a lot sooner.

"Cool!" her and the double said together. "Now I can watch my own back!... Was my butt always that big?"

"Hey!" she shouted to herself.

Present Day

Duke and Bandit were reunited once more. "It's so great 'ta see you again!" Duke exclaimed. Did 'da cops hurt ya?"

"No. The one I had was really nice, and she had a big family."

" 'She!' Wait, Who?!"

Suddenly, they heard a "PBBBBBFFFTT!"

"... Did you just fart?" Duke asked.

"No! Wait. I heard that sound on the bus!"

She opened her backpack and Greg leaped out. "Gotcha! You thief!"

"You're in my hideout, Greg. Who's got who?"

"Ummmm.. Well, I left a text and my GPS on, so my mommy is coming to arrest you!"

Duke was concerned. "Arrest?! Wait! Who's kid is this?!"

"Her name is Judy Wilde."

"Judy Wilde?! Like Nick Wilde's wife. Formerly Judy Hopps?!"

"Ummm…. I guess?"

Duke started to panic. "I'm dead! I am so dead!"

"Why?!"

"I've told ya about her before! She's my arch-nemesis!"

"Since when are you important enough to have an arch-nemesis?!"

"This kid can stay, but me, you and yer other yous are leavin' right now!"

Duke went to run out the door, when Judy came crashing through the window. BAM! She landed her knees on Duke's chest. "What are you doing with my kids?!"

"AAHH! She ain't yer kid!" Judy punched him. "OW! 'C'mon!"

"I'm talking about Greg and my baby joey, Sugar!"

"'Dere's a baby in 'da backpack?!" PUNCH! "OW! Stop that! I didn't know about 'da kids!"

Bandit split into four and pulled Judy off of Duke. "Knock it off! I didn't know he was in my backpack!"

"No, it's my backpack!" Greg yelled. "And you stole it! You… You stealing, stealer!"

Then sugar popped her head out of Greg's pouch and yelled. "BAH!... Bah! Bah!"

Finally, Duke yelled "THAT'S ENOUGH! All of you just… stop for a second! 'Dere's been a bit of a mix-up! Can we just sit down and talk about this like adults?"

"No!" Judy yelled. "Your under arrest for kidnapping!"

"No, he's not!" Bandit yelled. "I can make dozens of me now and there's only one of you! Don't make me fight you Judy!"

Duke couldn't believe his situation. "Of all 'da cops who had 'ta babysit you, it just had to be my arch-nemesis!"

Judy was confused. "Arch-Nemesis?! You're not my arch-nemesis!"

"Sure you are! You're like… my main adversary!"

"Maybe to you. I dealt with much bigger villains than you. You're merely an irritation."

"Well, thanks a lot! 'Dat makes me feel a lot better." Duke said with dripping sarcasm.

Bandit held Judy's paw. "PLEASE don't arrest him Judy! He's all I have. He's my only hope to get Smokey back." She dug through the backpack. "Look! I got a briefcase, a-and a stack of bills! Oh! And a pearl necklace to boot! I can multiply those!"

Judy was furious. "Where did you get those?!"

"Ummm…"

"Tell the truth!"

"From the grandpa's basement."

"Those are Finnick's!"

Greg jumped up and down. "HA! I told you! She's a thief!"

"Yes, Greg. We know."

Bandit explained. "I told you before, I need to multiply that money in the briefcase, so we can pay off Mr. Big and get Smokey back!"

"That's not going to work! They don't have Smokey, some chemical lab called 'Chemiracles' does!"

"Yer both right," Duke replied.

This surprised Judy. "What are you talking about?!"

"Can we sit down and talk like adults?"

Judy agreed they all sat down on the couch. "OUCH!" Judy yelled.

Bandit laughed. "HA! You got the spring!"

"GRRR!"

"Don't make her mad, Bandit!" Duke warned. "Maybe you bein' here is a blessin' in disguise."

"What do you mean?"

"Well… Yer tough. You solved a lot 'a cases. Maybe you can help us get Smokey back!"

"... How?"

"I dunno! Yer a cop! You come up with 'da 'how'! In 'da meantime, I help you, you help me."

"I'm not teaming up with you!"

Duke then put it bluntly. "I know fer a fact 'dat 'da mob has been either usin' volunteers or kidnappin' children and sendin' 'dem to Chemiracles labs were 'dey do experiments on 'dem."

Judy was stunned. "Wait, if this is true, both the missing children case and the mob case ARE connected! How do you know this?!"

Duke pointed at Bandit. "Because 'dey kidnapped her and I snuck in 'dere and rescued her back!" He then pulled his pants leg up to reveal his metal leg. "It cost me dearly. Lissen, Copper, 'dat place is a nightmare! Even some o' 'da staff are bein' held hostage! I wouldn't have made it out with her if it weren't fer Marcy."

"Who's Marcy?"

"She was 'dis nice, sugar glider lady 'dat worked on staff. She said she was forced 'ta work 'dere because 'dey wouldn't give her back her baby."

Judy's ears sprung up. "That must have been Sugar's mom!"

"Who's Sugar?"

Judy pulled Sugar out of the pouch in Greg's costume. "Her. My baby daughter. She's just a little over a year old. She was found with her mother in a knothole inside of a tree. The mother had starved to death keeping her safe. It was just in a park about a mile away from the laboratory."

" 'Dat sounds like Marcy. She said she wouldn't leave until she got her baby outta 'dere. 'Da baby's name was 'Butterfly' by 'da way."

"Kind of ironic considering she has no gliders. No powers of any kind."

"A more original name 'dan 'Sugar'. Why don't ya just have 'da ZPD storm 'da place?!"

"The same reason we can't storm Mr. Big's mansion. We need a warrant and to get a warrant, we need probable cause and some form of proof."

"You've witnessed at least two attempted icings."

"True, but Mr. Big has the most high-priced lawyers money can buy, making him untouchable. That said…"

" ' 'Dat said', what?!"

"If you and Bandit were to testify everything you saw before a judge, we could get a search warrant on Chemiracles and the ZPD can search the property."

"Now way! I ain't goin' anyware near 'da law! I don't even like 'dat she was babysat by you!"

"If we're to rescue Bandit's baby brother, the ZPD will need your assistance!"

"Oh NOW 'dey want my assistance?! What, instead of just lockin' me up fer days on some petty theft charges?! Some of which I didn't even do! It's like, 'catch and release', catch and release'. Like I'm some sort of fish!"

Judy suddenly calmed and changed her tone. She felt guilty. "Small fish."

"... What?!"

"That's what Wolford called you a month ago. Small fish used to catch bigger fish. That's how we got some of Mr. Big's men in prison. I-I'm sorry."

"... There using me?!"

"I don't like it either. I even argued with the chief about it. If you commit a crime, you should be in prison to be reformed, not just let g-"

Duke was furious. "You all used me!"

"Hey! I argued against what they were doing to you!"

"But 'ya didn't stop it! Smokey and Bandit might not have been caught if it weren't for you stinkin' coppers! Well, you can go take 'yer kid home! We're gonna bribe Mr. Big with a briefcase full of fake cash and get my kid back!"

"If you go there and something goes wrong, then you'll BOTH be killed!"

"I only need 'da dupes 'ta make 'da fake cash!."Dat'll give me one hour 'ta pay off Mr. Big and get Smokey back."

"If you insist on doing this, then I'm going with you."

"You're a cop! If 'dey see you, yer dead."

"I'm a cop who happens to be Fru-Fru Big's bestie!"

" 'Bestie?!' "

"Well, former best friend. We had a mutual falling out due to being on opposite sides of the law."

"I remember now! I was almost iced because you were close with the mob!"

"And if I'm close to the mob and something goes wrong, I'm the only one who can convince Mr. Big or at least Fru-Fru to give up Smokey. She named her first born after me!"

"Hey, if 'da worse happens is 'dat yer dead and not me, well, 'dat works! Looks like me and you are a team!"

"Don't remind me."

"Am I going too?!" Greg asked.

"NO!" They all yelled. Judy got in his face. "You're in enough trouble as-is. You are going to stay right here with a copy of Bandit until I can get someone to pick you up!" It was then that she got a call from Finnick. "Perfect timing. Finnick, what's up?!"

"Wherever you are, get outta there! NOW! I just left the hospital! They're coming for Bandit and Sugar! They can track you! They're coming!"

"Finnick, calm down! Who's coming?! What happened?!"

"What happened?! What happened?! Well, I'll tell you, but you just have to wait until the next chapter to find out."

"Seriously?!"