Severus' POV

I had been stuck in this hospital wing for what felt like days. I hate it in here. I am now chained to the bed with invisible chains. Some form of sticking charm. If I wasn't so angry, I'd have thought it was quite clever.

I still refused to eat. I did not deserve food. Or to live. Poppy had tried absolutely everything. She had been nice and kind to me. I ate nothing. She had been rude and harsh to me. I ate nothing. She had made snide comments. Still, I ate nothing. I could tell she was reaching the end of her tether. She had, just this morning, attempted to simply spell food into my body. Upon realising what she had intended to do, I put up a wandless shield that would mean the food was not accepted by my body and was rejected back to her. She sighed in frustration as this happened more than once.

I glared stonily at her. She growled as she realised what I had done.

'Severus come on!'

'No.'

'You need to eat something.'

'I. am. Not. Hungry.'

'That doesn't matter. You need to eat.'

'I will eat when I'm hungry woman.' I was getting more and more irate. She wasn't listening to me.

'You need to eat now. If you don't, I can and WILL do what I did last time and put you…'

I was only half listening as I smelt the ever growing familiar scent of him. I shushed the matron and she huffed.

'Lupin, do not eavesdrop. It is rude. If you wish to enter the wing, do so.' I snapped.

Remus came round the door looking sheepish. My heart sang at the sight of him and I could feel my teeth elongate. He had on a simple grey pullover and yet he still looked beautiful.

I turned my head away. I had no right to think like that anymore. I did not deserve him or those thoughts. Not anymore.

'I'm sorry to interrupt Madame but Dumbledore has asked me to fetch you for him. he told me you were to go straight away.'

'But what about Mr…'

'Don't worry, I'll stay and keep an eye on your patient.'

The matron bustled away, grumbling to herself about old men and how she was getting too old for this job. Remus laughed as she went. I heard more than saw him take the seat next to my bed. I still had my body facing away from him. I lay quietly. With any luck he may think I'm asleep.

'I know you're awake Sev, I'm a wolf remember' my heart ached at the familiar way my name was shortened. I could feel myself welling up.

He sat in silence for a while. I couldn't bring myself to break it.

'I don't hate you Sev. I tried to. For a long time. But I couldn't. I wish things had been different. You need to eat, you need to get better.' He said this softly and touched my shoulder as he got up. The tears began to fall freely now.

The busy matron bustled back through the doors and he left with a smile and a wave. Madame Pomfrey glanced at me. She saw my tear stained face and sighed softly. She left a nutrient potion on my nightstand and went into her office.

For the first time in a long time, i wanted to get better. I looked down at the new bandage over my wrist. I had to fight this. For him. For them. And for myself.

I picked up the potion, uncorked the vial and gulped it down in one. I made a silent promise to my mate. I will get better. For you Remus.

And then the pain started.

I gripped my left forearm as I screamed out in pain.

He was calling me.