Panic and Anxiety
DISCLAIMER: The characters and world of Boku no Hero Academia belong solely to Kōhei Horikoshi.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: So, I had a particularly bad panic attack/anxiety attack episode. So I got everything down how I had felt. Everything in this story is all true events, but replacing myself and my few close friends are Izuku, Ochako, Shoto, Tsuyu, Tenya, Momo, and Mina. I understand panic attacks and anxiety attacks can affect anybody regardless of your age. Getting this written down and being portrayed by fictional characters actually helped me calm down after I was cared for.
Izuku never really told anybody about his episodes. He kept them to himself. He would put on a mask that would appease those around him that he was feeling okay, when in reality he was not feeling fine. He knew that there was likely some medications he could take that would reduce his panic attacks that he's been having as of late, but he was too scared to even admit he had a problem.
"Deku!?"
He felt hands hold him firmly yet gently, as his vision is replaced with a beautiful round face with brown eyes and those cute pink marks on the cheeks.
"Breathe, Deku. Breathe. Follow after me," she whispers to him calmly, gently.
Izuku's eyes were wide, tears streaming down his face, as he tried to match Ochako's breathing. He didn't realize he had collapsed to the floor of his dorm room. Around him was Tsuyu and Shoto, while he could hear in the background Tenya talking to Momo about… something.
He felt hands rubbing his back gently.
His throat felt constricted, as his rapid gasps slowly regulated with Ochako's calm breathing.
In…
Out…
In…
Out…
"Midoriya, keep it up… let the calm wash over you," he hears Shoto whisper gently to him.
"You're going to be okay," Tsuyu says soothingly, a cute ribbit heard in the end of her sentence.
He takes a deep, shuddering breath, his chest aching a bit, and then slowly he exhales. He does this three more times. A deep breath, then a slow exhale, more calmer than the last.
Someone sits gently by him, next to Tsuyu, and she is holding a cup of water.
It was Mina.
"Here, Midori. Slow sips, kay?"
Izuku grips the cup in his hands and took a slow sip as instructed, letting the cool liquid sooth his surprisingly parched throat and mouth. He then started crying. Mina takes the cup of water from Izuku as said teen clings to Ochako. Ochako wraps her arms around her dearest friend, holding him, rocking him gently.
"Sorry… I'm so sorry… I… I don't know… w-why… why I'm having these attacks," he choked out mid-sobbing.
"It's okay, Deku," Ochako whispers to him. "You're going to be alright. We're here for you. We'll always be here for you."
It was a couple minutes of silence, his crying the only noise as Ochako never lets go of Izuku. His sniffles and his soft crying was getting to him again.
"Sorry… I'm sorry…"
"We understand, Midoriya," Shoto said calmly.
"You're never alone, Midoriya. Ribbit. You got us in your life. We're your best friends. We love you."
He nods slowly, understanding, enjoying the affection they were giving him.
"I was afraid to say anything… I didn't… want to be seen as weak…"
"It's not weak to ask for help. You always help us when we need it. We'll help you," said Tenya, crouching down on the floor next to Shoto.
"Iida's right, Midoriya," said Momo, crouching down next to Tenya, looking at Izuku with great concern. "You mean everything to us."
"Yeah, Midori. Everybody will understand," says Mina, smiling warmly. "No shame at all."
Ochako gave him a gentle kiss on the forehead.
"We love you, Deku," Ochako tells Izuku. "You're very important to us."
Izuku never felt so blessed in his entire life, having this love and support when he was found having his self-claimed worst moment in life. Even with the tears that continue to cascade down his cheeks, his eyes pink, the smile he was trying hard to show them let his friends know that their words meant so much to him.
That's how it all happened for me, as portrayed by Izuku and his friends. Panicking and anxiety, it was a particularly hard one for me. It's a lot of things in my life that seem to be getting to me: work, family moving away, being alone in the sense of I'm living on my own with no one else. I'm getting help, though. My friends are helping me, too.
